


Youkai In The Mirror

by SugarRos



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Drama & Romance, F/M, Mild Gore, Mild Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-02
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2018-05-04 12:52:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 50
Words: 184,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5334839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SugarRos/pseuds/SugarRos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kagome Higurashi is lucky.  She has good grades, good friends, and the cute, popular boy in class just asked her out. But when she accidentally unleashes a very wicked youkai from a very wicked spell, her luck runs out.  Now on the run from a powerful priestess, Kagome must help Inuyasha get his revenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Legend of the Mirror

**Author's Note:**

> Hello readers. I'm normally camped out at FF.N, but I'm looking to expand for more feedback. Let me know what you think!
> 
> Disclamer: I wrote my first Inuyasha fanfiction thirteen years ago. And still, I own none of the Inuyasha series or it's characters. So sad.

Kagome

_Hey, I had fun last night. :) Do it again?_

Kagome Higurashi smiled down at her cell phone. She let her hair fall down around her face as she cupped the small handheld device in her hands. Phones weren't  _technically_  allowed on the tour, and her teacher would confiscate it if he saw her with it. But she'd had to ignore museum instructions to turn off all cell devices, because Hojou might text her.

And didn't it always come down to a boy in the end?

Quickly, her thumbs moved to text back, eyes flicking back up to see if anyone noticed her. Oh, Sango was giving her the evil eye. She watched her best friend mouth for her to put her phone away quick.

 _It's Hojou!_  Kagome mouthed back. Sango rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the tour.

 _I had fun last night too. :)_  Kagome typed,  _I'd love to do it again. This weekend, maybe?_  She shut her phone and pushed it back into her purse; eagerly awaiting the next little vibration telling her he'd texted back.

"Okay, if you'll all just follow me now – this way! Yes, stay together – gather around."

Kagome pushed her way through the throng of her history class and scooted up next to Sango, who rolled her eyes again at Kagome's giant, beaming grin.

"Oh God," she muttered, "Could you be any more smug?"

"I'm not  _smug_ ," Kagome said, feigning insult. She couldn't help the giant grin from taking over her face.

"You have it bad." Sango, whispered, shaking her head. "How the heck did you get him to ask you out anyway? Hojou is super popular."

Kagome just shrugged. "I don't know, lucky I guess?"

It was true; luck seemed to follow Kagome around wherever she went. She liked to think it was because she was a good person, and she believed she put good karma out there. Her grandfather liked to think it was the petrified mummy's hand he kept trying to pawn off on her. He was old and, she was beginning to think, senile to boot.

"You do seem to have nothing but luck." Sango muttered, although it was said with a smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

Kagome knew Sango was just teasing. In truth, her best friend since middle school wanted good things for Kagome. In fact, when Kagome initially called Sango in a panic because Hojou had just asked her out, she'd come rushing over so they could pick out an outfit to wear. She didn't let Sango do her makeup though, Kagome thought less makeup was better; Sango was a fan of the smoky-eyed look. She was rocking that look now, her winged eyeliner on point.

"This chamber we're about to walk into is old – so old in fact, that it was here before the museum was even built." The guide continued. "The artifacts we have on display down here date back to the Edo period, and are some of the most interesting artifacts because of the magic abilities they were believed to have had back in the day." She smiled at the collective scoffs and eye rolls of the students. "Of course, we realize today that these pieces are not, in fact, magic, but try to let them take you back to a time where people truly believed that these artifacts granted great power, or gave wishes, or caused plague and curses."

The class followed the guide through the giant, arched cave-like doorway, and down the stone steps. The farther down they went, the colder it got and the darker it became. The only light source burned from dozens of authentic, prehistoric torches lining the walls. They cast eerie shadows against the entirety of the walkway.

The museum had transformed into a cave, with a handful of artifacts scattered around the room. A few other people outside of their tour wandered around from piece to piece, taking their own time, pointing and conferring their museum pamphlets.

The guide ushered them forward until they stood in front of a giant mirror. The glass looked almost black, sitting inside the dark cave, and the thick golden frame was inscribed with letters – at least, what Kagome t _hought_  were letters. They were artfully etched around the entire edge.

"This," the guild said, in a theatrical, breathless manner, "is the Mirror of the Youkai." Her eyes lit up with excitement, and Kagome wondered idly if she would ever have a job she enjoyed so much herself. "The Mirror of the Youkai is very exciting because of a few reasons," she continued. "The most intriguing, however, is the story behind it."

"The Mirror of the Youkai is said to be a cursed mirror. The legend goes: there was once a great Youkai, powerful and strong, and as dark, as dark could be. He raged through villages, killing off anyone who crossed his path, even devouring children. No one could stop him, he was said to be the bringer of death – the end of the world, so the speak."

The guide smiled, knowing she held the classes' interest now, which was hard to do with a bunch of rowdy seventeen and eighteen-year-olds. "Then one day, a priestess appeared. A powerful priestess. And she stood against the Youkai. It's said that their battle raged for ten days and nights, constantly warring with each other, never resting."

"The battle was intense and horrific, and just when all seemed lost, when it looked like the priestess might lose, she wove a spell. One so powerful and so intricate, that it overpowered the Youkai and trapped him inside this very mirror." She paused for dramatic effect. "It's said that the priestess must visit him every night at midnight to re-weave the spell, or his entrapment is broken, and he will be free to cause destruction again."

The class stared up into the deep, dark glass, and Kagome was no exception. There was something a little… off about it. She almost believed there was a three-hundred-year-old demon sleeping within, ready to execute his revenge on a world that had confined him and held him captive for so long.

Something about that mirror drew her in. She took a step towards it... another one…

" _Kagome_!" Sango hissed from off to her left. Shaking her head to clear the fog that had gathered, she realized the class was moving on to the next artifact. She hurried to catch up.

Two artifacts later, and Kagome was bored again. The mirror had been the only real interesting thing down there. She was in no way a history buff, her grandfather had seen to that by constantly shoving her own history down her throat. Shrine priestess this, and shrine priestess that… She'd much rather be spending her days shopping with Sango and flirting with Hojou than learning about her lame history.

It's not like being a priestess gave her any sort of actual power, like in the story the guide had told them.  _Maybe if life were truly that exciting…_  she thought.

Her hand unconsciously moved to touch her phone in her purse. She resisted the urge to whip it out and look at it again. It hadn't vibrated yet, she knew he hadn't text her. Nothing to do but wait.

Her eyes kept sliding back to that mirror.

Two more artifacts later, Kagome had to use the bathroom.. Telling Sango of her predicament, she moved through her class towards her teacher.

"Itou-Sensei," she said. "I have to go to the bathroom."

He peered at her through his thick glasses. "Fine Higurashi, quickly now."

She smiled. "Yes sir." It paid off being somewhat studious; a teacher's trust was great on field trips. She followed the dimly-lit signs to the bathroom, the only one down in this section of the museum.

When she made it to the doorway, she realized that the bathroom was actually at the very end of a long hall.

Sighing loudly at the inconvenience of it all, she started down the hall. The only other door she passed was a janitor's closet. She reached out and grasped the door handle of the unisex bathroom, then let out a loud groan, her eyes falling on the yellow 'out of order' sign on the door.

 _Just great,_  she thought. Suddenly that giant Iced Tea from the McDonalds the school bus had stopped at on their way to the museum seemed like a terrible idea. What had she been thinking?

Ugh, she couldn't hold it. No way would she make it all the way up the stairs on the other side of

the cave and make it to a different bathroom. She had to pee  _now_.

Making her choice, she opened the door and stepped inside.

The bathroom was just as dark as the rest of the cave. She felt for a light switch and flicked it on, frowning at how the lights flickered two or three times.

_Creepy._

She ignored the yellow 'caution' sign propped up on the floor and stepped around it to open a stall. It wasn't the cleanest bathroom she'd ever seen, but it wasn't the worst, either. As long as she didn't touch anything, she should be okay.

As she settled in to do her business, locking her stall out of habit, the bathroom door opened and closed again. She heard the shuffling of feet. Strange.

 _Didn't they see the sign outside?_  She thought, then rolled her eyes. She'd seen it too, and it hadn't stopped her. Maybe someone else couldn't hold it in, either.

Finishing up, she stood and used her foot to push the handle down.

It didn't flush.

Sighing, feeling skeevy about leaving the toilet as it was, she stepped out from the stall.

And froze.

Hiromi and her gang of friends had crowded inside the bathroom. And now they stood between her and the door.

Great.

Hiromi wasn't what Kagome would call a friend. In fact, when possible, Kagome avoided Hiromi at all costs. She and her friends were popular, just like Hojou was popular, but while Hojou was well-liked by his peers for his personality, Hiromi bought her's with her CEO father's money.

"What, no flush  _Higurashi_?" Hiromi sneered, ever the polite one.

Kagome flashed her best please-don't-try-to-start-a-fight-with-me smile. She had a feeling she knew what this was about. It was a well-known fact that Hiromi had a thing for Hojou, which made it hard for anyone to get close to him. Obviously, news had gotten around about their date already, which would totally set Hiromi off.

...It wasn't Kagome's fault that Hojou liked her better.

"It's out of order," Kagome replied as sweetly as possible. She could probably take Hiromi in a fight if it was one-on-one, but seven-on-one were odds she knew she was going to lose.

"Whatever." she replied with a nonchalant hair flip. She jutted her nose into the air. "I heard that you went out with Hojou last night."

Kagome felt her back stiffen. Here it came. "Ah, yeah, he took me out last night. It was nice. We played some pool and had dinner..." She didn't mention that she'd purposely played worse at pool than she knew how. Not that she was all that good, but she'd wanted a reason for Hojou to put his arms around her.  _Which he did, thank you very much!_

"Oh, was it  _nice_?" Hiromi sneered. Kagome was getting pretty damn tired of that sneer.

"Did you guys have a  _nice_  time and eat  _nice_  food?"

She bit her lip, trying desperately to keep herself from saying something to make the situation worse.

"Did you fuck him?" Hiromi asked, her tone flat, her gaze hard.

Taken aback, Kagome couldn't help herself. "What? No! Not that it's any of your business!" she snapped, feeling anger building on the inside. What a total bitch. "Even if I  _had_  slept with him, it wouldn't be any of your business."

A wicked grin spread across the girl's face. "See, that's where you're wrong, Higurashi." She said. Kagome struggled to hold her ground. She refused to take a step back, refused to show weakness. "It is my business if you're fucking him or not, because he's  _mine_." She folded her arms across her chest. Then, to her friends: "Get her."

All six lunged at Kagome at the same time. Her hands came up to protect her face, but she couldn't do much against the sheer number of girls grabbing at her. Her hair, her clothes, her arms. They turned her around and shoved her face up against the bathroom stall, hard. They pushed her head against the metal, her arms twisted behind and pushed against her back. She tried to kick out, but they held her in a solid grip. She couldn't move.

"Now, now, what to do with you?" Hiromi purred from over her shoulder. Her gang of girls chuckled. "I could let you go," she continued, "if you promised not to go near Hojou again."

Kagome tried to hold her tears at bay. It just wasn't  _fair_. She'd liked Hojou for years, ever since he'd helped her pick up her books freshman year after a particularly embarrassing stumble in the hallway. And he finally,  _finally_  asked her out. They had a wonderful date. She laughed, he kissed her, she'd been  _happy_. She didn't want to promise not to go near him.

"…No." She finally said, steeling herself against the onslaught Hiromi was sure to release.

It was at that very moment her traitorous cell phone decided to vibrate.

"Hey!" One of the six girls called. "I think she's got a text!"

She felt a hand slip into her purse and pull out her cell phone.  _Please let it be Sango wondering where I am,_  she prayed.  _Please, please, please let it be Sango._

She heard Hiromi flip open her phone. A long pause followed. Kagome couldn't move, couldn't turn to see Hiromi's face. She closed her eyes, hoping some of her natural good luck had come through at last.

"'We'll have to get together this weekend for sure,'" she read aloud. "'What do you want to do? Bowling? A movie? Anything you want,  _beautiful_ ,'" Hojou's last word was a taunt falling from her lips.

 _Dammit, Hojou_! She thought, your timing sucks.

Suddenly, Hiromi's red, scrunched up, angry face was took up her field of vision. "You fucking liar. You  _did_  sleep with him! You're going to fucking regret the day you were born when we're done with you." She turned to her gang. "Find some rope or something in the janitor's closet, we'll tie her up."

Kagome felt her stomach drop. What the hell were they going to do to her? She knew that Hiromi was a little off her rocker, but she had no idea the girl was certifiably insane.

"Are you crazy?" Kagome cried, trying to struggle against the five girls now holding her down. She didn't do much better this time around. "What are you doing to do, tie me up and hang me by my feet?"

Hiromi stepped into her field of vision again, that wicked smile twisting her face into something inhuman. "The thought is tempting, but…. I think a little time to mull over everything you've done is just what you need. Right, girls?"

They chuckled again, muttering a 'that's right!' here and there.

"Something tells me," Hiromi continued, "that not a lot of people come down this way."

That was it; Kagome Higurashi's luck had run out.

She was screwed.

 


	2. Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Authors' Note: Good to be back everyone. Enjoy.
> 
> Disclaimer: I wrote my first Inuyasha fanfiction thirteen years ago. And still, I own none of the Inuyasha series or its characters. So sad.

Kagome

Oh, Hiromi was going to _pay_.

Kagome wasn't sure how exactly. It was a little hard to think with her arms tied behind her back and her ankles knotted together and duct tape pressed over her mouth. But once she got out of there, once she escaped, she was going to formulate a plan, and Hiromi was going to _pay_.

Kagome was normally the forgive-and-forget type. She wasn't prone to holding grudges. But who in their right mind did things like tied people up and shoved them in janitor closets? This whole ordeal was unforgivable.

She really, _really_ hoped dating Hojou was worth it.

She groaned, thinking of Hojou. Stupid Hiromi, after instructing her minions to tie Kagome up, had sent a lovely text to Hojou on Kagome's behalf.

_'Never talk to me again, you ugly piece of shit. I fucking hate you,'_ the text said. Kagome had rolled her eyes first. Anyone that knew her knew she never talked like that. But her heart sank after realizing that Hojou didn't really _know_ her, not like Sango did. He might take one look at that text and decide he didn't like her so much after all.

And after he'd called her beautiful and everything…

She wiggled around in the cramped closet space, and knocked over a broom. The handle hit her in the head, and she let out a pitiful groan, trying to reach up and rub the sore spot on reflex.

She just wanted to scream. Her arms ached. Her back ached. And crazy Hiromi had been right – no one had come down this way. Not one person had walked by, and she'd been listening intently for a chance to make some noise and make someone notice she was there.

Kagome didn't know how long she'd been in the closet now. The girls had stuffed her phone back into her jeans pocket where she couldn't reach it, and her butt was going numb and she was hungry. Had a few hours passed? It felt like it, but without knowing the time, she'd might have been stuck in there for only a few minutes.

God, she was so pissed off. More pissed off than she'd ever been in her entire life.

_"Don't worry, we won't let you starve," Hiromi had sneered down at her. "We'll be back sometime tomorrow to set you free." That slow, twisted grin returned to her face. "That should be enough time to think things over." And with that, she shut Kagome off from the rest of the world._

Forget it. Kagome refused to give Hiromi the satisfaction of still being tied up when she came back to get her. But how to break free? Her stupid gang of stupid girls knew their knots. She'd been struggling against the ropes since they'd thrown her in. _Think, Kagome. Think!_ She berated herself. She was smarter than Hiromi was, she could think of a way out of this!

She moved her fingers, trying again to pull against the ropes, and she felt a sharp sting on the tip of her index finger. "Ouch!" She cried, although it came out sounding like: "Mmmph!" What the heck had cut her? She felt around, a bit more cautiously this time, and her fingers came in contact with her ring.

It wasn't an expensive ring. It didn't have diamonds, or fancy carvings. It was made crudely of some sort of metal, maybe copper or tin. But it was special to her, because her little brother, Souta, had made it for her fifteenth birthday, all by himself. He'd gone through a creative stage at that point, and had crafted a lot of little things, all kind of forgotten and packed away with the rest of their childhood memories. Souta hadn't been very good at it, and he moved on to obsessing about drifting and cars instead. But that ring he made her was special, and she hadn't taken it off since he gave it to her.

Tears pricked at her eyes at the thought of what she had to do to that ring now. She hated Hiromi even more for making her destroy something that was so special to her. Hoping that Souta would forgive her, Kagome wiggled the ring off her finger, and squeezed it with all the might she could scrounge up in her current predicament. Her heart broke a little when she felt it give under pressure, and it's sides pushed together to form a nice, sharp little point to work with.

It took a while. The ring was small and she had to cut through a couple layers of the rope before her hands finally broke free. She quickly reached up to rip the tape off her mouth, and swallowed a shout of rage as the tender flesh around her lips screamed in protest. Without wasting time, she moved on to her ankles, making quick work of the ropes now that her hands were free.

Slowly, slowly she stood up, her body screaming in protest from being in too uncomfortable of a situation for too long. Now to get out of this stupid museum and hope her teacher didn't kill her for being gone so long.

She opened the door and slipped out, hoping no one was there to catch her. The cave was eerily quiet. No soft murmurs bounced off the rocky walls. No shuffling feet on the floor save for her own. She made her way down the hall, hoping against hope that she hadn't been in there for too long.

Half the torches that had lit up the place before were now extinguished, casting even creepier shadows than the last time she'd walked through. She slowly made her way towards the opening of the cave, her heart sinking. No one was here. She was alone.

Quickly she whipped out her cell, berating herself mentally for not looking at it earlier. She flipped it open and frowned. No reply from Hojou. Great. And it was now 11:15pm. The museum had long since closed down. She was stuck.

_Why the hell didn't Itou-sensei come looking for me?_ She thought. _Or Sango?_ Surely her friend would have noticed her absence. Quickly, she died Sango's number, placing the phone up to her ear.

She answered on the second ring. "Hello?"

"Sango!" A wave of relief washed over Kagome.

"Kagome! What the hell happened?" She asked, the same note of relief evident in her tone. "Hiromi told everyone you'd slipped out to meet Hojou, Itou-sensei was pissed.

Argh, stupid Hiromi, Kagome was going to kill her. "Sango, I didn't sneak out to see Hojou, Hiromi and her friends freaking jumped me in the bathroom."

_"What?"_ Sango shouted. Kagome moved the phone away from her ear so as not to go deaf. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, they just tied me up and threw me into the janitor's closet."

"And you've been in there all this time?" She asked. Then: "I guess I should have come looking for you myself."

"Gee, you think?" Kagome snapped, testier than she usually was. She let all the air out of her lungs. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be rude, I'm just not having a very good night so far." She said.

"Seriously. Want me to come and get you?"

"Ummm…." Kagome glanced around. She was in a museum. Midnight was fast approaching. She was closed in. "That might not be a good idea." She said. "The museum is closed, it's not like I can just walk out."

"I hadn't thought of that," Sango said, then cursed. "Well, why don't you just go to security and tell them what happened?"

"Are you kidding?" Kagome hissed into the phone. "No way they'll believe me! They'll think I'm just some stupid juvenile delinquent trying to steal one of these stupid artifacts! I have college to think about, I can't get a record!"

"Okay, calm down. Listen, just hide out somewhere for now. I'll be there first thing in the morning to come in and get you."

"Okay." Kagome said, loving Sango more and more every second. "Thank you."

"When I see Hiromi…" Sango replied, growling deep in her throat. She let the threat hang.

"You and me both." She couldn't help the smile that spread across her face.

After hanging up with Sango, and a promise that she'd bring something to eat with her when she came in the morning, Kagome looked around, trying to figure out her next move. It was cold in the cave, and it had been a warm, 80-degree day outside. She hadn't thought to bring a sweater along. Who knew she'd be jumped and hog-tied? She rubbed her hands quickly up and down her arms, trying to warm herself up. It was all she could do. Deciding that maybe finding somewhere a little warmer to hide in the museum would be a good idea, she made her way towards the stairs.

Something moved in the corner of her eye, and she whipped around to follow the movement.

Nothing was there except for the giant mirror. Oh, and her reflection. She rolled her eyes. _Don't freak yourself out, Kagome. It's just a stupid mirror_. She shrugged off the eerie feeling that tried to make its way up her spine and continued towards the stairs, slowly tip toeing up and up and up. When she reached the mouth of the cave she peeked around the corner, scanning the much more modern room. Just as she took a step out she saw the bobbing of a flashlight and the jangling of keys.

_Oh crap! Security!_ Without thinking twice she turned and hurried back down the stairs, searching for a place to hide. The only thing big enough in the room to conceal her was the mirror, which wasn't hanging, just leaning nicely propped up against the wall. Quickly she stepped over the red velvet ropes, ignoring the 'do not pass' sign, and dove behind the mirror. She tried to scrunch up into the smallest ball she could, and held her breath as the security guard ambled down the stairs she'd just come from.

He took what seemed like forever to make his sweep of the room, and then turned to go back and hopefully spend a lot of time checking out the rest of the building.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Kagome stepped out from behind the mirror and back over the ropes. She turned and bowed to whatever spirit was supposedly taking residence inside. "Sorry museum gods," she said, humoring herself. "I'll stay on this side of the ropes from now on. …Unless the guard comes back." She added after a thought. The she stepped back from the mirror and gave it a good look.

What was it about that mirror? She felt like it pulled her in, like an insect being drawn to a flame. She wasn't sure if it was the legend the guide had talked about or what, but Kagome felt unsettled and uneasy every time she looked at it. And it was kind of hard to look away. Sighing, figuring she was in for the long haul tonight, so she might as well entertain herself, she walked up to it and took a good look at herself.

Kagome knew she was pretty enough. Average in looks, killer in school, save for math, and she thought she had a decent personality. She leaned in closer, her chocolate brown eyes and fair skin striking a sharp contrast with the bluish-black color of the mirror.

She smiled, shrugged at herself, did a full turn, and instantly felt like she was the wicked stepmother in Snow White. Laughing at herself, thankful that no one was around to watch her acting so stupid, she walked up and placed her hands on the mirror.

"Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" She grinned, waiting for a reply.

"Dammit wench!" Came a deep, rough, angry voice. "Could you _be_ anymore vain?"

Kagome reared back let out an ear-splitting scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, comments and critiques are welcome. Hope you guys enjoyed! See you in the next chapter.
> 
> ~SugarRos


	3. Youkai In the Mirror

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a longer chapter than the others, but I couldn't find a good place to tie it off earlier. Enjoy!
> 
> Disclaimer: I wrote my first Inuyasha fanfiction 15 years ago. And still, I own none of the Inuyasha series or its characters. So sad.

Inuyasha

Inuyasha growled deep in his throat. Every day. Every fuckin' day it was the same damn thing. The people came and they stared up into the mirror, either with boredom or extreme interest. Their stupid, human faces doing their stupid, insignificant human stuff. Then they moved on and others stepped up to take their place.

They made him sick.

Just this afternoon another big group of children had come stomping through. He imagined what they'd do if he showed himself. Glaring out at them from inside his own, personal prison, he watched every human walk past. Burned their image into his brain.

He imagined what it would be like to walk among them. He'd watched, after all, for the last three hundred years as humans and Youkai alike changed over the centuries. How society had developed. He watched as he was passed from collectors' hand to collectors' hand. Sometimes he spent twenty years in one spot. Sometimes he spent only six months in another. But he was always trapped, always stuck in this stupid cell of his.

He spent the first hundred years of his entrapment going over and over in his head the events that led him to being captured, but after a while he got bored. He couldn't change what had happened. All he could do was plot his revenge.

Which is why when that bitch, that cursed priestess that had first entrapped him here three hundred years ago showed up in that group of students, rage had blinded him. He jumped up and stalked towards her. He'd almost shown himself.

Kikyou… He hissed to no one in particular. He watched as she gathered around with the rest of the humans, acting as if it was the first time she'd seen the blasted mirror. Acting like she wasn't the world's most powerful witch in all of history.

He didn't get it. What the fuck was she doing? She was playing some stupid game with him, he just couldn't figure out what. Wasn't it bad enough that she'd trapped him in the first place? Wasn't it enough that he was, basically, granting her immortality?

Of course, if it were up to him, she'd be dead. But Inuyasha, at this point, was used to not getting his way.

Which pissed him off even more.

He growled as Kikyou stepped closer to the mirror as the rest of the humans moved on. She was dressed in regular clothes. She wore her hair different. She had light makeup on. He braced himself, ready for whatever it was she was planning to do with him.

"Kagome!" Someone called. Kikyou whipped her head around and moved off towards the voice without even a backwards glance. He'd almost gone over the edge then.

Stupid bitch, what the fuck was she playing at? He'd kill her.

He watched her until she was out of his line of sight. He cursed the fact that he could only see so far in either direction outside of his cell.

Nothing to do now but wait. Why she decided to drop in early was beyond him. It was only the afternoon. He could tell by the number of tours that had passed by as he sat there, having nothing to do but count them. He waited. And waited. The group she had arrived with left, as did every other human throughout the rest of the day, but Kikyou never came back.

For a while he sat and wondered if he'd really seen her, or if he was actually starting to crack at this point. Three hundred years, after all, was a damn long time to be stuck in a magical mirror.

Just when he thought he was indeed, finally, going insane, she showed up again.

Inuyasha's ears perked up. He moved closer to the barrier, to the point just before he would be shown, and he watched her. She looked up at the mirror for a while. Not showing it any recognition at all. Again, Inuyasha fought the urge to show himself. He refused to do it until he knew what she was trying to do. He stayed hidden as she took one of those mechanical talking things out of her pocket and messed around with it, then put it up to her head.

He could hear her one-sided conversation. Being alive so long, living so many years as he did, he'd passed some of the boredom by studying the little details that had changed along the way. The contraption she was using was called a 'cell phone', and there was someone, somewhere talking into another 'cell phone' with the other half of the conversation.

At first when those little things started to appear he'd thought humans were going crazy, walking around and talking to themselves. Then he'd thought they were talking to people stuck in other dimensions, like he was. It was a while before he figured out that they used the contraptions to communicate over long distances. He longed to touch one for himself. To hold it in his hands and open it up and finally understand how they'd gotten voices to travel through the air so quickly.

It was only one of the many things that fascinated him about the current time.

He watched as she closed her phone and headed towards the entrance to the room. He wondered why she didn't give him the time of day. What the hell was she doing?

He watched as, again, she came into view. This time she was running, though, and her eyes were wide and she was breathing hard, and she was coming right at him.

Inuyasha growled, ready for her to finally acknowledge him. Instead, she hopped right over the velvet ropes that kept all the humans at bay and dove around the corner.

He opened his mouth. Unbelievable. What the hell was she doing now? Seconds later the sound of heavy steps approached, keys jangling, flashlight bobbing around, and it hit him. Kikyou was actually running from the guards. As if she was afraid of being seen.

Inuyasha scoffed. Was she out of her mind? Kikyou didn't run from mere humans, she wasn't afraid of being seen. She had no qualms about casting memory spells, or any other sort of spells that she thought would aid her in her mission. That was the whole reason she kept him in here, after all; the bitch.

Still trying to sort it all out he waited patiently as the guard strolled through the room, the flashlight bobbing over the mirror, circling the area. Deeming everything in order, he turned on his heels and moved on to the next section, leaving Inuyasha alone with a conniving, crazy priestess who was trying to trick him in some unfathomable way he just couldn't figure out.

Kikyou gingerly stepped into his vision again and breathed a visual sigh of relief. Then she turned to the mirror.

Ah-HA, he knew it. Whatever she was planning to do, she was going to do it now.

She bowed.

"Sorry museum gods," she said in a soft, low voice. "I'll stay on this side of the ropes from now on. …Unless the guard comes back."

His jaw dropped. What?! Was she kidding? Was she fucking kidding? He fisted his hands at his side and felt the anger boiling inside him. Thoughts of ripping her throat out danced through him. How dare she make fun of his entrapment! How dare she fool around like that!

He watched, stunned into silence, as Kikyou stepped back and looked the giant mirror up and down, paying close attention to the golden frame she'd inscribed the spell into herself. She sighed again, shrugged, and then finally, finally walked towards him. But she wasn't looking at him. No, she was checking herself out. She made one of those stupid kissy faces he'd seen girls make over and over during the decades, and she looked herself up and down, spinning in place, smiling at her reflection.

Inuyasha took a step back as she laughed. Laughed. He'd never heard Kikyou laugh before, not even one of those evil, maniacal laughs he'd have thought she'd develop over the centuries of not having a soul anymore.

This laugh was light and breezy and said she didn't have a care in the world. That she wasn't a three-hundred-year-old evil priestess with spells to cast and innocent hanyou to keep locked up inside mirrors and crap.

She leaned in then, and placed her hands on the mirror and said: "Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" Then she smiled.

Inuyasha snapped. "Dammit wench!" He yelled, stepping out to reveal himself. "Could you be anymore vain?"

He watched as her head fell back. As her eyes widened. As her mouth went slack. She inhaled sharply and then reared back and let out the most agonizing scream he'd ever heard.

He quickly flattened his sensitive ears against the assault, and he growled deep in his chest. "What the hell, wench, stop! Stop!"

She drew in anther deep breath and did it again, taking two or three steps back away from the mirror.

He had to clamp his hands over his ears this time. Dammit, what the hell was she doing? She was going to call the humans back. "Shut up!" He yelled.

She obeyed. Her mouth snapped shut and her body went rigid, her eyes still wide as saucers. Her chest rose and fell; he could hear her breathing quickly through her nose.

"Wha-" She stuttered, "What's going on? What are you?"

Inuyasha barred his teeth. "Stop playing games, you stupid bitch."

Her mouth fell open. "I don't- I mean, I'm not…." She shook her head, as if she couldn't believe what she was looking at. "What are you?" She repeated.

"I'm not playing along, Kikyou." He spat. "It's almost midnight, just get the stupid spell over with."

"Wha- what spell?"

He let out a roar then; felt it pour out of him. She made him so mad. The way she cowered gave him a little thrill. She was scared of him? Good. It was about damn time. "You know what spell. I don't know what you're playing at, but I'm not humoring you. Just get it over with." He frowned. "Where's the rest of your zombie posse, anyway? It's not like you to travel alone. Even to see little ol' me."

She shook her head again, her hair swishing around past her shoulders. He realized then why her hair was so different. It was shorter. "What the hell did you do to you hair?" He bit out. "It looks terrible!"

She jerked back as if she'd been slapped and her hand reached up to self-consciously touch her hair. "I- I've always had it this way!" She said, shaking her head again.

"Whatever," growled Inuyasha, "just get the spell done with, I'm bored of this conversation. Also, I hate you." He added for good measure.

His ears twitched when he heard the hysterical-like laughter bubble out of her. Her hands came up to cover her mouth as she continued to giggle into them.

"I get it!" She said, throwing her head back and laughing some more. "This is a dream. It has to be. I'm still tied up in the janitor's closet. Hiromi knocked me out after she threw me in and I'm still in there, dreaming." She started to pace back and forth in front of the mirror.

Inuyasha growled. "You're not dreaming."

"No?" She asked, turning on him. "What do you call this then?" She waved her hand over her head. "This is crazy. This is not real. You," she pointed a finger at him, "are not real."

He bared his teeth. "I'm as real as you bitch." He said. "I'm also as real as security coming back to see what all the commotion is about."

She whipped her head around to the stairs. "I don't hear anyone."

Inuyasha pointed to his ears. "Excellent hearing, but you knew that already."

Her eyes shot up to his ears, and she looked shocked all over again, as if she hadn't noticed them poking out from the top of his head the last million times she'd seen him.

"If this is a dream…" she said, "then they won't see me, or they'll leave me alone."

"Well," Inuyasha said, glaring down at her as he began to step back into his cell, "Just spell them to forget. It's not like you haven't done it before." And then he was all the way back, invisible once more.

"Wait!" Kikyou cried, pressing her hands against the glass again. "Where did you go? Where did you-?" She snapped her head around, finally hearing the guards approaching herself, and Inuyasha watched as she quickly hurried behind the mirror again.

"I'm tellin' you Shou," Inuyasha whipped his ears around to catch the guard's conversation. "It came from down here."

"Whatever man, you're just scaring yourself. No one is here."

"I heard it though. Two screams and a shout of rage."

"We'll let's look around and then get back to the desk. I've got my dinner on the way, I don't want to miss the delivery boy."

Inuyasha watched as they circled the room and came up empty. They left, the smaller one taking one last sweep with his flashlight, his eyes narrowed, before disappearing back up the steps.

"I don't get it," Inuyasha said, showing himself again. He leaned his forearm against the glass and waited for her to come out of her hiding spot. "Why didn't you just spell them?"

He heard a grunt as she emerged from behind the mirror. "I don't know what you're talking about, I can't 'spell' people, what do I look like, a witch?"

"You look like yourself, Kikyou." He rolled his eyes.

"You keep calling me that," Kikyou said, brushing dust off her shoulders and out of her hair, "but my name isn't Kikyou. It's Kagome."

His eyes narrowed. "It doesn't matter what you call yourself now, you'll always be Kikyou to me, the evil little bitch who trapped me in here."

"I am not a bitch, and my name is not Kikyou. It's Kagome. Ka. Go. Me. You have me confused with someone else."

"I'd never confuse the face of the woman who ensnared me." He spat.

"Well you obviously have because I'm not her." She spat back.

"I hate you." He said.

Her eyebrows knotted together, and she walked right up to the glass, tilting her head back and glowering at him. "Listen up." She said. "I don't know who you are, and I don't know what you think I've done, but I've never so much as laid eyes on you before. I've never been inside this museum and I've never trapped anybody! What I have done is been jumped by a gang of girls, tied up, thrown into a closet and now I have a concussion or something, because that's the only reasonable explanation for what is happening to me!"

Inuyasha stared down at her as she finished her tirade. He'd gotten a good whiff of her half-way through and his mind had crawled almost to a stop.

What. The. Fuck.

That wasn't Kikyou. The girl looked like Kikyou. Her hair color was Kikyou's hair color and her skin was Kikyou's skin and her size and shape were all Kikyou's. But it wasn't her. She smelled wrong. This girl didn't smell like death and dirt and old bones. She smelled alive and flowery and human.

Holy shit, she'd been telling him the truth. This girl, this Kagome, as she called herself, wasn't Kikyou. He'd shown himself to a human.

"Fuck." He said.

"I know!" The girl named Kagome wailed. "And it's not even my fault!" She continued, unaware that Inuyasha had realized anything. "Hojou liked me, he asked me out, he started it, if Hiromi should be mad at anyone it should be Hojou!"

"You're not her." Inuyasha growled.

"What?"

He watched her step back and realize that he wasn't talking about whatever stupid thing she'd been going on about.

"Oh, Kikyou. Yes, that's right, I'm not her. I'm Kagome."

"Fuck!" He said again.

Kagome frowned. "You sure curse a lot. It's not very polite."

But Inuyasha couldn't hear her. His heart was lodged in his throat. Adrenaline coursed through him. This was his chance. If he could just get this Kagome girl to draw him out of the damned mirror he'd be able to find a way out of his entrapment, sooner or later.

He tried to hide his grin. He knelt down so he could look the Kikyou-look-alike straight in the eyes. If he was going to be successful he'd have to do this right. "Kagome." He said, his voice softening. She took a half a step back, but her eyes locked on to his, and they didn't waver once. "I need you to help me."

Her back stiffened.

"I need you to get me out of here. I've been in here for a really long time, and the witch who trapped me here is coming soon. Can you help me?"

Her eyes narrowed. "Aren't you a youkai? The guide lady said that you tried to destroy the world three hundred years ago."

Inuyasha kept his face tightly controlled, even though what he really wanted to do was bare his teeth and let out a growl. "I'm not a youkai, I'm a hanyou." He said, keeping his voice soft. "I'm half youkai and half human. Like you."

Kagome leaned in close, her eyes wide again. "Why did this Kikyou girl trap you inside?"

He couldn't help the growl that made its way out this time. He had to give credit to Kagome though, she held her ground. "Does it matter?" He asked.

"Of course it does. You could kill me if I let you out."

He cocked his head to the side and smiled. He drew that smile out slowly, lazy-like, and stared right into her. "Kagome," he said, "I could kill you, it's true. But this is a dream. And since this is your dream, do you think I'd be more likely to kill you, or more likely to kiss you?"

A slow blush crept up her neck and blossomed over her cheeks. Her eyes darted down, and then back to his again.

Inuyasha had played his cards right, and he knew it. Kagome was a romantic. Good, that would make things so much easier.

"Um," she said, a hint of shyness now in her voice. "What do I have to do?"

"You have to kiss me," he said, his voice so low she was forced to lean closer to him. "Press your lips against the mirror, Kagome."

She inhaled sharply, and he could smell the change in her. Smell the blood pumping quickly through her, the way her body warmed to him. She leaned in, her eyes stuck to his. Slowly, slowly, centimeter by centimeter she moved closer, her eyes closing as she pressed her lips against the mirror.

Inuyasha swallowed a shout of triumph as he quickly pressed his lips against hers on the other side of the mirror. At first all he felt was glass, cold and hard and unforgiving. And then her lips were on his, and he felt a tug, a soft, insistent pull against his body, navigating him out of his prison.

His head was free now, his shoulders, then his hands.

He had every intention of killing this girl. Every. Intention.

But her lips were velvety soft against him, hot and electrifying. She opened her mouth to him, inviting him in, and before he was aware of his actions, he took his clawed hands and buried them into her hair, wrapping his fingers around the soft strands and deepening the kiss as he stepped fully out of the mirror.

He pulled her flush to him, a growl rumbling in his throat. She let out a moan of her own.

Fuck, it felt so good to hold her. To touch her. He hadn't realized how much he'd longed for the feel of a woman. It had been three hundred years since he'd kissed anyone, and he was now determined to make up for it. He mumbled something, he didn't know what, he was too focused on her lips, on her tongue, on her breasts pressed up against him.

His hands left her hair and moved to her waist, picking her up. She wrapped her legs around him and he groaned against her, turning them around and pushing her back up against the mirror. He nipped at her tongue, at her lips. He trailed hot kisses down her chin, her throat, nipping at her soft flesh.

"Oh god," she breathed, and she bucked against him.

He growled again. She wanted it rough? He could give it to her rough. He found her mouth again and ground his hips against her. He felt himself straining against his clothing. He needed to get her naked and finally, finally get the release he hadn't had in centuries.

Then he could kill her.

He moved his hands to her shirt, ripped the flimsy clothing down the front and let out a little whine to see she had another smaller, tighter piece of clothing underneath. He moved to rip that one open too, but suddenly, he could smell her.

He dropped Kagome on her feet and turned around in a flash, his back to her, pressing her between himself and the mirror.

"Kikyou," he growled.

In a flicker of light and the barest hint of wind, she appeared. Looking as she always looked. Regal, priestessly, her nose up and her mouth tight. She was beautiful. And looking at her now, he wondered why he thought the other girl was her twin.

They looked damned alike, that was still true. But Kikyou had an air about her that the other girl just didn't possess.

"Well," Kikyou said, her voice like satin. The corners of her lips turned up into an icy smile. "What do we have here?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review, I'm serious about my writing and my stories, and if you have anything to comment about or anything to mention or anything to say, I would love to hear it.
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed! See you in the next chapter.


	4. Kikyou's Spell

Kagome

He was a God.

At least, that was Kagome's first thought, after she finished screaming.

He was tall, with long, flowing silver-while hair, large golden eyes, and a powerful build. He wore only a hakama, his chiseled chest was bare, and two little, fluffy white ears sat atop his head.

Her second thought was she'd lost it. What the heck was going on? Gods didn't show themselves to humans. Only crazy people talked to Gods.

Then she'd remembered the museum guide's story. He wasn't a God, he was a _youkai_.

And that's when Kagome realized she was dreaming. Because if there was anything crazier than a God coming out of a mirror and talking to her, it was a youkai coming out of a mirror and talking to her.

It was a good thing she was dreaming, because otherwise she'd think she was going insane. Dreams she could deal with. Insanity was not an option for her.

Still, for a dream it felt so _real_. The youkai glared down at her from inside the mirror, pacing back and forth, growling, his arms flexing with power as he clenched and unclenched his fists. He'd called her _Kikyou_ , and insisted she was trying to trick him in some way, pretending to be someone she wasn't.

He pushed at her nerves, calling her names, yelling at her. He'd actually told her he _hated_ her, and that's when she'd snapped.

 _No one_ should hate her, she hadn't done anything wrong! And yet today everybody seemed to be blaming her for _everything_. Dream or no dream, she was sick of it.

Steeling her nerves, Kagome walked right up to the mirror, and tilted her hand back to look into his eyes. She knotted her brows together, giving him her best I'm-not-taking-anymore-crap face. And then she laid into him.

Oh, she gave it to him good. He wasn't getting away with it. Not like Hiromi had.

"-What I _have_ done, is been jumped by a gang of girls, tied up, and thrown into a closet! And now I have a concussion or something, because that's the only reasonable explanation for what is happening to me!" She finished her rant, breathing hard. If he hadn't been hiding behind all that glass she would have slugged him… maybe. He looked like he might be the kinda guy who slugged back.

That's when she'd noticed the change in his demeanor. Sometime during her speech his eyes had widened, like he was actually seeing _her_ for the first time.

"Fuck," he said.

Oh thank Gods, he understood! She was having the worst night of her life. "I _know_!" She cried, happy that he agreed her night had sucked. "And it's not even my fault! Hojou _liked_ me, he asked me out, and he started it! If Hiromi should be mad at anyone, it should be Hojou!"

"You're not her." The youkai said then.

Kagome snapped her eyes to his again. "What?" Then she realized, duh, he wasn't talking about her bad night. He'd finally figured out that she'd been telling the truth. She wasn't whoever this 'Kikyou' person was. That girl sounded horrid! Kagome was nice, everyone knew that. "Oh, Kikyou." She said. "Yes, that's right, I'm not her. I'm Kagome."

"Fuck!" He said again.

Was it really that bad of a thing? The youkai should have been _happy_ that she wasn't Kikyou. She frowned. "You sure curse a lot. It's not very polite." She watched as his demeanor changed from threatening to confused, then settling on something that looked like….

Confidence, she decided.

And it looked _really_ good on him.

Kagome shook her head, trying to clear any thoughts about him _that way_ from her mind. She liked Hojou, and she didn't want anything to ruin that. _Although technically,_ her brain nudged her, _this is a dream. And there's nothing wrong with dreaming about sexy youkai_. And sexy was the correct word for what the youkai was. Sexy hadn't had a meaning until she'd laid eyes on him.

Her musings were interrupted when he knelt down in the mirror. He was barefoot, and he placed his hands, each finger tipped with beautiful, strong, sharp nails, down next to his feet, sitting on his haunches. He seemed to relax all of a sudden. The anger that had radiated from every muscled inch of him was suddenly gone, dissipated like it had never been there in the first place.

"Kagome," he said, his voice low and soft. Like velvet. Or butter. The way he spoke her name rolled over her, and she felt her body clutch on the inside. She looked into his eyes, and they burned into her, molten gold. She couldn't look away. His eyes held her. "I need you to help me," he said.

A chill went up her spine, but Kagome couldn't tell if it was because he turned her on so much, or if her body was warning her.

He oozed danger, just as much as he oozed sex appeal.

This was probably the best dream Kagome had ever had in her entire life.

"I need you to get me out of here," he continued, in that beautifully rough voice of his. "I've been in here for a really long time, and the witch who trapped me here is coming soon. Can you help me?"

She was playing with fire, she knew. She could sense how powerful he was, even while she was dreaming. "Aren't you a youkai?" she asked, fully aware of how breathy her voice had become. "The guide lady said you tried to destroy the world three hundred years ago." She saw the muscle in his jaw clench.

"I'm not a youkai, I'm a hanyou. I'm half youkai and half _human_. Like you."

 _Like me!_ Kagome's brain whispered. Whatever half he was, he was delicious. How had her subconscious conjured up such a creature? He was so beautiful. She felt trapped. Ensnared. Glued to his golden eyes. She leaned in closer to him. She couldn't help it. "Why did this Kikyou girl trap you inside?" She asked, willing herself not to get totally lost within those eyes.

He growled, and it was as terrifying as it was utterly alluring. She wanted to step back, but she held her ground, entranced.

"Does it matter?" He asked.

"Of course it does," she breathed. It didn't though, not really. "You could kill me if I let you out." She watched as his head cocked slowly to the side, and he smiled. It spread across his face slowly, as if he were deliberately making her wait for it.

"Kagome," he said, "I _could_ kill you, it's true. But this is a dream. And since this is _your_ dream, do you think I'd be more likely to kill you, or more likely to _kiss_ you?"

That was it. With those words he had her, and she knew it. She felt the blush spread across her face, felt her insides quiver deliciously. This _was_ a dream, dammit, and she wanted to enjoy it. She needed to know, on some primitive level, what it would be like to kiss him. Would it be like the kiss Hojou had given her? Would it be better? Kagome was a virgin, although she'd had a few boyfriends before. For some reason this dream-youkai… no, wait, dream- _hanyou…_ spoke to her inner lust like nothing else, dreaming or awake, ever had before.

"Um," she said, fully aware that she was shaking for _need_ of him. "What do I have to do?"

He dropped his voice, forcing her to lean closer to him. "Press your lips against the mirror, Kagome." It was a demand, spoken in velvet. One she would follow no matter what.

She moved towards him, her hands on the glass to steady herself. His golden eyes held her as she leaned in, closer and closer, until finally, her eyes closed and she pressed her lips against the mirror.

The glass was cold and hard, but she kept them there, hoping that something would happen; that this God-like hanyou creature would show her what kissing was _really_ supposed to be like.

His lips were on hers then. One moment there was glass, and the next, there was _him_ , and instantly she felt heat spread through her. Eyes closed, afraid that he would disappear if she opened them, she parted to lips to invite him in.

What could happen to her, after all, in a dream?

And he took her invitation, wrapping his hands in her hair, pulling her to him, pressing up flush against her. He deepened the kiss, and it was electrifying. She felt like her world had opened up, had expanded to overwhelm her in new sensations. She had kissed boys before, but she had never been _kissed_ by boys before. Not like this. The hanyou kissed her like she was his lifeline, as if he couldn't get enough, and she felt the same. She would die if he stopped.

Her growled then, into her lips. She felt it rumble from deep inside his chest and she answered him in her own way, letting him know that in her dream, in this fantasy she was having, she wanted him to do all the things to her that she'd read about in romance novels and seen in movies, but had yet to find in anyone.

Even Hojou.

He mumbled something then, something she couldn't quite make out, and he lifted her by her waist and she took his cue and wrapped her legs around his hips. He was _strong_. She felt feather-light in his arms. He had no problem turning her around and pressing her against the mirror

He nipped at her. Playing with her with his kisses, biting and tugging at her lower lip. Kagome didn't know what came over her. She was unbidden, unhinged. The hanyou trailed heated kisses down her chin, her throat, finding places to kiss and nip that made her insides melt.

"Oh God," she said, and she ground her hips against him, shuddering, inhaling sharply at the intense shot of arousal it created.

She'd heard of wet dreams before, but she'd never had them.

They were _awesome_.

He growled again, and it awoke something in her. When he found her lips this time he crushed against her. It was intense, needy, _rough_. She felt him against her, their clothes in the way. _Too many clothes_ , she thought, almost in a panic. This dream could end any moment and she didn't want to wake up before she got what her body was crying out for.

He moved his lips from hers then, and she whimpered at the loss of him, but his eyes were on fire now. He tore her shirt open, revealing the tank-top underneath. He reached for that too, and Kagome, who had never before in her life scratched the surface on arousal such as this, _wanted_ him to.

But he didn't tear her tank-top. He froze instead, and quicker than she'd seen anyone move in her life, he dropped her lightly on her feet and spun.

Kagome blinked at the toned muscles of his back, watching them tighten. What the heck happened? He still had her pressed up against the mirror.

" _Kikyou,_ " he growled.

And then she was there. It was crazy. Kikyou appeared almost like the hanyou had appeared, but not, because there was nothing there for her to appear _in_. One moment nothing was there, and the next moment _she was_.

 _My imagination is in top form_ , Kagome thought. Was everyone in her dream going to be so utterly beautiful? She felt bland in comparison. How had the hanyou confused her with this woman?

Kikyou was regal. She was otherworldly. Tall and thin, with long, flowing black-as-night hair and deep, dark blue eyes that seemed to shimmer as she looked Kagome and the hanyou over.

"Well," she said, as her red lips pulled into the barest hint of a smile. "What do we have here?"

Kagome should be cowering, she knew. She should look away. There was something not right about the woman in front of her, floating in the air. But just like her gaze had been glued to the hanyou, she could not bring herself to look away from Kikyou.

Kikyou turned her attention to the hanyou. "Who is this girl, Inuyasha?" She asked. "How did you get her to set you free?"

The hanyou, Inuyasha – _what a strange name_ , Kagome thought – growled, and he pressed Kagome back into the mirror a little bit more. She had to crane her neck to look around his arm, so she could keep looking at Kikyou.

"She's no one of importance." He said.

"She doesn't look like no one of importance." And with that, Kikyou snapped her fingers, and Kagome felt a soft _pull_ focused around her chest, and before she knew it, she'd stepped from behind Inuyasha's back and was now standing right in front of the priestess.

"I'll ask you again, Inuyaha," Kikyo said, keeping her eyes on Kagome. She felt like an insect under a microscope. "How did you get her to set you free?"

Kagome couldn't see him, couldn't tear her gaze from Kikyou, but she heard the shrug in his voice, the nonchalance that took residence in his words. "She was just there, bitch. I got lucky, that's all."

"Lucky. Hmm."

This dream had gone from awesome to horrible in two seconds flat. Other than having no idea what the two were talking about, she didn't like not having control of her body, not this way. This wasn't the unnerving lack of control she'd had when Inuyasha was kissing her. This was the unnerving lack of control of not being able to move her arms and legs by herself.

"It doesn't matter," Kikyou replied, waving her hand. She sounded bored, like Kagome being there was of no importance. "Midnight is upon us. I must weave the spell." Her eyes moved from Kagome then, and Kagome felt her body turn so she too could see Inuyasha. She watched as he bared his teeth, eyes darting from Kikyou to Kagome and then back to Kikyou again, before he turned and took a step into the mirror.

He froze, turned his head, and looked Kikyou square in the eye. "Don't hurt her, Kikyou," he said, and Kagome felt another chill go up her spine. He was deadly, she saw it in his eyes. "She's just a girl, she doesn't have anything to do with this."

"Inside the mirror, Inuyasha," Kikyou insisted, and with one hesitant look back at Kagome, he obeyed.

Something about his eyes, something about his body language, made Kagome's heart break. It was like he was a broken puppy, going back into his cage. When the mirror had again enveloped him, Inuyasha turned, leaned his forearm against the glass and locked his eyes onto hers.

"Hold her." Kikyou said, and with the smallest gust of wind, a man appeared behind Kagome. She couldn't see him, but his hands wrapped around her arms, holding her in place. She didn't understand what for, it wasn't like she had control of her body anyway.

The priestess started to chant then, and the stagnant air around them kicked up and brushed against them, whipping Kagome's hair into her face. The language was one Kagome was not familiar with, and as she spoke, the frame around the mirror glowed, the etched letters and symbols pulled away from the mirror, and then slowly, as the wind died down, pushed back into their place.

Inuyasha didn't look like he was in trouble. He didn't look like he was in pain from the spell. Mostly, he just looked bored. Kagome wondered what the spell did, other than keep him locked inside.

Kikyou's feet touched the ground then, and she walked slowly up to the mirror, putting her hand against the glass.

"I cannot let you out, Inuyasha. You know I cannot allow you to escape."

"I know," he bit out, eyebrows drawn together in anger.

"You hate me," she said. Kagome noted a hint of sadness in her voice.

Inuyasha didn't speak for a moment, then he sighed. "I do," he said. "You're not the woman I fell in love with."

"You're right, I'm not," she agreed, her hand steady on the glass. "You had a choice and you chose wrong. For the sake of the world, for the sake of humanity, I had to do what I had to do."

"And look at you now," he said, bitterness seeping into his words. "You're an abomination. You should not be alive. Yet here you are, with growing power. It spills over the brim. You're enjoying it far too much."

She laughed then, unfeeling and cold. "You're right Inuyasha, I do enjoy it," she said. "And now that you've found my doppelganger, I will be enjoying my power for many, many more years."

Kagome saw his eyes widen. He stiffened, his back locking upright into place. "Wait. Kikyou wait!" He shouted. His gaze was fearful now as they locked onto her. She felt her stomach drop as Kikyou turned and made her way towards her. She stopped a few feet away, ignoring Inuyasha's demands to leave her alone, ignoring his pounding on the glass. She looked down at Kagome, reached out a hand and gripped her below the chin.

"Don't worry," she said. "It will only hurt for a few seconds. I promise." Then her eyes darted up to the man holding onto her arms. "It's above her right hip. Rip it out of her."

And before Kagome could ask what she meant, the man whipped her around, and she saw a blur of black hair and deep purple cloth before a pain so intense she cried out slammed into her.

She looked down, stunned, as blood pooled around the wound in her side. She looked up at the man, his handsome face unsmiling. In his bandaged hand he held a pink, shimmering jewel, perfectly round and about the size of a glass eyeball.

"What…?" She managed to get out, before Kikyou started to chant again, and the jewel rose into the air, high above her head, and a screeching noise, like claws on a chalkboard, ripped through Kagome. The jewel shattered into pieces and disappeared.

"It's done," Kikyou said. But Kagome was as confused as ever. What the hell was that jewel, and why the hell had it been _inside_ her?

Kikyou turned to her again, her smile soft this time. "Poor little human, getting caught up in this mess. Do not worry child, I will weave a spell so that you will forget. Be at peace."

Terrified now, Kagome glanced at Inuyasha, the hanyou in the mirror, but he wasn't shouting anymore, he wasn't pounding against the glass. He looked defeated. His golden eyes were the last thing she saw as she slipped into unconsciousness.


	5. Kagome's Memory

Kagome

"Kagome!"

Kagome's eyes flew open.

Her head hurt. Her body hurt. And she was freezing. The sky was a light violet color, a touch of the night making way for the sunrise. Sango filled her line of sight, her worried eyes darting over her as if she wasn't sure if her friend was alive or not.

"Kagome, can you hear me? Are you okay?" She felt Sango's hands grip onto her arms and give her a shake.

"Um… I'm fine…" Kagome said, her voice a bit hoarse. "...Where am I?" She asked. The last thing she remembered… The last thing…

"You're outside. Kagome, how the hell did you get out here? The museum hasn't even opened yet. And why are you sleeping on a bench?"

Kagome sat up slowly from the makeshift bed and tried to think back. The last thing she remembered was breaking out of the closet. She remembered walking through the cave in the museum, then hiding from security, and then…. Then what?

"Um…" She said again, trying to clear the sluggishness from her brain. She felt like she had a hangover, like she'd drank too much beer at a house party. "I don't know, I was hiding from the guards, and then-"

"Well, what happened to your shirt?" Sango asked, holding the ripped piece of clothing in her hands. She bunched it up in her fist. "Did Hiromi do this to you?"

Kagome hadn't thought that at first, but once Sango suggested it, she realized it must be true. Hiromi had ripped her shirt open while she was being tied up, before she'd been thrown in the closet. That's exactly what had happened, she was sure of it now.

"Yeah," she said, rubbing her eyes against the palms of her hands. Why was her brain so sluggish? "Yeah, it was Hiromi."

Sango sighed, shaking her head. "I'm going to kill her, I swear." She helped Kagome to her feet. "You okay? You look like you're frozen solid."

Kagome nodded slowly. Her head ached, and there was a sharp pain in her side, like something was stabbing into her. She looked down quickly, felt around the area right above her hip, but nothing was amiss. Something must have been digging into her side as she slept.

"Let's get back to my place, it's closer." Sango said. "I covered for you with your mom, told her you spent the night. You can borrow my clothes."

"Okay," Kagome said, willing to let Sango take control. She felt off some how, like a part of her was being left behind on that bench she'd slept on.

Why couldn't she remember what had happened? She ran and hid from the guard…. She hid from the guard and then….

Something must have happened. Maybe they found her. Maybe the guards found her hiding spot and threw her outside.

Once Kagome thought it, she realized that it was true. The guards did find her and they did throw her outside. And she must have been so tired that she just fell asleep on the closest bed-like structure around.

Once she realized these facts, she wondered how she could have forgotten them in the first place.

"Come on Kagome, we have to clean you up for school. We don't want Hiromi to come back and see you like this. You look a mess." Sango said, leading the way.

Kagome trailed behind, letting Sango take control as she solidified the night's events in her head.

.

.

Kagome felt a bit better by mid-day. Her body didn't ache so badly, except for that one insistent spot above her hip, and her head wasn't throbbing so much, although her brain still felt a bit foggy. Sango had been an awesome best friend as always, loaning Kagome some of her clothes and letting her use her makeup, although she had a distinct lack of lighter eye shadow shades. Kagome opted for the simple use of eyeliner and mascara. She felt almost like herself.

Almost.

History class had been awkward. Kagome kept her head low and ignored Hiromi and her friends, who luckily sat on the other side of the room. But while she could avoid Hiromi easily enough, she could not avoid Itou-sensei. He pulled her aside after class.

"Higurashi-san," he said, his serious eyes shaming her good. "How could you skip out of the field trip like that?"

"I'm – I'm very sorry Itou-sensei. I was in the bathroom for a while, and then…" Kagome let her words hang, hating herself for lying to him. "I didn't feel so well. Feminine issues. I went home."

He looked down at her from behind his reading glasses and a small smile spread across his face. "I like you, Higurashi-san. I know that history is not your favorite subject, but you do try hard, and you're very studious." He stood up and walked behind his teaching desk. "Some girls from class told me that you snuck off to see Hojou-san, but I spoke to him, and I'm happy to hear that your story is consistent with his."

Kagome felt a wave of relief wash over her. Thank goodness Hojou hadn't lied for her. She would have been done for.

"So now let's talk about your punishment," he continued.

"My punishment?" She asked. Shoot, and she thought she'd gotten off scott-free.

"I want you to do a paper on one of the artifacts we saw yesterday. You can pick any item the guide discussed with the class. I need 5,000 words due next week. Can you do it?"

Kagome nodded. As long as she was forgiven. She shifted nervously in front of his desk. "I know which one I want to do it on."

"Already? That was quick. Which one?"

"The one with the Legend about the Youkai in the Mirror. With the priestess. I'd like to do that one,"

Itou-sensei sat down in his chair, leaning back, curiosity shining in his eyes. "Really? Why that one?"

Kagome shrugged. She wasn't too sure herself, except that mirror, for some reason, stuck out in her mind as being important. "I'm not sure, exactly. I think… I think I had a dream about it." She finally said, trying to clear her way through her cloudy thoughts. "There's something about it, I just… feel drawn to it, I guess."

The smile returned to Itou-sensei's face. "There's hope for you and history yet, Higurashi-san." He paused, then: "Okay, off to lunch with you. And Higurashi," he said as she turned to leave. "Next time, let me know what's going on. Feminine issues or not."

"Yes sir!" She said, smiling, and hurried out of the room before he laid another extra-credit assignment on her. Sango was waiting for her in the cafeteria, and after inching her way through the lunch line, she sat down next to her best friend.

"Was he super pissed?" Sango asked, taking a bite of her pizza.

"Not really." Kagome said, smiling a little. "I mean, he wasn't happy, but he's making me to an extra paper about that mirror we saw in the museum yesterday to make up for it."

"The one with the legend about spells and witches and whatnot?"

"She was a priestess, not a witch," She corrected.

Sango rolled her eyes. "Whatever. At least he gave you something interesting to work on, that mirror was kind of cool, and there was something about it. It was hard to look away, you know?"

Kagome nodded as she opened a catsup packet and poured it over her fries. Sango raised a skeptic eyebrow.

"What?" Kagome asked.

"I thought you were on a diet."

She waved her friend's words away with her hand. "I was, but now that Hojou has asked me out, officially, I can go back to enjoying french fries and mashed potatoes." She grinned wickedly and popped one of the delicious fries in her mouth.

Sango shook her head. "Don't blame me when he dumps you for getting pudgy."

"Worry about your own weight." Kagome said, sticking her tongue out. "And speaking of Hojou," she licked some catsup off her finger, changing the subject, "Itou-sensei asked him if I snuck off to meet him like Hiromi said. Saved my butt when our stories matched up."

Her friend narrowed her eyes. "You didn't tell him what really happened? With Hiromi?"

She shook her head. "No way. What's Itou-sensei going to do, give her a rap on the back of her hand? No, we have to plot our revenge on Hiromi ourselves."

Sango grinned. "I like the sound of that." Her eyes flicked up and to the left of Kagome then. "Incoming," she muttered, and from the way she smiled, Kagome could tell that it was Hojou walking their way.

"Hey girls." Hojou said, his usual cheery self as he plopped down next to Kagome. "Hey you," he said, just to her, his voice dropping.

"Hi." She replied. She couldn't help the grin that spread across her face, remembering their first date two nights ago.

"So about that text you sent me…" He said, propping his elbow on the table, and his head in his hand.

Kagome's face immediately drained of color. How could she have forgotten that horrible text Hiromi sent from her phone! She opened her mouth, hoping a plausible excuse would bubble somewhat coherently out of her.

"Oh, Kagome didn't tell you?" Sango swooped in, saving the day as usual. "Hiromi paid her a little visit yesterday in the museum."

He tilted his head, glancing from her to Sango, and back to her again.

"Tell him," Sango urged.

Kagome nodded. "Hiromi and her friends caught up to me in the bathroom last night. They-"

"They tied her up and threw her in janitor's closet!" Sango hissed, interrupting her. "But not before sending you that hate-text," she added. "She was stuck in that damn museum all night!"

Hojou's eyebrows shot up. He whistled. "You're kidding." He turned his gaze onto Kagome's eyes, and she wished with all her might that he'd believe her. "Are you okay?" He asked, eyes worried. "I thought that text was pretty out of left-field. It didn't sound like you, which is why I didn't reply."

Kagome shrugged. "It wasn't that big of a deal, Hojou," she said, nervously fidgeting with her hair. "I mean, everyone knows that Hiromi has a thing for you, I just didn't know she was crazy enough to do something so extreme. I've never been bullied like that before."

His hand shot out and grabbed onto Kagome's then. He squeezed her fingers together. "I am so sorry she did that to you. I've been trying to ignore her advances, but she's taken things too far." He absentmindedly brushed her hair out of her eyes. A grin spread across his face. "I know how to handle it."

"How?" Sango asked, leaning in and eager to be a part of it.

Hojou leaned in and gave Kagome a kiss – a light one, just a peck on the lips – before standing up from the lunch table. "Can you meet me out front after school?" He asked. At Kagome's nod, he ruffled her hair affectionately. "I had fun on our date, Kagome, try not to let Hiromi get you down. Can't wait to hang out tonight. See you after school." With that, the girls watched Hojou walk back to his seat at his regular lunch table with his friends.

"God, he's nice." Sango said. "Seriously Kagome, you picked a good one. Handsome, caring, and apparently, he doesn't do much for high school drama. He's a keeper."

"Mmhmm," Kagome said, agreeing on the surface. What she didn't say was that something was different about Hojou this time. She hadn't felt that same, giddy excitement when he'd kissed her as she had before. She squirmed in her seat, feeling out of sorts and uneasy. "What do you think he's going to do after school?"

Sango shrugged. "Whatever it is, I don't want to miss it." She threw a wink her best friend's way.

.

.

Math was the last class of the day, and it was horrid. Between math being her absolute worst subject, and Hiromi glaring daggers at the back of her head the whole time, Kagome couldn't take much more. The relief that washed over her when the final bell rang was almost staggering. She didn't hang around to chat with her classmates like she usually did. She made her way straight to her locker, grabbing what she needed to complete her homework for the night, and then booked it to meet Hojou.

She hadn't made it outside yet when she realized that Hiromi and her gang of friends were following her.

Just perfect.

Kagome burst through the double doors of the school building, willing herself not to run. She would not show her fear to these girls. Once they smelled fear, she'd be done for. She forced herself to keep her pace even as she made her way to the meeting place.

He wasn't there when she arrived of course. Disheartened, Kagome turned on her heel to face the oncoming storm.

Hiromi and her friends stopped a few feet away.

This moment felt so surreal to Kagome. She'd always been a big advocate against bullying. She had no problem sticking up for girls who were victims. But she had never been bullied herself. People were gathering, interested in the scene about to take place. Not one person looked to step up at help her out. Hojou was nowhere in sight. Neither was Sango. It was one thing to stand up and shame bullies who were picking on someone else. It was another thing entirely to stand up for yourself. Kagome steeled her resolve and locked her eyes onto Hiromi.

"How'd you get out, Higurashi?" Hiromi asked, lips pulled back into that same stupid sneer.

She tried to relax her posture, to give out a calm, nonchalant vibe. "Did you think tying me up and throwing me into a closet would hold me?"

The insults came then, calling her out on her virtue in every way possible. Kagome clenched her jaw against slinging insults back. She didn't want to escalate anything. She stood stalk-still as Hiromi's friends surround her, cut her off from the bystanders. Hiromi stepped closer. Then took another step. Kagome forced herself to stand still, to not take a step back.

"I'm going to ruin that pretty face of yours, Higurashi," Hiromi said, taking another step. "That way Hojou will want to vomit every time he looks at you."

Kagome had no formal training when it came to fighting. The last time she'd punched somebody was in first grade, and she'd been so scared she cried afterwards. Still, her hands fisted at her sides, read to give as good as she got.

Hojou had the best timing in the whole world, because that's the moment he stepped through the crowd and moved to Kagome's side. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and drew her to him. "Hey Hiromi," he said, his voice cheery as usual. "What's going on?"

Hiromi froze, her eyes narrowing as they darted between Hojou and Kagome. "Hojou," she said, her voice sickeningly sweet, "I know that you think this girl is who you want to be with, but-"

"There's no thinking about it," Hojou cut her off, never dropping his smile. "Kagome and I are dating. We're a couple." He raised his voice. "I hope no one has a problem with that, as it's no one's business who Kagome and I decided to see."

Kagome looked up at his handsome features then, blinking against the threat of tears. Sango had been right. Hojou was pretty amazing. You didn't find good guys like him every day. Kagome Higurashi was lucky.

"You- you can't-" Hiromi stuttered. "You can't possibly like Kagome."

His grin widened then, and looked down at Kagome, flashing a wink. "I guess I'll just have to prove it." He said. And before Kagome could form an idea of what he was up to, Hojou turned her in his arms and kissed her.

This kiss was deep, not the playful kiss he planted on her earlier at lunch. His tongue swept inside her mouth and Kagome prepared to melt into him like she had on their first date.

…She waited, as the kiss continued. His lips were soft and his mouth was warm and he smelled good. But again, she had this nagging sensation, like it suddenly wasn't good enough. Like now his kisses were boring and insignificant.

He broke free and grinned at her again, touching their noses together. Hiromi and her friends had long since gone, the crowd had dispersed. And all Kagome could think about was that something had changed.

For some reason, Hojou was not good enough anymore.


	6. Revival

Kagome

Kagome rubbed her hands together to ward off the cold. The seasons were changing, and while it hadn't quite reached full-blown-fall yet, the mornings and afternoons were getting colder. She blew a warm breath of air into her cupped fingers, and then rubbed them together again, as if her breath would seep into the appendages.

Sango was late.

Of course, technically, it was Kagome's fault. She'd had all week to research and put together her extra-credit assignment that Itou-sensei had given her. But had she been a studious little girl and gone to the museum ahead of time to do her research? No. She'd spent her week hanging out with Sango, doing her regular homework, and dating Hojou. She'd had a normal, fun week. And now she was paying the price.

She didn't know what had gotten into her. Normally Kagome would have easily scheduled in a few research trips to the museum. She knew better than to put off homework for manicures with Sango, or a movie with Hojou, but for some reason, every time she'd even  _thought_  about going to the museum she'd felt panic so intense it sought to overwhelm her. It was like that time she'd had to stand up in front of her entire school body and give a speech for a scholarship competition, where her nerves seemed to get the better of her. But she couldn't figure out why the museum made her so uneasy.

That's why Kagome was now standing out in the chilly weather, waiting for Sango. She'd had to beg her best friend to join her on her trip to the museum. She just couldn't go alone, and no, she couldn't tell her why, and yes, she knew it was ridiculous. Kagome had begged with Sango until she'd finally given in. And now it was Wednesday evening and it was thirty minuets to closing and if Kagome had any chance of ever getting her assignment done, this was it.

"Kagome!"

She turned her head and scanned the street. Sango was running up the block, her hand waving over her head. She bent over, hands on her knees as she came to stand next to Kagome, breathing heavily.

"Sango, you're late!" Kagome snapped, the nerves in her stomach felt like they were hurling themselves around her insides.

"Sorry, sorry," Sango breathed, finally straightening up and smiling. "Mom wouldn't let me out until I helped Kohaku with the rest of his homework. I tried to get here as fast as possible."

"Doesn't matter, let's go." Kagome said, hooking her arm through Sango's and pulling her towards the museum. She'd decided while she'd been waiting that she was going to just march right into the museum without stopping. If she stopped she feared she'd turn right on her heel and run in the opposite direction until her legs gave out, even if she had no idea why.

"Kagome, you've been acting strange all week. Why are you so uptight about this museum trip? It wasn't  _that_  bad inside."

She sighed. "I don't know. Maybe I'm nervous because of what Hiromi did…?" She paused, shaking her head. "That doesn't feel quite right though. I'm not sure why this makes me so uncomfortable."

"Well, let's change the subject. How was the date?"

Kagome swallowed a grimace and forced a smile onto her face. "It was fun. You know, movie, dinner, typical date stuff."

"And the kissing, of course."

Of course. Of course there had been kissing. Hojou had snuck her up to his bedroom and they'd kissed on his bed, then on his floor, and then on his bed again. Every time he'd kissed her, Kagome had tried to feel  _something_  like she'd felt before. She vividly remembered enjoying his kisses so much on their first date – it was such a strange experience to suddenly feel nothing, like a door had slammed shut with no warning. In a near-panic about it, she'd even turned to the internet, hoping Google could give her insight on what was happening to her.

Nope. She was the only person on the entire  _internet_  having this problem.

Still, she'd kept kissing him anyway, hoping that the next kiss would be the one to move her somehow. Then the next one…. Then the next…."

"Yeah, there was kissing," she finally agreed.

"Well, don't go into details or anything," Sango rolled her eyes, sarcasm dripping from her words.

"I don't know, Sango," Kagome said as they made their way up the museum steps, focusing on the conversation to avoid focusing on where she was headed. "It was nice."

Being her best friend, Sango knew when to drop it, although the set of her jaw told Kagome she wasn't going to get away with skipping on the details forever.

They reached the entrance to the museum and paid their way in, where the ticketing attendant informed them they only had twenty minuets. Quickly, they booked it towards the cave section of the museum.

The panic in her chest tried to suffocate her. She gripped onto Sango's hand, terrified for some reason she'd couldn't understand. Her brain screamed at her to run –  _Run!_  – even though common sense told her there was nothing down there to be afraid of.

"Kagome, my hand." Sango muttered, forcing Kagome to ease up a little on her grip.

"Sorry."

"You've been so weird lately, I hope it's just a hormonal thing."

Was that it? Was she on some kind of elongated PMS trip? She didn't think so, her rollercoaster of emotions were extreme – even for PMS.

They made their way through the cave, stopping in front of the mirror. It loomed over them, dark and beautiful. Kagome stood in front of it, the panic basically choking her. It reached a crescendo as she stepped forward – and then was abruptly gone.

One second she felt she might suffocate and die, and the next, she was suddenly.

"Huh." Kagome said, suddenly feeling like herself.

"What now?" Sango said, not bothering to look her way. She was bent over, leaning in to get a better look at the intricate frame.

"Nothing, I just…" She felt like she was going crazy. She'd never had sever mood swings before. She sighed, took a step back to look the mirror up and down. That familiar pull blossomed inside of her, the one she'd felt while she and Sango had been here on their class trip. She itched to touch the mirror, itched to feel the cool glass beneath her fingertips. She glanced around the room. The last of the visitors were just now shuffling towards the exit.

"Sango, do me a favor and keep a lookout?"

Sango raised her eyebrow, turning to face her. "What are you going to do now?" She asked.

"I just… I just need to touch it."

"Kagome, we're in a museum, you're not supposed to touch anything."

"When has that ever stopped you before?"

The slow grin that spread across her best friend's face was contagious. "You know me too well," Sango said, moving towards the steps. "Hurry up though," she called over her shoulder, "they're closing in a few minuets."

Finding the coast clear, Kagome turned her attention back to the mirror. She stepped over the ropes and slowly, gently touched her fingertips against the glass. The mirror was cool and hard under her hand, tinted darker than other mirrors. Kagome gazed at her reflection, trying to see past it somehow, as if there were a whole other world on the other side, like Lewis Carroll's Through the Looking Glass.

Her eyes shot down to her hand, her palm now pressed firmly against the mirror. She could have sworn she'd seen movement. Another hand, specifically, out of the corner of her eye. It was only for an instant, a flash, like someone had reached out quickly and then withdrew, but there was nothing there.

Suddenly, without warning, her memories slammed back into her. They hit her like a train, exploding inside her mind. She cried out and reared back, tripping over the velvet rope and falling to the floor, her head throbbing with the abrupt presence of true awareness.

Sango was on her in an instant, hands cupping her face. "Kagome, what is it? Are you okay? Kagome! I'm getting help." She moved to leave, but Kagome's hand shot out to wrap around her wrist.

"No," she panted, trying desperately to process the sudden mass of new information. "No, I'm okay, I…" she struggled to sit up, and Sango knelt down again to assist her.

"What happened? I've never heard anyone make a noise like that."

Kagome remembered, that's what happened. Kikyou, the mirror, Inuyasha,  _the kiss_. And suddenly she knew why she'd felt nothing when Hojou kissed her now. Because his kisses had been absolutely nothing like the way Inuyasha had kissed her. She stared, open-mouthed at the mirror. The hanyou hadn't shown himself, but she knew he was in there, watching her from the other side of the glass.

"I  _remember_ ," Kagome breathed. She stood up. "Sango, I remember what happened after Hiromi attacked me."

"Yeah, the guards found you and threw you outside."

She shook her head. "No they didn't. Do you trust me?" She asked, locking her gaze onto her friend.

"What kind of question is that?"

" _Sango_. Do you trust me?" Kagome repeated.

Sango narrowed her eyes, as if trying to figure Kagome out. Finally, she relented. "You know I trust you," she said.

"Good. Cause you're going to really need that trust right now. Come with me." With one last, knowing glance back at the mirror, Kagome pulled Sango along behind her. They walked quickly towards the back of the room, to where the long, narrow, empty hallway stood. She didn't stop until they reached the janitor's closet.

"Is this it?" Sango asked. "This is where they left you?"

Kagome nodded, buzzing with adrenaline. "It's a good thing you love me so much, Sango. Cause it's going to be a tight fit."

Confusion flittered across her face, then dawning realization. "You're not serious."

Kagome grinned. "Trust me, Sango, you're going to want to see this." And with that, she yanked the closet door open and pushed her friend inside, stepping in behind her and slamming the door shut, engulfing them in darkness.


	7. In The Dead Of Night

 

Kagome

"This is the stupidest thing I've ever let you talk me into," Sango said, shooting a heated glare Kagome's way.

At least, Kagome  _thought_  Sango was glairing. She couldn't tell because it was pitch black inside the closet. Kagome had felt crammed last time she had been in the small room, and with Sango, it was ten times worse.

"Just trust me." Kagome muttered.

"Yeah, you've said 'just trust me' over a hundred times in the last hour, Kagome. But you won't tell me what I'm supposed to trust you  _with_. And now we're stuck in the museum. All night."

Kagome rolled her eyes, even though Sango couldn't see her. "The point  _is_  to get stuck." She felt kind of bad, not telling Sango why they were hiding in the closet, but if she spilled, Sango probably wouldn't believe her… scratch that – Sango  _absolutely_  wouldn't believe her.

Kagome still couldn't quite wrap her head around it herself. It was like she had two memories in her head – one where she hadn't known Inuyasha existed, and the other where she'd known all along. And why did it take her touching the mirror again for all those memories to come back? Her knees shook when she remembered Kikyou appearing out of nowhere, forcing Inuyasha back into the mirror, and then commanding her minion to rip that weird marble out of her insides… She had obviously stumbled upon something dangerous…  _really_  dangerous.

But Kagome was never one to back down when she'd been wronged, and it pissed her off that Kikyou had erased her memories. Who was she to decide what Kagome could or could not remember? She felt violated, which made her  _angry_. Plus, now she'd uncovered a three-hundred-year-old legend. She had about a million questions and she wanted answers, and she was determined to get those answers from the hanyou tonight.

Like, for instance, what was up with that  _kiss_? Thinking of that kiss made her knees shake for a completely different reason, and the more she thought about it, the more irate she became. How  _dare_  some god-like hanyou stroll in and kiss her in such a way so that perfectly acceptable, normal kisses just weren't good enough anymore? She'd been fine with Hojou's kisses before, and Inuyasha had ruined that for her. She was determined to get him to fix it. She didn't know how she would make him do it, but she would.

"Check the time again?" Kagome asked, and Sango whipped out her phone and flipped it open.

"We've been in here for an hour and a half. Can we leave? This is not my idea of fun on a school night."

"It should be okay now, everyone should be gone." Kagome answered. She reached out for the door handle, fumbling a bit in the dark, before grasping it in her hand and opening the door.

It was just as she remembered from a week ago as she and Sango made their way back into the cavern. Half the torches extinguished, casting extreme shadows everywhere she looked. She felt nervous again, although it wasn't the same panicked feeling as before. These nerves were subtle, they felt real.  _Will he be the same_? She wondered as she led the way to the mirror. Part of her, the realist part, still scrambled to shake this whole thing off as just a crazy dream,

"So what now?" Sango asked, rubbing her arms against the chill. "This is creepy, what did you want me to see?"

Hesitantly, Kagome stepped forwards, closer to the mirror. "Inuyasha?" She called out softly. There was a quiver in her voice. "Inuyasha, are you there?"

"Kagome…" Sango said, shaking her head. "You've totally lost it. You're talking to a mirror. I think we need to-"

"It's about damn time you decided to show up." Inuyasha growled, appearing from the darkness of the glass and cutting Sango off. "What the fuck took you so long? Do you have any idea what it's like to be locked up in here?"

"What the  _hell_!" Sango cried, but Kagome wasn't listening.

How could she have possibly forgotten about him? It was as if he took up every corner of her mind, every thought process. He wore the same clothes –  _or lack there of_ , she thought – those same ears twitched atop his head as his eyes locked onto hers, heated and angry.

"Kagome, what the  _hell_?!" Sango repeated, grabbing onto her arm, just as Inuyasha said: "Stop fucking staring at me, wench. What took you so damn long?"

"I forgot…" Kagome said, then cleared her throat and tried again. "I forgot about you. I forgot about everything. Why did I forget?" She absent-mindedly brushed Sango's hand from her shoulder.

The hanyou snarled, his lips pulled back from his teeth. "The witch made you forget, obviously. She probably threw something in that spell to keep you away from here also."

She nodded. "I felt sick with nerves any time I even thought about the museum."

"Makes sense," he grunted. "But still, what's it been, a week?"

"Five days."

His eyes shifted and narrowed, as if he were doing calculations in his head.

" _Kagome_ ," Sango took advantage of the silence. "What the  _hell_   _is going on_?" She pulled at Kagome's arm, forcing her to face her. Sango's eyes were wide, her mouth open, and she was shaking slightly. Kagome suddenly felt like a horrible friend, dragging her along without explaining anything.

"Sango, this is Inuyasha. Remember that story the guide told us?"

"This is him?" She asked, her voice raising an octave higher than it normally did. "This is the three-hundred-year-old youkai trapped in the mirror." It came out like a statement. "A youkai." She stared Kagome down. "Trapped in a mirror." She added when Kagome didn't reply. "By  _magic_."

"I know it's hard to believe, but-"

"Hard to believe!" Sango barked out a sharp laugh. "This is impossible! This isn't happening! I'm dreaming."

"I thought that at first too, but I-"

"Oi, wench!" Inuyasha interrupted from the mirror. "You need to let me out again."

Kagome whipped back to face the hanyou. Explaining things to Sango would just have to wait.

"What if  _she_  comes back?" The thought of Kikyou sent a chill crawling up her spine.

"Keh. Kikyou won't be back for another two nights." His forearm rested up against the other side of the glass. Kagome could see the defined muscles wrapped around his ribs moving like liquid as he breathed. She tried to focus on something else. Like his ears. They were cute and not intimidating.

"How do you know she'll wait until then?"

"Because she comes every week, same time, same night, like clockwork." He growled.

Sango spoke up then. "That's not right, the guide told us the priestess comes every night. At midnight."

"By all means," Inuyasha snapped, "believe everything the guide says. It's only a three-hundred-year-old legend. She couldn't possibly have her facts wrong."

"Be nice," Kagome hissed.

He narrowed his eyes again, zeroing in on her. "Are you going to let me out or what?"

She'd been asking herself the same question. She'd have to kiss him again to release him, and while she yearned deep inside to feel those lips of his on her again, she was afraid of losing herself. And then there was Hojou to think about. Her life was quickly spinning out of the realm of normality. She was clinging of the idea of keeping a normal boyfriend with the last of her strength.

But it was hard, keeping Hojou in mind, when Inuyasha was so…  _otherworldly_. And she remembered what it felt like to kiss him. She remembered the way her body had reacted. She remembered everything.

"How did I suddenly remember everything?" She asked then, folding her arms. "I got close to the mirror and suddenly felt fine, and I realize that was part of the spell to make me forget, but how did I  _remember_?"

The hanyou fidgeted, his ears twitched. He looked away. Finally he shrugged. "I gave you your memories back." He glared at her through the glass. "When you touched the mirror I was able to make you remember."

"Why did you want me to remember?"

"Isn't it obvious?" He growled. Then ran a hand through his hair, continuing when she didn't reply. "You're the only one who can get me the fuck out of here. Everyone else I've shown myself to over the years has either run screaming, or Kikyou has kept them away. You're the first one in all these years to actually come back!"

Kagome's jaw dropped open.

Sango whistled low and long. "Kagome, I don't think this is such a good idea…."

"What will you do once you're out?" Kagome asked, ignoring Sango's doubts.

"Keh, I'll have to go into hiding, of course. That bitch will be after me once she realizes I'm gone."

"Well, where will you  _go_?"

He frowned. "I'll manage." They stared at each other over the silence, on either side of the mirror. Why was the thought of him wandering around in a time that was three hundred years his future so depressing?

"You won't hurt me?" She asked.

"I won't hurt you." He said.

He could be lying. But he hadn't tried to kill her before. In fact, he'd been almost… protective of her. She recounted the way he'd kept her behind his back, the way he'd told Kikyou to leave her out of it. The way he'd pounded frantically against the mirror as Kikyou's minion had ripped into her flesh. She wanted to ask him about the marble, but really, this probably wasn't the time. If she was going to have any success at getting him out of the museum, they'd have to act fast, before the guards interfered.

Yes, Inuyasha could be lying, but Kagome was nothing if not trusting. She took a step forward. Sango's hand shot out and grabbed onto her arm.

"Kagome, don't!" She said, eyes wide.

Kagome smiled, and placed her hand over her friends' fingers. "Sango, he's been in there so long," she said. "And against his will. He tried to protect me before, and he did give me back my memories."

"That's probably not a good thing considering he's a youkai! Forgetting about all this would be better protection!"

"He needs my help," was all she said. She marched right up to the mirror and placed her hands on the glass.

Inuyasha knelt down, inches away from her. His face took her breath away. Full lips and smooth skin and long, gorgeous hair. And his eyes, if possible, were more beautiful and intense than she remembered.  _Just get this part over with quickly_ , she thought, trying to keep her boyfriend in mind, and closed her eyes, pressing her lips against the mirror.

It took a few seconds, but his lips were on hers again. As soon as she felt the soft pressure of him against her, she pulled back, but his hand was pushed into her hair then, and he pressed her to him, keeping the connection.

She melted. She couldn't help it. All rational thought had been doused. He opened up to her and demanded she respond as he stepped fully out of the mirror. And she did, wrapping her arms around his neck and crushing herself to his chest. This was it. This is what had been missing from Hojou's kisses. This is what she'd been yearning for, without even knowing it. He nipped at her lips, pulling and nibbling, his tongue making her forget who she was.

" _Kagome!_ " Sango hissed, and suddenly, she came back to herself. Horrified at her lack of rational thought, she pulled away, fighting his strength as he tried to keep the kiss going. She pushed against his chest, and he growled, refusing to let her go. She reached up, tugging at his hair, but it only seemed to excite him. Moving her hand around, panicking, she felt something warm and fuzzy. It twitched when her fingertips grazed it. His ear! She grabbed onto it and yanked it back with all her might.

"Fuck!" He cried, dropping her into a panting, gasping heap on the floor and bringing his hand up to massage his wounded appendage. "What the hell?" He growled. "Bitch!"

Kagome shuffled back on the floor until she ran into Sango who helped her up. Her friend's gaze was glued to the hanyou, who had just magically come out of the mirror in front of her own eyes.

"I don't believe it," she whispered.

Still feeling breathless from the kiss, Kagome rolled her eyes. "Believe it," she muttered.

Inuyasha glared right at Kagome, still nursing his ear. "You didn't have to fucking tear it off," he growled.

"You wouldn't stop kissing me," Kagome accused.

He sniffed, crossing his arms. "Don't pretend you didn't like it wench, you were all over me."

"It's Kagome, remember? Not wench." She huffed. "And I was  _not_  all over you."

"You were kinda all over him," Sango agreed. She winced at Kagome's traitorous look. "It's not like I can blame you, I mean…." She let her words hang, her gaze raking over the half-naked hanyou standing in front of them.

Inuyasha shrugged. "Don't make a bigger deal out of it than it needs to be. It takes a kiss to get me out, and I  _have_  been stuck inside that damn mirror for centuries now. It doesn't matter at this point if an ugly-butt kisses me to set me free, I'd kiss a goat if it were a female at this point."

Kagome bristled. The nerve of him, kissing her like that and then comparing her to a goat. What was his problem? She was  _helping_  him. "Sorry for being such an  _ugly-butt_ ," she sneered. "Next time why don't you just show yourself to someone pretty? And you wouldn't let me go this time, I tried to stop the kiss. I have a perfectly gorgeous boyfriend who I kiss every day, thank you very much."

His eyes locked onto hers then, and a grin spread across his face slow, dangerous and sexy. "Ka-go-me," he said, pronouncing her name slowly, the way she'd first said it to him. "The way you kissed me says you don't have a boyfriend."

"I don't mean to break up this heart-warming chit-chat we have going on here, but we're standing in the middle of a museum at night time, we're locked in, and we've just pulled a freaking youkai out of a mirror –"

"Hanyou," both Kagome and Inuyasha corrected her at once.

Sango narrowed her eyes, looking back and forth between them. "Whatever. The point is, how the hell are we getting out of here? And if we do get out, what the hell do we do with him?"

The grin was back on Inuyasha's face again. "Don't worry about getting out of here, wench," he said. "Leave that to me."


	8. Inuyasha's Freedom

Inuyasha

Inuyasha knew the moment Kikyou ripped the jewel out of Kagome's side that he couldn't kill the doppelganger. It was like fate had dropped her in front of the mirror, all wide-eyed and innocent. Out of the billions of people on earth, out of all the places to be, she'd specifically been in  _his_  museum, in  _his_  room, gazing into  _his_  mirror as if she'd known all his secrets. When he'd finally gotten a whiff of her, and realized she wasn't actually Kikyou, he couldn't believe his luck.

He'd hatched a plan for his freedom at that point. He would convince the doppelganger to free him. He'd have to kill her so Kikyou wouldn't be able to find her and get any information out of her, but that was just poor luck on her part, not something he could help. Then, free of the mirror, he would go into hiding and track down the jewel so that he could finally rid himself of Kikyou. His plan played over and over in his head.

But then the plan had significantly changed. He couldn't kill the doppelganger because now she was the  _only_  human in the entire world that could help him.

That jewel, that  _blasted_  jewel was what started all his trouble in the first place. He couldn't fucking believe that she had it inside her the whole time their mouths had been glued together. He'd let his damn lust get the better of him. Had he known it was in her, had he just ripped it out of her right then and there, he could have turned full youkai and boosted his powers and finally killed off that damn witch once and for all. And then he'd be free right now.

But no, he'd thought with his dick instead of his brain. He thought he would've had better control over his lust after all these years, but the lack of any play whatsoever made it a million times worse. And now he was truly paying for it. Kikyou had actually shattered the jewel.  _Shattered it_ , and sent the shards off to only gods-knew-where! And once the witch wiped the poor girl clean of her memories, no way would she be back. Kikyou liked to set up sub-spells to make sure people did her bidding. He was sure she'd done something to make the doppelganger avoid the museum at all costs. He had lost his only chance to gain his freedom and track down the jewel shards. Even one, single shard would help him greatly.

Which is why Inuyasha was so shocked that she came back. His heart stopped when he saw her again. She was terrified, clinging to her friend, those same wide eyes darting around as if some horrible creature might jump out and tear her open. Despite her obvious fear, he couldn't help but be impressed with her. No one, not one single person he'd shown himself to over the years had ever come back. They just didn't. What was so special about this girl, then, that she could fight against Kikyou's spells?

She was different, this one. It wasn't just the fact that she was a doppelganger. It wasn't just the fact that she was tied to the jewel. There had to be some level of power in her somewhere. Just having the ability to fight against Kikyou in this way was a sign that she wasn't just an ordinary human.

Hope flooded inside him. If she was back, it meant that all wasn't lost. He couldn't show himself to her yet, though, and risk scaring her away before she remembered on her own. If she got close enough to the mirror, he knew, the severe anxiety she was feeling would stop. So he watched her creep forward, and prayed to his dead father that she would get close enough. Just a bit closer.

He knew when it happened. A look of bewilderment spread across her face, and muscles she probably hadn't realized she was tightening relaxed. It was icing on the cake when she reached out to touch the mirror. Because then Inuyasha could do a spell of his own.

He grinned from behind the mirror, unseen to her pretty, young eyes as the memories rushed into her and she stumbled back, falling down and staring up at him – well, at the mirror – in shock. His new plan was set into motion now, and this time he'd do it right.

Which is why he was currently leading the way through the museum, with the two girls following closely behind him. Clumsy and loud, their footsteps created sharp clatter as they made their way to the exit. Not that it mattered, Inuyasha was hardly worried about the guards. It was just fucking annoying. He scowled at them over his shoulder more than once.

The doppelganger grabbed onto his upper arm, her fingers barely closing half-way around. "What are you going to do?"

"Don't worry about it." He said, brushing her hand away.

She didn't listen to him. "You're not going to kill them, are you?"

Inuyasha stopped and fixed his eyes on hers. "I'm going to take a wild stab at the dark and guess that you don't want me to."

"Of course not!" She said, brows knotting together and nose scrunching up.

Inuyasha felt himself stir from below, and he bit his tongue to get the urge under control. This would never fucking work if he was horny all the time. "Don't worry," he mumbled, eyes darting away from her face, "I won't kill them."

Taking care of the guards would be easy. A simple compliance spell would do. He muttered the words low with his voice as they approached the security desk, feeling the workings of the spell build up within him until he was sure it was solid.

"Hey!" One of the guards stood from the desk then, having spotted them. He came from behind the desk, flashlight bouncing light around as he jogged over. "Hold it right there, how did you get inside?"

Inuyasha locked his eyes onto the man's face. "Hello. Please let us out." Keeping his words short and curt and straight to the point was the only way to deal with people when under his control.

A dazed look passed across the guards' face. His mouth went slack, then turned into a smile. "Of course, anything you wish. Right this way, please."

"Hey, hey!" The other girl said, the one that wasn't Kagome. "What did you do to him? Kagome, what did he do?"

The doppelganger shrugged, but darted her eyes up to him. "Will he be okay?"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. Was she always so worried about everyone around her? She didn't know this guy, what the hell did she care? "He's fine. You going to follow him or what, wench? This is your chance to get out of here." He grinned. "But by all means, stay."

Her brows scrunched together again, and Inuyasha pushed away at the thought that she didn't look half bad angry. She didn't answer him, just grabbed the other girl's hand in her own and set her jaw determinedly.

Inuyasha shook as he stepped out into the cold night air. Kikyou would let him out every so often, under her complete control, of course, to do her bidding. But it had been three-hundred very long years since he had felt the ground beneath his bare feet on his own terms. As soon as he was outside of the building he headed straight for the first patch of grass he saw, only a few feet away. He reveled in the way each blade caressed his soles, how the dirt gave way as he dug his toes into it. He knelt down and placed his hands upon it, gouging his claws into the earth. He inhaled deeply, closing his eyes. This is what he'd spent his time yearning for in that damn mirror, when he wasn't contemplating revenge, this freedom that he ached for deep inside. Finally. Finally he was free.

"So now what?" The other girl asked, breaking Inuyasha from his luxurious thoughts. "What do we do with him?"

He turned to watch Kagome's reaction. She shrugged. "I don't know. We have to hide him somewhere. Maybe I can sneak him into the storage shed in my backyard? Make a make-shift bed? Mom hasn't been in since dad's been gone, and Souta is still too young to use anything in there, so it's a pretty good hiding place, actually."

"Oi, I think you have the wrong idea." Inuyasha growled, reluctantly moving away from the grass and joining the girls on the pavement. "You," he said, pointing a finger at Kagome, "are coming with me. We'll head out to the forest now and find a place to sleep there, but I want to be clear out of this area by the time the witch returns." He had to make sure Kagome didn't wander from his sight at this point. She was too damn important to him, being Kikyou's doppelganger.

"Wha-what?" She cried, her face draining of color. "You've  _got_  to be kidding! I am not sleeping out in the  _forest_ , okay? I don't like camping, I like sleeping in my bed, thank you very much!"

He felt the growl ripping free of his throat. "Wench, you're not leaving my side, not for one moment. If we're going to survive this, we need to stay close."

"My name isn't wench, it's Kagome. And I'm not galloping off with you to god-knows-where, I have school tomorrow, I have a report due the day after, I have my family to think about. They'll freak when I don't come home!"

He couldn't believe she was arguing with him. Who did she think she was? "None of that matters anymore. When the witch comes back and sees me gone, who do you think she'll go after?  _You_. She knows who you are now, you'll be the first person she goes looking for." He stepped closer to her, willing her to be intimidated. Willing her to bend to him. He tried to ignore the fact that her resistance was for some reason turning him on. He idly wondered what she'd do if he kissed her again, like he had before. Would she bend to his will then? "You want to fucking die?" He said, lowering his voice to intimidate her. "Because if we don't run, she will kill you."

He could smell her fear. He could also smell her arousal. And her resistance. She'd dug her heels in to keep from showing him any fear, he could see it in her stance, legs apart, arms crossed, jaw locked into place.

Fuck, how could she possibly turn him on this much?  _It's just the fucking lack of opportunity, idiot,_  he berated himself.

"I'm not going." She said.

"Listen, wench, I-"

"It's Kagome!"

Inuyasha opened his mouth to give her a good lashing. He would reach out and throw her over his shoulder and take off with her if she kept arguing with him like a fucking child. He opened his mouth to tell her this, when the hunger hit him.

"Fuck!" He cried out, clutching his stomach.

Kagome's face changed from angry to horrified in an instant. "What is it? Are you okay?" She took the two steps and reached out, her hands on his shoulders.

"I'm fine. I'm fine!" Inuyasha snapped, jerking away from her touch. "I'm just hungry, that's all. Argh, it hurts!"

"Hungry?" The other girl said. "Like, for blood?"

He whipped his head around to glare at her. "I'm not a fucking vampire," he said. "I'm just hungry. I haven't had anything to eat in…." He had to think back to the last time Kikyou had let him out of the mirror to do her bidding. "Sixty years." He decided.

" _What_?!" Both girls exclaimed at once, jaws dropping.

"How is that possible?" The doppelganger said.

"When I'm in the mirror," he gasped out, clutching onto his stomach, "my urges are suppressed."

" _All_  of them?" The other girl asked.

"Just the ones that are necessary." He growled. "I need some food, quickly. I need to hunt." He wasn't sure that he could do it though, the hunger was so fucking intense. Kikyou had never let him feel it. She'd had food prepared for him the moment he'd stepped out of the mirror. Fuck, it hurt!

"Hunt?" Kagome squeaked.

"Yes, hunt!" He snapped at her. "The longer I'm out of the mirror, the worse this fucking pain is."

"Well, you're not hunting. We'll go buy something for you to eat, I still have some of this week's allowance."

"Whatever, just get me to a place where I can have some food!"

Kagome turned to her friend, and they shared a worried glance. "What time is it, Sango?" She asked.

Sango pulled out her cell phone and flipped it open. "9:20, we could hit up a fast-food joint."

Inuyasha watched as Kagome sighed. She stepped over to him and reached out to help him up. Startled, Inuyasha jerked away from her. "What are you doing?"

Her nose scrunched up again. "What does it look like I'm doing? You need to stand up."

"I can do it myself, wench." He bit out. He didn't want her touching him, he didn't like how he seemed to lose control when she did, how he seemed to hone in on and obsess about her touch. He also didn't want to look fucking weak.

"Fine," she said, throwing her hands up into the air. "Let's go." She reached out and grabbed her friends' hand instead, and, clutching his stomach, Inuyasha stood and followed behind, trying to ignore his frantic hunger.


	9. Inuyasha's Curse

Kagome

"He doesn't have a shirt on, they won't let him in," Sango said, pointing to the 'no shirt – no service' notice posted on the Mos Burgers door. She glanced back to Inuyasha, her eyes narrowing. "He looks like one of those cosplay people."

Kagome sighed. "Okay, here, take the cash." She dug into her purse and pulled out her wallet, handing it over to her friend, glancing over to Inuyasha herself. He was still somewhat bent over, clutching at his side, his face contorted in pain. Sweat dripped from his hairline and down his nose. He shook with hunger, his whole body quivering in small, tightly controlled bursts. "Uh, you'd better get as much as you can with what I have," she added, wondering how much food would be enough to fill sixty years of an empty stomach.

Sango plucked Kagome's wallet from her hands and walked into the building, leaving Inuyasha in Kagome's care. She walked over, reaching out instinctively to help him around to the outside seating area, but pulled away as his eyes locked onto hers, warning her not to touch him.

Fine, he was so disgusted by her touch? She'd never touch him again. She forced down the sudden inner cry that she  _wanted_  to touch him. She thought about his kisses. He hadn't seemed disgusted by her touch then. She shook her head to clear it as she sat down, Inuyasha falling onto the bench beside her, resting his head on the table.

"How long is your stupid friend going to take?" He growled.

"She's not stupid, and she's going to order you a lot of food so you won't be so hungry, give her a few seconds."

"I could have hunted and killed enough to feed all three of us for a week by now," he snapped.

Kagome wrinkled her nose at the thought of him strangling bunnies and ripping apart squirrels to eat their insides, her stomach churning. "Not an option. I like animals, I'm not letting you go out and murder a bunch of forest critters."

"Just – ugh! – just shut up wench, I can't take your constant talking right now."

She set her jaw against his words, trying to keep cool. It wouldn't do to start a fight here, out in the open, with Inuyasha the way he was. She still wasn't one hundred percent convinced that he wasn't going to kill her, although, something in her gut told her that probably wouldn't happen, no matter how brash and rude and barbaric he was. She sat next to him, silent, as he growled and moaned and made a fuss.

 _Men_ , she thought, inwardly rolling her eyes.  _What a bunch of babies_. A thought struck her then.  _Was_  Inuyasha a man? He was youkai, that was for sure. Err, hanyou, half youkai and half human. But still, was man the right word for what he was?

She shot a quick glance his way, trying to seem as indifferent as she possibly could. He  _looked_  man enough, and he sure as hell had  _felt_  man enough. And there had to be both male and female youkai, cause how did they reproduce otherwise? Kagome had the sudden image of Inuyasha asexually reproducing a perfect replica of himself and couldn't help the giggles that escaped her lips.

"What the hell do you have to laugh about?" He snapped.

"Nothing, it's just…" did she dare ask him? "There are female youkai, right?"

His facial expression set her off in another fit of giggles just as Sango approached. "What's so funny?" She asked, setting the overloaded tray onto the table.

"You tell me!" Inuyasha growled, reaching for the first hamburger on top of the pile. He bit into it.

"Whoa, Inuyasha, unwrap it first!" Kagome reached out and yanked it from his hands as he swallowed his bite, paper and all. She unwrapped it to show him before handing it back. He swiped it up and ate the entire thing faster than she's ever seen anyone do before.

"Your allowance didn't get much food, Kagome," Sango said, handing her wallet back to her. "I put up for the rest. You owe me lunch for a few days."

"Got it, thanks Sango." She said, and both girls settled in to watch Inuyasha inhale his food.

Twenty-three hamburgers, seven packs of chicken nuggets and seventeen fries later, plus multiple trips back inside for Kagome to fetch more soda and catsup, Inuyasha had satiated the majority of his hunger. He slowed his eating down at the end, seeming to savor every bite, and he had definitely perked up. Kagome saw the smallest trace of a smile quirking at the corners of his mouth.

"So, I have a couple of questions," she said, sounding braver than she felt.

"I have a  _million_  questions," Sango chimed in. "Like what the hell actually happened to you that night? Obviously the guards didn't kick you out, and this Kikyou person has a lot to do with it. I also feel like I might be dreaming." She added, eyes raking over the hanyou sitting in front of her.

Kagome filled her in then, on everything, right down to the detail of her side being ripped open by Kikyou's minion.

"How come I didn't notice your wound?! Kagome!" Sango cried, reaching for her shirt and lifting it up.

Kagome brushed her hands away. "I'm fine, there's no wound, no scar, nothing."

"Makes sense," Inuyasha said through a mouthful of fries. "Kikyou wanted you to stay away, not remember. Obviously a gaping wound in your side would have tipped you off that something was wrong."

Kagome turned her attention back to Inuyasha then, determined to get some answers. "Speaking of Kikyou, who is she? And why did she trap you in the mirror in the first place?"

His face changed. He frowned. "That doesn't concern you."

"But-"

"I said it doesn't fucking concern you, so drop it. It doesn't matter why I was spelled inside the mirror, it just matters that I stay out of it."

"Okay, fine. Can you tell us why she has to keep coming back to re-do the spell?"

He took another bite. Chewed slowly. Swallowed. "The spell has its limits. If she doesn't come back once a week to weave the spell again her powers start to fade, which means she'll start to lose control over everything she's spelled in the past. She's powerful. Too powerful for me to take head-on right now. That's why I have to stay on the run, so she can't find me to do the spell again. If I stay away long enough, and if her powers weaken enough…." his smile was dark and dangerous. "I'll be able to finally kill the bitch once and for all."

"So the plan is to weaken her and kill her?"

"Keh," he scoffed, "don't tell me you're going weak in the stomach, wench. She's dangerous."

"You're dangerous."

His smile widened to a grin. "You're right. I am dangerous. But I won't spell you, and I won't chase after or kill you. So right now, I'm the only thing standing between you and Kikyou."

Kagome mulled that over in her head. He was right. At the moment, she was more scared of Kikyou than she was of Inuyasha.

"Are there other youkai?" Sango asked. "Like you?"

"Of course there are other youkai. There are billions of youkai. Youkai do not go extinct just like humans do not go extinct."

"How come we never see any?"

Inuyasha shrugged. "I'm assuming they've evolved to blend in with you humans."

"You don't blend in."

"Do I look like I've evolved in your world?"

Kagome chimed in again. "Do all youkai have powers like you and Kikyou?"

He shook his head slowly. "No. Youkai do not have powers. At least, not the kind I do. It's not magic, it's just the use of a very ancient language, which I've picked up here and there over the years from observing the witch. That and you can't live in a spelled mirror and not have some of that power seep into you."

"Will you start to lose your powers like Kikyou will, the longer you're away from the mirror?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I'll just have to wait and see, but it doesn't matter if I do lose my power, because a Kikyou without power is a weak Kikyou. Easily defeated." Kagome watched him clutch his fists together.

"You said she lets you out every so often, to do her bidding. Why? What does she have you do for her?"

He inhaled sharply then, his eyes narrowing. He dropped his hamburger onto the tray. "You don't want to know."

"I  _do_  want to know," Kagome pressed.

He slammed his hands down on the table, making both girls jump. "You don't fucking want to know. Drop it."

She sighed again, changing subjects. "So what about the marble she ripped out of me then? What was it?"

"The Shikon no Tama. It's not a  _marble_ ," he sneered, "it's a jewel. A very powerful jewel."

"So why was it in  _me_?"

He sat back then, running his hand thoughtfully through his hair. She tried not to follow the trail of his hand, tried not to be mesmerized by the silky strands brushing through his fingers.

"I'm not sure," he finally said. "You look like her though. You're either her distant relative or you're a reincarnation. Some sort of doppelganger."

Kagome's back stiffened. " _What_?"

He shrugged. "It makes sense."

"I can't be her reincarnation, she's still alive."

"Is she?" He asked.

"Isn't she?"

He smiled then. "Not exactly." He waved her next question away. "It doesn't matter though. We do need to get the jewel back. It will help me defeat her when she is finally weak enough." He chewed and swallowed the last of his food. "That's all you need to know for now. And I'm full."

"Thank god," Sango muttered. "I had to use my mom's credit card."

Kagome wanted to ask him more questions. She had so many. But it was getting late, and they needed to figure out their next plan of action. "So now I guess we'll sneak you into my back yard…" Kagome said, already knowing it was a long-shot. "I'm worried my family might discover you though."

"No good." Inuyasha said. "The witch will come looking for us there. She knows you now. She knows where you live."

Sango sighed then, rolling her eyes. "The things I do for you, Kagome," she said. "Let's stay at my house tonight, my parent's are gone until next week."

"Oh Sango, thank you so much." Kagome said, whipping out her cell. "I'll call mom and let her know I'll be at your place tonight."

.

.

Kagome lay on the makeshift bed on the floor of Sango's room. It was early in the morning, the alarm clock on the desk flashed five a.m. She stared at the ceiling, thinking over the night's events.

Getting Inuyasha to agree to stay at Sango's had been agonizing. He'd gone so far as to try and carry her off into the forest, until she'd started to cry, scared for her life at that point. He's stopped then, dropping her back onto her feet and mumbling about her overreacting. But he'd finally agreed to stay at Sango's.

Sango had scrounged up a change of clothes for him from her father's wardrobe, a pair of jeans that were a bit too wide for his hips and an oversized t-shirt. He'd complained about modern clothing, but had let Sango take his hakama with a promise to kill her if she did not get it back to him in one piece after she washed it.

When they all finally settled in for the night, Inuyasha had balked at the idea of sleeping inside. He climbed out the window, mumbling about open space and breathing room. That was around one in the morning.

And now here she was, three hours later, wide awake and listening to Sango's soft breathing, wondering how the hell her friend could be sleeping at a time like this. Kagome felt like she was a live wire, electricity running through her veins, her heart pounding. She had school tomorrow – er, today – and a report due the day after. She had parents and chores to attend to. She had a boyfriend who was waiting to see her again.

She pushed all thoughts of Hojou back, a wave of guilt crashing over her. They'd barely started dating and she was already the world's worst girlfriend. She didn't want to break up with him – she  _didn't_  – but how could she be satisfied with his kisses now? How could she be okay with plain lips and plain eyes and plain hair and a plain body when there was one so beautiful and otherworldly that she'd had a taste of?

She was being ridiculous, she knew. What the hell did she think was going to happen? That the hanyou would want to be with her? Take her on dates and to movies and buy her presents and introduce her to his parents?

She giggled at the thought. Then heard him move on the rooftop. She sat up, listening. He moved again. Sighing, knowing sleep wouldn't come to her tonight anyway, she moved to the open window and peeked out. She couldn't see him. He had to be behind her, on the very peak of the roof.

He moved again, and this time she could hear him grumble something, although she couldn't make it out. Slowly, carefully, she climbed out onto the rooftop, locking the muscles in her legs to keep her firmly planted as she started the climb up.

He was sitting there, looking like a god, his platinum hair like a beacon in the dark, golden eyes sharp and sparkling against the reflection of the artificial porch light. He was perched at the top of the roof, where the two slanted sides met, resting on his haunches, his elbow propped up on his knee, his chin resting in the palm of his hand. He didn't glance in Kagome's direction as she made her way to him. He kept his gaze fixed firmly on the night sky.

Slowly, Kagome eased herself down beside him, feeling clumsy and ridiculous next to him. She'd only been on her own roof once, just to see what it would be like, but she'd been yelled at when her grandfather caught her up there, and she'd never gone back up since. She smiled, remembering how upset her mother had been, how worried they were that she'd fall and break her neck.

But the over-protectiveness of her family was to be expected, what with her dad falling to his death and all.

"….It looks different."

Kagome shook her head, moving from her thoughts of the past. "What?" She asked. He'd spoken so softly, she wasn't sure if she'd heard him correctly.

"The night sky. The stars. Even the moon. It all looks different." He said.

She watched his profile as he watched the sky. He was unbelievably beautiful, wrapped in darkness, bathed in moonlight, eyes glowing as he scoured the heavens. The instinct to reach out and run her fingertips against the sharp edge of his jaw overwhelmed her for a moment, but she quickly squashed it down.

"Do you know a lot about stars, Inuyasha?" She asked.

He shrugged, not looking at her. "I wouldn't say I know a lot about them. I do like them though. Or," he sighed, "I did."

Kagome cocked her head to the side, curious. "Not anymore?"

He frowned. "They were always a reminder of stability. It didn't matter what happened during the day, when night came, they were always there. But over the years, they've gone out. Most of them are gone. What has happened to my world, that so many stars have been extinguished?"

She smiled then, knowing. "Ah. I'm happy to tell you then, that they are still there."

"Keh," he scoffed, finally tearing his gaze away from the sky and fixing it to her. "No they're not. They haven't been for a long time. Over the years, when Kikyou would let me out to do her bidding, I started to notice the stars were less and less." The corners of his mouth twitched up. "If you'd seen it back then, you would find the stars of today to be lacking."

Her grin widened. "But they  _are_  still there. You can't see them well from here because of the light pollution."

He raised his eyebrow, skeptical. "What the hell is light pollution?"

"Take a look," Kagome said, spreading her arms out in front of them. The small valley below stretched out before them, city lights glowing, the few car lights on the road slowly making their way through like lazy caterpillars crawling along. "All that light from our modern world, all those buildings and all those cars and all those homes… It's all creating light pollution. We can't see the light of the stars because it's bouncing off all the light that we're creating down here." She turned to look at him again. She couldn't help the small giggle that made its way out at the amazement on his face. "The stars are still there, Inuyasha, they're still shining, you just can't see them right now."

His eyes moved back to hers then, wide and searching. His gaze made her fidget. "Wh-what?" She asked.

"Nothing. Nothing," he repeated. "But why would you want to create something to block out the stars?" His back stiffened then, and he inhaled sharply. "Have you never actually  _seen_  all the stars, wench?" He asked. "Even thought they're there?"

She didn't correct him, she was too amused by his suddenly curious expressions. She'd seen him angry, and she'd seen him hungry, both for food and other –  _ahem_ – things. But she had yet to see him so full of wonderment.

"I have," she replied, stretching her legs out in front of her and leaning back onto her hands. "Only a few times though. If you go to a place so remote, where there's barely a single person around, and you wait until nightfall, then you can truly see the stars." She closed her eyes to enrich the memory. "There are so many, and you can feel the  _depth_  of them, feel how deep the universe is. Suddenly, the sky doesn't look or feel so flat. Suddenly, you feel so tiny and so large and the same exact time." When she opened her eyes, he was staring straight at her again, that same expression he'd had earlier. She felt her heart skip. "What is it? Why do you keep looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" He asked, moving closer as he said it. "What am I looking at you like?"

How could she put it into words the way his eyes spoke? She'd never seen the likes of it before. Like he wanted to devour her, but she wasn't quite sure in which way. "You look like you want to eat me." She finally said.

He grinned then, his teeth flashing. "Ah, Ka-Go-Me." He said. He was almost on top of her, blocking out her vision of the sky. "I do. I want to eat you." And he closed his mouth over her own.

It was impossible to explain how he made her lose all rational thought, made her fall apart at the seams as he pressed close to her, pulled her to him. He laid her back gently against the rough tiles of the rooftop, propping his weight on his arm, his hip resting next to hers. He wrapped his arm around her waist and gathered her to him.

She felt that same heat spread through her. She didn't resist as he took from her, didn't fight back. How could she, when her body screamed for him every waking moment? She positively ached for him, and it grew stronger as he kissed her. His kisses were slow this time, slow and heated and seductive. She trembled under the touch of his hand pressed firmly against her lower back, against his hips flush to her.

She wanted to feel more of him then, craved skin-to skin contact. She reached down with shaking hands, and slipped her fingers under his borrowed shirt. Heat sizzled on her fingertips as she grazed them lightly against the hard plans of his stomach, slowly moving them up, up, up, taking the shirt with her. He growled into her mouth, nipped at her tongue, and moved his hand from her back to her hip, slipping his hand under her shirt and skimming along her side; the swell of her hip, the dip of her waist, tracing his hand along the edge of her bra.

She lost herself in him; in his touch, in the sudden nakedness of his chest as he pulled away to rip the shirt over his head before claiming her again. He rolled her onto her back and straddled her, his knees on either side of her hips, never breaking their kiss. His grabbed at her shirt, pulling it up slowly, slowly,  _agonizingly_ slow. Kagome's breathless pants changed to heated moans under him. She couldn't help the way her hips pushed up against him, feeling the harness that awaited her, rubbing against him, desperate for the friction she was creating.

"Fuck," he half panted, half growled as he pulled away from her lips then. She protested, crying out for him, then sighed as his lips found her lower abdomen. He kissed every inch of her, up, up, up to her bra, his fingers reaching up and clawing right through the fabric that wrapped protectively around her chest.

She would explode. She felt too big for her body, desperate for release as the very first rays of sunlight broke over the horizon. His tongue lavished her, his fingers slipped low, teasing her inner thighs, coaxing her open for him. She felt pressure as Inuyasha moved his mouth up to capture her lips again, kissing her deeply as his fingers pressed into her –

\- and were suddenly gone.

So were his lips.

Kagome opened her eyes to a deep lavender sky, wondering why he'd pulled away. She sat up. Looked around. "Inuyasha?" She called, pulling her shirt down and standing on wobbly legs to scan the roof, the yard, the street that stretched out in front of her. The shirt he'd borrowed was still lying on the roof. That was the only sign left of him.

He was gone.

" _Inuyasha_!" She cried, her voice ringing out into the emerging sunlight.


	10. Inuyasha's Return

 

Inuyasha

"You've got to be  _fucking kidding me_!" Inuyasha roared, slamming the side of his fist into the mirror. It shook under the force of his angry assault, but held firm, much to his dismay. Breaking something sounded like an excellent idea to him at the moment. The only problem was that there was nothing around him that he could break.

He was back inside his cell. How the hell had he gotten back into his cell? It didn't make any sense. He had been released, and he knew that Kikyou hadn't come to visit since then. She never did except for the one night a week at midnight. In all the years he'd been held captive she had never broken the pattern.

So how the fuck had he gotten back?

The walls seemed to close in on him after spending the whole night a free man. He was caged up like an animal again. And it didn't help his mood that he actually  _felt_  like an animal. Really, out of  _every_ moment in time, the mirror had chosen  _that moment_  to bring him back. When he'd been wrapped around a soft, supple, feminine body. He brought his fingers up to his lips. They felt swollen. He could feel the doppelganger's sizzling skin on the tips of his fingers still, could see her eyes fluttering shut, her cheeks flushed red, her body quivering under him. He lifted his other hand up to look at his fingers. The first two were still sticky, proof that he'd really been next to her, pushing into her. He could still taste her. Her tongue, her skin…

He shook his head and bit his tongue against his lustful thoughts. His groin was extra sensitive, pushing against his borrowed pants. He couldn't remember a time that he'd ever been so turned on. And he'd been  _so close_  to getting the release that he needed.

And damn if the doppelganger didn't want him. She turned to putty under his skilled fingers. Inuyasha couldn't help the slow grin spreading across his face as he remembered how her face had changed from calm and relaxed to instantly ready for him. How her eyes widened and he leaned in, how her heart pumped loudly inside her chest.

"Shit," he growled, pushing away from the glass and laying on his back on the cold stone floor. He breathed in deeply, then out. In. Out. In. Out. He counted to fifty in his head. He thought about running through the trees, the wind in his hair. He thought about bathing in the natural spring water of the forest, he thought about anything other than Kagome and her body.

He sat up, clenching his abdominal muscles, and then released them as he lay back down. Again he sat up, clenched, then down, released. Up. Clench. Down. Release. Again and again he performed his crunches, over and over and over. One hundred. Two hundred. Three-fifty. The burn kicked in somewhere in the high five hundreds

After eight hundred crunches he started to feel more like himself. Once he reached eleven hundred, he flipped over and started all over again with push-ups. Up and down, up and down, breathing in and breathing out. The sweat dripped from his forehead, splashing onto the flattened rock underneath him. Still he pushed onward.

Physically drained, his body now burning from exhaustion rather than lust, he collapsed again onto his back, his arm resting across his forehead. He focused on his breathing, feeling his chest rise and fall as he inhaled and exhaled. He stared at the ceiling of his cell, his eyes tracing along the cracks and bumps that ran back and forth above him.

Now that he could finally concentrate on what was actually important, Inuyasha turned his thoughts to the mirror.

He had never, in all these years, been snapped back inside his cage for no reason at all. He'd been out before, doing Kikyou's bidding, but he'd always stepped back into the mirror with his own feet. Never had he been in one place and then suddenly another. Never had he been ripped away like he'd been ripped away from Kagome. Never.

There was something he was missing here. Something was off. He frowned, wondering if it was because Kikyou had been the one to let him out the other times. Maybe he could only truly be free if Kikyou's lips were the ones to do it?

 _That doesn't make any fucking sense though_ , he thought, rolling onto his stomach and resting his head into his folded arms.  _If only her lips can free me for good, why allow Kagome's lips do it as well? Why let anyone else free me at all_? He supposed it could be some sick game of Kikyou's, but he didn't think so. It wasn't really her style. Her style was more blunt and to the point.

So what was different this time? What had changed? He lifted his head then, hearing noises on the other side of the mirror. He watched as the first of the museum-goers shuffled passed the glass, gawking and pointing and talking in hushed voices. Daytime had to be in full swing now.

Kagome flashed into his mind again. He was kissing her atop her friend's roof, under the stars. Through her heated moans and whimpers of arousal he could feel the air around him warming bit-by-bit, could feel daylight coming like a slow-moving tidal wave, ready to swallow them both up. He'd felt a rush. It had been years,  _years_  since he'd seen the sunlight. Since he'd felt it against his skin. Since Kikyou came only once a week and always at midnight, that was the only time she freed him to work for her. And his tasks were always done well before the sun rose.

Well before the sun rose.

Well… before…

Inuyasha inhaled sharply. He sat up on his haunches and shouted at himself inside his head, hurling curses left and right.

How the  _fuck_  could he have been so stupid? How did he miss it? Of  _course_ , it was the most obvious thing in the world!

Daylight. Daylight was the key. It was the curse. It was the safety Kikyou had spelled into his entrapment. It made so much sense, Inuyasha wanted to shout at the top of his lungs. He wanted to laugh until his sides hurt, laugh until he puked. If the bitch let him out at night and he somehow managed to escape, which he had never been able to, and he had tried many times, all she had to do was wait until morning, and – _snap_ \- Inuyasha would be right back in his cage, wrapped up nice and tidy for her, like a present.

He had to suppress his furious growl. Fuck her. Fuck her and her control issues. Fuck her and her spells and her entrapments and her fucking obsession with him. He didn't want to fucking do her bidding anymore. He  _hated_  doing the things she made him do. He had nightmares about it. He hated himself for it. He wanted out.

But how could he get out now? He needed more than a single night, then a mere twelve hours to hunt down the jewel shards and piece them together. He needed more than a night to attain his freedom. How could be possibly do that if the mirror kept dragging him back over and over?

More than anything though, more than he'd ever wanted before, he wanted to feel the sun against his skin again, feel the warmth of it soak into him.  _I wonder what Kagome looks like in the sun_ , he thought fleetingly. The need grew in him. He ached to see daylight.

He had to calm himself down again, and it took a bit before he finally had his murderous rage under control.

Kikyou was smart, but she wasn't unbeatable. He would find a way to outwit her.

Inuyasha sat cross-legged in the center of his cell, watching the humans shuffle back and forth in front of him, thinking. Every idea he came up with, every solution he thought of was immediately shot down. But there had to be some way to give himself more time out of the mirror, some way to keep Kikyou from spelling him every week.

Killing her wouldn't work, after all, unless she weakened, and she wouldn't weaken unless she couldn't spell the mirror and couldn't draw her power from it.

Inuyasha stood up and paced then, back and forth across the small cage. He was on the verge of something, he could feel it. He'd watched Kikyou perform her spell over and over. He knew the enchantment by heart now. But what did that matter when it was time he needed? He couldn't break the enchantment, not with any spell of his own. But what choice, really, did he have if not to break it?

It struck him then. Fuck, it was obvious! Break the mirror. He could break the mirror from the outside, and re-frame a large piece with the spell. A piece large enough to fit inside during the day, and small enough to carry around at night. It would be crowded inside, but really, did it matter in the long run?

No, it fucking didn't.

He was so excited he slipped up and stepped too close to the glass, showing himself for the briefest nanosecond. There was a couple standing in front of the mirror, the man looking down at the description plate, reading aloud, his girlfriend staring up into the glass. Her eyes widened as she caught the quick flash of Inuyasha and she tugged at her boyfriend's arm, pointing at the mirror.

"Did you see that? Did you see?" She exclaimed, jumping excitedly on the balls of her feet.

"What?" He asked, head snapping up to the mirror.

"The youkai, I swear I saw him, I swear!" She stepped closer, eyes narrowed and searching.

"No you didn't." The boyfriend said, smiling at her.

"No I swear he was there, just for a second!"

 _Fuck, I was careless_ , Inuyasha berated himself as he watching the bickering couple. Not that it mattered so much, no one was going to believe her. He couldn't help but yearn to be free of the mirror again though, to not have to worry about being seen, to be able to walk freely among the humans again.

He smirked.  _She wouldn't stay with her boyfriend if she got a good look at me_. He chuckled quietly, the sound echoing off the walls around him.

He was revitalized now, bursting with energy. So what if his first plan hadn't worked out so well, with Kikyou showing up and all. And so what if his second plan had failed too, being sucked right back into the mirror?  _Third time's the charm_ , he thought, grinning to himself. This plan was going to work. And it was just too bad that Kagome didn't feel like being pulled away from school and family. He needed her if he was going to succeed. If he was right about her, she would be able to detect shard fragments. She could lead him right to the jewel.

And since she seemed to be oh-so-willing to fuck him, he didn't mind if she warmed his bed, either.

He sat back down again, his plan forming, plotting his actions in order to gain the jewel and defeat Kikyou once and for all.

Right now all he had to do was wait for the sun to set.

.

.

Please remember to review, I'm serious about my writing and my stories, and if you have anything to comment about or anything to mention or anything to say, I would love to hear it.

~SugarRos


	11. Kagome's Dilemma

 

Kagome

"Sango. Sango, get up." Kagome pushed at her friend's shoulder, harder than she would have under normal circumstances. However, things at the moment were far from normal. Things had become so abnormal, in fact, that if Sango weren't here, she would think she'd gone crazy. "Get! Up!" Kagome yelled, shaking as hard as she could.

"What?  _What_?!" Sango finally said, smacking her hands away and sitting up, brows knotted together. "What the hell, Kagome? It's six in the morning, I have another thirty minutes to sleep!"

"Sango, he's gone."

Her eyes widened then, and she looked around the room. "What do you mean, gone? He ran away?"

Kagome shook her head. "No, gone as in just gone. He was here one second, and then he wasn't. He just disappeared."

"People don't just disappear."

"He's youkai."

Sango tilted her head. "Do youkai disappear?"

"How would I know, I've only met the one!" Kagome could feel the first signs of hysteria clawing its way up through her chest.

"Calm down. Where was he?"

"On the roof!"

"What was he doing up there?"

Kagome couldn't help the immediate flush that spread across her cheeks. No way could she tell Sango what happened up on the roof. She couldn't believe she'd gone so far with him. The need had been intense and consuming. She hadn't felt like herself at all. Like she was a completely different person.

"Um… stargazing."

Sango narrowed her eyes accusingly. "Stargazing? Kagome…"

"What?" She asked, more defensively then she intended.

"It's written all over your face, don't lie to me."

The two girls stared each other down before Kagome finally gave in and moved to sit on Sango's bed, her head falling into her hands. "Sango, I just… I don't know what's come over me."

"What were you guys doing up there?"

"He just…" She bit her lip, wondering just how much she should let Sango know. "He kissed me again. We kissed and stuff."

Sango shook her head. "What is going on with you? You have a boyfriend, Kagome. A boyfriend that you've been  _cheating_  on." She whispered the word, as if Hojou were right in the room with them. When Kagome didn't reply, she continued. "You know, I didn't say anything before because you needed to kiss Inuyasha to let him out of the mirror, but you weren't letting him out of the mirror this time."

"I know, I know!" Kagome said miserably. She looked up at Sango, ashamed. "The truth is, and I know this sounds awful, but I can't control myself. It's almost like… like I become someone completely different when he kisses me. I have never in my whole life felt like this before. I can't stop myself. I feel addicted."

Sango listened quietly, much to Kagome's relief, her head nodding along as she took everything in.

"That sounds… pretty intense. I can't say I've felt that way before. Is it different than Hojou?"

"Oh Sango, it's so different. Before all this happened, I really liked Hojou, and it was nice when he kissed me. But now… now it's like kissing a brother. I've lost the feelings I had, and I don't understand why." She could feel her eyes filling up with tears, and she blinked rapidly to hold them back. "I don't want to be this person. I want to go back to how I felt about Hojou before."

Sango reached out and placed her hand on Kagome's back rubbing in soothing circled. "Do you want to stay together with Hojou?"

Setting her jaw with determination, Kagome nodded. She  _did_  want to stay together with Hojou. She wasn't ready to give up what they had yet. She hated that the hanyou from the mirror made her mind go squishy and her body melt. She hated that she lost control around him.

"Okay then, if that's your decision, you have to stick with it. No more kissing Inuyasha. Although, we should probably figure out where he went. The most obvious place to look would be the mirror."

"You think he's back in the mirror?" Kagome asked, not having thought of that conclusion herself.

Sango shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe not. But do you have any better ideas on where to look?"

"If he hasn't just disappeared, and he  _is_  still in the mirror, I can't just leave him in there, trapped." It went against Kagome's very nature, leaving someone to rot, even if that someone made her feel uncomfortable about herself. Even if that someone was fundamentally dangerous.

"It's okay, we'll figure it out, I promise," She said, her comforting hand still in place.

Kagome shook her head. He could be anywhere, if he was still alive. But her friend was right, the mirror was the best place to look. "Okay, we'll have to go back to the museum again."

"But first – dealing with all this and Hojou. There are a few things you need to decide before you see him again. If you're set on staying with him, you cannot tell him about Inuyasha."

She opened her mouth to argue, hating the idea of lying to him, feeling even dirtier about the idea of covering it up. But Sango cut her off. "Kagome, it's not like Hojou would believe you anyway. Telling him that you've been getting hot and heavy with a magical youkai who's cursed to live in a mirror by an evil priestess will not go over well. He'll think you're crazy.  _I_  half believe you're crazy, and I've seen him with my own eyes."

Kagome cast her eyes down, her arguments deflating as soon as her mind conjured them up. Of course Hojou would never believe her.

"So if you're sure this is the route you're going to take, when you see him you have to act like nothing happened. We'll figure this whole thing out with getting Inuyasha out of the mirror again,  _if_  that's where he is, and that's a big  _if_. But then he's going to have to be on his own. And we'll just go back to school and be done with it."

Kagome straightened up in her seat then, Sango's strength seeping into her. "Okay. Okay, you're right, Sango. Thank you for being here for me. For listening to me."

"Oh, please Kagome," Sango said, standing from her bed and walking to her closet. "You've been my strength a million times since we first met. I'm just glad I can return the favor. You're very strong yourself."

"I don't feel very strong," Kagome said, frowning.

"You are. This whole ordeal just proves it, I think. Can you imagine what anyone else would do in your situation? What Eri or Yuka would do?"

Bringing up the other two girls that made up their in-school clique made Kagome giggle, she couldn't help it. "Eri and Yuka would have screamed, running for the hills the moment they saw Inuyasha step out from the mirror."

Sango joined in on her laughter. "It's true!"

"Ah, I'm so glad that you're my best friend, Sango." She watched as her friend blushed from the compliment.

"Me too." She said shyly. They gazed at each other, and Kagome was so, so thankful that Sango had been the one to help her open the stuck locker door she'd been assigned freshman year.

Finally, breaking the unspoken words of friendship between them, Sango thrust a shirt at her, and it smacked her in the face before landing in a crumpled heap at her lap. "Here, get dressed, we'll be late for school if we keep spewing our feelings all over the place.

Kagome groaned. Oh yeah. School.

.

.

"I can't look him in the eyes. I just can't." Kagome's heart pounded in her chest as she watched Hojou make his inevitable way towards her from the other side of the long hallway. He was a bit taller than everyone else, which is one of the things that had attracted her to him in the first place, other than his sweet smile and friendly disposition.

"Kagome, you're being ridiculous. We just talked about this." Sango sighed, exasperated.

"He's going to know. He's going to take one look at me and know."

"Jesus, get in here."

Kagome yelped as Sango pulled her into the girls' bathroom, effectively cutting them off from the chaos that was the high school hallway. She turned on her then, forcing her eyes to lock onto hers.

"Kagome. Breathe. He doesn't know. You told me that you want to stay together with Hojou, and I'm going to help you do that. But if you fall apart it's not going to work."

She inhaled deeply, calming her nerves. "I hate this. I hate myself right now."

"Inuyasha is a youkai, Kagome. I don't know if you're super attracted to him because he's one or not, but whatever the case, it's not your fault."

"But  _you're_  not attracted to him."

"Oh, the man is freaking gorgeous all right." Sango grinned. "He's super hot. But I haven't been kissing him."

"You think that's what did it? The kissing?"

Sango shrugged. "Maybe. He can spell people, you saw him do it the other night."

"You think he's  _spelling_  me?" Kagome squeaked out, her cheeks flushing.

"I can't know for sure, but that's not the issue right now. Right now you need to calm down and act like everything is normal. Breathe, Kagome. Breathe."

Following Sango's instructions, Kagome breathed. Her friend was right, at this very moment salvaging her relationship with Hojou was the most important thing. She grit her teeth and set her jaw, determination settling over her. She would not let some stupid magic hanyou spell her into ruining her normal, comfortable relationship. She had worked hard at getting Hojou's attention, and becoming friends with him over the years. She vividly remembered a time when she felt that she loved him so much her heart would explode. And although her attraction had waned due to Inuyasha showing up and making her…  _feel_  things, her attraction to Hojou had still been true. It had been solid. A fact. And more than anything right now she wanted it again.

"I'm ready," she said, her eyes locking firm onto Sango's. Nodding, Sango released her and followed behind as Kagome turned and pushed open the bathroom door.

Hojou was waiting at her locker, a few feet to the right. She turned on her heel and headed straight for him. She watched his face light up as he caught sight of her, watched as his expression slipped into shock as he noticed the resolve of her own features. He opened his mouth to mutter a 'hey', but she didn't let him get it out. Reaching out, she wrapped her hand around the back of his neck and pulled him down for a kiss. She refused to let herself think as she kissed him, her mouth working on auto pilot as she drove her tongue between his lips, demanding that he follow her lead.

Hojou didn't disappoint, wrapping his arm around her waist and dragging her to him after his initial shock at her boldness.

Kagome was aware of the stares of the shocked students surrounding them, but she ignored the whispers and continued her assault, refusing to give up until she was sure she was back to normal. After a few moments the students moved on, busy with their own lives, and her kisses turned softer, less needy. Hojou pulled away slightly, beaming down at her.

"What was  _that_  for?" He asked, not able to contain the giddy edge in his voice.

Kagome was suddenly hit with a brick of bashfulness, embarrassed at putting on such a show. She was glad the other students were somewhat ignoring them now, but she knew the kiss would be the gossip of school for the next few weeks.

"Umm, nothing," she said, breathless from exerting so much energy into the claiming of his lips. "Sorry, I just… wanted to kiss you."

"Don't apologize. In fact, do it more often, please." He said, winking down at her.

Kagome finally felt the beginnings of butterflies in the pit of her stomach, and she smiled shyly up at him. Thank God she was reacting even a little to his boyish charms. While the kiss hadn't been mind-blowing like with the hanyou, she'd stuck with her plan and she was sure it would pay off.

"Okay," she agreed, returning a smile of her own. Hojou swooped in and kissed her one more time before moving to the side so she could easily access her locker. Feeling lighter than she had since first stumbling upon all the trouble that was Inuyasha and his cursed mirror, Kagome relaxed into herself again, thankful for Hojou's easy-going attitude. She switched out her books and shut her locker, taking the hand he held out for her.

"Ready for lunch?" He asked, leading her down the hallway, while whistling a nonsensical tune.

"Yeah, I skipped breakfast, I'm pretty hungry."

"Why'd you skip?" He asked, genuinely curious.

"I spent the night at Sango's, she was helping me with my extra credit report." Which she hadn't done a damn thing about, now that she thought about it. Oh God, she had a day to write it all up and turn it in. She was going to be up all night again, on top of checking the museum for the hanyou.

"Well eat up, okay? You don't want to get sick." He bumped into her side, letting her know his words had no heavy meaning.

"Who's sick?" Sango asked, falling into place next to Kagome.

"No one yet," Hojou said. "I heard you and Kagome skipped breakfast this morning."

Kagome hoped Sango understood from her body language that she and Hojou were all good and well at this point. Luckily, her friends intuition was usually right on target, and Sango blended in effortlessly with the easygoing atmosphere.

"Yeah, it will be good to get something solid in." She said as they made their way to their usual table in the cafeteria and set their belongings down. "Hojou, why don't you go first? I have to go over an assignment with Kagome real quick."

"Sure thing," Hojou complied, and made his way to the lunch line where he met up with some of his friends.

"So?" Sango asked when he was out of earshot. "How did it go?"

Kagome let out a rush of air she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "Good. It went good. I feel a lot easier around him now."

"That was some kiss you gave him."

"Yeah, well…" She trailed off, embarrassed.

"Did you feel anything?"

She shrugged. "There weren't any sparks, if that's what you're asking. But I wasn't disgusted or anything. It was just a normal kiss. Although, I did feel something like I used to. You know, that butterfly feeling? He winked at me and I felt it."

"That's a good sign."

"Yeah, I hope it gets better though. I just want this to be over and done with."

"Well," Sango signed, "let's head to the museum right after school and check to see if Inuyasha's in the mirror. He should be able to signal you without anyone noticing, right?"

Kagome nodded, remembering the flash of his hand when he'd given her back her memories.

"Okay good. There's no reason to get stuck in the museum after-hours if he's not even there, right?"

"Right." The plan set, Kagome stood and made her way over to Hojou in the lunch line, trying to swallow the flood of nerves that suddenly sprang up. Maybe food would put her in a better mood.

 


	12. Resistance

 

Kagome

"What. The fuck. Took you so long?" Inuyasha growled.

Kagome folded her arms over her chest defensively. She and Sango had dropped by the museum after school, where they'd discovered that yes, Inuyasha was back nice and snug in the mirror. They'd had to wait hours at home, where Kagome had hurriedly written up her extra-credit report, before they could go back to the museum at closing time and sneak in the janitor's closet.

Kagome knew Inuyasha was going to be pissed off when he showed himself. She was prepared for that. Which is why her arms were folded defensively over her chest. She jutted out her bottom lip, determined to stay in control this time, no matter what happened. "We had school, Inuyasha," she explained, "and we could hardly get you out in the daytime. But we're here now, so what does it matter?" She tried not to think about his naked chest, or the way Sango's father's pants hung nicely off his hips.

"It fucking matters!" He yelled, pounding at the glass with his fist. Kagome bit her lip against arguing with him. She and Sango had a plan, and she was counting on the plan to keep her strong, to save her relationship with Hojou. She was sticking to the plan.

Sango stepped up then, purposely ignoring Inuyasha's outburst. "How'd you get back in the mirror? Kagome said you just disappeared."

Inuyasha's eyes shot to Kagome then, and she immediately looked away, blushing furiously. She pushed away the vivid memories of their tryst on the rooftop. She didn't dare look at him. She didn't know if she was strong enough to resist if she got caught up in the golden color of his eyes.

"Keh," he said. "I was pulled back in by one of Kikyou's sub-spells. Apparently, no matter where I am, the mirror sucks me back in at daybreak."

"Does that mean you can't be out of the mirror when it's daytime?"

"I assume so." He said. Kagome could feel the heat of his gaze on her.  _Don't look at him, don't look at him, don't look at him!_  She chided herself, keeping her eyes firmly planted on his feet.

"Well, how is this going to work then?" Sango asked, continuing her interrogation. "If you get sucked back into the mirror every time the sun rises, how will you have enough time to collect the jewel shards and weaken Kikyou?"

He didn't answer her, and the silence stretched on until Kagome was good and uncomfortable. She fought the urge to glance up and see what he was doing, but she  _knew_  he was still looking at her. She could  _feel_  it.

"Oi. Wench." He finally called, and Kagome felt herself flinch. "Look at me." He demanded.

She didn't move. She still didn't trust herself to be in control. And if he was spelling her by locking their eyes… she didn't want to chance it."

"Oi!" He barked again, but Sango cut him off this time.

"She's not feeling good today Inuyasha," she said simply. "Just answer the question, how is your plan going to work with you being sucked back into the mirror every day?"

Kagome heard him snort, and she glanced up at him only when she felt the heat of his gaze lessen. He was staring down Sango now, his brows knotted together. She tried to keep her eyes from wandering, from roaming luxuriously over his cute, furry ears, his long, luscious, silvery hair, his abs –  _who_  had abs like that? – like they were carved from stone. She tried to keep her eyes from wandering down, down, down to where his pants draped from his hips. She tried to keep her eyes from catching his happy trail, which started a few inches below his perfectly placed belly button.

She failed. Gnawing at her bottom lip she felt the familiar, intense need pool between her legs. Her cheeks betrayed her thoughts; she could feel herself flushing bright red. Somehow she was able to tear her gaze away and fix her eyes firmly on the ground. The image of him was burned into her retinas. She couldn't erase it, even when she closed her eyes.

 _Was_  he spelling her? What Sango said earlier made sense. How else could she explain the forceful, passionate feelings that overwhelmed her every time he was near? How could she explain her thoughts turning mushy and muddled? How could she explain her immediate, instant wetness? She subconsciously squeezed her thighs together, trying to ease some of the discomfort she felt.

"There's no way for me to break the spell…  _yet_ ," Inuyasha said. "But I think I know a way to take the mirror with me. Make it portable. That way I won't get sucked all the way back here every time the sun comes up."

Kagome mulled that over in her head, still gazing at the floor. That was good news! If he could make himself portable, then she wouldn't have to keep sneaking back into the museum and breaking him out. They could find Inuyasha someone else willing to help him get out of the mirror every night. There had to be  _one_  single, unattached girl out there who didn't mind kissing a deliciously scrumptious hanyou. She felt her eyes start to move up automatically, searching for another glimpse of him, and she immediately slammed them back to the floor. She had to stay strong.  _Hojou, think of Hojou_ , she chided herself.

Hojou, with his pale brown hair, pretty light brown eyes and easygoing smile… He was so cute, so sweet, and so human; completely and utterly opposite of everything Inuyasha was. Hojou liked her, he really did. He showed it in the things he said and the things he did. Staying with Hojou was the right thing to do. Hojou was comforting. She was used to herself around Hojou. Hojou was safe.

Inuyasha was anything but safe. Inuyasha was jagged glass, ready to slit her open and drink her life away if she slipped and fell. He was the spark of ignition, the gun, cocked back and ready to shoot if she tried to run. He didn't love her like Hojou loved her. But she had felt his  _need_  for her every time they touched. And just that one, single touch was what did her in every time.

 _Don't let him spell you, don't let him spell you_ , Kagome chanted while keeping an ear open to listen to Sango converse with the hanyou.

"Okay, we'll get you out so you can fix the mirror to take it with you." Sango said, stepping closer to the mirror. "All I have to do is kiss you, right?"

Kagome strained herself listening. Inuyasha didn't speak at first, and she wondered what he looked like right now, what his eyes were saying that his mouth was not.  _Don't look at him._  She demanded.

"Oi, wench," he called out. And she knew, she just  _knew_  he was speaking to her. "Oi!" He said again, injecting a growl into his words. "Look at me."

Kagome refused. She felt her legs shaking. The small quivers started at the tips of her toes and made their way up her thighs.

"Oi." He said, softer this time. "Ka-go-me."

It was like a punch to the gut, her name on his lips. She felt the wind rush out of her, and she knew she was going to give in. Her eyes darted up and locked onto his. Molten lava. The sun. Liquid gold. All rolled into one. His forearm rested against the other side of the glass, his other hand halfway through his hair. And she saw his resentment. His hate. Her eyes widened in reaction to his anger. It radiated from him in waves, crashing over her.

"What?" He sneered, his lips pulling back from his teeth. "Disgusted by what you see? Can't stand to even look at me anymore, much less kiss me my freedom?"

She opened her mouth to argue. Of  _course_  he didn't disgust her! Disgusted was the last thing she felt when she looked at him, when she kissed him.

He cut her off, whipping back to lock eyes with Sango. "Whatever, it doesn't fucking matter. Just get me the hell out of here, girl."

She snapped her mouth shut then. Maybe… maybe having him believe she was disgusted was better. So she watched, silent, as Sango stepped up to the mirror.

"It's Sango," she said.

"Yes, I know your fucking name. Get me out."

"Please?" She asked, a mock smile on her face.

" _Please_." He growled.

Kagome stood and watched as Sango put her hands up to the mirror, leaned in and pressed her lips to the glass. There was a strange drop in the pit of her stomach, and it took a few seconds to realize it was the beginning spark of jealousy. She didn't  _want_  Sango to kiss Inuyasha, that was something  _she_  did.  _She_  stumbled upon him in the middle of the night first.  _She_  was the one that he'd asked for help.

 _What the hell are you thinking? This is_ good _, this is to save your relationship with Hojou!_  She bit her tongue against her conflicting emotions, and watched as Inuyasha leaned down, slowly matching his lips to Sango's. Any moment now, she'd see him step out of the mirror, like magic.

Any moment now…

Five seconds went by, then ten. Nothing happened. Sango and Inuyasha stood on opposite sides of the glass, looking like some artist's abstract painting of a reflection. Finally they both pulled back, stumped.

"It didn't work?" Sango asked, looking up at Inuyasha, then back at Kagome, shrugging.

"I don't get it. What did we do different?" Inuyasha mused, bringing his hand up to cup his chin, lost in thought.

"Did you guys kiss differently? Use tongue or something?"

"Sango!" Kagome hissed, flushing bright red.

Sango rolled her eyes and waved her hand at Kagome's griping.

"I didn't think about it, but it make's sense," Inuyasha said, glancing between the two girls. He cursed. "Try it one more time, Sango, maybe I'm wrong."

Sango shrugged, a flirtatious smile playing on her lips. "Inuyasha, if you  _want_  to kiss me, you need only ask."

His eyes widened, then he grinned back. "Keh," he said. "Come here."

 _What the hell is she doing?_  Kagome seethed on the inside. Sango was supposed to be helping her with her Inuyasha problem, not  _flirting_  with the half-youkai sex-god. She grit her teeth and resisted the urge to pull Sango away from the mirror. This was a good thing, she shouldn't care who Inuyasha kissed. It shouldn't bother her. She watched, heart pounding wildly in her chest and they leaned in again, pressing their lips onto the glass.

No magical glowing, no hanyou stepping out of the mirror. Sango and Inuyasha both pulled back again. He knotted his eyebrows and shook his head. His eyes slipped to Kagome.

"Sorry." He said, his voice flat. "Looks like you're it."

"What do you mean, she's it?" Sango asked.

"It looks like Kagome's the only one who can kiss me free. I thought that might be the case, but I had to be sure."

"Why do you think that?"

He shrugged. "Another of Kikyou's sub-spells perhaps? Maybe she's spelled it so that she can only free me. And your friend being her doppelganger…" He let the rest hang.

Kagome felt her heart quicken at the idea that she  _was_  somehow special in all this. That he needed her, not anyone else, to help him. But then her stomach dropped, realizing what it meant. She didn't think she'd be able to control herself if she kissed him. Of course.  _Of course_  she'd be the only one able to free him from the mirror. Dread crept over her. She stayed rooted in place as Sango walked over, reaching for her hand.

"It's okay," she mouthed. "Just think about Hojou. Do it quick."

Nodding, trying to quell the shaking in her hands, she moved towards the mirror, her eyes locked firmly on the ground in front of her feet, until she was right in front of him. She could see his bare feet, half-hidden under the pants he'd borrowed from Sango's father. If she closed her eyes while she kissed him, if she refrained from looking at him at all,  _maybe_  she could get through it.  _Hojou… think of Hojou…_

"Still can't look at me, wench?" Inuyasha snapped, and she winced at the bitterness in his voice. He moved, too quick for her to see. He was suddenly in front of her, sitting on his haunches, his eyes level with her own. As soon as her gaze locked to his, she was lost. Soft eyes and brown hair faded to golden and silvery platinum. Inuyasha filled her to the brim. He pierced through her. She felt naked in front of him, like he could read her very soul.

Slowly, she leaned in, heart racing, blood boiling in her veins. She pressed her lips to the cool glass, now a familiar sensation, as her eyes drifted shut.

His lips were warm against her, and there was that feeling again, that warmth that was so addicting, that spread through her like fire. His shoulders were free, then his hands, and he wrapped his fingers around her shoulders as he stepped fully from the mirror. Sighing into him, melting at his touch, Kagome opened her mouth to him, inviting him in.

He ripped away from her suddenly, digging into her shoulders before pushing her violently to the ground. She shrieked as she landed on her backside, eyes wide, staring up at him, shocked. "Wha-?" She asked.

"Hey!" Sango shouted, running to her friend's side. She placed a comforting hand on Kagome's shoulder. "What was that for?"

Inuyasha ignored her, keeping his eyes fixed on Kagome. "Wouldn't want to have you kissing me too long," he spat. "Since I disgust you and all." The he turned and walked back to the mirror to study the frame.

She sat there, mouth agape, on the floor in the middle of the museum. Why was he so pissed off at her? It wasn't fair! She wasn't acting this way because she  _wanted_  to, it wasn't her fault she couldn't control all these new, extreme emotions. It wasn't like she'd been asked to be dragged into any of this. She'd been  _happy_  before her life started to fall apart.

In fact, the way she saw it, it was  _his_  damn fault that she was acting like this. If he wasn't such a damn good kisser, moaning into her mouth and grinding up against her, she wouldn't be all messed up in the head! If he hadn't shown himself to her in the first place, she'd have gone on her merry way, doing things like homework and dating her boyfriend. Did he think she  _wanted_  to be here, in the middle of the night, in a deserted museum, setting him free from his stupid magic spell?  _Again_. How dare he act all offended, as if she'd done something to insult him? He'd been insulting  _her_  constantly since he first showed himself to her! Well, screw him, she wasn't going to take anymore of his crap.

Pushing Sango's hand away, she stood on shaky feet, took two very angry steps towards him and folded her arms. "Hey." She said. "What is your problem?"

" _My_  problem?" He growled, spinning on his heel to face her. "I don't have a fucking problem,  _you're_  the one that can't stand to fucking  _look_  at me, much less touch me."

"I'm looking at you  _now_ , aren't I?" She exclaimed.

"Oh yeah, good for you, I'd give you a pat on the head like a good little girl if I didn't think you'd vomit from the contact."

"Now wait just a minute, I-"

"No,  _you_  fucking wait a minute. You don't have to make excuses, I know what you are. Fucking racist bitch."

Kagome reared back as if he'd just slapped her. "R- _Racist_?!" She shrieked, disbelief coloring her features. " _Racist_?"

"Yeah," he growled, taking another step towards her. "Racist. You don't have to fucking hide that you think I'm a monster. It's not the first time I've had someone react that way about me being half-human or half-youkai." He shook his head in disgust. "Have to say though, I thought you were better than that."

"I-I-I'm not a racist!" She exclaimed, following him as he turned and stalked back to the mirror. "Hey- hey!" She cried, reaching up and grabbing a handful of his hair, attempting to tug his head toward her. He didn't budge, of course.

"Just… Just go stand with your friend and let me work." He snapped, refusing to look at her.

Dejected and horrified at the very thought of her being  _racist_ , Kagome turned and obeyed him, stomping her anger out as she made her way to where Sango stood. "I am  _not_  a racist." She seethed.

"Of course you're not." She agreed, patting her on the arm. She dropped her voice then, whispering directly into Kagome's ear. "So how was it?"

"How was what?" Kagome whispered back.

"The kiss! Did it work? Were you able to resist? Even a little?"

She felt herself flush again. She was doing that a lot tonight. Biting her lip, she shook her head. "It's useless. As soon as I look at him, I'm done for."

Sango nodded. "It's too bad the mirror didn't work for me. It would have been a good test to determine if he was spelling you or not."

Smart Sango.

"Oi, stand back." Inuyasha called over his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" Sango asked.

"Just get back a couple of feet, I'm breaking this damn thing."

"Um…" Kagome spoke up. "You're breaking it? Is that safe?"

"Keh!" He spat, still refusing to look her way. "If I work fast enough it should be. Now will you two move back or do I have to pick you up like a couple of baby girls and  _put_  you where you need to be?"

Rolling her eyes, Kagome gripped Sango's wrist and led her further away from the mirror.

Inuyasha walked nonchalantly over to the display to the right of the mirror. It was the hilt of a sword, the blade having been broken off years and years ago. He reached out and picked it up out of the display case before walking with the same careless strut back to the mirror.

"Uh, I'm pretty sure you just tripped like, a dozen silent alarms." Sango informed him.

"Doesn't matter." He waved her words away. Then he sucked in a sharp breath of air and raised the sword hilt behind his head. "Here goes nothing," Kagome heard him mutter as he brought the sword hilt around in an arch, like the swing of a baseball bat.

It struck the mirror with so much force the air around her shook. Glass shot out around him as it broke into dozens of pieces, all different sizes. They clattered to the ground, and quickly, without saying a word, Inuyasha reached up and gripped both hands around the bottom right corner of the frame. It bent and twisted under his grip, and he ripped the two sides apart, repeating the same on the top right corner, coming away with a long, thin side of the frame. Haphazardly stepping around the glass he found one of the bigger pieces and plucked it out of the pile, moving to a clear area before setting it down. His ears twitched, and he sighed.

"Here they come." He said.

 


	13. The Solution

 

Kagome

"Here they come." Inuyasha muttered, placing the large piece of glass and frame on the floor and stretching his arms out above his head as he stood.

Kagome could hear the guards now, their heavy footsteps and jangling keys echoing loudly off the walls. A few seconds later she caught sight of the bobbing flashlights as they made their way down the stairs and rounded the corner. Inuyasha walked past to head them off, mumbling his spell words as he went. The guard nearest to him took out his baton, gripping it in his right hand while holding his left out in front of him.

"S-stay right there!" He called, eyes widening as he took in Inuyasha's unusual features.

Inuyasha didn't stop, he moved right towards him, even when the guard raised his baton, ready to strike him down. He lashed is hand out, his clawed fingers wrapping around the steel, and crunched it in his hands.

Kagome shivered, her mind flashing back to the rooftop, where those same hands had been oh-so-gentle, she now realized; those same hands that could crush steel to pieces. He'd pushed those fingers of his up inside her, filled her with them for only seconds before-

"He's doing it again," Sango whispered, and Kagome was yanked back to the present. Inuyasha was looking at both the guards now, his words specific and direct. He ordered them to calm down, that they had called him here themselves for maintenance on the mirror, and that they wanted watch him work, which he would happily allow them to do. That same sort of glazed look settled over both guards, and they agreed readily.

Inuyasha turned and walked past the girls again, his eyes locking onto Kagome. She felt that familiar hitch in her breath when their gaze met, and she wondered, is that how he spelled her? Was he saying something to her to make her feel this way? Did she get that same, empty, I'll-do-what-you-say air about her when she felt overly compelled to kiss him? To run her hands up his chest and into his hair?

She would have to ask Sango later, when Inuyasha was off doing whatever it was he needed to do and she could get her friend alone. She frowned, her eyes still fastened to him. She didn't think she acted like the guards. Sango would have mentioned it. But then again, what was stopping him from spelling Sango too? How could they ever really know? What was to stop Inuyasha from erasing people's memories, just like Kikyou had erased hers?

He ripped his gaze away from her then, rolling his eyes as he passed by and muttering an agitated "Keh," before kneeling down in front of the giant glass shard and continuing his work.

He still thought she was judging him. What a jerk. As if the word racist could ever be described when it came to her! The idea was absolutely absurd. She wanted to rip his hair out and pull on his ears for thinking that of her. She wanted to tell him that she was the least racist person in the whole world. But then how could she explain her sudden unwillingness to look at him? She did  _not_ , in a million years, want to admit that she was so attracted to him she felt she might break apart at any moment.

Inuyasha started speaking again, words she couldn't understand this time, and she recognized it as the same strange language Kikyou had used when re-spelling him back into the mirror, the same strange language he'd used on the guards both times. It didn't sound like any language she was currently aware of. It was off somehow. Alien. Inuyasha had said it was an ancient language when he was out last, but that couldn't be the only different thing about those words. She could almost  _feel_  the power as he spoke. She shivered.

The air stirred around her as Inuyasha's voice carried on, gathering around him and whipping hair up off his back, giving the impression of weightlessness. He bent the golden frame around the piece of mirror he'd picked out, the lettering etched into the gold glowing, just as she remembered from their first meeting. The frame stuck to the mirror, and the air died down. He gave a shout of triumph and stood, picking up the mirror and holding it out at arms length, giving it a good once-over.

"Looks about right," he said, turning back to both girls with a grin on his face. "I think this might actually work."

"Great. Now what?" Sango asked, jamming her hands into her pockets.

"Now we get out of here. With the mirror, of course." He walked up to the guards, who waited patiently for his next command. "All done here, everything looks good. You'll let us out."

"Come on, I'll let you guys out." The guard said, his partner nodding enthusiastically.

Shaking her head, Sango rolled her eyes to Kagome and took her hand. They trailed along behind Inuyasha, who whistled blissfully, following the guards out. "You will go back to work and forget we were here. Erase the security tapes," he said as they stepped outside.

"Have a nice night now," the guard said, waving cheerfully, and then he was gone, back inside the museum.

"Well," Sango said. "I guess that's that. What are you going to do now?"

"Keh," he said, placing the bottom of the mirror down and leaning against it for support. "What do you mean, 'what am I going to do now'? I'm going after the jewel shards of course."

"I see. Okay, well, what's your plan for getting out of the mirror again come tomorrow night?"

He frowned, "I don't get what you're saying. Kagome is going to let me out again come tomorrow night."

"Er-" Kagome started to speak, but Sango jumped in for her.

"Kagome has school and family. She can't go with you."

His eyebrows shot up at her blunt words. "Oh really?"

"Yes, really. So unless you plan on keeping yourself in her bedroom closet during the daytime, you're going to have to come up with another plan."

"There  _is_  no other plan," he hissed. "She's the only one who can release me. You can't do it, no one else can do it. She can!" He whipped a sharp claw out to point at Kagome.

"If you think for one second that you can just-"

"Oi, shut up, bitch, this has nothing to do with-"

"Bitch?!" Sango exclaimed, fisting her hands at her at her side and falling into a stance. "I'll show you what a bitch is. I don't care if you're half-youkai, I'll kick your ass!"

He pulled his lips over his teeth, his grin showing his fangs, extending his claws. "I'd like to see you try, you-"

"Hey – HEY!" Kagome shouted, stamping her foot for good measure. Both Sango and Inuyasha whipped their heads around to glare at her. "Stop it! This is ridiculous, there's no point in killing each other over-"

"Keh," Inuyasha interrupted. "Like some mere human could even  _hope_  to kill me."

"I said  _shut it_." Kagome fumed, stepping in between them and glairing up at Inuyasha. "Listen, I'm sorry you've got all this… this  _crap_  going on, but  _I can't help you_. I've got school and a family and a boyfriend, and honestly, I don't think I can handle whatever it is you think I need to do. So good luck, I'm going home."

He pulled his head back then, shocked.

Feeling somewhat empowered at her bravery for facing him head-on, Kagome grabbed onto Sango's arm and dragged her away. She could feel herself shaking. She'd done it! She'd looked him in the eyes and practically  _shouted_  at him and she'd somehow resisted the urge to throw herself at him. In fact, for a few seconds, she'd been so angry that all thoughts of his lips or his abs or his golden eyes had completely disappeared.

"Good Job, Kagome," Sango muttered, falling into place next to her, "but next time let me pound him."

Kagome smiled at her best friend. Sango's family were descended from a long line of martial-artists, and it was the one sport her parents had insisted that she and her brother Kohaku participate in, just as her father had, and his father before him, and his father before him. Sango still trained daily, and toured around the country participating in tournaments, which Kagome always thought was the coolest thing in the entire world. Still, it probably would have done no good again Inuyasha's youkai side.

"Not that I don't appreciate you sticking up for me," Kagome reassured, "but I'd rather not see Inuyasha rip your head off."

"Yeah, well-" Sango started as they turned the corner, walking towards their neighborhood, and then froze, her eyes wide, mouth open.

Kagome mimicked her expression. Inuyasha stood in front of them, looking pissed, the mirror tucked under his left arm. How had he gotten in front of them? She hadn't seen him pass them at all.

"Don't think for one second," he seethed, stepping closer, his eyes glued to Kagome, "that I can't fucking track you down wherever you go. You're not getting away from me, wench."

Sango immediately pushed Kagome behind her, fists coming up and dropping into a stance again. "Back off." She hissed.

"This doesn't fucking concern you." He spat, narrowing his eyes at her. "You're like a fucking gnat: you're annoying. Get out of my way."

"You get out of  _our_  way!" Kagome demanded over Sango's shoulder. She wished she'd had her friend teach her some self-defense. She certainly did not feel as confident as Sango did at the moment.

He paused, then grinned, stepping to the side. Both girls tensed, as if waiting for a trap to spring, but he only swept his hand around, gesturing them to walk by. Slowly, Sango keeping herself between Kagome and Inuyasha, they moved past him.

"Keep walking," Sango muttered, keeping her eyes on the hanyou.

Would he really attack them? Kagome wouldn't have thought so, but she didn't really know him. He could be completely unbalanced, totally insane, and how would she know? Anger swept through her, that she had gotten herself so deep into all this. And now Sango was involved too! She wished more than anything that she'd gone straight to security that night, instead of hiding from them. Now that she thought about it, they probably would have believed her. The security tapes had probably caught Hiromi's attack. They probably would have simply called her parents and let her out. She was so stupid.

"Fuck," Sango bit out.

"What?" Kagome tensed for an attack.

"He's actually  _following_  us."

She sneaked a peek over Sango's shoulder to see that he was indeed following them. He strutted along a few feet behind, whistling that same nonsensical tune like he didn't have a care in the world.

"What are we going to do?" She asked, reaching out to grip Sango's hand. "He's going to follow me home."

Sango huffed. "No he's not, we'll go to my place again. Kohaku's there and he's just as good as I am. We'll be safer."

Kagome worried at her bottom lip, still not convinced. "I don't know, Sango, maybe we should just go to the police."

She shook her head once, sharp. "No. They won't believe us, and I highly doubt he'll show himself anyway. They'll think we're drunk. Or crazy."

"Okay, but-"

" _Kagome_ ," Sango said, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I trust you." She replied without hesitation.

Okay then, try to relax a little. I have a plan, but I need you level headed. Come on," she bumped her shoulder playfully, "you're usually braver than this. Where's the Kagome I'm used to?"

"Sorry, It's just… I'm still overwhelmed."

Sango frowned. "I know. But we got through letting Inuyasha out of the mirror and you were fine. Although, I'm not sure we should have let him out at all, now"

Kagome agreed.

"However," she continued, "at lease we know he'll be stuck again in the morning."

Oh, she hadn't thought of that! So they just had to get through tonight. Feeling strengthened by her best friend, Kagome nodded. It took a few minutes more to get to Sango's, and Inuyasha kept pace with them, whistling the whole way.

Approaching the last few feet to Sango's house, both girls sprinted towards the front door, Kagome leaping to the side as Sango slammed the door shut and locked it with both the knob lock and deadbolt. She placed her back against the wood as they took a second to catch their breath.

Kagome could hear Kohaku in the family room, playing a video game. Some sort of fighting game from the sound of it. He must have heard the front door slam, because he appeared a few moments later.

"Hey sis, what's up?" He asked, shooting a curious glance Kagome's way.

"Kohaku, help Kagome lock all the windows. I'll get the back door." Sango ordered.

He stiffened immediately, understanding that something was wrong. "What happened?"

"Just do it. Quick." Sango pushed off the door and headed towards the kitchen, and without questioning any further, Kohaku started towards the family room windows.

"Kagome, get the ones upstairs." He said.

Nodding, Kagome took the steps two at a time, starting with the bathroom window, which was the first door to the right. She made her way down the hall, going in and out of the rooms, locking each window as quickly as she could.

 _It won't make much difference locked or not, you saw what he did to that mirror, you saw what he did to the guards steel weapon,_  her inner voice pestered, but she pushed it away as she entered Sango's parent's bedroom, heading towards the window. It was true, wooden doors and glass would not keep him out, but locking everything made her feel better anyway. And it helped to squelch the fear of what he might try to do.

Sango entered the room just as she finished the last lock, heading for her parent's closet.

"What are you doing?" Kagome asked, moving to stand in the closet doorway.

She glanced at her as she searched the top shelf with her hands. "I'm looking for my dad's handgun."

It was Kagome's turn to stiffen. "What? A gun? Do you think you should-"

"Regular martial arts weapons aren't going to do much to him, even my Hiraikotsu probably won't do much damage." Sango snapped, her hands finding the box she was looking for. She pulled it off the shelf. It was black and secured with a padlock. "I might not be able to knock him out with my fists, but I  _know_  the bastard won't be immune to bullets." She carried the case to the bed and dropped it on the comforter, spinning the lock to the correct numbers and popping it open. "Don't worry, I've been taking shooting lessons for years now."

"How can you be sure it will work?" Kagome asked, "What if it doesn't injure him? What if he's like Superman, where bullets just bounce off him?"

Sango picked up the handgun. It was sleek and black, and Kagome shivered at the sight of it. Guns had always made her uncomfortable, and this was her first time seeing one so up close. She watched as her friend checked for bullets, cocked it back and released the safety, turning to lock eyes with Kagome.

"This isn't make-believe, and that asshole is not a superhero. Youkai bleed just like the rest of us."

Kagome's breath hitched in her throat. Sango was  _so fucking cool_. Glad to have Sango as a friend rather than an enemy, Kagome nodded. "I have to finish the windows in your room." She said.

Sango nodded. "Let's go." And followed Kagome out of the door.

The last room at the end of the hallway was Sango's and Kagome reached for the knob, opening the door and stepping inside. She screamed when she came face-to-face with a very angry Inuyasha.

He stood with his legs set, his body seeming to fill up the room. The mirror was propped up against Sango's bed, leaving his arms free. They were crossed over his chest as he glared down at her.

"This game is getting fucking tiring." He growled.

"Kagome, back!" Sango shouted as she thrust herself between them, raising her gun like a professional, pointing it at his chest.

Inuyasha made no movement to get out of the way. His eyes shot daggers down at her. "And what the fuck do you think you're going to do to me with that stupid thing?" He growled.

"If you move, you're dead." She explained.

"Keh." He reached out with his left hand to grab the weapon. Sango whipped it two centimeters to the right and fired.

The sound was defining. Kagome clapped her hands over her ears as they rang, eyes wide, sickened by the spurt of blood that shot from his right bicep.

"FUCK!" He roared, clapping his uninjured hand over the wound. Blood oozed out between his fingers. Kagome watched as that same blood red color seeped into the whites of his eyes. She took a step back, terrified. She'd never heard of that side-effect from a gunshot before.

"Next one's in your head, asshole." Sango said.

He growled and knocked the gun out of her hands. It went flying across the room and thumped against the wall, falling to the floor, useless. His hand went for her throat next, and he picked her up by it and slammed her back into the wall, her feet dangling off the ground.

"Sango!" Kagome screamed, hearing the crack of Sango's skull, watching her friend struggle against his steel grasp.

"What happened?" Kohaku shouted, darting into the room. He froze, mouth falling open at the scene in front of him; the blood oozing from Inuyasha's arm, Sango's struggle to free herself so she could breathe. "Let go of my sister!" He cried, launching himself at the hanyou.

"Kohaku, no!" Kagome reached for him but he was too quick. He went for Inuyasha's eyes, his fingers coming together to form the shape of a spear, lashing out at his target.

Inuyasha reached out with his injured arm and gripped Kohaku by the back of his shirt, lifting him off the floor and tossing him onto the bed like a rag doll. Kagome's eyes darted to the gun, left forgotten in the corner of the room. If she could just get to it… She moved slowly, hoping he'd be too focused on Sango to notice…

"Hold it." He growled, red eyes searing into her. "If you fucking touch that idiotic contraption, I'll come for you next." He promised. She stopped, glaring at him. How had it come to this?

"Now," he said, taking in a deep, calming breath. Kagome watched with fascination as the red started to receded from his eyes, again becoming the golden color she was accustomed to. "Everybody calm the fuck down, and listen to what I have to say."

"...If you want to live, that is." He added with a menacing grin.

 


	14. Bound By Power, Destroyed by Rage

Kikyou

Kikyou stood in her bedroom naked as the day she was born. She stood in the very center, which was marked by a large, white circle painted on the hardwood floor. A pedestal had been welded there, and the wide basin at the top was filled to the brim with fine-grained sand. So fine was this sand that it felt like powder as it filtered through her fingers.

She let the sand drain completely from her hands before she pushed them back into the basin, sifting her fingers through and picking up another handful. This time she let her pupils un-focus, and her bedroom blurred in front of her eyes. And as the sand trickled slowly back into the basin, she was suddenly back, three hundred years in the past, a visitor to her own timeline.

She could still feel the sand slipping through her fingers, but her bedroom was gone, and her modern attire was gone, and the world had changed completely around her. She wore her priestess robes again, her trusted bow and quiver of arrows slung over her shoulder and snug at her back. She had been walking down a familiar path when she'd slipped unnoticed into her own skin, and she watched through her own eyes as she continued down the mountainside.

She was on her way back to the village, to meet up with her elder sister, Kaede, with a fresh supply of herbs and medicinal flower stems. She could hear herself humming a tune, one her dearly departed mother had sung to her and her sister when they had been children. The path began to even out as she neared the village, and she felt her heart speed up as Inuyasha's familiar aura passed through her.

He was waiting for her, a few feet before the forest broke into the clearing, leaning against a giant, solid tree as she came upon him, his arms crossed, that familiar, confident smirk on his face. He broke out into a grin as she neared.

"Hey you," he said, a soft edge to his tone that he only reserved for when speaking to her.

This particular meeting was one of Kikyou's favorite memories, one that she had sifted back through time to experience again and again. Inuyasha did things to her. The sound of his voice and the way his eyes pierced through her and the shock of intense need every time he touched her practically drove her mad. She never quite had the control she was so used to when he was around. It made her nervous. It also made her so incredibly aroused she felt she might fall apart at the seams.

This time was no different. Dressed in that dirty fire-rat coat he loved so much, his feet bare and his sword resting snug at his hip, he moved towards her with grace only youkai possessed, his ears twitching, his grin playful.

"What are you doing here?" She heard herself ask. Even though Kikyou knew of the events that were about to play out, she still felt the unsettled nerves of her past self. Past Kikyou had worried endlessly about spending too much time around the hanyou, worried about what others would think, even though it was a struggle for her to keep away, the pull towards him too great to ignore.

"What do you think I'm doing here? I caught your scent about halfway down the mountain, I figured I'd head you off here before you go back and do whatever boring things it is you do for the villagers." He stepped closer.

"Inuyasha, we have to be careful, if we're seen-"

"No one will see us, everyone is out in the fields, and your sister is holed up in your hut." His ears twitched atop his head. "Oh, and there's a group of men out hunting for dinner, but they won't head this way," he added.

Kikyou sighed and tried to side-step him. She was having a hard time, as always, refusing his advances, which made her try harder. "Inuyasha, can you not wait until our agreed time of meeting? It's only three days until-"

"I can't wait three days," he interrupted her again, moving to cut her off. He swept her up into his arms, and pressed his lips against her.

She felt that familiar shock, that absolute need as her feet lifted off the ground. He had her arms pinned at her sides in his bear hug, she couldn't wiggle them free. Captive against him, she melted, letting him take what he wanted.

Present Kikyou could feel it all. This was the reason why she came back again and again, reliving this moment as many times as she could. She let her past self's emotions run through her. It was like a drug, these feelings, and she was an addict in her present, an addict cut off forever from her addiction.

That's why she came back to these moments. To get high again. To feed her addiction.

Her past self was lost in these feelings, in Inuyasha's arms. Growling, the hanyou wrapped his clawed fingers around her bottom and brought her legs to wrap around his hips, walking her further back into the trees, where the dense foliage would provide better cover for them.

He pushed her back up against a tree, carefully – he was always so careful with her – and kissed her breath away. Quick kisses mixed with deep, intense, soul-probing kisses, and his hands roamed, teasing her in a way she'd grown accustomed to. Yet she started to sense something different this time. Inuyasha's movements were urgent – desperate almost. His hands reached to her waist ties and he hesitated only a second before he started to work deftly at the knots.

Kikyou broke away then, head tilting back to look into his eyes. "What are you doing, Inuyasha?" She asked, breathless.

"Keh," he murmured, eyes showing everything that was tender about him, so different from the rash, destructive, uncontrollable brat she'd first met two years ago. "I can't stand it anymore, Kikyou. I want to claim you. I want other youkai to know that you are mine."

She felt herself frown, and she tried to detangle herself from him, but his hands tightened on her hips, holding her in place. "Inuyasha, you cannot claim me, not as you are now."

His face fell slightly, his smile sad. "I know you're worried about your purity-" he started.

"Of  _course_  I'm worried about my purity," she cut him off. They'd had this conversation now what had to be a hundred times. "If I mate with you as you are now, I will lose my priestess-hood. I will lose my purity and my power."

"But you don't know that for  _sure_." He insisted stubbornly, still keeping her in place. His bottom lip pushed out, and he somewhat resembled a pouting child.

"The risk is too great," she pleaded with him, willing him to understand. "Which is why when I finally defeat Naraku and the jewel is purified we can use it to change you, to make you fully human. And  _then_  you can claim me."

Reluctantly, he slowly let her slip to the ground, placing her gently on her feet. "I still don't like it. A claiming by a human male is not the same as a claiming by a youkai, or even a hanyou. You will not be protected from advances by other youkai, and a claiming certainly won't stop human men. Plus," he bit at his bottom lip, showing a fang, "I can't protect you very well as a human. I'm too weak."

Smiling, Kikyou reached up and placed her hand against his cheek. "I can protect us well enough, Inuyasha. I am very powerful."

"I know you are," he said. "But I am the man, I should be doing the protecting. I cannot sit on the side while you risk your life to protect mine."

"Hush now," she said. "You told me you love me. Did you mean your words?"

"Of course I did," he replied without hesitation.

"Then prove it to me by waiting to become human. If you love me, if you truly love me as I love you, you will become human so as not to rob me of my powers. If you truly love me, you will wait to claim me."

He exhaled, slow and powerful and impatient. He nodded once.

"Good," Kikyou purred, releasing his face and moving her hand down to the hardness pressed against his hakama, and pushed her palm to him, rubbing up and down, creating friction. "Let us do as we've been doing Inuyasha. It is enough for me right now. I love you. Let me show you." And she wrapped her hand around him, hakama and all, and pumped at his erection through his clothing.

He let out a hiss of pleasure before capturing her lips.

This was it, this was the moment present Kikyou came back to feel alive for. She melted as Inuyasha brought his own hand down to the apex of her thighs, his thumb finding the little nub that made her feel so deliciously alive and created friction of his own.

Pleasure mounted inside of her, and she panted into his mouth, kissing him with everything she had.

He came first, crying out her name and releasing himself into his hakama. Panting, his orgasm leaving his legs wobbly, he knelt to the ground in front of her, pressing his mouth against that same little nub, sucking and nipping at it through her clothing. His fingers probed at her through the rough material, and with this, she finally, finally rose to her peek and then-"

" _Lady Kikyou_."

Instantly she was ripped away from her body, her vision blurring, disconnecting from the past and forced into the present. She was back in her room, inside the white, painted circle, the last few bits of sand falling between her fingers and dropping into the basin. Her present body ached without release. Rage filled her. She whipped her head around to glare at the human male she considered her right hand. Her lackey. Her pet. She wanted to throttle him.

His head was bowed, his knees tucked under, his dark hair covering his eyes. "Lady Kikyou," he said again from his position on the floor. He didn't move. He knew better. He had been with her long enough to realize what he'd done was almost unforgivable.

"What," she asked, her voice icy and flat, "is so important that you interrupt me while I sift time?"

"Lady Kikyou, my work for tonight is done."

"And?"

"And everything went as planned, as it always does."

Stepping away from the basin, Kikyou grabbed a bathrobe she had discarded on her bed earlier and covered her nudity before approaching the man, placing her fingers on his head. "Arise."

He did as he was told, standing a good six inches over her; his eyes, which had long since lost their disobedient spark, were kept firmly glued to the floor. His staff jingled as he rose, the noise echoing off the walls. He kept his right hand closed firmly into a fist, his prayer beads clutched in his grip.

Reaching up, she wrapped her fingers around the short ponytail he kept at the base of his neck, yanking his head back and pushing him closer to her, forcing his eyes to meet hers. She stared long and hard into those eyes. They were the loveliest shade of violet. Never before had she met anyone with that particular color. Perhaps that is why she was so fond of the monk. Other than his wonderful, powerful, cursed hand of course. And the fact that his exorcism powers were actually legitimate, which was hard to find these days amongst all the fakes.

"Miroku," she purred, "I still do not understand why you could not wait until my sifting was over and I was satisfied. You would have found me in a much better mood." She pulled back and slapped him hard across the face. Normally it wouldn't have done much, but Kikyou wasn't normal, and putting some powerful 'oomph' into the slap gave her the edge she needed. When he turned to face her again his lip had split open and a trickle of blood oozed its way down his chin.

"I'm very sorry, my lady," he said, without the barest hint of remorse in his voice. His eyes, so lovely, gazed at her as they always had: with absolute hate.

"Dearest monk," she said, keeping her grip on his hair tight as she wiped the trickle of blood away with her thumb. "I do wish that you would just relax a bit. You might even enjoy your duties to me then."

"I enjoy them my lady," he lied.

Kikyou rolled her eyes, releasing his head with a shove before turning and stalking back to the basin. "It is almost midnight. Prepare for our departure to the mirror."

"As you wish." Was all he said before turning on the spot and disappearing in a whirl of purple robes and the jangle of his staff.

Kikyou moved towards her closet to get dressed. She always made sure to look her best in front of Inuyasha. She wanted to remind him every time he saw her what he was missing. What he had lost when he had betrayed her all those years ago.

It was all part of keeping things under her control. She had been since she could remember, and her need for it had grown as her powers had. Once she had defeated Naraku those three hundred years past and taken the jewel, and Inuyasha had turned his back on her, what could she do but take control of everything herself?

And that's exactly what she had done. Taken control. Used the jewel not to turn Inuyasha human as originally planned, but to boost her power, to make sure that  _no one_  could betray her again. To make sure that the plan she foresaw for the future of humanity was kept firmly under her thumb. She was, in most terms of the word, a God. With her abilities at the level they were and with her capability to sift through time, she, in essence, was the one guiding the path the human race must follow in order to survive.

And although her addiction to Inuyasha caused her to crave her past memories, enough to go back and relive them over and over again, she knew he was only that: an addiction. And there was simply no such thing as an addiction that was good for you.

Youkai, and yes, hanyou too, would be the downfall of the human race. She knew this to be fact. Absolute. Like the sun would always rise, like the tide would never cease to ebb and flow, she knew that youkai were to bring humans to ruin. So she protected the human race as if they were her own children, and in a way, they were.

And so be it if she had to kill youkai. So be it if she had to take control of certain beings, both human and youkai, to do some of the work she could not do herself? Over the years many youkai had fallen to her hands, and many had been used for a good purpose as well.

Inuyasha had been the first, though. The first youkai, even if only half of one, to be used for her greater purpose. He was what sustained her power, and her power was what sustained her immortality. She did not age. She did not die. And it was because of this certain mirror spell, with the one and only youkai she had ever felt anything towards other than hate, that she had to keep going back to re-work her spell over and over again every week.

She tried to explain to Inuyasha over and over in the beginning why his sacrifice was worth it, why it was good that he was forever living in the mirror. For one thing, he had become immortal himself. He never aged, and he never died. Her powers and that mirror sustained him over the centuries.

For another thing, he was what allowed her to keep the human race alive. But even after all those years, he was a stubborn bastard. Those golden yellow eyes that had once gazed upon her with love and adoration now turned to anger and hatred. Not once had he given in and relented to her. Not once did he pass by a chance to try and escape.

…Not that there were many chances of that. Her many sub-spells made it all but impossible.

She shivered with the anticipation of seeing him again, of kissing him free, of letting him out for the night. She had things for him to do, youkai for him to track down. There had been a small surge in youkai power around the outskirts of Nara, and she would need him to check it out and report back to her, see if it was something she should act on immediately or not.

She finished dressing herself, placing the perfect amount of jewelry around her wrists and neck and ears, checking her makeup, making sure everything was right. When Miroku reappeared back into the room, his split lip was healed, and Kikyou was ready to go.

"Come," she said, and Miroku followed her to the basin, stepping inside the white circle and staying close at her side. She pressed her fingers into the white sand, submerging them up to her wrists before pulling them halfway out. She began to circle her hands in intricate patters through the sand, sifting and pushing as her bedroom disappeared. She closed her eyes, concentrating.

Sifting herself through present space was not the same as sifting herself through time. While a representation of her body stayed behind in her bedroom when she visited her memories of the past or the many realities of the future, her body moved with her to the museum. She was physically there, just as she had been physically in her room.

Her eyes snapped open when she heard Miroku take in a sharp breath. Her dead, beating heart stopped.

The mirror was broken. Shattered. Destroyed.

But how could this have happened?

Kikyou whipped her head around to glare at the monk beside her, who's wide eyes matched her own.

"Miroku," she hissed, "what do you know?"

"Nothing, my lady." It was one of his few honest answers, she could see it him, feel it in him.

She seethed, her power pulsing beneath her skin. There were only two outcomes to the destruction of the mirror. Either it broke with Inuyasha still inside, which would mean that he was trapped forever, or…

Or he had  _escaped_.

Slowly, oh-so-carefully, Kikyou moved towards the mirror, reaching out with her powers, feeling for the brush of the mirror's spell against her.

Nothing. It was dead.

Her eyes shot down and narrowed at the ripped, golden frame.

He'd figured out how to escape this mirror, although from the looks of it, he'd only realized how to transfer the spell, not how to break it.

But even so, how?  _How?_  It was impossible for him to leave unless someone kissed him free, and he could not have possibly talked another girl into granting him a night's freedom so soon after the last. The doppelganger certainly hadn't come back, she'd seen to that! No one could retain their memories after Kikyou wove a memory spell. The girl would have been extremely physically ill and nervous if she even stepped one foot inside the museum, and the  _only_  way to break that was to get close enough to the mirror.

 _Impossible!_  Her mind screamed.  _Utterly impossible!_

And yet, the girl had been her doppelganger, almost a copy of her. The proof was in the jewel she had found inside of her. If anyone could push past a memory spell…

 _She could_. Her mind taunted.

Kikyou bent down and picked up a glass shard. Inuyasha was getting smart in his old age. How he had realized that making a portable mirror would buy him some time she couldn't guess. But really, it didn't matter in the end. He might have bought himself a day or two, or perhaps even three, but she would track him down, and she would find him, and when she did, she was never letting the bastard out again.

Closing her eyes, the glass shard gripped tightly in her hands, she let her power build up around her, letting the glass tell its story. She listened as it spilled the events of Inuyasha's escape.

"Miroku." Kikyou called, her voice deadly quiet with the urge to keep it together, to keep her control. He was by her side in a flash. "Inuyasha has escaped."

He didn't reply this time, which was smart of him. If she heard his voice right now she might lose it.

"Track him down." She commanded.

He nodded and began the turn, but Kikyou reached out and grabbed onto his robe before he could complete it. "Wait." She said.

She'd have to be smart about this. Tracking Inuyasha would get her nowhere. As long as her doppelganger was on the loose, she would keep coming back to get him. And now that she thought about it, now that she was calm enough, she realized that this whole ordeal was nothing but a simple nuisance. Kikyou could see the big picture. She understood the best action to take. She smiled at Miroku, her new plan firmly set in her head.

"Track the girl down instead. Get her when she's alone and then call me. I want to have a little chat with my other self."

In a rush of purple robes he was gone.

 


	15. Sifting

Inuyasha

"Hold it." Inuyasha growled. He narrowed his eyes at the doppelganger, letting her know full well that he could track what she was doing, even if he hadn't been looking at her. "If you fucking touch that idiotic contraption, I'll come for you next."

She froze, arm stretched out for the weapon. He watched as she slowly moved away from it, glaring at him.

Good.

He inhaled deeply, forcing the pulsing tide of his demonic aura down inside of him, willing himself away from transformation. Once fully transformed it was hard to stop, especially without his sword.

He kept his gaze pinned to the doppelganger as he felt the redness recede from his vision. The kid who'd tried to gouge his eyes out earlier was unconscious on the bed, although he was breathing, and the infuriating girl who had  _shot_  him was currently under the control of his grip, held tight against the wall. The only one he wasn't fully in control of was the infuriating Kikyou-double who called herself Kagome.

"Now," he said, "Everybody calm the fuck down, and listen to what I have to say. …If you want to live that is." And he let both girls know how serious he was by putting as much menace behind his grin as he could. He watched Kagome's face drain of color.

He had her full attention now, which was imperative at this point. Once he lost that, she might do something rash, like  _shoot him again_ , and he'd slip back out of control, and he really,  _seriously_  did not want to kill anyone. Once he morphed to full youkai, he would have no way of protecting them from himself. Kagome's actions in the next few seconds could alter everything.

He tried not to show it on his face, keeping his expression mean and intimidating.

"I am not here to eat you, as you all seem to think I am. I am not here to kill you,  _although_ ," he added quickly as Kagome opened her mouth to argue, "I am not beyond tearing apart the next person to fucking shoot me.  _Understood_?"

She nodded, eyes wide, darting from him to her friend and back to him again.

"I'm past you two playing hero. I'm done with this game. You. Doppelganger." He pointed a clawed finger at Kagome, growling his next words. "Pick up the weapon.  _Slowly_. If you shoot me with it, I will break your friend's neck." He watched as she sucked in a deep breath and moved slowly, just as he'd instructed, picking up the weapon with her thumb and index finger and bringing it to him.

"N-no!" Her friend bit out.

Inuyasha tightened his grip around her neck. "Shut up."

She coughed.

"Please don't hurt her, she was just trying to protect me." Kagome said, holding the weapon out for him. Inuyasha reached out and swiped the newfangled torture device from her, crushing it into a deformed metal ball in his hand. Then he let it drop to the floor.

He was expecting her to let out a shriek of fear or something, but she looked relieved instead. Which was strange, because as far as she had to be concerned, there was a crazy, bloodthirsty youkai in the room who had her friend shoved up against the wall.

"I won't hurt her, as long as you promise to fucking stay put for more than three seconds." He promised.

She locked her jaw and crossed her arms. "You won't hurt Kohaku either? Or me?" She added as an afterthought.

"You won't go running off?"

At her firm nod of agreement, Inuyasha turned back to her friend. Sango. "Listen up," he said, eyes locked onto hers, "if you try to so much as push me, it's not you I'll go after, it's your brother."

The absolute fear followed by absolute hate that flashed through her eyes convinced him she understood. Slowly, he released his grip around her neck, letting her fall to the floor in a crumpled heap, where she coughed violently.

"Sango!" Kagome started towards her, but Inuyasha held his hand up to stop her.

"Stay where you are."

"But she's hurt."

"She's fucking fine, she just needs to breathe a little."

"You slammed her head into the wall!"

Keh, that was such a human thing to do, blaming others for their own actions. What he had done was out of self-defense, that bitch had attacked him first. " _She fucking shot me._ " He seethed.

She opened her mouth to argue, then closed it again, eyes darting to her friend. Then she turned her eyes onto him and locked them there.

Inuyasha had to school himself not to react to her. His mind immediately skipped to the first time she'd kissed him. Then the second. Then the third. He grit his teeth against the memories, against mentally replaying the way her lips felt on him, the way she had shivered under him, how wet she'd been for him.

No.  _No_. He couldn't let himself get carried away anymore, no matter how much his body seemed to crave her. She was a racist bitch, and even though it didn't make any damn sense that she had flipped the switch, somehow, in between the time they'd last kissed and he had seen her again, she had become disgusted with herself for being so attracted to him.

He had been  _so_  angry with her. So fucking pissed off while she refused to look at him. It made him sick to his stomach. Had he thought this Kagome girl would be the one to fix all his fucked up relationship problems? No. It was going to take more that a stupid, pretty, human female and probably another three hundred years before he was even in the range of being ready for anything more than lust. But he  _had_  thought she was  _different_.

" _Inuyasha, you cannot claim me as you are. You cannot claim me until you are human_."

Kikyou's words replayed on a sickening loop over and over inside his head. Keh. Women, both human and youkai, were all the same. He wasn't good enough for any of them. He was damned being half human, and damned being half youkai. But both parts were what made up  _him_ , dammit, and that's why he had to shove it back, every shot to his ego, every hit to his pride. Shove it far back so he just wouldn't give a damn anymore.

Keeping his back to the window he'd climbed through to get in the house, his eyes pinned both girls, in case they were stupid enough to try anything else. He crossed his arms over his chest and sank into the desk chair, trying to get as comfortable as possible while maintaining track of everyone situated in the room.

"Now that we've all calmed down a bit, we can talk." He said.

Kagome's eyes hadn't left his, not for a second. And for the first time he saw something besides the lust and the fear that usually mixed there. Determination. He sensed that something had shifted in her. She leaned up against the wall, folding her arms in a mimic of him, her jaw set.

"So? Talk."

He smirked. "Here's what I need from you. I need the jewel. I'm pretty sure you're the only one that can track it down."

"What makes you think that?" She asked, frowning.

"Because you're Kikyou's doppelganger. The jewel was  _inside_  of you, which means you were born with it, which means it's a  _part_  of you. You should be able to sense the shards."

She huffed impatiently. "That's like saying if my finger were chopped off and hidden from me I'd be able to 'sense' it and track it down."

"That would be stupid, unless your finger is a powerful jewel." He made a show of looking at her hand. "It's not."

She ignored his taunting. "So all I have to do is… is  _feel_  around for these shard pieces?"

"That's all." He insisted.

"And then you'll leave me and my friends alone?"

Inuyasha nodded, holding his hands up to signify he had nothing to hide. "You'll have seen the last of me, I promise."

Her eyes narrowed, and he saw the skepticism there. "Where do I begin looking?"

He shrugged. "I've got a few leads, a few people to check out. If I know Kikyou, and I know her well, she didn't just scatter them randomly, she'll have sent them to people she either trusts or who owe her something."

Kagome tensed up then, pushing herself away from the wall. "Wait a second. How long is this going to take?"

He clamped his teeth together. He could feel himself growing increasingly impatient. She was asking too many damn questions. "Does it matter? Do you think I'm going to take no for an answer? This isn't going to be a fucking day-trip, doppelganger, you don't-"

"My  _name_  is Kagome, not doppelganger. Stop calling me that."

Inuyasha grinned. He liked that he was able to jab at her with his words. That it got to her. "That's what you are though, Ka-go-me, just a doppelganger, a fucking copy of an original. Who, when she discovers that you've helped me escape, by the way, will want you fucking dead. Do you get what I'm saying?" He had stood up at some point during his tirade, trying to intimidate her with his size.

Her chin jutted straight in the air, her eyes glairing daggers up at him. She was afraid, he could smell the faint odor coming from her, but he was damned if she refused to show it. Her arms stayed crossed and her feet stayed grounded in place. She wasn't giving him an inch.

For some reason Inuyasha was excited by the thought that she could, at least on the outside, hold her ground. Under normal circumstances, he would have been all for taking his time, figuring out what made her tick. But he didn't have any fucking time. He needed that jewel whole and powerful and in his hands. Now.

"Keh," he said, moving slowly back to the chair and sitting down, smiling at her visible relief, just like when he'd crushed the weapon earlier. "My point is, it doesn't matter how long it takes, you're still going to help me."

"Kagome… Don't." Sango rasped from her still-crumpled spot on the floor.

"By all means, listen to your friend. But I won't stop following you around until you agree. I will make your life a living hell."

Her eyes widened.

He had her now, he knew it, and he couldn't help the smirk that spread across his face.

But then, suddenly, she was smirking too, and it caught him off guard. Only for a second did his face slip, before again becoming perfectly controlled.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" She asked, body visibly relaxing in front of him. "From what I can tell, you have about…" she glanced down at her wrist watch, "six hours until sunrise. Until you're sucked back into your little prison. And I can assure you,  _Inuyasha_ , that I won't be letting you out again." Her smirk had turned into a grin.

Fuck. He had been counting on the fact that she wouldn't remember that little detail, that his fast talking would be enough to get her to agree to at least  _start_  looking for the jewel. She was smarter than he had given her credit for, and she knew it. She took two steps towards him, confident now.

He glared back at her with contempt.

He had to play his cards right.

"Six hours," he growled. "Six hours is a hell of a lot of time to cause havoc. Six hours is more than enough time to-" he stopped his threat mid sentence, shocked. He felt the sift in the space around them, felt the traces of power seconds before  _he_  appeared.

Inuyasha's eyes flashed to Kagome, and he could tell:  _she sensed it too_.

He appeared right behind her, Kikyou's lackey, purple robes swirling along with the sifting wind, deep eyes gazing out underneath dark bangs. Kagome went ridged, eyes wide. Scared. Before she could turn her head to look, his arm was around her neck in a chokehold.

Her hands immediately went up to claw at his arm, grabbing fistfuls of cloth. She could still breathe though, he could see it as she started to panic.

" _Miroku_ ," Inuyasha hissed.

"Inuyasha," Miroku replied, his voice the same, calm timbre. His eyes scanned the room, falling on the unconscious whelp on the bed and the girl on the floor now struggling to sit up. "I hope you're not planning on killing any humans," he continued. "Otherwise Kikyou will be upset."

"Kikyou can fucking shove it."

His eyebrow quirked up, but he didn't take the bait. "Excuse us."

" _No_!" Inuyasha shouted, launching himself from his seat, reaching his hand out. But it was too late, Miroku sifted again, and Inuyasha's claws closed around thin air, right where the doppelganger had been standing.

"Wh-what the  _hell_!" Sango shouted, finally standing on shaky legs. "Kagome! What the hell, where did they go?" Her eyes locked onto Inuyasha. "What did he do to Kagome?"

Inuyasha stood stock-still. It was too quick. Kikyou had found them too quick. But this couldn't be the end, not when he finally had a slim chance of freeing himself for good. No way was he going to give up now. No way was he handing over the doppelganger.

Not without a fucking fight.

Inuyasha turned and gave Sango a curt nod. "I'll bring her back," he said. He had only seconds to track and follow Miroku, and then it would be too late. He closed his eyes, concentrated, and caught the barest wisp of a trail.

He sifted.

 


	16. The Release

Kagome

Something inside of Kagome had snapped.

All the worrying, all the fear, all the wondering if she'd been spelled or not. She was sick of it.

Inuyasha, the infuriating hanyou, had gotten to her. But not in the way he thought. No. He'd gotten to her in a different way.

She was  _pissed_.

Once she realized he wasn't going to kill them, at least not yet, she understood that she actually had some  _leverage_  over him. That there was more she could do than just sit back and quiver in her boots. She could see it in his eyes – he  _needed_  her alive. And that need of his she could work with.

Sango had protected Kagome, like some sort of freaking  _superhero_ , and dammit, she was going to repay the favor. She didn't know any kick-ass karate moves, but she had the one thing the evil creature in front of her needed. And she was going to use that knowledge to keep Sango and Kohaku safe.

Inuyasha sat across from her in Sango's room, in her desk chair, like he owned the place. His arms were crossed over his chest and he had a full-blown smirk on his face.

She hated that smirk. She would take his bloated, over-confident smile and rip it right off him.

She felt her body relax, knowing she had to play the one card she had. Something from within screamed at her not to find the jewel shards for him, like a warning.  _Danger!_  It screamed.  _Danger!_  So she there was just one last-ditch idea she had, one last rock she was going to throw at him.

Screw him and his bullying, intimidating youkai crap.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" She asked. "From what I can tell, you have about…" she glanced down to check the time. It was twenty-after-twelve in the morning. "Six hours until sunrise. Until you're sucked back into your little prison. And I can assure you,  _Inuyasha_ ," she said, putting as much contempt behind his name as possible, "that I won't be letting you out again." She grinned at him, she couldn't help it. Once he was back in the mirror come morning time, she'd take the stupid cursed thing and bury it out in the middle of the woods, in the deepest hole she could dig. And she wouldn't feel bad about it, either. She wouldn't feel bad about him being trapped in the mirror, in the dark for all of eternity.

Or maybe she'd smash it first. Would he be forever stuck inside then? With no possible hope to be let out? Forever?

She tried not to shiver at the thought, especially since he might take it as reacting to the glare he was shooting her way.

"Six hours," he growled. "Six hours is a hell of a lot of time to cause havoc."

Crap. Crap, crap, he was right. Her idea had backfired. What if he went on a killing spree? No one would be able to stop him, not unless she agreed to help him.

 _No!_  The warning voice screamed inside her head.

He kept talking to her, kept his threat going. "Six hours is more than enough time to-" And then he stopped, frozen, eyes wide.

Confused for a second, Kagome wondered what face she'd made to get him to react like that, but then it hit her too. The air around her became prickly. The fine hair on her arms and the back of her neck stood on end, and she felt something vibrate in her chest, low and steady. Her mind reeled. What the-?

That same gentle gust of wind, the same sound of rustling fabric, it was like she'd been thrust back in the museum cave on that very first night. Those same hands that had ripped open her side swept around her again, one closing over her throat.

She felt her body go rigid at the pressure against her neck, and her hands shot up to claw at the skin of his forearm. It was covered in that same thick, purple fabric, she couldn't do anything but tug at the arm, trying to get free. She couldn't turn to get a good look at him, but she knew, she just  _knew_  it was the same man.

Her eyes swept to Inuyasha, who's face mirrored her same shock. Then his brows drew together and he gripped the back of the desk chair with one hand, claws ripping into the fabric. He hissed. " _Miroku._ "

She heard the deep, smooth voice of the man behind her. "Inuyasha," he said. "I hope you're not planning on killing any humans. Otherwise Kikyou will be upset."

"Kikyou can fucking shove it." He growled, his face contorted in anger.

There was a pause, and for a moment, she thought the man called Miroku and Inuyasha might start to fight. She readied herself to grab Kohaku and Sango and get the hell outta dodge if that happened.

But then the man spoke again. "Excuse us." He said.

Kagome watched Inuyasha's eyes go wide, watched him launch himself from his seat, his clawed hand reaching out towards her.

" _No_!" He shouted, before everything around her blurred, like motion lines in a photograph. Faster and faster the world moved around her. Kagome thought she might be sick. Her stomach flipped and the wind kicked up and howled around them, whipping her hair around her face.

Suddenly everything became solid, too solid too fast, and Kagome felt the unmistakable acidic rise of vomit forcing it's way up her esophagus. Wrenching herself out of the man's arms, she fell to her hands and knees and threw up. It kept coming until everything was out of her stomach, and she continued to dry-heave, the smell of her own discharge burning in her nose.

"Typical."

Kagome pulled herself together enough to peek up through her hair. The priestess stood in front of her, just as beautiful and cold as she remembered. Her nose upturned at the mess Kagome had made on the floor.

Kagome struggled to her feet, embarrassed. She attempted to smooth her tangled, wind-blown hair out of her face and look somewhat presentable, trying to ignore the vomit. "S-sorry." Was all she could manage to say.

Kikyou smiled, ignoring her and turning to the man. "Did you lose him, Miroku?"

Miroku shrugged. "Possibly. I sifted all over the place. If anything, it will take him a few minutes to reach us."

She nodded before acknowledging Kagome again. "Don't mind the mess, sifting doesn't settle well with humans."

Kagome shifted uncomfortably on her feet. Wasn't Kikyou a human? She certainly wasn't a youkai, although granted, Kagome only knew the one, so it wasn't like she was an expert on picking them out from the crowd. But Kikyou talked like humans were an entirely different species.

"Where… where am I?" Kagome asked, glancing around. It was a house, she was sure of it, but it was old, the wallpaper torn, the wooden floor rotting through. They were in the upper level of the house because the ceiling slanted up on both sides and came together in the shape of a roof. She wondered why she'd been brought here of all places, wondered what was in store for her. Inuyasha had implied many times that Kikyou would be furious, would right out kill her if she caught her. But so far, Kikyou simply looked calm and collected. She didn't seem furious. And she was making no move to kill Kagome. …Not yet anyway.

Kikyou waved her hand at Kagome's question. "An abandoned structure not far from where Miroku found you." She said, boredom ringing in her tone. Or was it simple disinterest? "I'm so sorry that I had to pull you away from your friend like that. But I had to speak with you alone."

The words were right, but the tone was off. Kagome got the sneaking suspicion that Kikyou was far from sorry. She clenched her jaw together, refusing to give in and lash out. She wouldn't let her fear get the best of her.

The priestess smiled again when she didn't reply and continued on. "Little doppelganger." She shook her head, as if the term were endearing, as if Kagome was a cute little pet. "When we last met I thought I made it pretty clear that I didn't want you coming back for Inuyasha."

"You didn't say that." Kagome mentally smacked herself for opening her mouth.

"The simple fact that I had your memories erased should have tipped you off." Her polite smile turned cold, and Kagome shivered. "I'm curious how you got close enough to break my spell, though. You should have been terrified. Tell me. How did you find the nerve to go back?"

Kagome shrugged. "I don't know. I just went back." No way would she admit that she'd been so scared she'd nearly wet herself.

Kikyou brought her hand up to her chin, a speculative look in her eyes. She started to pace, slowly, in a circular pattern around Kagome, giving her wide berth. Still, Kagome tensed up, just in case.

"You know," the priestess said, "you're the first one to go back for him. The very few others who tried to release him stayed far, far away. But then again, you  _are_  my reincarnation."

Kagome sucked in a sharp breath. "….I am?" She asked. It sounded strange, having her confirm what Inuyasha had guessed at.

"Most certainly. It's why the jewel was inside of you. You see, when I died, it burned with me, passed on with me." She frowned. "Although I had expected to keep it with me always, I hadn't counted on it passing along to my next life."

"Ah," Kagome spoke up, curiosity getting the better of her, "that doesn't make any sense, because you're still alive…?" She had meant it as a statement, but it came out sounding more like a question.

She grinned. "Yes, yes. Technically you could say that I am alive. I do breath, I do have a heart, and it does pump blood through me. I feel things. Anger. Pain. Desire." She locked eyes with Kagome on that last word, and she  _knew_  what she was implying.

"You were in love…" Kagome muttered, hating the way her voice sounded, "with Inuyasha?"

Kikyou sighed, loud and heavy, continuing her slow, walking pattern. "Yes, Inuyasha and I… cared about each other."

"So then why entrap him in a mirror?"

That creepy, cold smile was back on her lips. "Sometimes, caring about someone isn't enough. Especially when that someone works so hard to undo everything you've worked for." She paused, but Kagome stayed silent, waiting for her to continue. "Inuyasha was not willing to save himself. I did what I had to do. For humanity."

"For humanity." Kagome repeated, not understanding her one bit.

"For humanity," she nodded. She stopped walking, quirking her head to the side, as if Kagome were a child that didn't understand grownup talk. "Why do you think youkai aren't running around freely in your world today, doppelganger? Why do you think humans are masters of the earth? Why is it that although youkai are stronger and faster, the physically superior race, they're not ruling humans?"

"It makes sense, doesn't it?" She continued. "That youkai would be the more advanced race? That, if they were able to, they'd run wild and free? Humans are, for the most part, food to these creatures after all."

"Youkai eat people?"

"Some do. Most do. So why haven't they shown themselves? Why haven't they come forward?"

Kagome shrugged, keeping her mouth shut.

"Me. They haven't because of me."

 _Of course_ , Kagome thought dryly,  _typical crazy person with a typical ego_.

"Inuyasha is youkai, and because he is youkai he is where he needs to be: In the mirror. That's the only option for him other than death, But let's get back to the point. You are simply my copy, doppelganger. I let you free, gave you back your life. However, I can't have you running amok, breaking my spells and setting Inuyasha free. Why should I let you loose again, when you have proven to be such a nuisance to me?" She waited for Kagome to reply.

Swallowing her fear, at least as much as possible, Kagome crossed her arms over her chest. "Look, it's not like I was purposely going back to free Inuyasha, I had a school assignment to complete. I never would have forced myself back in there if I didn't need to get my report done."

"You still went in, and you still released him. And that, I'm afraid, my dear copy, is why I cannot allow you to leave this time."

Dread washed over Kagome. Kikyou's face had contorted into something evil. She barely looked human.

"Grab her," the priestess said, and those same hands wrapped around Kagome's arms again. This was just the same as before, and the panic really started to eat at her. Kikyou stepped closer as Kagome struggled.

"Wha-wha-what are you going to do, lock me in a mirror too?" She asked out of desperation, frantic to try and keep her talking.

She let out a sharp bark of laughter. "No. Inuyasha is in the mirror for a reason. His hanyou aura sustains the spell, which in turn sustains me. You would just be a little girl, stuck in a piece of glass." She continued to walk forward, reaching her arms out as her minion kept Kagome in place. "Don't make me spell you still, dear. Stay where you are."

"S-stop, don't come near me!" The dread in her gut bubbled over, and she kicked out behind her, catching shin with her heel. The man grunted, but his grip held firm.

"I'm sorry it has to be this way, truly I am," Kikyou continued as she drew near. "Believe me when I tell you that I am trying to help your species. Your death will be for the greater good. At least leave with that comforting thought."

Comforting thought? That thought wasn't freaking  _comforting_! She shrunk back as best she could, away from the priestess. Inuyasha had been right, she was a crazy, evil bitch! Kagome was terrified, way more terrified than when she had opened Sango's door and Inuyasha had stood there, glowering down at her, way more terrified than when Inuyasha had shoved Sango up against the wall by her throat. At this point, she'd rather be facing death by the hanyou's claws then by this creepy, cold, somehow-dead-but-still-breathing witch-priestess!

She felt like she might vomit again. But there was something else happening inside her. It started in her chest at is spread. Heat. Uncontrollable, uncomfortable heat boiled at the core of her body, like compressed rage and a severe sunburn all rolled into one. Kikyou stepped near, arms outstretched, a crazy, murderous gleam in her eye, and Kagome felt that heat shoot out from her chest and down her arms, just as she brought her hands up to protect her face.

It was blinding, the light that shot out of her hands. She heard screaming and smelled cooking, sizzling meat. The hands gripping her arms were gone, and she felt engulfed in warmth. It reminded her of when she was little and had wet the bed, and her mother had drawn a bath at two in the morning and put her in, still half asleep and drowsy. It was that same protected, glowing feeling, and it radiated from deep inside.

 _What_  was happening to her? She felt as if there were something new within her, space within her chest that hadn't been there before. She felt expanded, bigger than her body.

The screams continued.

Searing heat on her palms now. The pain brought Kagome back to herself. Her hands were wrapped around Kikyou's arms, and they were  _burning_ her. Kagome's wrists all the way to the tips of her fingers glowed white-hot. Horrified, she tried to pull away, but she was stuck, welded to her as Kikyou's flesh sizzled and bubbled around her hands.

Kagome screamed, and the light expanded again. There was a loud popping sound, and she was ripped free of Kikyou's arms. The priestess was flung back. Her body slammed against the far wall and then fell in a heap to the ground.

Tears poured from Kagome's eyes, scared out of her mind.  _What's happening_? She screamed inside her head,  _what have I done? What am I_?

The light faded away into a, dull, faded pink glow, centered in her chest. She lifted her shaking hands, expecting to see severe charring, or third-degree burns, but they were smooth and perfect. Whipping around in a circle, she caught movement to her right. The man who had taken her from Sango's house, who had ripped her side open days before, slowly rolled onto his stomach. He groaned loudly, hands coming up to hold his head.

"What the  _fuck_?"

Kagome whipped around again, eyes going wide as Inuyasha appeared out of thin air, and the relief hit her like a ton of bricks.

"What the hell  _happened_?" Inuyasha exclaimed, eyes darting around the worn down room.

"I-I don't know." Kagome cried. She tried to calm her rapid breathing, but her breath kept hitching. "She-she came after me, she was trying… trying to kill me. I brought my h-hands up and then… then…"

He was at her side then, gripping her upper arm. Kagome winced at the sudden movement.

"Then what?" He gave her a little shake when she didn't answer right away. " _Then what_?"

"Th-then I don't know! There was this light! This light coming from my hands and… and…"

"You  _purified_  them?"

"I-  _what_?" She felt sluggish suddenly, like her brain had slowed down. The urge to vomit had passed, despite the smell of burnt flesh filling the room, but now she was dizzy, and weak, like all the energy her body produced during the day had run out. She felt her legs give out beneath her.

"Hey, what the-!" Inuyasha reached out and caught her, she could feel the muscles bunching in his arms as he dragged her to him. She let herself collapse against him. No way could she stand on her own right now.

The man called Miroku was getting up, Kagome could see him out of the corner of her eye. She felt Inuyasha's chest rumble as he released a growl.

"Inuyasha," Miroku said, standing at full height now, hand still rubbing at his head.

"Fucking monk," Inuyasha spat. "Still letting the bitch control you I see."

Miroku frowned, glancing over at the unconscious woman lying still on the floor. "It's not like I have much of a choice in the matter," he said dully, hand finally moving away from his temple. "I do what I'm told. Just like you've been doing until now."

"Not anymore."

"Apparently not."

"And you're fucking thick if you think I'll be letting you just take the doppelganger from me again. She's mine."

Kagome blinked, not sure if she heard him correctly or not. She raised her head to see him face through her hazy vision. His jaw was set and his eyes were locked on the monk.

"Kikyou wants her dead."

"That's fucking obvious," he growled. "Just stay back while I finish the witch off, and we'll be out of your way." Then he turned, dragging Kagome with him, pinning her to his side as took two steps towards the fallen priestess.

Miroku leapt in front of them, blocking their way. Inuyasha reared back sharply.

"Get out of the way, monk."

"I can't do that."

"Keh. You make me fucking sick." He took another step forward.

Kagome gazed at the man though her weakened eyes, barely making out his movements. He swiftly removed the prayer beads from around his hand, then opened his fingers just a little.

The wind kicked up around them, but it was different from the wind she had felt while sifting with Miroku. This wind was brutal. She could feel herself being pulled forward, ever so slightly along with Inuyasha.

"Fuck!" He cursed, pulling Kagome tighter to him. "Don't think this is the last of it, monk!" He shouted over the wind. Then he cursed again.

"Let the doppelganger know there's a little present waiting for her at home!" Miroku shouted back, but before Kagome could open her mouth to ask what he meant, the edges of her vision blurred, and she was being pulled back, away from Miroku and the insane priestess. Away from the abandoned, rotting house.

They hit solid ground.

Kagome fell to her knees.

She threw up.

Which was weird, because she thought she'd gotten everything out of her stomach the first time. Apparently not.

"Shit, are you kidding me?" Inuyasha cried, reaching down to pull her to her feet once she'd emptied her stomach again. Kagome whimpered, exhausted.

"Ugh," was all she could manage.

"Keh. I forgot that you humans don't handle instantaneous transportation well." He smirked in reply to her glare. "Don't vomit on my feet," he added.

Shivering, feeling that she had reached her limit, Kagome weakly shoved him off of her. "Just, get away from me," she said, willing her legs to stop wobbling around. They were in the middle of the street right in front of Sango's house. The porch light was on, but it was quiet inside. Kagome struggled to take each step. If she could only get in side, get to the couch, and pass out. She was so tired.

"Whoa, now." Inuyasha said, catching her for the second time that night. She hadn't even realized her legs had given out again. She looked up at him.

He had come for her. She remembered the panicked look on his face when Miroku had taken her.  _She's mine_ , he'd said, after he'd followed the trail. She wasn't silly enough to think that he'd meant anything other than he needed her to track down the jewel. But the small twinge of her heart hadn't been imagined. She pushed those feelings deep, deep down and tried to lock them away.

"Get off of me," she reinforced, struggling to get free of his grasp.

"Hey," he said. He released her, arms folding over his chest. "I just saved your ass. The least you could do is show some fucking gratitude, no matter how much my youkai side disgusts you."

"Ugh!" She said again, but this time out of anger instead of nausea. "You are so thick! I'm not disgusted by your youkai side. I don't know where you got the idea of me being any sort of racist, but I'm not, so stop accusing me of it."

"Keh. Whatever, wench, you were so disgusted you wouldn't even look at me."

"Look," she snapped. She was starting to get a headache. "You're right, I wouldn't look at you, but it wasn't because I was disgusted."

"…Whatever." He repeated as he slowly followed her up the front steps. "You don't have to like me, but maybe a 'thanks' for getting you back is in order."

Kagome rolled her eyes. "You just saved me because I can get your stupid jewel for you. Don't think this means I owe you."

"Hell yes you owe me!" He exclaimed. "You'd be dead back there otherwise. Miroku would have swallowed you whole with his wind-tunnel."

What the hell was a wind-tunnel? No wait, she didn't want to know, she just wanted to sleep. Sleep, sleep, sleep. So she ignored his taunting, reaching the front door, and knocking. Once, twice, three times.

She couldn't help herself as she turned to Inuyasha and held up her hands.  _You_   _purified them!_  He had said.

"Something tells me I would have been fine."


	17. Family Secrets

 

Sango

Sango was a realist by nature.

It was expected growing up in a martial artist's family. She hadn't spent her childhood with her mother reading fairytales at bedtime, unless they were of the  _Grimm_  kind and always followed up with some lesson on real-world monsters. She hadn't passed her elementary days watching Disney princess movies with her friends, or learning ghost stories to tell at slumber parties in middle school. She hadn't spent her three-and-a-half years of high school trying to snag a boyfriend. Instead, assault statistics had been drilled into her tiny little head. Her nightmares as a child hadn't been of monsters under the bed, they'd been of scary men in masks dragging her away from mommy and daddy. And every time a boy dared try and grope her, she knew a hundred different ways to break any one of the twenty-seven bones in the offending hand.

People were unpredictable, you couldn't judge a person by their face alone. And it was that danger, that very  _real_  danger, that was pounded into her during self-defense classes six days a week. She taught children's classes on the weekends, where she'd pound the same mantra into them.

It wasn't just hand-to-hand combat her parents made her train in either. Shooting lessons, bootcamps and wildness survival, her parents insisted she and her brother have it all down. Sango supposed to someone looking in from the outside it might seem excessive, but it was just what everyone in her family did. She lived and breathed the lifestyle, just like her parents, just like her brother. She hadn't been given much of a choice. She didn't know any different.

Realism was rapists and murderers and pedophiles and kidnappers. Realism was not ghosts and zombies and vampires and youkai.

Which is why, when Kagome had dragged her into the museum that night, and that  _man_  had stepped out to show himself from  _inside_  the mirror, Sango thought she'd fucking lost it.

She was dreaming.

It was a trick.

She'd been attacked on their way to the museum and somehow overpowered and knocked unconscious, and now she was hallucinating.

The many different reasons her mind conjured up for a man to be  _inside_  a mirror flooded through her head. She flipped through them in seconds, like a mental roll-a-dex. But even though Sango knew for a fact that magical men did  _not_  come out of magical mirrors, she  _knew_  that she wasn't dreaming. She  _knew_  that it wasn't a trick. And she couldn't for the life of her figure out  _why_  or  _how_  she knew.

She just knew.

The knowledge was a pulsing pain in the back of her skull as she watched Kagome, her best friend in the whole world, lean in and kiss the mirror. Watched as the man, no, the  _youkai_ , as he claimed himself to be, kissed the other side and stepped out.  _From solid glass_.

Sango swallowed her panic. She buried her terror. Panic and terror were her enemy. She'd learned to roll with the punches, to stay calm and collected. Because when you panicked you became a victim, and when you became a victim, sometimes you became dead.

So she'd forced herself to relax, after her initial disbelief. Her immediate plan was to play it cool around this…  _creature_. To make sure she didn't tip him off that she didn't like him. That he gave her the creeps. She didn't believe in auras, but there didn't seem to be another word that explained the way her hair stood on end and her body seemed to vibrate when she was near him.

Taking him to her house that first night had been hell on her. Everything inside of her screamed to keep him away, to not let him inside. But damn if she hadn't let her pride get the better of her judgment. She could hold her own in a fight after all, she had enough gold medals in sparring and grappling to prove it. So if he tried anything, she could keep him under control, she was  _sure_  of it.

When Kagome had come to her for help, she'd laid out a plan. She'd been relieved that Kagome was having doubts also. Which is why she didn't step out of the whole fucked up situation. It was why she'd promised to help her friend get out of it.

Thinking back, running to Sango's house when she'd known he was following them was not the smartest move. Maybe they  _should_  have gone to the police. But really, what were they supposed to say?  _Help us officer! There's a youkai that came out of a mirror that can freaking_ spell _people into doing what he wants and now he's after us!_  Yeah, that would have gone swimmingly.

Besides, Sango knew her house well. She knew her brother was just as good as she was at protecting himself. She had every belief, just like she had that first night, that she could stay in control the situation.

And she knew where her father kept his gun.

So many mistakes she'd made up until this point. So many wrong choices. She knew it when the bullet only made him flinch. Bastard hardly blinked.

She should have shot him in the head.

She knew she was going to die when he had her up against the wall, air strangled from her lungs, sharp claws piercing the soft flesh of her neck. She couldn't break his wrist, she couldn't kick him. He was made of titanium, not bone. Such strength she had never come across before.

She was going to die.

But then she didn't. Kagome was there, pleading for Sango's life. Making deals and promises with the asshole. And he let Sango go. He let her go and she crumpled to the floor and sweet, painful relief flooded back into her lungs. Her throat was on fire. The sound of her veins pumping blood back into her head was a thumping, a throbbing. Her vision came back into focus, but she couldn't do much more than breathe.

"Kagome… Don't." She pleaded when she caught the youkai's demand of her friend. The words were like sandpaper in her esophagus. Like razors. But Kagome held her ground, bartering with the youkai, even going so far as to threaten him. A small spark of pride had flickered in Sango's chest at her best friend's bravery. She knew the girl had it in her.

But then it all went to hell, as if it hadn't been there already.

The barest whisper of wind. The sudden materialization of a man. Sango's jaw dropped for the second time that night. He towered over Kagome, deep purple robes wrapped securely around his body, a long, golden staff gripped in one wrapped, beaded hand. His deep black hair was pulled back into a short ponytail at the base of his neck, save for the thick bangs covering his forehead. His eyes were an unnatural, brilliant violet. Sango's mind reeled that she had just witnessed more impossibility. This was not real. This was  _not real_.

But that same tingle at the back of her neck insisted that it was.

He was fucking gorgeous, and, she realized a second later, probably another damn youkai, although he didn't look the same. Still, there was something off about him, despite his immense beauty, and Sango forced herself to stay as grounded as possible. If he was youkai, and for some reason could spell her, she did not want to get caught up the way Kagome had been caught up. No way would she lose herself in anything as evil as youkai.

She was dumbfounded, speechless. She watched as the two unrealistic males glowered at each other, noting the one Inuyasha called 'Miroku' had a distinct lack of fangs, and no weird animal appendages that she could see. Still, Inuyasha was the only youkai she'd ever come across, and as far as she knew, they varied in looks as much as the people from the melting pot that was America.

Finally shaking herself from her thoughts on the sudden appearance of this Miroku, she caught the tail end of his deep, distinctly male voice.

"-planning on killing any humans. Otherwise, Kikyou will be upset."

 _The witch who spelled Inuyasha_ , Sango's sharp mind popped up the information from her mental flashcards, but she only had a second to wonder about it before Inuyasha growled dangerously.

"Kikyou can fucking shove it." His teeth ground together.

Miroku's lips quirked up in a smile, and his eyes glanced quickly – too quickly – in her direction, before his eyebrow shot up in response. "Excuse us," was all he said, and then Inuyasha was flying towards him, eyes wide, a raging shout ripping from his throat.

"No!" He cried, and Sango inhaled sharply as Miroku disappeared, taking Kagome with him.

It was enough to get Sango back on her feet, no matter how rubbery and unbalanced her legs felt. She used the wall for support to push herself up. "Wh-what the  _hell_!" She cried. "Kagome! What the hell, where did they go?" She glared at Inuyasha, pouring all her hate into her heated gaze. "What did he do to Kagome?"

He turned to her and nodded once. Sharp. "I'll bring her back." He said.

Then he disappeared too.

Somehow, his promise hadn't left her satisfied.

The panic threatened to overtake her. Kagome was gone – had dematerialized right in front of her – and was now God-knew-where with two very dangerous men – no – youkai. What the hell could Sango do? How could she fix this?

Her eyes darted to her younger brother, still unmoving on her bed. Feeling sickened that she had somehow, in all this mess, forgotten about him, she moved towards him, swallowing the sob that tried to force its way up her throat.

His body was diagonal to the shape of the bed, his left leg dangling off the side, his head in the corner below the pillow. His arms were flung out beside him, but he was breathing which meant he was alive. Relief rushing through her, she collapsed next to him and focused on slowing her quickening breath, forcing down the tears that pricked at the corners of her eyes. She blinked rapidly, willing herself to slip into the familiar routine of light meditation. She could not panic, she could not break down. To be calm meant that she was in control of herself, and if she was in control of herself she could do something to fix the situation she was now in.

Closing her eyes she breathed in deeply, then out. In, then out. It took three or four times before her breathing stopped being shaky. Then slowly she started her mantra.

"Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become your character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny."

She breathed deeply. Then repeated. "Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become your character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny."

The third time started the calming affect. By the fifth repeat she felt the words sink in, felt her body cease it's shaking, felt her mind clear.

There had do be something she could do. Some weapon that was at her disposal. Some way to kill the youkai she hadn't thought of. Automatically she glanced over at her hiraikotsu, the small martial-arts weapon carved from animal bone and only double the size of her hand. She wished with all her might that it was powerful in some way, because she concentrated her weapons studies on the hiraikotsu the most. But other than flinging it around like a boomerang to do tricks for tournaments or hitting someone on the head and leaving a nasty bump, it wasn't much use for anything. She needed something else. Something more powerful than a gun.

It came to her then, as she repeated the mantra one more time, and she kicked herself mentally for not thinking of it before. Her father had pulled her and her brother aside after one morning of intense training. Both he and their mother had just gotten back the previous night from another martial arts weekend-long seminar, and for some reason she couldn't understand, they'd been angry. Sango and her brother had felt their father's anger in their training that day. He was pushing them harder, screaming at them louder. He even got into Kohaku's face about some elementary mistake he had made, despite the mistake being due to exhaustion.

At the end of the training, more cuts and scrapes adorning their skin than usual, he finally brought them aside, his anger gone and his eyes deadly serious.

"I want you two to remember something. Even if you forget every singe thing your mother and I have ever taught you – which you'd better not – you must remember this one thing. If there is an emergency, you need to go down into the basement and set the washing machine past full power. Do you understand?"

They didn't understand. Sango and Kohaku both did their own laundry, and there  _was_  no setting that went past full power. When Kohaku brought this up, their father merely chuckled.

"You're right, there isn't."

Still confused, and slightly worried at how somber her father was, Sango sighed. "What kind of emergency do you mean, dad? Like if a robber breaks into the house?"

His smile was tired and he shook his head. "No. If a robber breaks into the house, you grab my gun. If someone tries to kidnap you, you break his back. No, the emergency I'm talking about is different."

She waited for him to elaborate. He didn't. "So then what kind of emergency?" She finally asked.

"I can't tell you." He raised a hand up to cut off his children's protest. "Do not argue with me. I can't tell you. All I can say is that when this particular emergency happens, you'll know. And  _if_  it happens, and that's a big  _if_ , what are you going to do?"

"Go down into the basement and set the washing machine past full power," Sango and Kohaku chanted at the same time.

Satisfied, her father nodded. "Good. Now go clean up and get ready for dinner. We'll go out for ice cream later. You two worked hard today."

Cheering, Sango followed Kohaku towards the house, sparing a glance back at her father. She was shocked to see his face fall so devastatingly. A second later his features were schooled, leaving the then twelve-year-old Sango wondering if she'd imagined it.

Over the years, she'd almost forgotten. There had been no emergencies, other then the basement flooding one year during rainy season, and Kohaku nearly burning the house down after falling asleep with the stove on. But other than that, things had been peaceful. She and her brother attended school and trained, her parents worked and continued to frequent weekend or week-long martial arts seminars, and Sango had let the intense warning her father had given her fall to the wayside. It had been five years ago. She idly wondered if Kohaku remembered at all, he'd only been seven at the time.

Now she quickly stood up and rushed out into the hallway. If this wasn't an emergency, she didn't know what was. Youkai were real. Youkai were freaking  _real_  and they'd invaded her home and knocked her brother unconscious and kidnapped her friend. Was this what her father had been talking about? Was this the emergency he hadn't been able to explain?

It made sense. Had her father told her back then that youkai existed and they might one day find themselves fighting for their lives she would have laughed and thought him crazy.

Sango stumbled down the stairs, her head pounding with the previous lack of oxygen. She fled through the kitchen and into the family room, yanking open the basement door and flipping the light switch. Quickly she moved down the wooden steps and smacked into the washing machine, reaching out with a shaking hand and gripping the large knob to the right. The clicking noise as the knob flipped over each setting was loud in her ears, louder than her heavy breathing. For some reason she was terrified as the knob moved to full power. Breathing in deep she pressed it past the last setting.

For one impossibly long moment, nothing happened.

Then the ground shuddered beneath her feet, and a rectangular trapdoor in the floor opened to her left, in the center of the basement. Unnatural blue light glowed from inside. Eyes wide, breathing shallow, Sango made her way towards the opening. The walls and stairs that lead down into a room she'd never known existed before was made of steel and imbedded with those blue lights, illuminating the way. Slowly, slowly she made her way down the steps.

The room was large and like something she'd seen out of a futuristic Bond movie. But it was only a glowing, blue, steel room. Nothing lined the walls or the floor, nothing stood in the center. Looking down, there were two shoe imprints about a foot from where she stood. She stepped onto them, unsure of what else to do.

A flicker in the center of the room drew her gaze and a hologram, a freaking  _hologram_ , flared up from the center of the room.

Her father stood there. She could see through the blue lines that made him up, through the shading that made him 3-D. He was younger in this image by years, but that same stern face was his, the same heartfelt smile was the one she'd known for all these years.

"Emergency message activated. Sango. Kohaku." He spoke, his voice confirming that this was a recording of him when he was younger. "If you're down here, and you've activated this message, it means only one thing. Youkai."

Sango felt like she'd been punched in the gut. Her parents  _knew_  about youkai. And even though she'd known that everything that was happening to her was real, it was still somewhat devastating having it confirmed.

"First off, don't panic. Remember that when you panic, you're not in control," the hologram continued. "Youkai are dangerous, and they have been around for as long as humans have. They are stronger and faster, and usually have some sort of animal characteristic.  _However_ , lots of youkai look more human than animal, and you must be especially careful of those kind.

"You two are born into a legacy. While it's true that we are from a long line of martial artists, there is more to it that that. We come from a long line of youkai exterminators. Sango, Kohaku, you two have been training since you were born to fight off these monsters. If an emergency has happened, and you have activated this message because you have encountered dangerous youkai, everything you need to fight off and kill these monsters you will find here."

Sango jumped as a loud noise resonated through the room, and panels covering every inch of the wall opened and flipped over, revealing rows and rows of frightening, strange-looking weaponry and armor. Her mouth dropped open.

"These weapons are for you to use as needed. Simply touch an item in this room, and this message will explain what it is and what it does."

Slowly, somewhat unsure of herself, Sango moved from the footprints on the floor and reached out to the first item. It was silvery gold with tiny openings speckled across the surface, and it seemed to mold over the bottom half of a person's face. Two small, padded hooks adorned each end, meant to hook over the ears. Her fingertips grazed over the smooth material.

"Mask." The hologram recited. "It protects the wearer from poisons and miasma dealt by youkai, but is also useful against human poisons as well. It works as a high-grade filter device. It is always preferred that you wear one when going up against youkai."

Sango picked it up and pushed it lightly against her chin, breathing in. The air flowed easily through the holes, allowing her to breath normally. Placing it back down, she moved to the next item, a coil of large, heavy looking chain.

"Hunter Chain. The chain is light, easily portable, yet devastatingly heavy against youkai. Used to restrict movement and hold youkai in place. It will not have the same effect on humans."

"…What about half youkai?" Sango asked, remembering the stern correction about Inuyasha being  _hanyou_  instead of full  _youkai_. Her father didn't answer her though, he was just a recording. She picked up a coil of the chain. It was feather light.

The next few items were a dozen or so oblong bottles filled with liquid that glowed oranges and reds and purples and blues. She reached out to pick one up, the liquid partially turning to gas as she swirled it around, before turning back into liquid.

"Numbing Poisons. Used in replace of killing methods for the sake of interrogation. The poisons numb youkai, and can be masked by baking it into food or soaking an item in it. Each one affects a youkai in different ways. Some numb only the skin, some numb sight and taste and smell. These poisons work on humans as well, so extreme caution is needed at all times when using."

Placing the bottle back, Sango moved on to the next item, her gaze lingering on the poisons for only a few moments more before it landed on the sword. It was shorter than the katana she used in her tournament training, the edge sharper than any she'd seen before.

"Wakizashi," the message continued. "A short one-handed sword, used for close-range fighting, can slice through bone."

The next weapon was a smaller sword barely six inches long and no more than an inch thin at its base. It met at the point no wider than a needle.

"Dagger Gauntlet. Can be hidden and retracted within the sleeve, usually used as a last resort."

Sango shuttered at the idea of there being a last resort at all and moved towards the next weapon. They were giant kamas, more like sickles in their size, attached to chains instead of rope. Kohaku specialized in kamas, he would be delighted in seeing these. She reached out to touch the attached chains, wondering if they were as light at the hunter chains.

"Kusarigama. Large kamas. Made of demon bone. Can be thrown long distances, as well as quickly retracted."

There was a darkened gap between the kusarigama and the hanging armor, but as Sango passed by, the gap lit up.

Her hiraikotsu hung there, bathed in blue light, but it was large. It was bigger than large, it was  _huge_.  _Gigantic_. It towered over her and, entranced by its size and beauty, Sango reached out to touch it. She sensed it pulse beneath her fingertips, and suddenly felt like all the air had been sucked from her lungs. This hiraikotsu called to her soul.

"Hiraikotsu. Massive boomerang bone. Hiraikotsu is crafted from the bones of youkai that have been slain by us hunters. This hiraikotsu has been passed on through our family from generation to generation. It harbors the slain youkai spirits, and becomes more powerful as more spirits fill it. It has the ability to destroy demonic energy."

Ripping her hand away, weary of the intense pull she felt towards it, she slowly moved towards the last item on the wall. It was two full suits of body armor, one smaller to fit Kohaku's frame. She ran her fingertips across the black material.

"Hunter Armor. Armor used with bones of slain youkai. Always wear your armor when fighting youkai."

Sango had so many questions. She damned her parents for being gone at the seminar. She felt cheated, like they hadn't trusted her with telling her all this information themselves. She shook her head. Now wasn't the time to start blaming anybody. She now had what she needed to finally kill Inuyasha and that Miroku guy, whoever the hell he was.

She froze as an alarm went off. The hologram of her father blurred, then turned red.

"Youkai alert. Front door, five hundred feet. Youkai alert. Front door, five hundred feet. Youkai alert. Front door, three hundred feet."

Quickly, Sango grabbed up the dagger gauntlet, slipping it inside her sleeves, and the numbing poisons and headed towards the stairs. Whichever youkai it turned out to be, they'd have a surprise waiting for them. She was halfway up the stairs when she remembered the mask, and she jumped over the bottom two steps, ripping it from it's display case and hauling ass back up the stairs.

The trapdoor closed behind her, and she willed her beating heart to slow as someone knocked on the front door.

Hiding the poisons in her jacket pockets, and slipping the mask behind her back, she crept slowly to the door, listening carefully. There was another round of knocks before Sango heard two heated voices bickering on her front steps. One sounded distinctively like Kagome.

Evening out her breaths, Sango reached for the doorknob and yanked the door open.

"Sango!" Kagome cried, throwing herself into her friends' arms. Sango brought her free hand around to hug Kagome back, relief washing over her that her friend was alive and well.

"You okay?" She asked, blinking back more tears.

Kagome nodded. "I'm okay now."

"Keh. Thanks to me." The youkai said, and Sango's eyes locked onto his golden ones.

He was in for a big fucking surprise.

 


	18. Kagome's Scent

 

Kagome

"Something tells me I would have been fine," Kagome said, holding her hands up in front of her. She wasn't sure  _how_  she'd managed to protect herself, and the memory of melted, sizzling skin disturbed her greatly, but Inuyasha's stupid, egotistical  _smug_  face just pushed her over the edge. She couldn't help taunting him with it a bit. Because apparently, when crazy, possibly undead witches were out to murder her, her hands could turn into branding irons and melt skin off.

Lovely.

"Keh," he muttered as she knocked at the door again, "you managed to take Kikyou down for a bit I'll give you that." He grinned, leaning towards her.

She suddenly felt that same need pool below. She'd been so distracted what with all the threatening and attempted murdering going on around her, she hadn't had breath enough to…  _admire_  him with the same intensity that had hit her so hard when she first kissed him through the mirror.

No, no,  _no_! She couldn't let herself go back to that again! She was doing so well! She took a step back, ripping her eyes away from his and knocked again. Where the hell was Sango?

As if they shared the same mind, Sango swung the door open then, a bit pale but otherwise whole.

"Sango!" Kagome cried, and she launched herself into her friends' arms, so thankful to see her again. She wrapped her arms around Sango's neck, trembling against her. She hadn't realized until just that moment she thought she'd never see her friend again.

"You okay?" Sango asked. And she brought her arms around Kagome's waist.

Did she hear Sango's voice break a little? Kagome's heart fluttered at the thought of her best friend caring for her so much. She squeezed tighter, the hug some kind of proof that they'd both lived through everything that had happened tonight. "I'm okay now," she said.

"Keh. Thanks to me." Inuyasha added, that same smug look spread across his features.

Kagome tried not to roll her eyes. He was never going to let her forget it. And the worst part was he was right. For all his complaining and insults, he  _had_  come after her, and he  _had_  protected her from whatever that wind-tunnel thing was.

She owed him. The thought echoed within her suddenly-dizzying head as she and Sango pulled apart. She followed her friend into the kitchen and opened the cupboard, grabbing a glass and filling it with cool tap water. Her throat was suddenly dry.

She owed him. She couldn't refuse to help him anymore. Because it wasn't like she could pay him back by saving his life in return. Who the hell could kidnap six feet of hard, lean, youkai muscle? Who the hell could harm something so powerful? Her eyes darted to him again as he leaned his hip up against the kitchen island, his arms crossed over his still-bare chest, that stupid, infuriating smirk playing on his full lips.

 _Stop!_  Kagome screamed in her head. She had to knock it off and keep her thoughts clean and focused on the task at hand. Because even if the chance for her to save Inuyasha from kidnappers presented itself, it wasn't like she could do much to help him out. She didn't have any powers, save for her weird, smiting, temperature hands, and she wasn't even sure she could do that again.

So now she was stuck. And the jerk knew it too. He was going to make her help him find his stupid jewel, and – oh God – she was going to do it.

Sango brushed by her, filling two glasses up with water and placing them both onto the island counter, sliding one towards Inuyasha and bringing the second one up to her own lips. Inuyasha's ears swiveled on his head, twitching as he frowned at the cup.

"What's this?" He asked suspiciously.

Sango rolled her eyes. "It's water. You look thirsty."

He picked the glass up and sniffed the rim.

"So what happened? Where did that man take you?" Sango asked, eyes on Inuyasha as he took a sip; then, shrugging, a big gulp.

Kagome shuddered as she swallowed another mouthful of the deliciously cool liquid. "It was some abandoned house around here. Kikyou was there."

Sango's grip tightened on her cup. "What did she say to you?"

Snorting at the ridiculousness of it all, Kagome put her empty glass down and pushed herself up onto the countertop, her legs swinging in mid-air. "She said a lot of stuff, but mostly it was youkai are bad and need to be wiped out to preserve humanity." She could feel the flush spreading across her face, knowing without having to be told how wrong Kikyou's views were. Genocide was not the answer to save the human race! …She didn't know what  _was_ , but genocide  _wasn't_. For the first time since all this had started, she wondered if Inuyasha was under the impression that all humans felt that way. She chanced another sneaky look up at Inuyasha. He was frowning at her, and when their eyes met, he shrugged.

"Sounds about right." He agreed.

Sango folded her arms, drink forgotten. "If she's against youkai so much, why is she keeping you alive?"

"I'm useful to her, obviously." He snapped, then wiped at his forehead.

"I'm just glad to be out of there," Kagome continued, meaning every word. "And I'm glad you're okay too, Sango, I was worried that I-"

Inuyasha made a sound then, a high-pitched whine from the back of his throat. His hand shot up to press again his chest. "Wha- …What the fuck?" He choked out before his eyes widened and he started tipping back.

Kagome opened her mouth to call out to him, but she was distracted by Sango, who jumped onto the island countertop and leaped at him. Her hand moved quickly, and Kagome barely caught the flash of a container of some sort before a purple mist spread across his face.

"Dammit!" He cursed as Sango slammed into him, knocking him to the ground.

"Sango!" Kagome cried, slipping off the counter and dashing around the island as fast as she could. Sango had landed on top of Inuyasha, straddling his chest, one hand clutched at his throat and the other raised and posed to strike. "What the  _hell_  are you doing?!"

"Back off, Kagome," Sango demanded, and it was then that Kagome noticed the metallic mask covering her mouth and nose. Her jaw dropped. She hadn't even seen Sango put it on.

"Don't get too close, you'll breathe it in." Sango's eyes stayed glued to Inuyasha. Kagome watched as a small, skinny blade slipped out from its hidden spot in her sleeve. Her blood ran cold.

"Sango, wait,  _wait!_ " She pleaded, sinking to her knees. Inuyasha's face was a mask of pain, jaw locked and perspiration gathering on his brow. He wasn't fighting her off, which meant something was very wrong. "What did you do to him?" She asked, desperate to stall.

"Can't… fucking move." Inuyasha grit out through his teeth. He grunted when Sango lifted his head and slammed it back onto the floor.

"Youkai poison," Sango said, "and Kagome if you get too close it will affect you too. Stay back."

"How the hell did you get youkai poison?" Kagome wondered, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Does it matter? This bastard tried to kill me. Tried to kill  _us_."

What was the right thing to do? Kagome didn't know. Sango was right, Inuyasha had been nothing but pushy and scary since she released him from his imprisonment, yet… yet despite all that, there was something off about it all. Inuyasha could have easily snapped Sango's neck, but he hadn't. He could have easily thrown Kohaku against the wall hard enough to kill him, but he hadn't. He could have taken the discarded gun Kagome had been ordered to bring to him and shot her with it, but he'd crushed the thing until it was unusable instead.

There were a hundred opportunities for him to kill them, but he  _hadn't_. And on top of all that he saved her.

Was it right for Sango to kill him?

No.

"No!" Kagome cried as Sango's arm pulled back again to deliver the final blow. She threw herself over Inuyasha's face and shoulders, shielding him with her body.

"Shit, Kagome, what are you doing?" Sango yelled, trying to pry her away from the Youkai. But Kagome refused to budge. She felt slight dizziness, but whatever the poison had been must have already been sucked mostly into Inuyasha's lungs, because she didn't seize up and fall over like he had. Instead, she formed a sort of cocoon over his upper body, her hair splayed out in a curtain over her head, her arms wrapped under her forehead. She could see Inuyasha's face in the enclosed space. She watched as his eyes closed, as he inhaled deeply.

"You… smell good." He said.

Kagome's heart skipped a beat. "What?"

"You smell good," he repeated, "like vanilla and cherry blossom."

She stared at him. Her soap. He could smell her soap. He wasn't moving save for his chest; whatever poison Sango had given him had paralyzed him somehow. But with Kagome over him like this, he seemed… calm, almost. Like he wasn't going to fight it off if she was there to protect him.

Oh man, she was going crazy. She had no idea what the hanyou was thinking. For all she knew, he was planning on killing her and Sango as soon as the paralysis wore off. But she didn't think so. She didn't  _want_  to think so.

"Kagome!" Sango shouted, furious that she kept getting in the way. Kagome lifted her head and turned to look over her shoulder.

"Sango, you can't kill him."

"Oh yeah? Just watch me. Get. Out. Of the. Way."

Kagome set her jaw. "No. You can't. He saved my life. Kikyou was going to kill me and he saved my life. If you kill him, it will be like taking my life for granted." She felt her face warm at the rage in Sango's eyes. Her best friend had never looked at her that way before, she had never seen Sango so angry.

"Please," Kagome begged. "He was wrong to attack us earlier, I know that but he could have killed us all and he didn't."

"Bitch shot me first," Inuyasha mumbled under her, low enough for only her to pick up. She ignored him and kept going.

"He only needs me to collect the jewel shards, he could have killed you and Kohaku and forced me to go with him, but he didn't.  _Please_ , Sango!" For a few agonizingly long moments, Kagome thought Sango was going to push her off and just finish the job. But then her face relaxed, just a bit, and her arm lowered. She sat back on her heels and dragged a hand back through her hair, then pulled the mask away from her face.

"Kagome," she started, shaking her head, "he's a youkai, which makes him dangerous. I can't have him in this house anymore."

Kagome frowned but nodded. It was Sango's house, she certainly couldn't force her to let Inuyasha stay here. Sango stood and moved back to the kitchen sink, where she turned the faucet on and splashed water on her face. Kagome sat up and looked down at Inuyasha. His eyes were still closed, his chest still rising and falling in a steady rhythm.

"Will it… will the poison wear off?" She asked, dreading the answer.

There was a pause, then the water stopped running and Sango stepped back into view, her face damp. "Yes. It's just paralysis poison, it won't kill him."

Relief washed through her, although she wasn't sure if it was because Inuyasha wasn't going to die, or because Sango had yet to become a killer. A thought struck her then. "Where did you even get paralysis poison?"

The corners of her lips quirked up into a smile, that same amused, I-have-a-secret-and-it's-awesome smile that she'd come to know so well over the years. "Apparently, martial arts is not the only thing my parents' practice." She said.

"Youkai hunting is my fucking guess," Inuyasha moaned as he slowly pushed his head off the ground, supporting his upper body on his elbows.

"Oh!" Kagome exclaimed, turning towards him. "You can move!" She instinctively reached out, placing her palm on his forehead. He didn't feel like he had a fever, even though his brow was slick with perspiration. "You should probably lie down for a bit."

His eyes moved to hers, and he reached up with his hand, gripping at her wrist. "Keh. I'm fine, wench, stop mothering me." Then he froze, his eyes widening, and Kagome felt a sudden shock run through her. She was hyper-aware of the skin his fingers touched. She couldn't move her eyes from his, and if he kept moving closer to her like that she was going to lose it.

"Ah- _hem_." Sango cleared her throat, and Inuyasha pushed her arm away. Kagome was left feeling cold and detached.

"Well, I'm getting the hell out of here." Inuyasha pushed himself all the way up, his legs wobbling dangerously under his weight.

"Do that," Sango replied, eyes narrowed.

Kagome forced herself not to glare at her friend. She stood alongside Inuyasha and held her hands out to steady him, but he shook them away.

"Next time you think of using any of that weak poison shit on me, you'd better be prepared to finish me off." He threatened.

Sango pushed away from the counter, and the hidden dagger slid out from her sleeve again. "Don't try me, Youkai. I may have just learned of your existence, and I may have just learned of my heritage, but I can promise you that I have been training my whole life to defend myself against you. Kagome's protection only goes so far."

Inuyasha's lips pulled back in a snarl, and Sango stepped back into a stance.

"Stop it! Just stop it!" Kagome exclaimed, throwing herself between them, her hands held out as if she could push both of them away. She couldn't, of course, they were both much stronger than she was. "Stop fighting, I can't take it anymore. Sango, Inuyasha and I will leave."

" _You_  don't have to go, Kagome, I just want  _him_  to-"

"I have to go home anyway, mom is going to kill me for staying out so… late…" As she spoke the words, her heart skipped a beat, and the last thing Miroku had said as she and Inuyasha fled slammed into her.

_"Let the doppelganger know there's a little present waiting for her at home!"_

"Oh." Kagome took a step back, her eyes wide and horrified. She could feel both Sango and Inuyasha's eyes on her, but their stupid, petty problems were not in the forefront of her mind anymore.

"What is it?" Inuyasha growled.

"My  _family_!" She exclaimed, terrified that they were dead. "How could I forget?! It was that stupid sifting you dragged me through, I... I..."

He stepped forward and grabbed her upper arm, ignoring the warning glare from Sango. "What about your family?"

"Miroku said something, right before we sifted, that there was a present waiting for me at home."

Realization dawned over Sango's face, and she became as pale as Kagome felt.

"Keh," Inuyasha said, whirling around and stalking towards the front door, dragging Kagome behind him. "I'll take you there. Show me the way."

She could feel the panic rising inside of her, feel the irrational thoughts flashing through her head. "What if… what if she killed them? Inuyasha, what if she killed my family and-"

"Oi, wench. Look at me!" He gripped her chin tight in his clawed fingers and forced her eyes to meet his. "Calm down. You don't know what she'd done, it could just be an empty threat."

His eyes were piercing. They impaled her. She couldn't catch her breath, couldn't breathe. And then, as if a switch went off, she was calm again. She could hear his heart beating, and she regulated her breathing to match his.

"You calm?" He asked.

She nodded.

"Get on my back. We'll make sure your family is okay."

 

 

 


	19. Kagome's Family

 

Kagome

"I am  _not_  getting on your back."

Inuyasha quirked an eyebrow, arms folded over his chest, ears twitching atop his head. At this point all of the poison must have seeped out of him, because Kagome could tell he had control over every action now. She knew from his amused expression that he was going to argue.

"Why not?"

Why not?  _Why not?_  Because his simple touch made her skin warm up and her mind get fuzzy and she kept replaying every time he'd kissed her over and over in her head, that's why. If innocent touching did all that, she knew for sure she could not handle being pressed against his back, especially when he wasn't wearing a shirt!

But damn if she was going to let him know  _that_.

"I'm not riding on your back like a horse!" She snapped, trying her best not to blush and failing miserably.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes as he reached for her wrist again and tugged her towards the front door. "Come on, I don't have time to argue about this with you. Daylight will be here soon, and riding my back is the fastest way for us to travel."

"Uh…" Kagome argued, but she couldn't really find a rebuttal for that. She half-heartedly struggled against him, but she knew it was useless. And she  _was_  worried about her family, even if her initial panic had, for some reason she couldn't quite understand, subsided.

Inuyasha opened the front door and led Kagome outside before pulling his hair to the side. With deft fingers, he braided the long, milky-white strands into a thick braid over his shoulder. She was left with a perfect view of his back, and it was just as defined as his front. The world she lived in was just not fair. She gulped and tried unsuccessfully not to follow the lines of muscle that ran down to his butt, which was still mercifully covered by his borrowed pants.

She must have been standing there for an awkward amount of time, because Inuyasha turned to look at her over his shoulder. "What the hell are you waiting for, let's go!"

Pulled out of her revere, Kagome sighed and stepped towards him, placing her hands on his shoulders. She suddenly felt horribly embarrassed, and could not for the life of her force herself to climb on.

"For fuck's sake wench, what the hell is taking you so long?" He barked, and his hands swooped under her knees and lifted her to his back himself, pressing her legs into his side.

She tried desperately to keep as much of herself from touching him as possible, which was in turn proving to be  _im_ possible. As he straightened up to his full six-foot-whatever height, she was forced to wrap her arms around his neck for fear of falling off and cracking her head on the pavement. She felt his chuckle reverberate though him.

"Hey, don't laugh at me!" She chided.

"Sorry, sorry," he continued to chuckle through his apology. "Don't worry, I won't drop you."

Sango stepped outside then, stopping short at the sight of the two of them. Her eyes narrowed, but she didn't comment on it. She kept her eyes solely on Kagome. "You want me to come with you?" She asked.

Even though she was being a bit harsh towards Inuyasha, Kagome knew that Sango was as worried about her family as she was. "That would be nice," she said, meaning every word.

Inuyasha shook his head. He took a step back and bared his teeth. "No way am I carrying you on my back, slayer-bitch. I trust you about as much as I trust my own damn brother – and I don't trust him at all."

"I wouldn't get on your back if it were the only ride out of hell." She spat back. "Don't worry, I know my own way. I'll check on Kohaku and meet you there, Kagome."

"Your brother is fine, I didn't fucking harm the brat."

"Can we please stop the bickering until I at least know my family is okay?" Kagome intervened before they got out of hand again. "Sango, I'll see you at my place."

"Fine." She said, before turning back into her house and slamming the door shut behind her.

"Bitch." Inuyasha muttered.

"Hey, that's my best friend you're talking about."

"She's still a bitch." He growled

"And you tried to strangle her up against a wall. I think you guys might be about even." She was somewhat surprised when his only rebuttal was a grunt.

"Which way?" He asked, then rolled his eyes when she pointed to the left. "We're not walking down the street, we're going  _over_  the street.  _Which way_?"

Sighing, not bothering to argue with him over it, she pointed north through a block of developed houses.

"Get ready," he warned. He didn't wait for a reply before crouching down onto his heels and shooting straight up into the air.

Kagome felt the ear-splitting shriek streaming from her lips as her stomached dropped down into her feet. Her hair whipped around her face, and suddenly they were up, up, up, higher than Sango's roof, higher than the trees. Dark night sky filled her vision, and she squeezed her knees against him as hard and she could and hid her face into his shoulder. Holy shit, she was going to die.

"Oi, knock it off with the screaming, you're hurting my ears!"

She immediately clamped her teeth shut as she felt the free-fall back down to earth, her tummy doing somersaults. She waited for the jarring impact of concrete and bone, but was pleasantly surprised when Inuyasha's landing – and subsequent leap into the air – was smooth and effortless. After two or three more bounds her stomach settled into the rhythm, and at the fourth, she chanced a peek from his shoulder, keeping her eyes skyward, not daring a look down. The few hundred or so stars she could see seemed to expand, to fly towards her as she and Inuyasha leapt into the atmosphere. The air she breathed in was crisp and cool, and she eased back a little, letting the wind catch her hair in a way that sent it tumbling and tossing behind her. She kept her grip tight on his bare shoulders, her elbows locked straight, and she leaned back as far as she could.

Exhilarating.

Breathtaking.

Intoxicating.

She was flying.  _Flying_. Up into space and back down to earth again. The rooftops rushed up at her faster and faster, and then they were gone, and she was in her own bubble of unblemished, unmarred  _perfection_  surrounded by the night sky.

"Keep your eyes out, Kagome. Are we getting close?"

"I can't look down!" She gasped, her voice breathless in her own ears.

"Keh!" Inuyasha stayed earthside when he landed this time, and turned his chin over the shoulder not supporting his hair. "Which way?"

Getting her bearings long enough to figure out where they were, Kagome pointed a bit more to the west this time. "That way, about ten or so blocks down."

"Got it." He said, then crouched and leapt into the air again.

This time Kagome was ready for it. She locked her eyes skyward and leaned back again. A holler of excitement passed her lips this time, not a scream of terror, and she picked one hand up, reaching towards the stars as if she could catch a handful between her fingers and take them home.

It felt so  _right_ , flying like this on Inuyasha's back, the wind in her hair, the feeling of weightlessness as the youkai moved fluidly beneath her. Too soon it would over as Kagome led the way to her house.

Inuyasha landed at the bottom of the shrine steps and allowed her to climb off his back. She was struck aware of the sudden loss of warmth and tried not to think about it too much.

"A shrine? You live in a shrine?" Inuyasha asked, bringing her out of her thoughts. His golden eyes turned to lock onto hers. "You're a shrine maiden?"

Kagome shrugged her shoulders. "What?" She asked, and she could feel that her voice hadn't lost the breathlessness from the ride over. "It's not so uncommon today, there are still lots of shrines around. Besides, it's not like I practice or anything, much to the dismay of my grandfather."

The tips of his mouth curved into an amused smile, and Kagome was again caught up in him. She felt adrenaline rushing through her veins, left over from flying amongst the stars. She was alive and giddy, and more than anything, she wanted to kiss him.

Something about her face must have changed, because suddenly, Inuyasha's eyes turned dark, mirroring her own desire. The air between them sizzled, she couldn't look away from him. She let him gather her up in his arms, felt them wrap securely around her waist and her feet leave the ground as he pulled her to him. He was going to kiss her, she knew, his lips millimeters away from her own. He paused there, and she couldn't think straight, couldn't string together a comprehensive rationalization. She didn't want to. She just wanted him to kiss her!

"What the hell are you doing to me?" He growled, before crushing his lips to her.

What the hell was she doing to him? What the hell was  _he_  doing to  _her_? She was the one going crazy, constantly plagued by thoughts of him, constantly wanting to touch him, to taste him, just like she was doing now.

He backed her up into the torii gate at the base of the stairs so she was pressed between the rough, painted wood and his hard chest. He kissed her there, his hands wrapping in her hair, pressing his need up against her. Her hands moved across his abdomen, memorizing the lines that rippled across before her hand moved up to rub an ear.

He moaned into her, and she could feel her hands trembling like her insides were trembling. She was going to explode. He'd kissed her enough times now that she knew what to expect, yet it still shocked her to the core, the way her toes curled, they way her fingers dug into him, the way she responded to him with just as much intensity. He drew back slowly from the kiss, hooded eyes gazing into her. "Kagome." He said, and she shuttered at hearing him say her name.

"Ah-" was all she could say back as he bent to nip and lap at the sensitive skin where her neck and shoulder met.

"What the fuck are you doing to me?" He repeated, his hands moving up her sides to cup her breasts. She leaned into him, her body craving more. "I need you right now."

"Me too." She breathed, tugging at his ear, pulling his mouth up to hers again. "I need you right now too."

He kissed her, again and again, and she felt herself melting into him. "Inuyasha, please?" She begged between kisses. She could feel how wet she was for him, the throbbing between her thighs a steady rhythm with her heartbeat. She vividly remembered how he'd pressed his fingers into her on Sango's rooftop, the way they'd stretched her open and filled her. Her body ached to be filled again. He needed to fill her again  _right now_.

" _Please_!" She begged.

Something changed in him then. He stiffened, and his lips stopped moving on hers, and he pulled back, eyes wide and clear.

What the hell was he doing? He should be kissing her, he should be pulling her closer, not gently setting her down on her feet and stepping away.

"Fuck." He growled.

"Inuyasha, what? What's wrong, did I-"

"Shut up," he snapped. "You didn't do anything, just… stop talking for a second." He closed his eyes and took a deep, visible breath.

Kagome's mind scrambled, trying to figure out why he'd suddenly pushed her away. She was still shaking, her need for him so strong.

He sighed and opened his eyes. They were clear still, all traces of the hooded lust that had been swimming in them earlier gone. "We can't do this right now Kagome, we need to check on your family."

Her family! "Oh. Oh yeah. I, uh… forgot." She said. And she had. She'd forgotten to be afraid for her family, although she hadn't forgotten the threat against them. That worried Kagome. Or at least, it  _should_  have worried her.

…Now that she thought about it, she hadn't been worried for her family the whole ride over. She'd been exhilarated instead, her body pumping with adrenaline, excited to be flying amongst the stars. And then of course, she'd been consumed with thoughts of Inuyasha. Inuyasha, Inuyasha, Inuyasha.

It didn't make sense to her. It was like there was a wall of some kind, a mental block. Her family was in danger. And her mind didn't give a damn.

Something was very wrong. But she couldn't put her finger on it. It was something she would need help with. She couldn't figure it out on her own.

"Inuyasha…" she started, following him as he made his way up the steps. She touched her hand to her lips. They felt swollen from his kisses. "I think we have a problem."

"Yeah, your family, that's why we're here."

"No, not my family – I mean,  _yes_ , my family is a problem, but this is different. I can't…" How could she explain what it was that was happening to her? "…I feel like one of my emotions have been completely turned off. Like there's a specific fear section of my brain that's been cut out and now there's a big empty hole there."

He didn't turn to look at her, just kept his pace moving up the steps. "Are you trying to tell me you don't experience fear? Cause you seemed pretty damn scared to me when we started the ride over here."

Kagome bit her lip. She  _had_  been scared when Inuyasha had taken that first jump into the sky, but this different. Fear wasn't the right word, it was…

 _Worry_.

"Why am I not worried about what's happened to my family?" She asked as they reached the top of the steps and made their way across the front courtyard.

"Your grandfather doesn't have any shields or barriers set up or anything, does he?"

Kagome huffed in annoyance. He was avoiding her question. "No, he sells love talismans and good luck charms."

"Good, you can never be too careful." He said as they reached Kagome's front door. He moved to grip the handle but Kagome stepped in front of his hand, blocking his way.

"Answer me."

He pulled back, his eyes darting away. "Answer  _what_?"

"Why am I not worried about what's happened to my family?" She repeated, her tone much more firm this time. "I was terrified for them, I  _remember_  being terrified for them, so why am I so calm about it now?"

He took a step back and folded his arms across his chest. "Keh." He said. "How should I know?"

Kagome narrowed her eyes at him. Something wasn't adding up here. She has been out of her mind with worry, and then-

" _Calm down!"_  He'd told her.

Demanded her.

Calm down.

Her eyes widened in shock. "You… You  _spelled_  me!" She accused, a shaking finger pointing straight at the guilty party. "You  _spelled_  me into being calm! You turned me into one of your zombies!" Her voice had grown to a high-pitched screech and she bared her teeth in anger.

"O-oi!" Inuyasha said, taking another step back. "Don't freak out."

"Freak out?  _Freak out?!_  You have two choices, hanyou, you either un-spell me  _right this instant_  or I fry your brains out!" She cried, raising both her hands to show off the sparking energy that had, in the last few seconds, appeared with her anger.

"What else have you been spelling me to do?" She continued, wracking her brains to remember all her actions during the past week. Everything at the moment was blurring together with her anger. What had he made her do?

A horrible thought shot straight through her. The kiss under the tori gate. Had he spelled her to kiss him? Was Sango right about it all? Was he spelling her to need him so much?

"Would you fucking listen to me before you try to purify me?" He snapped, dodging as she swung at him.

"Talk. Fast." She seethed.

"Yeah, so I spelled you, okay? But you were on the verge of panic and panic is not a good thing. I didn't want you freaking out and falling off my back on the way over."

"What else have you spelled me to do?"

" _Nothing_!"

"Why do I need you so bad? Why can't I stop thinking about you?"

"Oi, if you're obsessed with me it's not because of anything I've done, you crazy bitch!"

"Don't lie to me!"

"I'm not lying!" He roared, dodging her again. "I haven't spelled you to do anything other than stay calm over your family, dammit!"

"Undo it!" She roared back.

He stopped, his eyes narrowing. "Kagome, I don't think-"

" _Undo it!_ "

He inhaled deeply, then let his breath rush out in one big whoosh. "Fine." He growled, stalking over to her and grabbing at her shoulders. "Look me in the eyes."

She raised her lashes and glared into that unique golden color she still couldn't seem to get enough of.

"Kagome, your family is in danger. You shouldn't be so calm."

For a few moments nothing happened. Then terror slammed into her. Oh god, she was going to be sick! She whipped around and dashed for the front door, yanking it open and rushing inside.

It was pitch black, the inside lights were off. If what Miroku had said was just a bluff, they should be sleeping soundly in their beds, but if not…

She flicked the kitchen lights on and raced for the stairs.

"Mama?! Souta?! Jiji?!" She cried, taking the steps two at a time and slamming her mother's bedroom door open. "Mama!"

The room was dark, her mother's bed unmade. Although she could see the room clearly enough she still turned on the lights to make sure. She also checked the adjoining bathroom and closet.

Finding not one trace of her mother save for the smell of her perfume that always saturated the room, Kagome rushed to her grandfather's room, finding it in the same state: empty. Souta's room was dark and quiet and deserted as well.

Slowly, the stark loneliness creeping through her chest and enveloping her heart, Kagome crawled into her littler brother's bed, pulling the recently-washed sheets over her head and curling up into a ball.

She tried really hard not to cry.

She failed.

She wasn't sure how long she lay there, but it didn't seem like more than a few minuets before Inuyasha quietly entered the room and lay a clawed hand on her covered shoulder.

"Oi." He said softly.

Kagome sniffed.

"Hey, are you crying?"

"No." She lied, but her wavering voice betrayed her.

"Well stop it." He demanded, but his voice didn't match his words. He kept his tone calm and quiet. "You need to be strong for your family."

Sighing, Kagome pulled the sheets away from her face. Inuyasha kneeled over her, his braided hair hanging down over his shoulder, his eyes sharp and focused. She tried to think back to the moment when his features, although always beautiful to her, had stopped being so alien. She wondered what her mom would have thought about his ears. Would she have cringed in horror or reached up to give them a feel?

Not that it mattered right now.

"My family is gone." She said, all cares about spelling dissipated for the moment. "Do you think Kikyou killed them?" As she allowed herself to speak the words she felt her eyes immediately fill with unleashed tears. Her vision was too blurred to see Inuyasha's hand reach towards her, and she jumped a bit when she felt the rough pads of his fingertips on the sensitive skin under her eyes.

She couldn't help the gasp that slipped between her lips as he wiped at her tears as they fell from her face.

"No." He finally answered. "I don't think she killed them. Come with me."

Kagome stiffened for a moment, wondering if he'd spelled her again, but her panic was still tight in her chest, she was still scared for her family and she didn't  _want_  to follow him, she wanted to stay curled up in her brother's bed and cry herself to sleep. She couldn't feel an emotional block in her head. All these things told her he hadn't spelled her. He was just being gentle with her.

So she let him slip his hand between her fingers, let him help her off the bed. She followed him down the hallway and the stairs and into the family room.

"I found this." He said, picking up a deep green envelope that had been placed on the coffee table and holding it up for her to see. It was small for an envelope and a perfect square, with Kagome's name written in gold in large, fancy, looping letters. Kagome had never seen anything quite like it.

"What is it?" She asked.

"It's a message. From Kikyou." His eyes turned hard and he set his jaw. She could see his muscle jump as he clenched his teeth in anger.

Kagome's eyes widened as she grabbed the envelope from his hands and ripped it open. The paper she pulled out was square and flat and the color of eggshell. There was nothing on it.

"What is this?" She looked up at Inuyasha, confused. But he didn't have to answer, because just then a small hologram popped up from the center of the paper, a miniature Kikyou stood on the palm of Kagome's hand.

"Doppelganger, it wasn't so hard tracking your family down. I want you to remember how easily it is that I can find you and your family, and how easy it is that they bend to my will."

Kagome's mouth fell open and her eyes darted to Inuyasha, who was listening intently to the message.

"You have something I want, and now I have something you want. I propose an exchange. I will give you back your family if you cease helping Inuyasha at once and deliver him in the morning in his mirror. I will erase your memories, and this time I promise you will not get them back. You will be able to live in peace with your family without the burden of knowing of youkai and their toll on this world. I will give you until noon to make this exchange. If you decide to ignore this message, I will be forced to harm your family. On the piece of paper is the address where we will meet.

She disappeared then, and Kagome and Inuyasha stood in a tense silence. Kikyou's words sunk in, and Kagome knew exactly what she had to do.

"Inuyasha…" she started.

"No." He said. "Hell no. No fucking way am I going back to being under that bitch's control. Fuck no!" He started pacing back and forth across the carpeted floor.

"Inuyasha, you  _heard_  her, she'd going to hurt my family!"

"I'm sorry for your family, Kagome, but there is no way in hell I'm going back!"

The panic started to kick in again. "You'll let her kill them? You'll let her kill my mom and my twelve-year-old brother and my eighty-year-old grandfather? They're innocent in all this! They're all I have, my only family, Inuyasha you can't be that cruel!"

"Cruel?  _Cruel?!_ " He roared, turning on her, his eyes wild and his fangs bared. "You don't know the meaning of cruel! You have no idea what that  _bitch_  makes me do under her control. You have no idea the nightmare-inducing acts I've been forced to commit! Cruel would be taking me back and handing me over!"

Taken aback at his outburst, Kagome could only shake her head in disbelief. "What does she make you do that's so awful?"

"You don't want to know." He growled.

"I do! I want to know what she makes you do that makes you hate her so much!"

"She fucking makes me hunt down and kill youkai and hanyou." He said, his voice shaking with barely-suppressed rage. "She makes me track down youkai, ones that have done  _nothing_  to harm humans, ones that are doing nothing but living their lives peacefully and rip their fucking throats out. Every fucking time I get out of the mirror I murder ten more of my people. And that's not even the worse of it." He stopped then, breathing heavily, pinning her down with his gaze, anger radiating from every inch of him.

"Don't you fucking talk to me about  _cruel_." He sneered, then turned his back to her.

Stunned into silence, Kagome felt her cheeks dampen again. The horror of what Inuyasha had been through was too much for her. How could she turn him in, if that's what he was forced to do?

But how could she not, for her family?

She reached out towards his back, wanting desperately to comfort him, but not knowing how, even the smallest bit.

"Inuyasha, I-" She started, her mind a tumble. What could she do? How could she fix this so her family stayed alive and Inuyasha was safe from murdering his own people?

She didn't have to think too long though, because a quiet knock sounded on the door.

Both Inuyasha and Kagome stiffened at the same time, and Inuyasha growled, low and long.

"Who the hell…? Kagome wondered, turning to peer through the kitchen and to the front door. It was five in the morning, who could have been visiting so early? "Kikyou?" She wondered aloud.

She heard Inuyasha sniff beside her. "No." He said. "Doesn't smell like her."

"Maybe the paper boy?" She said and moved to the front door as the mystery guest knocked again. She reached for the door handle and turned the knob.

"Kagome!" Hojou said, smiling that cute smile. He stood on her front doorstep, in jeans and a hoodie, his hair tasseled from what Kagome could only assume was sleep.

"Hojou!" She cried, utterly confused. "What are you doing here?"

"Sango called me and woke me up, said I needed to get over here fast, that it was an emergency?" He said, stepping through the doorway. Dumbfounded, Kagome stepped aside to let him in.

"She  _what_?!"

"She called me. What's the emergency?"

Kagome opened her mouth to reply, but her faced drained of color when she heard the low, warning growl from behind her. She opened her mouth to warn him to run, but it was too late. Inuyasha pounced, grabbing Hojou by the front of his shirt and slamming him back into the kitchen wall.

"Who the  _fuck_  are you?" He growled.

 


	20. The Thing About Hojou...

 

Sango

Sango followed a safe distance behind Kagome and the youkai, her eyes never leaving the back of his head. She meant it when she told Kagome she didn't want him in her house. After the shit he pulled with them earlier, he was lucky he was still alive.

He  _had_  saved Kagome's life, and Sango was nothing if not honorable. She loved Kagome like a sister. Letting Inuyasha go was paying a debt for returning her friend safely, but if he stepped inside her house again she'd kill him.

As Sango moved out onto the porch she froze at the sight of Kagome climbing onto his back. Her initial reaction was to reach out and rip her best friend away from the dangerous youkai, but she squashed that urge deep down. She bit the insides of her cheeks, straining to keep her mouth shut. Her fingers clenched into tight fists at her sides, willing herself to stay in control. She kept her eyes locked on her best friend. "You want me to come with you?" She asked, half hoping Kagome would take her up on her offer, and half hoping she wouldn't.

"That would be nice." The overwhelming sincerity in Kagome's answer didn't go unnoticed.

Inuyasha growled then, showing off more of his youkai traits. "No way am I carrying you on my back, slayer-bitch. I trust you about as much as I trust my own damn brother – and I don't trust him at all."

Sango lost control of her temper a bit. She said her words as if she were spitting on him. "I wouldn't get on your back if it were the only ride out of hell. Don't worry, I know my own way." She gave a curt nod to Kagome then, needing Inuyasha gone as soon as possible. "I'll check on Kohaku and meet you there, Kagome."

"Your brother is fine, I didn't fucking harm the brat."

Sango was going to throttle him. She felt her heartbeat pounding out the rhythm of her anger, throbbing in her chest, the need to finish him off rushing through her-

"Can we please stop the bickering until I at least know my family is okay?" Kagome's voice cut sharply through Sango's rage, and she instantly regained her self-control. "Sango, I'll see you at my place."

"Fine," Sango said, relieved that she didn't lose it right then and there. She turned on her heel and slammed the door behind her, then quickly moved to the window to watch the pair as they started to argue.

Damn Inuyasha. Damn him. The only reason she had been able to subdue him so quickly before was due to the element of surprise. Without that at her side, he was going to be harder to take down. And she didn't want Kagome in the middle of it when she tried again.

Besides, now he knew Sango's true intentions. He was going to be wary of her from now on. She was going to have to get a lot more practice actually killing youkai, and quickly. Either that or she'd need backup.

It was like the gears in her head clicked into place.

Backup.

She watched from behind the curtain as Kagome pointed off in the general direction of her house, and Inuyasha crouched down and shot up into the night sky.

Backup.

Her parents. She needed to call her parents. Now that the youkai was out of her house and Kagome was, for the most part, fairly safe, Sango had the wits about her to actually think her actions through.

Her parents would rush right over from their training seminar. They'd be back by morning, and then they'd help her hunt down and kill Inuyasha, and then Kagome would  _truly_  be safe, and they wouldn't have to worry about magical spells or haughty, cocky, overbearing youkai barging into her house and stealing her friend away into the dead of night.

Sango rushed up into her bedroom, where Kohaku was still crumpled up on her bed. She went to his side and placed her hands on his cheeks, leaning in close to check his breathing. He moaned, soft and low, but he was breathing and no arms or legs appeared to be broken. Quickly Sango moved to her desk, swiping up her cell phone and flipping it open to see a purikura photo of her and Kagome making silly faces into the camera. Sighing out of pure frustration she hit the button to call her father.

It rang. And rang. Just before it went to voicemail he picked up, out of breath and voice strained.

"Hello?"

"Dad!" Sango cried as she flopped bonelessly into her desk chair. She'd never been more relieved to hear his voice.

"Sango, what is it? I'm in the middle of – dammit! – training!"

"Well, you should stop training and listen to me for five seconds. It's an emergency."

He paused on the other line, and Sango heard scuffling and grunting.

"Hold on one second!" He finally said, the noises continuing. Frowning, Sango straightened up and pulled the phone away from her ear, glaring down at it. Had he actually picked up her call and then continued a sparring match?

After a few seconds of scuffling and grunting – a few screams and shrieks of terror as well? Or was it just her imagination? – and her father was back, a bit more breathless than before. "What is it Sango? What's the emergency? Is your brother okay?"

"He's fine, but…" She hesitated, worried for a split second that she'd dreamt the whole thing up - the mirror, Inuyasha, the secret basement under her house. None of this was normal. A rational person would have gone insane at this point. But there was no way to tell him other than to just spit it out. "Dad, I found the secret room. I found your recording."

He didn't reply.

"About the youkai…" She said, her voice raising in uncertainty at his lack of response.

"How did you find it?" He asked, his tone rough and… did she detect anger?

"One of them got into the house. A youkai."

" _What_?"

She could feel his anger through the phone. "Dad, this youkai broke into my bedroom and attacked me and Kagome. He threw Kohaku across the room. I had your gun and I shot him, but it... it missed, and then he grabbed me and he-"

"Sango!" Her father shouted through the phone, cutting her off. "Are you hurt?"

"No, I'm fine, but I remembered what you said about the laundry downstairs, and I found the room and-" She was babbling. She could hear her voice shaking and she was talking way too fast. Taking a deep, steadying breath, willing herself not to cry, she clutched her phone in both her hands, trying to keep herself together. "Dad, can you and mom come home? I don't think I can handle this with just Kohaku and myself." She felt her face flush with shame.

He sighed, loud and heavy through the line. "I'm sorry baby girl, I can't." He said, and Sango felt her chest tighten in panic. "Now that you know the truth about our family though, I can tell you that your mother and I are not at a training seminar."

She sat up straight in her chair at his confession. "What?"

"We're not at a seminar, we're on a slaying hunt."

"…. _What_?!" Sango cried, all present concerns momentarily forgotten. "What are you saying? Are you… Are you  _slaying_  a youkai while you're on the phone with me?"

He paused, and through his silence, Sango listened more intently to the muffled noises in the background.

"You've got to be  _fucking_  kidding me!" Sango yelled, standing abruptly from her desk chair, causing it to clatter noisily to the floor.

"Hey, young lady! Language!"

"You've been going off on these dangerous missions without telling me about it?!" She cried, ignoring his lame attempts to remind her who she was talking to. At the moment, Sango didn't care who she was talking to. All this crap was coming at her at once, it was too much. She whipped around when Kohaku moaned and turned onto his side, rubbing his right shoulder.

"Sango, we didn't have a choice, you and Kohaku are too young to come along and we-"

"I'm seventeen!" She shrieked into the phone, on the verge of truly flipping out. She paced back and forth across her bedroom floor, keeping watchful eyes on Kohaku as he slowly arose from oblivion.

"Calm down." Her father's voice had switched to the tone he used when trying to gain control of an argument. It always worked. Sango snapped her mouth shut.

"Your mother and I cannot come home right now, we have to finish the job, but you-"

"Dad, this youkai flung Kohaku across the room like he was a ragdoll! He almost choked the life out of me, you can't just leave me here to do this alone, I-"

" _Sango_."

Her teeth snapped shut again at his tone, but she couldn't help the frustrated tear that slipped over her lashes and trailed its way down her cheek. Sango's hand came up to furiously wipe away at the offending leaked water. She refused to cry. Refused.

"We're not abandoning you to fight this alone. There's someone who can help you there. I'm going to give you a number to call. Write it down. You ready?"

Biting back a frustrated grunt, Sango moved back to her desk and grabbed a pen and tore a piece of paper off her notepad. "Go ahead." She scribbled down the number as he recited it to her. "Who is he?" She asked.

"A friend. Sango, I have to help your mother, we'll be back soon. Call him, he'll help you take care of the problem. And stay smart, you understand? Youkai are dangerous. I've trained you your whole life for this, so remember what I taught you."

"Dad, I-"

"Love you baby girl." The phone cut off.

It took all of Sango's control not to chuck her phone against the far wall and watch it shatter into a million pieces. Instead, she moved to Kohaku's side. He was blinking up at the ceiling, his eyes confused and worried.

"…Sango?" He asked.

"Hey, you feeling okay?"

He nodded his head, and slowly sat up, looking around. "What happened?"

"Everything's okay, Kohaku," Sango said, trying to reassure him, but feeling more like she was reassuring herself. "That man won't be back to bother us anymore."

"I- I thought he was going to kill you."

"I took care of it." Sango reached out to run her hand through his hair. She ruffled it a little. "I'm just glad you're okay. I have a lot to tell you, but first I have to make a phone call. You feel sick? Nauseous?"

He shook his head.

"Okay good. I'll be right back. If anything hurts, shout for me." With another nod of confirmation, Sango stood and made her way out of her bedroom and into the hall. She took the stairs two at a time and headed straight for the kitchen. She stood over the spot where she had knocked Inuyasha to the ground earlier. What would have happened had Kagome allowed her to finish him off? What would it have felt like to slay her first youkai?

Her heart squeezed painfully in her chest. She would never have thought in her wildest nightmares that she would one day be standing in her very own kitchen debating about slaying  _anything_ , much less spell-weaving youkai. But this was what her life was now. Her father's confirmation made the whole ordeal so much more real. And this person he wanted her to call, this slayer that could help her… It meant she wasn't alone. Her family wasn't alone. There were other slayers out there.

She wondered what this person was like.

Well, she'd find out soon enough once she called him. Steadying her hands, she punched the numbers into her phone and waited.

He picked up on the second ring.

"Sango."

Shocked, she didn't reply right away. It was five in the morning, he should have been asleep. But whoever he was, he sounded awake and alert.

He also sounded familiar.

"Sango, you there? Is everything okay?"

There was something about the way he spoke that sentence that made it click for her. She immediately knew who he was. She inhaled sharply, reeling at the secret he had been keeping all this time.

"You've got to  _fucking_  be kidding me!" She roared.

.

.

Inuyasha

"Who the  _fuck_  are you?" Inuyasha growled, pushing as much menace behind his words as his voice would allow. He had the human's shirt fisted in his grasp, tangled in his claws. His knuckles were pressing into his chest, holding him up against the wall. He immediately couldn't stand this guy. He dug his knuckles into his chest harder and smirked when the human winced.

The bastard smelled like Kagome. Inuyasha's sensitive nose could pick up the trace scent of her on him. Which meant that she touched him. A lot. And now that he thought about it, he'd smelled this guy on Kagome back when she first pulled him from the mirror. It was all nonsensical smells back then, little details that he hadn't had time for, but  _now_  it bothered him.

It  _shouldn't_  bother him, because what the hell did he care who the wench was close to? Who she touched? Who she kissed?

 **Me.**  The youkai inside him growled.  **She kisses** _ **me**_ **.**  He tried to shove his youkai back, but it was fighting him, and it was pissing him off. Stupid doppelganger, kissing him like she wanted him, kissing him like she wanted nothing but him.  _"Why do I need you so bad?"_  She'd asked him.  _"Why can't I stop thinking about you?"_  And he'd been furious over being accused of spelling her to kiss him, so he'd called her things like 'obsessed' and 'crazy bitch,' while his youkai had been grinning inside.

 **Of course she needs you. Of course she can't stop thinking about you.**  His youkai had murmured comfortingly. And who the fuck would choose some simpering, cowering human male over someone like Inuyasha?

He frowned mentally, remembering Kagome's reactions to him after he'd been sucked back into the mirror that time. Her disgust for him. She claimed she was no racist, but he'd seen the same fear in others' eyes before her. He'd seen it over and over. Three-hundred years was a very long time to go through life as a half-breed.

Despite her wavering affections, Inuyasha  _still_  didn't like the fact that he could clearly smell her on this guy. He didn't fucking share the women he was planning to bed, and at this point, he'd be damned if Kagome wasn't going to be in his bed one way or another.

The human brought his hands up to tug at Inuyasha's arm, but that only made him tighten his grip and narrow his eyes in warning.

"L-let me go!" He demanded.

Inuyasha shook his head. "Answer my question."

Instead of obeying, the prick moved his wide, terrified eyes to Kagome, one hand reaching out towards her. "Ka-Kagome." He gasped.

Oh good, a second reason to dislike the bastard. The way he spoke to Kagome. Like he was worried for her safety. Ha. Her safety. As if she'd be in any danger when she was with him. ...Well, sure, Kikyou had gone after her, but that was hardly  _his_  fault.  _He_  wasn't the one born with the damn jewel in his side. But one thing was for sure, Kagome was safer under his watch then she would be under a stupid little human boy. And he sure as hell wasn't letting anything happen to the one person who could free him from the mirror other than Kikyou.

Inuyasha reached out and slapped his stretching fingers down, gripping him under the chin, squeezing at his cheeks so his lips scrunched together to look like some sort of malformed fish, and forced his gaze back to where it should be. "Oi, don't talk to her, talk to me."

That brought about the third thing he didn't like about this guy: his eyes. They'd been friendly enough when Kagome had first opened the door, true, and he guessed he could see why the human might be somewhat attractive to her, but they were also clear and calculating, although he was doing a damn good job of looking scared shitless.

None of that changed the fact that as soon as this Hojou guy had stepped through the door, a sharp chill had made its way up Inuyasha's spine.

So screw the fact that Kagome was currently pulling on his arm, demanding he let go of the human right this instant. He didn't fucking trust this guy, and he wasn't taking any damn chances.

"Kagome, back off," he growled, keeping his eyes on the bastard and pressure tight against his chest.

"Let go of him! Why are you always choking my friends out against a wall? Hojou isn't dangerous, he's my …my boyfriend!"

Inuyasha whipped his head around to glare down at her, his eyes narrowing. She was biting her bottom lip, her eyes downcast. ...At least the bitch admitted it. Keh. Boyfriend. He fought down the youkai rage growing inside him, threatening to break free. "Boyfriend, eh?" He asked, and he watched in satisfaction as the color slowly drained from her face.

"K-Kagome," Hojou managed to choke out. "Get back."

Inuyasha turned his gaze back to the human male, The youkai inside wanted to throttle him, and he was barely managing to reign it in. Although his human side wanted to throttle him too. "I guess that answers who you are. Kagome's little boyfriend. Now we just need to find out what the hell you're doing here."

"He can't answer you, you're choking him!"

He loosened his grip. Only slightly. "I'll ask one more time. What are you doing here?" His question was a threat, and from Hojou's wide eyes, it looked like the message was being received.

"Sango called me, she woke me up, asked me to come check on Kagome, something about her family...?" His voice trailed off and his eyes darted to Kagome. "Are they okay?"

Inuyasha let the growl rip from his throat as he pulled Hojou slightly away from the wall before slamming him back into it. He listened in satisfaction as the wind rushed out of his lungs. "Don't fucking talk to her, talk to me." He said, raising his voice over the youkai screaming at him from the inside. He could feel it trying to claw its way out, a heated pressure in the center of his chest.

"Hey man, I don't know who you are, or... or  _what_  you are, but Kagome is my girlfriend, and I'm talking to her."

 **Kagome's not his girlfriend if he's dead.**  His youkai said. "Kagome's not your girlfriend if you're fucking dead." Inuyasha seethed, aware that his youkai was slowly winning the fight.

"Inuyasha,  _don't_!" He heard Kagome cry from somewhere off to the side. He couldn't figure out where she was, dammit, he was too focused on controlling himself, on keeping himself in check. He could feel his control slipping away.

If this bastard didn't back down soon, he was going to turn full youkai. And then Hojou really  _would_  be dead. But this wasn't the time. Not yet. The thought of what he might do to Kagome if he turned made him push back harder. He glared up at Hojou, slowly pushing his youkai back, back, back into the far corner of his mind.

Something changed. It was a mental shift. Quickly Inuyasha dropped his elbows down, effectively blocking the uppercut meant for his ribs. "The fuck-" he started, eyes darting up to see the sharp change in Hojou's eyes, the small quirk of his mouth. His hands moved, almost too quick to see, in a swift upwards motion, causing Inuyasha's hand to fly away from his chest.

Then he came back for another punch, this one aimed at his jaw.

Inuyasha leaned back and felt the bare miss of Hojou's fist as it swung by him, then again, and again. Inuyasha dodged and spun out of the way, just able to avoid each attack, putting a bit more space in between them each time. The bastard was fast, but Inuyasha was faster. He slipped fluidly under Hojou's next attack and shot back up with an elbow to his solar plexus. Or, what  _should_  have been his solar plexus.

He hit forearms instead.

Hojou stared down at him, his face no longer terrified. He grinned. "Sango tells me you've been dragging my girlfriend around for the past few days. That's not the way you treat a girl,  _youkai_."

"That what the slayer bitch told you? Why don't you ask Kagome herself?" He growled, bringing his knee up to strike and slowing his movements down, just enough.

Hojou let his hands drop, falling for the bait, and Inuyasha swung a right hook, hard, cracking it against his jaw and sending the human flying across the room. He slammed into the far wall, plaster splinting from wood and sending the framed, hanging photos falling to the floor with a crash.

"So, it seems like Sango's family aren't the only slayers around here," Inuyasha said, cracking his knuckles to let Hojou know he was still good for more. If he could still stand after that last punch, that is. He hit him hard enough to do some serious damage, if not outright kill him.

"What the hell?  _What the hell_?!" Kagome cried from off to the right. He turned his gaze, narrowing his eyes at her accusingly. All these slayers popping up out of nowhere, all somehow connected to the doppelganger, it felt like one big, ugly trap.

"What the hell is right. Are  _all_  of your friend's slayers?"

"N-No!" She stuttered, her wide, beautiful eyes relaying her shock and confusion. "I mean, I don't  _think_  so."

"Then why the hell is your  _boyfriend_  trying to kill me?"  _ **Dead**_ **boyfriend**. His youkai growled. He fought against it, focusing his heated gaze on Kagome.

"How should I know?" She shot back. "It's not like it came up on the first date. 'Hi, my name's Hojou, and I like video games and healing remedies and  _slaying youkai_.'" She crossed her arms, mocking him in an unconvincing male voice.

It was a funny thought, and Inuyasha felt the corners of his mouth quirk up at her stubborn, angry face. He almost chuckled, until the human coughed from the slightly-caved-in wall.

What the hell? The bastard shouldn't be able to move. Inuyasha watched in almost-disbelief as Hojou moved his head around in a slow circle, cracking his neck and rubbing at his jaw, which was already starting to swell.

"Sorry Kagome," He apologized, pushing himself back onto his feet and wiping at the trickle of blood oozing from the corner of his mouth. "It's not like slaying is a first date sort of topic. More like a tenth date or so, wouldn't you say?" And then he grinned. And charged.

Inuyasha growled and extended his claws. He had to admit, he was impressed he could still stand. But he had enough of this shit. He was going to gut this Hojou guy straight through his chest, make a nice, round hole, rip his spine through his back and then pull it out his front.  **Do it.**  His youkai seethed, and he smirked in satisfaction, finally willing to let it take over. He pulled his arm back just as the human swung.

And then Inuyasha wasn't facing him anymore.

His viewpoint had changed instantly. One second the human was coming straight at him, and the very next, he was in the doorway, looking into the kitchen, watching Hojou's shocked face as his fist hit thin air and he crashed to the floor.

"Hojou!" Kagome cried, and Inuyasha watched as she raced over to the fallen human and knelt down next to him, putting her hands on his arm.

Rage brimmed over the top of his control. The urge to keep her away from something that might harm her filled him suddenly, left him thinking of nothing else. He had to get her away from him, he had to keep the situation under control until he figured out a way to get the hell out of Kikyou's spell. He stepped forward to stop her and promptly smacked into glass.

" _What the fuck_?" He roared, pounding his fist on the transparent wall. He looked up to see the rocky ceiling of his cell, just above his head. He was back in the mirror, trapped, and through his rage, what happened finally clicked into place.

The kitchen was lighter. Daybreak had come.

And Inuyasha was back in his mirror, helpless but to stand and watch as Kagome worried over someone who wasn't him.

His youkai boiled inside of him as he watched Kagome's bottom lip quiver, watched her call out Hojou's stupid name.

He was going to kill the fucker when he got back out.

 


	21. Guilt

 

Kagome

Guilt washed over Kagome. It consumed her. So much so that it almost washed away the anger she felt over Hojou's secret.

...Almost.

She stood on the sidelines, watching. Helpless as Hojou and Inuyasha fought. They moved so fast. Too fast. Fast enough that it was hard to keep track of who punched and who blocked. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, pumping the adrenaline through her. She felt sick to her stomach, worried for them both.

And so damn angry at them, too. Men were animals.

What was so wrong with just talking stuff out?

Kagome frowned as something golden and shiny caught her eye, drawing her attention away from the two fighting men - no,  _boys_  - the two immature, reckless  _boys_  for an instant. It was the corner of the white, glossy stove, sparkling in the stray beam of sunlight that peeked through the kitchen window curtains.

Kagome widened her eyes and turned, opening her mouth to warn him. Inuyasha pressed Hojou back, back, back, relentless with his attacks until he stepped into the sunlight.

And promptly disappeared.

Her warning shout quickly turned to a cry of alarm as Hojou, mid-attack, fell to the kitchen floor with a grunt and a loud crack, his skull bouncing off the tile.

"Hojou!" Kagome cried, dropping quickly to his side. He moaned as she probed his skull with her fingers, searching for split skin or oozing blood, and hissed when her fingers brushed over the growing lump at a spot right above his left ear. "That's a huge bump." She said, stating the obvious. There was a high probability of a concussion.

Hearing movement behind her, Kagome turned to see Sango lean against the kitchen counter, Inuyasha's spelled mirror propped up by her hands. "Someone left their magic mirror in my bedroom." She said, unamused.

Inuyasha growled from within his cell, and Kagome snapped her eyes over to glare at him. This was all his fault. It wasn't until he came along that her world had started to come undone at the seams. She wanted to go back to the time when all she had to worry about was standing up to Hiromi and her gang. At this point she felt being tied up in a utility closet was hardly something to get upset over.

"Oi. Get the hell away from him." Inuyasha demanded, ripping her back to the present. His palms pressed against the glass, his fangs bared, still in fight mode.

Kagome was tired of being ordered around. And she was tired of everything in her life falling apart bit-by-bit. So what if Hojou's kisses had somehow turned dull and uninteresting? At least he had been one thing in her life that had stayed normal. And now, on top of magic mirrors and slayer best friends and evil priestesses out to kill her family and sexy youkai that kept giving her bedroom eyes, Hojou's secret identity was the rotten cherry atop the melting ice-cream that had become her life.

So she did not, this time, take kindly to Inuyasha making demands. "Shut up or I'll smash the mirror with you inside." She threatened. "Hojou wouldn't harm a fly."

"He just tried to kill  _me_!" Inuyasha shouted.

"You attacked him first!" Kagome shouted back, eyebrows squished together in anger. She could feel the tiny pricks of tears gathering in her eyes, and quickly wiped them away. Now wasn't the time.

"Want me to put him in the closet?" Sango asked, sounding too smug for Kagome's liking. She opened her mouth to tell Sango to stay out of it when Hojou moaned again and rolled over, his hand coming up to touch his head.

Quickly, Kagome's attention was back on him, the guilt swallowing her up all over again. "Hojou, are you okay? Where does it hurt?" She asked, helping him into a sitting position. "Don't move too quickly, you might have a concussion."

His eyes blinked open and gazed down at her, and he wrapped her hands inside his own, a slow smile spreading across his handsome face. "I'll be okay, I heal fast. I have a thick skull."

Kagome shook her head, wondering if joking was a side effect of a concussion or not. "You hit your head pretty hard, I-"

"Don't worry about it, I'm fine. How about you?"

She stuck her bottom lip out at his stubbornness. "I'm not the one who cracked my head on the floor."

"I'm okay, I promise. The swelling will go down after a while, I'm used to bumps and scratches. I've had worse." He moved his hand, wrapping it around the back of her neck, forcing her eyes to lock onto his. "I was worried when Sango called. I rushed right over, I was afraid you were already dead."

She knew he was going to kiss her before he leaned down and pressed his lips to her own. His kiss was deep and passionate, and she felt the same big, fat  _nothing_  that she had the last time he'd kissed her. Nothing. Nothing, nothing,  _nothing_.

She didn't even bother to fight it this time, didn't bother to try and feel any sort of passion that she had when he first kissed her. It hadn't been that long ago, but everything had changed. She had changed. And now Hojou had changed too.

….But Hojou hadn't changed. Not really. Not naturally, the way people do over time. His change had been sudden, night and day. He'd hidden who he really was. That was troubling.

He deepened the kiss, pulling her in tighter. But now Kagome was pissed. Hojou had been lying to her this  _whole time_. When had he found out he was a slayer? Not as recent as Sango had, that was for sure. So how long had he been lying to her? When they started dating? Before that? Was it possible that he had known that first day of Freshman year when he helped her pick up her books from the floor?

A low growl registered somewhere in the back of her mind, and it broke her passive demeanor. She pushed against Hojou, trying to break free of his kiss, her anger consuming her guilt. How  _dare_  he keep something like this from her? How  _dare_ he hide who he really was?

Breaking free, she gasped, more from outrage than from lack of air, and opened her mouth to tell Hojou where he could shove it for lying to her.

But then, through the mirror, her eyes caught golden. They seethed with anger, that gold. They held her in place. Frozen. She knew Inuyasha felt betrayed, just like she felt betrayed. His gaze made her stomach drop, made her breath hitch, made her want to scream.

"I'm so glad you're okay." Hojou was saying over the sound of rushing water in her ears. "I'm glad I made it in time."

She couldn't bring herself to speak at the moment. Her body felt limp, her mind numb. She let Hojou pull her in for a hug. Her cheek against his chest, his arms wrapped around her, Kagome blocked out Sango's jab about getting a room and gazed into the mirror.

Inuyasha withdrew back into his prison.

Kagome felt sick to her stomach. She pushed away from Hojou and stood up, folding her arms over her chest as if it would protect her from his words. "Hojou, how long have you been a slayer?"

He tilted his head to the side and gazed up at her. "Why?"

"Did you just find out recently? Like Sango?"

He frowned. "A bit longer than that."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

He sighed, brushed invisible dirt off his pants and got off the floor, wincing and rolling his arm over a few times. "It's not like you would have believed me. I didn't want you to think I was crazy. I wanted you to like me."

Kagome blushed. Oh god. He was so sweet. "I did… I mean, I  _do_  like you."

He smiled. "Well, that' good. But there's another reason I didn't want you to find out." His smile became sheepish. "I didn't want you to be scared of what I am."

"I'm not scared," Kagome said without hesitation.

"No, you're not. But you've also been held hostage by a youkai. What I am must be tame for you at this point."

Kagome shot a heated gaze towards Sango, who put her hands up in the air in defense. "I only told him the truth, Kagome."

"I was never held hostage."

"He didn't stalk you girls? He didn't hunt you down and break into Sango's house and attack Kohaku?"

She opened her mouth to argue, then quickly snapped it shut. Inuyasha  _had_  done those things. In fact, she felt like she'd been running around in a panic since she had been locked inside that damn museum that first night. "You… you don't understand," she mumbled, trying to make sense of how she felt. Trying to explain that yes, he had done those things, but in a way… in a way, it wasn't as bad as all that.

She felt like a petulant child, being scolded by mommy and daddy. Her cheeks warmed.

For a moment, no one spoke. Kagome wished desperately for a hole to open up in the ground and to swallow her up. Anything to get away from Hojou and Sango's judgmental gaze. She tried hard not to curl into a ball on the kitchen floor and squeeze her eyes shut in embarrassment.

A warm hand pressed against her shoulder, and she looked into Hojou's kind eyes. He smiled. "Kagome, let's sit and talk about this for a few minutes. You need to eat something. Can we take this conversation into the family room?"

She nodded.

"Sango, can you take the mirror back upstairs?" Hojou asked.

Kagome turned to Sango. "No, Inuyasha should be here. He's involved in this too."

"Kagome, I think talking without the youkai is the best thing to do. You've been going through a lot recently. Let's sit down and talk about everything that's happened so far - just you, me and Sango. Then we can decide what to do next."

Kagome frowned, her eyes locking onto the mirror. She thought Inuyasha would have shown himself and argued his case - he was an in-charge kind of guy. But he was silent in his cage. She glanced up to Hojou and nodded, and with her consent, he gently guided Kagome out of the kitchen.

They sat on the sofa, she and Hojou, and he gently prodded the story out of her. Everything that happened, the fight with Hiromi and her friends, being locked in the closet and then escaping only to discover the actual existence of Inuyasha, her memory loss and rediscovery of Inuyasha. At some point, Sango joined them with a tray of steaming homemade ramen and filled in the blanks while Kagome ate.

She felt comfortable for the first time in a long while, surrounded by friends.

The morning had risen, only a few hours until noon. All three sat in silence, the whole story now out in the open, save for the one thing Kagome couldn't bring herself to admit.

The urges she had when she was around Inuyasha.

She was such a terrible person, but she just couldn't tell Hojou. Not yet.

The shame ate at her.

Sango, as any best friend would, kept her mouth shut about it too, but Kagome didn't miss the pointed, judging looks she threw her way.

"I'm… I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it sooner," Kagome apologized to Hojou, "but after I went back to the museum and my memory returned, it's been one big mess, and I didn't think you'd believe me."

"I understand." He said. He reached out and gave her hand a comforting squeeze. She must have made a face because he laughed. "No, really. I've been hunting Youkai for a long time now, I know what they're capable of. You're the victim here."

Sango nodded eagerly behind him. "And your family, Kagome… Where are they?"

The reminder was enough for her eyes to well up again. She blinked back her tears. "Kikyou has them." She admitted.

"Kikyou? The priestess?" Hojou asked.

"Yeah. Hold on a sec." Kagome stood and collected the note from the hallway, bringing it back to show the others. "She left a message for me. She said she's holding them hostage, that I have to bring Inuyasha to her or she's going to kill them."

"Oh, Kagome." Sango half-whispered, and reached out for her friend. Kagome let Sango take her up in her arms. "We'll help you get them back. We will." She assured.

Hojou's lips pressed together in a thin line, his eyes calculating. "It's not something we can ignore, Kagome. From what you've told me, this Kikyou woman isn't someone to mess with. I believe she'll kill your family if you don't bring Inuyasha to her."

Kagome nodded.

"So the choice is easy then," Hojou said, standing from the couch. He started to pace. "The youkai will be easy enough to transfer, he's wrapped up tight in that mirror by the spell. Kagome, you said you're the only one who can pull him out, correct?"

"Whoa, wait a second," Kagome said, pushing away from Sango's embrace and straightening up. She caught Hojou's eyes. "We haven't chosen anything. I haven't said I was going to turn him in."

"Kagome, why?" Came Sango's incredulous reply.

"Because it's not so black and white. It's not just my family that's in danger, Inuyasha is too."

"Kagome, he's a youkai, not a-"

"No, listen to me," she demanded, standing from her seat to get on even ground. "She makes him do things. Horrible things. Things you and I can't even imagine. I know that my family is in danger and I… I know that they would be safe if I turned Inuyasha in, but I…" She fought back the angry tears that threatened to overflow. "I'm no worse than Kikyou if I condemn Inuyasha to that fate. I will not be the one to murder him."

Hojou's face had turned to stone, and for a moment, Kagome swore he would fight her decision. But he surprised her. The corners of his mouth turned up. He laughed. "You know," he said, "I think I would be disappointed if you  _didn't_  feel that way about the situation," he admitted.

"Uh, really?"

"Yes. Your compassion is a big part of the reason I fell for you in the first place." He sighed and motioned for her to sit back down. "I don't personally think that Inuyasha is good, but  _you_  are good, and I will not force you to do something you strongly stand against."

Sango flopped back against the couch in a huff, arms folded across her chest. "What do we do then? It's either Inuyasha or Kagome's family, and from where I'm sitting, Kagome's family is who we should be focusing on here."

"Sango-"

"Kagome, no offense, but your family has never tried to kill me. I don't understand why you're protecting Inuyasha. He hasn't done anything but bring you pain. You have a witch after you now, and she's going to  _kill your family_."

"You don't think I know that? You don't think I'm not sick with worry? I'm terrified that I'm already too late and they're-"

"Ladies!" Hojou interrupted, placing himself physically between the two. "There's an easy way to solve this. Kagome, you've faced this Kikyou before, but you haven't faced her with Sango and me by your side. I think that instead of tricking her, our goal should be to take her out."

Kagome's eyes widened at the revelation. "Do you really think that the three of us can take her on?"

"I think so. I've been fighting for a long time Kagome, and Sango is well trained. I think with our help we can win."

"And Inuyasha?" Sango asked. Kagome had to bite her tongue.  _It's not Sango's fault she hates him. I'd hate him too if he attacked me like that._  She reminded herself.

"We'll take Inuyasha in, fake that we want to make the trade and attack."

"She might be expecting something like that."

Hojou shook his head. "I don't think so, Sango. She doesn't know we're hunters. I think it's our best chance." He glanced towards Kagome. "Agreed?"

Kagome gnawed on her lower lip. It was dangerous. A million different things could go wrong. But Hojou was right, and she knew it. It was the only chance they had where Kagome didn't feel like she was sending someone to their death. She had faced Kikyou once before and fought her off. And Hojou and Sango were much stronger than she was. The plan might work.

"Agreed." She said.

"Kagome, if this is going to work, we're going to have to make Inuyasha believe that we're actually trading him in. You need to know that before you fully agree."

She felt her face pale at Hojou's words. "Why? We should let him know what we're doing, he can help."

"I know you trust him, but Sango and I don't. And if Kikyou has known him for as long as you claim she has, he might unintentionally give us away. We need her to absolutely believe we're going in for the trade."

Her stomach rolled. He made sense. He kept making so much damn sense. She knew he was right and she hated him for it.

"Fine," she said, a bite to her voice.

"Kagome, you're making the right decision here," Sango assured her, a sad smile playing on the corner of her lips. " You know that Hojou cares about you, right? You know that I love you?"

She nodded and leaned over to give her best friend a hug. "I love you too, Sango."

Kagome would stick by her decision, because of her family, because of her friends, and because she yearned desperately for the life of normalcy that she once had. And it made the most sense. Attacking Kikyou was the only way to truly set her family free. It would keep them all safe from whatever sick game the priestess and youkai were pitting against each other.

And after Kikyou was defeated and Inuyasha was set free, she could go back to attending school and doing her homework and hanging out on the weekends.

She could forget about youkai and magic and hanyou.

 _And Inuyasha?_  A deep, aching part of her asked.  _Will you forget him too?_

She had to.

She had to.

 


	22. Betrayal

 

Inuyasha

Inuyasha sat in his prison; legs folded, back hunched. Elbow propped on his knee. He sat facing away from the glass. The fingers of his right hand tapped a rhythm on the floor in quick succession.

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

His glass cage was hidden away from the sunlight in the back of a closet, the clothing allowing only the brightest rays through. They cast the barest of shadows against the stone floor.

Inuyasha's vision swam in red.

His youkai was taking over, bit by agonizing bit. The urge to kill ran through him. He was charged; electricity coursed through his veins. The hair on the back of his neck stood on end. His fangs pricked at his tongue.

His fingers tapped against the floor.

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

The image of Kagome running to the hunter, the way she defended him…

The way she  _kissed_  him.

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

He focused on the tapping. On the rhythm. His breathing was steady but held heavy in his chest, tightening his insides.

He wanted to rip the hunter to shreds.

He fantasized about it. The blood. The screams. Kagome's pale, terrified face as she watched from the sideline.

And he would make her watch. It would serve the bitch right.

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

_tap-tap-tap-tap_

He let the visions consume him. He welcomed his youkai. The  _anger_  raging through him cleansed his soul of any lust he felt for the bitch.

**How could you expect anything different? She's Kikyou birthed again. They are one in the same.**

They were absolutely one in the same. What had he been thinking, trusting the bitch? Kikyou had been nice and convincing when he first met her too, and look how that had turned out.

 **Kill her** _ **.**_  His youkai seethed.

Keh. Kill her.

**Kill her.**

**Kill her.**

**Kill her.**  His youkai lusted, chanting in glee at the idea of Kagome's blood on his hands.  **But not yet. Not yet. Make her watch first, then kill her.**

Yes, kill her. Kill her. Kill….

Inuyasha's chest tightened. His breathing hitched in his throat. He felt sick.

 **But why?**  His youkai argued.  **Why do you fight to protect the bitch?**

He wasn't protecting her! He didn't give a damn what happened to her, she had chosen her side as soon as she kissed the hunter, chosen her side as soon as she'd let her stupid hunter boyfriend carry his cursed mirror up the stairs and placed him in the back of her closet.

She had chosen.

He didn't fucking care.

 **You care** _ **.**_  His youkai accused.  **You foolish bastard. What do you think they're talking about down there? You think they're discussing the best forest in which to set you free? You think they're fighting for you?**

No. He wasn't an idiot, he knew what they were doing. But still.

 **You** _ **are**_   **an idiot. A damned, foolish idiot.**

Shut up.

**Your pathetic nature will be the end of you. Kill her.**

Shut up.

**KILL HER.**

"SHUT UP!" He screamed, slamming his fists onto the rock over and over and over again. "Shut up, shut up, shut up!" The skin around his fist grew raw and peeled away, and still, he pounded. "Shut up! Shut up!"

He felt his youkai seep back into him, felt himself gain control. The visions of Kagome choking on her own blood sickened him, and he turned his head to vomit.

Only nothing came out.

 _Damn this cursed magic mirror,_  he thought, curling up into a ball at his side. His vision had returned to normal, his mind was his own again. And all that was left was the hurt and a sick stomach that he could not rid himself of.

He would still kill that damned hunter boyfriend of Kagome's, she could be sure of it. Doing it in front of her still sounded like a fantastic idea. But the wench herself….

Kagome herself….

If his Youkai turned out to be right, Inuyasha would just forget her. If she did end up turning him in, so be it. He had survived under Kikyou's control for centuries. What were a few more? The very fact that Kagome existed as Kikyou's doppelganger meant that there would be more down the road. He would eventually run into another, and he would seduce her to bring him out of the mirror, just as he had Kagome, and he would make it his sole mission to kill Kikyou.

He was so damned close this time. He'd gotten a little taste of freedom and got careless. As soon as Kagome let him out of the mirror he should have run off with her into this crazy modern era and kept her away from complications. Like  _friends_. If only she didn't have all her damn  _friends_.

Inuyasha curled tighter into a ball, hugging his knees to his chest. He looked at his hand. He wouldn't feel the pain he'd inflicted on himself until he stepped outside the mirror again. He wished the same could be said for the pain he felt on the inside.

He was so caught up feeling sorry for himself, he didn't hear the wench creep up on him. She was there suddenly, pushing the hanging garments aside, allowing light to flood into the cage.

Inuyasha felt his back stiffen. He couldn't help the automatic reaction. He fought to keep his emotions in control, despite being hidden inside the mirror. He would not let her see how much her actions affected him.

"Hey." Her voice floated towards him, soft and light. "You in there?"

What kind of fucking question was that?

"Sorry." She said, realizing the innuendo. "I meant can we talk?"

Inuyasha kept his mouth shut. If he ignored her she would go away at some point, right?

"Please, Inuyasha? I need to talk to you." She begged.

He felt the growl rumble up from deep inside his chest. "What?" He bit out.

"We… we've been talking downstairs, and -"

"I don't give a fuck what you and your slayer friends talk about, bitch. Leave me alone."

"Um…" He heard the hurt in her voice as she trailed off, and he could smell the sharp sting of salt in the air. She was crying.

He almost turned around to look at her. Almost.

"I want to tell you what we're doing because you deserve to know."

The sick feeling in his stomach swelled up again. He knew what she was going to say.

"We're taking you to Kikyou."

He fought to keep his youkai in check. It tore at his insides as her words rang in his ears.

"They're my family, Inuyasha. I have to save them." The smell of salt intensified. Big, fat, traitorous tears rolled down her cheeks.

He bit his tongue against the scream climbing up his throat. Blood pooled slowly inside his mouth. He swallowed it bit by bit, "Do what you want." He said. It was all he could do to keep it together. He didn't want to look at her.

"I just…" Her voice wobbled as she trailed off. "I'm looking for some understanding, I guess. Some… forgiveness?"

Ha. Hahahahaha. Forgiveness. She'd go to her grave in 90 years or so, although now he hoped sooner, deprived of his forgiveness. She could be damn sure about that. He would make damn sure of that.

"...Inuyasha?"

What the hell was she thinking? How dare she come to him begging for some sort of permission? What the hell did she expect him to say? It wasn't okay.  _It wasn't okay._

**Kill her.**

_Shut up!_  He snapped. He wrapped his arms around his torso and bent over his folded legs. He realized he was shivering. A shivering mess of anger and betrayal and  _fear_ , dammit. And fuck the stupid doppelganger priestess and her stupid youkai hunter friends. Fuck them for turning him into what he hated most.

Weakness.

He didn't realize she left until much later. He lay back on the cold, hard floor of his cell and stared up at the rocky ceiling. He tried to sleep as the filtered sunlight shifted slowly across his prison. When it stretched out to touch his skin he pulled away, back further into the darkness. Sleep eluded him. His mind replayed the decisions he'd made since first seducing Kagome into releasing him from the mirror.

Why? Looking back on it now, what had possessed him to act so brash? His confidence in controlling the situation was a facade. He had no control. The two women in his life he had been stupid enough to trust had the control, and he had given it to them without a fight.

His cage moved. Inuyasha sat up, resigned. He sat cross-legged, hidden from view as Hojou crouched into his line of sight. The youkai hunter had changed his clothes. He now wore some sort of futuristic body armor, all black and rough-textured. The smile on his face was soft and unassuming.

"Hey." He said.

Inuyasha bit back a growl. Fuck that guy.

"I know you're in there, youkai. Deadline is almost here, we've got about an hour and a half." He paused, waiting for a reply, then shrugged when none came. "Kagome wanted to come up and get you herself, but Sango and I convinced her that wasn't such a great idea. She seems to have some sort of  _weakness_  when it comes to you. Although," he chuckled, "I have every reason to believe those youkai powers have something to do with it." He shook his head. "I'll say this about that girl though. She's a sweetheart. And for a reason I can't seem to understand, she doesn't want you hurt."

Inuyasha tensed at his pause. He knew the slayer was trying to goad him into saying something. Bastard.

"I'll say it just once, youkai: If you touch her again, I will kill you. I'll do it elsewhere, away from Kagome. She'll never know, because I don't want her to be in pain, but I'll do it. And it will hurt." His smile never changed. It was like he was having a chat with a friend. He shrugged, then stood and picked up the mirror.

Inuyasha stared straight ahead while the interior of Kagome's house swung by; back and forth, back and forth, as Hojou carried him out of the bedroom and down the stairs. "Almost time now, Youkai," Hojou muttered under his breath, just loud enough for Inuyasha to hear.

He couldn't help himself. He strained his neck to look around the living room as Hojou set him down propped against the wall. Kagome was nowhere to be seen. He caught Sango shoot a look his way before schooling herself and focusing on packing her weaponry splayed out on the table.

"Just let me finish this and I'll be ready to go." She said, stuffing her gear into her bag.

"Take your time," Hojou said. "We'll be in enough of a rush to get out of there once we have Kagome's family."

She nodded, opened her mouth to say something before snapping it shut again. She glanced towards the mirror for a second time.

Inuyasha wasn't stupid. Kagome was in the room somewhere, out of his line of sight. But why were they keeping her from looking at him? What the hell did it matter at this point? She'd already shown her true self, the bitch.

"Let's go," Hojou said, and Inuyasha's cage moved again; outside of the house and into the front yard. His prison lit up, golden and warm. He closed his eyes.

No one spoke as they made their way down the steps and into the street. They walked on for a bit, the gentle sway of carrying the mirror an unfortunate mix with Inuyasha's already tumbling stomach. He opened his eyes again.

They were passing a field; wide open and green. Wildflowers sprinkled bright colors in patches. He watched the colors sway from his prison.

He felt it then: the panic. It tore at his insides. This would be the last time in a very, very long time that he would be able to see the sun again. Kikyou would probably have his mirror thrown into a deep, dark cave where no one could come to visit. He'd only be let out at night time. He'd never be able to feel the warmth on his skin again. This was it.

This was it.

"Kagome!  _Kagome!_ " The words tore from his throat before he could stop them. He tried to swallow them down, but it was too late, and fuck if he cared anymore. The knowledge that this would be it drove him mad.

"Inuyasha!" He heard her voice just out of his view. His cage rattled as he was set down, and Hojou bent over the glass, a pleasant smile on his face.

"Yes?" He asked.

"I ain't talkin' to you, bastard." Inuyasha snapped. He yelled for Kagome again, ignoring stupid Hojou's face.

"Inuyasha, what is it?" He heard her call, then grunting, the sounds of a struggle. Hojou sighed and stood up out of sight.

"I don't think this is a good idea, Kagome."

More grunting. "Sango, let go!" He heard her shout. Then she was in his view, hair tumbled and face red. Sango was next to her, trying to pull her away. "Ow, Sango, stop it!" She said, punching her friend in the arm. Sango huffed and rolled her eyes.

"Fine, but don't say I didn't warn you." She snapped.

Ignoring her, Kagome, reached out to grab at the edge of the mirror, gazing inside, searching for him.

He didn't dare show her his face. Did it show on his face? How broken he felt? How panic-stricken he'd become? He didn't want her to know. He didn't fucking want her to know she was his last hope.

"Are you in there?" Kagome asked. Her voice broke.

For a moment he didn't speak, just watched her face. She looked like she was in pain. She did. But it was an act, it had to be. She knew what she was doing to him. She knew what she was turning him into.

"Just…. take me to the field," he said. "I want to feel the sun. One last time before I go back."

For a moment she stilled, and seconds felt like hours. His plea was weak, and it made him weak. But he didn't care. He didn't fucking care. He just wanted one more moment. One more moment to bask.

Kagome nodded. She grabbed the mirror and tucked it under her arm. The world turned sideways for Inuyasha.

"What are you doing?" He heard the others ask.

"Just a sec!" She called over her shoulder, stepping into the field and making her way out until Inuyasha spoke.

"Here. Lay the mirror flat."

"Like that?" She did as he asked.

"Yeah. Give me a second."

She looked over the top again, and a tear dropped from her eye onto the glass. It shattered into a thousand pieces and spread across the smooth surface, magnifying the sun a thousand times.

"Can you show yourself?" She whispered.

Fuck, his chest hurt. Why was she torturing him so? Why did she pretend to care when she so very obviously didn't?

He didn't want to say her name again. He couldn't do it.

"Just… leave me be for two seconds," was all he managed.

She bit her bottom lip. Nodded.

Gone.

Inuyasha breathed in deep. He could almost smell the wildflowers he knew were sprinkled out around him. He closed his eyes against the sun, the light filtering through his lids, orange and beautiful. If he concentrated hard enough, he could almost feel the grass pressed up against his back, tickling his fingertips, his ears. Feel the wind sweep around him. Hear the sound of a million different creatures, all alive and free and going about their lives.

For just a moment his world was of his own, and he could lay in the meadow forever. For just a moment the horrifying tasks he'd soon be carrying out left him in peace.

For just a moment he was free.

 


	23. The Price of Vengeance

 

Sango

Sango watched from the edge of the field as Kagome made her way out through the overgrown patches of grass and wildflowers, Inuyasha's mirror tucked under her arm.

She was torn. In just hours, Sango's relationship in regards to her best friend had changed. No longer were they carefree and boy-obsessed. No longer did Sango feel like an equal. Now she felt worried for her friend. In a way one felt about losing a friendship to drugs, so Sango felt she was losing Kagome.

Inuyasha was her drug.

She didn't get it. She just didn't. The youkai was proven to be unstable and dangerous. He'd almost killed Kohaku. He'd almost killed Hojou. He'd almost killed her. So why was Kagome still fighting for him? Sango had tried desperately to keep her away from the mirror. She knew something like this would happen, dammit. She knew once Kagome communicated with Inuyasha she would break again.

She could be telling him their plan right now.

Sango lifted her hand to her neck; touched the bruise the youkai's clawed fingers left on her throat. It was still tender. Raw. She fought to suppress the anger that threatened to wash over her. It was as if Kagome didn't care about any of it. She didn't care about their friendship, and had she not agreed to the plan Hojou had laid out for her, she'd almost think Kagome didn't care about her family, either.

She watched Kagome stop and lay the mirror flat on the ground. What the hell was he making her do? Sango didn't want to say it out loud, but it was hard to trust Kagome at all now. She kept her eyes trained on her target. Just in case. ...Just in case.

"You think Kagome will hold it together?" Hojou asked, stepping up to her right.

Sango shrugged. "If you'd asked me three days ago, I would have said yes, no contest. Now though…." she trailed off, letting her words hang thick in the air.

"She's stubborn. I'll give her that."

When Sango looked up at him, he was smiling. "Hojou, how are you still so damn happy all the time?"

He thought about it for a moment. "I like to see the good in people. Kagome has been through a lot. Her mind isn't in the right place." He paused. His smile wavered a little. "That's why I hope I convinced her enough to keep quiet about what we're doing."

Sango frowned. "I don't like that we're lying to her."

"Me either. But it comes with being youkai hunters. We are what we are because we've been taught better. Youkai, even those with some human in them, are not good creatures. They ruin lives. They destroy people. The only reason they haven't taken control is due to people like you and me, Sango."

She listened. Nodded. Knew he was right.

"His sob story is good, though. He sure knows how to get Kagome to trust him." He added.

Sango agreed. "She's been falling for it since she first met him. I don't know what she sees in him."

"Magic."

She glanced up at him again. Magic. At this point, Kagome had completely changed. It made sense that the only way to explain her behavior was magic, and she hated the thought of her friend being controlled in such a way. She tried to concentrate on something, anything else. "The plan," she finally said, looking back to Kagome. She watched as she backed away from the mirror a few steps and sat down, looking up at the sky. "It's shaky."

"Can you think of anything else? Any other way to get Kagome to cooperate?"

Her stomach flipped. She felt treacherous. Kagome was never going to forgive her after today. Sango had to decide. Explain that she and Hojou were planning on actually turning him over to Kikyou and not taking him back, or keep her mouth shut and risk losing Kagome forever.

But Kagome's family…..

Sango was sure Kagome would forgive her over time. Being away from Inuyasha would clear her head, and having her family around, being surrounded by them… She would realize in time that it was right. That her family and friends are what matters. Not youkai.

Sango watched her friend as she gazed up at the sky. After a few minutes, Kagome stood and dusted away the dried grass clinging to her clothes. She picked up the mirror and made her way back. Sango felt her herself stiffen as she approached. Inuyasha was still in the mirror, which was a good sign. She hopped Kagome had kept her mouth shut.

Kagome reached them, her eyes red and wet. She kept her gaze down.

"Alright?" Hojou asked, extending a hand for her to take.

She smiled politely. It was not the normal, happy smile Sango had come to know over the years. "Yes." She said. She didn't take his hand.

Hojou reached over and took her hand in his, his smile genuine, ignoring her lack of accepting his gesture. Sango caught the barest hint of a falter in Kagome's smile. Just barely.

"Let's go." He said. Sango allowed him to take the lead, Kagome a few feet behind him. She stood back for a few seconds as they made their way down the street.

This was it. Now or never. She'd be damned if she let Inuyasha come back with them. He was either staying trapped in that mirror, out of Kagome's life forever, or he was dying today.

There would be no other option for the youkai.

.

.

The abandoned house rose above them, tall and sharp, the high noon sun beating down on the roof. Sango gripped onto her weapons, making sure they were ready to go at a moment's notice. She felt the familiar thrum of energy fill her veins as she prepared herself for what was coming.

"It's different," Kagome said.

A different house, she meant. Different from the one Kikyo's minion had whisked her away to the night before. It made sense to Sango that the priestess would not stay in the same abandoned building to do her dirty work. She was a smart lady, no matter how evil Kagome described her to be. "Everyone ready?" Sango asked. There was no use waiting around any longer. They would have to be inside quickly in order to make it in time to get Kagome's family back.

"Ready." Said Kagome. Her voice shook.

"Stay behind Hojou," Sango ordered, stepping forward to lead the way. They moved to the side of the house, pushing past an overgrown bush and peeking in through windows as they went. Nothing moved inside. It seemed truly deserted. They moved around the back of the house, stepping gingerly onto the porch. Hojou touched her arm as they reached the back door.

"What are you thinking?" He asked.

She was thinking a million different things, it was hard to separate her thoughts into something coherent. They could be walking right to their death, worse case scenario. They couldn't be sure Kagome's family was still alive. She was scared. Scared for herself, scared to leave her brother without a sister, scared of her parents, whom she'd just learned was out fighting youkai themselves. She felt like a mess, barely holding it together. And she was a little surprised Hojou or Kagome hadn't realized how messed up she really was on the inside.

"...Could be a trap." Was all she allowed herself to say.

"Does it matter?" Kagome asked. "We're here to get my family, right?"

Sango caught her friend's gaze.  _Don't let her see how angry you are. Don't let her know how terrified you are._  She nodded. "You're right. We either go in or go home. As I see it there's only one option." She watched Kagome breathe a visible sigh of relief and fought the urge to grab her by the shoulders and shake her and say:  _This isn't only about you, there are other people's lives that are now a complete mess. What about my family? What about me?_

She swallowed the words threatening to break free from her lips and reached out to check the doorknob.

It turned; clicked; opened.

She stepped inside.

The kitchen was more brown than white, although Sango guessed white had once been its' intended color. It was clear of any normal kitchenware, ones that implied the space was well-used. Only a few scattered items remained. A broken blender, chipped on the side, unplugged and grimy; a bent whisk on the stove, still splattered with grease. Sango scanned the room, watching for anything that could possibly be out of place. Nothing set her off, just a general sense of unease. And even that wasn't strange, as empty houses tended to creep her out anyway. Seeing nothing out of place, she waved her hand at Hojou. He slowly followed her in, hand still holding Kagome's, pulling her along, the mirror still tucked under her arm.

Sango moved with purpose. Every step she took was a careful test of pressure - her foot against the wooden surface. Her eyes took everything in. Every detail, every broken frame, every hole in the wall. She took in Hojou's breathing, calm and deep, Kagome's at rapid fire. Nothing else breathed. Nothing else moved.

Hallway clear. Family room clear. Front door locked. Slowly they made their way to the base of the stairs. Sango strained to see the top step, covered in darkness. She looked back at Hojou. "See anything?" She mouthed.

He gazed past her, took in the walls and banister. Shook his head. "Looks clear to me." He mouthed back. "Want me to lead?"

Yes. Yes, she wanted him to lead. She wanted to not be here altogether. She wanted to be back at home, watching cartoons or picking on Kohaku. But she was nothing if not stubborn. And for all the wrong choices Kagome was making, she was Sango's best friend. She loved her, and she loved her family. Were the situation flipped and it was Sango's family on the line, she liked to think Kagome would do the same for her.

The thought of her family needing Kagome's help made her smile, she couldn't help it. Especially knowing her family's true history.

Recharged, Sango moved forward, slowly taking one step at a time. A few creaked. Those she stepped over. The others took her cues from behind her. The upstairs hallway was dark, but light poured out in sharp lines through cracked doorways, three in total, with a fourth shut completely at the end of the hall. Excruciatingly slowly, she moved forward towards the first door. She slipped close to the wall, pressing her back against peeling paint and pulling out her wakizashi, the short-range sword feeling comfortable in her hands. She took a step. Another one. Used the tip of her foot to nudge the door open. Slowly…. Slowly….

They swept towards her face, too fast to see, black and terrifying. Sango gasped and shoved herself back towards the far wall, heard Kagome let out a shriek, sharp and short. She gripped her wakizashi, raising it to slash at her attacker.

The bats circled over her head, narrowly missing the walls, their wings beating a loud thump, thump, thump in the air. Sango took a deep breath, tried to calm the adrenaline her body released. Fuck. She was so stupid. She glanced over to Kagome. Her friend's eyes were wide, her pupils dilated. Hojou stood behind her, his arm wrapped around hers and his hand clamped over her mouth. He leaned down to whisper something into Kagome's ear. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Nodded. Hojou slowly released her. His eyes darted to Sango.

 _You okay?_  his pointed look asked, brows raised.

Sango fought the blush making its way up her neck. Fuck, fuck fuck. How embarrassing to be scared silly of some stupid bats. She nodded in reply. Hojou raised his hand and slowly pushed it down, a sign meant to take it slow and calm down before they continued. Sango took his advice.

There was a very good chance she'd just given them away. Not that it mattered. If this priestess was as powerful as the youkai said she was, she probably already knew they'd arrived.

Seconds later she was ready for round two. Hojou checked the first room again, signed that it was clear. He asked to take the lead, but Sango shook her head. She wouldn't embarrass herself again. Acting like she was dying over some bats. Fucking ridiculous.

She moved forward. Bathroom and second bedroom clear. No more creatures popped out at her. The last door loomed in front of them.

 _So cliche_ , Sango thought,  _of course they'd be behind the last door._  With one last glance at her friends, Sango stepped up and gripped the handle.

The door slowly, slowly creaked open.

Sango's eyes widened.

She stood in the center of the master bedroom, her bare feet lightly touching hardwood floor. The room was darkened by years of dust and grime caked onto the windows, but she was clearly visible; her skin almost glowing. Deep, black hair, fell to her ankles, perfectly straight and heavy, her eyes dark and piercing. There was a curve to her lips. Confidence.

The hair on Sango's neck stood on end. The priestess looked like a very well put together Kagome, but the warmth that her best friend always possessed was not there. This woman, this… thing, was cold and calculating. And she already scared the shit out of Sango.

"You've made a wise decision." The priestess said, in a voice that was Kagome but not. She smiled with a mouth that was Kagome's but wasn't. She raised a hand, her manicured nails long and softly pointed. "Do you have what I've come for?"

For what seemed forever, no one spoke. Sango opened her mouth. Closed it. What could she say that would help their situation? She wracked her brain to think of something, anything that could help. And came up empty.

So colored her surprised when Kagome stepped forward.

Sango watched her friend move in front of her, Inuyasha's mirror tucked under her arm, her knuckles white with her grip. "We have him." She said, her voice strong. Stronger than Sango would have thought. It hid the small trembles that started at her friend's knees and radiated down her legs.

"Give him to me." The priestess demanded.

Sango's grip tightened around her wakizashi. "Kagome's family first."

The priestess's eyes shifted her gaze piercing, pinning her in place. "Watch yourself, yokai hunter. This is no business of yours."

"Kagome's business is my business."

Her lips pulled back into a chilling smile. She took a step forward, focused on Sango. "Do not be a fool, little girl. You and I fight on the same side."

"I'm on Kagome's side." Sango insisted. She kept her breathing even like her father had taught her for so many years.  _Don't let them see your fear. Stay calm_.

"And yet my doppelganger is involved with youkai." She glanced Kagome's way and wrinkled her nose. "She's starting to smell of him. She's become too close to him. So close that she's willing to risk her family's life in order to protect him. The very creatures that you and yours fight against. The very creatures that would kill you without a second thought."

Sango held her ground. Though she couldn't help the nagging feeling in the back of her head that yes, Kagome was making a lot of unsafe choices, and yes, she did not trust the youkai her friend fought to protect. Hojou was right. Give Inuyasha to the priestess, let the bastard rot in her creepy hands.

"Enough," Kagome demanded. She placed the edge of the mirror on the floor, holding it out at arm's length, the reflective surface facing the priestess as if offering a sacrifice.

 _Little does she know…_  Sango thought.

"We've held our end of the bargain," she continued. "Now give me my family back."

The priestess tilted her chin up as if looking down at a group of petulant children. She raised her hand. Her thin, petite wrist twisted elegantly in the air before she snapped her fingers.

He appeared suddenly, out of nowhere, just as he had when Sango witnessed him snatch up Kagome in her room. Robes dark and rich purple, hair pulled back, bangs brushing along his brow; His skin was smooth and youthful, the corners of his mouth turned down slightly. He did not look at the priestess, his attention instead drawn to the others in the room. He surveyed the group, his eyes a deep, dark purple to match his clothing, framed by dark, full lashes. They fell on Sango.

She forgot to breathe.

Her mouth went dry. She couldn't help the quiver that ran through her, deep in her belly. His eyes locked her in place. They were old. Older than they should have been. And sad. Sango recognized a sorrow in his eyes she'd never quite seen before. And just as quick as he looked her way, the connection was ripped apart. His focus now on Kagome.

"Your wish?" He asked, his voice like velvet.

"I want her to beg, Miroku," The priestess said.

The monk stepped forward, eyes locked onto Kagome. "Beg, doppelganger," he said.

Sango watched Kagome open her mouth, eyes wide. She shut it. Opened it again. "I…" was all that came out.

"Do not make me ask you again. Beg Kikyou for your family's life, or I will have to extinguish your soul. Do you understand?" His voice was calm, Sango noted, but his words were violent.

"I…" Kagome said again. "I don't-"

"Enough." The monk answered. He lifted his hand, turned it palm out. It was covered, wrapped tight in an extension of his robe and connected to a gold ring, intricately engraved and snug on his middle finger. Prayer beads hung from the back of his hand. Slowly he lifted the beads.

Wind out of nowhere, kicking up aged dust and thrusting it into the air. Impossibly strong. Sango's hair ripped from her ponytail and whipped into her face. The wind surged stronger, twisting into a funnel and pulling Sango towards the monk. She pushed her feet into the ground and the soles of her shoes tore across the splintering wood. Panic surged up inside her. She brought her hands up to push her hair back from her face to look for something, anything to grab onto to keep her in place.

Kagome was between her and the monk. She had fallen onto her side, one arm wrapped possessively around the mirror, the other reaching out, hand groping at the wood. Dashes of blood stretched across the floor in the wake of her fingers, like a stylized Van Gogh painting. She looked up at Sango. Their eyes met.

Fear, unlike Sango had ever seen on her friend's face. They didn't know what the wind tunnel led to, but everything in Sango's body screamed it was death. And Kagome knew it too.

Then it was gone. Sango reared back, the forceful wind no longer present to keep her standing. The back of her head smacked onto wood, hard enough for lights to flash behind her eyes. Groaning, her head throbbing, she picked herself up onto her knees.

The monk stood his ground, his face stoic. The beads were wrapped around his hand again. "Do not make me say it again." He said.

Sango heard silence. Then, weakly: "P-please."

 _Kagome… No…._  She called out inside her head. She rolled onto her side, wincing at the throbbing pain that slammed inside her skull.

"P-please," Kagome continued. "My family. Please."

Sango tried to reach out, but the pain stunted her movements. A concussion. It had to be. She watched, her teeth grit together, trying to will herself past the pain. Kagome was still on her side, one arm wrapped around the mirror, the other still stretched out, fingertips raw, clutching at the ground.

"Give me my mirror." The priestess said.

Sango watched as Kagome's shaky hand released the mirror and pushed it towards the monk's feet. She sat up to push it forward again and, her knees bent under, bowed. Her forehead touched the floor, her hair falling forward to cover her face. "Please," she whispered. "My family."

Oh _hell_  no. Begging was one thing, but no way would Sango allow Kagome to go through such humiliation alone. She sat up, ignoring her head, and inched slowly towards her friend. She could see out of the corner of her eye that Hojou was doing the same.

Good.

If they could get to her, keep her between them… If they worked together they might be able to escape.

She reached out to Kagome, her hand resting on her friend's back. She felt the muscles under her clothes tense, then relax. She knew.

Sango gripped onto what she could of Kagome's clothes, ready to pull her back at a moment's notice.

The priestess bent down and retrieved the mirror. She held it up at arm's length, gazing deep into it. "Won't you show yourself, Inuyasha?"

Sango felt Kagome move under her grip. She gripped tighter. Hell no. Hojou reached them then, moving to Kagome's other side. His jaw clenched tight, Sango could see the muscle in his jaw twitch. He was in pain too. He bent down and whispered something to Kagome. She nodded her head.

"It's fine. You can pout if you want, hanyou. I can feel you in there." Silence from the other side. The corner of Kikyou's mouth turned up, cold and collected. "I'm so glad you're home." She continued, placing the mirror gently against the wall. "But before we take our leave, enjoy the show."

Sango readied herself to spring at any second as the priestess faced them again.

"Doppelganger, I've returned your family as they were. They are in their beds, peacefully asleep and unaware." She paused, and Sango glanced up to see a steely gaze, cool and emotionless. "I am no human-killer. I do not destroy my own. Since you have kept your part of the deal, I have kept mine." The smile that spread across her face was calculating. "I will not be erasing your memories, as it does not seem to work. However, let this gift of remembrance be a warning to you."

She took a step forward, towering over them. "Look at me, doppelganger," she demanded.

Kagome lifted her head. Her cheeks streaked wet, eyes wide and terrified.

"If you dare come for Inuyasha again, I will kill your family, and I will kill you. Do not make me into what I despise the most. Get out."

 _Now._  Sango shoved Kagome at Hojou, who wrapped her up in his arms and jumped back, putting distance between them and the priestess. Sango followed suit, pulling out her wakizashi and keeping Kagome out of Kikyou's line of sight. She backed up slowly, watching the monk out of the corner of her eye. If they could just get out of the room... If they could get down the stairs and out onto the street they might make it. Every movement mattered. Slow and steady. Eyes on the monk.

"No… NO!" Kagome cried.

Shit. Kagome knew. She'd figured what she and Hojou were doing.

Sango could hear the struggle behind her, and she focused all her efforts on keeping her eyes in front, keeping her sight on her enemies. "Kagome, stop it. Stay still!" Hojou's voice echoed in the room, desperation threading his words. "No, Kagome, stop!"

Slow motion. Sango heard the footsteps, light and fast. Kagome's heavy, sobbing breath as she ran past, her disheveled, wind-blown hair whipping behind her. Hojou's arm reached out, Sango could see it stretch across and grasp thin air.

"Miroku." Kikyou uttered.

She was ready.  _No fucking way, you bastard._  Sango lunged forward, throwing herself at Kagome. Her shoulder dug into her friend's ribs and she used her momentum to shove her out of the way.

The monk appeared where Kagome once stood, and Sango spun around him, grabbing the base of his ponytail in her hand. She gripped hard, pushed off the ground, flipped over him and caught the barest glimpse of his eyes, wide with surprise as she took him with her. The satisfaction ran deep.  _Got you, you fucker._  She thought, landing on her knees and throwing him onto the ground.

She heard the crack of his body hitting wood before she spun, eyes locked on the priestess. One asshole down, one bitch to go.

Sango could see that Hojou had caught up with Kagome. He struggled to keep her at bay without harming her. But he had her, and that was going to have to work. If Sango acted quickly enough she might be able to rid the earth of all three monsters. The monk, the priestess, and the youkai.

She ran, sword raised, ready to strike.

"ENOUGH." Kikyou's voice filled the room.

Sango stopped. Frozen. Her body paralyzed. She dared not move. The grip on her wakizashi faltered, and she felt it slip from her fingers. It clattered to the ground.

"Ko...ha...ku…" The words slipped from her mouth, barely a whisper.

Her brother had appeared out of thin air beside the priestess, dressed in his battle gear. He gazed straight ahead, not looking at anything, eyes dull and emotionless. And the priestess's hand, her vile, putrid, unearthly-pale hand lay gently on his shoulder.

"Kohaku!" Sango cried, taking a step towards him. The monk moved in front of her brother, raising his wrapped hand again, his threat clear. She hadn't even heard him get up.

"Please stay where you are." He said, his voice deep but polite, despite the throttling she'd just given him. Sango grit her teeth. The thought of him opening that hand again made her stomach drop. It would be over for them all if he decided to unwrap it completely.

"Leave my brother out of this!" She shouted at the priestess, visions of cutting her in two flashing behind her eyes. Her fist gripped thin air where her weapon had once been in her hand.

Kikyou smiled and wrapped an arm lazily around Kohaku's neck. "This is a consequence of your decision to protect Inuyasha, slayer." She said.

"I'm not protecting that asshole!" Her brother, he was innocent. And again, she'd gotten him caught up in this mess. What would she do without him? What would her parents do? They would never forgive her. She would never forgive herself. "Give him back to me, he's completely innocent!"

"He is not innocent by way of your actions." The priestess hissed.

"Kohaku, get away from her!" Sango cried, desperate for her words to reach him. She called out to him again. Again.

Nothing. Like a puppet he stood, face relaxed, gazing forward.

"I'm out of patience. You rogue youkai hunters have been nothing but a hindrance, traitors to our species. Miroku, kill them all and be done with it."

Sango didn't have a chance to react. The monk raised his staff and swung.

The training. The many, many years of training is what kept her movements quick and kept her on her feet. She ducked, moved back, only to have the staff hurling towards her again. Weave, duck, step back, back, back. He moved towards her, pushing her into a constant retreat. She moved again, turned to sprint around him. And she was falling, her feet in the air as his staff swept under her, knocking her down.

She heard Hojou behind her, and then he was on the Monk, a solid fist connecting to his jaw. They tumbled over Sango into a heap of sharp, jerking movements, each landing punches on the other.

Sango took her chance. Ignoring her bruised body, she pulled herself off the floor and ran straight for her brother. Her sword lay feet away from where he stood and she leaped for it, hand outreached, fingers desperate.

The monk was in front of her again, cutting off her access to her brother and weapon. She whipped her head up, the hatred for him seething inside her.

His eyes held fast onto hers. She couldn't look away. Dammit, why wouldn't she move?.

Her breath hitched.

Beautiful.

And he was. The only thing that ruined it was his obvious, ongoing intent to kill her.

"Fuck!" She said, jumping back as he reached out for her, shaking free from the daze in her head. She landed safely a few feet away, eyes locked on him. He was fast. Too fast. She didn't dare look away.

Where were the others? Where was Kagome? If they could just get to her brother. Just get him to safety… "Hojou!" She called, keeping her eyes on the monk.

He smiled.

Fuck him and his killer good looks.

"I'm here, I'll get him!" She heard Hojou call back. Then nothing.

"Hojou!" Sango called again. No answer.

Then Kagome screamed.

Something had gone horribly wrong. Where was Hojou?

It was only an instant. One microsecond of time. Sango couldn't stop it. Her eyes shifted to look for Kagome.

The monk was on her, wrapping his arms around her. He was strong, crushing her arms to her sides, her face to his chest. "Shhhh," He said, his voice a deep rumble. "Quiet now. Just let it flow through you. It will be over soon."

"Screw… you…" Sango said, her words mumbled together, she tried to struggle against him, but he had her, and she was losing strength. Her eyelids drooped. She fought to keep them open. What the hell was he doing to her? How-?

A sharp, burning pain in her back. A strange, foreign sensation of something pushing through her. She gasped. Turned her head. Her eyes widened.

He stood behind her, a few feet away. His hand wrapped around the heavy metal chain. No emotion on his face.

"Ko- Koha... ku….?" Sango's eyes followed the chain, It emerged from her brother's grip. Across the floor it lay, twisting in wide curves, closer and closer and closer until….

"Shit," the monk spoke softly, almost too low to hear over the rushing in her ears. The curse sounded strange, coming from his pretty, sculpted lips "Looks like the decision was made for me."

Sango's mind slowed to a crawl. Her thoughts became choppy, she couldn't make sense of them. What decision? Why…? Her brother…?

She coughed. Felt warm liquid covering her lips, her tongue. She choked on it.

Somewhere in the encroaching darkness, Kagome screamed again.

"Such a waste." She couldn't see the monk anymore, but his voice echoed in her ears. "To die so young."

.

.

Sango opened her eyes.

She was on her stomach, her head resting on the ground. It was wet and sticky. Her hair stuck to her face. She choked again. Coughed. Saw deep red liquid spray out around her.

And Hojou...

He lay in front of her, out cold; his head gashed open. She could see the bone of his skull through a thin layer of flesh. Blood dripped steadily over his brow, covering his eye and pooling around his cheek. She tried to move her arms to push herself up. Couldn't. She turned her neck, trying to see what was rendering her useless. She lifted her chin as high as she could, eyes straining.

"Kusarigama…" She breathed, tears pooling in her eyes. Her brother's demon bone kama rose from her back, her dark blood splattered against the stark white carved bone. Her jaw slackened as the realization hit her.

How could he?

How  _could_  he?

Movement to her right. It was Kagome, clothes torn, hair a mess, eyes wild, but alive. She moved fast, throwing herself across the room and onto the mirror. The priestess lunged, arms reaching out, wrapping around her throat. Kagome opened her mouth. Screamed.

A bright, white light exploded from where Kagome stood just moments before.

"No..." Sango whispered before the bright light washed over her.

Then nothing but darkness...

 


	24. Not Like This

 

Kagome

Wrong.

Wrong.

Everything was wrong.

Kagome felt it as soon as she stepped into the room. It was reinforced by the horrifying wind that tried to swallow her up, and confirmed by the realization that  _they meant to leave Inuyasha behind_.

No.

No.

It wasn't supposed to happen like this. They had a plan. They'd all agreed! Get in, fight Kikyou, get Inuyasha out and keep her family safe all in one go. But it wasn't happening that way. Hojou and Sango had other plans. It was obvious they meant to leave him behind, and all Kagome could think about was that Inuyasha would truly think she betrayed him.

The anger she felt towards her friends consumed her insides. Hojou would not let go, his grip like iron, his pleads to stay with him pushing her desperation even further. She managed to twist in his grip and land a sharp blow with her elbow to his jaw.

The lessened pressure was just enough for her to slip free.

She ran past Sango, her focus set on the mirror. She had to tell him. She had to explain. She had to save him.

A sharp pain her her side, and she slammed hard onto the floor. By the time she looked up to see what had hit her, Sango was tossing the monk over her head by his hair, her eyes wild and sharp.

Ignoring the throbbing in her side and the fact that Sango had shoved her so roughly, Kagome moved towards the mirror, but Hojou was on her again, picking her up with that ridiculous strength of his and pulling her back.

"No!" She cried, struggling to break free.

"Kagome, stop. Don't get yourself killed for him." It was an order, harsh and angry. Hojou's arms wrapped around her torso, her hands pinned, his fingers gripped tightly at her wrists.

"You betrayed me!" Kagome cried. "How could you lie to me? I  _trusted_ you!"

"Kagome, he doesn't care about you, he's using you. You're under a spell, you-"

"I promised him! I promised!"

"Kagome, please don't make me-"

Sango yelled, and Kagome whipped around to see her friend run straight at the priestess, sword raised in a graceful, powerful arch.

"ENOUGH," Kikyou demanded.

Time stopped. No one moved. Kagome felt Hojou inhale sharply behind her, gripping her tighter to him.

Sango's sword slipped from her grasp.

"Ko… ha… ku…" The words spilled from Sango's lips, breathless and raw.

No. No more. Kagome couldn't take anymore. Dread swept through her as Sango called out to her brother, as she screamed at the priestess to release him.

And the monk was on her again, his attacks swift and deadly.

"Shit." Hojou cursed. He pushed Kagome back, and she fell, frozen in place. She watched Hojou throw himself at the monk, knocking him down and rolling across the floor, trading punches.

Kagome watched, trapped within the world that slowly fell apart around her. Sango went for her weapon again, as the monk won against Hojou with another solid punch, causing him to stumble back, dazed. It was like the monk had a sixth sense, he could always tell when Sango went in for Kikyou. He was suddenly between them, too quick to see. He managed to catch her this time. Squeezed until her back arched in pain. She called out to Hojou, who took his chance and went to grab Kohaku himself.

Sango's brother raised his weapon.

"HOJOU!" Kagome screamed. But it was too late.

Too late.

Hojou body went stiff. He fell to the ground, his head split open like a grape, blood spattering in an arc against the ceiling and wall.

And before Kagome could move, Kohaku was behind his sister, taking aim.

The sharp bone pierced her body.

Kagome snapped out of her stupor. She would not watch her friends die as she stood by helpless.

She ran. If she could just get to Inuyasha. Just free him from the mirror.

Kikyou lunged for her, she could see her out of the corner of her eye.

Quicker than she thought it possible, Kagome pushed her body to move faster.

Her fingers wrapped around the mirror's frame and looked straight into it, ignoring the wide eyes and wild hair of her reflection. "Inuyasha!" She gasped. "Please! Save them!" She was desperate to help her friends. If she could just get him to show himself; if she could just kiss him his freedom one more time... Anything. She would do anything.

Kagome opened her mouth to tell him so. She would go with him on his hunt for the jewel shards, she would leave her family and friends and her life and go with him without a fight if he would save them. She-

She caught movement in the glass; pale arms and deep black hair. She spun, her back pressed up against the mirror as Kikyou reached her. The urge to vomit surfaced and Kagome's chest burned, a faintly familiar heat that started in the center of her breastbone and blossomed outwards, as if her insides were boiling. Kikyou's fingers wrapped around her throat. Squeezed.

"No… NO!" Kagome screamed, throwing her hands up and wrapping her fingers around Kikyou's wrists. Light burst from her hands, blinding her, engulfing the room. And Kagome knew she was doing it again. Purifying. The heat rushed from her body, like a volcano it poured from her skin.

The grip on her neck tightened. Kikyou's face pushed through the light, eyes wild and inhuman, hair tumbling behind her by the force of Kagome's purification.

Her flesh stayed pristine.

"You stupid, little copy," she spat, the roar of the purification light rushing around them. "Did you really think I wouldn't be prepared for this? You think you can fool me with your cheap tricks?" She pushed her face closer, filling up Kagome's vision. "You received these powers because you are my doppelganger.  _Do not think for a moment that you can defeat me_ ," she hissed.

Kagome couldn't breathe. Her mouth gaped open, desperately trying to suck air into her lungs.

And then she heard it, a growl in her ear. "Kagome… Let me out."

Kagome's world slowed to a crawl. Kikyou's cold hands wrapped around her throat, the purification like flames licking around her face and Inuyasha's voice in her ear. All she had to do was turn her head and press her lips to the glass and he would be free. But she couldn't move. Kikyou's fingers gripped her tight, held her in place.

"Kagome," his voice was louder this time, deeper. "Now, Kagome. Let me out now."

Her eyes widened. This was it. It was either get Inuyasha out or die. And she  _refused_  to die. She hadn't gone through everything, she hadn't dragged her best friend and boyfriend through hell just for her to let go at the end. They were down, but if she could get Inuyasha out, if he could just get them away from Kikyou and her monk, they might survive.

She raised her hand up and placed it over Kikyou's face, her palm pressing against her nose, her fingers spread out over her eyes. She felt it within her, the heat, still contained. There was more.

 _There was more_.

Kagome screamed.

It exploded from her, the heat expanding, like a grenade she released it from inside her, and she was screaming, screaming, screaming….

No.

Kikyou was.

The cold hands disappeared, and Kagome whipped around and smashed her lips against the glass, immediately cutting off the heat from within her.

 _Hurry, hurry, hurry, HURRY_! She screamed inside her head.

A different kind of heat this time, a searing against her lips as Inuyasha materialized from the mirror. Just like the other times, she felt it; a deep need, a pull towards him that she'd come to crave over such a short span of time. But this time… this time his kiss was different. It was inflexible, like iron.

And then he shoved her back. She fell on her backside, gaping up at him in shock.

He stood over her. A menacing grin spread across his face. His fangs, which Kagome had felt with her tongue many times before, had grown and were poking out over his bottom lip. His hair seemed thicker, as if the underside against his scalp stood on end, and his eyes…

His eyes….

A deep, crimson red had seeped over white, leaving his pupils swimming in blood.

He cracked his knuckles. Laughed. It was slow and thick, like molasses; a deep rumble from his chest.

"Fuck," he purred, "It's been a long time since I've felt like this." He stalked past Kagome, who stayed in her spot, awestruck at his change, and stopped as he neared Kikyou's side. She was sprawled out on her back, her arms spread, her legs awkward. Kagome couldn't see her face, but semi-translucent smoke sizzled up from where she could only guess it was. She watched as he nudged her with his foot. She groaned and rolled over. He chuckled and turned his head, his eyes peering gleefully at Kagome over his shoulder. "Gave the bitch a good one," he said. "She'll be weak for a while. It's now or never."

He raised his arm, his fingers outstretched, claws that had doubled in length were sharpened and ready to strike. His grin widened, his eyes hungry for his kill. Kagome didn't recognize him. He was different. Reckless. He was enjoying her pain. It made her stomach churn.

The dead air in the room instantly kicked up, pushing Kagome's hair up over her head. She felt her heart lurch up into her throat. Not again.

The monk had appeared between Inuyasha and Kikyou, and he kept the gaping wind tunnel in his hand mostly covered. Just enough whipped around Kagome to terrify her again.

Inuyasha stepped back against the pull, baring his teeth threateningly. "Fucking monk. You keep getting in my way."

The monk stood silent, his eyes locked on his target, his hand ready to release the full power of the wind. Kagome noted that he looked tired. Winded. A long scratch swept across his cheek, and an ugly bruise had blossomed blue and purple under his eye.

Pride flared up inside her at her best friend's abilities. Up against such a strong, otherworldly creature, she'd held her own. Hope blazed inside her. Inuyasha was out, and he would help them escape. Kagome would flee to safety with her family and forget about priestesses and magic. Sango and Hojou would survive.

Inuyasha gripped her arm, his claws pricking against her skin. She let out a whimper of surprise. He'd moved too fast for her to see. She tilted her head to look up at him.

Without warning he lifted her up and wrapped his arm around her torso, her arms and legs dangling free. "Hey!" She exclaimed, pushing against his leg. He ignored her though, grabbing his mirror while keeping his eyes on the monk and the fallen priestess.

"This isn't over, bastard." He growled.

Kagome kept silent, waiting patiently for him to pick up Sango and Hojou as well. She would not open her mouth and make things worse. Let Inuyasha take care of it. She tried to calm her beating heart. She just wanted out, away from the threat of the wind.

But then he stepped and turned in a way she'd felt him do so before. And she knew.

"NO!" She screamed as he whipped them around. Too fast.

She caught a glimpse of Sango and Hojou, still and bleeding on the floor.

Then they were gone.

.

.

"No, Inuyasha, my friends!  _My friends!_ " She cried as he jumped again, each flight taking them further away from the house where Sango and Hojou lay bleeding out. They'd been jumping for hours, with Kagome screaming and cursing his name, and the hanyou completely ignoring her.

Center City had turned to suburbia, suburbia into farmland, and farmland into forest. Kagome watched the landscape change below her as she screamed and tried to kick and struggle despite the heights Inuyasha jumped to.  _Maybe I want him to drop me_ , she thought between the insults she hurled at her captor.  _Maybe it would be easier to die._

His grip tightened around her waist, and she winced at the sharp pressure against her hipbone where his fingers dug in. She tried to struggle again, but his grip was tight. Tighter than Hojou's had been as he'd kept her away from the mirror. Tighter than Kikyou's had been around her neck.

Kagome was exhausted. Her face felt swollen and wet. It was like all the blood in her body had run to her head. Her nose clogged, her body sore, she almost felt like she were outside herself. A third party separate from the events. In pain but numb, terrified but too fatigued to care, she just wanted it over. When would it be over?

As if he read her mind, he landed. They stayed this time on solid ground.

Kagome opened her mouth to shout at him again, but he didn't give her a chance. He dropped her on the hard, cold, grass-covered earth. She grunted against the impact and sat up to rub at her hip, finding the energy from somewhere deep to scowl up at him. His back was to her, his mirror still at his side. His shoulders shook.

She stood and stepped towards him. She wanted to hit him, the  _stupid mutt_. She wanted to grip a handful of his hair and rip it out of his head. She wanted to kill him. She took another step, the rage inside her building. She felt…

The tears slipped from her lashes, covering her cheeks once again. She reached out towards him.

" _Stay Back."_  He spat at her, his ears twitching in her direction. His whole body tensed up. She could see the muscles in his back tighten. "Don't come near me."

She froze, taken aback. Before she could reply he jumped again, disappearing into the line of trees.

"Wh- what…?" Kagome said, her voice trembling as it left her lips.  _How could he leave me here?_  Her body started to quiver, the coldness of the evening as the sun set slowly somewhere behind her in the mountains. She wrapped her arms around herself and tried not to release the sob that was surging up, threatening to break free. She fell to her knees, the damp grass soaking into her jeans. Her skin broke out in goosebumps, and she knelt forward.

 _Don't cry again._  She instructed herself.  _Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry._  She sat in the clearing, one small person in a very, very large world. For the first time in her life, Kagome felt truly alone.

Time moved by unaware. It could have been minutes. It felt like hours.

Then she heard it: a crack. It echoed through the forest and out into the clearing. A giant flock of birds took to the air far off in the distance to her right, cawing and squawking, a bleak smear across the darkening sky. Another, loud cracking sound, like a giant tree breaking in two, and then more birds thrusting themselves into the sky. Another crack. Slowly, Kagome stood to her feet again. Inuyasha had left her to die? Fine. She wasn't going to wait around and give him the satisfaction.

She turned and peered into the black woods, the last of the sunlight disappearing behind the horizon.

 _I should have paid attention to survival in gym class,_ she thought. Should she stay in the clearing through the night, and chance her luck with whatever was crunching trees into oblivion? Or should she head into the cover of the forest? Blind but covered, and possibly get more lost than she already was?

Kagome had once thought herself grownup and mature. But now… She felt nothing more than a little girl. She was 5 years old again, lost in the supermarket and crying for her mother.

The indecision froze her in place. She wanted someone to make the decision for her. If Sango was here, she'd know what to do.

If Sango….

 _Sango._  The image of her friend, possibly dead and bleeding out onto the floor of the attic flashed into her mind. It didn't matter that she had Hojou had betrayed her, they didn't deserve such a gruesome death. It should have been her. It should have been.

She was on the brink of breaking down again. She was crumbling. A sob broke free.

And then he was there, at the edge of the trees, his white hair almost glowing in the darkness. He moved towards her, closer and closer, right up to her he walked, his eyes trained on her. His normal, golden eyes.

Kagome stepped back, angry. But she couldn't lie. She was a little relieved.

"Where did you go?" She asked, hating how timid her voice sounded.

The muscle in his jaw twitched. For a moment she didn't think he'd answer her.

"It… takes some time," he said, voice strained, "to get rid of my other half."

She wanted to ask about it, He had been so different before. But the words struggled to come. They stood in silence. Kagome could swear she heard her heart beating in her chest. It felt like it would thump out through her skin and flop onto the floor.

"You…" He finally said, his fists clenching and unclenching. "You  _betrayed_ me."

She tried to stop the sharp inhale signifying her surprise. Failed.

"Not only did you keep me trapped in that fucking cage," he continued, "but you left me in there. Kept me trapped. Just like Kikyou does."

"I-"

"Don't speak." He ordered, and she snapped her mouth shut. "I thought…" She watched him visibly struggle with himself. "I know we haven't known each other for very long, but… But I thought…."

She held her breath.

"I thought I could  _trust you_."

She opened her mouth.

"Don't. Speak." He growled. "I tried to tell you, Kagome. I  _tried_  to tell you that Kikyou would not harm your family. And  _still_  you fucking kept me shut up like an animal and handed me over to that  _bitch_."

Kagome shook her head. "No, it wasn't supposed to happen that way. We were supposed to take Kikyou down for good and bring you back with us! I honestly thought that Sango and Hojou would-"

"You can't  _take down Kikyou_ ," he sneered. "You think your pathetic, soft, human friends are a match? Your shitty friends  _hate_  me because I am hanyou. Because I am youkai! How many times will it take? How many times do you have to see them for what they really are for you to understand? They.  _Hate me_."

"They don't understand, they-"

"Don't fucking talk to me about understanding!" He roared. "I told you what Kikyou makes me do, what sick acts she makes me carry out, and still you-"

"My family!" She screamed, her arms wrapping around her belly in an attempt to rid the pain that sat there. "My family could have been killed! She was threatening to kill them! I was only doing what I thought was the best way for everyone to stay alive and safe!"

"And look at what's come of it! Your friend and boyfriend practically  _dead_. Your friends brother now one of Kikyou's slaves. Tell me again how fucking safe and alive everyone is. Tell me!"

Her mouth fell open to reply, but she choked on her words. She could barely make him out through the blur of the tears that kept falling, falling, falling. He was right, it was all her fault, thinking they would all come away scathe-free.

"That's right, you stupid girl, you have  _nothing_ ," he hissed. "You pissed everyone's life away for  _nothing_. Your family was never in any danger, Kagome. Most likely they were in their beds the whole time. Kikyou's magic is not is not small, she does things…" He trailed off, shook his head. "She does things you can't even imagine with her magic. But I know one thing for sure. She doesn't kill humans."

"How can you say that? She might have killed Sango and Hojou, and Sango's brother… That could easily have been Souta. So don't stand there and tell me that my fears for my family are for  _nothing_!"

"No, your family are weak. And Small. And Soft. They hold no purpose for Kikyou, she has nothing to gain by using them like she uses Miroku, or Kohaku, or like she uses  _me_. Your friends are not just human, Kagome, they are part of a world that you and your family know nothing about. Kohaku is of use. He's from hunter's blood. His family traces back to before I was born. Your silly little brother is not of use. Your brother is just that: Your brother."

"How- How  _dare_  you! If you think that-"

"Quiet." The voice was old. Tough. Shocked, Kagome jumped slightly, blown over by the fact that someone had snuck up on them; that there was another living soul this far out. She turned, eyes falling on a hunched form.

Her hair was silver-gray and tied back away from her face. The wrinkles in her skin ran deep; dark crevices giving away an age Kagome couldn't begin to guess. Yet despite the seasoned aura she gave off, her eyes shone bright and young.

"Inuyasha," She said, a frown carved permanently on her face.

Kagome's jaw dropped. "Uh…." She said smartly.

She was double shocked when Inuyasha replied.

"Kaedee."

 


	25. Reluctance

 

Inuyasha

She looked far older since Inuyasha had last seen her. Her eye, the one not covered with a patch, was still black and sharp and surrounded by deep crow's feet, spreading outward across her face. Deep gray hair sprouted from her thinning scalp. She'd gained weight in her old age and her back had succumbed partially to gravity.

Kaede hadn't changed otherwise.

He hadn't really dealt with her much after he was trapped in the mirror. For a while when Kikyou had first reappeared, she had followed her big sister around, trying desperately to take Kikyou back to her grave where she belonged. The last time Inuyasha had seen her, the two sisters had gotten into a fight, right here in this very spot, screaming bloody murder at each other. That was when Kikyou had done the unthinkable to Kaede. That's when she cursed her with an unbelievably long life, without the benefits of never-ending youth.

Unless she killed herself, Kaede wouldn't die before Kikyou re-passed on to the other side. And who knew how long that could take? Kikyou could be wandering the earth forever. And thus Kaede was doomed to the same fate; growing old while her sister stayed forever young.

"What brings you here?" Kaede asked, ancient voice cracked and dry. "And with…" she paused, taking Kagome in, weighing her. He knew what she was thinking. The similarities were uncanny, especially at first glance. "Who have you brought to see me?"

Inuyasha was still pissed the fuck off. His youkai had been screaming at him to both take Kagome - to make her his in the worst way possible - and to kill her. It was a war raging on inside him, and hell if he could tell which side was winning. He barely had the presence of mind to get the fuck away from her and destroy his surroundings instead of giving in and destroying her.

But even after he'd finally managed to get back to himself, the internal pain was still tight in his insides. It was just as intense as it felt when Kagome had first told him of her stupid plan. The plan that she'd actually fallen through with, the bitch.

He glanced at her, his eyes working far better than hers in the darkness. He could see she was struggling to get a good look at Kaede, mouth still gaped open like an idiot. The anger burned at his insides. He didn't think he'd be able to control himself if he didn't fucking need her for his own survival outside of the mirror. But he did. She was the only person other than Kikyou able to pull him free from the mirror, the only one who could lead him to the jewel shards. He needed her alive.

"Well?" Kaede asked.

"Looks familiar, doesn't she?" He said. He could hear the bitterness in his own voice.

"Aye, she does. For a moment I thought I'd gone back in time. For a moment I thought..." She trailed off.

"She's a doppelganger. A reincarnation."

"My  _name_ ," Kagome hissed at him, "is Kagome. I'm not a doppelganger. I'm just myself." She folded her arms. "And who are you? What are you doing this far out here? Where are we?"

That last bit was directed at him, he could tell. His ears involuntarily twitched towards her. But fuck if he was going to give her the satisfaction.

"I am Kaede, and you are in my backyard. I don't doubt that you are in trouble. I can think of no other reason for Inuyasha to be free of the mirror and without Kikyou." She paused. Shook her head. "You look just like her. I had no idea she was reincarnating. Alas, I guess it makes sense."

"I don't want to offend you, but please stop comparing me to Kikyou. I am not a doppelganger, I'm not a reincarnation, I'm just myself. I just… I just want-"

"Your friends," Kaede finished, "I heard. Both of you were screaming so loud I doubt a single creature in these woods were spared. Fear not, child, you are safe here. I can promise you that." She gave what Inuyasha guessed passed off as a smile.

"If you heard us, then you know what he's done." She pointed an accusatory finger in Inuyasha's direction. "He needs to go back for them or they will die."

"Keh, probably already dead," Inuyasha said, intending his words to hurt.

"You selfish jerk, you shut your mouth. Don't you dare say such a thing."

"I'm not going back for your shitty friends, Kagome. Deal with it."

"I  _hate_  you!" She seethed.

"Good, the feeling's fucking mutual." He spat back. "We're resting here tonight-"

"Oh-ho, are you now?" Kaede interjected.

"- _because it's the only place we can go without that stupid monk finding us_ ," he directed towards Kaede, "and tomorrow we're going after the shards."

"I will not!"

"You  _will_."

"If you think for even one second that I-" Kagome paused, eyes widening. "I…," she said.

He folded his arms, waiting begrudgingly for her to finish her thought.

"The shards…" She continued, then stepped closer to him, peering up through the darkness. He watched her eyes shift uncertainly, which meant she could barely make him out with her weak, human sight. "I will come with you to collect the shards."

He tried to conceal the surprise in his voice. "K-keh. Of course you will."

"But you have to go back and get my friends first. If you bring them here, I will go with you."

"Fuck no."

"Inuyasha-"

"It's not happening." He said. "You think I can't drag your ass around the woods and  _make_  you search for shards? Because I can. I have no problem doing it by force."

"You can try," she said, raising her hands. For a moment he thought she was grabbing for his ears, but she stopped halfway up, fingers outstretched. A grin spread across her face. "But I won't make it easy for you."

He felt the familiar crackle of purification energy from her fingertips. Inuyasha widened his eyes. She was struggling, he could see the perspiration spring up along her hairline, but the fact that she was even beginning to control her out-of-control priestess powers was impressive.

Fuck. That would be a problem. He could still do it… Take her by force to find the jewel shards. But he'd be lying if he said her purification energy wouldn't make the trip a million times more miserable for him. And if he'd come to learn anything about Kagome over the short span of time that he'd known her, it was that she was stubborn. Annoyingly stubborn.

 _Fuck_. He frowned, contemplating the pros and cons of accepting her demands. Her promise was tempting, but he hesitated. It wasn't just that the bastards deserved to bleed out and die in that house. That wasn't the only reason he was weary to go back for them.

_If they're dead, and I bring them back… What will it do to her?_

He knew the answer. It would destroy her. Yeah, he could bring her along with him then. She wouldn't put up a fight. But that was the problem. He wasn't sure she would be capable of anything after that.

Not that he should care about that. No, he shouldn't care about the bitch  _at all_.

"Inuyasha…" old Kaede crooned, "if the girl's companions are alive, even just a little bit…."

He stiffened. "Shut up." He snapped. "They're not alive, there's no point in bringing them back. It's just dead weight." He tried not to react to Kagome's flinch.

"You know we can save them if they've even got the smallest bit of breath inside them, hanyou." She scolded. "If you bring them to me, I can help you heal them. You know I can."

Kagome perked up. "Heal them? What are you talking about? Inuyasha, what is she talking about?"

"It's no use, wench. They're dead."

"Inuyasha!"

He could smell the salt in her tears, saw them rolling fresh down her cheeks, even in the dark. She reached out to him, gripped her fingers into his shirt.

"Please." She said. "I will go with you, I promise.  _I promise_. Even if they're dead… Even if… Just… Not there. Don't leave them in that house."

Shit. Shit, shit, shit.

 **Just knock her out and keep her tied up** , his youkai urged.

But he couldn't. She'd won.  _Goddammit._

He reached out and gripped onto her wrist, prying her fingers off of him. "Fine," he said, "but you'd better hold up your end of the deal. Kaede, take her inside, I'll be back in a few hours."

"Aye. Careful, Inuyasha. My sister may have laid a trap."

He scoffed. "Nah. This one here practically roasted her face off. She'll be hiding like a coward while she heals."

He watched Kaede's shocked expression with slight satisfaction.

"Really…" She said, interested.

"Just keep her inside. Don't let her wander off and ruin anything else." That'd just be his luck, losing her before freeing himself completely from Kikyou and her stupid mirror. It wasn't her actual being he was worried about. Nope.

Nope.

With that, he turned and jumped into the air. Wind rushed by his face. The earth grew smaller beneath him, and with it, the two women. Everything inside Inuyasha screamed that he was making a mistake. It was humiliating, going in to save the very humans that looked down on him like he were a caged animal. It was one thing keeping Kagome alive. Even though she'd betrayed him, even though she could no longer be trusted, she still…. Well, she was useful to him, that was all. The others were not. The others were just…. dead.

 **That's not all.**  His youkai chuckled.  **Don't lie to yourself.**

No. That was all.

**Just take the woman and be done with it. Get it out of your system. Make her yours. Dominate her. She will no longer go against your wishes.**

_Shut up._

The sooner he got to Kagome's friends and brought them back, the sooner he could get started on getting the shards and acquiring his freedom, and the sooner he could rid himself of her. He had no time to be thinking of anything else. Nothing else mattered.

.

.

He landed on the roof, as softly as possible. Dark had completely settled in. The house was silent. Slowly he eased himself off the side and peered through what used to be a window. Now it was a big, gaping hole with shards of glass protruding out sharply at all angles, thanks to the mixture Kagome's purification blasts and Miroku's wind tunnel.

His eyes scanned the torn room and fell on two figures, still lying where they had left them. Kikyou and Miroku were long gone. He brought his leg up to kick at the glass, and it tinkered lightly against the wooden floor. He swung himself inside; landed gently.

They weren't moving. He couldn't even see the small expansion and compression of their chest that would signify breathing. The air smelled thick and metallic, their blood had long since seeped permanently into the wood. He moved closer, reached out, touched Sango's neck.

 _Shit_ , he thought. He didn't know what he'd been hoping for, that he'd find them alive or find them dead. His top choice would have been to leave them and forget about them. He dropped an ear to her chest, straining to hear a sign that there was still something inside her that hadn't been extinguished yet.

He moved towards Hojou and went through the same motions. Finally, a heavy sigh escaping his lips, he stood and collected both of them in his arms. They were gross. Sticky and dirty. Faces ashen and lips tinged blue. He wrinkled his nose against the smell. The stench of all that blood made his stomach churn.

Kagome was not going to like what she saw.

They wouldn't fit out the window, and shifting was out of the question as Miroku was too damn good at detecting and tracing the faint bit of magic it left behind, so Inuyasha carried them the long way out. Down the stairs and out the front door. He got to the middle of the street before he jumped. It was going to take much longer to get back to Kaede's than it had before. He'd be lucky if he made it by daybreak.

 _Ha!_  He thought. Wouldn't that just be fantastic? He imagined the first light touching his skin before disappearing mid-jump, and the reaction on people's faces as two bloody, beaten bodies fell from the sky and splattered on the street.

Kagome would be so pleased.

Despite the weight of his enemies, Inuyasha made it with a half-hour of darkness to spare and laid the bodies onto the grass. Kagome came running towards him as he straightened up, rubbing his sore back. It fucking hurt.

"Oh no," she cried, devastated. She fell to her knees by Sango's side and positioned her friend's head in her lap. "No, no, no."

Inuyasha flattened his ears against her sobs. They were gut-wrenching and sorrowful. The urge to reach out and gather her in his arms, to kiss her pain away was almost overwhelming. He struggled to push it down.  _Don't let your feelings fool you, idiot_ , he berated himself.

She had hunched over her friend's body, an ear to her blood-stained chest. "She's not breathing. I can't hear anything," she wailed. "Sango… Sango…"

Kaede came up behind her and gently laid her hands on her shoulders. "Kagome, dear. Let me tend to your friends. Do not lose hope yet."

Kagome lifted her head and looked into the old woman's eyes. "What do you mean? They're gone. Look at them! She's…. Sango, she's…. She's cold."

"Aye, I see that child. But don't let your human eyes and ears fool you. There is no simply alive and dead, there are many layers in between. Let me tend to them and we will know for sure. Come now." She gently pulled Kagome away from her friend and sat her back to watch. Then Kaede kneeled down beside the hunter herself.

Inuyasha observed with his arms folded, dejected. He knew what the answer would be. For an instant, he considered not letting Kaede near the bodies, of pushing her back and yanking Kagome up and leaving. But the urge passed quickly. And so he stood, fuming, and watched as the old woman kneeled down and placed a hand against Sango's forehead, and one on her chest, right between her breasts. She breathed in deeply, and after a few seconds let it out in one big woosh. Then she stood and did the same with Hojou's lifeless form.

Finally, she turned to Kagome, who had nervously tangled her hands in her own shirt

"They are close. But they can be brought back."

Inuyasha grit his teeth as Kagome cried in surprise, relief the cause of her fresh tears. Great. He'd hoped that Kaede wouldn't be able to tell what he had come to find back in the house. He had hoped to bury and be done with them.

"Don't let my words fool you," Kaede chided softly. "It will take many hours to heal them so they are not on the brink of death. Inuyasha and I will have to work around the clock, and it could take days. A week, possibly. And that's just the first part. It could take weeks, months even, for them to wake up. More time to gain movement as freely as they used to. They may not be themselves when they come to. The experience of being so close to death drives some to madness." She cracked a small smile at Kagome's eager nod. "But yes, I do believe we got to them in time." She turned then to Inuyasha. He couldn't help glaring daggers.

"You know what must be done." She said.

Inuyasha growled. "I know what I  _can_  do, but what I  _will_  do is another story, wench."

"Inuyasha…" He winced at Kagome's voice. "I promise you. I promise. Bring them back and we will leave as soon as you're finished. I won't wait for them to open their eyes, we will go looking for the shards, just…  _please_."

He didn't like it. He didn't like it one bit. Both the fact that he was helping her friends and that he seemed unable to steel himself against Kagome. The blood rushing through him was hot and heavy. He felt thick when she spoke to him, and forget about her pleading to him, that just reinforced an unusual drive to give in to everything she asked for. He just couldn't seem to ignore her, couldn't bring himself to go against her requests. And he fucking hated it. He hated it.

He pointed a clawed finger at her. "If you are lying to me, Kagome, so help me I will not think twice about undoing what I am about to do."

Her rapid nods would have to do for agreement. The sickness in his stomach churned again. He turned to Kaede. "Darken a room to keep the sun out. It won't do us any good if sunlight touches me and I'm thrust back into the mirror while I'm working."

Kaede nodded. "You'll start us off then?"

"Keh," he said, bending down and swinging Hojou up over his shoulder, "it only makes sense. I've seeped up more magic over the years due to that fucking mirror. I want to get this done and over with as soon as possible. We're wasting time here." With that, he turned and walked towards Kaede's cabin, knowing the way by heart, even after all this time. He left the women to pick up and carry Sango themselves.

This was it. This was the end of nice deeds and being played with when it came to the wench. Inuyasha knew full well that bringing Kagome's friends back to life meant they could hunt him down and try to rid the earth of him again in the future, and it pissed him off that Kagome was so blinded as to not see such an outcome. She was so frustratingly optimistic.

The walk from the clearing to Kaede's cabin was less than a few minute's time, and Inuyasha whistled low when he came across it. Originally it had been a hut; a single room with a smokestack. Then it was a two-roomed cabin and the smokestack had significantly improved. Now it was modern and large, a one-story wide building made from sturdy wood. The smokestack was taller than before, and three times the width. There had to at least be eight rooms, he guessed.

The others caught up to him, and Kaede led the way up the stairs and through the front door. Inside it was tidy. Spotless, almost. He followed her down the hallway and into a back room. It was circular and bare of any furniture. She and Kagome laid Sango on the floor, then she moved around, collecting towels and clothing to hang over the already drawn-down curtains, effectively cutting out the natural light. She flipped a switch by the door and turned the artificial lights off. Inuyasha dropped Hojou next to Sango, then turned to Kagome. Without speaking, he reached out and grabbed her arm, ignoring her cry of surprise, and lead her out of the room.

"What are you doing?" She struggled in vain against his grip until he pushed her out the door.

"You stay out of this room," he said. "Do not interrupt us in here. The magic is draining, so Kaede and I will be taking turns. Do not wander out on your own. If you try to run away I will catch you and bring you back and I won't be nice about it."

Kagome glared up at him, and he couldn't help but admire the way she stood firm, how she didn't flinch away from his threat. Her eyebrows drawn, her jaw tight, she nodded. "I'm not going anywhere." She said.

"Whatever you say," he sneered as Kaede walked out behind him. He watched her guide Kagome down the hallway and into the kitchen, then slammed the door closed and flipped off the lights in the room.

He turned to the two bodies, fighting the youkai in his head, who wanted nothing more than to let them just pass on.

**You could tell them you were unsuccessful. That it took too much. They would never know.**

True, he could. He could, but…

Kagome's crying face, her hunched shoulders and devastating sobs… Why did it affect him so much? He tried so damn hard to keep it separate, his lust from any feelings. The betrayal still stung, but now, here, in the dark as he replayed the day's events in his head…

He'd been watching the whole thing from behind the glass. He'd seen Kagome's face as she desperately tried to get to his mirror. Seen the way Hojou and Sango had fallen.

He couldn't get Kagome's wild eyes out of his mind. Her face, pleading for him to show himself, would not leave his head. He saw it every time he closed his eyes. He saw it now. Here. In the dark.

He could do it. Just let them die. Even the simple thought, the 'what if' in his head made his youkai ecstatic.

But her face stopped him. And he couldn't. He  _couldn't._

 **You fool** , his youkai seethed.

 _Yes,_  he growled to himself.  _I am a fool._

 


	26. Resurgence

 

Kagome

_Her world swayed under her body._

_It was a gentle lapping, a rising and falling. Kagome was on her back. She could feel sturdy wood underneath her. She opened her eyes to a crystal clear sky. It was wide and deep, not a single cloud present. It filled up her vision._

_She had been sleeping for a while now, the warm sun beating on her skin. She didn't remember falling asleep, but she had to have been out for a while now, as her nose felt dry and tight, signifying the onset of a sunburn._

_Kagome reached out and gripped the sides of the small rowboat, hoisting herself up into a seated position. She looked around for her sunscreen. She should have brought it with her, she would have never fallen asleep under the sun without it. She looked around, under her feet, shifting her weight to see if it was under her body._

_But there was nothing. No bag, no towel, no sunscreen. She realized then that she was wearing jeans and a T-shirt, not her swimsuit like she normally would have._

How strange…  _she thought, gripping her shirt into her hands and peeking under the collar, only to find a bra instead of a two-piece top._ What the heck was I thinking?  _Coming to the conclusion that she was losing her mind, Kagome sighed and lifted her head to figure out where she'd drifted to._

_She was far out in the middle of a gigantic lake. High mountains rose up every which way in the distance. The water underneath her was flat, like glass. She hadn't realized the boat had stopped its gentle rocking. Now it was still. Everything was still._

_Kagome gripped one side of the boat and leaned slowly over the edge, cautious not to tip herself over. The water was a deep, royal blue color that only allowed her to see so far down. It was beautiful, and she wanted to touch it._

_She reached out and dipped her fingers into the water. It was cool and wet, and she pulled her hand up to wipe some of the liquid on her sunburnt nose._

_Her fingers came up covered in blood._

Oh god, what the hell?  _She thought, staring at her fingers. She leaned over the side of the boat again, peering deep into the water. It was the same brilliantly dark blue color, nothing like the thick, sticky red that stuck to her hand._

_She gazed deeper, looking for where the substance had come from. Her nose inches from the flat surface._

_Then she saw it._

_Hojou's face materialized from below, rising slowly, slowly, slowly towards the surface. His face was pale, his lips blue, perfectly preserved save for the blood seeping out into the water from the split in his scalp. Kagome reached out a trembling hand to touch him. She wanted to pull him up out of the water, take him back to land and bury him properly. He came closer, just below the surface. Her fingertips brushed across his skin._

_He opened his eyes. They were filled with blood._

_Kagome reared back into the boat, the blood-water mixture splashing up, wet and sticky against her face. She watched, horrified, as Hojou's pale, water-wrinkled fingers reached up and gripped onto the side of the boat, pulling himself up, pushing the edge down._

_Kagome opened her mouth to scream, but his hand clamped down on hers as water quickly rushed in, soaking her clothes. She could feel now, how the blood thickened the water as it swallowed her legs below the surface. She smelled Hojou's rotting flesh as he pressed it up against her face, stifling her screams._

" _Don't leave me..." his open mouth said. It was missing a tongue, the word gargling in his throat as water poured out past his lips. "Kagome… Don't leave me…" He was staring at her. She could tell, even through the blood that swam where his eyes should have been. Red trails pathed their way down his cheeks._

_He was staring at her._

_She screamed into his hand._

_She screamed._

She screamed.

The hand was over her mouth, wrinkled but dry against her lips. "Hush, child." Kaede whispered as Kagome's screams trailed off into heavy breathing. "It's okay, you're safe."

Kagome could feel her heart pounding wildly in her chest. She was coated in sweat. Her bedclothes stuck to her body. She was uncomfortably hot yet freezing cold on the inside. She shivered.

Kade removed her hand and picked up a mug that had been sitting on the nightstand. She offered it to Kagome, going so far as to picking up her hand and wrapping her fingers around the mug for her.

It was warm against her palms and fingers.

"Drink," the old woman ordered.

Kagome obeyed, taking big, long swallows of the soothing liquid. She felt it slowly warm her insides, felt it calm her nerves. It tasted like honeysuckle and lavender and… what she could only describe as gold. It was a taste she'd never experienced before. She looked up at Kaede who was still perched on the side of the bed. "What is this?" She asked.

"It's a home remedy. A special tea to help calm your soul. I haven't heard your story yet, but you've been through some trauma. That much is obvious. If you drink this daily, your dreams will soon disappear."

"Does it have medicine in it?"

Kaede smiled. "You could say so." She moved from the side of the bed and placed a new set of clothes on the covers. "Get dressed. After breakfast I will take you to the woods again."

"How's…" Kagome started as Kaede made her way from the room. The old woman paused just inside the doorway, her chin turned over her shoulder.

"Inuyasha is fine, it is his turn again today. No more questions. Come eat."

Kagome looked down at the tea in her hands as Kaede made her exit. She could feel her nightmare beginning to fade, like most dreams do. She gulped down the rest of the liquid, then stood and headed to the bathroom with her fresh change of clothes.

The hot, steaming water was a godsend. She stood under the shower head, just letting the jets relax her muscles. Today was day three since she and Inuyasha arrived at Kaede's forest. The first morning had been strange, but relaxing compared to what had become Kagome's life over the last couple weeks. Kaede had made her a traditional breakfast. The old woman didn't ask anything about what happened to her and her friends, which was fine with Kagome. She didn't want to talk about it.

Kaede kept her busy though, taking her out into the meadow and picking herbs, helping with the laundry, doing normal everyday tasks. Kagome was more than happy to assist. Anything to get her mind off of Sango and Hojou. Anything to get her mind off of what Inuyasha was doing in that room.

On the second day, when Kaede had announced it was her turn to take over and disappeared inside the room, Kagome had expected Inuyasha to emerge. She sat in the tidy, sparse living room, staring at the dark screen of a 50's style television covered in dust. She wasn't sure if it had ever been turned on. Kaede didn't seem like the type to watch T.V.

An hour passed. Then another. By hour four, Kagome got tired of sitting still, and instead headed outside to look for the same herbs Kaede had taught her about the day before. It was more difficult than Kagome thought it would be. It was hard for her to concentrate. Without Kaede's constant chatter about idle topics to distract her, her mind conjured up constant images of her friend's bodies split open, their blood splattered stark against the light walls. The feeling of Kikyou's hands around her neck. Of her contorted face, filled with terrifying hatred.

She angrily wiped the tears away from her eyes and started ripping out some of the herbs she thought might match the ones Kaede had pointed out the other day. She stared at the roots in her hands.

She broke down. In the meadow, on the dirt, a weed in her hand, Kagome sobbed, her sorrow echoing out through the forest.

Inuyasha never came out that day. And as the sky darkened, Kagome finally headed back inside, having nothing else to do but climb into bed and close her eyes. Then came the dream of Hojou.

Kagome was relieved that Kaede was out of the room again. Now at day three, she had lots of questions for the old woman. Maybe they would be done with the healing soon? Maybe she would be able to go in and visit? Kagome washed quickly, dried off, and changed into her fresh clothing. She wrapped her hair up in a towel and headed out towards the kitchen.

Breakfast was waiting for her at the counter, and she sat down at her place just as Kaede started to pour her some tea. Kagome leaned down to sniff it. "Ah, it's the same as before," she noted, thanking her before taking another sip and wondering again at the incredible, new taste on her tongue.

"Are you feeling better?" Kaede asked.

"Yes, thank you," she replied politely. She paused, biting her lip before collecting her courage. "How… how are my friends?" Her voice sounded weaker than she would have liked. She was hoping to sound aloof.

Kaede hesitated slightly, she saw it as she put the tea away, before ambling over and smiling. "No change, I'm afraid." She must have noticed Kagome's dejected look, because she reached out and patted gently at her hand. "Now, now dear, don't give up. No change is good. It means they are still alive. Do not worry about them until the week's end."

Kagome pouted. "I was hoping it wouldn't take so long," she admitted.

"Aye, we all hope the same. After my session yesterday, I do believe a week will be the least amount of time until we know for sure."

She nodded and started in on her breakfast. "How about Inuyasha?" She asked over a mouthful of eggs. "He didn't come out yesterday."

Kaede chucked. "Don't expect him to come out at all. He's stubborn, that one. He won't face you until the weeks' end is my guess."

"Why not? He can't possibly blame himself, he-"

The old woman held up a hand to interrupt. "Let's not discuss such things right now, child," she said. "Finish up and let's get outside. We won't be picking herbs today. Today I have something different planned."

She tried not to let her disappointment show. Kaede was being very generous, and it wouldn't be right to go against her wishes. She was nervous without Inuyasha, however, and it didn't sit well with her that she was not able to go into the room.

Still, she finished the last of her breakfast as instructed, swallowing it down with the last of the tea, and followed Kaede back into the living room, where the old woman picked up a dusty bow and quiver set that sat in the far corner. It too, like the television, was covered in dust. "Come now," she said, ambling towards the front door.

Kagome followed, silent. The weapon confused her. Kaede sure didn't look like she hunted. She looked like she could barely pick up a rock, but if Kagome had learned anything since this all began, it was that you should never assume a book by it's cover.

The thought brought back flashes of Hojou. Flirting, dates, holding hands, kissing… How different he looked as he faced down Inuyasha, trading punches, moving faster than she'd ever seen him move before. She hadn't known he could make such a face, full of concentration and quick thought. How unbelievably strong he was as he held her back from Inuyasha's mirror.

The tears sprang up again, and she tried to choke them down as she trailed along behind Kaede. She didn't want to think about what happened in that room anymore. The thought that both Hojou and Sango may have lived their last moments fighting for their lives because of  _her_ … It was too much to bare. So she choked it back, all of it, as they walked out into the forest, where the old woman turned to her once they reached the meadow and lifted the bow up for her to take.

Puzzled, Kagome reached out and accepted the bow. It felt awkward in her hands. She watched as Kaede walked towards the edge of the forest, maybe five feet from where she stood, and hung a target on the rough bark of the closest tree. Then she turned to Kagome.

"Our goal for the rest of your stay here is to get you somewhat proficient at protecting yourself. The journey you and Inuyasha will embark on is not an easy one, and it is far from safe. Kikyou and her minions being on your trail will not be your only worry." She gently patted the tree. "You will spend the morning attempting to hit this target. You must shoot at least one hundred arrows before lunch."

Kagome tried to keep her jaw from dropping. Failed. One hundred? What was the old woman thinking? She watched, eyes wide, as Kaede ambled up to her and picked up an arrow, holding it up for her to see. She pointed towards the end, where four white feathers spread out. "This slit in the wood allows you to load an arrow. Place it snugly on the string, where the nock is. Pull it back, aim and release. The old woman smiled at Kagome's stupor before moving past her towards the house. "Uh.." Kagome managed to say smartly.

Kaede turned her head, a single brow raised. "Aye?" She asked.

"One… One hundred?" Kagome repeated.

"Aye, one hundred. We need to get some muscle memory into your arms. Strengthen you up."

Kagome shook her head in disbelief. "Why not a sword? Or a gun?" She shivered, remembering how using a gun against Inuyasha had fared for her and Sango. Okay, maybe not a gun.

Kaede flashed an amused smile her way. "I'm afraid the bow is the only weapon I know anything about." She said, turning again and heading towards the house. Kagome watched her go until she closed the front door behind her.

Kagome looked down at the bow in her hands. It was heavy, made from solid wood, the center wrapped with strips of what was once probably white cloth, but was now an aged yellow color. The string that ran from one end to the other was taught and sturdy. She gently plucked at the string. It barely gave.

She pondered what would happen if she left the bow and went back inside and refused. Twenty shots she could understand. Thirty, maybe. But one hundred? She frowned. Wouldn't it be better to learn healing herbs, like Kaede seemed so well versed in? Kagome was far from athletic. She'd never been into sports or martial arts like Sango. She preferred hanging out at the arcade or shopping at the mall or karaoking with friends. And her studies. She was way more studious than she was brawny.

But…. She bit at her bottom lip. But she wasn't in any place to choose, was she? She felt her teenage stubbornness at war with who she'd become over the past few days. She wasn't any older than when she'd first met Inuyasha. She was still a seventeen year old girl who, other than losing her father, hadn't truly known any hardship. But she felt different. She felt… older, somehow. And before, where she'd have originally been flippant about such things as learning the bow, she couldn't help but be ashamed by her immature impulse.

Because even now, after coming across the dangers of magic, of learning of her past, after being chased and attacked by Kikyou and those that followed her… After realizing Sango and Hojou's true selves, after her fear and deep-seeded need for Inuyasha all wrapped up within each other… After all that, she was still the one to come away unscathed. At least, less scathed than the others.  _She_  was not the one currently on the brink of death.  _Her_  brother was not the one possessed by an evil priestess. How could she possibly go inside and refuse Kaede's wish? How could she possibly act so childish?

Her grip tightened on the bow. One hundred? Fine. She would shoot one hundred arrows by lunch, no problem. It was nothing compared to what she'd been told of Sango's rigorous training. One hundred arrows was nothing compared to facing off with Kikyou.

One hundred arrows was nothing.

Kagome reached down to the quiver and pulled out a single arrow. The tip was made of carved stone, or… on closer look, bone, maybe? The end was notched and decorated with simple white feathers. She glanced up at her target before nocking her arrow.

Or trying, anyway.

She fumbled, dropped the arrow, cursed and picked it up. Tried to nock it again. Failed. She could feel herself already becoming impatient.  _Come on, girl_ , she said to herself,  _don't let this stupid thing beat you already_. Sighing, she tried again.

It nocked! Oh joy! She did a little hop of excitement before reeling it in and reminding herself to focus. This was only the first step.

Kagome had never held a bow in her life. The only experience she had with a bow were from watching movies. Pulling upon those memories, she held the shaft of the bow in her left hand, the nocked arrow in her right, and slowly attempted to pull the string back, as forcefully as she possibly could.

Oh, it was difficult! The string was taut, and she struggled to pull back and keep the weapon as a whole steady. Carefully, she aimed. Her arms shook. She felt the first pricks of perspiration on her hairline.

She released the arrow.

It promptly fell to the ground by her feet.

"Ah…" she said, slightly embarrassed. She grit her teeth and nocked the arrow again. Drew it back.

She already felt weaker than her first attempt. But this time at the moment of release, it actually moved forward a few inches.

 _Two down, ninety-eight to go_ , Kagome thought as she picked up failed arrow number two and re-nocked.

"Again." She said aloud, drawing it back.

.

.

Her arms were like putty and her entire body drenched in sweat by the time Kaede appeared by her side. She was in the midst of aiming, but with her heavy breathing and tremoring muscles, she couldn't keep it on-target. Not that she'd hit it even once. Not that she'd come even close.

She grunted against the pain, knowing Kaede was there beside her, watching. She released.

The arrow flew off target to the left and about half a foot too short. Panting, Kagome doubled over and rested her hands on her knees. She glanced up at Kaede. Managed a smile. "Lunch ready yet?"

"Aye, ready and waiting," the old woman replied. "How have we been doing so far?"

Kagome straightened up slowly, stretching the muscles in her back, wheeling her shoulders to stretch those too. "Three more and I'm golden." She replied, taking a deep breath and reaching down to her pile of arrows. She had, over the past four hours, emptied her quiver as her arrows slowly shot further and further from where she stood. Once she was out, she'd gone out to collect them and pile them up beside her. She didn't bother re-loading the forgotten quiver on the ground. And so it had gone, shooting until she was out, then collecting and bringing them back.

She felt Kaede's hand on her shoulder as she began to nock. "How about stopping here, child?" She suggested. "You've done quite a bit already."

Kagome paused. It was tempting. It was incredibly tempting. Her entire upper body ached. She was already sick of shooting arrows. She would have switched happily to washing dishes or folding laundry in exchange, which were two chores she venomously hated.

 _Three more. If you can't handle three more, how can you handle Kikyou when you run into her again? How can you complete the jewel with all the dangers you'll face?_  She turned to Kaede; tried her best to smile. "Three more," she said. "I'll do your required one hundred if it kills me."

"Aye, lunch will wait." Kaede said, stepping back to observe. Was it just her imagination, or did she see approval in the old woman's eyes?

Kagome drew back. Released.

Again.

Again.

A failure at all three. Her body screaming. She wanted to cry. The bow dropped from her aching fingers as she plopped down onto the grass, wiping the sweat from her brow. She breathed deep, willing her beating heart to slow, willing her body to relax as Kaede's shadow fell over her.

"One hundred," she said, amusement etched in her voice. "Not many would have stood to the challenge."

Kagome sighed long and deep before hoisting herself back onto her feet. "You were right," she admitted. "I do need to learn to defend myself somehow. I'm not Sango or Hojou, and I don't have any magic abilities, although…" She trailed off,the image of fighting off Kikyou with that strange warmth fresh in her mind.

"You're a reincarnation of my sister. A doppleganger." Kaede said knowingly. "Inuyasha spoke to me in the room of how you two came to meet. He told me of the jewel in your side. He told me of the purification powers you possess."

She fought the knee-jerk reaction to deny being anything other than herself, remembering that Kaede was not Inuyasha, and did not deserve harsh words. Instead, she nodded. "It's kind of like magic, right? What I'm able to do with all that… heat." She said, for lack of a better word.

"Not quite," the old woman replied as they both headed into the house and towards the kitchen. "The magic Inuyasha and Kikyou possess is quite different. My sister's magic… Where she draws it from… It's ancient. Much more ancient than you or I, much more ancient than Inuyasha, and Inuyasha's father." She paused as they reached the kitchen, and Kaede ladled up some warm soup into a bowl for Kagome, placing it in front of her. "My sister… What she has become…" She shook her head. "Inuyasha is only able to access that power due to Kikyou weaving the entrapment spell. He was right to theorize that the longer my sister goes without re-spelling the mirror, the weaker the original spell will become. But that is not all…"

Kagome waited with bated breath for Kaede to finish. She'd gotten so little of the story the first night she and Sango had been out walking around with Inuyasha. And he was so cranky, trying to get it out of him had been like pulling teeth.

"I'm also theorizing that my sister will start losing all magical strength once enough time passes without her capturing Inuyasha into a spell again."

Kagome sat back, letting it all sink in. "Do you mean all of her spells will become weakened?" She asked.

"Aye," the old woman said. "That is what I believe."

Kagome mulled over the new information. If Kikyou could get weaker simply by Inuyasha being kept away from her, if  _all_  her spells could get weaker by Inuyasha being kept away…

 _Kohaku_ … She felt her heart start to beat wildly in her chest, excitement boiling over. If Kikyou weakened enough, that meant Sango's brother could possibly be saved. If Kikyou weakened enough, they could rid the earth of her for good. If all her spells wore off…

It suddenly clicked. Inuyasha's age. Kikyou's age. Kaede's age. She was old. Incredibly old. How had she not realized before? How was it even possible?

"Kaede…" she inquired gently, not wanting to offend. "You talk as if Kikyou is your sister, yet… She and Inuyasha are very, very old. Impossibly old. So how…?"

"Ah," the old woman sighed, looking deep into her own bowl of soup. "Aye, Kikyou is my sister, born of the same womb, three years apart." She smiled. "I am the elder of us two."

"But… but how?"

She sighed, heavy and deep. "Kikyou died. I was nineteen when it happened, married and with a basket of children myself." She looked up then, straight into Kagome's eyes. "Inuyasha was to blame."

Kagome jerked back, shocked. She quickly shook her head. "No, that can't be right. He's too revengeful towards her. He… he's hurt. There's no way he would be that hurt by her actions if he were to blame for her death."

"Aye, that's true. Very insightful of you. I should have said: Inuyasha was  _accused_  of blame. He had been seen attacking Kikyou and stealing the jewel for himself. It was said by witnesses that he used it to make himself more powerful. He used it to attack my sister, and she fou

ght back and managed to take back the jewel. Yet the damage was done. She slowly bled to death in my arms."

"Oh, Kaede…" Kagome uttered empathetically. She could see the moisture gathering in her eyes.

"Before she was gone, she begged to be cremated and sent on her way with the jewel. It was the only way to truly rid the world of it. It was the only way to stop those like Inuyasha who would use it for evil." She paused. "Or so we thought. Inuyasha had for some reason come back to the village, looking for my sister, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. As if playing some sort of sick game. The villagers gathered and chased him out. I was at the forefront." Her eyes were now gazing into the distance, lost in the memory. "I will never forget the hatred I felt for him. However… I will also never forget the absolute dismay and sorrowful look on his face as we pushed him back towards the woods."

Kagome stayed silent, caught up in the story.

"But I will tell you, years later, when my sister appeared to me again, and I saw the magic she possessed, saw how it changed her, how she came at me and spelled me with eternal life without eternal youth simply because I wished to do right by her afterlife, and saw Inuyasha just as sorrowful as I'd last seen him all those years ago… I began to wonder. Her magic changes things. The fact that she was re-animated at all does not align with my original theory of Inuyasha killing my sister. There is something else at play here. I just do not know what. All these years later, and I still do not know what."

Chills went up Kagome's spine. Could there be something else? Something more evil than Kikyou herself, controlling things behind the scenes? She contemplated everything Kaede had told her as the old woman finished her soup and placed their dishes in the sink. Kagome stood from her seat and started towards the dishes, but Kaede grabbed her wrist and shook her head.

"No, Child. Leave the dishes to me. You will be shooting another one hundred arrows."

Kagome opened her mouth to protest, shut it, and moaned with reluctance before heading back out to the meadow.

.

.

Sore and exhausted to the point of tears, another one hundred arrows down, Kagome ate her dinner and drank the delicious tea Kaede had set out for her. The old woman reminded her that it would be her turn to take over the healing process tomorrow, and that she was to continue shooting another set of one hundred arrows after breakfast, and another set after lunch. She explained sternly that she would know if Kagome slackened at all.

Gumpy and aching, Kagome finally crawled into bed and drifted to sleep.

She drea _med of Kohaku._

_He was leaning over Sango, his giant kama gripped in his hand, his sister's blood covering his face. Kagome screamed at him to stop, to leave her be. His head turned, his eyes filled with the same blood that had filled Hojou's. His lips pulled back into a terrifying grin and he stood, stalking towards her, his kama high above his head, ready to strike…_

_A light engulfed him, bright and all-consuming, blinding her. It wasn't the same heat that radiated from inside her. This was different. This heat was scorching._

_Inuyasha stood in front of her, materializing inside the flames, the same wide, chiseled back she'd come to know so well taking up her vision. He turned to look at her over his shoulder, eyes golden and playful._

" _What are you doing, Kagome? Get up. Let's go." He reached a hand out for her to take._

_Carefully, she slipped her fingers into his palm. He lifted her up, onto his back, his skin bright and glowing._

_He jumped._

_Up they went, higher and higher, until Kohaku was nothing but a speck on the ground. Too long they were in the air, and Kagome realised they weren't jumping. They were flying._

_Inuyasha shifted, turned to face her, arms wrapped protectively around her waist, and drew her in for a kiss._

_She gasped against his lips, against the tenderness of the kiss. She felt it again: the need. It pooled deep down below. It called to her._

_But then he was pulling away, his hands gripped tightly into her shirt, her feet dangling in the air._

" _Bitch," he growled. "You dare to betray me?"_

_Kagome's eyes widened. Fear shot through her._

No!  _She wanted to scream._ I didn't betray you!

_But it was too late._

_He let go._

_And she fell._

 


	27. Emergence

 

Kagome

Kagome awoke, covered in sweat.

Alone.

She attempted to shake the dreams that had played throughout the night from her memory. They hadn't been as severe, as clear or as horrifying as the previous night had been, but they were still upsetting. She slipped out from under the covers. Ugh, she was tired. She rubbed her hands over her face and up into her hair before she noticed the cup of tea sitting on the nightstand. She smiled. A note was tucked under it in cursive handwriting.

_**Warm it up, eat well and shoot two hundred arrows today.** _

It was simple and to the point, just like Kaede was.

Kagome didn't want to shoot more arrows. Her old self was seeping back in, and she struggled to keep it back. Her body ached, but her pride flared up inside her. She refused to go back to being a naive, helpless teen. She would not let down Kaede, she would certainly not let down her friends, and she would not let down Inuyasha.

No, she didn't want to think about him! She didn't want to think of him holed up in that room with her dying friends. She slapped at her cheeks to get herself to think of something,  _anything_  else. Food. She'd think about food. Slowly she stood and stretched, rubbing at certain sore spots around her body. She shuffled into the bathroom, showered, changed, and took the cup of tea into the kitchen, where a note signifying the day's meals was taped to the refrigerator door. Heating up both the tea concoction and her breakfast, she dug in, furiously hungry. And after getting herself mentally prepared, she grabbed the bow and quiver propped up by the front door and headed out to practice.

And so her day went by, agonizingly slow. She shot arrow after arrow. Arrow after arrow. Arrow after arrow, only pausing to eat. In the afternoon, her teeth grit against the soreness, she hit the tree, although still nowhere near the target. But she did it! The accomplishment energized and motivated her. She could do this. She could! With her drive renewed, she continued to release her arrows at her target, until the last one flew from her hands and struck the target on the outer edge.

She collapsed into bed exhausted after eating her dinner and drinking her tea.

Her dreams were sad, but less so than before.

The next day, Kaede was up with her at the crack of dawn, just as tight-lipped as before as to how her friends' healing was coming along. Frustrated, Kagome threw herself into the training, Kaede standing off to the side watching her. By mid-morning, she hit the tree every time. Some managed to snag the target. Most didn't. She was sore. Tired. Aching deep inside for a full day's rest. Five-hundred arrows she's nocked and released so far, and she was starting to get the hang of it, but it was slowly taking a toll on her body. How much could she possibly take before giving out completely?

Lunch was just as delicious as ever, and after she'd cleared her plate, much to her surprise, Kaede stopped her from retrieving her bow. The old woman bent down and picked it up herself.

"Let's try something different today," she said, her hand on Kagome's arm.

Curious, she followed Kade out to the meadow. She watched as she picked an arrow out of the quiver and looked it over closely. Then another. And another. Each one she discarded, dropping them to the ground next to her feet. Then she smiled.

"This one will do." She said, holding it out for Kagome to take.

"What are we doing?"

" _You_  are going to learn how to purify your enemy by using your arrows. Youkai are not so weak that a simple arrow from a simple bow will do much damage. You, however, have the ability to make these wounds count. You can severely injure a youkai with this technique. Sometimes it can even be deadly."

Kagome looked down at the arrow in her hand. The edge of the head was chipped and worn, the slim wood splintering, the feathers at the end sparse. She cocked an eyebrow. "Why this one?"

The old woman chuckled. "It's worn out. Your powers are not controlled yet, I don't want you shattering my new ones."

 _Shattering?_  Kaede was exaggerating, she had to be.

"Nock the arrow, child."

She did as she was told, nocking it into the bow and keeping it pointed to the ground, awaiting further instruction.

"Let it rest in your hands. Relax your arms, and-"

"Let me guess, close my eyes?" She interjected, before flushing in embarrassment at her cynicism. "S-sorry," she said.

"I was going to say breathe in deep, but by all means, close your eyes."

"Tha...That's okay."

"Deep breath in then," Kaede continued, "and let it out slow. Yes, just like that. Do it again. Now, your powers are physically driven by your soul, which mainly resides in the middle of your chest, underneath your breastbone." She tapped a finger against her own chest as a demonstration. "That is where your focus should lie. You should be able to feel it."

"Is it the heat?" Kagome asked. "I've felt it before, when Kikyou…" She trailed off.

A sad smile graced Kaede's lips. "It's alright, child. It's been a very long time since I would consider my sister human. You do not have to still your tongue for my sake."

"When she tried to kill me," she continued. "Both times. Right before I… right before I protected myself, I felt the heat in my chest."

"Aye, that's it. You will learn to control it. Breath in deep, hold it in, concentrate on the heat, let it build inside you. Release it into your arms and let it flow into your fingertips."

She could feel it inside, now that Kaede had pointed it out. Was it a heat that had always been there, that she hadn't noticed because she didn't know any different? It was right where Kaede said it was, a warm spot in the middle of her chest that she assumed was normal. And now, following Kaede's instructions, she felt it grow.

It expanded inside her chest, and her body shuddered violently as she tried in vain to keep it under control, but the swell of power was too fast, too heavy for her. It felt like her insides were pushing outwards. It spread down her arms, pricks of heat that pushed through her. She felt it reach her fingertips, but she couldn't restrain it. It lit up the arrow, bright white and hot. With a  _pop_ , the shaft exploded, bits of wood splintering outward. Kagome shrieked, dropped the bow and fell backwards.

"Ah. Careful, child."

"What was that?" She lifted a shaking hand to her face, eyes wide.

"You have to control it." Kaede handed her another worn arrow. "Again. Focus. Control it."

Kagome carefully notched it, biting her lip. She smiled sheepishly up at Kaede. "I think I'll close my eyes this time."

For hours Kagome conjured up the heat inside her and released them into arrows. By the fifth try, she had managed to control it enough that it didn't immediately explode in her hands, thank god. And a few hours more, she managed to release the arrow holding her powers. It flew across the meadow and sunk into the tree.

She tensed in anticipation, but the tree stayed solid and in one piece. Huh. How anticlimactic. Confused, she turned to Kaede. "Isn't it supposed to do something?"

"It's a purification arrow, dear. That's a tree. What kind of tree could you possibly purify?"

Kagome swore she caught the hint of a smile as Kaede turned and ambled back into the cabin. She fought the teenage urge to stick her tongue out. She nocked an arrow instead.

She knew she was doing it correctly, she could feel it pass from her arms into the arrow. But what was the point if she couldn't see the effects?

She drew. Released.

.

.

And so it went, day after day. Kagome moved on to action-shooting, hitting a target while running on her feet. She ran every morning and evening, the hours blending together only to be interrupted by her nightmares when she would finally fall into bed, exhausted.

They were getting better, but only slightly. Kaede urged her to continue drinking the tea, insisting that soon the dreams would completely fade away. Kagome had her doubts, but she wasn't going to argue. She felt better after drinking it, especially in the mornings, when she would awake, soaking and cold and dispirited.

And she was starting to dream of her family.

They would be so worried by now. Desperately homesick, she thought daily about going back. But Inuyasha's words rang true in her ear. The members of her family were not useful to Kikyou. And they were safer being as far away from her as possible. She couldn't be lured to Kikyou if she wasn't aware they were being held. She held onto that belief tightly, like a lifesaver.

Kaede would disappear into the room every other day, and Kagome had stopped expecting Inuyasha to emerge. She trained. She ran when she didn't want to, controlled her powers into arrows and shot them when she didn't want to, practiced her breathing when she didn't want to. Over and over, day after day.

Day after day.

It all blended together.

On day eleven she woke, drank her tea, and ran the path which was clearly marked over the years by Kaede. The loop ran out into the forest and around to end on the other side of the clearing. A good five miles. After her run, she shot her purification arrows. She ate lunch, drank her tea, shot her arrows, and ran the path. A mile and a half in, Kagome's legs were screaming. She'd been running the loop for five days straight now, twice a day every day, and it still wasn't getting any easier.

Only stubborn determination kept her moving; the thought that her friend's suffering would not be in vain. Her only goal now was to take Kikyou and her monk sidekick down, to free Kohaku.  _To free Inuyasha._  She added, keeping her eyes on the uneven terrain. Roots broke out of the earth and spread across the trials in random patterns, and small rocks and larger boulders all created an obstacle course ready and willing to trip her up and cause her to crash hard to the ground.

She concentrated on her breathing, her lungs burning.  _Long breathes in, fill your lungs, long breathes out…_  Kaede had instructed, thumping her on her back.  _Do not breathe in through your mouth, use your nose. Control it._

The thought that it was any day now, that the healing was so much closer to being completed, drove her to continue down the path. Dusk was falling, and Kagome was trying not to get her hopes up that Inuyasha would show his face the next morning. She wanted to explain everything to him. He had gone in that room angry with her, and she hated it. He still assumed she had meant to hand him over to Kikyou, and she hated it.

Kagome pushed herself to go faster. She didn't want to be running in the dark. She rounded a bend she'd come to know well and immediately stopped.

The hair on the back of her neck stood on end. Goosebumps raised across her skin. Her stomach churned inside her.

Something was screaming at her not to take another step. To not go any further. She hesitated. Took a step back. Then heard it.

It was a low clicking sound, fast and in long strings. She whipped her head around, peering deep into the darkening woods where she thought maybe the noise came from. It was like nothing she'd ever heard before. It was unnatural. It scared her.

Nope. Nope, she would not be finishing her run today, Kaede would just have to deal with it. She wasn't sure if it was everything that had happened until now that spooked her so much, but she was  _not_  hanging out around the middle of the woods to find out if she was being ridiculous.

She turned to head back and saw it out of the corner of her eye.

It moved fast. Unbelievably fast. A pale, pink-purple glow she glimpsed through the thicket. It zig-zagged low, blinking in and out as it moved around bushes and trees. Kagome had trouble keeping track of it.

She ran. Back in the direction she'd come from. Whatever it was, she was in its path. The light was growing brighter, moving towards her. The clicking grew louder, and if Kagome didn't think it was crazy, she would have sworn it sounded  _excited_.

And then she tripped.

"Oof!" She breathed, a rock digging into her side as she slammed into the ground. She looked behind her to see the cause of her fall - a root. A stupid root! Not wasting any time she rolled over to get to her feet.

She froze.

It had broken free from the thicket, its long, skeletal legs and joints holding up its rounded body. The colored glow she'd seen moving through the forest emanated from the top of its head, and it pulsated a steady, slow rhythm. It had a hundred eyes, all blinking separately from each other, creating a disturbing fluttering pattern. Its' mouth was made of what Kagome could only describe as a mandible, which is where the loud, fast clicking sounds came from.

Its legs, twenty of them, straightened out as far as they could, rising higher above Kagome, towering over her.

She struggled to inhale, her lungs paralyzed. It was a spider. A giant-freaking-spider.

"Wha- What the hell?!" She shrieked, backing away as fast and she could and getting to her feet. She was going to run. She was. But then it spoke to her.

"Huuuuckckckckmaaackn…." It said. Or at least, she thought it said. Her brain had to have short-circuited, there was no other reason she could think of that a spider so large could be actually speaking to her.

"Neeckeeckckckceeed Moooorckckcckrrrre fleeeckckckcecksh." It said, taking a step towards her.

She ran. Faster than she'd ever run in her life. She pushed her body, her lungs burning, her feet falling hard against the ground. Branches tore at her, she didn't bother dodging them. She had to get back to Kaede's meadow, where her bow and arrows lay unhelpful by her target practice spot.

Dusk was settling. It filtered less through the trees, making it hard to see. She couldn't tell if the creature was still behind her or not, but he had to be. She could hear it clicking, but couldn't tell if it was right on her tail or if she'd made any headway.  _Don't look!_  She screamed to herself.  _Don't look!_  But she couldn't help it. The terror gnawed at her. She had to know if these would be her final steps or if she might have a chance to get away. She turned her head to look behind her,

A leg came sweeping from her right. She caught a glimpse of it just as the needle-thin tip shot towards her ankle. She couldn't move fast enough. It pierced through her skin.

She screamed and tumbled forward, falling again. She got up. She got up ran and ignored the fact that it had stabbed her ankle, ignored the fact that the spot where it pierced her burned red hot. She could feel it slowly spreading up her leg. She ignored it.

She ran.

Adrenalin had taken over. Nothing mattered but to live. She pushed her legs, her right now incredibly painful, and broke through the forest's edge into the meadow. The dissipating sunlight touched her skin, and she could see better without all the trees. She shot towards where she knew her bow and arrow lay, her heart pounding, her body screaming at her. She could see her weapon on the ground ahead of her. Off somewhere in the distance, she swore she heard Inuyasha scream her name.

But he was in the room, saving her friends, not here. Not able to save  _her_.

She would have to save herself.

She dove for her bow, grabbing it and flipping over into a somersault, rolling out and swiping up an arrow as well. She nocked her arrow and spun on her feet to face her opponent.

But something was wrong. Her vision blurred, turning her target into a big, fuzzy mess. It looked like there were three giant blobs coming for her. It was getting darker, the sun starting to set below the treetops. She hadn't noticed, but the burning pain had made its way higher. What had the creature done to her when it stabbed her with its leg? What had he injected into her to cause her wobble?

She fell on her butt, sweat pouring from her forehead. She squinted her eyes, trying to get a clear look at her target. But it was too fuzzy, and the light was diminishing by the second.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, STUPID?!" A voice shouted at her.  _His_  voice. "SHOOT HIM!" She had to be imagining it. She had to be. With her befuddled mind and hazy eyesight and leg that would no longer work properly, she was imagining Inuyasha calling out to her. And imaginary Inuyasha was right: she couldn't hesitate any longer. The monster spider may have succeeded in killing her, but she wasn't going down without at least giving it some pain from her own hands. She collected the energy inside her, pooled it together and let it flow down her arms, into her hands just as she'd practiced so many times before. She drew back her arrow. Released.

It screamed. Or, at least, she thought it screamed with its rapid, high-pitched clicking. Pale, pastel light burst bright in the night sky, she could see even that through her hindered vision.

And then movement. She could barely see it, but she felt the air move around her. More screaming. Panic welled up inside her. She didn't want to die yet! She didn't want these to be the last moments of her life!

She didn't want to die!

...The blow never came, as she cowered with her bow in her hands, no more arrows around for her to use as a defense, yet the noise intensified. Click-screaming, sickening crunching, and then… loud cursing?

"God Dammit, Kagome!" His voice said. "Are you okay?"

His hands were on her. Cupping her face, pushing her hair back, gripping onto her shoulders and shaking her. "What did he do to you? Did he bite you? Where is it? Where did he bite you?" His hands moved to the hem of her shirt and pulled it up to check her torso for any wounds.

"My- my ankle. It stabbed my ankle." She gasped out.

And then his hands were gone. She suddenly felt too cold without them. At first she thought maybe he had left, but she felt movement at her hip and realized he was touching her ankle. She just couldn't feel his hands on her. Her leg was completely numb.

She felt the tears well up. What had that  _thing_  done to her? She could barely see anymore, and the burning from her leg was slowly seeping into her hip. Her leg was useless. Would this be her life now? Blind and paralyzed?

The thought terrified her.

"Fuck," Inuyasha cursed again. And then his hands were back cupping her face. He lifted her chin to where his eyes must have been. She couldn't see them anymore. "Kagome, it poisoned you. I need to get it out of you fast, but it's going to hurt. Where has the burning reached to?"

She moved her arm. Pointed to her hip, right where her underwear lay.

"Okay. Kaede, hold her head." He ordered. And she felt the old woman underneath her, moving her onto her lap. A cool compress was placed on her forehead, and then something touched her lips. The strong smell of leather invaded her senses.

"Bite onto it, child." The old woman said. Kagome could hear the worry in her voice. She obeyed, opening her mouth and biting down hard into the material. Kaede gripped both sides of her head. Hard.

She felt Inuyasha's hand on her hip, just barely through the pain. He gripped onto her running shorts and ripped them from the hem up. Kagome gasped. Kaede hushed her. "It's okay, it's okay," she breathed. "He needs to find the end of the poison trail."

She heard him grunt. "There it is, the fucker." He said. And she felt him push up the line of her panties with his thumb, over the swell of her hip. Her breath quickened. She could feel her heart racing, out of fear or embarrassment she wasn't sure. A mix of the two, probably.

"Sorry, Kagome," he said. "This is going to hurt."

And then his claw dragged across her flesh, ripping it open.

She screamed into her gag, biting hard into the leather. Kaede kept her head still, despite her thrashing. Then she felt his mouth on her wound, felt a gentle pressure. He was sucking at it. She gasped; moaned as she felt the burning move slowly up her leg again. She could feel it under her skin, traveling towards the wound Inuyasha had created. It hurt. It hurt so bad. Fresh tears leaked from her eyes, rolling down her temples and into her hair.

Inuyasha lifted his head and she heard him spit. "Okay, it shouldn't move up her side any higher, I got it oozing out of her hip." she thought she heard him say. But she wasn't sure. She was passing out due to the pain. "Kagome, can you hear me? Kagome! ...Shit, get ready, Kaede. I have to open up and drain it from her ankle, too."

Nothing mattered anymore. She was passing out.

"Goddammit, it's turning black!"

She was passing out….

 


	28. Almost Like the Sun

 

Inuyasha

He stepped out of the room and closed the door behind him, cautious of the stray beams of light that splayed patterns on the floor. His jaw clenched as he flattened his back against the wall and slid down the hallway.

If he was smart he would have stayed in that dark, suffocating room, nothing but him and the almost-corpses. But he wasn't smart. And now that they were breathing on their own, he couldn't handle it anymore. It wasn't much different than being in his mirror.

The healing had worn him out. He'd been in that room for days, and they blended together behind his eyes and caused him to lose track of time. He'd been worried at first that Kagome would take off while he was in there healing her stupid friends, but Kaede had assured him each time she came in to take over that she had not run off, and that it seemed like she was determined to stick around.

And yeah, Kaede could have been lying, but Inuyasha wasn't about to exit the room to see for himself until he was ready to leave on the hunt for the jewel, which was going to be tonight, dammit. He didn't want to be around  _her_  more than he had to.

Plus, he didn't want to be forced to kiss her.

He didn't want to see her face.

Not that avoiding her was helping him any. Every damn time he closed his eyes to try and sleep Kagome materialized behind his lids. He had wet dreams. Consistently. Every night. It drove him  _fucking crazy_. He had never been so obsessed before. He had been in love with Kikyou all those years ago, he really had. But even then, his urges and dreams and needs had been  _nothing_  compared to how Kagome made him feel.

...It had to be due to lack of intimacy over all those years he'd been trapped like an animal. It had to be. Because how else could he explain the fucking  _need_  he felt every time he was near her?

He had to stay strong while he was around her. He had to. Because he was going to have to deal with her one-on-one for a long-ass time. And as much as he fucking hated to admit it, she was the only thing that allowed him his freedom. He could not trust her, but he needed her.

...Dammit.

Slowly, side-stepping stray beams of light, he tiptoed through the house. He didn't want to let the women know he'd emerged yet. He just wanted some food.

Ears twitching, moving like a goddamn cat, he made his way to the fridge. Opened it up, served himself some rice and stir-fry. Like a greedy child, he ate his way through the bowl right where he stood, fridge open, cold air billowing around his bare feet. Then he helped himself to another bowl. Poured himself some tea.

His lethargy started to fade after filling his stomach, and he shut the fridge and took in his surroundings. Something he hadn't been able to do when he and the wench first arrived.

The kitchen was old but well used. Dishes clean, counters wiped, floors sparkling. The pictures hanging on the wall were dusty though. He made his way back into the living room. An eclectic mix of furniture was scattered around, different pieces from different time periods. It reminded him of the museum.

He fucking hated it.

The TV was dusty. The books were dusty. Kaede didn't spend a lot of time in here.  _Where is that old hag anyway?_  He thought, purposely not thinking about  _her_  name. She couldn't have gone far, and the sun was setting soon. He made his way back towards the hallway when he heard it: a creaking. He swiveled his ear around to get a better listen. It was coming from right outside.

He peeked out the window next to the front door. The sun was setting on the side of the house, which meant most of the porch was dark enough for him to step outside.

He cracked the door open.

Kaede sat in a rocking chair, long, dry leaves piled next to her. She was weaving them into a basket. How stupid. Inuyasha cracked the door open a bit more and stepped out into the encroaching night. "Oi," he said.

She turned to look at him out of her good eye before she continued her rocking. "You've come out." She said. "They must be done."

She talked about the two like they were a steak dinner. Didn't bother him any. "Keh," He said, leaning up against the railing and folding his arms across his chest. "Wasn't easy. But they'll live."

"Any idea when they'll wake up?"

He rolled his eyes. "Don't know, don't care. Not my problem."

"Kagome will be asking."

He turned to gaze out towards the meadow, eyes sweeping everything in. "Fucking let her ask. I don't owe the bitch nothin'. Not after she pulled that shit. Not after I saved her friends."

Kaede sighed, heavy and long. "She's just a child, Inuyasha."

"She's grown enough." He snapped, his attention returning to her. "I wasn't much older than she is when this whole fucking mess started for me."

"It was a different time then. You know that."

He narrowed his eyes. Kaede was pissing him off. He wasn't going to be lectured after doing a favor for the bitch. "Keh. Doesn't matter," he said. "We're leaving in the morning." He paused, eyes raking across the meadow once more. It was peaceful, lit up by the last rays of the sun. "Where is she, anyway?"

"She's running. Building stamina. I can't have her traveling with you without a bit of protection." The corner of her mouth twitched into a smile. It looked wrong, pressing up against the permanent frown lines etched into her face.

"She doesn't need protection. She just needs to detect the shards."

"You can't be everywhere at once, Inuyasha. There will come a time where your defenses will fall, and at that time Kagome must know how to protect herself."

"What's she going to do, run away?" He asked dryly.

"Aye, if it saves her life."

"Wench, I keep telling you, I-"

His ears perked atop his head, his focus suddenly shifted elsewhere. His eyes followed, peering across the meadow and deep into the forest line. He heard it again. A crack. Clicking. The rustling of leaves. His brows scrunched together, concentrating on the sound. It was familiar. A noise he'd heard a long time ago, he just couldn't…

"What is it, Inuyasha?" Kaede asked, pausing her basket weaving.

"Something's coming." He growled, then whipped his head around. "Where's Kagome?"

"I told you, she's running. She-"

The noise grew louder. Impossibly loud. Kaede jumped from her seat and moved to the railing alongside Inuyasha, searching out into the line of trees with him.

More noises mixed in, and Inuyasha fought to separate them. Footsteps, hard and fast. Breathing, panicked and gasping. A heart pounding. He heard it all. His eyes widened when it fell into place.

Kagome had gone for a run, and the noises were coming from the trail leading off into the woods.

"What-" Kaede asked.

She burst from the treeline first, hair wild and tangled with twigs and leaves, body scraped and bruised, running out of the darkened forest and into the sunlight. She headed straight for the other side of the meadow. And it came behind her, the spider youkai. Trees crashed and crunched around his large body, splintering out of the way as he tore from the trees. His legs reached out for her.

"Shit!" Inuyasha cried, crouching down to leap out and tear the bastard's head off.

"Wait, Inuyasha the sun!" Kaede gripped onto his arm just before he jumped. "You'll be sucked back in!"

 _Fuck! Fuckfuckfuckfuck!_  He screamed in his head. The old hag was right. He wouldn't be able to do shit if he was sucked back into the mirror. His eyes darted to the sinking sun. It wasn't sinking fast enough, dammit, and the youkai would kill Kagome as soon as he caught her.

And he  _would_  catch her, especially now that they were free of the trees.

"KAGOME!" He shouted, fighting the urge to jump out anyway. "OVER HERE!" Why the hell was she running across the meadow? Fucking idiot, was she  _trying_  to get herself killed? She should have headed straight to the house, he couldn't do a damn thing while she kept to the sunlight. She was going to die, and he was fucking stuck here, watching. His freedom slowly slipping from his grasp.

**What are you doing, fool, get her! Protect what is yours.**

_Shut up!_  He growled inwardly at his youkai. He fucking knew he needed to protect her, but he couldn't! He opened his mouth to scream at her again, desperate to get her attention, but then his mouth snapped shut.

He watched as Kagome dove forward into an incredibly graceful roll for a human. She plucked up a discarded bow and arrow, and by the time she had spun to face her attacker, she had it nocked and drawn.

 _Where the fuck did she learn that?!_  He thought, dumbfounded. Her face was set with grim determination. He watched, waiting as the sun slowly, slowly lowered over the treeline, the darkness creeping towards where she stood. She looked like she knew how to use that thing, which meant she actually had a chance to survive. As long as she could hold the bastard off until the sunset. Just as he started to believe she might make it, he saw her falter. Saw her eyes squint into little slits, as if sweat had gotten into them. She swayed on her feet, as if the earth were water beneath them, and then promptly fell onto her butt.

He snapped. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING, STUPID?" He roared across the clearing. "SHOOT HIM!"

The youkai was on her then, legs poised and ready to strike. Inuyasha's eyes widened as Kagome's purification powers, the same he'd seen her use twice before, poured from her chest and into her arms, flowing with a grace he hadn't yet seen her posses. She pushed it into the arrow, lighting it up, and released.

Bright light. Inuyasha threw his arms up to protect his eyes. The youkai screamed, causing him to flatten his sensitive ears to his head. Then the light faded, and the meadow was covered in darkness.

Darkness.

Inuyasha leapt.

He flew out into the meadow, faster than he'd ever moved before. The arrow had done some damage, there was a big gaping wound in the youkai's chest, but it was recovering and moving towards her again. He had only seconds.

 _Stay away from Kagome, you bastard!_  He drew his arm back, claws extended, and swung. The force of his strike hit the youkai full-on. His body ripped apart into shreds and fell sloppily against the ground, blood spurting out across his chest and into his hair. "Fuck." He said, picking a bit of gore off his neck.

He turned to Kagome, who was clutching her bow against her chest, eyes wide and darting around, trying to see through the darkness. She was trembling, arms and legs tucked in. It had been too close, the youkai almost had her. Didn't matter though. He wasn't letting that shit happen again.

"Goddammit Kagome, are you okay?" He asked, kneeling down beside her and cupping her head in his hands so she'd look at him. But something was wrong. Even in the darkness, she should have been able to see him up close. But her eyes continued to dart around, as if she still couldn't make him out.

He didn't fucking like it.

He growled, pushing her bangs back, hands roaming over her shoulders, looking desperately for a bite. If she couldn't see, it meant it poisoned her somehow, and spider-youkai poison was deadly.

But there was no bite. He cursed again. He couldn't smell where it was coming from, the stench of youkai blood clogged his senses. "What did he do to you?" He growled. "Did he bite you? Where is it? Where did he bite you?" He could feel his desperation rise with each question. He wasn't going to let her die. No fucking way. He needed her.  _He needed her._  He gripped the hem of her shirt and lifted it up, unsatisfied with her slow answers. Nothing. She was clean.

"My- my ankle. It stabbed my ankle." He saw her jaw clench, saw the perspiration on her forehead. She was in a fuckton of pain. His eyes darted down to her foot, widening at the small puncture wound right above the end of her fibula. It oozed and bubbled around the edge.

He moved to take a closer look at it, gently turning her leg back and forth. The puncture wound was deep, and there was definitely poison injected into it. Which meant any small movement would push the poison to spread more through her bloodstream until it reached her heart.

 _Dammit_ , he thought, glancing up at her face. Her eyes were still wide. He could see the tears welling up inside of them. She was scared, and she should be, because youkai poison was no joke.

But he wasn't going to give in that easy. Not when he was so close to his freedom. Not when he'd finally found the one person that could help him put Kikyou to rest.

 **And you haven't even claimed her yet,**  his youkai chuckled darkly.

He pushed it back. Just because he needed her alive didn't mean he trusted her. He would not let himself succumb to his lust again, despite his youkai instincts. He would save Kagome here and she would gain him his freedom. No more, no less.

He would not let her die.

"Fuck," he cursed, watching the red blisters eat away at the naturally clear skin of her calf. If he waited much longer he'd just have to cut it off.

He didn't want to fucking cut off her leg.

Kaede appeared behind him then, he only noticed when she placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, peeking over to see the damage with her own eyes. She shook her head. Not good, she was conveying silently. Not any fucking good.

Kagome deserved to know what was going on. She was terrified, but Inuyasha would have wanted to know himself. He cupped her face in his hands again, tilting her up so she was looking in the right direction. The poison had blinded her. Hopefully not permanently. "Kagome," he said, "it poisoned you. I need to get it out of you fast, but it's going to hurt. Where has the burning reached to?"

Her arm moved, pointed to her hip.

Shit. That was pretty high.

He'd have to move fast. "Okay. Kaede, hold her head," he ordered as he followed the poison trail up, up, up her leg. He reached out and gripped onto her running shorts. Glanced up to check that Kaede had a good grip on her. Ripped the fabric up the hem, careful not to nick her. His ears twitched as she gasped, and he bit his tongue against the youkai urge that rose up inside him.

"It's okay, it's okay," Kaede soothed. "He needs to find the end of the poison trail."

And find it he did. He could see it right underneath the line of her panty strap, right at the widest part of her hip. "There it is, the fucker," he grunted. He'd have to make the cut right above it and get it moving out of her. He couldn't let any of the poison seep up into her heart. With the pad of his thumb he pushed the fabric of her panties up, clearing the way for him to work. His ears flicked again as he caught the way her breath quickened. He bit back a throaty growl. Now wasn't the fucking time to let his instincts take over.

Instead, he apologized. "Sorry, Kagome. This is going to hurt." And he dragged his claw across her hip, tightening his hold on her legs as she thrashed against the pain. He locked eyes with Kaede. The more she moved, the faster the poison would spread. If he was going to do it, he had to do it quick. He pressed his mouth down onto the wound, ignoring the pool of blood that collected and ran down her hip. He sucked as hard as he could, relying on Kaede's help to keep her still. He kept the suction going until he tasted it.

It stung his mouth.

He pulled back quickly and spit, wiping his mouth against the bottom of his shirt, dragging it across his tongue to get rid of any lingering poison. "Okay, it shouldn't move up her side any higher, I got it oozing out of her hip," He said to Kaede. She glanced down at Kagome, then back up to Inuyasha, her eyes wide. She shook her head, meaning they were losing her. She was losing consciousness.

 _Shit_. "Kagome, can you hear me?" He said, raising his voice while moving back down to her ankle. "Kagome!" He paused, waiting for her to reply. Nothing came.

"Shit. Get ready, Kaede. I have to open up and drain her ankle too." He reached down, tearing his claw across the puncture wound, opening it up further. He winced at the blood oozing out from the incision. "Goddammit, it's turning black!" It made his stomach churn. He didn't want to put his mouth on it. But he had seconds. Seconds to do it or she'd lose her foot. Once the skin itself started turning black, her leg was done for.

He took in a deep breath and placed his mouth against the wound.

He gagged. Pushed through it. Sucked enough out to fill his mouth before spitting it out. Then he did it again. Three times he gagged and spit. He tried not to vomit as he watched the poison ooze out and bubble as it dripped onto the grass. Kagome wasn't moving

 _Shit_. He reached out and pushed Kaede's hands away. Kagome's head lolled to the side and the leather bit dropped from her slackened mouth. He couldn't let her pass out. He gripped onto the collar of her shirt and slapped her across the face.

Not that hard, but hard enough. "Wake up." He growled, slapping her again. Her lids fluttered open, and he lifted her head up enough to look at him.

Her eyes focused in on him. "Inu...yasha," she said.

"Can you see again?" He asked. She nodded. Relief spread through him. "Good, means it's working. What the fuck happened? Where did he come from?" He noticed halfway through that her eyes had slid past him, and for a moment he worried that she was going blind again. But her arm lifted, pointing weakly behind him.

"There…"

He turned to look over his shoulder, eyes widening when he saw the pieces, the  _bits_  of the youkai slowly moving, each individually pushing themselves towards a larger piece. It was fucking  _gluing itself together_.

"What the fuck?" Inuyasha placed Kagome back into Kaede's lap and moved towards the youkai, watching with fascination as it grew larger and larger. It wasn't possible. He'd never seen anything like it before. Regeneration, sure, in certain youkai… But dead bits of flesh that moved on its own to re-create the form…?

Inuyasha charged at the gathering mess, his claws ripping through once again. It didn't take much force this time, it wasn't even half-formed, and the youkai splattered out into tiny pieces once again. He stood in the middle of the gore, watching intently. Waiting.

He took in a sharp breath as the pieces began to move again. What the fuck was going on? He growled deep in his throat and tightened his fists at his sides. Maybe if he tore everything up and burned it? Then would the damn thing stay dead?

"Inuyasha…" Kaede called to him at the edge of the gore. He whipped his head around to see Kagome leaning against her, one arm draped heavily over her shoulders, poisoned leg limp and useless still. "She sees it."

Sees what? He frowned, looking around for what the old hag could be talking about. Found nothing.

"There," Kagome said, pointing again with her finger. Inuyasha traced an invisible line to a larger piece of flesh off to his right and moved in to take a closer look. He frowned. The only thing different was this piece was not moving like the others. In fact, the other pieces were moving towards this particular glob. Was this the piece he had to burn? He looked back at Kagome, threw her a  _so what?_  look.

"Don't you see it?" She called. "It's so bright!"

Inuyasha shared a worried glance with Kaede. Maybe the poison had affected Kagome worse than he'd thought. "What are you talking about? There's nothing." He said.

"There is!" She argued, struggling to get the words out. "It was at the top of his head when he was chasing me. It's in there! There!" Her finger waved around as if it would make the light magically she was talking about magically appear.

Frowning, trying his damned hardest not to snap at her, he reached down and poked the wad of flesh with his claw, wincing as it was swallowed up into wet, sticky gore. It pushed in easily. Something sharp stuck the tip of his finger. Curious, he dug his thumb in as well, pinching it between the two and pulling it out.

His eyes widened, breath hitched in his throat. No way.

 _No fucking way_.

It was a shard. A fucking Shikon shard. Thin and razor sharp, it had pierced through his skin and drawn blood. And now here it lay, in the palm of his hand. The first piece of the weapon he would need to gain his freedom.

It all made sense now, the wild bloodlust of the youkai, the way it had seemed mutated from the normal spider youkai form…. The jewel gave the youkai holding it great, impossible power. No wonder the fucker wouldn't go down.

Inuyasha peered closely at the jewel shard, shifting it in his hand. It was darker than he remembered it, not the bright, light shade of pink-purple the whole jewel had been. But it didn't matter. It fit there. It felt right in his palm. It was exciting. Exhilarating. His heart began to hammer within his chest. It was a rushing thud-thud-thud in his ears. His blood felt thick and swollen as if sludge in his veins. The shard. The shard.

 **Kill the others** _ **.**_  His youkai growled.  **You don't need them anymore. They will take it from you. Kill them and you will have it for yourself.**

Yes, the jewel was his. The shards were his. The others should not be allowed to take it. They would not be able to handle it. He should kill them and be done with it. He-

"Inuyasha."

His eyes snapped to the old crone, who had somehow moved to his side without him noticing.  **How dare she!**   **She will take the jewel. Kill her.**  His hair stood on end. His claws not holding the jewel flexed into a fist. A growl ripped from his throat.

"Give it to me, Inuyasha." She said, her eyes searching his own.

He took a step back, crouching low, ready to attack.

Then  _she_  stepped out from behind Kaede. Her skin was pale, her dark hair wet and sticking to her cheeks. She stood in front of him, her hand held out. "The jewel came from inside of me, Inuyasha," she said, voice weak and wobbly. "Let me keep it safe for you."

He hesitated, eyes darting from Kagome to Kaede. His fingers closed around the jewel.

She reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder, a weak smile on her lips. "Let me keep it safe for you." She repeated.

Her hand was warm, even though his shirt, even though it was cold outside. He moved to push it away, his youkai screaming at him to kill her, but it cut off when he touched his hand to hers.

 _Yes,_  he thought.  _She will keep it safe for me._

Slowly Inuyasha stood to his feet, moving her hand from his shoulder and turning it palm-side up. He slowly tipped his other hand, the one holding the shard, and let it fall from his palm right into hers.

He blinked, the fog in his head clearing, his heart easing into a more regular rhythm. The sudden onset of bloodlust had been almost overwhelming, his youkai fighting to take control. He watched as the shard slowly changed back into the light, pretty color he remembered the whole jewel being. What did it the dark color mean? And why had he had such a reaction to it?

"...You okay?" Kagome asked, eyebrow raised.

 _...Was_  he okay? He frowned, checking that his youkai was in control. Yes, it was, but it was still repeating the same shit over and over again in the back of his mind. He could now just resist as he usually did. "Yeah." He growled, attempting to keep a steady voice. He watched her closely as she inspected the shard, for any signs of altered moods. But she looked the same. Tired. Worn.

"How could you not see it in there?" She continued, looking down at the shiny piece of glass in her hand. "It's so bright, almost like the sun."

Inuyasha shot Kaede another worried glance, but the old hag seemed resigned, not worried. She wrapped Kagome's arm around her shoulders again and pulled her towards the house. "Let's get you inside, child," she said. "That poison was no small matter. I'll feel better once there's some tea in you."

Inuyasha snorted. "Tea's not going to do shit," he mumbled under his breath but followed behind the two girls with one last glance at the bloody remains strewn across the meadow. The bits were no longer moving. They had been animated by the jewel.

It was nothing short of eerie, the gore bathed in moonlight.

.

.

The living room was cozy and warm, and Inuyasha parked himself in a big, comfortable, oversized chair to watch as Kaede moved too quickly get Kagome more comfortable. He tried to keep his eyes off Kagome, but it was hard. Kaede had her curled up next to the fireplace, wrapped up in a blanket. Her leg was still red and irritated. She was still pale. But she'd stopped sweating so damn much, which was a good sign.

It had been too close. He had to be careful with her. For whatever reason it hadn't occurred to him that other youkai might have gotten their hands on the shards, in which case they'd be running into mutant youkai all over the place. At this point, anything that threatened Kagome was a threat to his freedom.

**Plus, it would be such a shame for her her die before you've had a full taste.**

_God dammit, would you shut up already?_  He snapped, pushing against his youkai. He would not give in to the lust. He didn't think straight when he succumbed. He made wrong choices. His youkai was impulsive, constantly making rash decisions based on whatever was happening at the time. That would change, however, once the jewel was complete. His youkai would be stronger and better controlled. He could rid himself of Kagome, take the whole jewel and use it to force Kikyou back into her resting place, and he would have the rest of his long life to find someone else to fulfill his more…  _carnal_  desires with.

And he'd already gotten a taste of the power the jewel possessed. The absolute strength he would have access to would be worth the long wait. It would be worth the torture of being forced to stay by the side of yet another woman he could not trust.

"How are you feeling, Kagome?" Kaede was asking, snapping Inuyasha from his thoughts. She was assisting Kagome with drinking the tea, tipping it into her mouth for her.

Kagome tried to smile. It looked more like a grimace, which meant she was still in a fair amount of pain. "I'm fine, I'm… better. Just happy to be alive." Her brows furrowed then. "I will live, right? My leg will be okay."

Kaede turned to peer at Inuyasha over her shoulder. He quickly looked away, across the room towards the bookshelf. He didn't want the wench to get the wrong idea and think that he actually cared about her or anything.

"Keh," he said. "Don't be an idiot, you'll live. I got the poison out fast enough." He kept his eyes glued straight ahead. He wouldn't look, he wouldn't look, he wouldn't look.

"Thank you," she said, her voice floating through the air to reach his ears. It took everything he had to keep them still, to not twitch them in her direction. "You saved my life."

He folded his arms. "Keh." He said again.

He heard her swallow, nervously, he thought. "My… My friends…..."

He clenched his teeth. Did she ever think of anything other than her stupid friends? The fact that he was forced to strike a deal for their life was humiliating enough. What else did she expect from him?

He would not answer her question.

Kaede sighed. "The fact that he's out at all means they've made it through the worst of it," she said kindly. "It was not an easy task, Kagome. They may not wake for a while."

"Mmm," she said. There was a long pause, the only sound soft breathing and fire crackling. She shifted, sat up to look towards him, a painful moan tumbling from her lips as she moved. "I will keep my promise, Inuyasha." Each word was punctuated with a heavy, fatigued breath. He couldn't help it. He looked.

She looked the same: sickly. But her hands were closed into fists, her jaw clenched, her eyes burning with determination.

He hated her. He did.

But damn, there was a very large possibility that he'd underestimated her nerve. And he couldn't help small unfurling of respect that spread through him. The way she had dived for her bow, the way she'd nocked it and aimed, the way she'd held her ground. Kaede's training had changed something inside of her. She was no longer the whiny schoolgirl that vomited after shifting.

Yeah. She had some nerve.

He wouldn't show his newfound respect, though. He had to stay in control.

"Yes, you will keep your promise," he said, his voice implying that that was the end of it: he would not discuss it anymore. He pushed himself back into the chair, trying to find the most comfortable position, throwing his leg over an armrest and his arm coming up over his head. He let his eyes lazily roam around the room.

He was free again to sleep where he chose for the first time in many, many years.

He chose to sleep right there.

 


	29. Farewell

 

Kagome

"It is not a good idea."

Kagome watched the dancing flames in the fireplace, the hushed whispers of her companions floating through the air and reaching her ears. They thought she was asleep, but she had gotten to a point where she couldn't stand Kaede's hovering, and since getting up and walking outside at this point was impossible, she did the next best thing. She faked it. Curled on her side, cocooned in a blanket, she kept her breathing even and slow.

Kaede would never have allowed her to hear the argument she was having with Inuyasha otherwise.

"We've already wasted too much time," Inuyasha growled. "You're assuming that Kikyou isn't already out collecting shards herself. She knows what we can do with them. We have to get to them first."

"You will kill her if you keep such a pace. Let her rest. Just a few more days."

"It  _can't_  be a few more days. She's healing already, she'll be fine. Besides, it's not like she'll be walking. Going at that pace even without being injured would be painfully slow."

Kagome rolled her eyes. Jackass. It wasn't her fault she didn't have magical transporting powers, or heightened youkai abilities.  _Besides,_  she thought, wrapping the blanket more tightly around her,  _he's the one that needs me. Not the other way around._

She was okay with the idea of leaving tomorrow night. She understood that waiting around for Sango and Hojou to wake up wouldn't help anything, and it wasn't like they weren't safe out here, hidden away in Kaede's large, cozy hut. But she couldn't deny the fact that she was scared. She had been nervous previously, but… That was before the Spider youkai.

She couldn't close her eyes without seeing it towering over her, poison dripping from its clicking mandible, insect legs reaching out to gouge her.

She had seriously thought she was going to die, and she could think of nothing more terrifying than losing the use of her legs or her eyes. Both were unimaginable, and she had lived in that very possible reality for a few, short moments.

She tried to suppress a shiver. Failed.

"Just promise me you'll be gentle with her." Kaede was saying.

"Keh. She ain't glass. Tonight should have proved that more than anything."

"She's a child."

"Not this crap again."

Kagome pushed the blanket up over her ears, pressing her hands against them to drown out their conversation. She didn't want to hear them talking about her anymore. She just wanted to sleep.

But she was afraid to close her eyes.

The flames danced in front of her, heating her face. She watched the movement as if in a trance, actively trying to force her thoughts in a more calm direction. She was tired. Her leg ached. She just wanted to be at home, in her bed, drifting off after finishing her homework. Anywhere but where she was. Anybody's life from her own.

She tried to sleep.

It wasn't happening.

.

.

The fire had died down to crackling embers. Kaede had gone to sleep hours ago, retreating into her own bedroom. Inuyasha had stayed seated in the chair behind Kagome during his argument with Kaede, moving only when Kaede closed her bedroom door. Kagome stayed still, trying to figure out what he was doing as she heard him start to move around. Trying to get more comfortable, maybe? Surprise hit her when she heard him move towards the bookshelf, the familiar sound of pages turning reaching her ears. He was reading a book.

He didn't seem like the reading type.

She tried not to think about what kind of books interested him, but failed. She was just so curious. Did he read serious-type stuff? Biographies or history or science journals? Or was he a fiction reader? Fantasy and sci-fi or action? Fantasy didn't seem reasonable for him. His whole life was a fantasy story, with magic and youkai and living for years and years and years… She stored the new information she'd learned about him away to bring up at a later time, hopefully after he was less cross with her.

Maybe they'd be able to chat about Harry Potter?

She suppressed a giggle as he turned the pages.

That had also been hours ago, and while she'd felt comfort in the simple normalcy of his actions, it still didn't lull her to sleep. Eventually Inuyasha dozed off, and she was alone again with her thoughts.

They drifted back to Sango and Hojou.

The only thing that made her upset about leaving tomorrow was that Kaede and Inuyasha both seemed to be against the idea of her saying goodbye to her friends. It was if they thought it would traumatize her, which was ridiculous because she'd been traumatized already. So why not add to the whole experience? Why not make it count?

Slowly she lifted the blankets from over her head and turned to peek over her shoulder.

He was sitting in the worn, comfy armchair, one leg thrown over a big, curly armrest. He was pressed into the corner, his head supported by his shoulder and the back of the chair. Eyes closed, breathing even. His ears were still atop his head, if not a bit slanted. Relaxed. The book he'd been reading was split open and laid out on his chest.

She wasn't going to get another chance.

She sat up, inch by inch, her eyes glued to him for any signs that he could hear her. Slowly she pushed the blanket back, unwrapping it from around her feet. Her leg was a dull red now, her thigh an almost healthy shade of pink. Could she stand on it?

She pushed herself up, her good leg taking the weight, and pressed her injured foot onto the floor. She grimaced as pins and needles spread through her leg, a sign the feeling was coming back. It wasn't exactly painful, but it probably would be eventually once her nerve endings recovered.

She couldn't walk on it as well as she'd hoped, but she was able to limp, and that was enough. She moved as quietly as possible, using the wall and bookshelf to help her along. Every other second she froze, watching the hanyou for signs that he'd heard her.

He was still. A gorgeous statue, almost too perfect to be real. She caught herself staring for far too long multiple times.  _Stop it_ , she scolded.  _You can't keep getting distracted by him. How the hell are you going to complete the jewel if you can't be near him without drooling?_  ...She didn't want to think about the issue with Hojou either. It was a complicated mess that she hadn't had time to sort through yet. She had to keep pushing it down, She would deal with it when she had the time. Now was not the time.

It took ages to make her way down the hall. Once she was out of sight of the hanyou her heart began to hammer. At every step, she was sure he'd heard her. At every moment she was sure he was coming for her.

She reached her hand out and gripped the handle of the forbidden room, breathing deep before twisting.

It opened with a click.

"What are you doing?"

She jumped and pressed a hand to her chest. "Ohmygod, Inuyasha" she breathed all at once. "You scared me."

"I asked you what you're doing." He repeated, arms crossed over his chest. There was no filtered moonlight in the hallway, she could only make out the edge of his form, a dark outline of a shape she'd come to know well.

She huffed, crossing her arms herself. "I'm seeing my friends."

He slipped by her, positioning himself between her and the door. "No." He said.

"What is your problem?" She whispered, not wanting to wake Kaede. She knew they would gang up on her. "I'm keeping my promise, I'm helping you out. Just let me see them."

"I'm not letting you see your stupid little boyfriend who tried to turn me in."

She tried to stomp her foot but winced in pain as soon as she moved it, muffling a scream. "Listen," she said through grit teeth. "I'm not going to lie and say I'm not worried about Hojou, he's… He's always been kind to me. But Sango... I've known her for a long time, okay? She has always been there for me, we have history. I don't want to go without at least seeing her one more time."

"She tried to turn me in too."

"Inuyasha!" She hissed.

"You'll see her when we've collected the shards and get back."

"And what if I don't? What if we come across a youkai that has a bunch of shards, and it's too strong for you and it kills me? Then how will I see her?"

He chuckled. It was low and dark, and it made Kagome shiver. "There is no 'too strong for me,'" He said.

"You are not the strongest thing in the world."

"I'm the strongest  _youkai_." The amusement was evident in his voice.

She felt an ache in her chest. He was being so stubborn, and she didn't think she'd be able to convince him. The idea that she might not ever get to see her best friend again was devastating. She needed to apologize, even if Sango couldn't really hear it, even if she never woke up again. Kagome tried to suppress the trembling of her jaw, tried to blink back the water that gathered in her eyes as she glared angrily up at Inuyasha. She felt her lip jut out despite her efforts, felt a tear slip down her cheek. She angrily rubbed at her eyes with her hand, wiping the traitorous tear away. She hated it, that her emotions were so out of her control. She hated it.

"Wh-what are you doing?" He asked.

"Nothing." She replied, wiping at her cheeks.

"Stop it." He said.

"Stop what?"

"Stop  _crying_."

She wanted to punch him. "I'm not crying."

"You are. Stop it!"

"You stop it!" She argued back. "Let me see my friends!"

He paused in the darkness, his outline solid and unyielding. And she knew then it was hopeless. She wasn't going to win, especially with her injured leg. It didn't matter what she did or what she said, she was helpless in this situation, just as she'd been helpless when attacked by the spider youkai, just as she'd been helpless when this whole thing started. She knew it didn't matter. She did.

Which is why she was so shocked when he uncrossed his arms and stepped off to the side.

"Fine," he said, his voice tight. "But no more crying after this. I can't stand your blubbering."

"You're such a jerk," she grumbled, reaching out once more to grip onto the door handle. She pushed it open, squinting into the dark room.

"You can't touch them. You'll undo all the work Kaede and I have done." He reached out and wrapped his hands around her arm, his grip tight. "Don't say I didn't warn you," he muttered before releasing her. His eyes followed her as she limped inside.

She shut the door behind her.

It was dark. Darker than the hallway had been. Darker than the meadow outside. She felt around the wall for a light switch and found nothing. "Great," she huffed as quietly as possible. She didn't want Inuyasha hearing anything with those ears of his. She imagined he would probably get some sort of twisted amusement out of it.

The only source of light in the room came from behind the curtains, backlit by the moon. She moved around the edge, keeping one hand on the wall to guide her way. She was surprised that the wall never ran into a corner. It was one giant circle. Finally reaching the curtain, she pulled the cord. It slipped up silently, pale light flooding the room.

There they lay, side-by-side. Eyes closed, faces pale. Still. Like death.

Kagome's hands trembled. She inched towards them until she stood at their feet, then dropped to her knees. Her fingers came up to cup over her mouth, trying to force back the wail she felt coming from deep inside. Her eyes blurred, the tears dripping heavily onto the wooden floor.

"I…" She whispered, trying to hold it together. "I'm so sorry…." She brought her arms down to wrap around her stomach in an attempt to rid herself of the pain that had settled there. It hurt. It hurt seeing them. She wanted to reach out and touch each face, to make sure that they were still alive. The urge was overwhelming. Her hand moved towards Sango, reaching for her cheek. If she could just touch her… If she could just get that proof that she was still alive…

She froze, her fingers shaking. What had Inuyasha warned her of, other than the fact that it was a terrible idea for her to see her friends in such a state? It was so simple, such an easy rule to follow.

 _You can't touch them_ , he had said.

 _You can't touch them_.

Such a simple rule, yet the hardest thing she could think possible at this moment. Slowly, she pulled her hand away. She bowed, her forehead touching cold, hard wood. Tears ran down her face, collecting at the tip of her nose before falling onto the floor.

"I'm sorry," she whispered again. She didn't know what else to say. Everything up until this point was Kagome's fault. She had dragged Sango back with her to the museum. She had allowed Sango to try and fight Inuyasha, despite knowing what he was.

Inhuman.

She had led Hojou on, too worried about what she might lose if he knew the things she had done to betray him, too selfish to stop and think that she would be shoving him into the midst of all the chaos happening around her.

She had allowed her friends to step into Kikyou's line of sight. And why? How was her own family any more precious than the lives of her friends? How was sacrificing their lives in any way acceptable? And Kohaku…

Kagome released it all, bowing there on the floor. The sobs overtook and wracked her body, it was too much to hold in. It hurt. Sango had always been there for her, down to the very last moments. She felt like such a terrible friend in comparison. It was all her fault.

Everything was her fault.

.

.

"I have packed everything that you will need for this trip," Kaede said. She dropped the large yellow bag at Kagome's feet. Inuyasha's mirror was strapped to the back, behind the shoulder straps, and her quiver and bow stuck out from the top. It was stuffed to the brim, too full for its size.

"There are clothes, healing herbs, emergency rations, and tea." Kaede continued. There was a sadness in her eyes that hadn't been there before. "Make sure you drink the tea every morning and every night. Promise me you will."

Kagome nodded, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. They stood on the porch, the night having just fallen moments ago. She felt like she'd been crying far too often lately, as if she were a leaky faucet. "I promise," she said.

"And your archery. Continue to practice daily. Two hundred if you can."

She nodded again, wiping at her eyes with her sleeve. She had been with Kaede only a short while, but the old woman had taken her in, had watched over her, taught her how to better rely on herself. It was hard to put into words all the things that Kaede had done for her. Simply saying thank you did not seem like enough to pay her back.

Kagome bowed deeply. She felt her hair fall over her shoulders. She stayed there, letting everything she felt pour out of her, hoping Kaede understood. Hands tenderly touched her shoulders. Kaede guided her upright before pulling her in for a hug.

"I do not know if you are truly a reincarnation of my sister, or if you are born under an unlucky star, growing with the jewel inside you. But no matter. To this old woman, you are family. You are a daughter to me." Her arms tightened. "Be safe, child. Return when you are done so that I may be at peace again."

Kaede smelled of pine and earth, like the forest after a rainstorm. Kagome inhaled deeply. Nodded. "For everything," she said, "I can never repay your kindness."

They parted, and Kagome picked up her pack and hauled it over her shoulders, wincing as the added weight made her leg ache. Inuyasha's mirror rested sturdy between the pack and her shoulders. She turned and limped her way towards the edge of the forest, where Inuyasha stood. His arms hung at his side, the bright red cloth of his fire rat coat standing out against the dark backdrop.

He had practically salivated when Kaede pulled the old, musty coat from the back of her closet. Kagome had watched, wide-eyed and shocked as he ripped the coat from Kaede's hands, his smile bigger than she'd ever seen before. She didn't understand what the big deal was, it was just a coat, and honestly, kind of ugly. It looked wrong, paired with the modern jeans hanging on his hips. When she had asked Kaede about it, she just smiled and told her to ask Inuyasha.

But no way was she going to do that, at least not yet. Not when he was still so obviously mad at her.

Inuyasha stayed silent as Kagome reached him, and continued to say nothing as he turned and headed into the forest.

She took in a shaky breath, knowing there was no going back from this. She wasn't quite prepared, but then, would she ever be? ...The answer was a resounding 'no.'

She took a step into the darkness. Hesitated. Turned to look for Kaede's comforting gaze one last time.

But she was gone.

"What are you waiting for?" His voice drifted through the trees and his hand reached out to grip her wrist, tugging her gently along behind him. She stepped gingerly, well aware of the roots and rocks ready and willing to trip her up. Just like they had tripped her the day before.

She shivered, remembering the spider youkai bearing down upon her, his eyes blinking in a bloodlusted fever. The cold was suddenly colder. She shivered.

"You scared of the dark?" He asked.

 _I'm scared of what's_ in  _the dark_ , she thought, trying to make him out. She couldn't see him at all, it was like his hand at her wrist dissolved into a wall of nothingness. She could tell him her thoughts, sure, but she'd shown him enough weakness over the past few days. "I'm not scared," she replied, then let out a yelp of surprise as he jerked her towards him. In one fluid movement he slipped his hands under her knees, lifting her onto his back.

"Hey, I said I'm not scared!" She repeated, pushing against his shoulders. It only caused him to squeeze her legs tighter against his sides.

"Shut up." He growled, "we won't get anywhere if I let you walk. You're slow, even for a human."

 _Jerk!_  She lifted her arm up to cuff him on the ear, but stopped mid-air. Her fingers curled into a fist before placing it back onto his shoulder. She counted to ten slowly in her head. They were seconds into their journey and he was already starting to drive her crazy.

She couldn't let him get to her. She had to remain calm and mature. Hitting him over the head for being an ass was not calm or mature at all. Plus, he still hated her, and hitting him wasn't going to change his attitude. And she wanted his attitude to change. Badley.

"Hang on." He mumbled as he crouched down, letting go of her legs. Kagome's stomach lurched into her throat when he jumped, and she gasped when his body jerked to the side. She clenched her thighs together, hanging on for dear life. It was different than before, when he had taken her onto his back and jumped up into the sky. This time the stars were hidden by the canopy of leaves, and the smooth leaping gave way to catching branches and avoiding giant trees.

Plus, without the moonlight, it was pitch black, giving her no warning when their direction changed.

Her eyes squeezed shut, arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders, knees pressing into his sides, hanging on for dear life. It was like the wooden roller coaster at a local amusement park, the one that had been built when it first opened a hundred years ago.

"Would you relax?" He asked. "I'm not going to kill us."

She let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding in. "How… How can you see where you're going?" She hated how shaky her voice sounded. She tried to loosen her grip a bit.

"Keh, I'm hanyou, our eyes can see almost perfectly in the dark."

"I- I can't see anything!" She cried as she was jerked to the side again.

He sighed, heavy and loud, before they started to ascend. Seconds later they broke through the canopy.

"There," he said. "Better?

Slowly Kagome opened her eyes. His hair was tangled and wild, and she could  _see_  it. She could see his back and her arms and his ears. She could see the treetops below them. Her gaze lifted up, up, up, into the deep, never-ending night sky. Here, the stars didn't just dot the sky, they littered it. It looked as if one of the gods had taken a handful of glitter and tossed it up, sparkling and twinkling and dashing, white trails popping up behind them and fading away just as quickly as they appeared.

"Oh," she breathed. Anything else she could have said sounded so lame in this moment.

"Those are the stars I remember," Inuyasha said, his hands back under her knees. "Not the pathetic ones back at your idiot friend's house."

"I always forget just how many there really are," she said, ignoring his jab, too dazzled by the display of such raw nature before her eyes.

Inuyasha said nothing for a long time. Was he just as dazzled as she was? Just as awed at how big the sky truly was?

He breathed in deep and let it out slow, his shoulders slumping just a bit. "I never forgot." He said. "All those years in my youth sleeping under them, they were like a blanket to me. Then, all those years trapped… Every time she let me out into the night I desperately tried to memorize each one. Impossible, huh?"

Kagome didn't dare answer. He was always so locked up inside himself, always such a mystery to her. She was kind of shocked he was revealing something so intimate about himself.

"Yeah," he answered his own question, "impossible. But I tried. I tried to memorize them and at the same time tried to forget that they were constantly changing. They're no longer the same stars they were back home."

"Ah, well," she started, unable to help herself, "some of them aren't. But some of them are."

"Hm,"

She wished she could see his expression, but it was hidden behind his hair. She wanted to know more. And this could be a chance to get him to open up a bit. "Inuyasha… Do you recognize any? Or any patterns in them?"

He paused. "Yeah."

"Can you point them out for me?" She held her breath. For a moment she thought he might actually do it. His hand moved slightly under her knee. But then his grip tightened, and he shook his head, as if getting rid of unwanted thoughts.

"We're wasting time." He said. "We need to hurry. I didn't bring you up here just to look at the stars."

Kagome bit at her lip. Shoot. She'd been so close. He was slipping through her fingers. "What else did you come up here for?" She asked.

"Pull out the shard."

She did as she was told, reaching under the collar of her shirt and pulling out the small glass bottle attached to the silver chain that sat around her neck. She lifted it up to her line of sight. It still shone that pretty pale color, although not as bright as it had been when Inuyasha had first plucked it from the youkai flesh.

"Do you feel the pull to it that Kaede was talking about?"

She nodded, then realized he couldn't see her. "Yes."

"Okay, put it away and concentrate on that same feeling, but in the distance. Can you do it?"

"I'll try." She said, dropping the vial back under her shirt and gazing out around her. The canopy of trees spread out as far in every direction as she could see. Dark mountains rose up in the distance, and the faint twinkle of made-made lights dotted the bases around them.

It took a bit at first. She closed her eyes again and tried to bury down the pull she felt for the shard in her necklace, tried to separate it from….

There. Straight ahead and off to the right a bit. It was faint, but it was there, calling out to her. She raised her hand, pointing out towards where she knew their next destination lay. "That way." She said.

"You sure?"

She scoffed. "Of course I'm sure!"

"I mean, you've never done this before. How can you know?"

She was going to cuff him, she swore it. But she pushed the impulse down. "I just know, okay? Can't you just trust me a little?"

His head whipped around, his eyes glaring at her over his shoulder. They looked pale in the starlight. "Of course I don't trust you."

Ugh, the urge to roll her eyes was almost overwhelming. She didn't, though. "Well then what the hell are we doing out here? Take me back to Kaede and take her instead!"

"Keh!" He scoffed. "That old hag can't feel the shards, she thought you were just as crazy as I did when you told me it was in the spider youkai." He frowned. "Besides, whether I like it or not, you're the only one who can get me out of my cage, so I'm stuck with you."

"Argh!" She dug her fingers into his shoulder, willing them to inflict at least a little pain. "You are such a jerk!"

"Whatever you say."

"I do say! Jerk! JERK!" She stuck her tongue out at him. But he only shook his head and looked back to the direction she had pointed him in.

"I'll stay close to the top of the trees where you can see better. I don't want you screaming and blubbering in my ear because it's kind of dark down there."

Her anger spiked again. He was so confusing. Did he care about her or not? Was he mad at her or not? He was insulting her one moment and doing things that seemed like he actually cared about her the next. What was his deal?

"Does it feel like we'll get there before daybreak?" He asked, oblivious to her animosity as he dropped back down under the canopy. He kept true to his word and stayed as high in the treetops as possible. It was still hard for her to see, but at least now she had a few seconds warning before a sudden change in direction.

"I don't know how to tell."

He didn't answer, but he did speed up. Kagome gripped tighter onto his shoulders and pressed her face into his back, watching the trees whip by in a blur of green and brown. It went on forever, under the branches, swiftly ducking, swinging, jumping.

Soon, the moonlight began to fade, dropping lower and lower behind the horizon. Kagome felt her stomach drop as Inuyasha quickly descended deeper into the forest, escaping the first glow of daybreak. She was relieved to find she could now see a little better under the thick foliage. It wasn't much, but it was enough.

"How much farther?" He asked.

She paused, concentrating. It felt close-ish, but she was still unsure of the exact distance. It sucked that her abilities didn't come easier to her. Inuyasha should have allowed her to spend more time with Kaede, honing her newfound abilities. A sigh escaped her lips, her shoulders slumping in defeat. "I don't know for sure. But we're closer than we were."

He grunted, slowing his movements down, ears twitching every few seconds. His head tipped down as his eyes raked across the forest floor.

What was he looking for? She wanted to ask, but didn't think she'd get anything other than another grunt. And what was the point of that?

He stopped, ears pointed towards a single spot. She felt his back expand and contract in quick, rapid succession. Curious, she peeked over his shoulder.

...Oh. He was sniffing.

She bit her lip, holding in the snicker that threatened to escape.  _Sniffing_. Like a dog. She wanted to ruffle his hair, like she would an actual canine, but he would probably find it demeaning.

His sniffing continued, his ears pointed. Kagome stayed as quiet and still as possible, until he huffed and dropped down onto the floor. It was a small clearing, much smaller than the clearing that spread out in front of Kaede's house. The ground was mostly dirt, dampened by the greenery surrounding it. Moss covered the roots that broke through the ground, and twigs and dead branches were scattered about.

"This will do," he said, allowing Kagome to slip from his back. "Can you see?"

She nodded. "We're sleeping here?"

"Yeah, is that a problem?"

"No, I just… No." She didn't want to complain, but if she was being honest, sleeping in such a place skeeved her out a little. She imagined a swarm of bugs crawling up her legs and shivered. She didn't want to be a burden, though. She had to suck it up.

"We've got a good hour until the light reaches us down here," he muttered. "Let's set up camp. After we eat I'll take a look at your leg." He started to pace around the edge of the clearing, gathering up the twigs and branches for a fire.

Kagome fidgeted, suddenly nervous. Sunlight meant Inuyasha would be thrust back into the mirror again, and that meant, come nightfall, she would have to kiss him out.

She hadn't kissed him in what seemed like forever. The last time had been in front of the shrine steps, up against the haori gate. She felt heat spread across her face, and she quickly looked down at her feet. The feel of his hands in her hair, the hard lines of his chest pressed against her fingers, his lips, his eyes, his arms…

 _No, no, no, no!_  she berated herself.  _Don't think about it! Don't think!_  But it was there, playing out behind her eyes. She squeezed her legs together, fighting off the pool of heat that gathered there. She prayed that sensitive dog nose wouldn't give her away.

Besides, the fight they'd had afterwards had been somewhat brutal. After that, after turning him over to Kikyou, even though she truly hadn't meant to do it, how could she kiss him again?

How could she?

She watched Inuyasha discretely through her lashes as he attempted to start a fire. She would have to just not think about it until she had to do it. She couldn't help the panicked thought that he might reject her, even though she knew he wouldn't - his longing to be outside the mirror was too great.

But still, she couldn't help but imagine him turning up his nose at her as she pressed her lips against his mirror.

Inuyasha was having a hard time getting the fire started. He cursed and threw rocks and sticks against the surrounding trees as each attempt failed. The corner of Kagome's mouth quirked up into a smile at his mini tantrum. She slipped the straps of her pack from her shoulders and opened the flap to dig through the contents. Surely, Kaede would have packed…. Ah-ha! A lighter!

She walked over to Inuyasha, dodging a stick as it flew past her knees. She knelt in front of him and rolled her eyes before holding up the modern lighting contraption. She smiled as his eyes widened, then narrowed. He swiped it from her hand, almost too fast to see.

The fire caught hold of the leaves and twigs, spreading quickly onto the thicker branches.

No, she wouldn't worry about the kiss she would inevitably have to inflict upon him. For now, she would concentrate on the fire and their dinner and sleep.

She'd worry about kissing him tomorrow.


	30. Bit By Every Agonizing Bit

Kagome

Kagome woke up, overheated and uncomfortable.

She lifted her head to look around, her vision blurry with sleep. The fire Inuyasha had built right before they'd gone to sleep was now made up of slow-burning embers, crackling as they continued to die out. The sleeping bag Kaede had packed for her was wrapped tightly around her body, proof that she'd been overly active in her sleep.

The day was bright and warm. The sun beat down on the small clearing, and that, along with the fire, was practically cooking her alive under all the layers. No wonder she felt so overheated.

 _How long was I out?_  She struggled to untangle her arms and pushed up with her hands, looking up into the trees for Inuyasha.

Sure enough, he was gone. Sucked back into the mirror. It lay a few feet from her, propped up against a tree. She couldn't see him in there. He was sleeping, probably. Did he feel the heat from the morning sun like she did? Or did the mirror suppress any discomfort like it had suppressed his hunger?

Slowly she untangled herself and stood from the sleeping bag, a sigh of relief escaped from between her lips as a breeze whipped through the small clearing. She lifted her hair up off her neck and let the air cool her off a bit.

No movement from the mirror, thank God. She didn't feel like explaining that she had to relieve herself. Inuyasha was so overbearing about everything. Slowly she limped around the fire and into the forest. She wanted to be far enough away that he wouldn't be able to just  _see_  her, but so he wouldn't be able to  _hear_  her either.

Moving far enough to ease her mind, she found a decent spot and let her mind wander. Just as she had last night, she pushed away the grief that threatened to overwhelm her.

Sango and Hojou's betrayal ran deep.

She had spent the last week grieving them, thinking they were dead. But now, with renewed hope they might survive, a new emotion appeared that warred with her grief: Anger.

And the anger was hard to suppress, try as though she might.

She was livid with Hojou. Livid. Their last conversation had been a mess. His fight against Inuyasha was explosive, and after, his relief for finding her alive and safe had muddled her initial anger with confusion and doubt as he'd kissed her. He had spent the totality of their relationship lying to her about who he was. And the lies didn't stop when arguing with her about turning Inuyasha in. He had even smiled at her for her stubbornness. How could he trick her so easily?

 _You know,_  he had said,  _I think I would be disappointed if you_ didn't  _feel that way about the situation. Your compassion is a big part of the reason I fell for you in the first place._

Yes. He had been lying. Planning on turning Inuyasha over to Kikyou for good, even then. Lying through his teeth and covering them with words of kindness. The side of Hojou that Kagome knew, the side she'd always known before he revealed who he really was… That side was gone. What replaced him was an unknown.

And right now, Kagome's life was made of far too many unknowns.

She made her way back to camp slowly, taking her time. The sun filtered through the treetops, dancing in between the shadow of the leaves and branches as they rustled in the wind. For a moment, she felt like she was back home, walking the paths behind her house, on her way to the Goshinboku tree. She used to race to it with Souta, laughing as she passed him to touch the familiar, comforting bark.

The corners of her mouth quirked at the thought of her brother. His tussle of brown hair, his green eyes, the way his laughter rang out through the woods as he ran to catch up to her.

...Was Inuyasha right? Would Kikyou spare her family after what they had done to her? It was hard for Kagome to think that the witch could still possibly be alive with the burns she had given her. But at this point, what could she do? Who could she trust to tell her the truth now except for Inuyasha?

 _He_  was honest to Kagome about what he was. What he wanted her for. She was fine with being a shard detector. Fine with being the only source of his freedom at the moment. She would take it over lies and deception. She would take being truthfully used to reach a goal, especially for one she wanted herself.

She wanted Kikyou gone.

And fine, her friends would probably never want to speak to her again, but she'd take them being alive and hating her over dead. Even Hojou, with all his secrets and falsehoods.

Kagome resolved to herself then, in the middle of the forest, the daylight sprinkling shattered patterns across her arms, that she would leave her old world behind and become what Inuyasha desperately needed her to be.

Hardened and efficient.

It was okay that he also hated her. It was okay that he was bitter and angry. She would take it and consume his anger, just like she was consuming her own. She imagined holding it inside of herself, a small flame that burned bright and never-ending. It would fuel her from now on. It would drive her forward.

She stepped over a small stream, bubbling over rocks and twigs, wincing as she put more of her weight that she wanted to on her injured leg.

She frowned.

As far into the early morning as he dared, Inuyasha had set up camp and then forced Kagome, exhausted and worn, to sit still while he checked over her leg. His voice had been gruff, but his hands had been incredibly gentle. She tried to ignore the blush that crept up her cheeks as she remembered his breath against her thigh, his claws gently prodding at her tender flesh as he closely inspected her healing wounds.

...What was wrong with her? She was already losing her resolve, and it only took a few seconds of thinking about Inuyasha to break her down again. She grit her teeth against the memory. What was the point in getting lost in him again? She had no idea what drove her intense, unavoidable lust for the jerk. He claimed it was not magic, but what else could it be? It wasn't normal.

Would she even be having these thoughts if that damn spider youkai had never attacked her? The only reason he was even touching her like that was to check her wounds, not to get into her panties.

Kagome rolled her eyes, shook her leg a bit to rid of its residue pain and continued on. Her fingers reached under her shirt to brush the small glass bottle that encased the single jewel shard. She could feel it pulsating, which Kaede had explained was her purification powers doing their job.

 _I have to remember_   _that there's nothing else but what I have to do. No thoughts about Inuyasha. No thoughts about Hojou and Sango's betrayal. Just focus on what I have to do._  Her wavering resolve solidified again.

 _I should probably try to sleep some more_ , she mused, especially since she and Inuyasha would be up all night moving towards the jewel shard.

"KAGOME!"

She froze, recognizing the anger and… was that fear? in Inuyasha's voice.

"KAGOME!"

She limped forward as quickly as possible, heart pounding in her chest, wincing heavily at the pain in her leg. Inuyasha was in trouble. Something was attacking him. It was Kikyou, it had to be! Her breath hitched in her throat as she limp-ran, desperate to get to him, desperate not to lose him.

He was the only one she had who was left, who was still with her. It didn't matter if he was by her side for his own, selfish reasons, she just didn't want to be alone.

She didn't want to be alone.

She burst through the thicket, stumbling out into the small clearing, eyes darting frantically, trying to take in any signs of danger.

But the clearing was calm and bright and undisturbed.

"What the  _fuck_?!" Inuyasha said. He was livid. His hands pressed against the mirror, which was sitting propped where she'd left it just moments ago. "Where the fuck did you go?!"

Kagome's mouth fell open. "I-I went to-" She paused, steeling herself. "Does it matter? What are you doing, yelling like that? You scared me!"

" _I_  scared  _you_? You were gone! I thought you'd gone off and died and I was trapped in this goddamn cage forever!" He slammed his fists against the glass. "And for what, so you could take a fucking stroll?"

She clenched her fists and grit her teeth. Her resolve wavered for a different reason this time. She could easily just walk off into the forest and hope to find her way to civilization. She could just leave him here, trapped in the mirror, a sitting duck for Kikyou to find… eventually.

She bit her tongue against the threat, stopping herself from uttering the words aloud. Instead she turned and limped over to her sleeping bag, slipping inside and turning away from Inuyasha and his stupid mirror. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of being able to look at her.

"Oi! I'm speaking to you!"

She wrenched the top of the bag away from her face and sat up, whipping around to glare daggers at him. "I had to pee, Inuyasha, okay? I. Had. To. PEE." And with that, she turned and flopped back down into her bedding. What a friggin'  _jerk_!

He didn't say anything for a while, which was fine by her. It meant she could stew in her anger in peace. After a while though, he cleared his throat, his mumbling words drifting through the air to reach her ears.

"Fine, but just… tell me next time."

She refused to acknowledge him. Luckily, he didn't say anything else to anger her, and after what seemed like forever, her angry, beating heart calmed. Her breathing evened out. She drifted back into another fitful sleep.

She awoke to him calling out to her again. Kagome rolled over, blinking into the falling dusk. It was already pretty dark out, and she could barely see past the treeline. Inuyasha was watching her from behind the glass.

"You up?" he asked.

She sat up and rubbed at her eyes. "I'm up." The fire had completely died out and it was significantly colder than it had been when she'd been up at mid-day. She stood from her bag and stretched.

"Hurry up and get me out of here," he said, "we're wasting time."

"Fine," she muttered, limping towards him and kneeling down in front of the mirror. She tried to push her nerves down, tried to harden herself against what would happen next.

 _It's just a kiss_. She leaned forward, glanced up to look at him. His gaze was hard and cold. He had shut himself off from her as well.

Closing her eyes, she pressed her lips to the glass. Her heart thumped wildly in her chest, feeling nothing but the cold, hard barrier in between them. But then he was there. His lips...

_His lips…._

He placed his hands on her shoulders as his arms were freed, and she leaned back as the rest of his body followed. She felt her cheeks flush, relishing in that intense pull she felt every time she kissed him. The heat she'd come to know so well pooled at her insides. A tremble started there, where the heat pooled. It shivered up her arms and ended in a gasp as her lips opened to allow him in.

It was soft, his kiss. Hesitant. She wanted more. Wanted to get lost in him, the urge to forget everything else and surrender to nothing but her desires were overwhelming.

 _You can't!_  She cried to herself.  _Stop it! STOP._

She pressed her lips together and pulled back, felt him back away from her as well. His hands left her shoulders, she heard him take in a deep breath.

"Sorry," she heard herself say before she could stop herself. "I'm not sure… I mean… I don't know why…" Her words trailed off. She felt like an idiot. She had practically given herself every pep talk she possibly could, and the desire her body felt still overwhelmed her. What was wrong with her? Why couldn't she control herself? She fought the urge to look up and him, and instead turned to her sleeping bag.

"I'll start packing up," she said, limping towards her pack.

"Oi, wait a sec," Inuyasha snapped, reaching out to grip her wrist.

She froze, hoped he didn't hear her sharp intake of breath. Slowly she looked up at him. "What?

"I have to check your leg first." He said, frowning down at her.

"It's fine," she said, trying to yank her arm out of his fingers.

"It's not fine, stupid, you're still limping. I have to keep checking it in case any more poison shows up. I have to make sure I got it all."

She hesitated. "Fine. Let me go so I can sit down." This time his grip loosened as she pulled her arm away. She limped over to the oversized log she'd sat on last night and pushed her leg out for easy access. He knelt down next to her and started with her ankle. Going over every inch of it, tracing the path the poison had made up her calf, through the blood veins in her thigh, up, up, up to her hip.

She bit back the moan that threatened to break free.

"What, does it hurt?"

She glanced down at him. His eyebrow was cocked, questioning, his golden eyes fixed on her. Could he see through her? Could he tell how hard she struggled to keep herself contained?

"I'm fine."

"Hm," he muttered, moving away from her. "It looks okay, I didn't find any lingering poison. You're probably in the clear, but I'll check again in the morning to make sure."

She nodded, began to push herself up on the log, but he was next to her suddenly, his hand on her shoulder pushing her back down.

"Stay. I'll pack."

"I can do it."

"Shut up and stay." He bit out. She watched him move quickly around the rude camp, packing her stuff away as dusk completely settled into night. The mirror he stored last. After only a minute or so he was back by her side, dropping the large pack down next to her. As she stood to shoulder the pack, he turned his back to her and knelt down, the implication obvious.

She hesitated, this time for too long. He turned to look at her over his shoulder, eyebrow raised.

"What's up?" he asked. "Let's go."

She moved towards him, her fingertips grazing across his skin, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Was it just her that felt the jolt of excitement every time they touched? Was it just her that struggled to keep from touching him more?

Was it just her?

He jumped.

They flew.

He kept to the treetops again, and with her direction they made their way towards the presence of the jewel shard, so far away yet growing stronger with each passing moment.

They made camp as the sun slowly began to rise over the horizon. Again, he placed her down and carefully checked her leg. He wouldn't let her lay down and sleep until he finished, grunting in satisfaction that her wound was still healing properly.

She slept throughout the day.

She dreamed Inuyasha was calling out to her, calling her name over and over. But when she awoke, she realized he was calling out to her because the sun was setting. Crawling out of her makeshift bed, she limped to his mirror again, steeling herself for another kiss, his eyes still unflinching.

Cold glass.

His lips.

Again, the undeniable urge that she had to give in. His lips, his hands, his chest pressed up against her. Her arms moved on their own, up around his shoulders. She wanted to melt into him.

_NO._

She pushed against him, hard. Turned her head to the side and pushed as hard as she could. He let go, taking a few steps back and cursing.

Kagome pushed it down. Down, down, down, until her shivers of desire turned into shivers of cold.

"S-Sorry," she said again, her hands trembling. Why? Why was it so hard to resist him? Thinking back to the other times, the times that she had given in so easily… "I'm sor-"

"Just," he interrupted, a harsh growl tumbling out with the words, "stop talking." His brows were furrowed together. He still avoided her gaze.

They set themselves to pack up camp. Inuyasha made a point to check her leg, and they were off.

The night flew by in almost-silence, the only interruptions her uttered directions and casual comments about the stars, about the night, about the jewel. But all she really wanted to tell him, all she really wanted to say was:  _Don't speak to me. Don't make this harder than it already is._

She kept her sorrow to herself.

The third morning she crashed, exhausted. Her shoulders were sore from carrying the pack and her head ached from all her tumultuous thoughts. The tea helped ease her to sleep, and again she dreamed of Inuyasha calling out to her.

Another sunset.

She knelt in front of the mirror. Slowly she closed her eyes, her lips waiting for his, her heart pounding nervously in her chest.

He emerged from the mirror, his lips on hers, his shoulders, his hands. His fingertips brushed against her arms, heat spreading everywhere he touched.

"Why?" She whispered into him. He growled back at her, pushing her back against the closest tree, his kiss hungry. Just as hungry as she was.

He wasn't spelling her to feel this way, he had told her as much. But then why? Why? Why did she feel like if she didn't have him the entirety that made up her very being would end?

This time it was Inuyasha that pulled away. He shoved himself away from the tree, breath hitched, aggravated fingers dragging through his hair. Kagome brought a shaking hand up to her mouth, still swollen from the onslaught of his lips. They tingled under her touch.

"Fuck, Kagome," he breathed, his voice rough. "This isn't normal." He started to pace back and forth, brows drawn in concentration.

"You said…" she took a deep breath. "Do you remember the first time I flew on your back? You spelled me to stay calm because of what was happening to my family."

He frowned, but nodded.

"Under the torii gate, you… you kissed me and…"

"I remember," he croaked out. She darted up to look into his eyes. They were that same dark gold, heavily layered in his own lust.

"You said you didn't spell me to  _feel_  this way around you-"

"I haven't!" He snapped.

"I know! I know, it just… It doesn't make sense to me either. You're the youkai, you would know more than I do."

He shook his head and went back to pacing. "It makes no sense. There  _are_  youkai who claim their women. You know, mark them as their own. That's the only time any sort of bond of a higher magnitude is formed. But this… This isn't normal. Not before the claiming, at least. Something else has to be going on." His feet stilled. " Kikyou, that bitch. If I had to guess, I'd say she has something to do with it."

Kagome nodded furiously in agreement.

"It can't continue. We have to control it." His eyes pinned her to where she stood. "No more of this. You have to kiss me out of the mirror, but it's bare minimum from here on out, you understand? We have to agree to work together. Otherwise we won't finish what we set out to do here."

Again, she nodded, willing the tears that had been gathering not to fall. He was right. They had to do it. If they were on the same page, she felt confident that they could re-focus themselves.

Without another word, she turned to the campsite and started to pack. Only a moment later he joined to help.

She kept her thoughts on their goal, even as she climbed on his back. Even as they jumped up into the air. She kept her focus on detecting the jewel. As the moon passed by overhead, she focused.

_Just stay focused._

She was so focused, in fact, that force of the jewel's presence smacked into her, like a brick wall. She felt like she'd been punched in the gut, her breath forcefully pushed from her lungs.

"What? Kagome what is it?" Inuyasha called over his shoulder. He stopped short on a branch, propelling her forward to lean too far over him. Their unbalanced weight caused the branch to break under them, and with a large  _crunch_ , they fell.

Kagome's stomach dropped out under her as branches and twigs whipped by, scratching at her arms and face. Inuyasha scrambled, cursing as they fell, to get ahold of another branch. His claws caught and they hung there, swaying back and forth from the force of the drop, Kagome's arms and legs wrapped tightly around him.

"Goddammit, Kagome," Inuyasha snapped.

"What?" She snapped back, feeling sick as she swayed, clinging to him.

"You sounded like someone punched you in the face, what happened?" He dropped again, this time controlled, onto the forest ground.

"The jewel. It's close by." She said.

His ears quirked her way. "How close?"

"Close. Like, right under us. Or almost."

He lowered himself down to release her. She slipped off his back but kept one hand on the sleeve of his fire-rat coat. It was pitch black. She couldn't see anything.

She heard him audibly sigh. "Here, give me the pack." He said, slipping a strap off her shoulder and tugging at it.

"Give me a second, I can't see." She slipped off the other strap and let him take it, heard the rustle of it settling on his back. His own hand replaced his coat, wrapping solid around hers. She wanted to yank it away on instinct, but then what? Stumble around until she fell and hit her head, that's what.

"Where's it coming from?"

She closed her eyes, concentrating. She felt the familiar tug of the jewel, felt the warmth of it pulling her towards it. She peered around in the darkness.

There. A faint glow, off to her right. She lifted her hand to point towards it. "There," she breathed. Slowly, Inuyasha led the way, pushing back branches and bushes to clear the path for her.

And there it was.

The pool was small, no more than a pond, really. Maybe 30 inches wide, the clear, still water glowed pinkish-purple, lighting up the pebbles and moss, the tiny little tadpoles and water-skimmers that inhabited it. The glow pulsated, the same beat as the one pressing against her chest did. The synced rhythm calmed her.

She let her breath out, all but collapsing into a pile next to the edge of the water.

"Is it there?" Inuyasha asked, a hint of annoyance threaded between his words.

"Can't you… see it?" She breathed, almost dumbfounded by the beauty of it. She looked up at him, his face visible in the glowing light. It softened his features, making him look more otherworldly than he already was.

"I mean, it's a puddle," he quipped.

"It's glowing." She brought her hand up to touch the one hidden under her shirt.

"I only see pebbles. It's dark down here, even for me." He frowned. "Are you sure there's no youkai around it? Youkai can be small too, you know."

Kagome shook her head. "No youkai, only the shard."

"Keh," he muttered. "What a letdown. I was expecting another fight."

She couldn't help an eye-roll before she reached out to it, her fingers dipping below the surface. The ripples she created in the water caused the glowing light to ripple as well, lighting up the bushes and trees around them. She gazed around, couldn't hold back the laughter that escaped her lips.

Inuyasha knelt down beside her. "What is it? What do you see?"

"It's beautiful. The whole area is glowing." Kagome felt the smile spread across her face. It looked like a Fairy playground. She could easily imagine them hopping across the small pond, wings fluttering at their back. For a moment she felt like a kid again.

There was a long pause before he spoke. "I wish… I wish I could see it," he said.

Kagome turned to look at his profile, pleased that she could make him out in the light cast from the jewel. She kept her breathing even, tried not to give anything away. Slowly, she reached out to touch his arm. She felt him stiffen under his coat.

"I wish you could see it too." She said, her words almost too soft for her to believe she said them. He turned and caught her gaze.

And so they sat, staring at each other. His eyes were a strange shade of purple under the jewels' glow. It felt like forever before he pulled away and stood up.

"Well, put it with the other one," he said, voice strained. "We've still got a few good hours to go before sunlight, we should keep moving until then."

Sighing, knowing his withdraw from her was for the best, she pulled out the glass bottle and uncorked the top, dropping the shard inside. She watched as they both pulsed, almost as if they were happy to see each other again. She stood and reached out to grab onto his coat again, the light fading back into a lessened glow as they settled back under her shirt.

"So?" He asked, impatiently. "Can you sense another one?"

Kagome closed her eyes and focused one more, feeling out for that same pull. She pointed ahead this time. "This one is closer. I mean, not  _close_ ," she corrected, "just  _closer_  than this one was."

He cleared his throat, but stayed where he stood. "Are you sure it's that way?" He asked, an underlying tone to his voice she hadn't heard before.

"Yes. Why?"

He let his breath out, heavy and slow. "Fuck. I was afraid you were going to say that."

She tugged at his sleeve. "What is it? Tell me."

"Wolves," the growl ripped from his throat, guttural and thick. A muscle tightened in his jaw.

"...Fucking Wolves."


	31. Grounded Mortality

Sango

Sound came roaring back first. It was a rushing in her ears, along with the splitting in her head. She was covered in sweat. She was drowning in it.

She breathed in deep and the air burned down her throat, like swallowing fire. The rushing noise slowly faded, replaced by a… ringing? Maybe? More like a bell. It chimed periodically, disorderly, like someone was simply holding onto it as they moved around, cleaning or organizing a room.

Slowly, Sango opened her eyes. Her lashes were all but glued together. She struggled to see through them.

She was on her back. She could feel the futon underneath her.

...She wasn't alone.

There was someone sitting beside her. She could feel whoever it was moving around, humming a tune she didn't recognize.

 _The humming…_  she thought, her mind already beginning to drift,  _It's nice._

She drifted back into unconsciousness.

.

.

More rushing in her ears, her head splitting open. Sweat poured from Sango's hairline, soaking her. She tried to move her head, a muffled groan falling between her lips as pain shot up her temples. The ring of the bell returned, small and light. Tinkering. She could hear the humming again, and now, a hand on her forehead.

The touch was light and soft, although the hands were calloused She tried to speak to whoever it was, but her mouth was strange, she couldn't get her tongue and lips to work properly. A voice shushed her.

She tried to open her eyes again. She could make out a shape through the haze that clouded her vision. Someone was leaning over her. The humming continued.

She tried desperately to focus her eyes, to see who was with her, but the pain was increasingly intolerable. She muffled a scream.

"There, there." A man's voice.

"H...Hojou?" She croaked, her tongue like ash in her throat.

"Sleep," he said, "you are not healed yet."

She didn't want to sleep, she had too many questions.

 _How am I still alive_?

But her eyelids were heavy, and the humming lulled her slowly back into unconsciousness.

.

.

She felt it gurgle up inside her - the vomit - well before the splitting pain retched her awake. She was pushed onto her side, her head rolling onto the hardwood floor before the putrid liquid coughed itself out of her stomach and onto the floor. The hands on her back held her steady until the vomit stopped, then slowly lowered her back onto the futon.

"Ugh," she muttered, the acidic aftertaste seeping into her tongue and dripping down the back of her throat.

"That's a good sign."

Sango opened her eyes. This time the haze had cleared enough for her to focus. She stared at the oak wood beams that ran across the ceiling, the soft light from the windows exposing the particles of dust dancing in the air. She blinked. Again. Her head throbbed. The light hurt her eyes. She took a deep breath, and raised her hand up to press against her temple, to try and get rid of the pain.

But her hand didn't move. It stayed limp and useless at her side. Furrowing her brows, Sango tried again.

Nothing.

She tried to wiggle her finger. Tried her toes. Nothing moved. Her heart started to race. No way. There was no way she could be-

"You're awake."

It was that same voice. The one she'd been hearing through the haze. Slowly she turned her head - Yes! It turned! - and her eyes fell on him.

Deep purple robes to match deep purple eyes. Jet black hair pulled into a low ponytail. He sat cross-legged next to her, his golden staff resting comfortably against his chest and shoulder. The bell at the end tinkled softly in the light breeze.

Sango couldn't breathe.

No way. No fucking way.

"You bastard." She was going to reach out and strangle him. " I'm going to-" she started, before realizing her arms still would not obey her.

The monk quirked his eyebrow. One corner of his lips turned up. "I do not think you are in a place to be making threats," he said, his voice even and calm.

"Why… why can't I move?" She gasped between coughs. Her throat was on fire. The taste of vomit still lingered on her tongue.

"You seem to be paralyzed," he said, as he twisted around and reached out behind him. He turned back to her with a cup in his hand, filled halfway with water. "It makes sense. To have lived through something so heinous - recovery will not be simple for you."

Panic rose up inside her. The monk had gripped her to him, held her in place while her brother tried to murder her. He reached out to grab her now, and she struggled in vain to move away. If she could just roll her body, even a little.

Tears sprang up in her eyes as his hand slid under her neck. They rolled, big and fat and wet down her cheeks.

His head cocked to the side. "You're crying. Are you in that much pain?"

"Get away from me." She croaked as fiercely as she could.

"Ah," he said kindly, as if he understood her then. "I will not harm you here, Slayer." True to his word, he lifted her head up and placed it gently into his lap, his legs folded underneath him. He placed the edge up the cup to her lips.

No. No, she couldn't drink. She wouldn't. It was poisoned, it had to be. She pressed her lips stubbornly together, felt the cold liquid spill down the side of her face. She kept her eyes locked on him.  _Do not think I will ever let my guard down,_  she thought bitterly. Despite the fact that her throat screamed for water, she would not drink.

He stared back at her, his lids lowered into sleepy slits. "Don't be a fool," he chided gently. She felt the tip of his finger run down her jaw, trying to coax it open. "Drink."

 _No_.

But her lips parted. Against her will, they parted. She fought to keep them closed, but it was no use. Her eyes now wide with fear and disbelief, she felt the water drip onto her tongue, felt it pour down her throat, cooling the burn that had ravaged her since she first woke.

Again, she struggled to move. But now her head would not obey her. Despite every attempt to do otherwise, her lips still opened and her throat greedily drank from the cup until it was all gone.

The monk leaned over to refill the cup before returning it to her lips. "Again," he said, and she obeyed. At least, her body did.

One the cup was drained again, he set it down to the side and raced her jawline with his finger. "Good girl," he said, "you are yours to govern again."

She immediately jerked her chin away from his finger. "Get off of me!" She said as forcefully as possible. She wished more than anything that she had her hiraikotsu with her. She wanted to drive it right between his eyes. To bash it into his skull. She wanted her fingers to move - just her fingers - so that she could grip onto anything and throw it at him.

"Do not be like that. You are still healing."

"Fuck you," she spat. "What did you do to me? Let me go." She caught the flash of his smile before it was gone.

"I am doing nothing. You cannot move because if you do, all the work to heal you will have been for naught."

Sango grit her teeth. "Why would you heal me? You tried to kill me."

This time his smile stayed on his face. "So I did." He placed his fingers on either sides of her temples, and started to hum.

"What are you doing?" she bit out. She recognized the tune.

"You must sleep now," he spoke low, almost a whisper. His humming continued.

"But…" she said, her vision started to blur at the edges. "Wait…"

"Sleep," he whispered.

She slept.

.

.

She woke to burning pain. Again, the monk was there, by her side. He forced her to drink the water, despite her struggling to resist. Time was meaningless to Sango, she could not count the days or weeks that passed. The monk was there every time she opened her eyes, humming the same tune, forcing on her the same water.

One evening she awoke to find him tearing apart bits of bread and piling them on a plate.

"What are you doing?" she croaked, her throat dry and swollen as it always was when she came-to from her slumber.

"It's time you start to eat. You can only sustain on Kaede's half-magic for so long." He picked up the water cup, as as he had done every time before, and lifted her head up to place on his lap. She watched his face, and turned her jaw when he tried to place the cup at her lips. She didn't know who Kaede was, but it didn't matter. What mattered was trying to figure out what was in store for her.

"What is Kikyou planning to do with me?" She asked, eyes peering into his violet ones, hoping to dissect his truth from his lies.

His head cocked to one side, his eyes quizzical. "Kikyou?" He asked.

"Yes. What does the bitch want from me? She already took my brother. Why didn't she leave me to die?"

Sango's last memory, after all, the last thing she saw before succumbing to her death was…

A stabbing in her back.

Looking over her shoulder in horror as her brother stood behind her, his murder weapon sticking out of her spine.

Hojou lying beside her, his head gashed open, stark white bone peeking out from split flesh.

Blood splattering from her mouth.

Kikyou's hands around Kagome's throat. Squeezing. Her mouth wide open in a silent scream.

Nothing had come from their plan but death. Sango's brother had tried to kill her. Hojou was most certainly dead. She remembered how he was in class, a sweet, caring boy. Genuine and kind. He had been nothing but nice to her and Kagome. He had been a friend. A bond she felt had strengthened the moment he had picked up the other line, when she realized he too was a slayer.

He was dead.

And Kagome… The years of friendship, the years of trust - to lose it all because Sango loved her, because she couldn't  _not_  help her friend… For Kagome to throw it all away, for her to ruin their chance of escape, her chance to free her family…

The anger boiled inside her, threatened to consume Sango whole. Kagome was certainly dead, because there was no way out of that room. There was no way for her to escape. With Inuyasha trapped in the mirror and Kikyou's hands around her frail neck…

Would Sango ever be able to forgive her friend, even in death?

No. The answer was a resounding  _no._

"There's much you do not know." The monk's calm voice did anything but calm her.

"Just kill me already," she spat. "I will do nothing for Kikyou. I will attempt to kill her every chance I get, and believe me monk, I will find my chance."

His expression didn't change, but she felt the light trace of his fingertip against her jaw, locking her head into place. Felt the edge of the cup pressed against her lips. Her eyes did not waver as she was forced to drink. She refused to show him the relief the cold water brought to her throat. She wouldn't give his pretty face the satisfaction.

"It is no wonder you come from a family of slayers," he said as she finished the water. He placed the cup down and picked up the plate of bread. "There is a fire inside of you that is required for the job." He pressed a piece of bread to her lips. Against her will she ate it. "I will answer your questions," he continued as he fed her. "I am not here on Kikyou's whim. In fact, she would end my life herself if she knew I was here."

Sango finished chewing the bread and swallowed. "What are you saying?"

He paused for a moment. She could practically see the gears turning in his head, plotting his next move.

"I have been in servitude for a long time. Longer than I ever thought possible before Kikyou and I crossed paths," he said. "Once I entered servitude, for many years I looked for a way out. But where Kikyou wields her magic, I have none."

 _Liar_. Her eyes darted to his hand, the same cloth covering his palm that she remembered back in the abandoned house. The same prayer beads wrapped around it, entwined between his fingers. She could almost still feel the force of the winds his hand had created, pulling her slowly towards it.

"Ah, this," he said, catching her thought. "Unfortunately, this magic is not mine. Believe it or not, I was once an ordinary monk. I cannot break the curse Kikyou has woven for me. My own hand sees to that. It's much the same as Inuyasha's mirror. His prison is one of entrapment. My prison is one of ever-approaching death."

"You're lying," she seethed.

"I'm not," he said with a shrug. "It matters not if you believe me right now, Slayer. I am only telling you this so you understand why I'm here, despite the danger for me." He pressed more bread to her lips, and she opened her mouth to eat it. "As I said before, I spent many years looking for a way out of the curse. But all these years, a chance never presented itself. I had all but given up hope until the doppelganger appeared. Until you three escaped from her clutches. And now that you are alive and recovering, I have seen my way out."

Sango felt the tears building in the corners of her eyes. Her body trembled on the inside. She felt sick to her stomach.

"Are you telling me," she whispered, enraged to even have to speak the words, "that Hojou and Kagome are still alive?"

He stared at her a long while. "Aye," he said, his gaze solid, "Your friends are still alive."

"How dare you," she breathed, like a punch to the gut. "How  _dare_  you." The tears overflowed, running down her face and soaking into her hair.

"Hush now," he whispered.

"No, you do  _not_  get to keep me captive and tell me my friends are alive." She said, hating every inch of him. She yearned to be able to rip his heart out, just like he was ripping hers apart now. "I saw them die. Hojou's head was split open. Kikyou strangled Kagome to death. I don't care what you do, or what tricks you are trying to pull to get me to do your bidding, but it will not work on  _me._  My friends are  _dead_." She felt him trace her jaw to release his hold on her head before moving gently out from under her.

"I know the trauma you have faced. Many have wilted under less pressure than you have found yourself in. In time, you will know that I tell the truth of your friends, so take the time to heal. We are lucky that Kikyou has been so badly injured. In many ways worse than you have been. She still has not made the progress you have."

"If she's so weak, and you're enslaved by her, why don't you kill her now, while she's wounded?"

"I cannot. Despite her body in disarray her spell has held strong. If I move to physically harm her I will cease to exist."

No. He was lying. It was all lies. Kagome was not alive. Hojou was not alive. Sango was barely alive herself, captive here, paralyzed, a pawn in the monk's sick game. She would not listen to what he said. She refused.

"I will not listen anymore," she said. "I will find a way to free myself from here. I will find a way, and I will kill you. I will kill Kikyou. I will take Inuyasha's mirror and smash it into impossibly small pieces, trapping him forever. Mark my words, monk," she seethed, "I am coming for you, and I will make you suffer for it."

He was quiet for a moment, his expression unreadable.

"I would expect nothing less, Slayer," he finally said," but now it's time to sleep."

He started to hum.

Her vision blurred. She felt herself drifting, her eyelids closing, and she succumbed once more to nothingness.


	32. Here There Be Wolves

Inuyasha

There she stood, as if mocking him, finger pointed straight across the invisible, but very potent border, and deep into Wolf territory. Inuyasha fought the urge to yank her hand away, flip her onto his back and take off running in the opposite direction.

Kagome, however, blinked up at him, unfazed. Or unaware. Whichever.

"Wolves?" She asked, her grip loosening on his fire-rat coat. He saw her smile in the darkness, relief evident on her face. "Thank god. I thought you were going to say a youkai was headed our way. Wolves are no problem for you." She took a step forward.

"Oi, where are you going?" he snapped, fisting her shirt in his hands and pulling her back towards him.

"I have to go to the bathroom," she said, a twist of accusation in her voice he didn't like very much. "I won't go far, it's too dark out."

"Nope. Not that way."

She turned to him then, her brows furrowing together. "Why?"

He didn't want to say why, she'd just have to take his word for it. "Don't you sense shards in any other direction?"

She paused. Her suspicious gaze caused him to fidget in place, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

"No…" She replied slowly. Accusingly. "Inuyasha, is there something you're not telling me?"

"Keh," he said, avoiding her eyes. It was easy since it was so dark on the forest floor, she wasn't quite looking  _at_  him, more like  _around_  him. "It's none of your concern."

Her head jerked back in shock. "You're kidding me, right? This whole ordeal we've found ourselves in  _is my concern_ ," she said, hands fisting at her sides. "Finding the jewel shards? My concern. Getting the mirror spell broken? My concern. Making sure everyone I care about survives all this… this  _shit_  I've stirred up for them?  _My. Concern._ " her chest heaved in frustration.

Inuyasha took a step back, shocked she was willing to argue the fact when before she would have just kept quiet. ...Probably.

 **Hmmm,**  purred his youkai,  **she's starting to stand up for herself. How very youkai of her, don't you think?**  Just like every other time, he pushed it down.

"It's not just wolves," he had to admit, because he couldn't fucking kid himself - she was right. What good would it do to keep it from her? They'd have to pass into Wolf territory eventually. He'd have to explain it to her then, dammit.

"So it  _is_  a youkai thing." She guessed.

"Of  _course_  it's a youkai thing, idiot. It's  _always_  a youkai thing. I told you, back when we escaped from the museum, remember? Youkai are  _everywhere_."

"But.." she said, struggling to grasp what he thought was an easy concept, "I mean, are the Wolf youkai  _that_  strong?"

Inuyasha grit his teeth together. "Of course they're strong."

"Stronger than you, though?"

He cocked an eyebrow down at her, half surprised she took that much stock in his abilities. "Keh," he said, feeling heat spread over his cheeks, "of course not stronger than me."

"You destroyed the spider youkai so easily. What's different about the Wolves?"

"Listen," he bit out, "I'm not going to pretend like it's got everything to do with strength. I'm not welcome in the Wolf youkai territory. They've lived in this part of the woods for centuries. We have…" he took in a deep breath, "... _history_." He watched realization dawn across her face.

"Oh," she whispered.

He frowned. "Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Her nod was slow and deliberate. "How could I forget?" She said. She stepped close and grabbed his sleeve. "It was then, you know… when you first told me… that was the moment I knew I could never turn you over to Kikyou."

Inuyasha swallowed the lump in his throat. He didn't do well with soft, human emotions. He struggled to react the way he should to her kindness. "Just… don't think about it," he said. His words were lame. Raw and throaty.

"Of course I think about it. I think about it almost every day. How she made you track down youkai, even peaceful ones, and… and rip…" her voice wavered, as if she couldn't bring herself to finish. He didn't blame her. "It haunts me in my sleep. I can't even imagine how you deal with it in yours."

What could he say? Nothing. Each murder was burned into his retinas, each limp, hollowed-out body he could still feel in the palm of his hand. The despair was turbulent, a swelling inside him that he had to constantly push down and lock up, just like he did with his fervid cravings, just like he did with his youkai.

"Inuyasha, this shard is the only one I can sense right now. But we can just go a different direction, and maybe I'll pick up on another location…?"

"That's ridiculous," he spat, an attempt to stop the swell of sadness threatening to break through his self-control. "Of course we have to go get it."

"But-" she started.

"Shut up," he snarled. He placed a hand on her back and gave her a shove - as gently as he could - in the opposite direction of the Wolf border. "Do your business and we'll get going."

"No need to push me," she said.

He didn't answer. He was too busy warring with himself.

**Only feet away and I can already smell the old blood you've spilt. It's soaked into the earth.**

_Fuck you_.

**Don't pretend you'll be able to contain yourself, so close to the Wolves. They bring out the best of you.**

_Shut up. Kikyou has no control over me anymore. I won't be killing anyone._

**It's inevitable, and you know it. We don't need Kikyou to have fun, you can't run from who you really-**

"Okay, I'm ready." Her voice broke through his youkai, sent it scurrying back into the depths of his consciousness. He didn't know how that worked, but he was fucking relieved that it did. He breathed deep as she stumbled towards him in the darkness. Mixed in with the scent of the earth and trees and shrubbery was the faint tint of cherry blossoms and vanilla. He tried to keep ahold of the sensation her scent gave him, proof of his ability to feel something,  _anything_  other than anger and pain and sick glee at the hands of his ever-encroaching youkai.

He guided her hands to his back as he crouched down to let her on, then jumped up to the nearest branch, his eyes searching for the clearest way up, actively avoiding as many whip-thin branches as possible. The moon was slowly receding in the night sky.

 _Smarter to stay and camp, or continue on until morning?_  He mused, gazing ahead towards the middle of Wolf territory.

Their head council was located in the center of the territory, where the hills swelled into a mountainous cluster, a stringing maze of hollowed caves leading to the innermost - a large, domed cavern. Inuyasha knew those caves by memory, his recollection smeared by Kikyou's magic forcing his full youkai out from under his skin. His claws sharp and stained red, his fangs dripping with his most recent kill. And the wolves, scurrying about under him, squeezing into any small crevice they could find, terrified and already in mourning for those they would be losing up to unavoidable sacrifice that night.

"Hey, where's your head right now?"

His ears twitched towards her, wrenched back from his thoughts. "Just wondering what the best course of action is," he half-lied. "We could make camp here, but we'd lose half the night resting. Probably best to find an abandoned outpost, stay there for the night." He took her silence as agreement.

Once they crossed the border, there would be no hope of avoiding the wolves. Eventually a pack would come across their path, and then what?

 _I'll have to fucking keep Kagome out of trouble, that's what_. Protecting her wasn't just picking her up and putting her into the high branches of a tree. If any wolf pack leaders -assholes, really - who were always youkai, were traveling with the pack, they'd be in for bigger trouble.

It would mean he'd have to kill again.

What choice did he have? Kagome was the only useful secret he had right now, and putting her in any more danger than needed was not going to happen. Inuyasha shuddered to think if the Wolf youkai discovered her weird talent for finding the jewel shards. They would definitely want to use her for the same goal, and if they didn't manage to outright kill Inuyasha, he'd just be sucked back into the mirror until Kikyou eventually tracked him down, which could in theory be centuries if she wished it, the bitch. And once again his only freedom would be at her whim.

He leapt across the border, maneuvering faster through the treetops than he usually did. He kept his nose sharp, tracking for old and new scents of any wolf packs, keeping a detailed map in his head as he moved. The flat, forested landscape changed slowly to hillsides, swelling up and down as he continued his tracking, as the moon slowly lowered towards the horizon.

The best discovery for the night would be an abandoned cave, one used centuries ago when the Wolves laid their sights on acquiring land for their ever-growing numbers, spreading themselves out to stake added territory for themselves. Inuyasha remembered that war: it was bloody and brutal, and he had been forced to jump in the middle and cause deaths on both sides. Kikyou was, after all, unbiased in her hatred towards all youkai, and condemned their deaths no matter their political youkai ideals. A youkai war was just another excuse to slaughter more of them.

The abandoned outposts probably hadn't been used in a long time. After the Wolf war, it had been mainly peaceful.

Just as the threat of the sun began to worry him, Inuyasha stumbled across one.

He almost missed it, actually.

The rolling hills had slowly changed to a more mountainous region, and this cave in particular was buried in shrubbery and fallen rocks, halfway up a sloping cliffside. He would have jumped right on by if he hadn't caught the faint sound of crumbling pebbles falling back into it

Inuyasha dropped to the ground and shrugged a sleepy Kagome from his back. She yawned and blinked a few times, her eyes searching around the pineneedle-laden floor.

"Is this where we're camping?" She asked, slowly easing the pack off her shoulders.

"In here," he said, kicking at the mouth to the cave. The rocks fell through, rolling down the shallow incline and into the hollowed cavern.

"It's safe?"

"Keh, of course," he replied, picking up her pack and stepping down into the mouth. "No one has been in here for a hundred years, maybe more."

She whistled low, impressed. "That's a long time."

"Come on," he reached out a hand for her to take and helped her step inside. Her lead her in, the dawn not yet reaching into its' depths for her to be able to see her own way.

The ceiling was just high enough for him to stand, but not very wide, about five feet or so he guessed. He couldn't help the curl of satisfaction that licked through him; the cave went far back enough, at least, that the strong sunlight wouldn't penetrate it. For the first time in a long time he could spend the whole day sleeping outside of his cage.

"It'll do," he said, dropping the pack. "We'll camp here until nightfall." He turned to Kagome, who was reaching for her sleeping bag as he spoke. "Make sure you sleep well, we'll be pushing hard tomorrow."

She only nodded, her movements robotic as she made herself comfortable.

Inuyasha took his mirror and leaned it up against the back of the cave, then moved as close as he dare to the mouth, which wasn't as close as he would have liked. If he was lucky enough, he'd get to watch as dawn slowly turned to day, safely from the darkness of the cave.

"What about you?" Kagome's drowsy voice drifted to his ears. Her feet shuffled at the bottom of her sleeping bag, inches from where Inuyasha sat. "Will you sleep?"

How could he? How many chances would he get to watch the air turn, as if he were naturally free himself?

"Keh," he replied softly, "I'll keep watch for a while. Just in case."

"M'kay…" the word drifted off gradually, and he listened as her breathing slowed to an even, restful pattern.

His eyes stayed locked to the world outside the cave, the small hole that he was allowed, anyway. His ears twitched back and forth as the forrest's day-creatures came to life. Every few seconds one would scuttle quickly across the mouth of the cave, allowing him to catch just a glimpse. He had an unexplainable urge to chase after one and hold it in his hand. They always had amazingly soft fur, he could remember catching and releasing them as a child, when he had all the freedom in the world.

_Keh, too much freedom, probably._

The early morning noise of the forest calmed him, he could feel his breathing match Kagome's peaceful one as his eyelids drooped heavily down. He grunted in protest, trying to stay awake, to watch more of the daylight from the safety of the cave, but he felt like he could no longer hold his head up. The events of last night's travel had caught up to him. He laid back onto the dirt, in between the giant pack and Kagome's sleeping lump under her bag. The tips of his ears brushed against something soft. He tilted his chin up to see the white, fluffy pillow that she insisted she sleep with.

 _Keh, what, she fell asleep so fast she forgot to lay on it?_  He reached out and carefully hooked a finger over the top of her bag. He pulled it down slowly, just enough to see the same pillow cradling her own head.

 _She has another one?_  He looked back at the one she'd left out for him. Why'd she bother? It's not like he hadn't spent his whole life sleeping without pillows, first in the forest and then inside the mirror. Using pillows was such a weak,  _human_  thing.

He reached out to poke at it with his fingers. It was soft under his touch. With a glance towards Kagome, just to make sure she was still asleep, he tentatively bent his head down and inhaled.

...Fuck, it smelled like her. That same vanilla and cherry blossom scent that he'd grown to associate with her  _stupid_  face. ...Well, not  _stupid_ , it was  _kind_  of a nice face.

 _You can admit that she's not ugly_ , he growled to himself, clenching his jaw and pushing the offending lump of fabric away from his head. He rolled onto his back and rested his head on his hands instead, and focused on the ataractic sounds around him.

Slowly, slowly, he drifted to sleep.

.

.

 _He signed, inhaling deep. He was laying in a field of vine-threaded, white, orchid-like flowers, and they smelled_ fantastic.  _His ears flicked atop his head, hearing soft whispering he could barely make out. The words traveled in the breeze as it brushed across his skin. The sun was low, reflecting off the wings of hundreds of tiny insects, all fluttering lazily across the field._

_He was warm, as if he'd been laying out there for hours. His eyes were heavy, drowsy from the sleep he was awaking from._

" _Inuyasha," the wind whispered. "Inuyasha…"_

_He grunted and rolled to his side, his arms wrapped around something soft. There was no one in the field with him, but he could feel it in his arms, a warm body, molding perfectly to his own._

"Inuyasha…"  _The wind was more urgent this time, and something inside of him_  shifted.

She was wrapped up in his arms, the curve of her back pressed up against his chest her legs entwined with his. Her head was pressed up under his chin, their fingers twisted together. Groggily, Inuyasha grunted and pulled her closer to him. It had been so long since he slept so comfortably. He wanted just a few more minutes, just a little more time to sleep, wrapped up and serene.

"Do you hear that?" she whispered.

"Hear what?" he mumbled.

"Inuyasha, something's coming." Her words were hushed but urgent, he could smell her fear. His eyes opened.

He reared back.

 _Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck!_  What the hell was his problem, getting all comfortable and cuddling up next to Kagome like that? Fuck, he hadn't even realized he was doing it. His brain was groggy, like he was still coming out of his dream.

She sat up with him, eyes wide and sacred. "Don't you hear it?" she asked, seemingly unconcerned that she'd been in his arms.

No, he hadn't heard 'it,' goddammit, and he wasn't sure how it was possible, either. He'd spent his whole life sleeping with one eye open, his ears on high alert. Nothing could have possibly snuck up on them without him knowing it.

"I think it's-" her worried voice continued.

"Shut up," he snapped, his ears now sharp and wired. His brow furrowed together as he sniffed the air. The sun was on it's decent, Inuyasha could tell by the shadows cast on the floor of the cave. His eyes widened as he caught a whiff of it - wet, thick undercoat, dried mud and decaying teeth. He could hear soft pads treading carefully across the leaf-and-pine-needle-covered ground.

 **Here they come** , his youkai salivated, emerging from within.

"Get up," Inuyasha demanded, grabbing Kagome by the arm and pulling her out of the sleeping bag. She yelped as he shoved her behind him. "Be quiet."

"I-is it a youkai?" She whispered. He could feel her trembling at his back.

"I said be quiet," he snapped, crouching low to the ground.

Slowly he came into view. Bright, yellow eyes, a narrow, pointed snout, long thin legs attached to a lithe body. Gray and brown fur sprouted from every inch of his skin, thicker up by his neck and around his pointed ears.

He was alone. Inuyasha knew by his smell.

He had to die.

"Stay where you are, Kagome" Inuyasha hissed, taking a slow, small step forward.

The wolf's eyes stayed trained on him. His lips pulled back into a snarl, showing stark white fangs protruding from deep black gums.

Inuyasha's claws lengthened in preparation for his moment to strike.  **Yes** , his youkai rejoiced,  **yes, rip his throat out.**  It made him sick to his stomach, but he allowed the eager words to seep in, to make what he was about to do easier. Because he agreed with his youkai. A seeker wolf would immediately head back to inform its leader's of trespassers. A few wolves Inuyasha could handle, but an entire army, with youkai thrown in - he'd be dead before he could call out to warn Kagome they were coming. He couldn't let the seeker return.

His first murder free from Kikyou's spelled influence.

The seeker wolf lunged, drool splattering across the floor as he snarled, jaws wide, ready to tear into Inuyasha's face.

 **Now.**  He thrust out his left arm and caught the wolf by his neck, felt his sharp claws puncture through the vulnerable skin, felt the wolf jerk in his hands as his warm blood spilled in thick rivets down his fingers and drip, drip, dripped onto the ground.

"No!" Kagome shrieked. Inuyasha jerked his head towards her, struggling to fight off the red that hinged around the edges of his vision. She was pressed up against the very back of the cave wall, one hand covering her mouth, eyes wide in horror. At some point she had pulled out her bow and an arrow, and it hung limp in her other hand. Goddammit, he'd told her to stay put. Bitch never fucking did as she was told.

"No  _what_?" he growled.

"Don't kill him, you don't have-"

"What the fuck do you think he's going to do? It's a fucking seeker, it will run back to master and tell them exactly where we are. What the hell are we going to accomplish then?"

"But-"

"But  _nothing_ ," he seethed, "I'm keeping you alive. This is how it's done." and with that, with his youkai laughing gleefully in his ear, Inuyasha reached his right hand around the the back of the wolf's head and wrapped his fingers around his snout. Without blinking, his gaze set on Kagome, he wrenched his head around, too quick for her eyes to follow, until he felt that satisfying  _crunch_  he knew so well.

His body went limp in his arms.

The tears welled up and fell in fat droplets down Kagome's face.

The sickness Inuyasha felt tumbled inside him, both mixing and combative with the elation of his youkai.  **You did it. You did it. You did what you were meant to do!**

"Inuyasha…" Kagome whispered.

"Say it!" he roared, dropping the listless body on the ground, watching as she winced from the sound it made colliding with the earth, his youkai laughing at her fear. She still held the bow and arrow. If he pressed forward, would she use it on him? "Say it," he repeated, stepping towards her. "I'm a monster. A murderer." he took another step. " _Say it_!"

"I won't!" She cried, dropping her weapon and taking a step forward herself. Her bravery stunned him, cleared his anger for just a moment.

"You're scared of me," he accused, yet suddenly unsure.

"I'm not scared of you, you  _idiot_ , I'm scared of who you could  _become_ ," she clarified, taking another careful step. "I don't want you to fall back into what you were, Inuyasha, before I pulled you out of the mirror. Remember? I don't want you to become what Kikyou made you."

"Kikyou only brought out what's inside of me. It's who I really am," he spat.

"That's ridiculous. You're not the darkest parts of who you could  _become_."

"Of course I am! My youkai is a part of me. It's not a subconscious like you humans have, it's a real, living thing that is  _constantly_  trying to break free. Even now, it speaks to me. It  _says_  things-"

"What's it saying now?"

"You don't- I can't-"

"Inuyasha, what's it saying to you?"

" _It's telling me to rip your fucking throat out, you fool_." he raged, combating against it. "It just got a taste of fresh blood, and it wants more. And here you stand, dropping the only weapon you have to protect yourself."

"Yeah? Well it's just as stupid as you say I am if it thinks I'm scared of it - of  _you_!" she took another step. Another. "There's no way that you'll follow through with what your youkai wants, because it could have just let me be eaten by the spider youkai. You could have just left my friends to die. You could have just stepped into your mirror and never thought about what you really want - your freedom - ever again. You want to be a good person… you  _are_  a good person! And if you weren't such a freaking  _idiot_ , you'd be able to see that!"

He felt it then, her touch.

He looked down, eyes wide. Her hand was holding his, her fingers wrapped gently around his own. When had she gotten close enough to touch him? He shuddered against that warmth. So tiny, touching such a small part of his skin, yet he could feel it, spreading up through his fingers, his wrist, his arms… his chest constricted, and somehow, the ranting youkai that had been in the forefront of his mind was more like a whisper.

"I'm  _not_  scared," she repeated, her voice gentle, "and I don't want you to lose yourself in what you have to do to protect me, and to protect yourself! I know you had a reason, and I'm sorry I reacted the way I did, I don't fully- I don't fully understand how the wolf youkai and the wolves operate here. I know you have reasons for what you do, so thank you.  _Thank you_  for protecting me."

Inuyasha let his breath out long and deep, reveling in the tranquility of her presence. How was it possible that a simple touch from her could calm him so quickly? How did her words - words that he was increasingly starting to believe were genuine - penetrate and all but eradicate his youkai?

 _Don't let go_. The thought spread through him, a yearning that was, somehow, different than the all-consuming lust he felt every time she had touched him before.

"Explain it to me," she urged softly, "why you had to kill him?"

"It was a seeker," he said, hating the way the thickness of his throat revealed itself in his words. "Seekers are specific wolves sent to wander the border of their territory, and report back any intruder breaches. We can't have them knowing we're here, Kagome. They will send everything they have at us. They know me here. They want me dead, and with damn good cause, too. And I can't - I don't think I'd be able to get you out alive."

"Okay. It's okay," she murmured, taking a final step to him. He froze as her hand left his fingers and trailed up his arm, as she brought her other hand up to meet together around his neck and pulled him into a hug. It was then that he realized he was trembling.

"It's okay," she repeated. "Thank you for protecting me." She pulled away from him.

 _Don't let go._  He could already feel the warmth her body left behind slowly fade away.

"I'm assuming we can't leave the body here," she said, hands on her hips. She looked weary, but determined. "How do we cover our tracks?"


	33. Renewed Solidarity

Sango

Time went by.

Impossibly slow or incredibly fast? Sango had lost all sense of it. The monk insisted that she was safe, that Hojou was nearby, but Sango had no proof of his words. Every time her conscious surfaced, every time she became aware of her surroundings, the monk was there. Humming the same tune, giving her small sips of water. Sometimes he spoke. Sometimes he was silent.

Sango took every moment she could to watch him.

She was desperate for information, for anything that might help her when she was finally able to move again -  _if_  - she were able to move again. She was becoming increasingly frustrated that the monk's face was a mask. The only emotion he spared was a small smile of amusement every once in a while, which in and of itself was incredibly frustrating.

His touch was gentle. The few times he smiled was gentle.  _If he were just someone I'd met randomly on the street… Would I…?_

Stockholm syndrome was a thing. Sango knew of it well. She'd been trained on it. She knew her thoughts were turning traitorously against her. She knew it the first time she dared to think he was 'nice.' And just like the first time she had the traitorous thought, she shoved it down.

She couldn't afford to feel anything other than anger. Quiet, calm, calculated anger.

"Your mind is racing again," the monk said. "It's easily read on your face."

"I have nothing to do but think," she replied.

"You will move again one day, Slayer."

Sango frowned. "So you keep telling me."

"The old woman has seen to that. You were far more injured than your companion. You are just taking longer to put back together again."

Hojou, he meant. She turned her head, unwilling to look at him. "Again, I've seen nothing to prove that what you're saying is true. All I see when I wake up is this room. The only person I see is you."

His elongated pause caused her to face him again. His lips were curled up in that same damn smile. His head tilted back slightly, and he laughed.

It wasn't a big laugh. It was soft, just as soft as his spoken words. But it was genuine, more so than the smiles he'd shown her so far.

"Yes, very true. You're smart to question what I say to you. Sorry," he added, once he caught the irritation on her face, "it is just very refreshing, to speak to you as I have been able to so far. It has taken me by surprise if I am honest. I had almost forgotten over the years what regular conversation is like, free from Kikyou's listening ear."

"You call this regular conversation?" she asked.

"Amusing, I know," he admitted. "But you're correct, you are taking a very long time to heal. It must be fate that you brought it up since I have a present for you that will help."

"I don't want anything from you," she spat.

"And I understand why. I believe that this, however, will cause you to reconsider." he reached into his pocket, the bells on the end of his staff tinkering along with his movements.

It was pinched between his thumb and index finger, a small shard of glass. It was a dull pink color, like Himalayan rock salt she'd seen in fancier restaurants. But so what, it was just a piece of glass, what could she possibly want with that?

"By the look on your face, I can safely assume you do not recognize the jewel."

"Jewel?" she asked.

"I'm surprised the hanyou did not inform you of it. This jewel is why he and your friend were so desperate to leave this place before you healed."

It clicked then. She remembered the first night she'd met Inuyasha, how Kagome had convinced her to stay in the museum after-hours, how she had pulled him out of the mirror… How his hunger after so many years locked up in the mirror had caused him to double over in pain. And then the explanation, sitting outside of the fast food joint, Inuyasha finishing the last of his mountain of burgers and fries, he and Kagome explaining the story…

Her eyes widened.

"This is it?" she breathed, "this is the jewel that was ripped from Kagome's side?"

"The Shikon no Tama. You have heard of it, then. Yes, it is the same that was ripped from your friends' side. Although," he said, sighing heavily and sitting back onto his heels, "it is just a piece."

" _You_  ripped it from her side," she corrected, pinning her gaze to his own. Bastard wasn't going to try and brush his actions off like they were nothing and get away with it. She watched as his smile turned sad. Or… what is just her imagination?

"Ah," he finally replied, "another act to atone for, one of the many, I'm afraid. When Kikyou demands actions from me I must obey."

"Why? Just tell the bitch no."

"I cannot."

"Why?"

His mouth returned to its habitual, straight line, his expression masked once more. "Slayer, we have discussed this already. You know the answer."

 _Just trying to catch you in one of your lies_ , she thought, not daring to give away her tactics out loud. She clenched her teeth against the urge to say it. He knew she was perceptive, but there was a chance he wasn't sure  _how_  perceptive she could really be, and just as her father had trained her to for seventeen years, she wasn't about to reveal any information she didn't have to.

"I have no use for the jewel," she finally said, purposely directing the subject back to the shard, "What am I going to do with a useless piece of rock?"

The monk's head tilted to the side. "Didn't the hanyou tell you what it can do?"

"He told me he can use it to help him get rid of Kikyou, but details aren't his strong point."

"He was correct. However, the Shikon no Tama does much more than that. This very shard, in fact, is going to speed up your healing process." he paused, watching her for any change in her expression, probably. "I am sorry I could not bring it to you sooner. It took a bit to track this piece down. It's not easy to do, I'm afraid."

"I don't want it."

"Slayer, it could take you ages to heal. You may be an old woman before you walk again  _if_  you walk again. Do not waste your youth due to your refusal of this gift."

"I don't believe you."

His lips pressed together, the only sign of his annoyance. A spark lit within her; pride that she could bother him so.

"You do not have to believe me. Not yet." He moved then, his hands lifting her head up and his knees slipping under.

"Don't touch me!"

"Hush. When you wake up, you will feel better."

"No, don't!" She tried with all her might to struggle against him, but her body lay still, useless and defeated.

"N-no…" she was losing consciousness again, her lids drooping, her vision hazy.

"N-...no…"

.

.

"Kaede!  _Kaede_!" Footsteps pounded - quick - sending vibrations through the wooden floor. Sango could feel it, even through the futon she was laying on. A door slammed open.

" _Kaede_! She's awake!"

Sango opened her eyes. She was in that same damn room. She was sick of waking up and staring at the same freaking ceiling every morning. Something was different, though. It took a few seconds for her foggy brain to realize she hadn't awoken to that soft, calm humming she'd become accustomed to.

She fought back the sliver of disappointment that tried to surface.

She almost called out for the monk when the vibrations from those footsteps became stronger, grew louder. Two large, brown eyes filled her vision. They were wide and… Terrified? Elated? She couldn't quite tell.

" _Sango_!" he breathed. "You're awake!"

"H… Hojou?" Sango asked, now convinced she was still unconscious and just having a really, really believable dream. Her mouth fell open. The last time she'd seen of Hojou he was on the floor of the attic, and by all laws of nature, dead. His head gashed open, his skull cracked through. No way had he survived.  _No way._

"Sango, you've been out of it for such a long time! How do you feel? How is your head? Can you move? Can you sit up? Are you thirsty? You must be thirsty, one sec!" His words were jumbled together, fast and eager. In contrast, Sango's brain felt slow and moronic, like she couldn't keep up. Her hand shot out to grab onto his arm as he started to move away.

"Is it really… you…?" She asked, not quite ready to believe it was. She had been so convinced that the monk was lying, that he was holding her hostage and trying to get her hopes up that she was really safe.

"Of course it's me!" He beamed. "I have a lot to tell you, but I know you're probably uncomfortable, but you're moving around, that's such a good sign! Kaede will be happy." He took her hand and held it in both of his, giving it a squeeze along with a genuine smile. "I'll be right back, I'm going to get you some water." With that, he dropped her hand and left again.

But when he let go of her hand, Sango kept it in the air.

In front of her face.

Slowly she turned it over to look at her palm. It shook under the strain of her underworked muscles.

Tears sprang to her eyes.

 _It's not possible. It's not…_  The tears welled over her lashes and fell down her cheeks. Slowly she lifted her chin up to see her other hand - it moved! Her fingers curled and uncurled, she gripped them into weak fists, and her arm shook again with the effort. She tried to sit up, her abdomen muscles screaming in pain. She could only move a few centimeters, and her body vibrated with the attempt.

"Hey, whoa, wait a second, I've got you," Hojou said, setting the tray on the ground and kneeling next to her. He wrapped his arm around her back and helped her sit fully erect. He kept his arm there as she worked at steadying herself.

"This is so great, Sango, it really is! When I first came to my thoughts were completely jumbled and I couldn't remember a lot. I even forgot my own name for a bit." He removed his arm once she was steady and picked up the glass of water from the tray. "Thankfully my memories came back, pretty quick and now I feel normal." He lifted the cup to her lips, but Sango moved her head to the side.

"Sorry, just… can I do it myself?"

"Of course!" he replied, unfazed, and held the glass out for her to take. Again, she felt weak as she gripped her fingers around it, both arms straining to carry the weight of it. Slowly, she lifted it to take a sip.

She wanted to break down and bawl like a toddler right then and there. She had all but given up hope that she would ever be able to do such a simple task again, had given up hope that the mere idea of sipping water on her own threatened to overwhelm her.

She would never take for granted such a small freedoms ever again.

Hojou sat by her, his smile wide, waiting for her to finish. Finally, she turned towards him.

"Where are we?" she asked.

"In the forest, on the outskirts of Matsusaka City, Mie Prefecture," he said, his face suddenly serious.

"Wh- how did we get here? We're six hours south of Tokyo!" The glass slipped out of her hands and fell empty onto her lap. Sango cursed as she reached out to pick it up again.

"It's… a long story," he said, all excitement gone. "I'm still trying to process it myself. Kaede will explain it to you."

"Is… is the witch here? The monk…? Her words trailed off and she felt her bottom lip quiver ever so slightly, afraid of his answer.

"No, no of course not," he said, shaking his head and taking the glass from her. "We're safe, Kaede said Kikyou cannot find this place."

"Are you sure you haven't seen the monk? Because… he's been in this room. I've seen him, I've-"

Hojou leaned in, his arms wrapping around her shoulders and pulling her in for a hug, cutting her words short.

"He's not here, Sango, I promise you. I had dreams too, you know. Vivid, realistic dreams about that fight. I thought for sure we were still in that attic when I first woke up."

Could it be? Had her visits with the monk been completely conjured up in her brain? Had she really just been asleep this whole time? Slowly, she wrapped her arms around Hojou's waist, a feeble attempt to hug him back.

School, classes, Sango's boringly-normal-but-wonderfully-comfortable life seemed so far away at this moment like memories pulled from someone else. Hojou had been a big part of that life, constantly in the background before he and Kagome had made a connection, and then constantly in the forefront when Kagome wouldn't shut up about him. He was always  _nice_ , but was he always this  _friendly_?

Yes. Kagome had gushed as much about his kindness as his good looks back then. Sango appreciated his kindness now, bringing just a bit of nostalgia of that normalcy back to her now.

...And she had to go and ruin the moment by asking such a ridiculous question, of course.

"Hojou, can you do me a favor and check my legs? And my back? It… it feels like there's something embedded in me somewhere, like a piece of glass or something." It didn't. Her body just felt sore. But the last thing she remembered, whether it was a dream or real life, was the monk threatening to embed the jewel shard in her somewhere. And she wanted to make sure… she wanted to make sure she was really making it all up.

He stiffened slightly, but when he pulled away, that smile was still on his face.

"Sure, I can do that for you. Here, we'll do it slow," he said. Carefully, he lifted the futon covers up off her legs and pushed it to the side.

She was wearing a simple cotton yukata, with pale blue flowers dotting the hem. Through the slit in the fabric, she could see her legs. She had half been expecting they'd be withered and shriveled and pale, but they looked strong and only slightly less tan than she remembered.

Hojou's touch was gentle, and she was overcome suddenly with gratitude. Up until this point, she had considered Kagome as her oldest and truest friend. But with recent events… Once her father had given her Hojou's number, once she realized who was on the other line… Once Hojou had promised her,  _sincerely_  promised her that he would help her, he had slowly been nudging himself into first place in that competition. The knowledge that he understood her, that he knew exactly what she was going through as a slayer himself… it meant something.

He peeled back the Yukata from her legs and lifted them gently, one at a time, looking them over with proficient eyes before coming them back up again.

"Okay, hold it together here while I check your stomach," he said, pointing to her lap. Sango tried to suppress the blush that crept over her cheeks as she held the fabric together in her hands. Hojou untied the yukata at her waist and slipped it open. She was glad to see her breasts were loosely bound, a rudimentary bra since her modern once had probably been completely ruined by her brothers' blade.

 _Don't think of that now_ , she berated herself as Hojou nodded, his assessment of her midsection done.

"Nothing here, Sango. Let me check your back."

Wincing at the feeling of all the small muscles in her shoulders and back coming to life after such a long time, she gently shrugged the fabric off her shoulders and let it fall around her waist. She felt Hojou's fingertips at her back. They were tracing something, a shape she couldn't make out.

"What is it?" she asked.

"It's a scar," he said quietly. "It's a big scar, it takes up a good portion of your upper back. No glass, though. Looks kinda like a star..."

"Great, a giant scar on my back, just what I wanted," Sango muttered. They were both quiet for a moment, and Sango let his words sink in. She knew what the scar was from.

"I have to apologize," Hojou finally said, his hands leaving her back, "for what happened in that house."

"It's not your fault," she said, probably too quickly.

"I was overly confident in my abilities. I thought with you and me together, we'd be able to get in and out, no problem. I didn't stop to think that the way we do things might not work when it comes to an evil that's not youkai."

Sango winced again as she shrugged back into the yukata and began to re-tied it at her waist. She turned her head to look at him.

"We both know what went wrong in that attic, Hojou, and it wasn't overconfidence on our end," she tried to hide the spite in her voice and failed. It was a few moments before he replied.

"...I know what you're thinking."

"How could I not think it? We both know it's true."

"You blame her," he said, without hesitation, "I can't say I wasn't…  _disappointed_ in her actions too."

"It doesn't matter anymore," she muttered, not wanting to think about it. "It killed her, so none of it matters."

"Hey," he said, eyes widening slightly. "Kagome's alive, you know."

It was a slap in the face.

" _What_?" She said, her hands freezing on the yukata tie.

"Kagome's alive. She's not here, but she's alive."

The acid built up and threatened to bubble over in Sango's stomach.

"You're sure?" she asked, half expecting him to take it back. At his nod, she gripped onto the sheets in her lap. "Where is she?"

Hojou's brows furrowed together. He sat back against the wall and propped his elbow on his knee, his eyes turning to gaze out one of the many windows that encircled the room.

"Inuyasha," he said, a muscle in his jaw clenching. "She's with Inuyasha."


	34. The Acorn Shard

Inuyasha

"You know what you have to do right?"

Kagome nodded, her brows drawn together in determination, though her eyes actively avoided looking at the dead body at her feet.

"What do you do if I tell you to get into the cave?"

"I drop everything and immediately get inside the cave," she repeated the words he'd said just a few moments earlier.

"Keh, good," he handed her the collapsible shovel Kaede had packed away for them. Old hag thought of everything. "Don't take too long."

"What, don't take too long digging the six-foot hole in the forest floor?" sarcasm dripped from every word as she yanked the shovel from his hand. "You do know what you're asking me to do, right?"

"Not what I meant," he growled.

"No? What did you mean?" she was already stepping out of the cave and into the sunlight.

"I just don't like you being so damn exposed. You're helpless."

She whipped around to glare at him, her eyes narrowed into slits. "You weren't saying that when I burnt Kikyou to a crisp," she raised the shovel above her head and struck the spear into the dirt.

Inuyasha watched her work. She  _was_  slow, just like he knew she would be, but the sooner the wolf body was buried the less chance they'd have of being re-discovered before nightfall. Plus, it stunk, just like all wolves stunk. It was filling up the cave and giving him a headache.

His ears swiveled diligently, determined not to let his guard down again, not just in regards to possible attackers, either.

 _I was a fucking idiot_.

He should have stayed awake, should have kept more distance between him and Kagome.

 _Won't be making that mistake again_ , he huffed as he watched her work. Sweat started to gather at her hairline and above her lip as the pile of dirt rose painfully slow. She paused to sweep her hair up into a ponytail, exposing the back of her neck. A few strands had fallen free and were starting to stick to her skin as she worked.

He could still feel her curled up beside him, fitting perfectly against his chest and hips.

And damn if he hadn't slept more peacefully than he ever remembered. It was the best sleep he'd gotten in awhile. The next few months were going to be brutal, now that he knew how it  _could_  feel.

It took her all fucking day to dig that hole, which meant he had all fucking day to stew there in that stinking wolf-cave and pretend like he wasn't watching the nape of her neck, to fool himself into thinking his deep slumber earlier meant absolutely nothing other than he was fucking tired.

And he was tired. He was ridiculously- _fucking_ -tired.

Finally,  _finally_  the sun set, and Inuyasha stepped out of the cave, his muscles sore from being so on-edge. He let his shoulders slump and rolled them around a few times, working out the kinks before taking the shovel out of Kagome's hands.

She'd taken a couple of breaks over the hours, and her terrible, human pace had slowed to an even more-agonizing crawl. He could smell the blood from the blisters that formed and popped and rubbed raw past the layers of her skin. He frowned, ignoring her panting. He gripped her hand in his fingers. He turned it over to look at her palm.

A pang of guilt? Is that what that was? That little sharp twist in his chest that kinda hurt a little bit?  _Are you okay?_  He wanted to ask. It was on the tip of his tongue.

"Why'd you work so hard?" he said instead, his tone accusatory, "if you were bleeding, you should have stopped." He watched her brows furrow and her lips turn down. She jerked away and cradled her hands together.

"Are you kidding me? You practically threatened to feed me to the wolves if I didn't dig the hole."

"Keh," he replied, pushing back a disturbing urge to wrap her in his arms and comfort her. Instead, he threw the shovel to the side and crouched down in the hole - which was only one-third complete - and sunk his claws into the dirt. It was semi-soft. This would be easy for him.

"What are you doing?" Kagome asked from behind him. Inuyasha turned over his shoulder. He couldn't help the grin that spread across his face.

"I'd move if I were you," he warned. Then he started to dig. Dirt sprayed out behind him as he worked, stopping only moments later when he heard Kagome shriek.

"Stop! Stop it!" She cried, running around the hole so she was out of Inuyasha's warpath. He looked up from his digging, eyebrow cocked as she shook her head and clothes, trying to get the dirt off of her.

She was laughing.

Inuyasha stood and watched as she danced around. She looked ridiculous, and her laughter was contagious. He smiled despite himself.

"Inuyasha, I'm covered!" She said, holding her sides and falling to her knees in laughter. He leaned against the side of the hole, which was considerably deeper now, thanks to him, folded his arms on the ground and rested his chin on his forearms, watching as her body shook.

"I warned ya," he said, a chuckle escaping from his chest.

"You did  _not_!" a new fit of giggles overtook her.

He watched her, and his chest tightened. Damn, she was pretty. He couldn't help the swell of relief he felt that she was still  _human_ , still normal, still somewhat like the high-schooler he'd run into on that first night inside the museum.

He wanted that. That  _normalcy_. He ached for it.

What would his life have been like if he wasn't born  _hanyou_? Would he and Kikyou have had a normal relationship? Had whelps and grown old and died like normal, weak humans did?

...Well, probably not with Kikyou. She was, despite being human, too extraordinary to form any sort of lasting bond with normal humans, that's why she'd been drawn to him in the first place: his otherworldliness. If he had been born human, she wouldn't have looked at him twice.

_Keh, you'd have been better off, idiot._

...But what if he'd been born a regular human in this time? Gone to school and met Kagome there? Would she have wanted to be his friend? Would they spend their afternoons going to more of those burger food places she took him to? Would they talk on those phone things all the humans carried around?

He imagined it as she laughed. Imagined that he was normal and she had never gone into the museum and never discovered the jewel hidden in her side.  _Keh_ , of course she'd had a boyfriend, with her hair and lips and the way she kissed and that laugh, although he questioned her taste in human men.

_If I were born human, would she choose me instead of Hojou?_

Her laughter lulled him, even as it died down to lighter giggling, her breath heaving in and out as she tried to catch it. Would he rather be anywhere else right now? Would he trade her laughter for anything?

"It's good," he said before he realized he was speaking out loud, "that you can still be happy."

Her breathing stopped short and she sat up straight.

"Oh?" she said, after a moment's pause.

"Yeah, I was... worried, you know, after everything that happened to you. Most people wouldn't be laughing. You're still laughing."

He watched her face in the growing darkness. She seemed shy suddenly, a blush creeping up her cheeks. He could hear her heart start to pound as she drew her knees to her chest, and slowly started picking out smaller bits of dirt from her hair.

"I've been thinking about it," she said. She was choosing her words carefully, he could hear the hesitation in her voice, "and you're right, a lot has happened. I'm still not sure about my family. About Sango or Hojou. And at first, I hated you. For making me go after the shards, for not letting me go home...  _But_ -" she emphasized as he opened his mouth to argue, "it's true that this is bigger than me. I don't know the full extent of what Kikyou can do, or what she's  _willing_  to do. Heck, I don't know the extent of what  _I'm_  able to do." She held her palms up, looking them over. "I do know I can't protect my family just by being near them. I can barely protect myself. I certainly wasn't able to protect my friends. And throughout all this, the only one telling me the truth… the only one keeping me alive…" her eyes darted up to his, "is you." She leaned forward and reached a tentative hand out, grazing his forearm with her fingertips, her voice almost a whisper.

"You're the only one actively trying to keep me alive. And I know it's for the jewel. I know you have your own agenda. But that's okay because it's the only chance I have of protecting my family and friends. And I… I want to  _thank_  you for that, really, I-"

"Keh," Inuyasha snorted, pulling away from her touch. She couldn't fucking touch him right now because he wanted her to touch him  _more_ , wanted her to move closer to him and put her lips on his, and  _fuck,_  he just couldn't control himself. "It's nothing. You're right, we both have the same goal - get rid of Kikyou. For us both to be free of her. Let's just keep focused on that."

He tried not to notice how her lips pulled down at the corners, how she sighed long and heavy, how the absence of her laughter was frustratingly louder than it had been before.

He kept digging.

.

.

Once Inuyasha dumped the body into the hole, he gathered as many broken, discarded pine branches as he could and rubbed them around the floor of the cave, over and over again, soaking up the blood and masking up the smell of dead wolf as best he could. He threw each one into the hole on top of the body before filling it back in with dirt. By the time he was done the moon was a third of its way on its ascent into the night sky. He glanced at it, making a note in his head of when the full moon would come around. Luckily there was a good amount of time left to go. If he was lucky, they'd be long gone from Wolf territory before then.

They packed up quickly and left. For the next few nights, Inuyasha was tediously careful. As soon as he stumbled upon a cave he thought would work they immediately took it as their own, no matter how much night time they had left available to them. He wasn't going to take any chances of running out of daylight and being forced into a sleeping arrangement he wasn't comfortable with. Plus, the less time he spent in the mirror, the better.

He would say nothing to Kagome because it was none of her business, but he could feel the spell Kikyou had over the mirror weakening. It had been weeks now since she'd been able to re-weave the spell, and just like he suspected, it was slowly coming apart, bit by bit.

If Miroku hadn't been in the attic, that damn, lecherous monk, he would have killed Kikyou for good then and there, the spell would have eventually worn away and he wouldn't have to find the damn shards. He would have eventually just been able to walk away from the mirror a free man.

The jewel shards would be his insurance. Once he had them all together, he wouldn't have to worry either way.

The same thoughts tumbled through his head every day they made camp, going over and over and over his plan, trying to think of every possible turn of event that could happen, what the outcome would be, and how he'd be able to turn them in his favor. Every daybreak that they laid down to sleep Kagome left her extra pillow out for him, and every day he pushed it away from him, curling up as far from her as he could and keeping his ears on alert.

One evening, Kagome stiffened as they were packing up camp. Inuyasha caught the slight shift in her breathing, caught the way her shoulder muscles tightened up. He whipped his head around to glare at her.

"What?" he asked accusingly.

"I think I sense a shard."

He jerked back, shocked. "What?" he repeated.

"Yeah, I… I can sense it. It's coming this way." She frowned. "It's moving weird."

"What do you mean, 'moving weird?'" he growled.

"I don't know, I can't… it's moving in short bursts, and kind of... sporadically? I don't know how else to explain it."

Inuyasha could feel his youkai blood pumping, could feel it resurfacing again. "Does it feel like how you sensed it with the spider youkai?"

She shook her head. "No, the movement's weird. It's different."

"Different  _how_?" he asked, agitated.

"I don't know, it's just-"

He heard it then, movements in the underbrush. He swiped out his hand, a signal for Kagome to shut up, and was satisfied that she obeyed him immediately. Ignoring the satisfied chuckle of his youkai, he stepped forward to the mouth of the cave, keeping Kagome behind him and crouching low, sniffing the air. It wasn't a wolf, he was sure of that. But he  _did_  smell that distinct youkai scent.

What intelligent youkai would be in Wolf territory? The dumb, mindless ones were one thing, but the intelligent ones... they kept to themselves, rarely teaming up with other youkai sects. This youkai was all over the place, not trying to hide at all. His scent also seemed to dart around…

 _Sporadically_ , as Kagome had said.

And she was right, it was headed their way.

Inuyasha let out a low growl, keeping his youkai right at the edge, ready to release him if needed. He could hear the sharp, little panting breaths, and… cursing, high-pitched and whining.

"The fuck…?" Inuyasha mumbled, standing straight and cocking his head to the side.

He watched, wide-eyed, as a squirrel - a  _fucking_  squirrel - ran out from the bush.

"Oh!" Kagome breathed beside him. In his shock he hadn't realized she'd moved right up behind him. She was peeking around his side, her hands fisted in his fire rat coat. "Ohmigosh, how  _cute_!" she cried, her pitch reaching a note like scratched glass in his ears. "Oh - oh look, Inuyasha it's got an acorn!" She moved from behind him and plopped down on the ground, one hand up to cover her mouth, the other pointing at the stupid creature. "It's got…" she trailed off, her back stiffening again.

"So what, it's a dumb acorn."

"Uh," she said smartly, "it's got… a shard…"

"Hm?" He bent over Kagome's head, trying to get a look at the rodent. Its hands moved quick, turning the acorn around and around in sharp, jutted motions with its tiny hands, its eyes rolling in its head as it sized the two of them up. Inuyasha's sucked in a breath when he saw the light pink sliver gleaming in the fading darkness.

There it was.

A fucking jewel shard.

"Shit," he spat "don't move, Kagome, I'll get him," and crouched low. Usually he'd just pounce, but squirrels were slippery little fuckers, he didn't want it to run off on him and possibly lose it.

"Don't hurt it!" Kagome angry-whispered out of the corner of her mouth.

"Keh," he whispered back, "you make everything more complicated than it fucking needs to be." ...But fine, he wouldn't kill the fucker.

"Let me grab a snack bar, maybe I can entice it over to us?" She moved back towards the cave slowly, step by step. Inuyasha flicked his ears back as she rustled through the pack. She reappeared then, creeping towards him.

The creature moved.

Inuyasha jumped, coming straight down at it from above. At the last second the little shit darted away.

"Goddammit!" He cursed before wheeling around and taking off after it, ignoring Kagome's cries to wait. He followed it with his eyes, tracking it zig-zagging across the sloping forest floor. Every attempt he made was useless until he finally made the right guess as to where it would go next. He slapped his hands into a mini-dome over the rodent, ears twitching as it chirped in a panic.

 _You deserve to suffer, you little shit_ , he thought, slowly compressing his hands together until he had a firm grip around it.

 _Don't hurt it!_  Kagome had said.

"I won't fucking hurt you," he muttered, picking the acorn out of its grubby little hands and turning it over to see the shard. It was still there, jammed into a crack in the acorn's otherwise smooth exterior. The creature squeaked in his hands and the thought flitted through his mind that he could just give it a little squeeze for good measure - not to hurt him or anything, but as punishment for making Inuyasha chase after him like an idiot.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome breathed, breaking through the bush and panting heavily. "I can- I can barely see, I thought I lost you for a second."

"Idiot, stay back at the cave, I would have-"

"I saw it," she gasped as she tried to catch her breath. "A youkai, I saw it."

" _What_?" he seethed, heart pounding in his chest, adrenaline rushing through him. How the fuck could he have completely forgotten about the youkai he'd sensed? Was he so far gone that just a glimpse of a shard made him lose his rational thought? He stood up and whipped around to face her. " _Where_?"

"Right here."

The voice was small and squeaky, not unlike the squirrel Inuyasha still held in his hand. He stood no more than two feet tall, his face chubby, his hair deep red and wild. He was shirtless, saved for a fur wrap laid over his shoulders, and he wore a dirty, torn up pair of pants, tied at the waist.

He puffed out his chest, his cheeks filling with air and pushed his bare feet wide, his hands pressing into his hips, trying to look bigger than he was, which was impossible for such a runt. His wide, blue eyes stared Inuyasha down, dared him to make a move.

"That's mine!" He shouted, pointing towards the acorn in Inuyasha's other hand. His finger shook, the anger coming off of him in waves. "Give it to me!"

Inuyasha dropped the squirrel who immediately ran off into the bush. He held up the acorn with two fingers, showing it off.

"What, this?" he asked, sneering down at the demanding brat. "This belongs to me. Finders-keepers."

"No, no! I found it first!" the kit cried, hopping on his little, gimpy feet and waving his stumpy arms in the air.

"Well it came from inside  _her_ , so really, she found it first," he bit back, jerking his thumb in Kagome's direction.

"H-hey!" he could see the blush rising into her cheeks. Why did he like the way that looked so much?

"Shuddup! It's mine! If you won't give it to me, I'll take it by force!"

What a load of crap, he was a kid, a kit, a little shit who was too far away from mommy. "What the hell are you even doing here, brat? You're a fox, don't you know who's territory you're in?"

"I can take care of myself!" He shouted, his little fingers balled up into fists as we waved them into the air. "Besides, you're one to talk, you're just a dog! Just a stupid, stupid dog! You'll be sorry if you don't hand it over!"

"Keh. What are you going to do about it?"

"Argh!" he cried. A loud popping sound echoed through the trees, and suddenly there were seven of him.

"Wha- what?" cried Kagome, as Inuyasha took a step back. Fucking foxes with their trickery... He kept his eyes on the one he was sure was real.

"You think you can fool me, you little shit? You're not getting the shard, end of story!" He held the acorn up above his head, taunting the stupid fox. Kitsune magic was lame, nothing but trickery of the eyes.

All seven fox's leapt into the air, and Inuyasha stepped back in preparation. They each whipped out a little bow and arrow, aiming them right at him.

"Inuyasha, no!" Kagome shrieked.

All seven arrows released at once and flew through the air, merging into one before piercing him right through his heart and into the thick bark behind him. The wind knocked out of him as he was flung up against a tree.

He roared out into the night, his hand coming up to remove the arrow. He would break that fucking fox in two!

It fucking hurt!

But the arrow wouldn't budge. He yanked and pulled tried to snap it off. It stayed impaled in him.

The fox was now back to himself, the six copies gone. He ran up Inuyasha's leg and onto his shoulder, swiping the acorn from his hand and jumping back down onto the floor.

"I  _told_  you!" He taunted, sticking his tongue out for good measure.

"Fuck you, you little shit, get it off me!" Inuyasha kicked out with his legs, but it did no good. "Kagome!" he roared.

She was on him then, her hands wrapped around the arrow shaft, trying to wrench it out of him.

"I- I can't!" she gasped, struggling with all her might.

It stayed put.

" _Fuck!_ "

"Next time you'll listen to me, you stupid dog!" the runt yelled before running off into the forest.

"Wait!" Inuyasha growled, his hand reaching out. He couldn't be trapped here forever, that little brat had to free him!

"Don't worry, Inuyasha, I'll get him and bring him back!" Kagome said, turning and running off after him, already stumbling in the darkness.

"Kagome, wait! Wait!"

She disappeared between the thick trees.

"Kagome, you can't leave me pinned like this!" He shouted after her, struggling and twisting under the arrow, ignoring the shooting pain that radiated from his shoulder every time he moved. "Fuck,  _Kagome_!"

" _Kagome_!"

Only silence met him back.


	35. From the Aphotic Depths

Kagome

Kagome trampled through the thick shrubbery, ignoring Inuyasha's panicked cries as they faded behind her. It was almost impossible to see. The only visible light source were the shards strung around her neck. She fought the urge to pull them out and use them as a rudimentary flashlight and kept her focus on the shard the little fox youkai had with him instead. She moved only as fast as she dared to, careful of the bow and quiver of arrows at her back, pushing thick sets of vines and branches out of her way. She forced a path for herself, cursing when she stepped into a wet, muddy spot and felt it soak into her shoes.

She'd been lucky enough so far to be able to ride on Inuyasha's back. He was right - if she were on her own it would take forever to find the shards. She couldn't even keep her shoes dry.

Her heart thudded in her chest. The idea that Inuyasha could be stuck on that tree forever weighed heavy on her mind. What would she do if the fox youkai escaped? What would she do if the arrow he'd pinned Inuyasha with kept him from being sucked back into the mirror at daybreak? What if he died there, pinned to the tree, and left her alone to deal with Kikyou?

...She didn't  _want_  him to die. The thought of it left a pain almost unbearable to describe. When it came to Inuyasha, the resolve that she had agreed to earlier was slowly crumbling apart and there was no way for her to build it back up.

It didn't help that he wasn't exactly sticking to the plan either, what with wrapping himself around her while she slept. Not that she had minded, really.

In fact, when she'd woken up, groggy and confused as to why she was so comfortable, she thought for a moment she was dreaming. It wasn't until she sensed the shard coming that she realized he was really snuggling up to her in his sleep.

 _Don't think about that,_  she chided herself as she drew closer to the pulsation of the shard.

She heard it then: small, sniffling, almost-quiet sobs and a tiny voice crying out for mommy.

_Oh no._

Back at the cave, Kagome had rushed back to grab her bow and arrow so she could follow after Inuyasha, irked that he had run off without her. As she started into the forest, the little youkai popped out from between the trees, right in her path. She'd been so shocked she hadn't known what to do. She couldn't believe her eyes at first, he was so small and cute! She had to resist the urge to pick him up and squeeze him tight to her chest like she always did to her cat, Buyo, at home. He was filthy though, despite his small, plump and childish frame. His skin was covered in scratch marks and dirt, his red hair rusted and caked with grime, his clothes disheveled and ripped, his little feet bare and calloused.

"Where'd the squirrel go?" he'd demanded after freezing in his tracks and giving her a sniff. His eyes were wide, as if worried he'd lost the creature, and Kagome, stunned into silence at the sight of him, merely pointed in the direction she'd seen Inuyasha dart off in. It took her a few seconds before she realized she should go after Inuyasha herself, warn him that a youkai was coming. Albeit a small, cute, disturbingly filthy one.

And now, here, as he cried, she couldn't help but wonder:  _Is he orphaned_? She could barely make out his shape in the darkness. Just enough light pulsated from the small shard still jammed in the acorn he held in his hands. His body was quivering, wrapped into a little ball as he sobbed, calling out for his mom. She didn't want to scare him off again, and she probably only had one chance. Slowly she knelt down, resting her palms on her knees, then her chin on her hands, trying to seem as unthreatening as possible. He stiffened but didn't move.

"My name is Kagome," she said as soft as she could, "what's your name?"

"L-leave me alone," he sniffed.

"I can't. You're crying."

"I-I'm not," he hiccupped and wiped at his face.

"I cry sometimes too," she continued, purposely avoiding any sort of confrontation of his feelings so as not to poke at his pride. "Sometimes I get really lonely and cry, and sometimes I cry when I'm scared and I don't know what to do next."

He sniffed again, loudly, and turned to her. "I'm not scared," he said, bottom lip quivering.

"I know you're not, you're very brave, it's obvious."

"I took what's mine and defeated that stupid dog."

"Yes, you did."

"I just miss my mom."

A flutter rippled through Kagome's heart, half saddened by his confession, half relieved she'd got him talking. She wasn't sure how youkai aged, although she knew it was slower than humans. She was pretty sure this one was very, very young.

"I miss my mom too," she said, and then, tentatively, "what happened to yours?"

He took a deep breath through quivering lips. "She's dead. So's my dad."

"Oh, I'm so sorry. That must be very lonely for you."

"Is your mom dead too?" he asked. He blinked his eyes up at her as they started to water again.

"I don't know," she whispered, "maybe."

"So you're like me?" he took another step forward.

Should she lie to try and get him to trust her more, or go with the truth and hope he would give her the shard based on that? "My mom might still be alive, but that's why I need the shard you have," she gambled, "I need all the shards so I can put them together and-"

"No!" he took a step back and Kagome's heart jumped into her throat. "No, you can't have it! If you take it from me they'll bully me again, and I don't want to be bullied anymore!"

' _Stay calm. Stay calm_ , she chanted internally, and then: "Who bullies you?"

"The wolves!" he cried. "They found me when my mom and dad died and they took me in, but they don't treat me as nice as the wolf cubs because I'm a fox and - and they think they're better'n me!"

"Oh…" Kagome reached out a hand to comfort him, but he jerked back.

"No! They feed me and let me sleep in their caves and in return I find these," he whipped the acorn around and held it up to show her. Kagome's eyes widened as the pink glow spread across the little youkai's devastated face. The tears had left dirt-soaked trails down his cheeks, "I can't give this to you so I can bring it back and they'll let me eat some meat!" he said.

"Are you hungry? You should have said so sooner," she pulled a snack bar out of her pocket, the one she'd grabbed to entice the squirrel. She guessed enticing the little youkai would work just as well. "I have this."

He cocked his head to the side and leaned forwards cautiously to sniff at the plastic wrapper, then pulled back slightly eyes moving up to her own.

"It's not poisoned?" he asked.

"Eh? Poisoned? Why would you ask that?"

"Well sometimes humans put out poisoned food for little animals to eat, you know? And sometimes little animals that don't know better will eat it, and they bleed out of their ears and nose and eyes and-"

"That's horrible."

"Well  _I_  don't eat it," he huffed. " _I_  can sniff it out. I only  _look_  like a kid, you know." he crossed his arms and lifted his nose into the air. Kagome couldn't help her smile.

_He's kind of like Inuyasha…_

"Do you sniff any poison in this?" She asked, waving it enticingly in front of his face.

"It's wrapped in plastic, I can't tell," he said, is little nose wrinkling in disgust.

"I see…" She said, tapping it against her chin to make a show of her thinking it over. "Okay then," she tore open the top of the plastic and pulled the wrapper off, taking a bite off the top and chewing slowly. "Mmm!" she said, "it's good!"

"Ah… really?" he reached his hands out for it, "I can have it?" Smiling again, Kagome held it out for him to take.

And he did, wrapping his thin fingers around the bar, he pulled it greedily to him and took a big bite. He chewed rapidly, not unlike the little squirrel they'd chased earlier.

"Is it good?" she asked, hoping he'd open up to hear a little bit more.

He nodded, then froze, his eyes narrowing. He took a step back and clutched the rest of the bar to his chest.

"Th-this is mine now. You gave it to me, you can't give it back!"

She couldn't help the giggle that escaped her lips. "It's all yours. I already ate," she lied. "Besides, I-" the words caught in her throat.

 _Oh no. Oh no, no, no…_  Dread washed over her in waves. She was going to be sick with it.

"You what, lady?" In the pale light of the jewel, he walked towards her and placed his little hand on her shin.

"A shard," she whispered, eyes wide. "A shard is coming our way."

"What do you-" His sentence also stopped. She watched his eyes widen in fear to match her own. His body started to shiver, different from when he was crying. His little fingernails dug into her skin.

"Naraku," he whispered.

Kagome had never heard that name before, but the terror in his voice convinced her it was someone she did not want to run into.

"Run-"

Before she could move, it burst from the deep, black night, more silent than it should have been. More silent than possible. Kagome could barely make it out before it wrapped around the little fox youkai's body and thrust him up into the air.

He shrieked, high-pitched and frightened, towering above Kagome's head.

"No!" She screamed, reaching for her bow.

It slammed into her then: fat, wet and slimy. It wrapped around her sides and crumpled the breath from inside her. It was a tentacle - which was impossible - but it  _was._  It lifted her off the ground just as it had the fox, squeezing, sticky and cold. She pushed against it, tried to pull her hips out of its tight grip.

She couldn't. Despite the thick slime that covered its rubbery skin, it lacked any slip and instead stuck to her, like goo.

_I can sense them… they're here..._

The voice was… nothing. For a second, Kagome felt that she imagined it. It was a wheeze, a whisper, a bitter, desperate, hostile voice made out of nothing but air. It didn't echo in the space around her, it felt closer, like a dream - no - a nightmare.

_You have them… give them to me… the jewel… the jewel…_

She bent over the tentacle as best she could, desperately trying to see if it had any shards itself. In the pitch black she could only see a half a foot or so in front of her, and she wasn't about to pull the shards out from under her shirt and swing them around like a beacon. The tentacle just disappeared into what looked like nothingness. She couldn't find the familiar pink glow she'd come to associate with the shard she sensed down there, but she could  _feel_  it... somewhere. Whatever this thing was, this  _Naraku_ , as the little youkai had called it, it had a shard, maybe multiple.

"No!" the fox youkai shrieked off to her right, "give it back,  _give it back!_ " She could hear the despair in his voice; could hear him crying, desperate and fraught. She watched as the glow of the little fox's shard ripped away from him and moved down, down, down towards where the bulk of the youkai lay. She kept her eye on it, hoping the glow would give her a better look at what she was dealing with.

But it was simply swallowed up by nothingness, like a black hole sitting on the earth's crust. Light did not penetrate it. It was just gone.

Shaking - from fear or from the cold? - she reached around to her back and drew her bow, then an arrow. She kept her eyes on the point where she had last seen the shard's light. If the youkai had gone after the little fox's shard, it meant it was coming for hers' next.

What would Inuyasha do, she wondered, if she lost the few shards they'd collected so far? What would he say to her? Even worse, what could she say to herself? How could she live with herself if she gave up the one thing that could guarantee the safety of her friends and family?

 _Fuck you_ , she thought, nocking her bow and drawing it taut.  _Fuck you if you think you're going to take what little hope I have left._

Her training kicked in. All those hours of practicing with Kaede, all those hours of gathering her powers and directing the flow into her arrow. She felt the warmth. She reveled in it. Her chest expanded with it.

She released.

It flew through the air, lighting up the atmosphere around it. Down, down, down it rushed, casting its glow on the branches and leaves, on the thick, long tentacle, until it too was swallowed into darkness.

For a fleeting moment, Kagome gave up hope.

But then it struck. Deathly silent. Her powers lit the youkai as it pierced into him, the light flashing, duller than she'd experienced it before. But it was just enough.

There it was: A writhing mass.

The youkai was a bloated bag of skin, moving erratically, like hundreds of smaller creatures had been swallowed up and were desperately trying to rip their way from the inside out. Dark, rubbery skin, like blubber, and disjointed bodies, all writhing and twisted, frantic to break free.

It made a sound then, not the same as in her head. It was different, an otherworldly screech that caused her bones to grind together. There was a  _pop_  and the mass burst apart, sending chunks flying in every direction. The tentacle around her loosened. She slipped through the sticky goo.

She fell.

Her scream caught in her throat as her hip slammed into a branch, causing her to cartwheel in the air before her shoulder slammed into another. She flopped onto a third, her belly smacking into the bark. It was thicker and with less give. It knocked the wind from her lungs. Slowly, still covered in the slime, she slid off the branch and slammed onto the ground, her arrows clattering out of her quiver.

She felt the crunch of glass.

She struggled to lift her head. The few shards she had were scattered out in front of her, the broken glass fragments of the bottle they were encased in mixed up with them. It was hard for her to breath. Her hip throbbed. Her shoulder ached. Her ribs screamed every time she breathed.

Something shuffled towards her. A small hand lifted the disheveled hair that had fallen over her face. The little fox was knelt down next her her, his large eyes wide and puffy and swollen.

"Are you going to die, nice lady?" he asked, his voice meek and worried.

Kagome's heart ached for him.

"Wha… what's your name?" Each breath was a sharp knife, stabbing in between her ribs.

"Shippou," he wailed, his cheeks wet with tears.

She tried her best to smile for him, aware that it was probably more of a grimace.

"Shippou," she repeated, "I like that name." She reached out with her right arm, swallowing a scream, and grabbed at the shards scattered out in front of her. She could barely control the shaking in her hand, it caused her to sweep up dirt and dead leaves and glass fragments along with the jewel shards. The glass cut sharp into her skin, just more pain thrown in amongst the rest. She held her fist out to the little fox, her arm shuddering with the effort.

"I know you're brave, Shippou," she wheezed, "can you be brave again for me? I need you to do something."

He sniffed and nodded, holding out his hand.

"Take these back to Inuyasha," she said, dropping the shard-dirt-glass mixture into his palms. It was stained red with her blood, cut open by the broken glass. "Take these back to him and take the arrow out. He'll - he'll be able to help you," a moan escaped from her lips before she could catch it.

"B-but, he tried to kill me," Shippou cried.

"I know, but this is why you have to be brave. He won't kill you, tell him what happened - tell him what happened and give him the shards." She locked her eyes onto his. It was another gamble. Shippou was so small. He was so scared. He could easily run off with the shards and leave them - Inuyasha trapped to the tree and Kagome to die at the hands of the monster behind her - but at this point, what else could she do?

...What else could she do?

"Shippou, I'll distract the youkai. Go. Go get Inuyasha."

"...Lady, are you going to die?" he asked again

Was she going to die?  _Probably_ … the thought was resigned, and she was somewhat surprised at how calm she was. If she could get herself up though, before the creature put itself back together… she might have a chance.

"Go, Shippou. Go give the shards to Inuyasha. I'll hold off the youkai. Inuyasha will help you."

His jaw set. He cupped his hands together to hold the shards and nodded.

"Don't die okay? Because you gave me food. I'll come back, it's a promise!" he scuttled off into the darkness.

"Brave boy…" she whispered after him.

There was no point in laying there, waiting for death. If little Shippou could be brave, so could she. Kagome pressed her shaking palms against the floor and pushed herself up, screaming out into the dark, a soundtrack to her excruciating pain. She managed to sit up and lean her shoulder against the trunk of the tree she'd fallen against. Her hip throbbed along with her heart.

Her bow had landed next to her, thank God. She picked it up slowly, along with one of the few arrows that managed to stay in one piece during the fall, and nocked it. She listened for the sound of the youkai putting itself back together.

Nothing.

She wanted to laugh. Hysterically laugh. Was there ever going to be a time that she wasn't on the verge of absolute, utter death? How much more of this could she actually take?

 _Maybe it actually died?_  she thought, then felt that hysterical laughter bubble over again.  _Idiot_ , she chided herself, like Inuyasha would have if he were there with her.  _If it's anything like the spider youkai, it's definitely still alive._  She drew the arrow back. Willed her powers to pull in towards her chest.

A whimper fell from her lips, painful and scared. Tears leaked through her lashes, her hopelessness crushing her. The warmth she was used to when she gathered her powers was less. More subtle. It was weaker than it had been before. The glow was dim.

She shivered, gathering as much as she could muster before releasing the arrow. It disappeared into that same inky back, the light of her power extinguished in the dark. Not wanting to wait and see what happened, she grabbed at the rest of the intact arrows she could reach, placing them back in the quiver before nocking one. She drew it back.

A tentacle shot out and slammed into her chest, wrapping around her throat and picking her up off the ground.

Kagome released the arrow, aiming only at the slimy appendage, only at what she could see. It burst apart and splattered across her face, the smell causing her to gag as she dropped back down from the few feet she'd been lifted to.

"Fuck you!" she screamed into the darkness, through the sobs that wracked her body. Her hope was fading. She channeled all her rage towards the creature, everything that had happened so far, everything that she'd been through. She channeled it all into one big ball of rage as she reached out and grabbed another arrow. "Fuck! You!" she screamed.

Another tentacle slammed into her. The force caused her to drop her bow. It slithered around her neck again, picked her up and shoved her up against the tree.

It squeezed.

Kagome kicked her legs out, the empty fingers of her left hand spazzed desperately at the air as the pressure in her head built. Her grip tightened on the arrow, managed to lift it above her head and started stabbing at the thick, rubbery skin with the arrowhead, but she couldn't get her powers to gather into it this time. It was like something was suppressing it. She was unable to call it forward, like she had when Kikyou had been crushing the breath from her. The strength in her arms weakened, she couldn't thrust the arrow through the thick goop.

She couldn't breathe.

It was too dark to tell, but she was sure her vision was blurring, sure she was blacking out.

She heard her name echoing through the woods around her.

...Relief.

Sweet, sweet relief as she sucked air into her lungs. She didn't even care that she slammed back onto the ground, or that her body screamed out in pain. She could breathe.  _She could breathe_!

Clawed hands scooped up under her shoulders. Her legs scraped against the ground as strong arms wrapped around her and pulled her back against a warm chest.

"Kagome, hey," he said, his voice urgent but with a hint of gentleness that she had never heard before. His hands wiped at her face, clearing her tears and the grime that covered her cheeks. "Hey, hey, hey, look at me. Look at me." His fingers gripped her under her chin and lifted her head up. She obeyed and opened her eyes.

He was so close to her, his brows drawn, an expression she'd never seen before on his face.

"Inuyasha," she breathed. She brought her hand up against his cheek as her eyes filled with fresh tears. She tried to blink them away. She wanted to see him clearly. "You came."

"Of course I came, idiot. What, you think I-"

She didn't want him to speak anymore, unless it was her name falling from his perfect mouth. She wrapped her hands around the back of his neck and pulled him down, bringing his lips to hers, cutting off the useless words she didn't care for.

She kissed him. Poured her relief into him as the tears fell from her lashes and dripped happily down her face, warm and comforting against her cold skin.

Inuyasha hesitated slightly before his hand came up to cradle her head and he pulled her closer to him. He was gentle. He was  _so_  gentle with her, as if she were glass.

He kissed her back.

Was it just her, or was it different this time? There was no rushed lust. The stir she felt was calm and deep. Was he speaking to her like she was speaking to him? Did he know that she was thanking him?

...Did he know that in that moment he was her everything? That she would die without him? Not just here, now, swooping in and saving her as he always did, even in the very beginning, shielding her from Kikyou as he had before. No, she would die without him from now on.

Forever.

She could no longer imagine her life without him, could no longer go another day without his hands on her, touching her in some way. Even just a brush against her skin would be enough.

She could no longer live without him.

He broke the kiss, his hand at her cheek. "Can you sit up on your own?" he asked, breathless.

She nodded, "I can do anything you ask me to," she said, her lids heavy, suddenly drowsy and tired.

His eyes widened for just a moment before they hardened again. His hand moved away from her cheek and he turned his face away from her. She felt cold without his eyes on her.

"Stay with her, runt," she heard him say. "You protect her with your life, do you understand me?"

"I'll protect her with my life," Shippou replied.

 _Oh, Shippou_ , Kagome cried on the inside.

"If you don't, I'll do worse to you than I'm about to do to this youkai."

"I got it, you  _stupid dog_. She saved my life, so I'll protect her with it!"

Inuyasha held her shoulders steady as he stood up, allowing her to set her shoulder back against the tree before letting go.

"I'll give it to you, fox - you're brave for a little shit," he said, and Kagome detected admiration in his voice. "Stay here."

She couldn't see him move in the dark, but she heard him kneel down before jumping with those crazy powerful legs of his, heard his clothes whipping in the air as he flew. Heard him shout as his claws ripped through tentacle blubber.

She could barely make out Shippou's form as he moved in between her and the chaos happening in front of them in the dark. He thrust his arms out to each side, as if he were a shield that would stop a tidal wave. She could see his little arms quiver in the dark. He was scared out of his mind.

"D-d-don't worry, lady, I w-w-won't let anything happen t-t-to you anymore!"

"Shippou," she said, trying to hold on to the feeling of Inuyasha's arms wrapped around her as she shivered, "you're the bravest youkai I know."

"I-I've always been brave!" He shouted into the darkness, over the snarling and ripping and shredding and screeching echoing in the dark.

Yes, Kagome knew for sure.

...Shippou had always been brave.


	36. The Desperation Deep Inside

Inuyasha 

 

Inuyasha snarled, tearing at the arrow that speared him to the tree, shredding his claws against it as he listened helplessly to Kagome's clumsy footsteps fade into the thicket.

"Kagome!" he shouted, voice echoing out into the night. His heart thumped in his chest. What the fuck was that idiot doing? She knew how dangerous it was to run off without him, knew that she was no match for any youkai who was out for blood. So what the hell did she think she could do?

His panic rose as her footsteps drifted out of earshot. His stomach churned. No matter how much he ripped at the arrow struck through his chest, it was no good.

He was stuck.

His ears swiveled as he tried to ignore the sounds of crickets and other night creatures. They were fucking loud as shit. Made it harder for him to pin Kagome's location.

How far would she go before she stopped chasing the fox runt? He would fucking tear her a new one when she got back.  _If_  she got back.

... _If_.

It wasn't just other youkai Inuyasha was worried about.  _She's so fucking weak, a bear could do her in, that fucking idiot_! he raged. How had he let her slip from his fingers so easily? She was it, his only fucking hope, his only chance of getting what he wanted. His only chance of survival.

...It had nothing to do with the fact that she seemed, somehow, to understand him.  _Really_  understand him. She had watched him practically tear the seeker wolf into two and still, despite her wide, tearful eyes, she'd moved towards him. Before he'd known it, got close enough to touch him.

" _I don't want you to fall back into what you were, Inuyasha,"_  she had said, standing up to his anger, " _before I pulled you out of the mirror. Remember? I don't want you to become what Kikyou made you."_

Had he really changed that much since first laying eyes on her, in the museum? He had wanted to kill her then, so confused at to what she was playing at, completely convinced she was Kikyou. But after all this time, after his frustration of wanting her dead, of realizing he needed her to accomplish his goal despite wanting nothing to do with her...

" _You're not the darkest parts of who you could_ become _."_

Her words had cut through him. Cut through his youkai. They pierced him, not unlike the arrow in his chest. She had gone from thinking he was a fucking daydream to being terrified of him, to… well…  _something else_.

He could still feel her hand in his, breaking through his defenses before pulling him into a hug.

Despite what he decided, that he wasn't going to dwell on the issue of how she made him feel, it filled him all the way up inside. The very idea that she was out there in the dark, alone, defenseless save for her shitty wooden arrows…

She'd be dead already if it wasn't for him. That fucking spider youkai would have killed her, like she'd said! That poison would have torn her up on the inside if he hadn't fucking sucked it out of her thigh! What the fuck was she thinking?

Inuyasha looked down at the arrow. It was stuck into him by trickery, although he could fucking  _feel_  that shit, that was for sure. But there was no bleeding. The place where the arrow struck him was neat and clean, even through his fire rat coat and his white tee underneath, it wasn't really  _torn_.

"Fucking foxes!" he roared, thrashing his body about to try and get free.

 _Sift, you idiot, sift!_  Argh, how could he have forgotten? He hadn't sifted in ages, there was no point to if he couldn't pinpoint the shards himself, and he wasn't about to sift into a possible den of enemy youkai, so it had been out of the question. But in order to get out of this ridiculous trap…

He closed his eyes, concentrating. He sifted.

...Except he didn't.

He was still stuck right fucking there on that stupid fucking tree with that stupid fucking arrow stuck through his goddamn chest and - _goddammit I'm going to kill that fucking fox when I get out of here, I'm going to hunt him down and rip him into two!_  Was it possible that the only way he could get free would to be sucked back inside the mirror?

The horror settled inside him like tar, thick and heavy and -  _fuck_  - he didn't want to even  _think_  about what that would mean. It was just moving from one shitty trap to an even shittier trap! He wouldn't be able to help Kagome then, and what, he'd just fucking sit there? For the wolves to find him? For Kikyou to track him down once she healed? Because despite the state that she'd been in when he last saw her, there was no way she wasn't still alive.

 _Fuck that_!

He was going to fucking dig it out of his chest.

His jaw clenched. His stomach lurched at the thought.

It was crazy, he knew it. Even his youkai was telling him he'd be better off dead. Because it was just that: a trick. The stupid arrow couldn't be real, they never were, coming from a fox.

His hand shaking, Inuyasha pressed a fingernail to his chest, right where the fake-arrow pierced his skin.

...It didn't help his nerve that it was struck right through where his heart should be.

It pounded loudly in its cavity, a  _thup, thup, thup_ , that filled his ears with each pump. Could he really do it? Could he dig it out?

 **Fool**.

"Yeah, I get it," he muttered.

A high-pitched shriek reached his ears, and Kagome's voice - " _no!"_  - pierced through the noise of the forest and cut right to him.

"Kagome!" he yelled, although he knew she couldn't fucking hear him. She was farther away than he hoped she was. " _Fuck_!" he growled, as his claw dug into his skin. There was no other fucking way to do it. She was in trouble, he wasn't going to just fucking sit here and let her die. His freedom was slipping through his fingers, his hope of leading any sort of normal life, his hope of, even if it wasn't supposed to be, having  _one_  person stay alive that knew him - actually  _knew_  him - was slowly fading.

"Argh!" he shouted, digging deeper into his own flesh. Blood poured through the wound, dripping down his chest and splattering into the dirt under him.

_I can sense them… they're here…_

Inuyasha's head whipped up, eyes glaring through the trees that surrounded him. That voice… It wasn't his youkai, it was… worse. Far worse.

_You have them… give them to me… the jewel… the jewel…_

What kind of fucking trap did that fox lead her into?

"No! Give it back!  _Give it back!_ " It was the runt, it had to be.

A few seconds later, he saw it. A flash of light. It was  _her_  light, he knew. He'd recognize that priestess shit anywhere. A  _pop_  echoed through the forest and the sickening sound of wet flesh splattering through the branches caught his ear.

 _Good girl, you fucking do it again, Kagome_ , he growled to himself. Hope wasn't lost yet. Because if she could just get back to him… if she was fighting to get back to him…  _I can rip this fucking thing out of my heart_ , he seethed.

This time he dug in with renewed resolve. The pain was unbearable. He clenched his teeth together, desperate not to allow himself to bite his tongue as he slowly inched his way closer to his heart. Deeper and deeper he gouged, bringing his other hand up to his mouth to bite onto his sleeve. He closed his eyes and screamed into it.

When his eyes opened, he thought he was hallucinating due to the pain.

Because there stood that fucking bastard fox. Eyes wide and terrified, tears running down his face, tiny hands clenched into fists.

"The fuck…?" Inuyasha panted, spitting out his sleeve.

"Y-you…" the runt started, pointing up to him, his brows drawn together in determination. "You better not kill me!"

"Kill you?" he spat, fingers slopping out of his open chest, "I'm not going to kill you. I'm going to  _fucking eat you._ "

He let out a terrified squeak and stepped back. Inuyasha watched as he seemed to waver, for his mind to figure out whatever shitty thought he was mulling over. He didn't have fucking time for this shit.

"Where's Kagome?!" he shouted down at the runt. "Where is she?!"

"Sh-she promised you wouldn't hurt me!" he cried, taking a step towards him. "You have to agree to her promise, 'cause otherwise she'll die and she's really nice and I like her and I don't want her to!" he wailed.

 **Fucking rip him apart** _ **,**_  his youkai seethed. But no, Kagome was in danger, and this little brat was the only one who could free him quickly. It wasn't too late, he could still get to her. He  _had_  to get to her.

"I won't kill you," he said, hating the words as they left his mouth. "I won't kill you, but you have to let me out or she'll die."

"Can you really save her?"

"I can save her. I can save her, so fucking let me out of here before it's too late!"

Tentatively, the fox moved towards him. He climbed up his legs and onto his chest. He gripped onto the fire rat coat with one hand and held out the other, fist closed, motioning for Inuyasha to hold out his hand.

"She told me to give these to you, she said you'd keep them safe."

He watched, wide-eyed, as the fox dropped the dirty, blood-covered shards into his open palm.

He felt his own blood pumping in his ears, felt his youkai start to push in at the edges.

**The Jewel… Consume it. We can save her if we consume it.**

He grit his teeth, his growing fangs piercing the skin of his lip as he bit back the transformation. If he let his youkai take over now, Kagome would not be safe. Not after he killed the youkai attacking her. His bloodlust would be too great. He would attack her next.

But still… he could…

**Do it…**

**DO IT!**

He brought the shard up to his nose. Inhaled.

It was  _her_  blood, and his youkai pushed him to taste it.

 _NO!_  He yanked them back from his face and covered his nose. He grabbed for a corner of his shirt, creating a small pouch with the white fabric and twisted them inside, tying it together so they hung at his hip. As soon as they no longer touched his skin the urge to use them lessened. He let out his breath, long and deep.

He almost didn't notice the fox reach out and grip the arrow with his free hand. It dissolved into nothing, a thin puff of smoke the only clue it had ever been there.

Inuyasha fell, grabbing onto the fox's tail before his hands and knees slammed onto the ground.

 **Fucking kill the fox!**  his youkai raged.

His back arched up as he pushed back against it, his vision seeping red, his claws digging desperately into the dirt as it threatened to take over. Drool frothed and spilled from his mouth as he fought back, snarling at it, forcing it to retreat. Now was not the time. It wasn't the fucking time! He ignored the fox's squeals, struggling to free himself from Inuyasha's grasp. He gave the runt a shake and hoped it hurt a lot.

"Get on my back," he panted, having gained better control, "and tell me what the fuck is attacking her!" He whipped the fox around and he gripped onto his shoulder without another complaint.

"It's a Naraku," he cried as Inuyasha took off through the trees, running faster than he ever had before, following her sent. "There's a lot more of them now, and we-"

"What the fuck is a Naraku?" he shouted as he ran.

"They're youkai who eat other youkai! They came out of nowhere over the last few weeks, and the wolves are scared of them, they're even careful when they patrol. They stay closer to home because of the Naraku!"

Keh. Scared. Inuyasha would show the youkai what fear meant. Whatever it was, it was about to fucking die.

Kagome screamed again.

"Fuck you!" she cried, " FUCK! YOU!"

His ears twitched, now having locked somewhat onto her position. He reached around and grabbed the fox. "Hold on tight," he said, then sifted.

He appeared only a few feet away, cursing his lack of accuracy. Just another sign that Kikyou's magic was fading.

Through the trees he saw her. A tentacle had wrapped around her neck and was squeezing her life away. Her bow was lying useless on the ground, her arrows broken and scattered, except for the one in her hand. She was stabbing at it with weakened arms, and it was doing nothing. He watched, running straight for her, as she tried to grip at the appendage with her hands, as she tried to force her powers into them.

"KAGOME!" he shouted, leaping through the air and throwing himself towards the tentacle. His claws lengthened into sharp knives and he drove them through the rubbery flesh, satisfaction seeping into every part of him as he ripped it apart.

It screeched, the bloody stump inching slowly back into the thicket, back to where its main body must be. He needed to get to it before it re-grouped itself, but he had to check on Kagome first.

He grabbed her and pulled her back towards him, looking her over. She was shivering. Freezing cold. But he couldn't see any sting wounds where toxins may have been applied. He didn't want another fucking spider incident happening again.

He breathed an inner sigh of relief to find that, while covered in a gross, gooey substance, she seemed to be whole. His arms wrapped around her, hugging her to him. Fuck, he'd been terrified he was too late.

"Kagome, hey," he said.

She was a mess, her face wet, her clothes and skin covered in that weird goop. She seemed fragile, like if he held her too tight he would break her. He wiped at her cheeks to get rid of the grime the youkai left behind. He needed her to talk to him, to tell him she was okay so he could go and murder the fucking bastard that did this to her. But she wasn't responding, and it sent another jolt of panic through him.

"Hey, hey, hey, look at me. Look at me." He gripped her jaw and turned her face towards him.

She opened her eyes. Weary blue gazed up at him. He watched as they slowly filled with water.

"Inuyasha," she said, a shaky hand coming up to touch his face. "You came."

What, she thought he'd just leave her there?

 _Of course she did, you idiot, it's not like you've been_ nice  _to her or anything._

These feelings… these  _feelings_  that he never wanted to feel… it was more than his crazy, intense, I-need-to-release-myself-after-300-years lust that he had felt until recently. Could he really hide it from himself anymore?

His wall was feeble, like the wall that separated himself from his youkai. He was on the edge, tipping over, willing to rip his fucking heart out to keep her safe. Could he  _really_  fool himself into thinking it was just about the damn jewel?

"Of course I came," he said, "what, you think I-"

Her hand moved from his cheek. She wrapped it behind his neck. Drew him to her.

He wouldn't be able to hold himself back if she broke him down. It was too raw right now, like the open wound he'd inflicted on himself. He was too raw.

But still, without a second thought she brought her lips to his, fresh tears leaking down her cheeks. He could smell the salt, could taste it as she kissed him.

Even this kiss, without the crazy drive to get into her pants, to feel her wrapped around him... it was different. Different, even, from the soft kisses he'd shared with Kikyou.

...Whom he had loved, right?

...Right?

He breathed her in, holding her lightly. She thought she was going to die, he knew. He could feel her relief. She was thanking him the only way her emotions knew how at this moment.

His youkai stayed asleep, deep inside him.

Inuyasha wanted to wrap her up in his coat and take her back to the cave before daybreak and have her fall asleep comfortable and safe in his lap. But he heard the tentacle youkai moving around, getting ready to strike. Reluctantly, he broke the kiss. His heart squeezed painfully at the look she gave him as he pulled away.

"Can you sit up on your own?" he asked

...Why was it so hard to catch his breath?

She nodded, eyes hooded like she was about to pass out. Not good.

"I can do anything you ask me to," she whispered, and he felt his youkai stir at her unaware submission to him. Still, he wasn't convinced she was telling him the truth. He didn't want to leave her alone, but he didn't have a choice right now. He couldn't chance the youkai coming for her again. He turned to the fox, put all the threatful force behind his words he could muster.

"Stay with her, runt. You protect her with your life, do you understand me?"

"I'll protect her with my life." he agreed, eyes steady.

"If you don't, I'll do worse to you than I'm about to do to this youkai," Inuyasha warned, letting the message really sink in.

"I got it, you  _stupid dog_. She saved my life, so I'll protect her with it!"

 _Huh_.  _Runt can be admirable after all._  He still wanted to throttle him for getting Kagome into this mess in the first place. It would just have to wait.

"I'll give it to you, fox," he had to admit, "you're brave for a little shit."

The fox clenched his jaw together and nodded.

"Stay here," Inuyasha turned to face the youkai in the dark.  _Naraku_ , the runt had called him. Absorbed other youkai, did he?

 _Well…_  he thought, his fangs dropping, his claws lengthening. He let his youkai leak through the built-up wall - just enough to really give this Naraku creature a good fight.  _We'll just have to see how he absorbs me!_

He lept.

.

.

Inuyasha stared down at the remains of the youkai.

...if he could even call it that.

Never in his life had he seen a youkai so vile as the one he just fought. It was fucking sick, the way all those disjointed bodies withered around inside the bloated mass of skin, as if they were encased in a balloon stretched too thin.

And yeah, it had a fucking shard. Goddammit, he couldn't see it anywhere in the mess that he'd made out of the youkai. He didn't want to make Kagome do it, but he could already see the blobs of gore moving, inching slowly towards each other. He turned and ran the few feet back to the tree he'd left her under.

She was doubled over with one hand pressed to her forehead. The runt was rubbing at her arms, trying to keep warm. Inuyasha picked him up and placed him on the ground, out of the way.

**Throw the little shit against the tree.**

He wanted to. Instead, he shrugged out of his fire rat coat and draped it over Kagome's shoulders. She was shivering, worse than before.

"Kagome, it has a shard, yeah?"

She looked up at him through her messy bangs, her teeth chattering, her lips slightly tinted blue. Fuck, why was she so cold? It's not like winter had fully kicked in yet, and they were pretty far down south. The night air wasn't  _that_  cold, so what the hell was going on with her?

She nodded. "I-I can f-f-feel it."

He scooped her up into his arms. "I'm going to take you to it, then we'll get out of here and get you warm. Can you hold on a little longer?"

Again, she nodded before leaning her head against his chest. Inuyasha clenched his jaw, an attempt to stop his pounding heart from giving him away as he lept back towards the remains of the youkai. He could hear the runt scampering after them.

He was conscious of his landing, his knees taking the brunt of the impact.

"Where is it?" he asked, although he could guess better now - the chunks of flesh had started lumping together in one spot, the smaller bits slowly tumbling their way across the forest floor towards it. Kagome confirmed his suspicions by pointing towards the blob.

"It's so bright," she mumbled, "it has Shippou's shard too. Make sure you get both of them."

He bit his tongue, wrestling the urge to reprimand her for admitting the shard belonged to the runt.

 **It's** _ **my**_   **shard,**  his youkai seethed, and Inuyasha agreed.

He extracted the two shards easily and the youkai remains stilled, now just raw chunks of flesh and gore.

**They're mine. Take them and release me. Release me!**

Kagome's hand on his arm. Her eyes gazing up at him, tired and worn. Slowly, she moved her fingers up to his hand, taking the shards between her thumb and index finger and pulling it gently from his grasp.

Inuyasha frowned, his youkai still berating him on the inside. It was unpleasant, always there, fighting to take control. It would be different once he completed the jewel and became full youkai. The voices would stop, because the voices would be his own.

And yeah, his youkai was a bit bloodthirsty, but with Inuyasha's full consciousness in control, he'd be able to control the bloodlust better. After all, the other youkai he had grown up around seemed fully in control over themselves, despite their views on humans in general.

...Despite their views on his mother.

He allowed Kagome to take the shards from him, watched her grip them into her palm. She sighed, before glancing back up at him. "I c-can't purify it r-right now," she said. "I-I'm too tired."

"Just hold onto it for now, we'll worry about it later. We gotta get you back to the cave, you're freezing. You must have a fever or something."

She shook her head, "n-no, take me to a st-stream, I n-need to rin-n-n-nse off."

"You can barely speak, I'm not letting you get in the cold water, you could-"

"I-I'm pretty sure i-it's the s-s-sl-slime," she chattered, pointing towards the fox at his feet. Inuyasha glanced down, his eyes widening as he noticed for the first time that the runt was shivering too.

"You've gotta fucking be kidding me," he spat, turning and heading away from the now-completely-dead youkai. They had passed a fairly deep stream not to far away, and he headed towards it.

"W-wait, Inuyasha-"

"Shut up and conserve your energy, you can't fucking die on me right now," he growled. Pushing through a clump of trees, he managed to find an area clear enough for him to jump up into the branches. He crouched down.

"N-no!" Kagome said. She reached up, her face contorting in pain, and yanked on his ear.

"Ah! Fuck! What the hell!" Inuyasha shouted, jerking back.

"T-take Sh-sh-shippou, don't l-leave him!" Her shivering was almost violent, her lips now fully blue. He didn't fucking have time for this.

"That little shit pinned me to a fucking tree! He almost got you killed! Let him turn blue and die, dammit!"

"H-he saved me!" She shivered again. Violently. But her steel eyes held steady to his. He set his jaw to hide the shock he felt. She kept fucking surprising him with her resolve. He wondered how angry she would be if he just left the runt behind anyway, but decided against it.

Air hissed through his teeth as he turned and marched back. He swept the shivering fox onto his shoulder.

"Fucking happy, you idiot?" he snapped. He didn't look down at her, but he knew she was smiling.

It didn't take very long to get to the river, but by the time he landed at the embankment, he was worried she wouldn't make it in time. Quickly he set her on the floor and shook the runt from his shoulder. Kagome immediately wrapped her arms around herself, trying to create friction with her hands, but it wasn't doing much. Inuyasha reached out to touch her forehead.

Her skin felt like ice.

"You're smarter than you fucking look," he growled, pulling her shoes off her feet, "your temperature is so low the water will probably actually be warmer than your skin." he reached out to grab the hem of her shirt but her hands stopped him. His eyes flicked up to hers.

"I-I can d-d-do it, don't look," she said.

He fingers gripped onto the cloth. "Are you kidding me? It's dark out!"

"Y-you can s-s-s-see in the dark!" Her shivering fingers stayed on his hands.

"Kagome. You can barely fucking move. You're obviously in pain. And fuck, it's not like I haven't..." He let his words trail off, felt the familiar stir at the apex of his hips. He cursed mentally. Now was not the fucking time to imagine the way he'd already touched her.

"I-Inuyasha!" She said, her voice insistent.

He threw his hands up in the air. "Fine! I'm turning my back, but I'm not leaving! And if I don't hear you getting into the water in twenty seconds, I don't care what you want me to see, I'm picking you up and fucking throwing you in." He turned his back to her.

He could hear her moving around, even over the sound of her teeth knocking together. His ears whipped back, listening as she slid off the embankment and stepped into the water.

"C-cold!" She cried. Then, "Sh-sh-shippou, come here! I-it's not very warm, but w-we need to get that gunk off you!"

He turned his head slightly, his teeth grinding together. "Oi, I can't undress you, but you're all for that little shit seeing you naked?" he yelled over his shoulder.

"I-if he d-dies, it'll be all your fault!" She shouted back at him. Weakly. Then she slipped.

He heard her fall into the water, her back flopping against the surface.

"Kagome!" the runt shouted, but Inuyasha was already up and undressing. He ran the short distance to the embankment and caught a glimpse of her black hair being swallowed up by the water, the current pulling her downstream.

"Fuck!" he cursed and lept as far as he could, diving into the deeper part of the river, the wound in his chest stinging brutally as the water rushed inside. He grit his teeth together as he came up for air, ignoring the pain and locking on to Kagome's bobbing head. The current wasn't even that strong, but dammit, he should have checked it first. Her body temperature was so low, there was no way she could have fought against it. Plus, it was freezing! He shouldn't have let her get in alone.

He swam fast and caught up to her easy, grabbing onto her wrist and yanking her to his chest, bringing them both up for air. She coughed and hacked against him and he slapped his hand against her back as the water left her esophagus.

"Dammit, Kagome, I can't take you anywhere," he growled, holding her tight as he side-stroked upriver with his free arm, "keeping you alive while Kikyou was after you was easier than this!"

"S-sorry," she said, wrapping her arms around him. She no longer seemed worried about her nakedness. Inuyasha kept his focus on the water rushing around him as he swam against the current, as Kagome pressed her face into his chest and inhaled deep.

"S-s-sorry," she repeated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, just a heads up, from now on I'll be posting a new chapter every week instead of every day. I was updating daily to catch up to where I am on FFN, which is at this point Chapter 36. I want to thank everyone for sticking with YITM so far here on Ao3, and I hope you continue to look forward to and read the new chapters each week. For now, work dictates that I post on Sundays. So, I'll see you all this Sunday with Chapter 37. Thank you again for all your kind kudos and words, they mean a lot to me!


	37. Numb

 

Kagome

The water rushed around her, her ankles brushing against riverbed plants and slippery, freshwater fish as they swam by. The water was cold, but Inuyasha's chest was warm. His hand was gripped tightly around her back, his fingers tangled in her hair as he held her head firmly above water. Her teeth chattered. A numbness had slowly begun to seep into her fingers and toes, and she wished fervidly that it had started instead at her throbbing hip and ribs.

She wanted to cry out every time Inuyasha's powerful arm pushed them forward, every time his legs kicked them closer and closer to where she'd initially fallen in. She bit her lip instead, drawing blood.

Shippou was sitting in the shallow edge of the river, his little hands gripping onto a rock as he watched Inuyasha tow Kagome back towards the embankment. She wanted to reach out to him, to let him know she was okay, but she was too cold, her limbs too numb, her hips and back too sore. She settled for the best smile she could muster, which wasn't much, but she did notice the relief on his face.

"Oi, you washed up?" Inuyasha yelled over the water. Shippou shook his head but immediately began to rinse himself off once he seemed satisfied Kagome was safe. He dunked his head under the water and started to rub his hands through his hair. He was done quickly, and pulled himself onto the grass, shaking the excess water off his body, just like a wild fox might.

Once they reached the edge, Inuyasha loosened his grip on her, and Kagome brought her trembling hands up to cover her breasts, despite the pain it caused. She hoped Inuyasha couldn't see her blush in the dark.

_What are you even worried about? This isn't the time to be self-conscious, just focus on getting clean and then getting warm!_

"Runt," Inuyasha growled over her chattering teeth, "You remember where the cave is? Go back and get a fire started."

"I can do it!" Shippou shouted.

"Go then, make sure it's big. Hurry!"

"I'm going!"

Inuyasha turned back to her. She could barely make his face out in the dark. "Kagome, grab onto the rock," he said, taking her hand in his and moving it to the rock himself. "Don't let go. I have to grab the shards real quick." He lept out of the water in one fluid motion. She could hear him ruffling through the pile of his clothing.

Kagome's arms trembled with the effort to hold herself in place. This was ridiculous, she felt so weak. Weaker than she normally did. She just wanted to lay down by a roaring fire wrapped up in her sleeping bag and doze off. She was sleepy… so sleepy...

She heard the tear of fabric, and then Inuyasha was back at the embankment, slipping into the water next to her, more silent than she would have thought possible. The jewel shards were in his cupped hand, the glow lit his body up as he re-submerged, and she couldn't help but notice in her half-awake state that he hadn't been naked like she was. He had on boxer briefs. No fair! She wanted to giggle, she could feel it bubbling up through her lips.

He drew his brows together in concern, cocking his head to the side. "What are you laughing at?"

"Boxer briefs," she said, giggling again. Oh my gosh, her ribs hurt. That thought made her laugh even more.

"Oi, you going crazy or what?" he growled, moving closer and leaning over her.

That's when she noticed the open wound in his chest. She reached out slowly to touch the irritated skin around it, but she couldn't keep her grip on the rock with one hand.

A squeak escaped her lips as her footing slipped out from under her, her chin dipping below the surface before Inuyasha grabbed onto her arm and kept her up.

"What are you doing?" he snapped, his lip pulled back in disgust.

"You're hurt!" she said, water sputtering from her lips. "What happened?"

"Keh, don't worry about it!" He leaned in and sniffed, eyes widening as he pulled back a little. "Shit," he said. "You'll be frozen soon. We have to get this gunk off you."

"Mmm," Kagome said. Inuyasha had such a nice voice. It was sad, that his voice was so nice but his chest had a hole in it. His hair was also nice. It was plastered to his face, wet and heavy. It made his ears look bigger. She wanted to touch them again. Not yank them like she did earlier, but to  _really_  touch them. Would he let her, if she tried?

She reached a hand up even though it hurt, although really, it didn't hurt so much anymore. The pain was kind of fuzzy, and less sharp, and…

She was shocked when he slapped her hand away.

"Hey," she said weakly.

He shook her shoulder, and her brain snapped back momentarily.

"Kagome, stay with me. You're losing it."

"I'm fine," she said, waving his concern away although fear jolted through her. She was sure she still had feet, but she couldn't feel them.

"You're not fine, you're acting like an idiot." He waved the shards in front of her face. "Can you hold them or are your fingers too numb?"

"No, I can hold them," she said, teeth chattering.

"Dammit," he cursed, dropping them into her open hand. "why are you so fucking cold?"

"I-it's gotta be the goo," she said as he pulled her back out to deeper water.

"Fucking youkai. That thing was a piece of work. I've never seen anything like it. Hold your breath," he directed before slowly maneuvering her head underwater.

Kagome closed her eyes as she dipped under, trusting him to keep hold of her. She felt his hands through her hair, gently rubbing what remained of the youkai away before lifting her back up. He focused on her face next, wiping the rest of the residue away that he hadn't gotten earlier, when he had rescued her -  _again_  - and pressed his lips to hers.

Another giggle threatened to escape, thinking of his lips on her own.

Inuyasha shot her another concerned look, but he didn't ask. "This stuff is fucking gross," he said instead, "here, lift up your arm." He lifted it out of the water for her, wiping away at her skin.

"S-sorry," she said, the tiredness seeping back into her. Sleep. Yeah, she wanted to sleep. She was so tired. She needed to keep a good grip on the shards, because Inuyasha told her to and she didn't want him to think she was more of an idiot than he already thought she was. She watched under hooded eyes as he worked diligently. "Sorry that I'm so weak."

"Shut up."

It was probably meant to sound harsher than it did, because he refused to look at her. It was too late. He already thought she was an idiot. Weak and an idiot.

"No, I'm s-sorry," she insisted, "I r-really am. If I w-wasn't s-so weak-"

"Kagome, seriously, shut up and save your damn energy, okay?"

"M-mhm," she muttered, giving up and allowing him to work in silence. When he was done with the first arm, he lifted the second. Her fingers were still wrapped tightly around the shards.

Finally done, he pulled her back towards the grassy, muddy edge. She relaxed and let him pull her in. If she closed her eyes, she could almost imagine she was floating on the river that her parents used to take her to when she was young. She barely registered that he pulled her out of the water. She barely registered that he wrapped her in his fire-rat coat.

He was saying her name. Well, she thought he was, maybe… She couldn't really make out what he was saying, but it was definitely his voice. She couldn't really see him anymore, he was a big, white blur. She could almost make out the wound on his chest, though.

...How had he gotten that wound?

.

.

Burning.

She was burning.

Her head was burning up.

Pain at her hip, pain at her shoulder, pain thrusting its fingers through her ribs and she was unable to scream.

A cool towel on her forehead. A whisper in her ear. A chant, really. A language she'd never heard before. Claws brushing through her hair, fingertips rubbing at her temples.

His name was on the tip of her tongue. She wanted to call out to him. It was  _his_  voice whispering to her, it was  _his_  voice chanting the strange words she couldn't place. She was in so much pain.

It lasted forever.

And then she opened her eyes.

A rocky, cracked ceiling, with deep, dark shadows flickering along with the fire that burned at the mouth of the cave. She was on her back, her sleeping bag tucked tightly around her shoulders.

"What…" she asked, but her throat was dry and her voice cracked.

She heard shuffling off to her side, and turned her head, squinting towards the fire. Inuyasha stepped inside and placed an armful of firewood at the edge, feeding the flames with each log he threw in.

"Inuyasha?" she called out to him. His head snapped up and his eyes widened.

"Oi, you're awake," he said moving to her side and kneeling down beside her.

"What… what happened?" she asked as he grabbed for a bottle of water.

"Don't you remember anything?" He placed his hand under her back and helped her to sit up. Her sleeping bag slid down, gathering at her waist and exposing her torso.

The air hit her skin and she looked down. Her breasts and ribs were bandaged tightly, so were her hips. She blushed furiously and grabbed at the sleeping bag, bringing it up to cover her chest.

"I'm… naked…" she said, face beet red.

"Yeah, well, I had to get to your wounds. Your ribs were definitely broken, you're lucky none of them punctured a lung. And your hip was in bad shape too." He tightened his jaw as he handed the bottle of water to her. "What the fuck did that thing do to you?"

Kagome reached a hand out and took the bottle from him. He'd opened the top for her, and she eagerly drank from it, nearly draining the whole thing before moving it away from her lips.

"It grabbed me and lifted me up pretty high. When I shot it with the arrow it dropped me," she said. "I was actually pretty lucky I hit all those branches on the way down, a drop straight to the ground might have killed me."

Inuyasha's fingers had tightened into fists, a muscle working at his jaw. "I have to recheck your wounds," he finally said.

Kagome stared at him, the realization of what he'd done finally clicking into place. "You… you healed me?" she asked, "Like how you healed Sango and Hojou?"

He didn't answer.

"Was I really that far gone?"

"You'd gone into hypothermia, basically. I had to…" he cleared his throat, his eyes flicking away from hers, "I had to use my body heat to get you warm before I could even attempt to heal your wounds."

"I… uh…" the thought of his naked body pressed up against hers, together in the sleeping bag caused her to forget what she was going to say.

"Healing your insides took a long time though. You've been out for a week."

"A week?" she cried, eyes widening.

He huffed and sat back, one knee propped up and his hands supporting his weight behind him. "Remember what I told you before? About how I was pretty sure Kikyou's magic would start to weaken once she was unable to re-weave the mirror spell?"

Kagome nodded.

"It's happening. I couldn't tell at first, 'cause since entering Wolf Territory there've been enough deep caves for us to take shelter in. The sun hasn't been able to reach me at daytime, so I didn't had a chance to test the theory. But after the runt freed me from the arrow and I sifted to where you were…." his voice trailed off, his eyes glazing over as if he were living that moment all over again.

"What happened?" she asked after a few seconds of silence.

He shook his head, back to the present, "I came in off-mark. I had you pinpointed, I should have been able to sift right next to you, but I was way off."

"You got close enough, though. I mean, you got to me in time."

"Barely," he growled, bringing his hand up to run his fingers through his hair. The corners of his mouth were pulled down, his brows drawn together. "Only a few seconds later, and..." he was gone again, back to that moment.

Kagome wondered what it had looked like to him, appearing only to see her being strangled to death. She tried to smile. She wanted to comfort him somehow. "I'm fine. You saved me. You don't have anything to worry about, I can still help you find the jewel shards. We can still break the mirror spell."

He didn't speak, eventually getting up from her side and rummaging through her backpack for something.

Kagome took the chance to look around the cave. It was a different one than the one they had taken shelter in before Inuyasha had run off after the squirrel. It was wider, and when Kagome glanced outside, she couldn't see any sloping forest ground. It was dark out, but the floor seemed to stop abruptly at the mouth of the cave.

Then it clicked. "Where's Shippou?" she asked, eyes widening in fear. The last she'd seen of him Inuyasha had ordered him back to the cave to get a fire started.

"Keh, little shit's out scouting the area a bit. It's dumb because I've got the area under control, but he keeps going on and on about being brave and he won't fucking shut up about it."

Kagome tried to hide her smile but failed. "It's because you told him he was."

"I doubt it," he snorted, standing triumphantly from her bag holding a packet of instant noodles. "He wouldn't keep his hands off of you once I got you back into that cave, I had to threaten to tear his throat out if he didn't leave you alone."

"Hey, be nice to him-"

"It was for your own good, I had zero time to deal with him being a blubbering idiot," he said, pouring another bottle of water into the steel cup he held in his hands and breaking the ramen into small bits to fit in as well.

"Couldn't you just ask him to stop?"

"He's a youkai, Kagome, not a human. Youkai are predatory, all of our instincts run on dominant and submissive signals. Just asking him to stop was not going to do it."

"But he's so young."

"Doesn't matter." Inuyasha held the cup over the edge of the fire, the contents inside slowly cooking. "Youkai is youkai."

"Well when will he get back?" she asked, wincing as she tried to turn and face him some more. "I want to thank him for helping me.

"Don't thank him," he growled, his lip pulling up, baring a fang, "he pinned me to a fucking tree and then attracted that fucked-up youkai. You almost died because of that little shit."

Kagome could see the frustration clearly on his face. She paused. Her wording would be important and she didn't want to push him to anger. "He lost his mom, you know," she finally said, eyes locked on his face for any signs of change, "both his parents are gone."

Inuyasha didn't say anything, but his back stiffened and his frown deepened.

"He was crying out for his mom when I found him. Both his parents are dead. He's just a lost little child, Inuyasha. He's scared, even though he doesn't want to admit it."

He pulled the cup away from the fire and set it down next to him, allowing it to cool. Kagome could smell the familiar aroma of cooked noodles and chicken spice. Her stomach growled, noting how hungry she was.

"So what's that got to do with us?" he replied, looking down at the cup, his brows still knotted together. "Youkai are violent by nature. A lot of us live without our parents."

Kagome's eyes widened, her heart twisting in her chest. She hadn't really thought of it, the idea that Inuyasha may not have parents himself. She had just assumed one of his parents were still alive, what with him being hanyou and all.

"Runt is just a byproduct of youkai nature," he said, checking the contents of the cup before standing and bringing it to Kagome. "He'll struggle to survive, and he either will or he won't. Fox youkai aren't like Inu youkai, or like Wolf youkai. They're not a pack creature, they stay as smaller families, and usually stay solitary when the rest of their family dies off."

Kagome took the cup and inhaled, picking up the chopsticks he'd shoved in and swirling the noodles around, thinking about what he said. It didn't seem like he knew Shippou had been taking shelter with the wolves. She wasn't sure if she should tell him or not, but decided to tuck the information away, when the time was right. She didn't want him to chase Shippou away, not before she got the chance to talk to the little fox herself.

"Eat quickly," he said sitting next to her again. "I need to check your wounds to make sure the ointment is working."

She was still sore, but, "I thought you healed me?"

"Keh, yeah, your insides, although it took forever. I don't have Kaede's powers to draw from, and as I said, my own are weakening. I couldn't do much about your bruises. The ointment should work on those eventually." He reached out and brushed his fingers across her collarbone, and Kagome's eyes fluttered up to meet his.

There was something in his gaze she couldn't place, and her thoughts wandered to when he had pulled her close to him, when she had pulled him down towards her, demanding he kiss her.

And he had.

He'd kissed her.

Her face felt hot, she knew she was flushed. It was crazy, that just his touch could do that to her. But isn't that what she'd decide as he answered her with his kiss? Didn't she decided that she couldn't live another day without him touching her as he was now?

"Eat," he said, pulling away from her.

She ate. Once her stomach was full and happy, Inuyasha pulled out the ointment and moved to her other side, scooting close to her so he could get a better look.

"Raise your arm," he instructed. She did as she was told. He ran his claw slowly down her side, careful not to knick her skin. Kagome held the bandaging at her chest, still somewhat embarrassed that she was laid so bare to him. For what it was worth, he held his gaze steady, his eyes focused on her bruise.

She gasped when she saw it - a deep, ugly purple and black, splotched and angry. It blossomed out from her right side, like ink spots or dark watercolor, and moved under her breasts where she couldn't see it.

"Oh," she breathed, "that looks bad."

He huffed, "bad is an understatement. Although it actually looks better than when I first got a good look at 'em." He dipped his fingers into the ointment and began to spread it evenly over her blotted skin.

She hissed as he worked it over her. "It's cold," she said.

"Suck it up."

Kagome bit her lip, watching him work. He was being gentle again. Treating her as if she were breakable. As if she were glass.

...What was he thinking right now? Was he remembering their kiss? Was he playing it back in his head, like she was? Did he want her to pull him in again? To kiss him again?

She had done it out of pure relief before, that he'd come for her. That he'd saved her. But maybe she'd been too forward, even though he'd responded?

Argh, she needed to cool it. Despite her promise to him that she'd resist whatever it was she was feeling, it wasn't so easy to do. And now that she was safe and not delirious from almost dying, and then from the bitter cold she felt while covered in the youkai goop… Why was it still so hard? Why was she still struggling so much?

It didn't help that he was treating her so gently. Even though he had his motives, he didn't have to be so nice to her. He didn't have to treat her like she mattered.

When he was done with her side, he moved to her hips, cutting away at the bandages, and carefully treating the matching bruise. He helped her to re-bandage her wound, careful to keep his eyes averted.

Once done, she was instructed again to sleep, and given a mug of Kaede's tea. It helped to calm her nerves, to drift her eyes shut, wound up in the sleeping bag as she was. Inuyasha stood at the mouth of the cave, keeping watch.

As she drifted off, she couldn't help the rejection she felt. She wouldn't have minded if he'd tried to glance her way while she was so exposed to him.

She wouldn't have minded at all.

.

.

_The youkai held her up. High up above the trees. The air was brutally cold up there, it whipped her hair around her face, forcibly blowing it this way and that. She tried to push it away from her eyes, to see where the tentacle came from._

_That same pitch-black darkness, that nothingness her eyes could not penetrate. Her arms shook as she nocked her arrow. As she drew back. Her powers welled up inside her, they moved fluidly from her chest, into her arms and towards the arrowhead, lighting it up, the only heat in the dark._

_She released._

_Inuyasha flew from the treetops, arching across the sky below her. His claws were extended as he leapt, his eyes down on his prey._

_Her arrow careened down._

_She screamed his name, warned him to get out of the way._

_It struck him in the back. It pushed through his fire rat coat and his skin, and exploded from the other side, his guts spraying out onto the darkness below him. She could smell his burnt flesh as he turned in midair, his eyes wide and horrified with betrayal._

_He fell._

_Down, down, down into that darkness. He disappeared inside it. Swallowed up whole._

" _NO!" She screamed, struggling to break free. She didn't mean to! She didn't mean to! She had no idea he was there, he should have been safe, pinned to the tree! He should have been safe!_

" _Inuyasha!" she cried, her face soaked with her tears. What was the point of living anymore? What was the point of fighting?_

_It shot out the darkness, a second tentacle. An incredible speed, too fast for her to see. It struck her in her stomach. Straight through. Just like her arrow had to Inuyasha._

_She could feel it inside her, moving around where her organs should be. She could feel it throbbing and pushing, could feel her blood rushing out from her wound, pouring over her hips and down the tentacle._

_A third reached up above her, and her head tilted back to watch it, sure that any moment now she'd be free of the pain she felt. This one was thicker. Something was inside of it, moving around, stretching the skin, desperate to break free._

_A hand thrust through the blubber, clawing its way outside. He emerged from the appendage, white hair stained with blood and guts, ears torn and limp, eyes red and fangs protruded._

_He had broken free. His stomach was gaped open to match her own, his skin charred where her powers had burned through him._

" _Inu...yasha…?" she called out to him, raising a shaking hand. If she could just touch him… touch him before her eyes died out to the rest of the world…_

_But he was part of the youkai now, his sense of self gone._

The jewel…  _it was that same depraved voice, although his lips moved to match the words._ The jewel… It is mine… give it to me…

_Inuyasha reached out a clawed hand and wrapped his fingers around the glass vial. He yanked it from her neck, causing her body to jerk forward. Blood sprayed from her lips, splattering against his face._

_He didn't even blink._

_He reached out his other hand and pressed his fingers in between her lips. Past her teeth, her jaw forced open. He pushed in, down her throat, shoving and shoving, and she knew this was it. Her body was no longer her own. She, too would become a monster._

_His fingers pressed in further, tearing her throat open._

_She screamed._

"Dammit, wake up!"

His red eyes were over her, his hands reaching for her. Kagome jerked back, flipping onto her stomach and desperately trying to crawl away. Her fingernails scratched against the ground, her legs tangled in the tentacle - no - her sleeping bag. Her face was wet and her chest heaving, her sobs echoing against the cave walls.

"Oi, Kagome!" he shouted, leaping over her head and blocking off her exit.

She pressed herself up, sitting away from him, her legs still tied together. Her eyes found his.

They weren't red, they were gold, and soaked with concern. He held his hands up, a physical sign that he wasn't going to hurt her.

"You know where you are?" he asked, his voice low and calm.

"I…" she breathed between sobs, "I… I'm in the cave," she said, the world around her finally connecting the pieces and making sense again. Inuyasha's shoulders visibly relaxed, his hands dropping slightly.

"And you know who I am?"

She nodded, her eyes filling with tears. Her nightmare had been horrifying. She had felt every part of it. Her powers releasing, the tentacle thrusting itself through her body, Inuyasha's fingers forcing their way down her throat…

She brought shaking hands up to her face, her sobs turning to panicked breaths, faster and faster as the nightmare flared again behind her eyes.

"S-sorry," she cried, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" It was all her fault. Everything was her fault. Everyone was going to die because of her, everyone was going to die. She didn't want to do it anymore. She wanted to go home. She didn't want to see everyone she knew wiped out by the evil that had shown itself, and really, just her and Inuyasha against… against  _that_ …

He was strong, but he was also somewhat under Kikyou's control. If she managed to catch up with them… if she managed to take him back…

His hands were on her then, wrapping her up in them, the way he had when he'd rescued her from the youkai. He held her close to his chest, applying pressure as her breathing accelerated.

"Hey, it's okay," he whispered in her ear, a growl rumbling inside him. "It's okay Kagome, it's okay. You're safe."

"I'm sorry, I thought you were... I thought-"

"It's okay, just breathe. Focus on my breathing. Breathe with me."

She nodded, sucking in air as he did through her nose, long and deep. It took a few tries before she caught on to his pattern, and she struggled to keep his slow pace. But he stayed with her. She was leaning back against him, his cheek resting lightly on her head, his arms allowing her to breathe yet iron-solid and unyielding, as if worried she'd make another break for the cave entrance.

Slowly, slowly her heart calmed, the rhythm almost matching his. She breathed in deep with him, her tears lessening as the nightmare became just that.

"I'm okay," she finally said. "I'm okay now."

"Nightmare?" he asked, arms staying in place.

She nodded again. She didn't want to tell him what he had done, didn't want the image in his head, like it was in hers. "The youkai, with the tentacles…"

"It can't get to you here," he said, growling again, deep in his chest. It was comforting. It calmed her. She wondered if he was doing it on purpose.

"I know. I know, I just… It was so real."

"You want me to make you some tea?"

She shook her head, the panic slowly creeping back in. "No. No, I don't want to sleep. I don't want to sleep anymore."

"Okay," he said, trying to quell her rising panic. His growl vibrated against her back. "No tea. I should probably change your bandages again anyway."

Yes. Anything but sleep right now. She nodded, and he slowly moved from her side. The fire had died down and daylight streamed in through the mouth of the cave. Inuyasha had moved everything back away from the sunlight while she slept. Now he rummaged through her pack, searching for the ointment.

She expected him to kneel at her side like he had when he changed her bandages before, but he returned instead behind her, his legs coming around either side and pulling her back against his chest again.

She couldn't help the swell of yearning that threatened to overwhelm her. What was he doing, being so kind again? She wanted more.

As she relaxed into him, he moved her arm, and slowly ripped away the bandage. He stilled for a moment, probably waiting for her to cover herself like she had earlier.

She didn't.

 


	38. The Way We Feel

 

Inuyasha

 

Inuyasha froze, just for a split second before he continued spreading the ointment over the dark bruise that covered Kagome's ribs. He forced himself to keep his breathing even, to keep his eyes averted.

Her face was still wet. Her breathing still ragged. She wasn't thinking right. That's why she wasn't covering herself up.

**She's offering herself to you.**

_No she's not_ , he snapped at his youkai. He wrestled it back, gritting his teeth together as he kept his concentration on his task.

 **Pathetic** , his youkai sneered, gaining just a sliver of control. He prayed to whatever Gods might hear him that Kagome wouldn't be able to feel him harden through his jeans. He already felt like a piece of shit for not getting to her sooner, for not realizing how severe her situation was at the river, for no longer having the ability to heal her completely, like he may have had working together with Kaede, or even if he had still been under the influence of the mirror. He didn't want her to think he couldn't control himself on top of that.

She knew his youkai wanted him to kill her, he had screamed as much to her when he'd practically dismembered the seeker wolf. But she wasn't aware of his youkai's…  _other_  desires, and he was sure she'd run screaming in the other direction if she knew just how intense the urge was to take her whether she wanted him to or not. There was a crack in the wall between himself and his youkai, and every moment it crumbled and cracked just a little bit more.

What made the whole thing worse was the fact that he constantly felt it, even when she was doing normal things, like sleeping. This time had been no different, even while she was in the midst of her nightmare.

When she began to thrash around in her sleeping bag at mid-day, his first thought was that his healing had somehow gone wrong, and she was having a seizure. But one look at her face and he could immediately tell she was stuck in an awful nightmare. Her hands were clawing at her throat, her mouth wide open in fear…

**Would have been so easy then.**

_Fucking sick bastard._

He shook the image from his head and did his best to keep his fingers from trembling as he helped Kagome to slowly lift both her arms above her head. It stretched her torso. He noticed her wincing, noticed the way she bit her lip. The positioning was uncomfortable for her, but it gave him easier access to the skin below her breasts. It was blue and purple and blotchy, just like her side was. Just like her shoulder. Just like her neck and her hip.

His ears picked up her voice, but it was so mumbled he couldn't understand.

"What was that?" he asked, keeping his voice as low as possible. The fragileness he'd sensed after he'd freed her from the Naraku youkai was still there. If he was too harsh with her now, she would break.

"I look awful," she said. She was watching his fingers as they slid across her skin. She shivered, goosebumps breaking out across her path he drew. He resisted the incredible urge to move up higher, to feel that same softness that he had felt pressed against him many times before.

"You look fine," he said, his voice thick and heavy with a yearning he didn't fucking understand. Why was it so strong when it came to her? Why couldn't he go a fucking moment without wanting to… Goddammit, he was spiraling out of control. "Think of them as battle scars. It's proof you fought and won."

" _You_  fought and won," she corrected with a heavy sigh.

"Shut up. You fought too. You held it at bay long enough for me to get there."

He felt her shiver underneath him as he pushed her pajama bottoms down to remove the bandage around her hips. They relaxed around her waist, into the fold of her legs. He carefully pushed them aside, just enough to get to the worst of the bruising.

He bit back another growl. He could fucking smell her arousal. For the first time he could ever remember, he wished he had a weak, human nose.

 _Don't let her fucking see it_ , he chanted, his jaw locking again and shifting so she wouldn't feel him harden against her. He methodically moved onto her shoulder, then her neck, careful with his claws. Careful with his eyes.

Always fucking careful.

Once he was done, he closed the ointment up and set it to the side, picking up the bandages and re-wrapping up her chest. He waited for a split second to see if she wanted to do it herself, but her arms stayed where they were - up and out of the way.

 **Submissive, like she should be** , his youkai salivated.

Once he finished bandaging her chest and hip, he grabbed his fire rat coat. He'd been using it as a pillow, still refusing to use Kagome's ridiculously good smelling one. He wrapped the coat around the both of them and leaned back against the cave wall, leaving them with a slight incline so she could rest comfortably.

"You should try to sleep some more," he said, again being mindful of his voice. He was afraid of sounding too harsh. It might cause her to panic like she had during her nightmare. He needed her sharp. If she panicked out here in the wild at the wrong time, she would die.

And that sure as fuck wasn't happening.

"No way," Kagome said, despite the tiredness he detected in her voice. "I can't sleep. I can't close my eyes."

He huffed, feigning annoyance. "Fine, but it's boring, there's nothing for you to do but sit here, and we're not leaving until you're healed up. Or until a wolf comes along and we're forced out."

She twisted in his lap so her cheek pressed against his chest, and wrapped her arm over his side, her hand resting at his hip. "Didn't you have a wound…? she asked, her voice trailing off after the question. "I could have sworn you were bleeding from your chest, but… s'kinda hazy…"

He thought about telling her how he had practically resolved to rip through his own heart just to get to her in time, but shoved that idea aside real quick. What good would it do, to admit something so ridiculous to her? "Keh," he finally said, "I'm hanyou, remember? I heal fast."

Part of him wanted her to know. Part of him wanted her to know just how much he… ugh… how much he  _needed_  her with him.

**You can taste her, can't you? She's already on your tongue. Take her.**

He breathed deep, ignoring the voice that scratched annoyingly at the back of his head. He should position her back to the way she had been, it would be easier to control his youkai if he did. But he could feel her breath through his white tee as she snuggled closer to him.

 _Fuck, she's cute_.

**And willing.**

Who was he kidding? Despite the sickening shit his youkai whispered to him, he wasn't going to push her away.

He didn't fucking want to.

"Can we just… talk about stuff?" she asked, her voice breaking through the battle going on in his head. He could smell the beginning of her tears, the added salt to her other scents.

"Yeah," he huffed. At this point he'd agree to do anything to keep her from crying again. "What do you want to talk about?"

She bit her lip again, she was doing that a lot.  _He_  wanted to bite that lip. Not bad, but just…  _nip_  at it. Gently. He stifled another growl, stifled the instinctive possessiveness that surged up inside him.

"I don't know," she finally said, relaxing a bit more against him and letting out a heavy sigh before adding: "you're warm." Her heartbeat was calm and steady, despite the arousal he smelled.

"Course I'm warm," he said, breathing in deep. If he was going to torture himself with her scent, he might as well  _really_  torture himself. "I'm like an oven."

He felt her shake against him and realized she was giggling. "How do you even know what an oven is?"

"Keh, we had ovens back then. Granted, they weren't the fancy, electric things they are now, but all you need is a hole in the ground and some dirt to hold the heat in."

"You don't talk much about the past, you know, like about when you were little."

He frowned. It wasn't a conversation he wanted to have. It was painful, remembering how he had managed a life that was somewhat peaceful before he'd gone and fucked everything up. "You don't want to hear about that shit," he said.

"But Inuyasha, it's not every day that I get to hear what it was actually like to live back then… in the Edo, period, right? That's what the guide said."

Although it wasn't his favorite subject, he was kinda surprised she was so interested in his early life. He glanced down at her face and saw the corners of her lips pulled up.

"Keh," he said, trying not to think about how her smile made his insides feel. "It was boring."

"I don't believe you, the Edo period was one of the more exciting periods. There was a reign of peace for like, 200 years. Japan opened itself up to trade with the Americans."

He rolled his eyes before sighing long and deep. "Fine, if I tell you about some of it, will you shut up and sleep?"

"I don't want to sleep," she said, "but if you tell me about it, I'll try." It was a lame half-promise in a soft, tired voice.

Her hand moved slightly, and he struggled to keep his breathing even as her skin brushed against his. He was hyper-aware of everywhere she touched him, even through his clothes.

"I did live through the Edo period," he eventually said after gaining a bit more control of himself, "although I spent half of it inside the mirror. I was actually born near the end of the Muromachi period."

"In the 1500's?"

"Yeah, early 1500's, although I can't tell you the exact date. The Edo period began about one-hundred years later."

Kagome nodded against his chest, "Yeah, 1603, if I remember from history class correctly."

He couldn't help the slow chuckle that rumbled up from inside him. "History class, huh?" he said.

"What's so funny?" she asked.

"Dunno. The thought of you sitting in school with a bunch of other kids learning about my time period, I guess." He shrugged; "For the most part I watched from the mirror as the Edo period passed me by. You're right that once the Americans arrived, things became more exciting. There was a lot of protest and activism fighting against Japan opening its trade to the American ships."

"Mmm," she agreed, "there's a famous poem that was written at that time, I think it went something like: 'It is disgusting, the agitation over thread…' but I can't remember the rest…"

"By the silkworm farmer, yeah."

"You know of it?"

He shrugged again, "I had a lot of disposable time. I did a lot of reading. The poem goes: 'It is disgusting, the agitation over thread in today's world. Ever since the ships from foreign countries came for the jeweled silkworm cocoons to the land of the gods and the Emperor, People's hearts, awesome though they are, are being pulled apart-"

"-and consumed by rage," she finished for him, tilting her chin up to catch his eyes. "It's weird that you can recite poetry."

"Weird? It's weird that you study that time as if it was so long ago," he replied, eyebrow raised.

"Wasn't it?" she asked, eyes locked on his, "so long ago?

Inuyasha thought about it for a moment. "Guess so, although maybe because I lived it, it doesn't seem like it's been that long?" He frowned, his vision blurring slightly as his mind wandered to his past. It was still clear as day to him. His mother's voice. The little hut they shared together. Even the few memories of his father were like sharp movies in his head, playing over and over again. "Or maybe because of my youkai, time just doesn't seem to pass by like it does for you…? Anyway, it was a pretty bloody time for humans, both with civil war and with youkai roaming freely. In my home though… I mean, it was pretty peaceful, I guess."

"Who was human? Your mom or your dad?"

He guessed there was no real reason not to talk about his parents, even though it left a sour taste in his mouth. "...My mom," he eventually admitted. "I think that, in our circumstance, it was peaceful because I was somewhat isolated from both humans and youkai. There  _are_  other hanyou, with one parent human and other youkai, but not many. So few that I've only seen a handful of others over the years. We're looked down on from both full-blooded humans and full-blooded youkai. We're an abomination, you know? Not meant to be. My mother knew this instantly, which is why we lived separately from others."

"...I don't think you're an abomination."

"Yeah, well, I'm one of the lucky ones," he said. "Some of them have the ugly parts of youkai, mixed in with less human traits. Not all of them turn out as pretty as I am." He grinned when Kagome rolled her eyes at him, secretly relieved that some of her typical playfulness was coming through. "But despite that, it's still true. I'm still an abomination. Hated due to my strength and...  _otherworldliness_ , I guess, by full humans. Hated due to my humanness by full youkai."

Being born was almost a death sentence for him, and it was certainly so for his mother. It didn't help that hiding his ears was almost impossible. Covering them for too long left them aching and sore. Usually caused a headache.

"They wouldn't hate you if they knew you."

He feigned indifference. "Keh. They don't want to get to know me. They don't want me around."

"That's terrible," Kagome said.

Inuyasha raised his eyebrow, locking his eyes to hers. He tried to detect some sort of hint that she was being insincere, but… there was none. He'd been forced to spend so much time with her, he knew she didn't say things she didn't mean. But he was still surprised that she meant it.

"You know," he said, "I actually believe you think so."

She pushed herself off his chest and winced, her hand coming up to touch her neck. "Of course I think so," she said. She seemed irate that he'd accuse her of anything else. "What do you take me for?"

"I take you for human." Because even though she was different, even though he'd seen her kindness time and time again, even though, despite the fact that her friends had tricked her into handing him over to Kikyou, she had run back to him. Desperately tried to save him. Even though all of that happened, she was still human. And humans still thought lesser of hanyou, just as youkai did.

"Is that why you called me racist back at the museum?" she guessed.

Right on the mark. "Why would I think you'd be any different?"

"You can't generalize all humans as the same. It's natural to fear things we don't know. But I... I  _know_  you."

He felt heat slowly inch its way up his neck. "Keh," he said, looking away from her. "You don't know me."

"I do too," she insisted. "I know a lot about you."

"Oh yeah?" he couldn't help himself, "Like what?"

She turned so she could get a better look at him, then hesitated.

...What the hell was she going to say? He didn't want to admit it, he tried hard not to think about it, but it was fucking impossible not to wonder what she actually thought of him.

"I know you loved her. I know that you weren't to blame for her death."

It was a punch to his gut.

He struggled to keep himself in check, clenched his teeth against his initial reaction, his back stiffening. She didn't have to say that bitch's name, it was obvious who she was talking about.

"Yeah?" he growled, instead of getting up and leaving, which is what he really wanted to do. "Why do you say that?"

She blinked up at him, wide-eyed and innocent, as if she didn't fucking know what she was saying, as if she didn't know what she was doing to his insides. "Kaede told me what happened."

"Kaede needs to keep her mouth shut," he spat, "old hag." It was none of Kaede's fucking business, going around and running her mouth like that. His history was his alone. It wasn't hers to tell.

"If you're going to be mad, be mad at me." Kagome's lashes dropped to cover her gaze, as if embarrassed. "I'm the one who asked about it. Besides, she doesn't think you were to blame either."

"Keh, she didn't tell you the whole story then, because she lead the mob that chased me away from the village." He could see it clear as day even now. Kaede had been much younger, her hair inky black to match her sister's. She held a torch of her own, her eyes accusatory and filled with hate, ready to burn him alive for something he hadn't even done.

"No, she told me. But she realized when Kikyou cursed her, and she saw what happened to you, how you were basically a slave to her whims… She understood that you weren't the one that killed her all those years ago."

...Well, he hadn't known  _that_. He'd always assumed that Kaede just didn't care anymore after being cursed by her own sister. He always assumed that she still harbored a hatred for him, deep down inside, just like all humans did. Still, did it matter? There was no changing anything. He couldn't go back in time and save Kikyou from being brutally murdered, just like he couldn't go back in time and save his mother from the same fate.

He huffed his aggravation. It was just another reason for him to keep his distance from Kagome as best he could while collecting the shards. If she got close to him,  _really_  close to him like his mom or Kikyou had, she would ultimately end up the same, wouldn't she?

Isn't that how they all ended up?

Dead?

"Hey," she said, surprising him by reaching up to touch his chin. She pulled gently, drawing his gaze down towards her. "You didn't believe me before, but believe me now: I don't think you're bad or evil because of the youkai part of you. I'm not afraid of you."

Her touch sent shivers down his back. It was impossibly light against his skin as she traced the line of his jaw and tucked a strand of hair behind his shoulder that had fallen forward.

"Kagome-" he started, needing to warn her about how she touched him. About the things it did to him. If she knew… if she  _really_  knew...

"I'm  _not_ ," she insisted, misunderstanding him. "You keep saving my life over and over again. If I owe you anything, it's my trust." She smiled, though it didn't reach her eyes. "Don't get me wrong, I understand it's because I'm more useful to you alive than dead, but-"

He pushed at her hand, shifting his chin away from her touch. It was maddening, that she was correct but also very, very not correct. "Enough," he said, irritated that he couldn't let her keep talking even though he desperately wanted her to, irritated that her words made him feel shit he didn't want to fucking feel. "Sleep."

She opened her mouth as if to protest, but closed it again.

_Thank Gods._

"Fine," she finally said, turning back around and leaning against him again. He rested his elbows against his knees which drew the fire rat coat higher over her head, creating a sort of cocoon around her.

It took a while. Every once in awhile he could sense she wanted to ask him something else, but he stubbornly kept his eyes on the mouth of the cave. Eventually, she dozed off.

"Idiot," he whispered down at her as she slept, "of course you're more useful alive."

Inuyasha sat and watched the sky outside of the cave. While hauling an unconscious Kagome around, the landscape had changed again, the forest ground rising higher and higher into steep cliffs. The cave he'd sussed out wasn't too high up, but it was high up enough that there was no way he wouldn't be able to hear anyone climbing up to check them out. It faced away from the center of the Wolf Territory, which meant building a fire would probably go unnoticed. Now he hoped it would be their last long resting place before they were able to haul-ass again to gather the jewel shard.

He tried not to think about the fact that Kagome had originally pointed straight to the heart of Wolf Territory, which meant, inevitably, that he would have to get into the thick of them. There would be no way around a fight. Multiple, most likely. It would be no problem without Kagome. He'd be able to move freely without having to worry about what was happening to her. But he wouldn't be able to find the shards without her, so going in alone would be meaningless.

...Could he fight with her on her back? He doubted it. Especially with how many wolves congregated at the center. They'd be overrun, and having her on his back would slow down his reaction time.

It was not a good situation. There was no easy answer, no clear path he could take. At least not one he could think of.

Kagome mumbled in her sleep, dreaming again.

His ears twitched as he heard the familiar sound of the runt scrambling up the small cliffside. Moments later his little hand reached inside to pull himself in. He was dragging four or five very dead rabbits behind him.

"I got dinner!" he exclaimed. "That trick you told me about works! I can hunt now!" He puffed out his chest and dropped the rabbits by the almost-extinguished fire. "Awww, she's asleep  _again_?" he whined when he got no reaction from Kagome.

"Oi, shut up, it took her forever to doze off," Inuyasha berated as quietly as he could. His lip curled up as Shippou approached them. "What did I tell you about getting too close, runt?" he snarled.

"Hey, not fair, Kagome said you can't eat me."

"Kagome's asleep, she can't stop me."

"Well, it's boring out there and I want to talk to Kagome and make sure she's okay."

"She's okay. Stop being annoying."

"I'm not annoying!" he stomped his foot, "And how do I know you're telling the truth?"

"If she wasn't doing okay, you'd be dead," he snarled, trying his best to get his point across without waking Kagome. "It's your fucking fault she almost died."

His eyes welled up with tears. "It's not my fault, it's not! I didn't know a Naraku youkai would show up! I didn't know she would follow after me!"

"You. Shot. Me. With. A. Fucking. Arrow."

"It was just a trick!"

"I nearly ripped my own heart out!"

"It's not my fault you're dumb!" He took another step forward, but hesitated again when he saw Inuyasha's face.

He would murder the kit if he took one more step, Kagome's reaction be damned. He was in  _his_  cave, approaching what belonged to  _him_. His youkai had resurfaced, brooding and ready to strike.

 **Mine,**  it seethed.

**Mine!**

"F-f-fine," the fox said, holding his hands up and taking another step back. "I promised to stay outside until night time anyway, I'll keep my promise!" he stuck his tongue out at Inuyasha.

"See that you do," he growled as the kit crawled back out of the cave.

"I'll do another sweep for wolves, just make sure you tell Kagome how brave I am when she wakes up!" he called over the lip as he scurried off again.

Inuyasha kept close tabs on the runt until satisfied that he was far enough away and occupied. He glanced down at Kagome. She was dead asleep, her lips parted, her breath whiffing against his shirt. It was fucking annoying that he couldn't just deal with the runt as he saw fit and he had the sinking suspicion that she was not going to allow them to leave him behind. It was already a rough journey, he didn't want her to be distracted, because distracted meant dead. She already almost died once saving the little shit. It wasn't going to happen again.

It was a few hours until he was relaxed enough to doze off himself. Sleep had been sparse for him over the past week, dealing with the runt and trying to keep Kagome alive. Now that she was out of the woods and seemed to be healing well, he needed all the sleep he could get.

A breeze whiffed in through the mouth of the cave, bringing with it the threat of winter.

Kagome moved.

It was slight, but something about it caught his attention, even in his sleep. It was a change in the way she was breathing, an irregular thump of her heartbeat. She moved again. Her thighs rubbed together.

He could smell it.

Inuyasha's eyes snapped open, immediately awake. " _Shit_ ," he hissed, opening his arms to see better what the hell she thought she was doing.

Asleep. She was still fucking asleep. "Oi, Kagome, wake up." He gave her a little shake.

Her half moan, half sigh was heavy and wet in his ears. She mumbled his name, her hand at his side moving unconsciously, tracing the muscle that ran from his hip straight to his-

"Oi,  _Wake up!_ " he growled, grabbing at her hand before she could touch it.

Her arousal filled his nose, her eyes slowly blinking open, hooded with sleep. She moved against him, her breathing short and uneven as the hand he wasn't holding moved - Consciously? Unconsciously? - up underneath his shirt and traced slow, lazy, searing hot patterns on his abdomen.

His youkai reared up from its own slumber, pressing against the wall that held it at bay.

**Mine.**

"Hey," he panted half-heartedly, wrestling to control his youkai. His voice came out heavy and ragged, just like his brain felt. Was she crazy? What the fuck was she dreaming about? He should move away. He should.

**Mark her.**

"Stop," he whimpered, not sure if he was talking to his youkai or Kagome.

 _Don't fucking stop!_ he pleaded on the inside, betraying everything he was fighting against.

Her fingers felt amazing.

He didn't want to, he shouldn't, but he closed his eyes and loosened his grip on her hand. It slipped through his fingers. She murmured something he didn't catch because he was so fucking distracted, but he felt her push his shirt up his torso, slow and lazy. She turned her head, her nose and lips running lightly across his chest before planting feverish kisses on his skin, his name falling from her lips between each one. He kept his eyes closed, gritting his teeth against his youkai. She dropped his shirt and wrapped her arms around him, placed a wet, heated kiss at the base of his throat.

"Ah! Fuck!" he growled, eyes snapping open again as she moved those impossibly soft lips up towards his chin, her hands moving into his hair, pulling him down towards her.

His eyes met hers. They were heavy and dark, glazed with her sleep. Did she know what she was doing or was she still half submerged in her dream?

"You saved me, she whispered inches away from his own lips, voice quivering and throaty, "you always save me. Even in my dreams…"

"You're still dreaming," he growled, desperate to close the impossibly small distance between them.

"Then kiss me," she insisted.

She didn't wait for him to decide. Her lips were on his. Tentatively. Cautiously. Just as fragile as they had been before.

The heat in his lower abdomen ached, pooling together and urging him on along with his youkai.

He should pull away.

...He needed to pull away.

But  _fuck_  she tasted amazing, her lips calling to him, drawing him in. They became hungry, and with a deep, guttural growl, he pulled her around to him, her legs straddling his hips. He could feel her heat through the flimsy pajama fabric; he could fucking smell it as it gathered there, drooling for the one thing he really,  _really_  wanted to give her.

" _Inuyasha_ ," she breathed as he kissed her, as his fingers drifted down her belly, his palms trailing the swell of her hips. "Touch me," she pleaded, the words soft. Needy.

He obeyed, growling out her name, licking and nipping at her bottom lip.

This was bad. This was really fucking bad. But fuck, he wanted her, and it was so, so easy to give in as she urged him on along with his youkai.

His fingers dipped below the elastic of her pajama bottoms, his claw ripping the bandage at her hip.

The last time he'd felt her like this… the last time he'd been able to touch her in this way had been back at the slayer's house, on the roof, with the early morning light quickly rising to trap him. It was so fucking long ago, he would go insane if he couldn't taste her now. His youkai would drive him mad.

She pressed all her weight down on him, pressed her hot, wet middle onto the bulge straining from his jeans.

He hissed, 'Fuck,  _ah_ , Kagome," and moved with her, forgetting his hands for a moment as the friction sent jolt after jolt of euphoria straight to his center.

"Please, I need you," she begged. Eyes dark and hooded, she brought her hand up to cup his cheek before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him closer, her bound breasts pressing up against him. "I need you to touch me," she said between hot, searing kisses, kisses that made it hard to fucking think. "If you don't," she whimpered, and he saw the water in her eyes, felt her shaking hands tangled desperately in his hair, "I'll  _die_." She kissed him again.

It was like ice water splashing in his face. A hard slap square against his jaw. Slowly he pulled back, his bottom lip the last to touch her skin.

**What are you doing, fool? Take her. Take her!**

Agonizingly slow, he untangled himself from her. First his arms, then his legs, gently pushing her to the side so he could get some space between them. He shook, almost uncontrollably with still-unleashed need and sat back, folding his legs and pressing his palms into his eyes. "Fuck, Kagome…" he drawled, long and heavy and aggravated. "Fuck," he lifted his head to look at her, "we can't."

She was on her knees, her eyes wide but still wet with unleashed tears, skin flushed red with her own desire. Desire that he could still fucking smell. Desire that still drove him crazy. What was he thinking, taking advantage of her in this situation? She almost died. Everything she felt right now was magnified. It wasn't fucking real.

Not to mention they had already decided they weren't going to fucking do this, and all it took was a little push from her to make him fucking crack open and give in.

God _dammit_.

"But why?" she asked, voice quivering. "I'm not-"

"Why?" he growled. He didn't want to sound angry. He didn't want to scare her, but  _fuck_ , it was impossible for him to feel anything other than longing or anger, and right now acting on his longing was out of the question. " _Why_? Because we still don't know what  _this_  is. We know this isn't normal, it's not okay, it smells like a fucking trap for both of us. It's ridiculous that despite telling ourselves not to touch each other that we can't fucking stand not to."

"Inuyasha, it's not to trap you."

"I know  _you're_  not trying to trap me, but don't think for a second this sort of sick trap isn't something Kikyou would do, dammit, we've  _talked_  about this already! And that's not even taking into consideration my youkai, who is constantly demanding I take you, even if you don't want it. Understand?"

"But the way I feel… the way you make me feel right now-"

"And that's just it, isn't it?" he snapped, "the way you feel  _right now_. You almost died tonight. Twice. Your feelings are amplified - way more fucking amplified than how we normally feel -  _which isn't fucking normal_." He watched her tears spill over her lashes. It made him sick that his words were hurting her like that, but the idea of letting himself  _feel_  like he had with Kikyou again… "One of us has to enforce what we decided. It was the right choice to make."

"When you kissed me earlier, I-"

"Kagome, I'm not your human boyfriend, okay?" He watched her eyes widen in shock.

Her hand came up to cover her mouth.

"I'm not human," he continued, "I'm  _hanyou_. I'm youkai. I can never be your human-fucking-boyfriend. Even if-" his chest squeezed painfully on the inside and he fought not to let it show on his face, "even if what we're feeling isn't some sick trap that gets us killed, even if we were able to have some sort of relationship, I'm not normal. I'm a fucking youkai trapped in a fucking mirror. I have to use the jewel to free myself from Kikyou, and do you know what that means? It means turning full youkai. It's the only way I'll be strong enough to actually be rid of her. It's the only way I can be free."

"But-"

"You don't want a fucking youkai as a boyfriend, Kagome. When this is over, you're going back to your family and your going back to school and you'll go on your field trips with your friends and you'll date some kid in your class - but not Hojou, you can't fucking date that bastard - and you'll live a normal human life, and I'll be able to live my life the way I want to, on my terms."

Her whole body quivered with unleashed emotion. She drew her brows together, her jaw locking in determination. She leaned towards him, reaching her hand out to him. "I don't care what you turn into, Inuyasha, I lo-"

He lunged forward and pressed his hand against her mouth, cutting off her words.

"Don't. Say it," he growled. "Don't fucking say it, because you don't know what the fuck you're talking about." He lifted his fingers slightly and she took in a breath to speak again. He pressed back onto her mouth. "Let me be very clear, Kagome," he said, his chest squeezing, squeezing, squeezing, so tight his heart would pop. "I  _don't_  want your feelings. I  _don't_  want to feel this way. I cannot say it any clearer. Do not make this journey harder than it has to be,  _do you understand_?"

 _Don't look at me like that,_  he pleaded inside, her eyes expressing all the torment he knew she was feeling. Slowly he pulled his hand away, and this time her mouth stayed shut. His arm dropped to the side, and he stood up. Took a few steps back. "I'll stay out here for tonight so you can get some rest -  _don't worry_ ," he added as her mouth opened to reply, "I'll be back inside before the sun rises."

With that, he turned and moved towards the mouth of the cave. But… He paused, turned his head slightly so she was sure to hear him.

"Don't leave the cave," he growled his warning to her, "you're injured. I'll be close by if anything happens, but don't fucking make me come looking for you. You're safe in here."

He jumped down the small cliff and landed on the sloping forest floor before leaping up into the branches. He had to escape, had to get away before she spoke. He couldn't let her words sway him, because for whatever fucking reason it was too easy. He had to get far enough away that he couldn't smell her. Her scent was intoxicating. He couldn't think clearly, and he couldn't act the way he knew he needed to when he was around her and she smelled like  _that_.

Had she really been about to say it? Had she been willing to utter such permanent, damaging, terrifying words?

What the hell was she thinking? He was the  _last_  person that she should… that she should feel  _anything_  for, lust aside.

He had to get rid of the urge pumping through him, he had to release himself because otherwise he would head straight back to the cave and push her against the wall and-

 _Fuck!_  he screamed on the inside, finally finding a spot far enough away from the cave so that he could no longer smell her arousal.

So he could no longer smell her tears.

 


	39. Where The Secrets Lie

 

Sango

 

“She’s with Inuyasha.”

 

The words falling from Hojou’s lips set her ablaze.  Sango inhaled sharply, her fists clenching.  There was a churning, bitter reflex that she could now say was a consistent part of her personality.

 

What she and Hojou set out to do had completely and utterly failed.

 

“Kagome must have been able to release him from the mirror,” she said, practically tasting the sour tint in her voice.  “Did he kill the witch, at least?”

 

By the look on Hojou’s face, she knew the answer was a definite  _ no _ .

 

She swallowed the urge to scream and instead cleared the resentment from her throat.  “So we went through all that effort for nothing.  Deceiving Kagome, attacking the witch, basically  _ killing _ ourselves in the process…”

 

Hojou still wouldn’t look at her.  He kept his gaze fixed steadily out the window.  She took the time to let her anger breathe, to try and calm herself, her eyes scoping out the space around her.  

 

The room was circular, built entirely out of wood, with straw tatami mats, like the ones that made up the floor of the shrine connected to Kagome’s house.  Sango’s futon was near the only dresser and was pressed up against the wall on the far right.  It seemed big and empty, like maybe it was used for meditation or prayer.  Just she and Hojou and her anger along with the futon and the wooden walls and the windows.  At least the windows were big enough that by sitting up she could see the edge of the forest through them.  They circled almost one full third of the wall space, allowing lots of light to filter in.

 

“Yeah,” Hojou finally said, having shaken himself out of his stupor, “Inuyasha got out of the mirror.  I didn’t see what happened.  Last thing I remember was tackling the monk, landing a few punches to his face.  But... I’m pretty sure Kagome let him out.”

 

There was bitterness in his voice, and anger, possibly, that almost matched her own.  She reached out a hand, intending to comfort him, but heard the door open behind her.  Quickly, she twisted around, her muscles aching.  For a moment she was sure it was the monk returning.  Her mouth opened to warn Hojou to run, but immediately snapped shut.  An old woman teetered her way into the room, holding a tray with two steaming mugs, frail hands steady despite how ancient they looked.

 

Hojou sat up from the wall, his face brightening considerably.  “Kaede!” he said, standing up to help her with the tray.

 

...So this was Kaede.  Her upper back was bent as a homage to her time spent on earth, her cotton-white hair streaked with darker gray.  It was long and braided down her back, a white tie holding the ends together.  Sango watched her shuffle towards them, sizing the old woman up.  As she kneeled, Sango noticed that her eyes were clear and crisp and cataract-free.

 

They held a kindness in them that reminded her of her grandmother.

 

“You’ve awoken, I see,” she said, her voice in tune with her age.  She smiled, and it became obvious where all those wrinkles had come from.  “I’m very glad for you, child,” she said, offering up the warm mug.

 

Sango took it from her hands and inhaled deeply.   _ Oh my gosh, it smells amazing _ …

 

“We were worried for you,” she continued, sharp eyes looking her over, “you’ve made a miraculous recovery, sitting up as you are now.”

 

She stiffened, wondering if somehow the old woman knew.  But it was impossible because she’d been dreaming up the monk.  Dreaming that he could control her movements with just his touch, dreaming that he had somehow pressed a jewel shard into her body.

 

_ Calm down girl, _ she instructed herself,  _ you’re just on edge, she’s just a sweet, old lady _ .

 

She took a sip of the tea, felt the hot liquid warming her from the inside.  It tasted just as it smelled - amazing - although it was a flavor she’d never come across in a tea before.  It was hard to explain.  Jasmine...ish?  With an almost-cinnamon-but-not-actually-cinnamon hint?  She took another sip.  Another.

 

“Feeling better?” Hojou asked.

 

To her surprise, she was, sort of.  “What kind of tea is this?” she asked.

 

“It’s my special concoction, dear,” Kaede replied, handing Hojou the other mug and smiling as he gulped it down eagerly. “It will help you relax, help you heal better.  It is a very old recipe.”

 

“It’s delicious,” she said, finishing up her mug and placing it back on the tray.  “Thank you...”

 

“Kaede, dear.”

 

“Thank you, Kaede.”

 

“No thanks needed, you have already made me very happy by sitting up.  You’ve a healthy glow about you.”  Her smile faded, just a bit. “When you and Hojou first arrived, I was sure you both were already gone.”

 

Sango’s heart sped up.  She wet her lips, nervous about the answers she would receive to all the questions in her head.

 

“About that… how exactly did we get here?  Hojou told me we’re south of Tokyo…  _ far _ south of Tokyo.  How is that possible?”

 

Hojou crossed his arms, his brows drawn together.  He was always so easy-going and positive, it was strange seeing him show anything other than that.

 

“Your friend.  She arrived first with Inuyasha.  She was a sight, very upset.  They had quite the argument and it awoke me from my sleep.   She was begging him to go back to get you, although he had convinced himself you were already gone.”

 

“She struck a deal with him,” Hojou said, “that she’d go with him willingly to collect the jewel shards if he came back for us.”

 

No way.  No way had Inuyasha been the one to pull Sango out of that hellhole attic.  No way had he been the one to save her life.

 

Kaede continued, paying no attention to Hojou’s remark, “She was very worried about the both of you, child.  She was practically comatose, sick beside herself.”

 

Sango frowned.  If Kagome was so worried about her and Hojou, why did she pull away from Hojou’s grip?  Why did she run towards Inuyasha’s mirror, when they were so close to getting out of that room without any casualties?

 

“If she hadn’t insisted on not turning him over to Kikyou… If Inuyasha had just stayed in his mirror and gone to her willingly...”

 

The old woman held up her hand, cutting Sango off cold.  “Be careful what you speak of, child,” she berated softly, “do not mistake Inuyasha as uncaring or inhuman.  When it was determined that you could be saved, it was Inuyasha who brought you here into this room.  It was Inuyasha who spent himself using debilitating magic that is not his own to heal you both.  I must admit to you that there were even times I myself gave up, thinking the task of bringing you back was impossible, but he refused to stop.  He insisted on making sure you were stable before leaving this room.”  She paused, her eyes locked on Sango, letting her words sink in.

 

Sango could feel her rage, it was like a separate person, knawing constantly at her insides.  “So what, that’s supposed to make it better?  That’s supposed to make me forgive Inuyasha for everything that’s happened to me so far?  Is it supposed to make me feel better that my brother is being controlled by a crazy priestess?  Or that she made him try to murder me?  So  _ what _ if he pulled me out of there?”  Kaede stayed silent, patiently waiting for Sango to finish, which just pissed her off more.  “There’s no doubt that this  _ shit _ that my best friend got dragged into, that she dragged  _ me _ into, is one-hundred-percent Inuyasha’s fault.”

 

Hojou regarded her with thoughtful eyes as Kaede nodded.

 

“The anger is fresh, as it should be.  Time has not passed for you in a way that has allowed you to process the events that have happened.  You and Hojou are welcome to stay and rest and heal until you are ready to act how you see fit.”  Slowly, she stood, her knees cracking, her back quivering with the effort of fighting gravity.  “Take time to think things over.  Whatever you decided, you decide.”  Slowly, she shuffled out of the room and closed the door behind her.

 

Sango immediately whipped her attention back to Hojou.

 

“Who the hell is this woman?” she snapped, “what, you just woke up and instantly  _ knew _ she was going to help you?  How does she even know Inuyasha?  How does she even fit into this ridiculous mess?”  The end of her sentence had risen to a panicked shout, her chest heaving with each breath.

 

“Sango-”

 

“You realize this is messed up, right?  Kikyou almost killing us.  Waking up to find some old, crazy lady going on and on about how Inuyasha is a  _ real fucking decent guy _ .  What were you thinking?”

 

“Hey,” he said, reaching out to rest his hand on her shoulder, “I know it’s stressful, _ I know _ .  I woke up confused too.  I thought it was a trap of some kind.  It took me a while to let it all sink in.  But the whole time I’ve been awake, Kaede has been nothing but helpful,” he gave her a shake, and she realized then that her eyes were filling with tears.  “Don’t you trust me, Sango?”

 

Her hand came up and wrap around his, squeezing his fingers like she wished she could squeeze her tears away.  “Hojou, out of everyone… since everything has happened… since you picked up the phone that night… I trust you the most.”  And it was true.  Hojou had, somehow, begun to fill the gap that Kagome was starting to fade from, a gap that had been left wide open in her absence.

 

He nodded, pulling her in for another hug.  Sango was thankful he couldn’t see her face as the tears began to leak over her lashes and slip down her cheeks.

 

“I feel the same way,” he said.  “At this point we have each other, and that means something.  While you’re healing I won’t let anything happen to you, I promise.  I have your back, okay?  We need to have each other’s back right now.  Let me worry about who to trust or not.  Let me worry about it for now.”

 

He held her as she shook.  Her sadness exploded from deep within.  Everything that had happened… everything that she still didn’t have the answers to…

 

For the first time in a very long time, she sobbed.  Big, fat, wet tears soaked her face and Hojou’s shoulder as she let it all out.  Her brother, her best friend, the naive life she had before all of this happened…  She cried for all the things that, as a silly, ridiculous seventeen year old child, she had taken for granted... and lost 

.

.

Sango worked at her legs, rubbing out the constant pins and needles.  She could actually  _ feel _ her fingers pressing at the muscles, which she knew was a good sign but she hadn’t tried standing yet.  ...If she was honest with herself, she was nervous.  The thought of actually standing and having her legs give out from under her was too much right now.

 

Hojou’s support and confidence had rejuvenated her, much to her surprise.  She hadn’t realized how much she just needed to  _ cry _ .  In fact, the last time she’d cried, save for the horrifying dreams she’d had of the monk, Kagome had-

 

She stopped herself short, slamming a mental door on the image of her friend’s face that floated around behind her eyes.

 

_ What would you even say if you saw her again…?  _ she thought.  Up until recently, she’d been sure Kagome was dead, just like she’d been sure Hojou was dead.  The anger was there still, simmering deep inside her.   _ Kagome is partially to blame for all… this. _

 

How could she even think that running off with Inuyasha was the right choice?  How could she have been tempted in the first place?  If Hojou was even half as caring as he had just been with her, it was obvious who the right choice was.  Just like they had suspected before, he had to be spelling her.

 

However…

 

_ “She was begging him to go back to get you,” _ the old woman had said.  If Inuyasha had gone through all the trouble to spell her, why wouldn’t he spell her to just fucking do what he said?  Why bother allowing her to disagree or argue with him at all?

 

...The thought was too painful, that Kagome was going with him  _ because she wanted to _ .

 

Sango inhaled, loud and heavy.  It was a lot to think about.  Too much, almost.  With Hojou keeping an eye out, she would be able to rest a bit before she had to figure everything out.  Thank god too, because-

 

The barest wisp of wind, the swishing of robes, and that tinkle of a bell she knew so well.

 

Sango’s heart stopped in her chest.

 

He stood in front of her, his staff fisted in his hand, a smile on his face.

 

“Slayer,” he said.  Those same sleepy eyes.  That calm, even voice.

 

“No,” Sango whispered.

 

“Sitting up and looking healthy, I see.”

 

Before her brain could react her body did - she lept to her feet.  But he was in front of her,  _ right _ in front of her, towering over her head.

 

“Interesting,” he said, “it is working faster than I expected.”

 

“You’re not real…” her voice trembled.

 

“Sango, I am hurt.  Who do you think gave you back the use of your legs?”

 

She turned and ran for the door.

 

Again, he was there, sifting, just like she had seen him do before as he yanked Kagome away from her room. He was in between Sango and the door and she thumped into his chest.  His arm swept around her back, holding her in place.

 

She reared her arm back, pushing all her strength into the palm she thrust towards his nose.  She was going to shove his fucking nasal bone back into his brain.

 

His hand whipped out and caught her wrist, his grip like a vice.  How was he so fast?  She struggled to pull back, twisted her arm the way she’d been taught - going against his thumb.  But she couldn’t break free.

 

“Sango, calm yourself,” he said.  His tone was soft but she knew it was a threat.

 

“Fuck you, let me go!”  She yanked herself back again, but he held strong.

 

“If you do not calm down and listen to me, I will have to remove the shard and force you to listen to me.”

 

“You’re  _ already _ forcing me to listen!” she shouted, trying desperately to wiggle out of his grasp.  “Hojou!” she screamed, “Kaedee!”

 

“They won’t hear you,” he said, and she felt his hand move down her back, his fingers feather-light despite his grip on her.  He stopped in the middle, halfway down her lower back, and she felt him _ under her skin _ .

 

She gasped, a whimper escaping through her lips as he gripped onto something.  It burned in the spot where his fingers had pressed straight through her yukata, where they pressed straight into her  _ body _ .  Her eyes widened, brutal fear settling into her stomach as she gaped at him.  His eyes were still calm and set in that almost-sleepy way he had about him.

 

_ I am nothing to him _ , she realized.   _ I’m just a plaything.  A toy _ .  What else had he done to her?  What else could he possibly do?

 

Because it was impossible what he was doing now.  It was _ impossible. _

 

“Please,” he whispered, “do not make me paralyze you again.  I wish to speak with you as you are now, not as the hapless woman you were on the floor.  I need that fire you have in your belly.”

 

“It’s not possible, what you’re doing,” she said, horrified, because she couldn’t get past it - couldn’t get past how, as he gently tugged on the shard, a tingling sensation began to creep slowly down her legs.

 

“I can see in your eyes that you hate me,” he said.  “Good.  That hate will turn to a drive that will get you what you want.  You will see me dead by the end of this.  That is my promise to you, Slayer.  Your vengeance.  My life.”

 

He released the shard, and Sango could feel his fingertips emerging from her back, could feel the tingling fade from her upper legs.

 

She was soaking wet, sweat pouring from her hairline.  She was trembling.  Fear.  It was fear that had settled inside of her.  She didn’t want to be paralyzed again.  She would rather face death.

 

Slowly he released her, and she stepped back.  Again.  Put distance in between herself and the man that had almost taken her legs out from under her.

 

“You cannot tell the others of our visits,” he said, leaning over and picking up his staff.  “Not only will they place suspicion on you, but they will seek to remove the shard from your back.  You felt it just now when I touched it - you will lose the use of your legs if it is removed.  It is possible that you may regain full use of your legs eventually, but there is no saying how long that could take.”

 

He stepped closer.  His eyes bore into her.  “So heed my warning as you set out to go after Inuyasha and the doppelganger: if you want your vengeance, you cannot tell the others of our encounters.”

 

He lifted his hand in the air, the one that he had pressed into her back.  “It has been a very long time since I’ve been able to touch a female without taking their life,” he said, as if he were just having light conversation.  His mouth curved into a smile.  “Your skin is quite soft, Slayer.  You are a woman indeed.”

 

The urge to slap him rocketed through her.  But he was gone before the thought finished, whiffed away by nothing, and her path to the door was clear.

 

She took the few steps and gripped onto the doorknob, yanking it open, half-expecting to be in some sort of sick lair.

 

Hojou jumped back, slamming against the far wall, the bowl of soup he was carrying splattering onto the wooden floor with a loud clatter.  “Sango,” he yelped, “you scared me!”  A second later his jaw dropped.  “You’re walking!”

 

“Sorry,” she replied, her mind numb. She felt wooden and hollow inside.  “Yeah, my legs feel alright.  Hojou, did you hear me just now?  Speaking to someone?”  He gave her  _ that _ look, the one he’d been shooting her way every time she mentioned something about the monk visiting her.

 

“It’s okay,” he sighed, pushing himself off the wall and bending down to pick up the bowl.  She leaned down to help him scoop the noodles off the floor.  He shot a glance up at her through his bangs.  “You’re seeing him still?”

 

She clenched her jaw.  To tell the truth and try to convince him to believe her or not?  The monk’s words rang in her ears, his warning about what would happen.  As much as she hated it, he was right.  She trusted Hojou, she knew he was her best hope of finding Kagome and the youkai, at helping her to get her brother back from Kikyou’s clutches, but for this…

 

For her freedom of movement...

 

She was terrified of losing her legs again.  She could trust that the monk would take the shard if she spoke of him.

 

Fury inflamed her insides, the details of her plan already taking place.

 

“No,” she lied, hating herself, lowering her lashes so he wouldn’t see the deceit she knew were evident in her eyes.  “I know he’s not real.  At least, not  _ here _ .”

 

Hojou nodded, satisfied.

 

She would keep the shard in her back for now.  She would keep quiet that the monk was still visiting her until she unraveled what his actual game plan was.  Once she figured him out, and figure out a way to ensure she’d still be able to walk, she would tell Hojou everything, and he would help her kill him.  And once the monk was gone, she’d be able to take Kikyou out on her own.

 

...If the monk died, would she always be able to keep the shard inside her?  After all, if it could heal her legs this quickly, what else could it heal for her?  How strong, how invincible could it make her?

 

For now, in order to get what she wanted, she would have to gain the trust of the monk, and in order for it to work, in order for her to be sure that no one else spoiled her plan, she would have to be the only one in on it.

 

Hojou whistled a small tune as he finished gathering up the spill and stood to take it back to the kitchen, completely oblivious to Sango’s intentions.

 


	40. Standstill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, thank you for continuing to come back and read YITM, I really appreciate it! I may not be able to post next Sunday, but will be returning for sure the Sunday after that. I hope in the meantime you all enjoy Chapter 40!

 

Sango

 

A breeze cut through the forest opening, crisp and cool, bringing with it fallen, amber leaves and pine needles.  It swept through the grass and wildflowers, losing speed before reaching Sango’s long black hair.

 

Sango felt it sweep through her bangs, a chill against her skin.  Fall was fully underway, and the season assaulted her senses in a way it never did back home.  She’d never been so far out into the woods in autumn.  She was usually in school, getting ready for the short winter break, making hot cocoa and enjoying evening fires with her family in their livingroom.

 

She cracked the front door of Kaede’s house open just a bit wider.  The porch was long, it wrapped around the corner and off to the side.  Kaede sat a few feet to her left, in an old rocking chair.  It creaked every time she moved forward and groaned every time she moved back.  Her eyes were trained on the open field that sprawled out from the porch as her fingers moved almost impossibly quick, weaving thin, moldable sticks into a basket.

 

Sango watched her from the door.  She was hesitant to approach her due to the way she’d lashed out at the old woman.  Sango knew her anger ran deep, but she also knew that it wasn’t Kaede’s fault.  No matter what she said about Inuyasha, she had taken Sango into her home.  She had healed her, pulled her back from the edge of death.  She had fed and bathed and clothed her.  And now that Sango was given a bit of time to pull herself together, she wanted to thank her again - this time without the attitude.

 

By this point, Sango had been up against youkai and evil witches - so why was a simple human so hard for her to approach?

 

“Come, child.  You’ll let all the cold air in,” Kaede said without any glance her way.

 

Sango’s back stiffened in surprise.  Kaede was sharp for her age.  “Sorry.” Sango stepped out onto the porch and closed the door behind her.

 

“No apology necessary.  I was going to give you all the time you required to watch me, but even this old woman can lose patience.”  She turned to catch Sango’s eye as she approached.  Clear and black and warm.

 

With all the inhuman creatures Sango was running into, it was hard not to think of Kaede as inhuman herself.  She had to tread lightly - not everyone she met was going to be something supernatural.  It was harder to stay grounded, to remember, but what other ties to her own rapidly-diminishing-humanity did she have left?  Not many.

 

Kaede patted a short stool to her left, a signal for Sango to sit.  Then her hands returned to her weaving.

 

“I didn’t want to bother you.  You looked peaceful.”  Sango’s words awarded her a smile from Kaede.

 

“After all this time here on earth, I can be nothing but peaceful.”

 

_ She’s got to be in her eighties, at least _ , Sango thought, making herself as comfortable as possible on the stool.  It was a long time for someone to live, but with her sharp eyes and even sharper mind, Kaede would surely be one of those women to live into their early one-hundreds.

 

“You look troubled, dear.”

 

Sango frowned.  Did she?  She tried her best to keep her conflicted mind from reflecting on her face, but maybe at this point it was impossible.  “I’m not troubled,” she lied.  It was becoming easier to.  “I just don’t know where to start.”

 

“You wanted to speak with me, I take it.”

 

“I wanted to… apologize,” she finally admitted, her gaze cemented to Kaede’s quick hands.  “You didn’t have to take me and Hojou in when we were brought to you, practically dead.  We caused a lot of trouble for you.  I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you when I woke up.  I was - I  _ am _ \- angry, and I took some of that anger out on you.”

 

Kaede’s hands stopped moving, her eyes soft and gentile.

 

_ Who is this woman? _  Sango wondered.   _ There’s something… exceptional about her… _

 

For a few moments Kaede didn’t speak, her hands resting in her lap, her eyes taking Sango in, reading her, possibly.  Then, finally, “I never had any children of my own, you know,” she said.

 

Sango stayed silent.  It felt like every word Kaede spoke was special, like she should listen especially carefully to her words.

 

“I grew up in a time where once past a certain age, marriage was no longer a viable option.  Even older widowers would not take me as a wife.  I was fine with it, mind you.  My love for my sister was what I considered to be important.  Our parents died very young, and although my sister was the elder of us two, I was more of one to take care of house and home.  I promised them to look after her.”  Kaede began her rocking again. 

 

“You must understand that my sister was special.  She received very specific training, and she was to remain pure due to that training.  Still, despite the effort of looking after my sister, she never quite looked at me as family.”  Her smile turned at the corners, bringing with it the wrinkles that carved deep into her skin.  “Once I became of age, she had decided to travel across the land to continue her studies.  I was not permitted to join her.  At twenty-five I was left to my own, and to the men of my village, I was decrepit and useless for my time.  But I was proficient in healing, in medicinal herbs and in the ways of a priestess.  So I had some worth to my village.  I had worth in my old age, despite never having children of my own.”

 

Her smile slowly faded, her eyes far away.  “I very much failed my sister the day I allowed her to walk away from our home.  I was a busy woman, taking care of a village to fill the void a lack of family left.  I was not there for her the way I should have been.  And she died because of it.”

 

Sango’s chest tightened.  The similarity between Kaede and her sister and Sango and her brother hit too close to home.  Although there had to be a way for Sango to get Kohaku back, it was terrifying to think that her brother could easily end up the same - lost and possibly dead.  Her eyes, now worried and sick for her brother, darted to her feet.

 

“I tell you this not because I want you to feel sadness for my life.  I have lived long.  Too long.  But I would like to impress upon you that every lost soul that comes to seek me out, every child that is in need of healing or comfort, they are all my family.  Every one of them.”  She reached out her hand, lifting Sango’s chin in an effort to catch her eyes again, “Kagome was one such child.  Hojou was one such child.  And you.  You are my child, too.”

 

“That is very kind of you,” Sango said.

 

“I am making amends.  What I could not do for my sister, I hope to do to all those who cross my path.  I cannot do much else, what with how decrepit this body has become.”  She lifted her hand, turning it so the mid-afternoon light pierced through the leathery, paper-thin skin.

 

“You must have made up for any mistakes you’ve made in the past by now.  Just by saving my life, you’ve made up for everything haven't you?”

 

“I am afraid it is not so simple.”

 

“Your sister’s death and my life.  It seems simple to me.”

 

“You misunderstand me, child.  My sister still roams this earth.”

 

Sango cocked her head to the side.  “You said you couldn’t save her.”

 

“Aye, I could not.”

 

“But then-”

 

“There are things worse than death.  At least than what we perceive as death.  My sister is dead in the way that she is no longer who she used to be.”

 

Sango frowned, trying to follow along with the old woman’s reasoning.  “So like… drugs?”  she asked.

 

That earned her a small laugh.  “If only it were so simple.  No, mind-alteration was not the cause of her disarray.  T’was magic.”

 

Magic.  Magic like Inuyasha used.  Magic like the witch used.  Was it possible?  Could it be that Kaede’s sister…

 

“Kaede… did Kikyou… did that witch get to your sister also?  Like she got to my brother?”  It made so much sense.  It was the connection that would cause Inuyasha to bring them to Kaede in the first place.  It made sense that Kaede would be willing to heal and house them with the shared hate they harbored towards her..

 

“You will not like my answer,” her voice was a whisper, yet her gaze steady and strong.  “Kikyou did not possess my sister.  Kikyou  _ is _ my sister.”

 

Sango’s world closed in around her.  The words were molasses, churning slowly in her brain.  “That’s…  _ impossible _ ,” she breathed, her hand coming up to press against her chest.  She couldn’t get enough air.  “She looks young, but Kikyou is old.  She’s  _ old _ -old.  She’s impossibly… old…” her voice trailed off as her eyes again met Kaede’s.

 

“My sister as she is now is vengeful, as I am sure you discovered so when meeting her face-to-face.  I did not escape her lust for revenge.  I am not simply an old woman.”

 

“She cursed you.”

 

“Aye.  I am cursed.”

 

“And my brother…” it had started to bubble up inside her again, the anger.

 

“My sister has not softened with her age as I have.  I was not surprised to hear that she has moved on to using humans to achieve her goal.”

 

“Why aren’t you fighting her?  Why aren’t you using your own magic to take her out?”  She could hear the tone in her voice changing, couldn't do anything to stop it.

 

“How do you think one such as I possess magic in the first place?  When my sister cursed me, she also opened up the path for me to draw magic from her powers.  The magic that my sister draws upon, the magic that she used to curse me is the very same that enabled me to save your life.”

 

It made Sango sick, the thought that Kikyou was the cause of her life, that she had anything do with her healing.  But she couldn't discount Kaede’s words.  She was right.  The very magic she hated had saved her life. 

 

“Inuyasha came to me with Kagome because he knew I would be able to help her.  He knew that I am a safe haven from my sister.  Once he decided to save your life, he knew that I would help him do so.”  She reached out a hand and wrapped it tightly around Sango’s wrist. “I will not lecture you on how I feel you must live your life, but your anger is powerful.  It is overwhelming.  It will consume you if you do not control it.  And if your brother is now your main concern, if saving him is your goal, your friends will be the ones to help you.”

 

Sango shifted as Kaede released her arm, uncomfortable on the wooden stool.  Friends.  The amount of people she could count on her hand that fit that description was slowly dwindling. 

 

“I think Hojou might be my only friend,” she admitted out loud, feeling her honestly heavy in her stomach.

 

“Is he, now?” she could hear amusement seep into the old woman's words. “Your friends are those who will not abandon you,  even in the most dire of circumstances.  True friends don't come along so often.  From what I have managed to gather from all of you, there has been much that has happened to all of you,  with little to no time to discuss how you all perceive what is happening.  Don't be so quick to discount your friends until you have a moment to breathe and discuss where each of you are coming from.  I take it you have not sat down and listen to how she feels about everything.”

 

Not really.  Not since before she and Hojou had hatched their plan of turning Inuyasha in.  And even then, with Hojou in the room, listening… Kagome hadn’t been able to truly speak her mind.

 

Kaede was right - Sango’s anger had been so strong and consistent, eating away at her, that she’d been almost blind to almost everything else.

 

But still.. the magic…

 

“Kaede, you said you draw on Kikyou’s power when you use magic.  Inuyasha’s magic must be the same, right?”

 

“Aye.  It is Kikyou’s spell that opens the path for Inuyasha to draw his magic from.”

 

“You use your magic to heal people, but are you able to use it to make people… do your bidding?”

 

She seemed to think it over, as if the idea had never occurred to her before.  “I suppose it would be possible,” she finally admitted.

 

“You keep telling me that Inuyasha isn’t my enemy, that I should trust him, but I’ve been suspicious since I first met him that he’s spelling Kagome to do what he says.  I’ve seen him do it to people before, and... she  _ changed _ after she met him.  I was there when she pulled him out of the mirror for the second time, and the way she looked at him… I’ve never seen anything like it.”

 

“Ah.  I see where your thoughts are headed.”

 

“He must be spelling her.”

 

Kaede’s hands stilled on her lap again.  “Kagome is not being spelled.”

 

“How can you be so sure?  If it’s possible…”

 

“Your friend is not under entrapment.  Not as you are speaking of it.”  She turned to Sango, wide eyes understanding and wise.  “It should be obvious to you that she is in love.”

 

Sango opened her mouth to protest, then snapped it shut.  She hadn’t wanted to think it before, because she hated the idea of it.  But as Kaede spoke it, she felt that it was true.

 

...She didn’t know which was worse.

.

.

Sango doubled-over, out of breath, her perspiration soaked into her training clothes.  She dropped to her knees, her legs shaking.  Drops of sweat fell from her bangs and splashed onto the dirt, each spot a stark reminder of how out of shape she was.

 

It hadn't been  _ that _ long since she’d last trained.  Although she knew her close brush with death would cause her some setbacks, it was still a shock how weak she felt.

 

Hojou’s feet appeared in her line of vision and she sat back on her heels, raising her chin to look up at him.

 

He was sweating too, although frustratingly not as much as she was.  He slicked his bangs back from his face, kind eyes smiling down at her.  “Not bad,” he said.

 

Sango exhaled sharply.  “You’re kidding, right?  I can barely keep up with you.”

 

“That’s to be expected, isn’t it?” he asked, his shrug nonchalant as if it were no big deal.  “You almost died.”  He reached his hand out, an attempt to help her up.  “It’s okay to be weak sometimes.”

 

“You almost died too,” she spat and slapped his offering away.  She twisted at her torso, her hands supporting her weight in the dirt as she stretched out her foot and swept his legs out from under him.

 

“Wha-!” he cried, falling butt-first onto the ground, his breath escaping from his lungs.  His eyes blinked, wide and startled.

 

Sango grinned.  “Who’s weak now?”

 

“Wrong use of words, obviously,” he muttered, but that same smile returned to his face.  “I’m actually impressed.  I thought your legs would have taken longer to heal.  Yet here you are now, sweeping me.”

 

She kept her own smile in place, kept her eyes soft although her heart thumped heavy and fast in her chest.  “Lucky, I guess,” was all she managed to say without giving herself away.

 

“I’ll say,” Hojou continued, blissfully unaware of her inner struggle.

 

_ Which is a good thing _ , she reaffirmed.

 

“It’s really great that you’re healing so fast.  It just means we can head out sooner rather than later to catch up with Kagome.  It’ll be good to see her again.”

 

Sango couldn’t help her frown this time, couldn’t help the shake of her head in disbelief.  “Hojou, are you still… I mean, what makes you so sure Kagome wants us to follow her?”

 

He glanced at her quizzically, “Why wouldn’t she?  She’s my girlfriend.  She’s your best friend.”

 

Sango bent her knees, wrapping her arms around them, her shoulders relaxing into the position.  “Aren’t you mad at her?  Even a little bit?”

 

Hojou’s eyes scanned the forest clearing, his head turning away from her for a moment before returning.  His smile was gone, his expression thoughtful.  “I can’t lie and say I’m happy about what’s happened so far, but I don’t think she is either.  None of us are.  But Sango, you’ve just discovered the existence of youkai.  Kagome too.  That wasn’t the case for me.  I was far more…  _ prepared _ when you called me.  I’ve known about the existence of youkai since I could learn to read.”

 

“You’ve never told me about how you fit into this whole slayer thing.”

 

His grin returned, flashed across his face for only a moment.  “It’s not like we had much time to chat about it,” he said, “but yeah, I understand how youkai work.  I’ve been battling them since…” he paused, thinking back, “middle school.  Granted, most of them don’t have access to magic.   _ That _ was a new one for me.  But I understand how youkai can come across to humans who aren’t trained to figure out how they’re being played.  Humans tend to be tricked fairly easily by them.  It doesn’t help that they can be incredibly beautiful creatures.”

 

“That’s pretty open of you, to describe Inuyasha as beautiful.”

 

He shrugged again, “Isn’t he?  It’s just the way they are sometimes.  Kagome’s human.  She’s reacting in a way that humans do to youkai.  Getting her away from him, creating space between them, she’ll be thinking clearly again.  The hardest part is going to be convincing her to actually leave his side.  We didn’t do such a good job of that last time.”

 

“I still can’t believe you’re not angry at her.  Or at least, at the situation.”

 

Hojou sat up and began to absentmindedly pull at the grass under him. “Everything in life is complicated, isn’t it?  Our current situation isn’t any different.  Although it’s not good for her to be hanging around Inuyasha, we can’t really ignore the fact that he came back for us.  He pulled us out of that attic, bloodied and almost dead.  He spent time and energy healing us.  For a youkai, especially half of one, he’s not completely evil.  He’s got some humanness in him.”

 

It was annoying, that he seemed to be taking it all in stride.  She wished for a moment that she was more like him.

 

“We have to rethink our strategy,” he continued, “and I think that should include the jewel.”

 

Hojou wasn’t looking at her, and she took a moment to close her eyes, to still her pounding heart.   _ He doesn’t know about the shard in your back _ , she reassured herself,  _ don’t give yourself away. _

 

“Why do you say that?” she asked, her voice steady.

 

“Well, what do we know about it?  From what Kagome told us, we know Kikyou wants to use it to continue wiping out youkai.  It wouldn’t be such a bad thing, really, if Kikyou herself wasn’t psychotic.  We know that Inuyasha wants it to turn full youkai.  Obviously we can’t let  _ that _ happen.”

 

“Obviously,” Sango confirmed.

 

“This jewel is powerful.  If anything, it might actually be of good use to us,” he frowned, “if we could figure out how to use it, that is.”

 

She could hardly believe her ears, her mind reeling as Hojou stood and swiped at the dirt on his pants.  Could she be so lucky that Hojou was thinking the same as her about the jewel?  If he were, it would make it so much easier to keep the shard in her back a secret.  Hell, maybe once she came clean about the shard in her back he would let her hold onto the whole jewel for safe-keeping.

 

She couldn’t trust anyone else with it.  No one would keep it safe like she could.  Not the damn monk.  Not even Hojou.

 

This time when he reached his hand out to help her up she accepted, letting him hold the brunt of her weight as she pushed up to her feet.  He placed a hand on her shoulder, and she lifted her chin to look at him, the forest edge a pretty backdrop that framed his face.

 

“Let’s just focus on healing all the way up before we think too much about finding Kagome or the jewel,” he said.  “We’ll come to it when he have to.  For now…”

 

His words faded away from her.  Her eyes widened.  She saw it, there, between the trees.

 

A flash of purple cloth.

 

A glint of golden staff.

 

“-should grab some lunch, Kaede should be starting on it now.”

 

“Mmhm,” Sango said, distracted.  She glanced back at Hojou, putting a smile on her face. “I think I’m going to take a walk in the woods, cool off a bit.  I’ll meet you inside in a few minutes.”

 

He raised his eyebrow.  “You sure?  Do you want me to come with you?”

 

She shook her head. “No, it’s fine, I want to be alone and clear my head a bit.”

 

“Okay, but be careful.  Kaede said youkai live in the woods.  Apparently a pretty big one attacked while Kagome was here.”

 

“I will,” she said, and started off towards the forest.  She could feel Hojou’s eyes on her back, watching her as she walked away, but when she turned to look back at him from the treeline, he was just reaching the porch of Kaede’s house.

 

She slipped in between the trees, following the barest hint of a trail, an overgrown buildup of leaves and needles soft under her feet.

 

He was standing only a few feet from her, leaning up against a tree, his arms folded.  His black hair was a sharp contrast against the light, autumn colors of the woods that surrounded him.  His eyes were closed, but they opened slowly as she approached.  Brilliant violet greeted her.

 

“Slayer,” he said, just as calm and cool as always.

 

“Monk,” she replied, the corners of her lips pulling down in displeasure.  “What are you doing out here?”

 

He moved away from the tree, standing at his full height.  He was tall, just a bit more than Hojou, and unconsciously Sango’s mind kicked into training mode, playing out the ways he might attack her, noting how she would escape if he tried.

 

But he didn’t try to attack her.  His shoulders stayed relaxed, his arms limp at his side.  His gaze held steady.

 

“I no longer have your captive audience in Lady Kaede’s house anymore, and it is hard enough masking my presence from the edge of her property, never mind in the very middle of it.  Out here I do not have to watch my back so closely.”

 

Sango huffed, “You could have been seen by Hojou just now, it was pretty stupid showing yourself like that.”

 

He waved her concern away, “I do not worry about your slayer companion, he is somewhat oblivious.”

 

She couldn’t argue with that, but she was done with the pleasant conversation.  “So?  What do you want?”

 

“I was simply watching you train.  I have been curious about your progress.  The best way to understand how far you come was to watch you in a match.”

 

“Do I pass?” she sneered.

 

A smile cracked between his lips. “I should say so.”

 

“Okay, so you’ve watched me train.  Was that it?  Can I go back now?”

 

“Ah, impatient.  I should not be surprised, I could have guessed as much by our earlier conversations.  I admit that I also came to give you an update on Kikyou.”

 

“What do I care about the bitch?”

 

“It is smart to know your enemy, Slayer,” he said, that amused smile still there.  “We may have some time yet, her healing is slow.  She does not look well.”

 

Sango sighed and leaned back against a tree herself, folding her arms as the monk had earlier.  “How are you sure she’s not just going to die?”

 

“I am sure of it.”

 

She narrowed her eyes, “are you sure of it because you’re sustaining her somehow?”

 

“If I could do that, I would have the ability to free myself as well.  No, she is sustaining herself.  But it matters not, your friend did quite a number on her.”

 

“Okay?  So?”

 

He held up his hands, as if to surrender, “That is all.  Just an update.  While I believe we do have some time, it would be best not to wait too long to set out and find Inuyasha.  The sooner it is done, the sooner we can put all of this unpleasantness behind us.”

 

She shrugged, “There’s something we can agree on, at least.  I can go now?”

 

He nodded.  Sango turned on her heel and headed back towards the clearing, ready to get as far away from him as possible.

 

“Slayer,” he called out after her.

 

She froze.  Turned.

 

He had taken a few steps towards her before he stopped.  His face had changed.  Softend.  There was a look in his eyes that she couldn’t quite place.

 

“I was impressed watching your match with your friend today.  I only caught a glimpse of it before.  In the attic, when I-”

 

“Tried to murder me and my friends?” she finished for him.  Her eyes widened when he managed to look somewhat bashful.

 

“Yes,” he said.  “And for that, while you may not believe me, I am sorry.  It is not in my nature to do such evil.  I had no control over my body.”

 

She turned to face him fully, fists clenched.  “Yeah?  What about the shard you forcibly pushed through my skin?  You sorry for that, too?”

 

He smiled, but it was sad this time, his eyes finally darting away from hers in, what…?  ...Shame?

 

“Not yet,” he finally said, “but give it time.  I may soon be sorry for that as well.”

 

He sifted without warning.  One moment there, the next gone, leaving Sango alone with nothing but the trees and her thoughts.

 

His violet eyes, darting away from her own, were burned into her memory.

 


	41. Impasse

 

Kagome

 

“You ready, Shippou?!”  Kagome shouted out into the forest.

 

She was standing at the mouth of the cave, her toes peeking over the five-foot cliff-side drop, her newly-reinforced bow gripped tightly in her hands.

 

“Ready!” she heard his voice echo from far away.

 

“Now!” she called, nocking her arrow and drawing it back, her gaze on the treetops.  The corners of her lips curled up when she heard him give a whoop of excitement before hundreds of small, black birds took to the sky.  Her eyes followed them as they waved across the horizon, like silk flapping in the wind.

 

She aimed.  Fired.

 

One fell from the sky, her arrow stuck through its wing.

 

Another arrow was immediately nocked to her bow, and another bird fell, this one struck through its chest.

 

“Yes!” she cried before drawing again.  Aiming.  Shooting.

 

A third fell into the canopy.

 

She drew and aimed again, but the flock had moved too far away, now just dust specks in the sky.  Slowly she lowered her bow and let out the deep breath she’d been holding.  Well, three wasn’t  _ too _ terrible.  She was still a bit rusty.  She hadn’t been practicing as much as she should have since she and Inuyasha set off from Kaede’s house, but it looked like she hadn’t regressed too poorly with her training.

 

She bent her knees and sat down, her legs swinging absentmindedly over the cavern lip and waited.

 

Inuyasha was behind her, sleeping in the dark depth of the cave.  She stiffened her back, an attempt to stop herself from turning to look at him over her shoulder.  She’d already glanced at him a hundred times since he stepped foot back inside right before daybreak, a routine he’d gotten into over the last four days.  She didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing she kept looking at him, and even though he  _ looked _ asleep, she wasn’t so sure he was  _ actually _ asleep.

 

Every once in a while his ear would twitch her way.  On one hand, it was hard not to watch him sleeping.  She’d never been in a position to watch him, he was always awake as she drifted off to sleep and up before she’d had the chance to awaken.  Always watchful as she slept.

 

Kagome couldn’t deny that it was a big reason why she’d fallen in love with him.  She felt cared for, despite the situation they were in.  Despite the fact that they’d practically been forced together against their will.  Despite the fact that it obviously wasn’t love on his part keeping him around.

 

She huffed and folded her arms.  Inuyasha hadn’t spoken to her much in the last four days, and whatever, it was  _ fine _ .  It’s not like she’d been in the mood to chat with him either, what with the brutal rejection and all.

 

That night…  The night he’d ripped her own heart out of her chest and stomped it into smithereens on the floor of the cave…  It had taken her a long time to stop crying.  Even after he returned at dawn, slipping in quiet as a mouse and curling up, back turned to her, as far away from her as he could, the tears still slipped down her cheeks, wetting her hair as she pretended to sleep inside her sleeping bag.  Really, he had probably known that she wasn’t asleep, but she was relieved he at least played along.

 

And that’s what they’d been doing for the past four days - pretending.  Kagome was hyper-aware of his movements while he was around, and irrationally worried that he wouldn’t come back when he slipped out of the cave at nightfall, although she knew he probably wasn’t going far.

 

He still needed her, after all.

 

“Kagome!” Shippou shouted, exploding from the treeline as a speeding ball of fluff, the arrowed birds tied together with twine and slung over his shoulder.  He scrambled up the side of the cliff and lifted himself over the lip of the cave.  “Good job today, you got three!”  he held them up as if they were an Olympic gold medal.

 

Kagome smiled and raised her finger to her lips.  “Not so loud, let’s let Inuyasha sleep, okay?”

 

He rolled his eyes and dropped the birds down next to the fire - now just slow burning ember in the daylight.  “Fine, but,” he glanced over and then dropped his voice even more, “he’s not even asleep, you know.”

 

She couldn’t help but grin, glad to have him with her to distract her from everything else while she healed.  Still, she changed the subject.  “Thank you for helping with practice!” she said.  And she meant it.  The empty hole that had been carved out of her chest four days ago seemed to fill up  _ almost _ completely when Shippou was near.  He was so darn cheerful, it was hard for some of it not to rub off on her.

 

“I did good?”

 

“Of course,” she replied, opening her arms to him.

 

He took a step, then hesitated.  Kagome was careful to keep her smile on her face.  She hadn’t been able to get the full story out of him yet, but it was obvious that he hadn’t been touched in a loving way in a very long time.  Her heart ached for him.  Still, it lasted only a moment before Shippou crawled into her lap and wrapped his small arms around her torso, burying his head into her stomach.

 

The way his nose dug into her reminded her of her friend’s pomeranian nuzzling into her when she’d go over to visit.  She felt a pang of homesickness for her normal life as she squeezed Shippou back, again thankful that she had at least someone she could feel close to at this time.

 

Inuyasha huffed behind them, changing positions in his sleep - fake sleep, because she knew now that he was definitely faking.  She refused to acknowledge him, refused to give him anything more than a glance.

 

“We can have bird meat for dinner,”  Shippou said, words muffled by her shirt.

 

“Sure we can,” she replied, thoughts drifting.  Despite Inuyasha’s brutal rejection of her feelings, he was still insistent that they wait at the cave until Kagome was healed.  But it was almost a week now and the bruises had faded into colors of sky blue and lavender, and she felt only slight discomfort when she twisted the wrong way and skin stretched across muscle.  It couldn’t be too long now that he would make them leave the cave that had become their rudimentary makeshift home.

 

Shippou hopped off her lap and started moving whip-fast around her, his movements seemingly random.  She watched him pick up small pebbles of loose rock that had fallen over the centuries from the walls and ceiling of the cave and piled them beside her.  He’d been chattering to her as she’d been lost in her thoughts.  She felt a pang of guilt that she hadn’t been listening to him.  

 

...Although if she’d learned  _ anything _ about him over these past few days, it was that he liked to talk.  It tended to be about nothing and everything, and he didn’t seem to need answers or replies to any of his stringing thoughts.

 

Inuyasha had been calling him ‘runt’ most of the time, but she’s also heard him call him a ‘kit’.  She’d deducted he was a fox youkai, and couldn’t help her amusement that, well, his behaviors were a lot like a fox.

 

His red tail whipped behind him as he moved and pounced, collecting and gathering as many small pebbles that would fit into his hand before dumping them onto the growing pile.

 

Kagome smiled.  “What are you doing?” she asked.

 

“I’m collecting pebbles!” he said, his little body shivering with excitement. “Cause there’s nothing else to do and we usually just sit around and I know this game that I can teach you and we can play and then maybe when we get back to the wolves I can play better with the cubs because they always win and get to take my meat portion and sometimes they make me do their chores for them which isn’t fair but they make me do them anyway and watch and laugh at me.”

 

He took a breath.

 

“You’ll have to teach me how to play,” Kagome interjected quickly at the chance.  She turned and swung one leg up over the lip of the cave, bending at the knee and laying it to the side, the other still hanging over the edge.  She leaned back against the wall as Shippou enthusiastically started setting up pebbles in a particular format that only made sense to him.

 

Kagome hugged her sweater firmly around her waist.  The sun beating down on her legs felt good even though the air around them was chilly.  Her breaths weren’t quite visible yet, but they would be for sure in the coming months.

 

She frowned, wondering how they would manage when it started to snow.  They were pretty far down south, but still… Would they have to dig through the snow on the hunt for the jewel shards?  Would they have to battle more youkai in the bitter, winter cold?

 

The thought of dealing with more youkai sent a chill up her spine.  In the dead of winter it would be even worse.

 

She cursed to herself.  She had always believed she was lucky, but where had her luck been the moment she stepped into that stupid museum?

 

_ Must have used it all up _ , she thought grumpily to herself.

 

“Kagome!”

 

“Hmm?” her attention snapped back to Shippou, who had placed a hand on her knee.

 

“I was showing you how to play, were you listening?”

 

She managed an abashed smile.  “Sorry, Shippou.  I got lost in my thoughts.  I’m paying attention now though, can you show me again?”

 

“Yeah, it’s simple!” he said, although it was more of a shout.  Kagome’s eyes veered to Inuyasha’s back.  They weren’t exactly being quiet to allow him to rest, although really, he didn’t deserve quiet, the jerk.  She caught the shift of his shoulders, and his ears twitched their way.  He was listening to everything they said.

 

She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of playing into whatever he was trying to glean from their conversation, and now that she thought it through, she decided she wasn’t going to stay quiet so he could nap.  She hadn’t had a good sleep for four days.  Why should he?

 

“You have your line,” Shippou said, pointing to the groove he’d drawn into the dirt in front of her, “and I have my line,” he pointed to the perpendicular groove he’d drawn about a foot away from her own.  “These are your pebbles,” he continued, pointing to the neat row he’d lined up in front of her line, “and those are mine,” he pointed to his own.  “You have to call out which pebble of mine you’re going to flick over my line.  If you hit it you get to call another one and try again, but if you miss it’s my turn.  If you miss and hit a different pebble over my line, then I get  _ two _ turns no matter what!”  he clapped his hands eagerly together, his smile taking over his face.  “Do you get it?  Can we play?”

 

His excitement was infectious.  It reminded her of the way her brother sometimes acted when he got really into something.  For a while it had been power rangers, but he’d recently grown out of that phase.

 

She forced the thought of her brother back.  She didn’t want to think about her family right now… she didn’t want to think about anything but completing their goal and getting back to a normal life.

 

“Sure, and I’ll even let you go first,” she said.

 

“Okay!”  Shippou jumped in that fox-like way he had about him, his tail fluffed out behind him as he scampered back behind his line.

 

“Can we make it more interesting?” Kagome asked as an afterthought.

 

His eyes lit up with delight, “Yes!  How?”

 

“Every time you call out and knock one of my pebbles behind my line, you get to ask me a question, and I have to answer it, and every time I do the same you have to answer one of mine.  Does that sound fun?”

 

“Yeah!  I can ask you anything?”

 

“Sure.  I’ll even let you go first.”

 

And she did.  They played back and forth.  Kagome kept her questions light at first.  Favorite color?  Favorite food?  Best dance move?  Shippou’s questions reflected hers for the most part, although he also threw in some more creative ones, like which bug tasted the best to her?  She tried to make her answers to those questions as ridiculous as possible, which caused Shippou to roll back in a fit of contagious laughter.

 

Hours passed as they played, only breaking for lunch before getting back to their game, because what else was there to do?  The sun had begun its decline towards the horizon.  Eventually Inuyasha would stir, stalk outside and disappear into the woods, just as he had the last four nights.

 

“Okay, your turn!” Shippou announced, sitting back from his battle line.

 

“I’m surprised you're not tired of this game yet, Shippou,” she said, still trying to feel him out.

 

He shook his head, “No way, this game is really fun and you’re right, the questions make it more fun!  What are you going to ask me next?”

 

“Hmmm,” she said, pointing to one of his pebbles and flicking hers to knock it back.  She’d gotten pretty good at it over the hours, and he seemed to be taking all her questions in stride, so if she was going to make that shift, now was the perfect time.   “How long have you been staying with the wolves?”

 

His eyes rolled up thoughtfully and he slowly counted on his fingers.  “A long time,” he finally said.

 

“Four weeks?” she asked.

 

“More than that.”

 

“Six? Twelve?  Or has it been more than a year?”

 

He scrunched up his cute button nose. “Kagome, you’re only supposed to ask one question.”

 

“Oh, sorry,” she said.  She didn’t want him to catch on to what she was doing: trying to get information from him.  But she was getting carried away too quickly.  “Your turn then.”  She watched him point to one of her pebbles and successfully knock one over the line.

 

“Ha!” he shouted, triumphant.  His energy had no end, he was just as excited as every time he managed to knock one of her pebbles back.  “We’re asking more serious questions now.”  It was a statement.  Smart cookie.

 

“You can ask me anything you want, Shippou.”

 

He fidgeted in his spot, his small fingers wringing together.  “How come you and Inuyasha ignore each other now?”

 

_ Brat! _ Kagome shouted on the inside, eyes going wide and choking on the air she inhaled.  She shot another glance Inuyasha’s way and cleared her throat, trying to keep her cheeks from reddening.  “Ah,” she said, unsure of how to explain.  “Sometimes adults fight… and right now Inuyasha and I are fighting...”  It wasn’t technically the truth, because in reality she’d thrown her heart at him, and he’d taken it and tossed it to the floor and stomped in until it lay flat and ruined at his feet.  It wasn’t a fight.  It was an obliteration.

 

...But she wasn’t about to admit that to Shippou.  Especially with Inuyasha so obviously listening in.

 

Shippou squirmed more in his seat.  “Sometimes the wolves fight, but they  _ actually _ fight.  Inuyasha doesn’t talk to you at all.”

 

His innocent words stabbed right into the open hole where her heart used to be.  She laughed.  It was wooden and too loud, even to her own ears.  “It’s fine, I don’t feel like talking to him either,” she said, hoping that Inuyasha heard her loud and clear.

 

“I thought you were mates, ‘cause Inuyasha got really mad every time I tried to come near when he was healing you and he wasn’t being very nice but he was nicer than the wolves are and I knew that you would wake up soon and be really nice again because you were really nice to me before the Naraku youkai attacked,” he said.

 

So much for keeping her face from turning red, she could practically feel the heat that radiated from her skin.   _ Mates _ was such a strange word for him to use.  “What does ‘mates’ mean?” she asked, half-worried to hear his reply.

 

“You know,  _ mates _ ,” his said, scrunching up his face as if the topic grossed him out, “like kissing and making babies and stuff.”  He didn’t seem to notice the way Kagome’s face drained of color. “My mom and dad were mates and they kissed a lot and then they had me and then they kissed a lot more.  Kissing’s pretty gross, but my mom and dad really liked it and they did it a lot.  So I thought maybe Inuyasha was kissin’ you or something, but I haven’t seen you guys kiss at all, so maybe I was wrong?”

 

“So your parents were husband and wife?” she asked, ignoring his very wrong assumption about the kissing - because up until four days ago there had  _ definitely _ been some kissing - and trying to get to the bottom of this  _ mates _ stuff.

 

He looked at her quizzically.  “What’s husband and wife?”

 

“When two people love each other and they want to make a commitment to each other, they become husband and wife.”

 

He nodded.  “Yeah.  Mates.  But with kissing.”  Then he sighed, “Kagome can we talk about something else less boring?  I thought maybe he was ignoring you for other reasons.”

 

“What other reasons would he be ignoring me for?”

 

“Well cause you’re human n’ stuff.  Youkai and humans don’t get along, even hanyou don’t hang out with humans.  So no offense or anything but I was thinking that it’s weird that you two live together in caves and when I thought you were mates I thought it was  _ really _ weird.”

 

Her gut clenched.  “Most youkai don’t like humans, huh?”

 

“Yeah, humans are pretty weak and lots of youkai even eat humans cause you’re weak and all.”

 

“What about you?  Do you eat humans?”

 

His little nose scrunched up in disgust.  “No, I like mushrooms and rabbits and frogs and-”

 

“You probably don’t see a lot of humans, huh?” she interrupted.

 

“I see them from a distance but I stay away because of the poison.”

 

Oh, that’s right, he’d mentioned that humans sometimes leave out poisoned food for young animals before.  “Well, I’m really lucky that you like me then.”

 

“Yeah, I like you a lot!  Cause you stayed and tried to fight the Naraku youkai when it got me in its arm and you shot an arrow straight into it and then you told me I was brave.”

 

“You  _ are _ brave.”

 

He smiled. “I am!’

 

She wanted to press him more about this  _ mates _ stuff.  Youkai lived differently and had different customs than humans did, she’d gleaned that much with her time spent near Inuyasha, but he was pretty tight-lipped about specifics.

 

... _ Although that’s probably more to do with us constantly running around and trying not to die _ .

 

And before the ripping-Kagome’s-heart-out incident, she’d actually gotten him to speak about his life a bit.  Just a tiny bit.  Part of her wanted to know more.  But honestly, who was she kidding?  Inuyasha had made it perfectly clear that he wasn’t interested in being more than travel partners.  While he cared about her in some way, she knew it in the way his gaze heated up anytime it lingered on her, in the way his voice changed when he spoke to her sometimes... he was still driven by his need to collect the shards, gain his freedom, and become full-youkai.

 

And could she blame him?  No, she couldn’t.  It would be hypocritical to do so.  If she was in his position, she’d want to gain her freedom at all costs, too.

 

She’d caught a glimpse of Inuyasha in full-youkai mode before, back in that horrifying attic.  His full-youkai scared her a bit, if she was telling the truth.  She couldn’t imagine them sharing anything together if permanently changing himself that way is what he strived for.

 

So she had to bury it.  Bury her feelings, and her needs, and her yearning deep inside, because she  _ knew _ this was coming to an end and she  _ knew _ that she was going back home and living a normal life once this was all said and done.

 

But god, she was sick to death of burying who she was becoming.

 

“Can I ask another question?”

 

“Sure, Shippou,” she said, dropping the pebble in her hand and leaning back against the cave wall, shivering at the wind that blew in from between the trees.  She’d have to get up and re-start the fire soon, the light was rapidly fading from the sky now and the temperature was dropping.  “What do you want to talk about?”

 

He stood and took a hesitant step towards her.  Then another.  Kagome smiled and opened her arms, inviting him into her lap again.  He hopped a few steps - just like a fox - and made himself comfortable there.  He looked up into her face, tilting his head back to do so.  “I wanna ask, but-” he cast a tentative glance Inuyasha’s way.

 

“You can whisper it to me,” she suggested, leaning down so he could reach her ear.  He cupped his small hands around it.  She felt his hot breath against her skin.

 

“When you leave the wolves, will you take me with you?”

 

Out of all the things for him to whisper to her, that was not one she expected.  His words caused flashbacks of that awful night to rush through her, of little Shippou crying alone in the foliage, his words echoing in her memories:  _ “I just miss my mom.” _

 

She kept her head dipped, her voice low.  “You don’t want to stay with other youkai?”

 

He shook his head, his lip jutting out.  She opened her mouth to reply, but didn’t get the chance.

 

Inuyasha snorted.  He sat up from the cave floor and turned to glare at them.

 

“No fucking way,” he snarled.

 

Shippou froze in her lap, and Kagome unconsciously squeezed him tighter to her chest as Inuyasha rose from his spot and stalked towards the mouth of the cave.  He stepped to the edge, the last bit of light fading from the horizon, and sniffed the air.

 

Kagome kept a supportive hand at Shippou’s back.  Inuyasha wanted to be a jerk?  Fine, but she wasn’t going to play into his childish game.  She looked back down at Shippou, trying not to let him see how much she let Inuyasha bother her.

 

“It’s okay, Shippou, we don’t have to decide now.  We’ll talk it all out soon, okay?”

 

Inuyasha snorted again, “Not happening.”  His eyes swept across to land on Shippou’s wide ones. “We’re not on a fucking nature walk.  If you didn’t notice, it’s dangerous to tag along.”

 

She tried not to let it annoy her that he was actively avoiding her gaze, although up until now she’d been doing the same.

 

“Inuyasha,” she started, but his attention was back to the forest.  He leapt out into the trees before she could continue.

 

_ Goddammit _ , she cursed on the inside, letting out an aggravated sigh.   _ Why does he have to be so childish? _  She picked Shippou off her lap and set him down, standing and brushing the fine dirt of the cave floor from her jeans.

 

“He hates me,” Shippou said.

 

“He doesn’t hate you, he’s just mad at me right now.  And,” she added as an afterthought, “it  _ is _ dangerous to come with us.”

 

“I could help though,” he pouted, folding his arms, “I can trick others into seeing and believing things, like I did with the arrow.”

 

“That is very helpful,” she smiled down at him, trying not to let on just how angry she was.  “But let’s not worry about it for now, we’ll bring it up later, after we’ve collected the shards we came for.  We should get the fire up and going again for dinner tonight.  Want to help me look for firewood?”

 

He nodded eagerly and scampered over to the cliff edge, waiting for her to climb down before he followed.  “I bet I can get more than you!”

 

“I’ll take that bet!”  She said, glad to get his mind off of Inuyasha’s bitter words.  “Why don’t you go that way,” she pointed off to the left, in the opposite direction Inuyasha had gone, “and I’ll go this way.”

 

“Okay meet you back here!”  He ran off in between the trees.  Kagome watched him go before she turned and headed into the forest herself, wishing she still had her convenient glass bottle necklace to carry the shards in.  At the moment, they were still wrapped around the small ripped bit of Inuyasha’s T-shirt and stuffed inside her pocket.  She wasn’t about to pull them out and expose them.

 

It was almost impossible to see far, and she didn’t bother trying to be quiet as she trudged over the rocky terrain.  The ground sloped downwards slightly, and she kept her hands out, feeling for trees she could barely see to keep her from running into or tripping over anything.  It wouldn’t be much longer now, she knew.

 

She was right.  Only minutes after wandering around aimlessly, he dropped down in front of her.  She jerked back, her voice rushing out in a high-pitched squeak, her hand slapping to her heart.

 

His ears flattened against his head, and even though she couldn’t see it, she knew he was frowning.

 

“Where the hell are you going?” he growled, taking a step towards her.

 

She folded her arms and stood her ground, despite his silhouette towering over her.  “I’m here to tell you to back off of Shippou.  Stop being so mean to him.”

 

“I’m just being honest with him.”

 

“You don’t get to decide these things without talking to me.  You’re not the only one here.”

 

“I’m the only one keeping you alive, so what I say goes.”

 

“That’s not going to be how this works, Inuyasha,”

 

He took another step forward. “It is,” he seethed.

 

His breath brushed across her face, she could  _ feel _ how close he was.  She wanted to reach over and slap him, so she closed her fist at her side, gritting her teeth against the string of insults she desperately wanted to hurl his way.

 

“It’s not.  You can’t just stomp around and lay down the law, no matter how angry you are at me, or how much you don’t want me around you.  You can’t just-”

 

His hand slapped over her mouth.  The move was achingly familiar.  He’d done the same, when she was admitting to him how she-

 

“Shhh,” he breathed, his voice a harsh whisper, breaking through her thoughts.  His arms slipped around her waist and he took another step, pressing her to his chest.

 

Her heart pounded, so loud there was no way he couldn’t hear it.  What was he doing?  She hadn’t come out here to freaking make out with him, she’d come out here to tell him off.  But she noticed then that his breathing had changed.  His face was turned away from her.  She could see the silhouette of his ears flicking back and forth across his head.

 

_ Oh shit.  He hears something. _  She immediately stilled her breathing.

 

She heard it then.

 

A growl.  Low and deep and threatening.  Another joined.  Then another.  Whatever it was - they were - snarled.

 

Inuyasha whipped around, dropping into a crouch and snarling back. His arms splayed out to the sides, creating a wide barrier.  Kagome took a step back.

 

A dozen pair of yellow eyes, maybe more, peered out through the trees.

 


	42. I've Got You

 

Inuyasha

 

The crunching of leaves, the shuffling of dirt…  Inuyasha let out an irritated huff and rolled his eyes.  He’d recognize that pattern of footsteps anywhere.  Kagome was stumbling around in the near-darkness trying to find him.

 

He visibly relaxed, glad it wasn’t something worse coming his way.  The night felt  _ off _ somehow, and he couldn’t figure out why.  He lept up higher into the tree to get a better idea of where she was exactly.  He scanned through the branches until he caught sight of her blue sweater.  She was hugging it tightly around her, muttering under her breath.

 

The hell was she doing?  He’d told her to fucking stay in the cave, and here she was, tramping around, alerting the whole forest to her location.  Was she trying to piss him off?

 

He bit back an agitated growl as she drew closer.  He didn’t want to talk to her.  He didn’t want to be in her presence at all if he didn’t have to.  He didn’t trust himself.  But she was making it incredibly difficult as she stomped right under and past his tree, blind and bumbling, hands out in front to catch any obstacles in her way.

 

Rolling his eyes at her clumsiness, Inuyasha lept across a canopy of three or four trees before dropping to the ground, cutting off her path.  He watched as she jerked back, a curl of satisfaction blooming within him, mixing in with...  _ fuck _ ... with the arousal that he felt every time she was near.  It soaked his insides, causing his fists to clench against the urge to reach out and grab her up in his arms and finish what she’d started all those nights ago back at the cave.

 

Instead he frowned, and took what he hoped was a menacing step towards her.  “Where the hell are you going?”

 

She held her ground, the brave wench.  It both bothered and elated him that she didn’t seem to fear him anymore.  She crossed her arms and planted her feet.  Her eyes were unable to focus on him in the dark but she was managing to look in his general direction.

 

How would she react, exactly, if he reached out for her in the darkness?

 

“I’m here to tell you to back off of Shippou,” she said, her words piercing through the dirty fantasy unraveling in his head, “stop being so mean to him.”

 

Fuck, it was always going to be about the runt from now on.  He knew it would come to this eventually.  Despite the fact that the little shit had been the cause of Kagome’s wounds - and his wounds as well, dammit - she’d latched onto the twerp.  She was too kind for her own good, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to pull any punches to avoid hurting the kit’s feelings.

 

“I’m just being honest with him,” he growled.

 

“You don’t get to decide these things without talking to me.  You’re not the only one here.”

 

Yeah, he knew he wasn’t the only one here, but what the fuck did she think he was doing, having a picnic?  A little stroll through wolf territory?  She was so goddamn frustrating.  

 

**Make her obey you like a good bitch** **_,_ ** his youkai thrummed on the inside.   **Your mate must obey.**

 

_ Yeah, except she’s not my fucking mate, _ he seethed.  Still, he was the only protection she had.  Why was she making his job so goddamn hard?

 

“I’m the only one keeping you alive, so what I say goes,” he managed.

 

“That’s not going to be how this works, Inuyasha,”

 

**Make her obey** .

 

He grit his teeth.  His youkai was becoming more demanding, and he didn’t understand why.  He couldn’t think properly with his constantly raging at him behind his conscious.  He took another step towards her.

 

“It is,” he said, putting as much force behind his words as he could.

 

He was practically on top of her now, and his youkai whined with pleasure inside him.  Her head was tilted back, her feet still refusing to move and surrender.  Her eyes, still not quite focused, held an anger in them that he hadn’t seen in a long time.  It was that same anger she’d shown back at the Slayers house, after he’d wrestled the situation back under control.

 

He was so fucking close, the urge to reach out and grip her hair in his hand, to pull her head back further and taste the skin at the base of her neck, a taste he knew well, was overwhelming.  The anger in her eyes excited his youkai.  It drove his thoughts mad with her.

 

_ Why the fuck did you come out here _ ?! he wanted to scream,  _ Why the fuck don’t you stay away from me?! _

 

“It’s not.  You can’t just stomp around and lay down the law, no matter how angry you are at me.”

 

He had to give it to her: when she spoke, her voice held steady.  But her lips continued to move, and all he wanted to do was take them with his own.  To cut off her words and swallow them.  The only thing he wanted to hear falling from those lips was his name, over and over and over until-

 

…until…

 

Inuyasha’s eyes widened.

 

He was stupid.  He was so goddamn  _ stupid _ .  How had he not realized why the air around him had felt so  _ off _ ?  Because he knew now, why he’d been on edge.  He knew now, why he’d been so uneasy.

 

Crunching.  Panting.  The stench of a hundred unbathed pelts.  They were closing in, covering distance at speeds he couldn’t quite comprehend.

 

...How… how had they snuck up on him?

 

“-or how much you don’t want me around,” Kagome was saying, completely unaware of the immediate danger they were in, “You can’t just-”

 

He pressed his hand against her mouth.  “Shhh,” he breathed.  Not like being quiet would do them any good now, but he needed silence to hear their movements.  They had been tracked down, and there were so many.  Too many.

 

Inuyasha’s whole body felt tight, like a drawn bowstring.  He took one last step and drew Kagome to him.  Had her closeness affected his ability to sense them out?  Had her presence left him utterly and completely vulnerable?

 

_ Probably _ , he thought,  _ but does it fucking matter _ ?  No.  No, it didn’t matter.  What mattered was keeping her safe.  That was priority-fucking-one right now.

 

He knew by himself, he might have a chance.  He knew he’d at least be able to escape if there were too many, which there  _ were _ , dammit.  But having to keep track of Kagome as well...

 

He turned to scan the darkness as they drew near, the stench now overpowering in his sensitive nose.  They were closing in.

 

Had they found the cave?  If they had, why would they attack here?  He barely registered Kagome stiffen in his arms and the way she held her breath.  He opened his mouth to tell her what was coming for them when a primitive growl split through the air, beating him to it.

 

More joined in, yellow eyes now blinking in and out of the trees as they moved.  He could make out their bodies as they materialized from the darkness, large and lithe, covered in thick fur.  Dozens, drawing closer, creeping up on them.  A particularly large one, the leader of the pack, snarled.  A signal of what was to come.

 

**They dare to threaten us?**  his youkai seethed.   **Let me out.  Let me out so we can put them down.**

 

True, it would be easy for him to release his youkai, to let it take over…  But then what?  Kagome would be in just as much danger as she was now.  Because when it  _ did _ take over… when he let his youkai take control…

 

There  _ was _ no fucking control.

 

Quick as a whip, Inuyasha spun and dropped into a warning crouch, snarling in reply to the threat.  Fuck if he was going to let them think he was easy prey.  He splayed his arms out to the side, signaling that Kagome was off limits.

 

Another snarl was an obvious dismissal of his claim.  Yeah... he knew it wasn’t going to work.  

 

If he could distract the wolves from following her, she could seek shelter in the cave, possibly have the advantage of picking them off from higher ground one-by-one.

 

Another snarl ripped from one of the wolves, an immediate warning of attack.  Inuyasha reached out behind him and gave Kagome a shove.  “Get back to the cave!” he snapped before giving the wolves a warning snarl of his own.

 

She stumbled, but he didn’t hear her run.  She was frozen.

 

Dammit, this wasn’t the time to be scared, she needed to do what he said.  Inuyasha was a fast runner, but with the added weight of Kagome, the wolves would be all over them in no time.  He opened his mouth to scream at her to go, but heard her turn and run before the words could slip between his lips.

 

 _Keh.  Good_ , he thought.  With Kagome out of the way, nothing was holding him back.  His hands clenched into fists, and he felt the stir of his youkai within, revving him for a fight.  It had been a long fucking time since he’d been up against so many.

 

The wolves were numerous, but he didn’t sense any actual youkai in the immediate area.  It didn’t mean they weren’t actively directing the wolves to attack.  Wolves were an organized species by nature, but on this scale... in Wolf Territory…

 

Youkai were definitely calling the shots.  Hell, they might have known he was there as soon as he crossed the invisible border.

 

A familiar curl of bloodlust unfurled in his veins.  He let his youkai forward, let it slip into control just a bit - just enough to allow his more animalistic senses to take over, and readied himself for the attack.

 

But they didn’t attack.  They stood, pacing and panting, as if waiting for something.  As if waiting for an order.

 

Then movement to his right.  Inuyasha turned to cut off the wolf stalking towards him, and only by luck managed to see a wolf to his far left take off running.

 

Take off running after Kagome.

 

He roared, and his foot dug into the soil, immediately changing direction and leaping for the wolf.  He slammed into its side, his claws digging deep into fur and flesh, tumbling over and falling into the dirt.  Without a second thought he ripped his hand through its gut and squeezed at whatever organ he could wrap his fingers around until it popped.  Blood poured down his arm and soaked the ground.

 

He choked on the foul smell as he stood, still gripping onto its insides, and threw it as hard as he could into the pack.  They scattered around the lifeless body, before closing in on it and sniffing.  A hundred snouts turned his way, lips rippling and dripping as they pulled back to show a sea of gleaming white teeth.

 

**If you touch my human I will end you,** his youkai turned vicious inside his head.

 

Two more attacked, leaping at him from opposite sides.  He reached out for both but only managed to grab the one coming at his left by its legs.  The other was at his neck, trying to rip his skin open and tear at the muscle and tendons underneath.  He weaved his head and thrust his other forearm into the wolf’s mouth, teeth grit against the fangs tearing into him.  He snapped the leg in his left hand, and pinned its body under his foot, placing all his weight on it as it struggled.  With that arm free, he shoved his fingers into the other wolfs’ eyes, felt them stick around his fingers like berries, felt them burst and ooze over his skin.  It was just enough to loosen its jaw, and he pulled his fingers from its eyes and grabbed its snout, feeling bone crunch as he squeezed and ripped it off his arm, throwing it, too, into the pack.

 

He took a step forward, but the wolf with the broken leg clamped onto his calf, distracting him for just one second.  Enough time for a dozen of them to strike, piling on top of him until the woods around him became nothing but twisting, tangled bodies, all biting and tearing and clawing.

 

Red seeped into his vision as he fought his way out.  And through all the blood and the haze and the mass of wolf fur,  _ her _ scent assaulted him.

 

_ No. _  What the  _ fuck _ was she doing, coming back here?  What the fuck was she thinking?

 

His vision soaked red as he clawed, an animalistic scream tearing from his throat as he grappled and thrust his arms through the onslaught.

 

He had to get to her.

 

He had to get to her first.

 

Shrieking again, he tore through the withering bodies, broke free and ran.

 

Wolves bounded ahead of him, faster than he could possibly run, and yet-  _ and yet _ \- he pushed himself faster.  Faster.   _ Faster! _

 

He could see her now, stumbling through the trees in front of him, blind as a fucking bat with her bow in her hands.

 

Fucking hell, was she trying to get herself killed?

 

He said nothing as he ducked low, running straight towards her.  He slammed his shoulder into her stomach, hoping the bend of his knees and the upwards motion he used as he swung her belly over his shoulder would make the impact less painful.

 

Still, the breath whooshed from her as he connected.

 

“Oof!” she cried, before struggling against him.  She screamed and kicked for only a moment, but must of realized who he was, because her body went slack against him as he ran, making it easier for him.

 

“I told you to stay at the cave!” he shouted over his shoulder, dodging trees and roots.

 

“You thought I’d just leave you there?” she shouted back, her voice still tinged with anger.

 

No, goddammit, she was too fucking nice and eager to help for her own damn good.  But he didn’t have time to say it.  The wolves were catching up, hot on his heels.  He felt Kagome move behind him, felt her upper body lift away from his back, like she was trying to get a good look at the wolves behind them.

 

He opened his mouth to tell her to stay still when he heard the distinctive whistle of an arrow pierce the air, heard it hit its mark.  Kagome let out an elated cry behind him.

 

Again she moved.  Again he heard her arrow hit its mark.

 

God _ dammit _ she was fucking cool.

 

But it wasn’t enough, even as she shot another arrow.  Even as another wolf fell to the ground.

 

They were gaining distance, and he couldn’t fucking run forever.  He was a sprinter, not built for distance.  There was only one option he had.

 

“Hang on!” he said, pulling her from his shoulder and pressing her against his chest.

 

“What are you doing?” she called over the wind.

 

“We have to sift!”

 

“No, wait!” she cried, “what about Ship-”

 

The air moved around them, taking them both.

 

“-pou!” the word rushed from her mouth as they reappeared.

 

“Forget about him,” he said, trying to take stock of his surroundings.

 

“We can’t just leave him, Inuyasha, we have to-”

 

“He can take care of himself,” he snapped.  They were definitely still in Wolf Territory, but he didn’t recognize the landscape, couldn’t tell where they were exactly.  He’d sifted them higher, towards the center of Wolf Territory.  Here the cliffs rose around them.  The trees were sparse, giving them less coverage, even in the dark. “Do you sense the shard?”  He asked, trying to quell the panic that rose up inside him.  They weren’t safe here, there were so many wolves.  Too many.

 

“But-”

 

“Do you sense the shard?”

 

She huffed but closed her eyes for a few moments before pointing towards a mountainous cliff to their right.

 

“Fine, we’ll head over-”

 

They slammed into his back.  Kagome flew from his arms as he smashed chest-first into the rocks littered at his feet.  The bodies ripped and tore and snarled.  He held one off by the chest and another by throat as it snapped at his face, drool frothing at its mouth.  Where the fuck was Kagome?  He could hear her screaming, words he couldn’t focus on as he fought to keep the animals off him.  He rolled back and managed to get his feet under one, kicking him off just as another took its place.

 

An arrow struck it between its eyes, and it fell limp on top of him.

 

_ ….thhhhhhokk! _

 

_ ….thhhhhhokk! _

 

Each arrow hit its mark, one after another.  Kagome couldn’t possibly get them all.  There weren’t enough arrows.  But for Inuyasha, it was enough to get the upper hand.  He rolled and tore through the rest, leaping to his feet and running for her again.  He looked over his shoulder.

 

It was a blanket of pelts as far as he could see, pouring around the corner of a cliff.  Here he could sense the youkai.  He looked up and caught shadowy figures against the clear, starry sky.  Just as he had thought, they were organized, and they were out for his blood.

 

“Again!” he yelled, forced to ignore their presence as he yanked back the wolves who had Kagome surrounded.  His only option was to continue to sift closer and closer to the shards she sensed until they were right on top of him.  And he had to do it before he ran out of juice.

 

He scooped her up and sifted.

 

When the sift ended, there was nothing but more wolves.  More than before, which was fucking impossible.  Kagome was ripped from him, he couldn’t tell from where.  What the hell was happening?  How could there be so many ready to strike?  Even with an organized attempt they would have needed weeks to call in reinforcements.  It didn’t make sense.

 

Inuyasha’s surroundings blurred, the snarls and howls and rippling growls blending together with the blood pumping in his ears.

 

And then her blood.

 

_ Her blood. _

 

“Kagome!” he yelled, fighting through the mass.  She was off to his right, and he let out a roar, desperate to get to her.

 

**Release me** **_._ **

 

Inuyasha’s eyes honed in on her, surrounded and bleeding from a bite wound.  Which one had bitten her?  The wolf wouldn’t know the meaning of pain until he was through with it.

 

A strike came from nowhere.  It wasn’t the sinking of wolf teeth, but a fist, strong and solid against his jaw.  It drove him to his hands and knees, and as he turned to look at his attacker, it struck again.  Then again.  He heard Kagome scream, heard her call his name.  This time when the strike came, he was ready.

 

He reached out and gripped onto an arm, sinewy and muscular, and he reared back and struck.

 

“Weak,” said the wolf youkai, unhindered by Inuyasha’s attempt.  His glowing yellow eyes were piercing and wild, his burnt umber hair shaggy and long around his head.  “I’ve been told you were something to fear my whole life.  And yet here you are.  About to die by my hands.”

 

Inuyasha felt his breath fall short and ragged, felt blood pool from his wounds.  He pulled his arm back to strike again, but the youkai reached up and gripped his wrist, twisting it behind his back until he felt it snap in two.

 

Pain manifested in the roar that rushed from in between Inuyasha’s lips.  The youkai struck him again, and he flew back into the cliff wall, the pressure splintering the rocky surface.  More pain blistered across the back of his head.

 

Again, Kagome screamed.  A second wolf youkai, this one skinnier and paler than the other, black hair greasy and chopped short, gripped his hand around her neck.  He knocked her bow from her hand and lifted her up off the ground and swung her over the edge of the cliff.

 

Another scream as she kicked out at him, her fingers clawing at his forearms, her knuckles turning white.  Her eyes darted to Inuyasha, wide and scared.  Her lips moved to call his name as the youkai let go of her neck.  She seemed to float for a second.

 

Kagome had sat next to him, back at the first cave, laughing and picking dirt from her hair, cheeks flushed and eyes bright.  Her fingertips had brushed against his arm as dusk settled around her.  Her heart had beat alive and whole and healthy in her chest.

 

It had been quiet, despite her words.

 

It had been peaceful, despite the night birds chirping.

 

_ Kagome… _

 

Inuyasha thrust himself off the rock wall, lept for her, his good arm reaching out as the last bit of her disappeared from his sight, and his fist closed on nothing.

 

_ No. _

 

His toes curled around the cliff’s edge, and he kicked with as much force as he could.

 

She was falling ahead of him, her hair whipping around her head as the air rushed through it.  He had to catch her.  He  _ had _ to.  She was the only person with who he could be himself.  She was the only person he wanted to keep safe.

 

She  _ would not _ die because of him.

 

His fingers grabbed at her shoulder, and he pulled himself down towards her and twisted in the air so she was cocooned in his arms.  He pressed his lips to her ear.

 

“I’ve got you,” he said.

 

She replied back, but he couldn’t hear her.  Not over the howling wind, or the thrumming of his own heartbeat in his chest.  But her hands stilled as she placed them over his own, and she tucked into him tighter.

 

The edge of the cliff fell away from them.  It wouldn’t be long now.  Inuyasha might die here, his youkai silent and dormant inside him, his body broken and pushed to its limit, but at least his last act would be to save Kagome.

 

Because at this point, what was he worth without her?  He was nothing if she was not by his side, smiling at him, laughing, touching…

 

He had to tell her.  It was now or never.

 

His mouth opened to say it.

 

_ I love you. _

 

She screamed.

 

The pain overcame him, unbearable.

 

And he was gone.

 


	43. The Youkai Within

 

Inuyasha

 

**_Fool...  What did he do to my body?_ **

 

The world throbbed around him.  His arm burned.  His brain pounded an annoying beat in his head.  The female’s voice did not help.  She blubbered and screeched over him, her tears splashing onto his forehead.

 

He wanted to reach out and slap her.  To grip her chin and demand her to stop being hysterical.

 

...Yet wasn’t that exactly what females were?  Nothing but ridiculous, emotional hysterics?

 

He wanted to open his mouth to tell her to shut up.  To demand that she obey him.  But his mouth wouldn’t work.  Nothing worked.

 

**_That is what I get, leaving myself in the hands of a hanyou_ ** **,** he thought, the bitter words stewing his insides.  The only thing that made him feel better was that he knew it wouldn’t be long now.  Already, he could feel his body healing.  He could feel his snapped bone threading itself into repair.

 

Yes… It wouldn’t be long...

 

He couldn’t smell the woman that was bent over him, screaming his name.  Not yet, anyway.  But she rubbed him wrong.  She seemed…  _ familiar _ somehow.  He  _ knew _ her, he was sure of it.  Which meant…

 

_ She belonged to him _ .

 

So why then, was the bothersome wench screaming like a banshee?  If she was his,  _ which she was _ , then she should know her place.  She should know to be silent.

 

It was great fortune that in that moment his broken face healed enough that he could  _ smell her _ , and…

 

 ** _Ah, yes,_** he thought as her screaming turned to jumbled words, her voice worried and desperate. **_I know this wench._** **My** ** _wench._**

 

**_MINE._ **

 

Inuyasha opened his eyes.  They were newly healed and sharp.

 

The world was still dark around him.  What-was-his smelled delicious, leaning over him, her hands on his chest.  Her hair was black, even deeper so than the black that surrounded her, her eyes a devastatingly beautiful color, for a human.  Her pink lips moved as they formed around his name, her pupils widening as they finally met his in the night.  She knew he had changed.  He could smell the fear that bloomed inside her.  He sat up and she jerked back.  But he was quicker.  Oh yes, he was  _ much _ quicker.  What-was-his should not attempt to escape him, she should know it would be useless to try.

 

**_Incompetent hanyou, can’t even train what is mine correctly,_ ** he thought as his hand caught her upper arm, tightening his grip when she tried again to pull away.

 

“I-Inuyasha,” she said, a worried tint still evident in her voice.  She’d stopped her incessant screaming, he noted, so he would not have to correct her by way of a slap.  Still, what-was-his should know better.

 

**“Woman.  Where do you think you are going?”** he asked, his tongue heavy and thick in his mouth.

 

What-was-his widened her eyes even more, although he’d have thought it impossible.  She started to tremble, her mouth opening and closing like a fish.

 

“Y-your face…” she whispered.

 

**“What about it?”**

 

“It’s… different.”

 

**“It’s how it should be,”** he corrected, then pulled her closer to him, burying his nose in her hair and inhaling deeply.  She smelled exquisite.  Intoxicating.  It seemed the foolish hanyou had done something right, claiming this one as his.  Never had Inuyasha felt so…  _ warm _ .

 

He reached around to push her thick, tangled hair away from her neck and dipped his head low to nuzzle at the skin, ignoring her irritating cries of protest.  He needed a taste.  He deserved one, did he not?  He had obviously been protecting her, although from what, he could not remember at the moment.

 

He darted out his tongue to sample her, to taste her skin, just a hint at what he’d already…

 

**_It can’t be…_ ** he thought as she shuddered under him.  He pulled back from her, perplexed.  He could smell how she became wet for him, could tell she wanted him.  She ached for him just as he did for her.  And yet…

 

He hadn’t claimed her yet.  It was written all over her.  No wonder she didn’t know her place.  No wonder she wasn’t submissive to him as she should be.

 

However, what  _ enraged _ him was that she smelled like  _ other youkai _ .

 

What the  _ fuck _ did the hanyou think he was doing, leaving her unclaimed and in the presence of other youkai?  Inuyasha struggled to understand and came up short.  It angered him even more.

 

What use did he have with a human female if she was not claimed to him?

 

...That would change.  Now.  He would have her  _ now _ .

 

His hand moved to wrap in her hair at the base of her neck, and he pulled her to him, jerking her chin back and ignoring her cries of protest.  She was sweaty and covered in blood and dirt, her arms scratched and a deep bruise blossoming across her throat, yet still her scent was so intoxicating it did not matter.  It was almost unbearable.  He hardened for her.

 

There were other youkai in the vicinity, and they were close, although he couldn’t yet pin them down.  He would have to claim her now, to cement her as his own.  No other would have her.  He would see to that.

 

**“Mmmm,”** he growled in her ear, pleasured by the way her body writhed against him.  She was still afraid, he could smell it mixed in with her pleasure.  He batted her hands away as she pushed against him.

 

**“Stop,”** he demanded, but she did not obey.  Frustration shot through him.  Why was she denying him?  She should be welcoming of him and submit.  He growled, frustrated, because the other youkai were now closing in.  Two of them, along with the stench of wolves.  The hand that caressed his female’s hip tightened.  His ears flicked towards the sound of their approaching enemies.  He ignored her cry of pain.

 

**_What-is-mine will have to wait,_ ** he decided.  It did not make him happy that he could not claim her now, but after he spilled blood, his lust would increase.

 

And there was nothing more satisfying than a good fuck after a thrilling kill.

 

So wait he would.

 

A youkai stepped out from between the trees, and Inuyasha scrunched his nose in disgust as his stench threatened to overwhelm him.

 

**“Filthy wolves,”** he spat, pushing his female away and standing to face his enemy.  He clenched his fist.  His muscles coiled, ready to strike.

 

“Inuyasha…” the youkai said.  It was the one that had held what-was-his over the cliff by the back of her neck, he now remembered.  The memory replayed back to him now: the terror in her eyes, the knowledge that she would die ate at the hanyou’s insides - at  _ his own _ insides...

 

Inuyasha snarled in response, not just livid at the lowly youkai daring to speak his name, but also at the hanyou for allowing what was his to be put in such danger.  It was a good thing the hanyou now slept deep inside him.

 

He would not be giving control back.

 

“How is it you live?” the stinking wolf youkai continued, brows drawn together, lip curled.  “How-”

 

“He is no longer hanyou,” a second youkai said, also stepping out from between the trees.  This one was bigger than the other, and yes, Inuyasha recognized him as well.  The rust-colored bastard that twisted his arm, breaking it while he was in his weakened hanyou state.

 

Such a thing would not happen again.

 

He stood, keeping an easy track of the others that surrounded them.  He could see them through the trees, closing in.

 

Fools.

 

What-was-his whimpered from behind him, a pathetic,  _ human _ noise.  He noted it, but refused to let it distract him.

 

“He’s silent,” the first one said.  He peeled back his lip to show his fangs.

 

“Keep your focus, Goro,” the larger one warned, “you’ve heard the stories.”

 

The youkai named Goro snapped his teeth, frustrated.  “We have him cornered, Hokuto.  It’s just as Kouga said, he cannot escape this ti-”

 

Inuyasha lept.

 

He lunged across the short distance, claws outstretched, silent as the night sky, as he should be.  Every muscle in his body pulled tight, ready to maneuver at the last possible moment.

 

He did not need to.

 

He flew past the one called Hokuto, too quick for his fool eyes to follow, and plunged his claws through the black-haired youkai’s throat.  His chin slumped forward, the only sound a wet gurgle, a slush of liquid and the crunching of vertebrae and crushed esophagus between Inuyasha’s fingers.

 

“Goro!” the other shouted from over his shoulder.  Inuyasha rolled his eyes in annoyance.  So slow.  These youkai that challenged him were not of nobility line, as Inuyasha was.  They could not conquer him.

 

And since these two were so simple, where then, was the noble of the pack?  Where was their leader?  Inuyasha coiled to reach around and grab the one named Hokuto, who, to his surprise, reared back before leaping into the clearing, giving them space.

 

Inuyasha grinned.  So then, both were not as foolhardy as he thought.  This wolf chose not to roll belly up and die.  Interesting.

 

He crouched down low, fangs extended and claws digging into the dirt, waiting for the moment to leap, when the coward turned and ran.  For a moment, Inuyasha froze, again taken off guard.  The wolves that surrounded him and what-was-his stayed put, yellow eyes glaring and pacing, weaving between the trees.

 

He huffed in annoyance.  So be it, then.  It would be easy for Inuyasha to catch up, once he was done with the pack.

 

He didn’t wait for them to attack this time.  One by one, Inuyasha tore through them.  It was a game.  A pattern that he chose, striking out to efficiently kill each and every one.  A few turned and ran, just like their leader.  But it did not matter.  It was the hanyou’s endeavor, to hide himself away like a cur.  Inuyasha as he was now would do no such thing.  Let the few wolves who escaped run and tell their master.  Let them know he had come.  He would be glad for the challenge.

 

What-was-his was standing, still in the clearance.  He turned, his eyes falling upon her.

 

Her hands were out in front of her as she slowly turned in a circle, searching for something.  For him?  Or for something else?

 

He shook off the body still impaled on his claws and crept back into the clearing.  What-was-his now had her back to him.  He could see her shivering under her torn sweater.  He reached out and spun her around.

 

She screamed, her hands coming up to clasp over her mouth as she jerked back.  He stepped towards her, closing their distance.

 

“I-Inuyasha,” she sputtered, taking a step back.

 

**“Do not speak,”** he demanded.   **“I have killed the wolves that aimed to eat you.  You will now give me what I want.”**

 

“Wh-wh-what’s that?”  Another step.

 

He reached out and grabbed her arm, yanking her back to him, and dropped his head to again nuzzle at her neck.   **“You know what it is I must take from you.”**

 

“But I don’t, Inuyasha, I-”

 

He snorted.  Insolent female.  It was no secret how youkai claimed what was theirs.  He would not play into her ridiculous games.  He trailed his free hand up her arm, which hung limp at her side, trailed his claw along her shoulder, her clavicle, up her neck.

 

Her breath quickened, now in tune with the blood that pumped through him.  He would have her before the night was over.  He gripped her jaw with his fingers and crushed his mouth to hers.

 

_ Fuck _ , she was exquisite.  Her taste drove him forward, her tongue sweeter than anything he’d sampled before.  He would-

 

She yanked back away from him.  “No!” she shouted, her arm swinging out, her closed fist catching him on his jaw.

 

Inuyasha took a step back, astounded.

 

Never… never had any of his conquests...

 

Her eyes widened.  “No,” she whispered, again, taking a step back.  Then another.  She turned and ran.

 

He gave chase.

 

Leaping to the canopy he easily followed her, dropping down to cut off her path and drive her towards where she’d pointed out the shard to his hanyou self.  She was mistaken if she thought she could escape him.

 

Up the mountainside she ran, panting and gasping and struggling to push forward.  She was slow.  And clumsy.  Inuyasha easily swooped down and scooped her up, leaping over the last bit of slop before landing on the small mesa and dropping her from his arms.  The mesa was flat for the most part, just one final peak rose above them to their right, and Inuyasha could see the mouth of a cave at the base of it, a few feet higher than where they stood.  Huge, naked, mountain rock piled one over the other to form the lip of the cave, jutting out into a natural terrace overlooking the mesa.

 

He could smell them inside the cave, the wolf youkai.  He knew their smell.  He had been there many times before, bathed in wolf blood, just as he was now.  But this was the first time he was out from under that  _ bitches _ control.  This time he would do things  _ his _ way.

 

Obtaining the jewel was the only way to ensure that he would stay as he was.  As he  _ should _ be.  The power Inuyasha could feel throughout his body… the way his youkai blood pumped in his veins… he would not go back to being less than he was now.  He would piece the Shikon no Tama back together and keep himself complete.

 

What-was-his attempted to slink away from him, but he whipped around and shot a warning growl her way.  She froze, eyes wide, her gaze meeting his own.

 

**“It is here, yes?”**

 

She had the right sense to nod.

 

He stepped towards her, reached out and wrapped his fingers in her hair, gripped it at her scalp and drew her to him.  Her eyes closed, tears damp at her cheeks.  Inuyasha inhaled.  Her sweet skin mixed together with the salt of her tears.  He wanted another taste and so he did, drawing a slick line from her jaw up to her cheekbone.

 

He felt her shiver under him, and he growled in response.

 

**“Soon, female,”** he promised, reveling in the way she whimpered in return,  **“after I rid us of these pesky wolves.”**

 

“W-we just need the shard, Inuyasha.  That’s all we need.  We don’t need to-”

 

He snarled and gave her a shake.  What-was-his should not speak unless he allowed her to.  Especially now.  Because he could smell him there, behind him.  He could hear the movements from inside as one of them moved out from the cave and into the moonlight.

 

A snarl ripped through the air, heavy and deep.  “Mutt.  You dare to return?”

 

Inuyasha turned, his grip loosening in his female’s hair.  He released her as he faced his opponent, keeping his body between the two of them.   **“And who might you be?”**

 

His yellow eyes gleamed in the dark.  “I am the Wolf King.  And you will call me Kouga.”

 


	44. The Wolf King

 

Kagome

 

There were a few moments, up until this point, that Kagome really felt she’d done something worthy with her life.

 

Saving Souta from being run over by a car when he was four.

 

Standing up to the bullies in middle school when they demanded she also ignore the weird girl that sat in the back.

 

Giving up her school lunch to the kid in her freshman class who never seemed to have money for his own.

 

But for the most part, Kagome’s life had been filled with her own selfishness.  Her looks and her clothes and her friends, the parties she went to and lied to her parents about, the thoughts she had about wanting more than her silly life was able to give her…  All of it mattered.

 

Until it didn’t.

 

And now, as her feet dangled over the edge of the cliff, only an empty chasm of trees and dry river rock below her, her hands clasped onto the arm of the wolf youkai that squeezed its fingers tight around her throat... a calmness overcame her.

 

Inuyasha’s eyes were on her.  His body was hollowed into the cliff wall, the force of the strike he’d received cracking the rock around him.  Blood dripped from his hairline, soaking into the swollen skin around his eye.  His broken arm hung limp at his side.

 

“Inuyasha-” she called out to him, just as the fingers around her neck loosened.

 

His eyes mimicked hers, widening in fear.

 

But Kagome… Kagome was calm.

 

The wind rushed through her hair, whipping it up into a frenzy and blocking her peripherals as the cliff face began to float away.  Her arm reached out, wishing with everything she had inside her that she could touch him one last time.  To tell him… to tell him…

 

Everything would be okay.

 

Because if this was it, and Kagome’s final, worthwhile deed had been to show Inuyasha, even if just a little, even if just a bit, that there was someone out there that cared about him…  That there was someone who wanted his freedom… Who knew that he  _ deserved _ his freedom, just as much as he did…

 

It was enough.  It was worth never seeing her family again, never seeing her friends.  Everyone deserved to know they had someone out there who loved them for who they were… Even someone as broken on the inside as Inuyasha.

 

Her eyes began to close, because soon she’d be gone, and if Kagome was being honest with herself, she didn’t want to see her end rushing up to meet her.  She’d rather see…

 

_ No _ , her eyes snapped open,  _ I actually see… _

 

It was his face, framed by his beautiful, silver-white hair, as he teetered on the edge of the cliff for just a moment.

 

And then he was  _ flying _ towards her, falling faster than she was, his good arm reaching out for her.  She called to him, her eyes watering, elation rushing through her.  Her words were lost in the wind.

 

He gripped onto her shoulder and whipped himself around so he was cocooning her body, a protective shield between herself and the ground.

 

She wanted to tell him, to tell him how much love she felt for him in that moment - how she would fearlessly do anything for him, even jump from a cliff to chase after him, just as he had for her.

 

But then his lips were pressed against her ear, his breath a warm respite against the cold.

 

“I’ve got you,” he said, comforting and protective, his arm squeezing her against him, a refusal to let go.  “I-”

 

She felt the impact, through every part of her.

 

And Inuyasha was gone.

.

.

Was it luck or not, that Kagome had gotten roughed up and left inside the museum that fateful night?  That she had, rightfully so, thought she was dreaming when Inuyasha appeared to her, grumpy and wonderfully otherworldly?

 

Was it luck that her side had been ripped open, the jewel glistening and slick, shattering into a million pieces and scattering?  That the woman claiming to be Kagome’s past would try over and over again to see her forgotten?  To see her dead?

 

Was it luck that for whatever reason, she had decided to help Inuyasha, in hopes that maybe she could right everything that had gone wrong once more?

 

After all, Kagome had always considered herself lucky.

 

So was it luck, then, that he was now standing before her?  Eyes blood red, jagged streaks of color ripped across his face, fangs protruded, claws extended, looking as if he would devour her at any moment...  Was it luck?

 

Was she still lucky?

 

He had just licked her, a few moments ago.  Dragged his tongue from her jaw to her cheek, catching the tears she felt soaking her face.  It unnerved her, the way he was now, because even though she’d seen him change before, even though she’d seen his face change after she’d freed him from the mirror in the attic and he’d whisked her away from her dying friends, there had still been some of  _ himself _ in there.  He’d been with it enough to know her, to talk to her in his own voice, to… to  _ control _ himself.

 

But this Inuyasha… the way he was now…  There  _ was _ no control.  The hanyou she’d come to know so well was gone, and something far more sinister had taken his place.

 

She shivered under him, a reflex against the way his eyes gazed at her, full of possession and anger, against the memory of him gripping her jaw in his hand and forcing a bruising kiss on her lips.

 

And what she hated more than anything was that her body still responded to him like it always had, since she first laid eyes on him.

 

Lucky her.

 

He growled as she tried to inch away.

 

For all she knew about youkai and their customs, which was basically nothing, she knew a warning growl when she heard one, and she one-hundred percent believed that the rage she saw bubbling inside him had a short, violent circuit.

 

**“Soon, female,”** he said, and a whimper slipped from her at the sound of his voice, at the way he no longer called her by her name.   **“After I rid us of these pesky wolves.”**

 

She pushed back the question that bubbled up against her lips, about what ‘soon’ and ‘after’ implied, because she already knew what he was thinking.  Like a dog, he was now easy to read and obvious with intent.

 

She knew what his eyes were telling her.

 

But that wasn’t important now.  She’d already seen him ‘rid’ himself of the wolves.  Watched as he moved effortlessly, his face no longer cloaked in pain, but in utter, unrestrained glee as he tore through the youkai that stood before him, then through the wolves that surrounded him.  Each movement mechanical.  Each movement deadly.

 

_ “You don’t know the meaning of cruel,” he’d said after she begged him to turn himself into Kikyou for the return of her family.  “You have no idea what that  _ bitch _ makes me do under her control.  You have no idea the nightmare-inducing acts I’ve been forced to commit!  Cruel would be taking me back and handing me over!” _

 

_ Kagome could only shake her head in disbelief.  “What does she make you do that’s so awful?” _

 

_ “You don’t want to know.” _

 

_ “I do!  I want to know what she makes you do that causes you to hate her so much!” _

 

_ “She fucking makes me hunt down and kill youkai and hanyou.  She makes me track down youkai, ones that have done  _ nothing _ to harm humans, ones that are doing nothing but living their lives peacefully and rip their fucking throats out.  Every time I get out of the mirror I murder ten more of my people.  And that’s not even the worst of it.  Don’t you fucking talk to me about cruel.” _

 

Kagome knew that Inuyasha wanted to use the jewel to become full youkai permanently; he had stated more than once that he would then be able to control his youkai half.  And now that he was out from under Kikyou’s spell for the time being… now that he was free to move about without her demanding where to go or what to do…

 

Well, she wasn’t  _ making _ him do it now.  And the bloodlust was still there.  He was still murdering youkai.

 

And sure, they’d attacked first.  They’d dropped her off a cliff, for fuck’s sake.  But at least before he’d turned, Inuyasha had been running as much as possible, keeping hidden as much as possible, killing as few as he possibly could.

 

What was Inuyasha now, if not a monster?  What was he now if not what he never wanted to become in the first place?

 

She couldn’t let him do it.  If he continued to slaughter the wolves, if he continued to murder them just for fun, and she was able to get him back to himself somehow… if he was able to return to hanyou, he would hate himself.

 

He would _ hate _ himself.

 

She couldn’t let him do it.

 

“W-we just need the shard, Inuyasha.  That’s all we need.  We don’t need to-”

 

He snarled and gave her a shake.  Shit.  Okay.  Wrong way to go about it.  Kagome hated the fact that she was so scared of him, but he was looking at her as if he’d rip her head off if she so much as moved an inch, and she wasn’t about to lose her head now.  Not after he’d sacrificed who he was to keep her alive in the first place.

 

She watched as he pushed his nose into the air and took a deep, heavy sniff.  The ears atop his head twitched and swiveled towards the cave that rose up behind them.  And in the dark, she saw him.  Tall and lithe, a large, fluffy tail swishing behind his legs.  He snarled, not unlike Inuyasha had earlier.

 

Her heart stopped.  Because she could  _ see _ him.   _ She could  _ see _ him _ !

 

Three spots of pulsating, lavender light, one radiating from each leg and one from his left arm.

 

The wolf youkai didn’t just have one shard.  They had three.  And all three were embedded in this one youkai.  Stunned, she tried to speak, but the words caught in her throat as others poured out of the cave behind him.

 

“Mutt,” the youkai called over the lip of the protruding rock, “you dare to return?”

 

Inuyasha turned, and Kagome felt the blissful loosening of his grip in her hair.   She breathed deep as he released her and faced the wolf youkai.

 

**“And who might you be?”**

 

For a moment, no one spoke, and Kagome’s heart thudded in her chest, filling her ears with thunder.

 

“I am the Wolf King,” the youkai finally said.  “And you will call me Kouga.”

 

**“Kouga…”** Inuyasha said his name as if a passing thought.   **“Kouga…  The name is familiar, but you’ll have to forgive me.  It’s been many years since I’ve stepped foot inside your filthy cavity.”**

 

The wolf youkai stood, arms folded across his chest.  His hair was deep black and long, tied away from his face with a band of some kind, possibly fur.  It wrapped tightly around his forehead, and matched the parts of his armor also covered in fur, at his shoulders, arms and legs.

 

“You dare come into my territory, kill those of my pack, kill my people, and then insult my home?” he said.  “You will show me respect, mongrel.”

 

**“And you will call me by my name.”**

 

The Wolf King spat at the ground in response.  “I will call you as I see fit.   _ Mutt _ .”

 

**“I’m no mutt, cur.”**

 

His eyes narrowed.  “I know exactly who you are.  You come to us as full youkai, but you are nothing but a  _ mutt _ , nothing but a  _ halfbreed _ at heart.  And still,” he continued, “as full youkai, it will not be enough.”

 

He leapt.

 

He landed right where Inuyasha stood, his fist driving deep into the level, mesa rock.  The light from his wrist pulsated, the force of the blow sending Kagome tumbling.  Her back slammed into the ground and she rolled, over and over until she came to a stop, adding more bruised skin to her already bruised body.  God, she was sick of falling.  She lifted herself up onto her forearms, looking for Inuyasha.

 

He was off to her right, having leapt out of the way.  His arms covered his face, bits of rock and debris tumbling harmlessly off his torn firerat coat.

 

She reached for her bow, an unconscious, automatic movement, before remembering how the youkai ripped it from her arms and tossed her over the edge cliff.  Before remembering that she could no longer draw on her powers.

 

...In fact, she hadn’t been able to draw her power from within since the attack from the Naraku youkai.  Since it slithered it’s tentacle around her neck and squeezed.

 

She hadn’t spoken of it out loud, partly because she didn’t want to believe it herself, but also because she’d been fucking pissed at Inuyasha, and she didn’t want to talk to him more than she had to.

 

She was hoping it would just come back.

 

...Dammit.  How could she help him if she had no weapons?  If her spiritual powers had completely abandoned her?  It wasn’t like she was fairly matched to youkai in speed and strength.

 

...So what was left?  Maybe if she could sneak up on the Wolf King somehow with something sharp… could she get at least one jewel shard from him?

 

She watched Inuyasha lower his arms.  His grin was wide and manic, his eyes sparkling, elated.   **“I will give it to you, wolf, you are stronger than your ancestors.”**

 

“I am the Wolf King.  Did you think this would be easy?”  He leapt again, this time a straight shot towards Inuyasha’s mid-section.

 

Inuyasha turned, just slightly, just enough for the Wolf King to pass him by, but he was quick, almost too quick for Kagome to see.  His legs dug at the rock underneath him and he shot back, his arm connecting to Inuyasha’s jaw.

 

“Inuyasha!”  Kagome screamed.  His face, his normal, beaten, destroyed face flashed across her mind, how he’d looked at the bottom of the craven, dead, she was certain.  Dead.

 

The blow sent him flying, and the Wolf King didn’t let up, lunging after him, legs ablaze with pulsating lavender.  Inuyasha raised his arm to block the punch, and it reflected harmlessly to the side.  His arm shot forward, swinging in an uppercut.  The impact was solid.  Kagome heard it connect, but as the force drove the Wolf King up into the air, his leg swept up and he flipped, the ball of his foot connecting to Inuyasha’s jaw.

 

Inuyasha’s head snapped back, his claws swiping at thin air even as he reeled back from the blow.  The Wolf King was on him again, his recovery speed too fast.  His movements  _ too fast _ .  Kagome watched as they brawled, as every strike Inuyasha dealt, three more landed to him, each blow a resounding ‘crack’ in Kagome’s ears.

 

She grit her teeth.  She couldn’t just stand there.  Desperate to do something,  _ anything _ , she glanced around.  There were no trees on the mesa, just rock.  Flat, broken…  _ shredded _ … rock.  At her feet, the scattered debris piled around, the sharp, jagged edges of splintered rock of all sizes were all she had to work with.

 

She would make it work, dammit.

 

Kagome bent down and picked up a piece of rock.  It was particularly sharp and felt clunky and rough in her hand.  A bit painful too, the sides dug into the palm of her hand.  Still, she squeezed it.  If she could get close… maybe if the Wolf King was distracted enough…?

 

She crept forward, step by step as the two youkai battled it out, trying to pull from within her the same warmth she’d grown accustomed to handling.   She kept her eyes trained on them as best she could, the light from the jewel shards in the Wolf King’s legs a beacon for their location.

 

Her powers still failed her.

 

She was poised to attack when hands grabbed at her arms, claws digging into her skin.

 

Shit, she’d forgotten about the others up by the cave!  She yelped and spun, her hand coming up to strike with the rock she held.  Too slow.  Fingers gripped her wrist and forced her arm back, back, back until she couldn’t stand the strain against her wrist and elbow.  She dropped her weapon.

 

“Here we are, I’ve got the bitch now,” said the youkai.  It was the same one.  The one that ran from Inuyasha in the clearing.  What had his friend called him?  Hokuto?  She could see him better in the light of the jewel shards, deep shadows flicking across his face as the Wolf King moved in frantic bursts behind them.  His rust-color hair was sweaty and tangled, the fur on his shoulders making him seem bigger than he actually was.

 

“This is the one that survived the fall?”  Another asked to her right.

 

“She’s the one.  The hanyou protected her.  She is special to him.”

 

“His woman then?”

 

“Must be.  Although,” said leaning in and sniffing deep at her scalp, “she’s unclaimed.”

 

“Not his woman then.  Why does he care?”

 

The one called Hokuto shrugged.  “Doesn’t matter.”

 

“She’s human.  She’s worthless.”

 

“Oi, fuck you!” Kagome spat, kicking out and landing her toes right between Hokuto’s legs, where his balls were.  It didn’t go without notice that she was sounding more and more like Inuyasha.

 

“Fuck!” he roared, his grip loosening.  He flung her towards his companion.  “Hold the bitch, and watch her legs, dammit!” he said as he dropped to his knees and cupped the tender area.

 

“Let go of me!  Let go!” Kagome struggled against the second pair of arms.  She was sick of everyone around her being so much stronger than she was.  She slammed her head back, hoping to catch his nose, but only managed to snap her head to her shoulders.

 

“Tch, stay still, human.”  He gave her a shake.

 

“Goddammit, stop shaking me!  Inuyasha!” she screamed, because even the way he was now, she’d rather take her chances with him than with the bastard holding onto her.

 

“Shut up!” he snapped, slapping her across the face and giving her another shake.  “Don’t think I won’t eat you right here.”

 

Kagome lifted up her leg again, attempting to catch him like she had Hokuto, but he maneuvered away from her kick.

 

“Fucking bitch, I warned you.”  His fingers wrapped around the side of her head, and she strained helplessly against him as he pushed her head to the side, exposing her neck.  “I’ll silence you forever.  See how well your dog behaves then!”

 

She opened her mouth to scream his name.

 

A gust of wind and the crack of bone on bone.  Her head was free.  Her arms were free.  She took a step and turned to see Inuyasha.  His hand shot to her arm and he pushed her back.

 

**“You have touched what is mine,”** he spat eyes pinned,  **“You will die for it.”**

 

“She is unclaimed!” shouted the wolf youkai.

 

**“She will be claimed by the time the night is over.  You, however, will be dead.”**  He lifted the youkai up by his armor.

 

“Inuyasha wait!”  Kagome reached up and grabbed at his firerat coat, an attempt to get him to look her way.  “Wait, the Wolf King, he-”

 

**“Female, you will stand back and shut up,”** he spat, brushing her off.

 

“No, but he-”

 

He didn't give her a second thought, bringing the struggling youkai in his hand down onto the ground with all his might.  Head connected to rock and he was gone.

 

“Mutt, you dare run from me?” shouted the Wolf King.

 

Inuyasha spun, whipping Kagome around so she was behind him, and brought his arms up to block the kick.  His feet dug into the ground, taking most of the impact himself.  Still, he pushed back into Kagome, knocking her over.

 

She glanced to her right.  The light was gone from the eyes of the unfortunate youkai who’d tried to eat her only moments ago.  He lay still, as still as he ever would, from now until forever.  Inuyasha grunted above, and Kagome scooted back as the Wolf King pushed him towards her, attack after attack connecting more than not.

 

She refused to let it end here.  She refused to give up and sit back while Inuyasha fought for his life.  They had survived, time after time, only for it to come to this?

 

“Inuyasha!” she screamed, hoping he’d be able to focus on her words.  “Shards!  He has Jewel shards in his legs!”

 

Mistake.  It was a mistake.  Inuyasha froze, just as a kick, whipping around in an arch, connected to the side of his face.  It blew him sideways and into the cliff wall, the force causing bits of the naturally formed balcony at the lip of the cave to fall down around him.

 

“No!”  Kagome cried.

 

All was silent.

 

She could hear her heart thudding in her chest.

 

“You.”

 

She glanced up, eyes wide.  The Wolf King stood over her.  His ears were sharp and pointed, as was his nose.  His yellow, slitted pupils bore into her, searching, as if able to read her thoughts.

 

“What did you just say?”  he asked, his tone rasped and harsh.

 

“I…” was all she managed before her voice trailed off.

 

“How did you know, human?”  He took a step towards her.  “How did you know of my jewel shards?”

 

She scooted back, but she couldn’t move much further.  Only a foot or so away lay the edge of the mesa - where a drop would certainly mean her death this time.  “I didn’t… I mean, I don’t…”

 

“I heard you loud as day, woman.  You can detect the jewel shards.”

 

It wasn’t a question.  Kagome wracked her brain for the right words.  What was the right thing to say?  Which would allow her to survive, and which would cause her death?  She opened her mouth to speak, hoping she was choosing correctly.

 

Laughter floated across the mesa, an empty, mechanical sound.  Louder and louder the laughter grew, and as the dust cleared, Inuyasha stepped down onto the rock,

 

His left cheek was swollen, a consequence of taking the kick head-on.  But his smile overtook his face.  No pain showed in his red eyes.

 

**“So, Wolf, your secret is out.”**

 

“It’s no secret, Dog.”

 

**“Oh, but it is.  Because once I take them back - and I** **_will_ ** **take them back - you will be nothing.  Just another bastard, just another weakling.  Just another fool.”**

 

“Do not take my use of the jewels as a sign of weakness,” he warned, and reached down, quicker than Kagome could react, to pick her up and throw her over his shoulder.  “But let’s talk about your secret, Mutt.  The one you’ve kept hidden in your human.”

 

**“You will let what-is-mine go.”**

 

“You mean your shard detector.”

 

**“Keh.  The female is useless.  She spoke a lucky guess.  I only mean to take her as mine until I am done with her.”**

 

His words hit her in the chest and sunk deep inside.  She tried to tell herself,  _ no.  No, he is not himself.  He doesn’t know what he’s saying. _

 

...But it was him.  Even though he was different, it was still a part of him - still who he was inside.  And the knowledge that her usefulness is what kept her close to him, that it was the reason he kept her around…

 

“You’ll have to wait your turn then, dog.  She is unclaimed.  She is now mine.”

 

“Goddammit, I don’t belong to anyone!  I belong to myself!”  She kicked at his front and slammed her fists into the armor at his back.  She tried to grab his tail and pull it, but she couldn’t reach down far enough.  “Put me down, you idiot!”

 

“She’s got spirit,” the Wolf King remarked.

 

**“You will let her go.”**

 

“I will not,” he said, and then they were running.  He leapt, and the weightlessness of the jump caught the scream in Kagome’s throat, her stomach flipping over as they fell back to the ground.  He landed, and they were in the cave, running down twisting tunnels.

 

She struggled against his steel hold, but he only squeezed tighter.

 

“Stay still, woman,” the Wolf King chided.  “Only a few moments more.”

 

Well, what the hell did that mean?  A few minutes more until what?  Before she could figure his words out, he dumped her onto the floor.  Kagome sat up and glanced around, taking stock of her surroundings.

 

Pulsating lavender lit up the small chamber.  It was empty and hollow, with large chains attached to the walls about halfway back, hanging limp and pooled at the cave floor.

 

_ Oh shit no _ .  Was he going to chain her up?  Was he going to fucking _ chain her up _ ?  She scrambled back, pressing herself into the wall, her arms up, ready to fight him until she died, because no way in hell was he going to fucking chain her to the goddamn walls in this cave with no sunlight.

 

“Just relax, it’ll be over in a moment,” he muttered.

 

“ _ What _ will be over?  What the hell are you planning to do with me?”

 

His chuckle was boyish.  It was  _ boyish _ and it caught her off guard.  “Wait and see, detector.”

 

Oh, great.  Another name given to her, in replace of her own.

 

She heard it then, his tearing and snarling.  It was Inuyasha coming for her.

 

Hope rose anew in her chest.  He would get her out.  He would get her out and she would figure out some way to get him back to his hanyou self, and they would get the hell out of Wolf Territory, because fuck this place!  Fuck the shards, Kagome just wanted out.  She wanted out.

 

_ She wanted out! _

 

And then he was there, in the entrance to the hollowed space, filling it up with his shoulders.   **“Give.  Her.  Back,”** he growled.

 

Elation rushed through her.  Kagome glanced up at the Wolf King’s face, expecting to see grim determination.  But something else was there.  Something…  _ Something… _

 

No.

 

“No, Inuyasha wait!” she shouted.  Because it wasn’t to trap Kagome.  Kagome hadn’t been brought to this cave to be held here.

 

No, it was a trap for _ Inuyasha _ , and she was the bait.

 

He ignored her warning, growling as he lunged forward.  The Wolf King dodged and spun out of the way, and Inuyasha turned again to face him, now between Kagome and the enemy.

 

**“Stop dodging and face me!”** he roared, and took a step forward.

 

“Now!” the Wolf King called.

 

The chains snapped up, whipping around Inuyasha’s arms and legs and pulling them taught, so his toes scraped the floor.

 

Kagome screamed as Inuyasha struggled, shouting profanities and grappling with the chains holding him in place.  She watched as a grin spread across the Wolf King’s face, his fangs gleaming in the light of the jewel shards.  Other wolf youkai stepped out of the shadows to gather around him, gawking at Inuyasha as he thrust himself violently around, trying to break free.

 

Behind him, Kagome shook.  What was happening?  How had it come to this?  Was she also trapped here, stuck behind him?  If she moved forward, would she also be chained?

 

As if reading her thoughts, the Wolf King called out to her.  “Detector!” he said, “you may come out.  Be sure to give the mutt wide berth!”

 

Slowly, Kagome stood, her back scraping across the rock.  She narrowed her eyes.  She couldn’t trust him to tell the truth, obviously.

 

“Woman, you’re safe from him now,” the Wolf King continued, “no harm will befall you.”

 

She felt the maniacal laughter bubbling up from her chest, falling through her lips.  “Oh, okay,” she laughed, “okay, I’ll just be right there, then.”

 

She saw him frown through the gap between the cave wall and Inuyasha’s side.  The youkai next to him spoke up. “I think it’s sarcasm, Kouga,” he said.  “Humans are known to be very sarcastic.”

 

He nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer.  “Woman, you can sense the jewel shards.  I will promise you that the wolves will do you no harm.”

 

“We’re not going to eat her?” another one asked.

 

“Listen here,” the Wolf King said, stepping forward and turning his back to Inuyasha to face his pack, “anyone who touches the human shard detector will die by my hands.  You will see that no harm comes to her.  Is that understood?”

 

Sharp, confirmation replies echoed through the small cavern, and he turned back around, pleased with himself going by the smile on his face.  “Do you see?  Now come out of there, I can’t come in to fetch you.”

 

“W-why not?”  Kagome asked, hoping she sounded braver than she felt.

 

“Because the spell only works on youkai.  If I pass the spell wall, I too will be chained.”

 

Spell.   _ Spell _ .

 

“You… You  _ spelled _ him?” she exclaimed.

 

“Yes.”

 

“You can use magic?”

 

The Wolf King huffed, his nose wrinkling.  “Of course not!  Magic is not real, stupid woman.  The spell is binded exorcism.  We’ve been waiting for him for a very long time now.”

 

“Who… Who did the spell for you?” she asked, closing her eyes and praying he did not say her name.

 

“It was a wandering Monk, many moons ago.  We asked him for a spell, and he gave it to us.”

 

He was using the term ‘spell’, but it seemed more like what her grandfather did, and not the magical spelling that Kikyou and her monk performed.

 

No way was it the same monk they’d fought off in the attic.

 

So what was her next step, then?  To sit here?  Until she starved?  She couldn’t help Inuyasha from here, with no weapons and no way out, surrounded by wolves and youkai watching her every move.

 

She had to be stronger than she felt.  Even without her powers, she had to be brave.  Just like she’d told Shippou he was.  She had to be brave like Shippou.

 

“Brave like Shippou,” she whispered to herself, “brave like Shippou.”

 

Slowly, she moved towards Inuyasha, keeping her back pressed against the wall.  “You won’t hurt me?” she called out.

 

“You have my word, as the Wolf King.”

 

She carefully stepped over the lower chains, ducking so as not to touch the ones above.  She glanced at Inuyasha’s face.  It was unchanged, his eyes red, the streaks still on his face, his fangs still protruding past his lips.  He was panting, his lids heavy and half-closed.

 

“Is he… in pain?” she asked, pausing in her steps.

 

“It is…  _ uncomfortable _ … for him,” the Wolf King admitted.

 

“I don’t want him to be in pain,” she said.

 

“For now, it cannot be helped, but it is something we will talk over, once you are bathed and fed.”

 

Oh god, the magic words.  A bath.  Food.  She wanted to fall down and cry right then and there.  But still, she hesitated, glancing at all the faces peering at her from behind the Wolf King.

 

He must have sensed her hesitation, because he turned again to his pack.  “Everyone get back to your duties.  Gather and clean the dead.  We will have a burial ceremony at daybreak.”

 

Slowly the youkai shuffled away, until it was only her and him and Inuyasha behind them.

 

He coughed, glanced up at her and held out his hand.  “Come,” he said, “you must be very tired.”

 

With Inuyasha’s eyes on her back, Kagome slowly reached out and took the Wolf King’s hand.

 

 


	45. Into The Wolf Den

 

Kagome

 

It seemed like Kagome’s back was nothing but a tight jumble of muscle and nerves, clenched and ready for the Wolf King to strike out at her like he had at Inuyasha.  It helped only a little that he was holding her by the hand and not by her neck like most youkai had the habit of doing.

 

_ Will I ever be able to relax again _ ? she worried, as the Wolf King lead her up the twisting, dark tunnels and then down a grouping of others.  The possibilities of what he was planning rushed through her head, each sparking jolts of anxiety as she desperately tried to prepare herself for how she could escape each method of attack.  It didn’t help that the air reeked of sulfur, and as they moved deeper, the stench of sulfur grew stronger.

 

Her body screamed at her to just turn and run - to get out.  But she fought the instinct.  No way was she leaving Inuyasha in this deranged map of caves, chained up and defenseless…   _ Even though he’s turned into a total asshole, _ she thought.  Still, full youkai or not, if she planned on leaving Wolf Territory alive, it was going to be with him in tow.  She wouldn’t accept any other outcome.

 

As Kagome saw it, her only option was to sit and wait until she could hatch an escape plan.  ...Or until her powers returned, whichever came first.

 

Even now, she wondered, would the Wolf King lead her deeper and her deeper into the tunnels until she could no longer find her way out?  Would he eat her, like she'd originally thought, despite his insistence that he wouldn’t?

 

She didn't want to think about the other, terrible things that he might do to her.

 

...He was still holding her hand.

 

It was uncomfortable.  Warm and a little sweaty.  It felt strange.  Different.

 

It wasn't Inuyasha's.

 

But still, she kept it there, worried that pulling away would enrage this youkai, just like pulling away now seemed to enrage Inuyasha.  Her stomach churned as she again thought of his changes.  As a hanyou, he'd always been a bit rough, a bit stubborn and resistant.  But the way he acted towards her now...

 

She quickly blinked back her tears.  She didn’t want the Wolf King to think she was weak, so she dropped her gaze to hide them as they fell, trying to wipe them away and hoping it looked like she was wiping the blood and gore that had splattered onto her face instead.

 

It was then she noticed that the light from the jewel shards in the Wolf King’s legs were no longer the only source of light brightening up the hollowed tunnel.  She glanced up, curious, to see lit torches lining the walls every few feet.

 

She felt the breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding escape from her lungs.  It was comforting to know that at the very most, she had fire on her side.  If she was left alone at some point, at least she’d be able to see.

 

Around the next bend the Wolf King stopped in front of a tanned hide.  It was taught from wall-to-wall, leaving them unable to see what lay on the other side.  Kagome didn’t have to wonder for long, and couldn’t help the small gasp that slipped between her lips when the Wolf King swept aside the covering, opening the threshold to a cavern.

 

Large and spacious, the rocky edges and ceiling of the room had been carved smooth.  It was furnished with layers of pelts, piled on top of each other to create lofty spaces to lay down or sit comfortably.  A rude table made of wood sat in the center, to the right of a largish, unlit fire-pit, with a bear pelt underneath, its eyes open and unblinking, it's jaw stretched as if frozen in its final roar.

 

Off to the far left was a… pool, maybe?  It was natural, more of a spring, which explained the sulfur she could smell.  It bubbled up crystal blue and clear from somewhere below.  The pool was layered with three levels of shallow, rock-formed vats, each big enough to fit way more than one person.  A mini waterfall spilled from the top vat into the middle, then into the lowest, a bubbling cascade of water.  The sound of it soothed her soul.

 

"Where...?" was all she managed to ask, struck dumb by the beauty she hadn't been expecting.  It had been so long since she'd been in a room so luxurious, by caveman standards at least.

 

"These are my side chambers, meant for the women of my choosing," he said matter-of-factly.

 

Okay.  Okay, she'd question him about that later, when she'd felt him out a little more as was sure he wouldn’t rip her head off.

 

"Kouga," a voice called from the cavern entrance, startling Kagome from her astonishment.  Two wolf youkai, both female and lavishly dressed, stood waiting attentively at the entrance.  Thick, red and gold fabrics with shimmering trim were folded intricately over their shoulders and torso, tied with twisted cords and gathered with ornate pins.

 

"Yes, enter," the Wolf King ordered.

 

They moved gracefully across the floor, their arms filled with oils and salts and fabric that looked like what might be clothing.  Both women had solid, colorful stone pins held up by piles of hair, twisted and braided away from their face, eyes and lips painted, cheeks reddened.

 

For Kagome, it was the first time she’d seen a glimpse of youkai culture that wasn’t monsters and blood and eating humans.  They were tall and beautiful, and Kagome suddenly felt embarrassed in her frumpy jeans and sweater, covered in mud and gore, hair tangled and matted from her struggle against the wolves.  It figured that even so far out in the middle of nowhere, the pressure to look sharp and put-together still plagued her.

 

The Wolf King turned to her, his mouth a hard line. "Ikue and Maho will help you bathe and dress. Breakfast will be served in a few hours and you will be my guest. I have matters to attend to, so be sure to sleep until then." He paused, then added: "You look like you have not slept in a long time."

 

Her lips parted, and she hesitated before attempting a guess at how to address him. "Your… highness…?"

 

"Kouga."  Was it just her or did his lips pull up slightly at the corners?

 

"Kouga," she repeated.  She wanted to tell him it was a mistake, that she actually couldn't detect the shards and then beg to let her and Inuyasha go.  But the urge was irrational and she knew it. A response born from panic. Instead, she breathed out deep. "What will you do with Inuyasha?"

 

His chin jutted out, his eyes regarding her with what, ...wariness? Suspicion? She couldn't read his emotions as well as she'd come to read Inuyasha's.

 

"We'll discuss what is to become of the mutt and your future here with us in the morning.  Ikue, make sure she is scrubbed well."  Without a second glance, he turned and stalked out of the cave.

 

_ No! Don't leave me! _ she wanted to shout after him. She could feel the eyes of the two women on her back, could hear them whispering to each other. Kouga was obviously the leader of the wolf youkai in every sense of the word. She'd already seen those around him jump and hurry to carry out his demands, so it was unlikely that these two would disobey him and harm her.

 

But still.

 

She turned slowly, her eyes rising up to meet their yellow, curious ones. They also bore the slitted pupils that she'd come to associate with wolf youkai, enhanced by expertly applied makeup.  It was a strange thought, that something Kagome considered so human was a shared custom with youkai.

 

She tried to smile.  The corners of her lips lifted, uncertain as she felt out their response.

 

The one named Ikue sighed loudly.  Her hair was a deep, dark red that popped every time light from the bath shone upon it.  "Alright then, hurry it up,” She said, reaching out to where she'd placed her armful of jars. "Undress."

 

No smiles, then.  "Uh..."

 

The other, her hair a bright silver, rolled her eyes. "A human," she said, pointedly not at Kagome, "what is Kouga thinking?"

 

"Hell if I know," Ikue answered, opening the jars and moving them around the edge of the pool.  "I heard from Ginta that she's not just a human.  Something to do with a detection power she has."  She straightened out and eyed Kagome up and down.  "Help her undress, Maho.  I think she might be stupid."

 

Kagome opened her mouth to retort, but Maho beat her to it, wrinkling her nose in disgust.  "But she smells."

 

"Yes, all humans smell, and this one has been fumbling along in the forest for who knows how long, and with that  _ dog _ ," she said, bitterness and hatred threaded between her mention of him.  "Just get her ugly clothes off."

 

Maho reached out towards Kagome, who jerked back, arms up, ready to fight if need be.

 

She huffed, offended. "What are you doing, you stupid girl? Get undressed!" She reached out again.

 

Again, Kagome stepped back. "I can do it myself," she managed, eyes darting from one to the other.

 

Ikue put her arms on her hips, as if talking to a petulant child. "Then take them off.  We don't have all night, and Koga will be angry if you're not bathed and rested by morning."

 

"Don't I... Can't I have some privacy?"

 

"Privacy?" she laughed. "Humans and their modesty. Don't worry, little girl, we've seen naked humans before."

 

“We’ve  _ eaten _ naked humans before,” Maho corrected.

 

Kagome grit her jaw against the threat, her fingers fisting in her palms.  She tried again to pull her powers forward with no luck.  "I'd prefer-"

 

Ikue took a step forward. "There will be no privacy.  Kouga has taken you under his wing, but it does not mean that he trusts you to be left on your own.  You will undress here and we will bathe you so you do not stink up our home."

 

"I can wash myself," she insisted.

 

"Foolish human, shut your mouth and do as Ikue says," Maho snapped. She reached out and grabbed onto Kagome's wrist and pushed her forward, towards the pool.

 

Begrudgingly, Kagome did as she was told. Hands shaking from exhaustion, from fear, from frustration and anger and hatred, she slowly pulled her sweater up over her head, folding it as best she could and laying it onto the pile of fur pelts that made up the bed.  She unhooked the button of her jeans, slipping them off inch by inch.  The jewel shards were nestled there, inside her pocket, still wrapped up in the ripped patch of Inuyasha’s white tee.  She carefully gripped her jeans in her hands as she stepped out of them, keeping the jewels hidden within.  She folded those as well and placed them on top of her sweater and moved to her undershirt next. It was caked with sweat and blood, and it felt crunchy in places as she pulled it off her skin.

 

Ikue and Maho both watched, indifferent.  Bored, even.

 

Finally naked, and well aware of how bad she actually stunk, Kagome took the few steps up the lumpy rocks that curved around the edge of the pool and slipped in.

 

It was glorious.  The water was warm -  _ so warm _ \- and it was a clear, blue color that seemed lit up from below.  It took a few moments to realize that there were dozens of glow worms hiding amongst the crevices of the rocks, which created the luminosity.

 

She felt hands in her hair, rough, claws scraping at her scalp as Ikue scrubbed her head with a sweet smelling soap.  It lathered and foamed, and when instructed her to dunk her head, Kagome obeyed, staying underwater as long as she could, relishing the way the warmth enveloped her before coming up for breath.

 

She listened as best she could to the two women chatter, but it was hard to stay focused when the white, powdery stuff that Maho used to scrub at her skin smelled  _ so _ good.  It was hard to stay focused as Ikue turned Kagome so her gaze faced the wall of the cave and began to detangle her hair, twisting and pulling at the strands.  It was hard to stay focused as the sulfuric water soaked into her body and warmed her bones, lulling her into a trance.

 

“Will he bed her?”  Maho was asking.  She had finished scrubbing at Kagome’s back and was now shuffling around the middle of the room.

 

Kagome bit back a moan.  No, no, she didn’t want to listen to this.  She wanted to stay blissfully unaware and never step out of the water, to cocoon herself in the tub and block out the world.  She tried to dunk back under the water, but Ikue caught her arm and pulled her back up.

 

“You never know, some youkai like to keep humans around for pleasure,” she said matter-of-factly, releasing Kagome’s arm and continuing to detangle her hair.  “Although it’s hard to imagine Kouga lowering himself to such…  _ unpleasant _ means…”

 

“He couldn’t possibly be that desperate.”

 

Ikue sighed, seemingly unaware that she was pulling a bit too hard at Kagome’s hair.  “What do you even care, Maho?  It’s not like you’re in the running.”

 

Kagome managed to turn enough to see Maho step away from prepping her bed.  She pushed her bottom lip out, her brows furrowing.  “You never know…”

 

“Kouga understands his duties well, he will not sully his royal line,” Ikue insisted, finishing with Kagome’s hair and stepping back.  “Come now, Maho, get her up.”

 

Kagome clenched her jaw and resisted slapping up the water into Maho’s face as she reached in and pulled her from the bath.

 

_ Just wait it out, _ she repeated to herself.   _ Just wait it out. _

.

.

Kagome lay in the bed of pelts.  It was softer than what she’d been accustomed to sleeping on lately, but it wasn’t exactly  _ soft _ .  The layers were heavy, and she was already sweating due to the thick, incredibly soft fabric that made up her nightgown.  Despite winter creeping ever closer and the brisk wind whistling through the open tunnels, she was overheated.

 

The relief she had felt at Ikue and Maho’s departing had long ago evaporated, and a tangle of nerves had taken its place.  She turned onto her side, restless and wide awake, trying to calm her thoughts, trying to convince herself that by keeping her mouth shut and going along with the wolf youkai, everything would be okay.  That she was doing the right thing.

 

Her nerves stayed where they were.  It didn’t help that every time she closed her eyes, the horrible events that had taken place over the last few weeks flashed behind her lids.

 

She thought back to the tentacle youkai -  _ Naraku _ , Shippou had called it, and how it had slithered itself around her again, squeezing at her neck as she desperately attempted to pool her powers into the arrowhead and stab the rubbery appendage with it.

 

But it hadn’t worked.

 

It  _ wasn’t working _ .

 

Running back towards Inuyasha through the forest, desperate to get back after abandoning him to fetch her cobbled-together bow and arrows, she had tried to gather her powers, to no avail.  Even as she lay over his shoulder as he ran from the wolfpack, and she pushed herself up to aim her arrows, there was nothing.  Nothing but the wood and her fingers and her desperate plea for them to hit their mark.

 

Which they did, thank the gods.

 

But when Inuyasha became overpowered by sheer numbers, she could do nothing but aim and fire her arrows, trying not to think of what would happen when she ran out.

 

And when the wolf youkai gripped her by the throat and dangled her over the cliff edge, her powers still would not come.  It was as if they had abandoned her.  She could no longer call up the only true defense she had against the youkai.

 

_ I was weak and pathetic before, but there’s no doubt about it now,  _ she thought.  Without her powers and without her bow, she really  _ was _ nothing but a shard detector.

 

So what were her options?

 

She couldn’t fry Kouga, or the two youkai women who had forced her to bathe, so she couldn’t possibly get Inuyasha out of the cave and away from Wolf Territory.  She couldn’t do anything but lay there and worry.

 

What had happened to her?  Why was she broken?

 

Shippou was also a cause for concern.  When she’d last laid eyes on him, he had been standing at the lip of their makeshift home, his eyes wide and shining in the firelight as she ordered him to stay put.

 

...Was he still in the cave, hiding behind her giant, yellow pack and waiting for her to return?

 

Kagome sat up and slipped out of bed, as quiet as humanly possible.  She could no longer just lie there and roll around with her stomach tied in knots.  The stone floor was cold and hard against the pads of her feet, chilling her toes despite the warm humidity of the room.  Slowly, she moved towards the hallway, pulling aside the flap to the entrance.

 

It was dark, save for the single, lighted torch to the left.  It was high above her head and she had to stretch up on her toes to reach the crude, wooden handle.  She glanced back into her room, her eyes landing on her clothes still folded neatly at the foot of her bed.  Should she grab the jewel shards?  

 

...No, they’d probably be safer where they were, nestled tightly in the offending smelling fabric.  No one would want to get close to them even if they knew they were there.  Mind made up, Kagome crept out into the hallway.  The light cast jagged shadows across the walls as she moved, trying to remember the twists and turns Kouga had led her down earlier.

 

_ What the hell do you think you’re going to accomplish? _ she berated herself as she wandered through the dark.   _ Even if you manage to find Inuyasha, how are you going to free him and get him out of Wolf Territory without him going postal and murdering more wolves? _

 

She pushed forward, but no matter how many turns she made, nothing looked familiar.  It became apparent that yeah, she was completely lost.  She wasn’t even aware at this point whether she was moving deeper into the mountain or not.  She had no sense of which way was which.

 

Taking in a deep breath, she turned back.  Obviously this had been a stupid mistake.  She should just go back and wait for the wolves to fetch her.

 

_ Like a good, little girl, _ she sneered to herself, hating the way Kouga had effectively trapped her in the cave.  They hadn’t even left a guard outside her room in case she tried to escape.  They were so damn sure of the control they had over her freedom

 

“Get a fucking grip, Kagome,” she mumbled to herself.  She was so angry and focused on trying to find her way back that she didn’t notice the purplish glow in the dark as she turned the bend, and let out a short scream when he appeared before her.

 

The fur band was gone from his forehead, a hair tie no longer holding up his hair, leaving it to fall around his face.  It was longer than she’d originally thought, down past his shoulders.  HIs armor was gone, only a pelt around his hips remained.  His eyes burned yellow in the dark.

 

“Kouga,” Kagome breathed, willing her beating heart to slow, “you scared me.”  She kept her gaze on him, but slipped her right foot back, ready to dart away if need be.  Not that it would help.  Stupid youkai and their ridiculous speeds.

 

But Kouga didn’t move to grab her.  In fact, he stayed stock still, as if made from stone.

 

“Where are you going, detector?”  he finally asked, his voice low and even.  Soft, even?  Was it her imagination, or was he trying to keep her calm?

 

Kagome cleared her throat and kept her voice as steady as she could manage.  “I want to see Inuyasha.”

 

His lips pulled down at the corners.  “He’s dangerous.  Don’t think he won’t harm you as he is now.”

 

“I’m aware.”

 

He fell silent, his eyes calculating.  After a moment, he let out a heavy sigh.  “You’re going the wrong way,” he said, turning and motioning her to follow him.  “You’ll get lost wandering around.  Daybreak is only an hour away.  Come and eat.”

 

She hesitated.  “I’m in my pajamas.”

 

He turned to glance at her over his shoulder.  “I see that,” he said, an amused smile on his lips.

 

“Maybe I should change first?”

 

“Don’t bother.  Breakfast will be held privately in my chambers, and I will see you dressed well enough for the ceremony at sunrise.  We will simply be discussing your future here with us.”

 

Kagome bit her lip as she once again followed him, fighting the urge to reply:  _ what future? _

 


	46. Trust

Kagome

If Kagome's room was the height of cave-apartment-chic, Kouga's enclave was like the palace version.

Large was not the correct word to describe it. It was huge. Massive. Multiple rooms ballooned out from the main one to create little seating areas, some small, some not-so-small, and each decorated to the tee with various colors and ornaments.

A fire pit, three times the size of her own and currently un-lit, was dug out of the very center, outlined with a spattering of leisure pelts and low-set tables, each with a torch that had been fashioned into a lamp to set the mood. The lamplight, along with the torches lining the walls, cast stark shadows, seemingly alive as they flickered across the floor. Kouga motioned for her to sit.

A few moments ago, as he had escorted her inside his chambers, he had pulled his hair back into a ponytail atop his head. He now sat across from her, his shoulders visibly relaxed, a change she'd noticed as soon as he'd crossed the threshold into his room.

 _It must be exhausting, being a king_ , Kagome thought, taking in the way he moved as he leaned back into his seat.

"I assume it's safe to say you got no rest," he said.

It was getting more difficult to keep her guard up. He was being so hospitable. "I'm… having trouble relaxing," she admitted.

"The bath didn't help? Were Ikue and Maho not useful?"

 _Useful isn't quite the word I'd use,_  she thought, pressing her lips together to refrain from speaking the words aloud. As hospitable as Kouga was being, she was still being careful not to offend him. "They were very helpful, thank you. It does feel nice to be clean again."

He snorted. "You certainly  _smell_  better, having washed that dog scent off of you."

"Hey-" she started, but stopped short at seeing his grin.

"Sorry, sorry," he chuckled, hands up as a request for forgiveness, "I can't help it. Dogs stink." His eyes shifted over her shoulder and he lifted his chin.

Curious, Kagome turned to see what had his attention. A smaller wolf youkai entered the room, followed by another, and then another, each with arms stacked with tableware and food. They busied themselves setting up the table. Platters of stews and finger foods, steamed veggies and warm bread were placed out in front of her, and in the center: a whole, roasted forest pig.

Oh no. It smelled  _so_  good. Kagome's mouth started to water. It had been so long since she'd eaten anything other than ramen and small forest creatures that she'd almost forgotten what well-cooked larger meat smelled like. Thankfully, Kouga insisted they eat before they talk, and she obliged, reaching for the pig immediately.

Heaven. It was heaven. It practically melted on her tongue. It was slightly different than she was used to, maybe it was cooked a different way? It made sense since she was pretty sure they didn't have modern ovens carved out into the walls of their cave. Still, it didn't matter. It was delicious, and she scarfed it down greedily.

She tried to block out the way Kouga looked at her as she scooped large portions of each platter onto her plate. He was curious and calculating, watching her movements as he slowly made his way through his meal.

Only minutes later did she sit back, satisfied and full.

"Now," he said, perking up a bit, "let's talk about that special ability of yours."

She knew it was coming. As hospitable as he was, it wasn't without a price, and she was expecting his question. She breathed in deep. "I think you've got the wrong idea about me."

His arms folded across his chest. "I don't."

She huffed. "I didn't come out here to be ordered around by more youkai, I already get enough demands from one. Inuyasha and I are working towards something. There are a lot of lives riding on us completing this goal."

"And what goal is that?"

"Does it matter?"

"It does."

"It doesn't," she argued, "but if you let him go, I promise we'll leave your territory, okay? I just… I can't go without him."

"No, you can't," he agreed, chewing up and swallowing the pig meat, "you can't go without him. But I also can't let you leave with him. You say this goal of yours has a lot of people riding on the outcome, but Inuyasha has murdered my people. And not just tonight either. I have grown up watching him rampage through my parent's territory quite a few times over the centuries. I have watched him kill with his hands. Always he comes, and always he destroys as many of us as he can." His eyes fixated on her. "So what about my people? Are they less worthy of life than yours are?"

...What could she possibly say to that? It was true. She was a total ass, pleading him to release Inuyasha. If she were in Kouga's shoes, she wouldn't let Inuyasha go, either.

"I'm assuming he didn't tell you anything about his history with us," he said when she didn't reply.

Kagome sat back, eyes locked onto her hands as they twisted in her lap. "No," she muttered under her breath, cheeks flushing with shame, "he told me."

"Has he?" Kouga's eyebrow shot up. "And you came back here with him? Why?"

"We didn't have a choice."

He placed his elbow on the table, his fist propping his head up as he studied her face. "There is always a choice."

Water filled her eyes.  _Was_  there a choice? Did she have a choice in the beginning, when she kissed Inuyasha out from his mirror the first time? Did she have a choice when she kissed him out a second time? A third? Was every step she made up until this point nothing but her own, devastating, destructive choices?

"You're crying?" he asked.

She blinked her tears back, wiping at the few traitorous ones that escaped and fell in fat droplets down her face. "Sorry," she said, because she couldn't think of what else to say.

"You can cry, I'm just surprised."

"Why?"

"I half expected you to rejoice at the death of my people."

She glared up at him through her tears. "I would never rejoice in the death of anyone,"  _except Kikyou_ , she added as an afterthought.

"I don't mean to offend you. I assumed that you were here to help in the slaughter of my people. You're the dog's companion, and it's obvious that your goal is to collect the Shikon jewel shards."

Her eyes widened. "How-"

He smirked. "It was obvious as soon as you pointed out where I hid them in my body. Shouted it out to the world, really."

"Sorry," she said again, "but I thought you might kill Inuyasha, and I can't do this without him."

His features softened, "do what?"

She pressed her lips together and folded her arms.

"I wish you'd tell me, I might be able to help."

"That's ridiculous, why would you help me?"

He inhaled deeply, then reached into his pelt. As soon as he pulled his hand away, she knew. Pinched between his fingers was a small, white pouch, the cloth wrapped up tight and tied in a knot. Bits of dried blood droplets were splattered against the fabric. She knew that bundle. She could see the glow from its center.

Kagome couldn't stop the gasp that slipped from between her lips, her eyes widening in fear.  _No… when had he…?_

"I can tell by your expression that you recognize this bundle."

"When…?" was all she managed to say.

"Ikue and Maho are  _very_  loyal. Maho found them in your clothing and brought them to me."

Dammit. When she was bathing Maho had been hustling around the room. Kagome had been so caught up in her amazing bath she hadn't thought to keep a close eye on her movements. Her heart squeezed in her chest. She brought her hand up to press against it, willing it to calm.

"I can hear it, detector," he said, "your heart is running wild." He sat back, getting comfortable in his pelt-chair. "I can understand why. This is a large portion of the jewel you've managed to collect for yourself. Or…" he added, "for your dog."

"Please give them back," she said through grit teeth. Shit.  _Shit_. Inuyasha would kill her.

"I can't see him being very understanding about you losing them. And adding onto the ones I already possess would give me even more strength to fight against him."

Kagome felt her cheeks flush red. Her heart hammered in her chest and her fists squeezed in her lap. She narrowed her eyes at Kouga's cocky grin. What was he playing at? What was his game?

"Is that what you want them for?" she finally snapped, her anger getting the better of her. "To become stronger? To expand your territory? Rule over humans? Take over the world?  _What_!?" The last word was harsher then she'd intended. So much for seeming calm and collected. Her chest rising and falling, she stared Kouga down.

The corners of his mouth quirked up into a smile. "We haven't known each other very long, detector, and you're human. I can't expect you to know anything about me. But I will tell you that I do not seek world domination. I don't have the time for it." His smile turned into a full-blown grin, which probably looked more menacing than he meant it to, what with his sharp fangs poking out and all. "I am not the same as your dog. I do not seek to oppress and murder, I seek to keep my tribesmen safe and my territory looked after. Unlike your friend, the only harm I wish on others are the ones who wish to harm us first."

"Inuyasha is not looking to oppress anyone, he just wants to get out of his curse!" As soon as the words left her mouth, Kagome knew it was a mistake. Her eyes widened and she brought her hand up to cover her mouth.

Kouga's smile wiped clear from his face. His eyebrow lifted quizzically towards his hairline, his eyes pinning her into place. "What curse?" he asked, the words drawn out slowly.

A weakness. It was a weakness of Inuyasha's that she'd just given away. The idea that the wolves might get their hands on the mirror and stuff him back inside and then do god-knew-what with him flashed through her head.

...But then again, the mirror was safely tucked away in the cave back down the mountain. At least, she  _hoped_  it was still safely tucked away in the cave. And as far as she knew, the only way to get Inuyasha back into the mirror was via the sun, or by him walking into it of his own volition, and she knew  _that_  was never going to happen. She was pretty confident that Kouga wouldn't risk moving Inuyasha from the spell that now bound him inside the cave, and there was no way sunlight could reach into its depths.

Kagome could try and free Inuyasha herself, but as he was now… What would he do once he was free? He obviously wasn't one for reason as a full youkai. She knew trying to get him to focus on completing the quest would be harder than it had been up until now. While hanyou Inuyasha had been overly confident and cocky, it wasn't even close to youkai Inuyasha.

"Detector," Kouga growled, pulling her out of her thoughts, " _what curse_?"

Kagome worked the muscle in her jaw. "What do you think he's been rampaging around your territory for? The fun of it?"

"It's no secret that dog and wolf youkai are not good friends."

"Yeah, but do you have any other dog youkai tearing through your territory?"

"No, although I don't trust that Sesshoumaru bastard to the west."

Who the heck was...

 _No. No, nevermind, I don't want to know_ , she thought. "I'll say that Inuyasha, as he is now, is not normally how he is. He's a-"

"Hanyou, yes."

She paused. "You know about hanyou?"

He wrinkled his nose. "Of course. There are a number of them. Companionship between our two species is not all that rare. We share a lot of the same history, humans and youkai. Inuyasha has been around for a very long time. Although I admit there have been no sightings of him in his hanyou form for the last few centuries." He paused, thoughtful. "Are you're telling me he's under a curse right now? Is that what keeps him in his full youkai form?"

Her teeth snapped shut. It was  _technically_  true, but… "Yes," she replied, her semi-lie twisting in her gut.

Kouga sat back in his seat again, his hand up to his chin, thoughtful. "And what do you plan on doing with the jewel once Inuyasha has broken the curse?"

The thought hadn't even occurred to her. Inuyasha wanted to make himself full youkai, sure, but the jewel… Say Inuyasha did achieve his goals, freeing himself from Kikyou and transforming himself permanently into what he was now? Would Kagome just continue to carry it around with her? Was that even possible?

"The jewel," he repeated. "What will you do with it?"

"Ah, I…" she scrambled to come up with a plausible answer -  _any_  plausible answer - but it was too late. He was on to her.

This time his smile was slow. Lazy. It spread across his face, his fangs glistening in the lamplight. He leaned forward, his elbows on the table. "I'm going to strike a deal with you, detector," he said. "You're being very tight-lipped about this curse Inuyasha is under, but that's fine, you will come to trust me yet, and I'm going to prove it to you. Hold out your hand."

She hesitated.

He chuckled. "I won't bite it off."

Slowly, she reached her hand out, palm up, her fingers curling open. She tried to calm the small quiver that ran through her and failed. Kouga's fingertips brushed against her palm as he dropped the bundle of jewels in her hand.

Her eyes met his.

"I am giving you back your jewel shards. Think of it as my trust placed in your hands."

Her tongue was thick and heavy in her throat. "But… why?"

"Because we are going to be working together, you and I, to find the rest of them. You may use the jewel to fulfill whatever desires you and the dog wish, but after that I will use it to protect my lands."

Kagome shook her head. "I… can't do that."

"Why not?"

"I…" Well, why  _couldn't_  she do that? What would it matter? Once Inuyasha broke his curse and became full youkai, he certainly wouldn't have any use for it anymore. There were other things that went along with his wishes, like ridding themselves of Kikyou, which she was sure Inuyasha would be able to handle as full youkai, and then of course, getting her family and Sango's brother back…

But was turning down Kouga's offer for help the smartest thing to do? It was hard to think that far ahead when she wasn't even sure if Inuyasha would be returning to normal anytime soon… And yet, the idea struck her as a good one. While Kouga's wolf youkai tribe had almost killed her themselves, now that she was of use to them it was obvious Kouga wouldn't let anything like that happen again. And yeah, Inuyasha was chained and probably feeling a bit tortured, but she couldn't blame the wolves for their actions, knowing what she knew of Inuyasha's history with them.

She couldn't see any other way out of this. And Kouga was staring at her as if he wanted to…  _eat_  her, kind of, but not in the way other youkai did, more in the way  _Inuyasha_  did.

Not good.

Her cheeks burned red, her eyes darting away. Oh god, even the thought of Inuyasha's gaze made her body go crazy. She could practically  _feel_  the change inside her, and by the half-choking sound that emerged between Kouga's lips - he could sense it too.

_Well, shit._

Kouga shifted. It was subtle, his body leaning forward, his eyes raking over her.

"Hey, wait a second," she started, holding her hands up in between them. She almost jumped from her skin when he wrapped them up in between his own.

"Detector-"

She yanked her hands away from his. "Stop calling me that. My name is Kagome, not-"

"Kagome!" He whipped his hands faster than she could see and wrapped hers up again. "Thank you for giving me your name."

"Yes, but-"

"There is more to my offer. I do not just wish for you to collect the jewel shards for my people and my lands. I also want you in my furs."

It was a few seconds before Kagome realized the choking sounds she heard were coming from her own throat. "Wha- you can't-"

"It's okay, I can smell your lust for me."

"Okay,  _first_  of all,  _gross_ ," she said, yanking her hands away for the second time, "and second of all, don't smell me like that, it's private!"

He frowned, "What's private?"

"Th-th-that!" Her voice raised an octave higher.

He waved her concern away, "Nothing about what your body is going through is private to youkai, Kagome, it's very obvious when females become aroused."

"Stop talking about my arousal."

"So you admit that you're aroused,"

"Not by what you think I am!" she scoffed.

"What, then?"

No way. No way would she say it. "Nothing! I'm not aroused, would you drop it already?"

"As you wish, but know that I don't just want you because of your ability to collect the jewel shards, as Inuyasha does. I also know of your strength and ability with a bow. You downed many of my men. You are fierce."

She jerked back. "What, it's okay if I kill your people, but not Inuyasha?"

"You have not rampaged through our village over all these years. For this battle, we attacked you first, and you were simply protecting yourself and the dog. I cannot fault you for such a thing. I would have done the same in your situation. It's one of the many reasons why you would be excellent at my side."

Oh god, her cheeks would  _not_  stop burning, they lit her face on fire, and she pressed her palms to her skin to cool them down. "I can't accept anything like that, Kouga. I don't want to be with someone I don't love."

"You will come to love me." His words left no room for anything but his own confidence.

"I won't," she said, her heart squeezing in her chest.

For a moment he said nothing, and when he sighed it was heavy and deep. "We'll have to wait and see, then. You don't have to answer me right away, but know that my offer stands. I've given you back your jewel shards. Please take it as a sign that I wish to work with you, not against you." He stood from his seat and reached out towards her, another invitation to take his hand. "Come on, let's get you back to your room. Daybreak will be here soon."

.

.

Dawn rose bit by bit, creeping over the horizon, the first rays sliced to ribbons between the mountain peaks, casting a dusted, golden glow across the valley below. On the mesa, Kagome sat with legs tucked under as Kouga did. Ikue had been sent to her room, not Maho, thank god, because she still wanted nothing more than to slap the little thief across her pretty, perfect face.

Ikue had worked quietly, dressing her in dark blue, draping robes, piling her hair on top of her head and pinning into place with the same style of carved bone the female youkai wore. The billowy dress was tied and looped around her shoulders and waist, all held together with a thin, golden rope, tied in the back.

And now here she was, sitting on a pelt set to Kouga's right especially for her. Her clothing matched his in color, as did it match the other youkai who sat spread out in front of them. They all faced a large pyre, which had been stacked together with wood collected and constructed before dawn.

The wolf youkai who did not sit among them instead walked in a flowing, twisting line, each carrying bodies of their slain brethren, both youkai and their animal counterparts. The line of the dead slowly crept up towards the pyre, each body placed carefully on the raised platform, each given a modest offering of food and forest. Kagome kept her questions to herself as she watched them light the pyre, and thick, black smoke rose from the wood, engulfing the bodies.

The howling began as a rumble deep in the throat of each wolf, tails limp and still, ears flattened back. It grew in crescendo until the deep, sobering cry filled her ears. The youkai sitting around her began to rock in rhythm, arms raising to the sky as they joined the howling with a vocalized hum.

As the sky lit up, the humming intensified, as did the rocking, until it became a seated dance. Kagome glanced up at Kouga, whose body also followed the swaying. Tears spilled from his eyes, his gaze locked steady at the burning bodies as their ashes rose to the sky and fell down around them.

Mesmerized by the singular entity they had become, Kagome couldn't look away. She sat and watched, silent and mute as the wolf youkai around her mourned for their dead.

Dead that she had helped murder.

In what seemed like forever, and yet no time at all, the howling died down, the humming and rocking decreased, and left behind was nothing but mourning, achingly painful cries as the pyre collapsed in on itself.

Kouga glanced her way, his eyes widening slightly. He shook his head. "Again, you cry for my people."

She hadn't realized it, but at Kouga's words she brought her hand up to her face. They came away wet with her own tears.

"Now you have seen us as we are, Kagome. We are youkai, not human, but you are strong and useful. There is a place for you here, and I aim to see that you take it."

Over the past few hours Kagome had gotten a glimpse of Kouga she wouldn't have thought existed from the raging battle he'd fought against Inuyasha… and as hard as she might, she just didn't…  _feel_  like he was, well, evil. Or at least, that he had some sort of sinister plan that he was hiding.

How could someone like Kouga be evil, who so easily cried over the death of his own?

His words calmed her, and it was frustrating that she would have to disappoint him in the end, especially since he'd done his best to treat her so well.

It was hard to remember she'd thought only a few hours ago that he could hurt her. If he'd wanted to harm her, he would have chained her up like he had Inuyasha. He'd have eaten her by now. He'd have thrown her to the wolves. She reached into the folds of her ceremonial robes to feel the small pack of jewel shards he had handed over to her.

 _Why… Why would he do such a thing, unless he were sincere?_  She thought, moving the cloth bundle around with her fingertips. She glanced up at him again, but he hadn't waited for a reply from her. His attention was on one of his attendants, and he was nodding and speaking in solemn tones.

The youkai and wolves who had been sitting only moments before were now up and mingling, and it was hard not to notice the looks they sent her way. Kagome's eyes darted to her lap, trying to ignore the whispers that circled around her.

"Kagome, come," Kouga called to her, and willing to do anything to stop focusing on the glares and comments under-breath, Kagome stood and moved to him.

"This is Ginta, my attendant," he introduced.

Ginta was smaller than Kouga; he was lean and lanky while Kouga was tall and broad at the shoulders. His similar, yellow eyes regarded her thoughtfully, if not a bit wearily, and his thick hair grew tight and course from his scalp. Despite his young appearance, his hair was a light grey color, except for the shock of deep grey at the front of his hairline.

He dipped his head.

"He's going to take you to see your dog as you wished."

 _He's not 'my dog',_  Kagome thought, but it was better not to say it out loud. At least not yet. "Thank you," was all she settled for. She wanted to talk to Kouga more about the ceremony, but she wasn't going to miss her first chance of seeing Inuyasha for anything. So she stepped in behind Ginta as he motioned for her to follow him.

Down the winding tunnels they went, Kagome's heart thudding in her chest. Why was she so nervous? Sure, Inuyasha wasn't the same, but still… maybe if she could talk to him alone they could find a way to escape with his life? While Kouga was okay with working together with her, she doubted he would be okay working with Inuyasha, especially as he was now.

Maybe he'd return to his former self quickly?

If the light hit him, and he returned to the mirror, would he change back into who he was? Would he be the same Inuyasha she'd come to know so well?

The thoughts swirled around in her head as Ginta stopped in front of the cave. She could hear Inuyasha inside. His breath was heavy and wet, as if he'd just come up for air. She stepped forward to peek in, but Ginta blocked her way.

"There are a few rules Kouga would like you to abide by when speaking to the dog," he said.

Kagome clenched her jaw. "Oh yeah? Like what?"

"First, you are not to release him. Know that we're poised to attack until he is dead if he is freed. Kouga cannot guarantee your safety if this happens. Second, you are not to speak to him of the jewel shards Kouga has on him. You may discuss the jewel shards you possess as you wish. Third, you are not to touch him."

"But I-"

"Do not touch him. This is not because we worry that it will help the dog. Kouga does not wish to see you hurt. The dog will hurt you."

She couldn't stand it anymore. "His name is Inuyasha, and he won't hurt me."

Ginta raised his hands up. "These are instructions directly from Kouga. While you are a guest in our home we wish you to follow our rules."

"I'm a guest?"

"He gave you back your shards, didn't he?"

She unconsciously reached into the makeshift pocket and felt them between her fingers.

"You can have as long as you'd like, but please keep in mind that Kouga would like to show you around Wolf Territory today." With that, Ginta turned and walked a few feet away before leaning up against the wall.

Kagome watched him for a few moments, but he didn't budge. Of course he didn't. Kouga was nice enough, and maybe a little eager to please, but he wasn't stupid. He wouldn't let Kagome and Inuyasha have privacy to talk without a listening ear.

It couldn't be helped. She turned to the entrance and stepped inside.

 


	47. Split Flesh

 Kagome

A torch had been lit on the inside, the orange hue casting deep shadows in the back of the cave. Kagome stepped further inside, letting the covering fall back against the entrance, giving them the illusion of privacy.

He was right where she'd left him, arms and legs tethered and pulled apart so he couldn't curl up in on himself. Gravity had taken its toll, and he was now slumped forward as much as his restraints would allow. His hair fell around his shoulders and ears, covering his face. She could barely see his nose. Sweat pooled at the tip and a sharp  _plip, plip, plip_  echoed off the walls as the liquid smattered against the floor at his feet.

His breathing was definitely wet. Each inhale was a shutter, each exhale pressed forcefully through his teeth. His shoulders, rounded with the weight of his head, rose and fell as he sucked in the air around him.

"Inu… yasha?" Kagome asked, taking another step forward. She instinctively reached out her hand to push his hair back, but froze as Ginta's words ran through her head.

" _Do not touch him. This is not because we worry that it will help the dog. Kouga does not wish to see you hurt. The dog will hurt you."_

She was still unconvinced.  _He won't hurt me_ , she repeated to herself, the same words she'd so confidently spat back at Ginta. However, she was still unaccustomed to Inuyasha's full youkai.  _Would_  he hurt her? Was it possible, after everything they'd been through so far? Could the same man who had jumped off a cliff to save her life without even thinking about it turn around and harm her?

 _He's not_   _the same man, idiot_.

Still...  _Still_.

She brushed her fingers against his hair. It was just as silky, thick and soft as she remembered. Carefully she pushed it back over his shoulder. He didn't seem to notice that she was there. He stayed still, save for the steady rhythm of his breath forcing his shoulders up and down.

"Inuyasha, can you hear me?" She swept her fingers against the side of his cheek, tracing the striking, dark line that ran across his skin with the pad of her thumb. He was warm to the touch. Warmer than he usually was. Her fingers felt like ice compared to him.

"Do you have a fever?" she murmured. She stepped closer, so she could see his face through the hair that fell around it, and moved her hand to his forehead to push his bangs from his face.

He jerked back, the chains binding him into place yanking violently at their anchor points. A squeal of terror ripped from Kagome as she shuffled backwards, her hand gripping at her chest to slow her beating heart. Inuyasha's wild eyes met hers. They were still the deep, dark red where clean white should have been.

" **You,"**  he snarled, his hands fisting in his chains, " **your scent…"**

She was suddenly back in Sango's kitchen, her body splayed over Inuyasha's, protecting him from Sango after she'd doused him with youkai poison.

" _You… smell good,"_  he'd said. " _Like vanilla and cherry blossoms."_

Was he going to say it again? Were his memories the same as his hanyou side? Could he hear her heart beating the same, irregular pattern as it had back then?

" **You stink of wolf,"**  he spat, brows drawn together and nose wrinkled in disgust.

...Okay. Kagome stood straight and crossed her arms over her chest. "Really? Because the wolves keep telling me I stink of dog. I wonder which of you is wrong."

Inuyasha inhaled, his breath rattling in his lungs. Kagome's lips pulled down at the sound of it. ...That couldn't be good.

" **What are you waiting for, woman? Release me. It fucking hurts."**

"Inuyasha…" she started.

" **I demand my release."**

"I don't even know how to-"

He lunged for her, hands fisted. Twisting back and forth, he opened his mouth and his rage reverberated against the rocks that surrounded them. Kagome clamped her hands down over her ears, turning away from his madness.

When she turned back, he had exhausted himself. His head hung forward again, as if he were bowing to her, his fingers limp as the metal cuffs dug into his wrists. His fire rat coat had fallen off his shoulders, showing his bloodstained, white tee. Kagome's eyes widened as she saw it was ripped to shreds across his back.

"What…?" she asked, taking a cautious step forward. When he didn't move, she grew bolder and took a few more steps. As she got closer, she realized it was true: deep, dark, bloody gashes decorated his skin. They were open and oozing. They looked fresh, as if he'd been beaten only moments ago.

"No," she breathed, reaching out and gripping onto the red fabric. She pulled it down as best she could. How was it possible? His fire rat coat should have protected him against such wounds. She could see them, they split his back open, running down further than they should have been able to.

She fisted the collar of the fire rat coat in her hand, and it trembled along with her. "What did they do, Inuyasha?" she asked.

His only reply was the same ragged, wet breathing.

"Inuyasha,  _what did they do to you_?" she asked again, her voice rising with her anger. "What the hell did Kouga do to you?"

His head lifted. He was trying to say something, but she couldn't hear, so she leaned over to watch his lips. She couldn't make him out before his teeth ground together and he started to shake. The veins in his neck popped out and his fists clenched again. Pain. He was in pain.

She heard it then: like soaked flesh tearing in two. She whipped her head back to look under his fire rat coat and let out a horrified gasp as she watched his back split apart. Blood oozed from the wound as it moved, as if by  _magic_ , tearing across his ribcage.

"How…?" she breathed, horrified.

" **Keh,"**  he sighed, so much like he did when he was his normal self, " **did you think the wolves would simply imprison me?"**

"I didn't think…. never  _this_ …" she couldn't choke the full sentence out of her mouth, her thoughts tumbling ferociously in her head:  _No way. No way._

And yet, it  _was._  Frantic, she reached up to his shackles and pulled. She gripped his metal bindings and yanked as hard as she could, again and again until her fingertips turned red. Screaming, she tried to force her powers into her chest, her eyes squeezed shut, her mouth open in a sharp cry as she mustered everything she could with all her strength.

They didn't budge.

" **I sit here, tortured and slowly decaying while what-is-mine does nothing."**

"What do you call this?" she shouted, giving one last yank on the chains. "I'm trying to break you out!"

" **Why not use your powers, priestess,"**  he sneered.

She bit her lip against the string of curses she wanted to let fly. "They won't come," she said instead.

" **Is that why what-is-mine lays in the furs of the Wolf King?"**

Kagome let out a frustrated groan and stepped back away from him. "I haven't laid in anyone's furs. Don't make it sound like I've abandoned you!"

" **Then free me."**

"I can't. I don't know how." She took another step back and rubbed at her face with her hands. She could feel him staring at her, and she glanced up at him through her fingers. "What?"

" **You look like one of them."**

"I look like myself," she snapped.

He chuckled, long and low. " **You look like a wolf bitch and you have the smell of a female begging to be claimed. I must admit I'm curious why he has not taken claim as his."**  He spat at the ground, stark red against the pale dirt. " **I should have claimed it when I had the chance. Nevermind the wolves that surrounded me."**

"Would you stop talking about claiming me? I won't be claimed. Kouga cannot claim me,  _you_  cannot claim me. So just drop it already and turn back to how you usually are."

" **I will not."**

" _Why_? They'll release you if you turn back! Kouga has said so himself!"

" **I am finally free from both my mirror and my human half. I will not willingly step back into my cages."**

"You idiot, you're not free from anything! You're still trapped to the mirror, you just haven't been inside it for a while - thanks to  _me_. And don't think I'll help you like you are now. The only way to get out of this mess is to let Inuyasha back out!"

" **Foolish woman, the wolf will not let me free no matter what form I take. He will torture me until I die. You think he is true to his word?"**  He straightened out slowly, wincing and hissing through his teeth as he moved.

Kagome held back the urge to touch him again. She wanted to let him know, the him inside, that he wouldn't have to be in pain much longer if she had anything to do with it.

But his eyes were hard and chilling, and standing tall, he towered over her. " **Ask yourself, why did he bring you here? To dangle what-is-mine in front of my face. To show that he has what-is-mine and will do what he will with it."**

"I'm not an  _it_. I belong to no one."

" **You belong to me."**

"I don't, you arrogant-" she paused and inhaled deep, calming herself. "You are not the same Inuyasha. He's who I fell in love with,  _not_  you."

" **You do not know me, then. You think we are separate? That we are not one in the same? There is no Inuyasha without me. Even if you succeed in drawing the hanyou to the surface, I will always be there, inside him, whispering to him - my thoughts, my actions, my entire being is Inuyasha!"**

"Stop talking, just -  _shut up!_ " she stomped her foot on the ground, her hands fisting at her sides. "If the Inuyasha that I know is still in there anywhere, then he knows that I'm not leaving him to rot inside of you." Her eyes came up to lock onto his, and for the first time since encountering the wolves, her plan was solidified. Inuyasha's youkai wouldn't help her? Fine. Screw him. She would force the hanyou back. She would force Inuyasha back to himself. "I'll get the mirror and I will  _make_  you get inside. And then I will find a way to change you back."

His lips pulled back to show his teeth. " **This spell will** _ **rip me to slithers**_   **before I willingly step into that prison."**

No more. Talking to Inuyasha as he was now was useless. Kagome stormed from the room and thrust aside the hanging pelt. Ginta was in the same spot, looking bored. He turned to her as she stomped towards him.

"You didn't follow the rules," he said. "Kouga won't be happy."

"I don't care about your stupid rules, and I could give a fuck about whether Kouga is happy or not. Take me to him," she demanded. " _Now_."

.

.

Ginta didn't say much as he led her down the tunnels to Kouga's chambers, but Kagome had to give it to him - he didn't dawdle. Anger stewed inside her as they neared, and she pushed past him and swept aside the pelt, ignoring Ginta's protests about formality or whatever - she didn't care at this point about showing Kouga any sort of respect. Not when he was torturing Inuyasha and hiding it from her!

"Hey!" she called out, making a beeline for him. He was sitting at one of the larger tables that circled the fire pit, talking with another youkai. This one wore the same attire Ginta did. Another attendant? He had a blonde, spiky mohawk, which under any other circumstance Kagome might have stopped and stared. But her anger boiled over. She was seeing red. And Kouga was her target.

"Kagome!" Kouga said, as if he were pleasantly surprised to see her. As if he wasn't aware that he was torturing her friend. "I'm glad to see you again so soon. Were you able to talk to your dog?"

"Stop calling him dog, his name is Inuyasha. And how  _dare_  you!" she seethed.

"Ginta, you're supposed to be watching her," the mohawk youkai snapped as Ginta came up behind her.

"She surprised me, Hakkaku, I thought she knew better. I forgot that humans have no respect."

"Fuck you, I have respect!" Kagome spat.

Hakkaku snarled in her direction. "Human-" he started.

"Enough," Kouga demanded, his hand out in front of his attendant. "Ginta, Hakkaku, leave us."

"But Kouga…" Hakkaku said, eyes narrowing in Kagome's direction.

"You don't think I can handle myself in front of a human? Out."

Looking slightly dejected, Hakkaku and Ginta retreated. Kagome fisted her hands. Now wasn't the time to get nervous. Kouga wouldn't hurt her. He knew what she could do, and he wasn't about to lose her ability. It was the only leverage she had at this point.

"Now, what's this about?" he asked, voice gentle, as if calming a child.

"You know what this is about, you jerk! What, did you think I wouldn't notice that that stupid binding spell you have him under is literally ripping him apart? Do you think I'm fucking stupid?"

He motioned towards the table he had been sitting at previously. "Please, sit."

"Fuck you, I'll stand."

He sighed. "Fine. No, I don't think you're stupid."

"Then why didn't you tell me it was slicing him open! He's lost a shit ton of blood already. It doesn't matter if he's youkai or not, he'll bleed to death!"

Kouga's mouth pressed into a firm line. "Kagome, I was not aware at first that the spell would injure him like that. It wasn't until after our talk last night that it was made known to me."

"You should have told me as  _soon_  as you found out about it."

He frowned. "I had a lot to deal with. The ceremony for my people couldn't be taken lightly. That came first."

"So now the ceremony is over. What are you going to do about it?"

His eyes narrowed. "I'm not going to do anything about it. There's nothing I can do at the moment."

"You can free him!"

His lip pulled back. "I won't. Not while he is full youkai and a danger to my people."

"You're torturing him!" she cried. "And don't think for a second that I'll help you with  _anything_." She turned to leave. She needed to get back to Inuyasha, to figure out some way to free him. If Kouga wouldn't help her, she would die trying to get him out.

Kouga grabbed onto her arm, holding her in place. "Kagome, the torture was not intentional, I need you to believe me. But you also have to understand my position as King. I cannot put my people at risk again."

She stopped struggling against his grip, feeling helpless. When she didn't reply he continued.

"I've given you back your shards and explained that I'm willing to work together. But I need you to work with me as well. I can't let him free as he is now, but if he were to return to his hanyou form…"

She whipped her head around, eyes wide. "That's it?"

"That's it."

Kagome bit her lip, her thoughts racing. If she could get back to the mirror and bring it back to Inuyasha… well,  _maybe_  the mirror spell would cause him to change back? It was worth a shot. She turned to him and he released her arm, taking a step back to give her some room. She rubbed at the spot where he grabbed, although it didn't really hurt. He hadn't gripped her  _that_  hard.

"There might be a way that I know of…" she said, her voice trailing off. She was hesitant to give him too much information, worried he might use it against Inuyasha.

His eyebrow raised. "There is?"

She nodded, slowly. "When your wolves attacked, I-  _we_  left our stuff behind in the cave. I need to get my stuff. Hopefully it's still there."

"My people brought nothing back to me. It must still be there." He nodded, as if confirming to himself that it was the right thing to do. "I'll escort you myself to ensure your protection."

.

.

Kagome was ready to go  _now_ , but Kouga took his time. A meeting was called with his close attendants, and Kagome didn't miss the narrowed glares Ginta and Hakkaku sent her way in passing as she left his chambers. She waited eagerly outside the entrance, her thoughts buzzing around inside her head.

This could be it. Getting Inuyasha back to himself and freeing him of his second entrapment. She prayed to whoever was listening at that it would work.

It seemed like forever before Kouga finally emerged. His eyes found hers before he jerked his chin, a sign to follow him. Ginta and Hakkaku were nowhere to be seen.

She shadowed him through the tunnels and out into the sunlight. The air seemed colder, and she wrapped herself up tighter in her robes, rubbing her arms underneath the fabric. She could almost make out her breath in the air.

"We can use the time to show you around my territory," Kouga said as they walked towards the edge.

Kagome stopped at his side and looked down off the mesa. There was no way for her to effectively get down, no stairs or sloping decline. Just a drop. She opened her mouth to ask where she could go, but Kouga moved, too fast for her to see and swept her up into his arms.

"Hey, wha-" she cried.

"It's okay, I've got you," he said, and she could practically feel the pride oozing from his words.

But those words… those words…

" _I've got you," Inuyasha whispered in her ear as they fell to the earth, "I-"_

She started to struggle out of Kouga's arms, but quickly ditched that idea as he leapt off the mesa, choosing instead to wrap her arms tightly around his neck as they dropped to the forest floor below.

It was different from being carried by Inuyasha. She had one-hundred-percent of her trust placed in him, but who knew if Kouga would drop her? It would certainly solve a lot of his problems.

 _The jewel_ , she breathed to herself,  _he needs me alive to find the rest of the jewel!_

The landing was so soft, she didn't realize they'd stopped falling for a moment. Not until Kouga chuckled and nuzzled the top of her head with his nose.

"Hey!" she cried again, untangling her arms and pushing at his chest. "What are you doing?"

He pushed his bottom lip out. "You were holding me so tight, I couldn't help it."

"Well, stop it. Let me down."

He sighed, but released her. "It's only a matter of time, Kagome."

"Until what?" she asked, dragging her hands through her hair to tame the wind-blown stays.

She felt his breath on her ear. "Until I'm the man you come running to, instead of your dog."

Color flooded her cheeks and reached out and pushed him back. "Keep your distance. I like my dog just fine," she mumbled.

He chuckled in reply. "I'll leave it for now," he said.

The ensuring walk was peaceful, and it was somewhat interesting to see the mini caves carved into the slope that served as homes for the extensive wolf pack. They peeked and prodded their noses in her and Kouga's direction, heads tilting and sniffing the air curiously. Every so often one would whine and leap at Kouga, and he would laugh and wrestle around a bit before they moved on.

...It was sweet, although the thought of Inuyasha still tied up and tortured dampened the wholesomeness of it a bit.

The forest surrounding the mesa looked starkly different in the daytime than it had the night Kagome had been chased by the wolves. Still, every so often she got a flash of deja vu, and she would break out in a sweat despite the brisk air that swept across her skin. They approached a clearing that Kagome couldn't tell if she recognized or not, and again, the eerie sense that she'd been there before fell upon her.

Beside her, Kouga sniffed the air. "We've got company," he said, then turned to point out another small cavern off to the left. But Kagome was curious about the company he mentioned. She peered through the tree to see a group of youkai huddled together. Oh, that's what he meant. She could hear them laughing, mixed in with a high pitched squealing that grated in on her nerves.

"What are they doing?" she asked, pointing in their direction.

"Hmm," Kouga said absentmindedly, "looks like the fox pup is back."

Her breath escaped from her lugs. "The fox pup… you mean Shippou?"

He shrugged, "I don't know its name."

"Hey, they're hurting him."

"Let them play with him, he's only a fox."

"Kouga, that's sick!" She broke away from him and ran towards the group. There were seven or eight of them, male and female, all huddled around… yeah, it was definitely Shippou. She could see a flash of his copper hair and a bulbous yellow backpack.  _Her_  backpack.

Kouga had caught up and was easily trodding along beside her. He took a few more quick steps and turned, walking backwards to face her as she jogged. "Wait, what's sick? I don't understand."

"He's just a child!"

His nose wrinkled. "Yeah, but it's a fox."

Kagome reached out to push him to the side. "You think youkai are so much better than humans, but you treat each other like shit. Shippou!" she called, picking up her pace as she neared the group.

"Wah! Kagome!" his voice warbled out from between two youkai holding him to the ground. Another was opening her bag and going digging through her stuff. A third had picked up Inuyasha's mirror and was turning it this way and that, catching her image as well as her friends.

"It knows you?" she heard Kouga ask from behind.

"Hey, get away from him!" she shouted, pushing through the group and falling to her knees in front of Shippou. He was disheveled and dirty, his hair matted with dirt and sticks and leaves. His shirt was torn. The two youkai who held him down snarled at her, and for a moment she thought they might attack, but Kouga snapped his teeth, his snarl causing them to jump back and away from Kagome.

"Do as she says," he ordered.

Shippou started to cry. Big, fat tears slid down his little cheeks as Kagome gathered him up in her arms and held him to her chest. His tears soaked the cloth of her robe as she rocked him slowly.

"It's okay," she whispered, brushing his hair with her hands. He trembled in her grasp.

"I-I thought you died!"

"Hey, now… you know I can't die. Inuyasha is strong, remember? He wouldn't let me die."

"Th-there was so much blood and the wolves were e-everywhere and I kept losing your scent!"

"Oh, Shippou," she said as her own tears welled up in her eyes, "I'm so sorry."

"And your backpack is heavy!" he wailed, his little fists clenching onto her robe.

She couldn't help the chuckle that escaped between her lips. "I know, I'm sorry, it really is heavy! But you were so brave, bringing me my backpack!"  _And Inuyasha's mirror!_  she added with relief.

"I-I am brave," he hiccupped.

"You're the bravest."

"Kagome…" Kouga interrupted, his voice filled with hesitation, "I was unaware you knew the fox pup."

She jerked her head around to glare at him. "Well I do, and don't think I don't know how awful you've been treating him, either!"

"Well-" he started, sheepishly.

"I swear, it's like the more I find out about you, the worse it gets," she spat, her anger bubbling over.

"But Kagome, youkai have-"

"Just leave us alone, Kouga."

He huffed but stayed put. "You know I can't do that."

"Give us some space, at least! He's terrified!"

After a moment he sighed and snapped his fingers. The youkai ruffling through her bag stood and backed away, the one holding the mirror gently placed it on the ground. Narrowed, yellow eyes stayed on her as they dissipated, grumbling about humans and how  _dare_  she speak to Kouga like that?

"I'll be over there," Kouga finally replied, pointing to where they'd been walking along the path. "Take your time and when you're ready, I'll bring you back to your room."

"Shippou's coming with me."

He opened his mouth the argue, but snapped it shut when Kagome scowled at him. She turned back to Shippou, listening to Kouga's footsteps as he moved away.

"Better now, right?"

Shippou nodded, eyes wide. He wiped at his face, and peeked over her shoulder. "Kagome, that's the wolf king!"

"I know," she sighed.

His nose wrinkled. "You smell like him."

"Not you too," she mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"But where's Inuyasha?" At her hesitation, he cocked his head to the side. "Did he leave you here? Is that why you smell like Kouga? Are you Kouga's mate now?"

Kagome choked on her words.

Shippou dropped his chin to his chest. "Aw, and after I brought his mirror back and everything."

She cleared her throat. "Inuyasha is here, Shippou. He's just… inside," she said, lamely.

He wiggled free of her arms, a burst of excitement seemingly out of nowhere. "I  _was_  brave, Kagome, and I cried a lot when I saw all of Inuyasha's blood and I thought you died and he died, but I still followed the trail back here and I kept hoping that maybe you would be here, but then the wolves found me and I thought they were going to take all your stuff and steal all the food you have in your backpack. That's why I fought back!"

Kagome's heart ached in her chest. It was so good to have Shippou back, to hear his chatter. She almost felt like she was back in the cave they'd been holed up in, listening to him babble away as she made dinner or gathered firewood.

But there wasn't time to fall back into the good times. Shippou had, unknowingly, given her a new hope that she hadn't thought possible only moments ago. She now had Inuyasha's mirror. She now had her belongings. She now had a plan.

"Shippou," she said, reaching out and brushing his hair back from his face, "you look dirty and tired. Let's get you a warm bath, okay?"

His nose wrinkled again. "No, I don't like to bathe."

"I have a really nice pool in my room!" she said, trying to make it sound as exciting as she possibly could. "And we can play some games afterwards!"

His lip jutted out. "What if the wolves are mean to me again?"

"They won't be, I promise. I won't let them."

"Yeah, but how?"

"Because they do what I say, Shippou. I stopped Inuyasha from being mean to you, right?"

He nodded, "Oh yeah cause you were Inuyasha's mate, but now you're Kouga's mate so the wolves won't bother me if you say so."

"No, Shippou, I-"

"Humans are weird, youkai only have one mate."

"I'm not…" she trailed off, thinking better of it, "we'll talk about it later. Can you make it inside with me?" She stood and re-packed the items that had been pulled out of her sack. "I'll carry this, you've come so far with all this stuff!"

"Okay!" he said, vibrating with excitement. He jumped up into her arms, and together they made their way towards Kouga.

 


	48. Refusal

Inuyasha

In and out again.

In and out.

His consciousness came and went; a hazy blanket suffocating him, only waking once the pain befell him.

It unfurled inside him, the pain. It spread through his veins like liquid fire. Every molecule. Every nerve. It pressed around him, squeezing his insides, forcing wetness into his lungs. It became increasingly difficult to breathe.

And then there was the tearing. His skin ripping apart bit by bit, a consistent reminder that he was still trapped. Still imprisoned. And what-was-his was still kept from him.

And worse - far worse than that, she was slowly  _becoming_  them.

Inuyasha could not figure out why the wolf bastard had not yet claimed her. What-was-his was still fire and fury, a rage against those that tried to dominate her. She was ripe and ready, and he knew her secret was just the sort of thing the Wolf King would seek to control.

If there was one thing Inuyasha hated, it was losing that which he knew was already his.

He had watched, only moments ago, as she raged against him, the trail of her fingertips still scorched on his skin, cooling by the second. Eyes lit ablaze, she'd stared him down, unknowingly challenging him for dominance. The image of her under him, writhing with pleasure as he forced her to call his name flashed behind his eyes. He could practically taste her as her words of defiance fell from her lips:

" _If the Inuyasha that I know is still in there anywhere, then he knows that I'm not leaving him to rot inside of you. I'll get the mirror and I will_ make  _you get inside. And then I will find a way to change you back."_

Her challenge was a lit fuse of desire, even through his pain. His hands clenched into fists as his blood rushed below, ready and eager, eyes fastened as she turned and stormed from the room.

This woman was his only chance of escape. He had achieved it before, an escape via convincing her to kiss him free. Was it now simply a matter of convincing her once more to free him by way of deception? Could he persuade her to release him while still in his youkai form?

The thought tumbled in his head, and a plan formed as he felt his back rip open a fresh wound. The pain started anew, and slowly he succumbed to unconsciousness.

.

.

"Inuyasha… can you hear me?"

Her touch lit him on fire. It burned, painfully, but he leaned into it as his eyes opened, as his vision swam.

It was harder to breathe.

"Hey, I've got it. I've got your mirror," she said, brushing his hair back.

"Kagome,  _do not touch him_ ," the wolf growled.

Slowly, Inuyasha's thoughts came back to him. His female was bent over at the waist, peering at him with wide, concerned eyes. Her hand gripped the top of his cursed mirror, the bottom pressed against the floor. His eyes swept across the glass, taking the image of himself in for the first time in a long time.

Pale, sickly skin, wet and dripping with sweat. Drowned, tangled hair and a blood-soaked white tee crusted and hanging from his shoulders. If only the wretched spell were lifted, if only his hands were free to do his bidding, he could slaughter the wolf and take his female and be done with it.

Yet any attempt at this moment would do him no good. He would have to bide his time and take every advantage he had. So for now, he kept silent.

"Inuyasha, can you hear me?" his female asked.

He responded by lifting his head towards her voice. He could make both she and his enemy out in the room. The cur stood behind her, his hand on her forearm. He watched as she pulled away from him and re-adjusted her robes, watched and kept silent, even though the image of the wolf touching her burned hot inside him.

"Kagome…" the wolf spoke, voice weak with worry.

"I don't need your help," she said before returning her gaze to where it should always be. "Inuyasha, you have to get into the mirror now."

Inhaling and exhaling as best he could, Inuyasha straightened out, just enough to release his shoulders of their strain, it was a struggle, but he would not allow the wolf to see how much it pained him.

" **I've said it before. I will not."**

"Kouga promised to release you if you get in the mirror."

" **...No."**

The Wolf King crossed his arms behind her. "Dog, you are more of a fool than I thought."

Inuyasha's eyes shifted to him, even as a new wound opened fresh across his back. " **Not so foolish to know you will be killing me either way,"**  he spat, ignoring his wound.

"I don't have time for this, I-"

"Kouga," a guard entered the room, "the sisters need you, a fight broke out and one has challenged the other."

The wolf snorted, "I'm in the middle of something, Ginta,"

"Yes sir, but the fight has left Dai severely injured and her mate is on the warpath…"

He grunted, irritated, before turning to Kagome. "I must leave you for a moment. Do. Not. Touch him."

She nodded, and with another challenging glance Inuyasha's way, the wolf left the room.

It was now, or it never would be. Inuyasha turned to pin his gaze on What-Was-His.

" **Listen to me, woman. The spell is suppressing my hanyou form. I cannot release it while being subdued. I must be freed first."**

Her eyebrow raised. "Do you think I'm stupid?"

" **It does not matter if you are dimwitted or not, I tell you the truth."**

"Inuyasha, I don't know how to free you even if I could. We've been over this before."

" **All you must do is find out. You must get the information from the wolf."**

"Kouga's not going to tell me how to free you either, you have a history of murdering his people."

He couldn't help but smirk. " **I cannot lie and say I do not enjoy a good wolf-slaughter, but I was not of my own will at the time."**

"Yeah, I realize that, but it won't convince him to free you. Not while we're surrounded by innocent wolves."

He huffed, " **Innocent."**

"Now," she ignored him, pushing his mirror closer, "get in."

His lip pulled back into a snarl. How dare she? " **Foolish woman, you will demand nothing from me."**

"Get. In."

" **I will never."**

"Get in!" she yelled, and pressed the mirror up against his face, pressed it against his cheek as if she didn't care that he might retaliate for her disrespect and slit her throat.

But then, pain! His back began to tear again, he felt it ripping open as the pain slammed into him anew. He threw his head back and let out an agonizing hiss.

"Inuyasha!" she cried, letting the mirror drop flat on the ground as she reached out to him, stopping only millimeters short. "Is it happening again? What can I do? What can I do to help with the pain?"

" **Woman,"**  he cursed, panting, " **there's nothing that can be done but setting me free."**

She shook her head in response, her eyes filling with her weak, human tears. "No, I need to help, I need… I need  _you_ ," she said, voice cracking. She moved closer, her forehead pressed to his, her hands around the back of his neck. "Don't you remember?" she asked, eyes pleading. "Don't you remember any of it? Any of  _me?_ " Her bottom lip trembled.

Her scent filled his nose, now that she was so close. How was it that it overpowered the scent of his enemy that surrounded her? Why was it that she smelled so sweet, despite being covered by the wolf?

She was mumbling his name, her lids fluttering closed. "Come back to me," she whispered. "Please?"

At her mercy, weak and pathetic and soft like everything he despised, she kissed him. Her lips were warm against his, soft and supple. And sweet. Sweeter than fruit nectar, sweeter than he could remember as a hanyou. Her hands held him in place, as firm and strong as possible for her, a juxtaposition to her lips.

Heat pulsated through him, a warmth that seemed to come from inside her, a warmth that he drank eagerly.

"Inuyasha, come back to me," she whimpered, a call to his other half. But his hanyou was buried deep inside, and Inuyasha had what-was-his…  _ **Mine**_ … to himself, and he wanted nothing more than to grab her by the hair and press her cheek into the dirt and nestle in behind her. Press himself into her and remind her  _why_  she was his.

Her touch caused his pain to subside. There was something he couldn't place that he drew from within her. He hardened for her, his hands fisting with the need to touch her, to press into her, to fill her just as the images filled his head. A frustrated whine surfaced from below, the need overwhelming to take and truly claim her so no one would be able to dispute it.

Again, his name fell from her lips, and she kissed him, and -  _ **damn these tethered hands**_  - she was stepping closer, pressing herself to him. She called his name. Again and again. Her urgency accelerated and she whimpered before she was yanked from him.

" _Kagome!_ " the wolf hissed, his hand around her arm, pushing her behind him.

"Wait," she gasped, breathless.

Rage built up inside Inuyasha. He grabbed at the chains that held him, pulling with all his might, as his anger overtook him, growling and snapping at the wolf, thrashing back and forth despite the tearing of his flesh.

"I told you not to touch him," the Wolf King berated, giving her a shake.

Inuyasha's breath was pushed from him. It was like putrid sick, rising up inside him, a second consciousness shoving at his very own for control. His vision swam against the second, new form of pain, one he didn't recognize. One that did not come from the spell.

Inuyasha, as a full youkai, never once had to deal with his hanyou-self. It stayed asleep inside him, knowing its place. So what was it now that caused it to rear up against him? How dare it demand anything?

_Don't let that fucking bastard touch her! Let me out!_

Shocked into stillness, Inuyasha froze. He could no longer focus on the sight of what-was-his arguing with the wolf. His attention was inward, his rage turned on himself.  _ **Stay silent, fool,**_  he hissed to his hanyou,  _ **you will ruin everything.**_

 _Just let me_ speak  _to her, I can convince her to free us and get her away from the wolf!_

_**If I was to allow such a thing, you will not give me control back.** _

_That's not true, I'm collecting the jewel so we can be stronger! No more fighting our separate consciousness, no more separating ourselves, we will be one!_

_**You have spent centuries hiding me away, shoving me back into nothingness. Do not think for a second that I will readily allow you to come forth and control me once more. No, I will convince the wench myself.**_  He shoved his hanyou back, pressed forcefully against him, beating it into submission as he watched the wolf remove what-was-his from the room. Slowly the inner sickness subsided, and his attention returned to his surroundings.

The urge to chase after them would not come to fruition now, but it did not matter. What-was-his had tasted him once more. Her desire could not have been more clear. She would do what he asked. She would learn how to free him and he would take her away from the wolves, and he would claim her as his. And then his true plan for carving out his own territory would begin.

Afterall, it had been kept from him after all this time, the land that was truly his own.

And when what-was-his became too old and decrepit and useless to him, he would kill her and find a new mate. One whose body could stand against the ruthlessness of time. He could not help who his youkai was drawn to, but he would stay far away from humans. A full youkai with a rich bloodline like his own would do far better with a youkai mate.

He pushed back against his hanyou, who, to his surprise, thrashed violently against the thought of murdering the female, but Inuyasha knew what was best. What good would it do to keep her around if she no longer brought her warmth to him? After all, humans aged in the blink of an eye compared to youkai.

.

.

Kagome

His lips were the same, although the large fangs behind them were not. Neither were his eyes. Or his words. But Kagome felt the same warmth pool inside her abdomen, felt herself wetten and swell when she kissed him. The urge to take him inside of her was the same as the first day she met him, even as the monster he'd turned into. Even as he'd changed.

She was numb to the words Kouga lectured her with. She could see his frustration and anger. Although he'd given her a shake earlier, he hadn't hit her, he hadn't called her names, and once he saw that she wasn't reacting to his disapproval, he'd backed off.

Maybe it was the look on her face that had done it? She couldn't tell what she looked like, she'd left Inuyasha's mirror back in his prison, but she felt like the hole in her chest would open up and devour her. She probably looked like shit.

Once Kouga backed off, Kagome was able to convince him to allow Shippou to sleep in her room with her, though it took a while. She had to insist that yes, it was what she  _really_  wanted, and  _yes_ , he was going to be staying with her the whole time she was there, and  _no,_  she didn't need Ikue's help bathing him. She pushed and won, and now sat on the edge of the pool in her room, watching the little fox splash around in the glowing blue water. There was no guard standing outside. There had to be some way that Kouga was keeping an eye on her, but as far as she could tell, she and Shippou were given their privacy.

It would be the slip in observance that Kagome needed to get her and Inuyasha out of this mess. With Kouga refusing to release him from his magical binding, and Kagome's powers still nowhere to be found, it was the one chance she had. Shippou arriving had given her new hope.

He had already gone above and beyond in proving himself to be trustworthy and dependable. Not only had he saved her from the Naraku youkai, what with running to fetch Inuyasha despite his fear, but he'd also not given up on finding them again when they'd been split up. As strange as it was to admit it, Shippou had become a part of her family in such a short time. The thought of leaving him somewhere, either out in the wild to fend for himself or here with the wolves, was impossible.

And yet, she was going to ask him to prove himself once more.

He was laughing as she splashed some water in his face, and he kicked around and floated on his back in the deeper part of the pool. Kagome smiled as he floated towards her. "Shippou, can we talk about something?"

He turned upright and nodded his head.

"You know how the wolves aren't very nice to you?"

He frowned. "Yeah."

"They're not being very nice to Inuyasha either. They won't let him go."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"They're hurting him, and they won't stop hurting him. You know how Inuyasha is a hanyou, right? Well, right now he's a full youkai, like you and Kouga are. And they won't release him while he's the way he is. Do you understand?"

He nodded again, this time slowly. She could practically see his brain processing the information.

"I didn't know what to do until you showed up. Seeing you be so brave makes me brave too! You brought Inuyasha's mirror and my pack. You're my hero." She smiled as he beamed up at her.

"I can do lots of brave things, Kagome!"

She laughed. "Of course you can! And because you're so brave, I need your help again. Do you remember my powers? Yeah? Well, I can't use them right now, and I need you to help me get them back. Do you think you can do that for me?"

His nod was vigorous this time. "I can do anything you need me to do!" he exclaimed, climbing out of the water and onto the floor. He shook the excess water off of himself, much to Kagome's amusement.

She moved to him, sitting back on her haunches so she could speak to him in a low voice. She reached into her robes and pulled out the jewel shards. "I need you to bring these to a friend of mine. She's the one who taught me how to control my powers, and she's the only one I know who might be able to help. I need you to tell her where I am. Tell her that Inuyasha is in trouble. Tell her that I can't get him to change back to hanyou, and the wolves won't let him go, and I need her to help me get my powers back."

His eyes grew as she spoke, wider and wider, and Kagome took her chance at his stillness and reached out for his hand, placing the pocket of jewel shards in his palm.

"Do you think you can sneak out of here tonight? Do you think you can leave without being caught?"

His brows furrowed together, and he nodded. "I can do it."

.

.

Midnight had passed - at least, she thought it had - and Kagome now sat on the floor, her back pressed up against her bed of pelts, her backpack open next to her. The calendar that Kaede had so thoughtfully packed for her was still intact, and she flipped through it now, trying to find the last point where she'd been marking the days off.

Shippou had snuck out hours ago, successfully, she hoped. Her heart ached for the little youkai. For the fact that he was still so eager to help despite how tired he was. For the fact that he was so small and caught up in something so much bigger than he could ever really imagine. And now, without her powers and without the jewel shards, she could do nothing but wait. Wait and hope that somehow, Kaede would be able to help her. She couldn't think of any way such help would be possible, but giving up hope now would be accepting defeat, and while Inuyasha was still alive, she was not defeated.

She was alive, and she was  _not defeated_.

The calendar now lay open in her lap. She had found the last day she marked and counted from there. She counted…

And yes, it was just as she suspected.

Slowly, she leaned forward and poked at the ground near her feet. She dragged her fingertip through the dirt, a crude drawing of a cake, with frosting and candles on top. She drew the little flames, imagining that they flickered to life.

She hadn't noticed that her eyes filled with water. That a tear had escaped and fallen from her lashes, plopping right in the middle of her drawing.

Kagome's special day had now passed, alone and without a friend in sight. As of today, Kagome was eighteen years of age. As of today, Kagome was an adult.

"Happy Birthday to me," she sang, voice wobbling as she allowed her sorrow to take over.


	49. Memories

 

Sango

"You have everything?" Hojou asked, cinching the ties of his bag together and pulling the sliding lock tight.

Sango nodded, zipping her own pack up. She'd gone over her checklist a dozen times at this point. Normally she wasn't so compulsive, but she had to admit to herself that she was afraid. Afraid of what she was going to find  _if_  they managed to catch up to Kagome. She wanted to be prepared for anything, although it was impossible.

"Okay, I'm going to take one last sweep to make sure we didn't forget anything and then we can say our goodbyes."

"Okay," she agreed as he made his way back up the stairs. He passed Kaede on the porch, nodding as he entered the house.

The sun was just coming up over the treetops, and a haze had settled in the clearing. It had rained last night. The grass was wet and the earth gave way under Sango's shoes. The air was heavy with the scent of drenched pine.

Kaede was wrapped up in a warm shawl, an extra shield against the chill of the morning air. She seemed tired to Sango, like she hadn't slept that night. She couldn't blame her; too much had happened over the past few weeks. So many people had been dropped onto her doorstep, no time to do anything but react.

Guilt twisted in Sango's gut, a feeling she was becoming used to. She had softened towards the old woman since they'd had their chat on the porch a week ago, and Sango had come to care for her like a surrogate grandmother. She was sad to leave the old woman on her own again.

"Sango," Kaede said, hobbling down the steps.

Sango reached out to help her down the last few, her hand papery-thin in her own.

"It fills me with happiness that you have recovered so well. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you had more magic healing."

She ignored the words as best she could and kept her face still. She knew Kaede would not approve of the shard in her back. Instead, she nodded. "You've helped me so much, I can't thank you enough."

Kaede patted her hand, the way a grandmother would. "No need to thank me, just use that strength of yours to free your brother. Then rid the world of my sister and let this old woman rest."

Sango couldn't help but grin. "Then you can retire to somewhere warm and tropical!"

"Aye, that would do these bones some good," she cracked a toothy smile.

Hojou returned, taking the steps down two at a time behind them, brushing his fingers through his hair. "I think we're good to go. You ready?"

"As I'll ever be," Sango sighed, releasing Kaede's hand and picking up her backpack.

"Kaede, you said you think you know where Kagome and Inuyasha may have gone?" Hojou asked.

She nodded. "Unfortunately I have no way to track them, but there are two very large youkai territories as you travel south. The Wolf Territory you will come across first," she pointed to the South-East, "starts about halfway to Nara. That is the direction your friends first started in. It is most likely that many youkai have been gathering up the shards for themselves. The wolf clan is very large, there is a good chance the trail may have led them there. Following that, towards Wakayama," she continued, her wrinkled finger moving South, "is Territory of the Dog."

Hojou's head cocked to the side. "Territory of the Dog? Inuyasha's dog youkai, isn't he?"

"Aye," she replied, her hand dropping again to her side. "It is ruled by a very ancient dog youkai, and it is the place of Inuyasha's ancestry."

He glanced wide-eyed at Sango. "Sounds like a place where Inuyasha might run to."

Kaede shook her head before Sango could reply. "Do not think he will find refuge there. Inuyasha is hanyou, and they are not seen as true youkai by most. He most likely will not be welcomed there."

Sango shoved back a sliver of pity that threatened to break through. She sighed heavily. "Okay, we should definitely check Wolf Territory first then. If youkai are collecting them, it's fairly safe to say they stopped there first."

Hojou frowned. "They have a pretty hefty head start. It might be better to head straight for Wakayama and maybe catch up with them there. Besides, I don't want to have to actually enter youkai territory if I can help it."

"Why's that?"

He swept his hand out. "We are very obviously human. And to be frank, sometimes youkai can just  _tell_  slayers apart from regular humans. Kagome should be okay with Inuyasha looking out for her, but we sure as hell won't be. I'm confident in my one-on-one ability against youkai, not in my one-on-three-hundred ability."

Shit, he was right. "Well, what if we miss them? How will we know?"

"We won't," he shrugged. "But I say we head straight there, wait a few days, and if they don't show up, start asking around. Youkai work a bit differently than humans. Those that live within their territories tend not to deal with technological advances. But they  _do_  know everyone else's business. Information for them is like a form of currency."

"We'll lose any element of surprise," she warned.

Hojou wrinkled his brow, thinking, then: "We don't have any other options, really. We'll go, set up camp, and hope for the best. If we have to out ourselves so be it."

Sango breathed in deep before letting it out in one big woosh. "So to the South, then."

"To the south," he agreed, then turned and bowed deeply to Kaede. "I cannot thank you enough for everything you've done for us. I truly hope to pay you back one day."

"Ah, you've already livened up my home, child. I need nothing else." She turned to Sango, who bowed just as Hojou did.

Argh, why couldn't she think of anything poignant to say? A measly 'thanks' didn't seem to be enough, but she was not nearly as adept as moving goodbyes as Hojou was. She opened her mouth, hoping a sincere 'thank you very much' would be enough, when she felt the old woman's touch on the back of her head.

She lifted her chin, her eyes meeting deep black.

Kaede was smiling down at her, all-knowing and all-accepting. "I leave you with only this, Sango," she said, "talk with Kagome and forgive her. Rebuild your friendship and ask Inuyasha to help you with your plight. Your anger will only make you more hateful. Seek your brother's freedom by way of fellowship instead. Inuyasha will help you. There is human deep-seeded inside of him."

She was tired, suddenly, like she couldn't conjure up the anger she'd come to know so well. There was so much she couldn't say. So much she could never say.

But was Kaede correct? Could she, by way of forgiveness, save her brother?

She nodded, taking Kaede's words for what they were, and promising herself she would at least think them over.

"Thank you," she finally said, "for everything." When she straightened out, Kaede's eyes were filled with unleashed tears.

She wiped at them with shaky hands, "all my children leave me in the end. It is a bitter, necessary cycle."

"We'll be back, Kaede," Hojou grinned, shouldering his pack and signaling Sango that it was time to go, "and we'll bring some sake to celebrate."

"Ah," Kaede replied, her smile wavering, "make sure to take two shots for every one of mine."

 _...What a strange way to put it,_  Sango thought as she turned and followed Hojou across the clearing and into the forest.

.

.

The days flew by and the pace Hojou set for them was intense. But Sango wouldn't complain if it killed her. She was just as eager to get the shards, to get to Kikyou and kill the bitch and get her brother back. She knew she  _should_  be thinking about what she was going to say to Kagome, though, when she saw her again. ...Her best friend.

As the landscape changed, Sango's body, despite the shard's help, started to burn with exhaustion, there was nothing to do but to keep her mind occupied, and due to Kaede's words, her mind was occupied with thoughts of Kagome. She mulled over the history, over the memories and the ups and downs they had shared.

Kagome was the first one to stick up for Sango in elementary school when she was getting picked on. Not that Sango had needed any help. Mostly the kids were afraid of her. But Kagome had stood up as they whispered about her and told them to stop. She was the first one who wasn't afraid of the ramifications to her own social life.

And from there, their friendship had grown, Sango exuding some sort of terrifying vibes, apparently, to those around her and Kagome taking it in and showing others that they had nothing to be afraid of. By the time high school had rolled around, it wasn't even a problem. No one was afraid of Sango anymore. She'd felt normal.

While she could always hold her own in a fight, while she'd always been confident in herself and liked the way she was, she'd felt in awe of Kagome. In her ability to walk into a room and calm things down.

So what had happened? How had her friend lost her cool so bad?

Inuyasha. Always, it came back to Inuyasha.

She bit at her tongue as her thoughts revolved back to Kagome's reaction to him when she first saw them together. The way her eyes moved, the way her breath came faster… the way blood flushed into her cheeks.

She'd never reacted that way to Hojou, that was for sure.

Inuyasha's magic… it was  _possible_ …

" _Kagome is not being spelled,"_  Kaede had said. " _It should be obvious to you that she is in love."_

The thought churned in her stomach. Because it wasn't just the idea of Inuyasha being a constant presence in her life that made Sango so angry. It was the knowledge that it wouldn't end well for Kagome. It  _couldn't_  end well for Kagome, even if Sango  _liked_  Inuyasha, even if he  _was_  the super stand up guy Kaede kept trying to convince her he was.

Because Inuyasha was a  _hanyou_. What life did he have in a human world? What kind of life could he and Kagome have together? He was at  _least_  three-hundred years old. Older, because he'd been stuck in that stupid mirror for that long. So, what… five-hundred years? Six-hundred?

Kagome would grow old and die at one-hundred, if she were lucky.

Sango glanced up quickly at Hojou, whose shirt was now completely soaked through with sweat despite the chilly weather. She could see the muscles under his skin move, fluid and tense as they jogged, hopping over rocks and tree roots. His focus was sharp, almost deadly. He wanted this as much as she did.

He wanted Kagome back.

Something new pushed at her, something she swallowed back as it threatened to choke her. It wasn't the usual rage that burned at her insides, it was something else. It swelled and grew, and she pushed it back. She pushed it back and she kept her pace.

They pressed forward.

.

.

"Here," Hojou said, stopping abruptly.

Sango wheeled forward a bit, inches from slamming into his back. She breathed in deep through her nose, trying her best to regulate her breathing. She was grateful for her years of training, for her parent's unyielding demands they forced on her. If anything would save her, it would be her cardio.

 _And the shard in your back, don't forget that,_  she thought, bitterness seeping into her thoughts.

"I haven't seen any animal tracks around. Certainly no youkai. You?"

She shook her head. "Nothing." Not that she knew what to look for, she'd never been taught how to track youkai, because up until a few months ago she hadn't even known they existed.

The corner of Hojou's mouth quirked up. "I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but we're certainly headed in the right direction, if this compass is to be believed." He tossed it to her, leaving Sango to scramble to catch it.

"What are we going to do once we get to Dog Territory?" she asked, her pointed glare going ignored.

He opened his pack and pulled out his sleeping gear. "We'll have to stay hidden, for sure. It won't do us any good to be taken in by the youkai before we run into Inuyasha."

She snorted, following his lead. "I doubt Inuyasha will have an issue with us being youkai bait."

A grin spread across his face. "That's what I'm counting on Kagome for, to keep the big, bad youkai at bay."

She straightened, glancing around the area he'd chosen to rest. The trees pressed in around them, the shade of the late afternoon quickly fading into night. The space was barely big enough to fit the both of them plus a small fire. It would be a tight fit, but if she were being honest, she felt safer having Hojou close by. Although she couldn't be accused of being a coward, this was no child's play. She would take all the comfort she could get.

"You have so much more confidence in her ability than I do," she finally said, kicking away small pebbles and twigs from her spot and pushing with her toes at the fallen leaves to make somewhat of an extra cushion.

Hojo paused in his movements, his sleeping bag halfway unrolled. His eyes darted up to meet hers, now serious. "I went back, you know."

Sango had returned to pulling out her sleeping gear. She refused to meet his gaze. "Where?" she asked. But she knew where.

"To the attic. While you were still recovering, I went back."

She sighed and stopped unpacking, finally allowing him to catch her eyes. "That probably wasn't very smart."

"No kidding. I still went, though."

"And?"

"It was… pretty sickening." He turned his gaze to the trees, losing himself in the memory. "There was a lot of blood. I could see the outline of…"

"...Of us?" Sango guessed, rolling out her bag and setting out her camping utensils.

"Yes, but let's not focus on that. I saw the outline of  _her_."

"Who, Kagome?

He shook his head. "Kikyou. There was… there was some of her  _flesh_  still stuck to the floor. It had been fused to the wood. It was black, like charcoal."

She plopped down heavy onto her bag, sighing with relief as her sore muscles got some rest. "Yeah, well, right before I lost consciousness, I saw her attack Kagome. And from Kagome, I saw..." her voice trailed off.

"So you know. You know what Kagome is capable of."

She snapped her teeth shut, eyebrows furrowing. "Kikyou was killing her. She was choking her, she… And then there was this light…"

He nodded. "She's a priestess, all right."

Reluctantly, Sango stood again on shaky legs and began to gather sticks for the beginning of a fire, wanting something to distract her from the words she uttered. "I thought she was dead. I thought we were all dead."

He scoffed, "Anyone going into that attic will one-hundred-percent think someone died in there. It's like a scene out of a horror movie."

"And yet here we are, alive. Yay."

His hand was on hers, stilling her movements once more. She turned her gaze up to him, surprised. She hadn't noticed that he moved.

"Hey," he said, his gaze soft, "it's good that you're alive. It's a good thing."

Another swell of that… that emotion that she couldn't quite place welled up inside her. She swallowed it down and shook off his hand. "Why did you even go back in the first place? To torture yourself?"

"No," he chuckled, retreating to his pack. "I was looking for my cell phone. I don't know what happened to it. Probably obliterated when…  _whatever_  it was happened in there." He glanced up at her again. "I didn't find yours, either."

"I figured. It doesn't matter though, I tried calling my parents from Kaede's house and just kept getting their voicemail."

"You worried?"

"Not as worried as I am about my brother."

"They don't know yet, huh?"

She shrugged. "I don't know what they know. The last time I talked to them dad gave me your number. They were out on a hunt, apparently."

He frowned but didn't reply.

"It's a good thing I got in contact with them at that point, at least. It brought you in to help me. And you've been very helpful."

The smile returned to his lips. "I have to admit, I was pretty cool, showing up at your house and surprising Inuyasha like that."

"He was beating the shit out of you."

"Hey, I was holding my own!"

She couldn't help but crack a smile herself. "Whatever you say, slayer. Help me collect the firewood so we can eat. I'm starving."

.

.

After dinner, Sango stayed awake a long while, staring across the dwindling fire at Hojou's back.

It was unfair. Once his head hit the coat he was using as a pillow, he was out instantly. But Sango tossed and turned for hours, until finally exhaustion took over and she couldn't help  _but close her eyes_.

_Fingers pushed into her back. A hundred fingers. A thousand. They pushed and poked and prodded, breaking down her muscles until they were nothing but moldable putty. Pain ravaged her, but she couldn't move - it was impossible to move - and then the slicing began._

_It started as sharp, little pricks, poking her open, and those fingers, the thousand of them, pressed little bits of glass shards deep into her back. Over and over again they sliced her open and pushed in, further and further until she could feel them press against the back of her heart._

_And she knew then, that those shards weren't just glass. They were_ jewels _. Every single jewel shard was being forced inside her, into her skin and sharp against her organs. And she knew, also, who's fingers pressed into her back. If she turned, she would see him._

_Her whole body trembled, her upper lip damped with sweat, eyes wide and heart thudding against the pricks of each jewel shard. But against her own voice screaming in her head, she turned._

_But it wasn't the monk's deep, lavender eyes that she'd expected. It was the face of her enemy._

" _Kikyou…" she breathed, the air rushing from her lungs as the jewel shards pierced into them, and they collapsed in on themselves._

_The priestess grinned, the evil bitch. If it was the last thing she would do, Sango would kill her. Take her down with her. But her arms wouldn't move and now she couldn't breathe. She was going to die. In her sleep, with her back made of mush and stuffed to the brim with jewel shards._

_Her vision blurred. She was done. Slowly the edges of the priestess's face faded to black. Sango blinked one last time. When her eyes opened, her hands were up. She couldn't feel them, but the hands -_ were  _they her hands? - were reaching for the priestess. They were bigger than she remembered her own hands being. The nails were wider. Blunter. Cut down to the shortest length possible._

 _...Those weren't her hands, reaching out and gripping onto the priestess's head, causing her image to flicker and then fade. Those weren't_ her  _hands…_

She heaved awake, her fully-inflated lungs gasping for air, sweat covering her body, her sleepwear stuck to her like a second skin.

"Slayer!"

Her arms flung out, fighting against the dark shadow in front of her. It wasn't until they were gripped by those same hands that she gave pause.

"Shhhh, Sango. Slayer. It's me."

And it was. She could see the violet color of the monk's eyes reflected off the dying glow of the fire. She opened her mouth to tell him off, because seriously, what the  _fuck_? But he shook his head and brought a finger up to his lips, signaling for her silence.

And then he stood and motioned for her to follow him, away from the safety of the campground and into the darkened forest.

 


	50. Nightmare

Sango

Sango reached behind her, touching at where she'd felt fingers pressing the jewel shards into her back only moments ago.

But her back was normal to the touch. Her muscles were strong and solid, her skin smooth, save for the scar her brother had given her when he drove his weapon into her back.

Grumbling multiple curses under her breath, Sango stood from her sleeping bag and picked up the extra blanket she had for warmth, wrapping it around her shoulders as she followed the monk into the forest She didn't bother to keep her footsteps quiet, and glared back when he shot her a quizzical glance.

 _The fuck?_  she thought.  _Is this stupid jewel in my back going to keep giving me nightmares?_  She just wanted her legs back and to get on with things, why did everything have to become so damn complicated?

She gradually worked herself into such an angry state that by the time the monk stopped, she exploded. "Seriously, you fucking ass,  _what the fuck_?" she shouted, her eyes outlining his shadowed form in the darkness.

"Are you okay?" he asked, voice calm and cool. Concerned, almost.

"You know I'm  _not fucking okay_. You put this piece of jewel in my back and now it's giving me fucking night terrors, as if my actual life isn't terrifying enough. You  _knew_ this would happen, and you-"

"It's not the jewel," he interrupted. His sleeve rustled as he moved. She heard his fingers snap, and a flame flickered up from the center of his palm. She could see his face now.

...Was it just her? Was it just the dark that surrounded them, or did his skin look ashen and pale? "What do you mean it's not the jewel?" she asked.

"The jewel itself doesn't invade your dreams. You were attacked."

Sango clutched the corners of the blanket in one hand and ran the other over her face. "What are you talking about? That doesn't make sense."

His lips pursed into a thin line. "Every day, Kikyou grows stronger. Her recovery is slow but steady. She's… finding the jewel shards," he said, looking as if the last few words were painful to speak aloud.

Sango's jaw dropped open. "Are you saying that priestess bitch knows there's a shard in my back? And she's fucking invading my mind while I sleep because of it?"

"In the strictest sense-"

"You put something in me that allows her to fucking track me?"

"No," he said, "she is not tracking you. I doubt she knows  _what_  she is doing. She is not consciously seeking out the shards. She broke the jewel when she ripped it out of the doppelganger for a purpose, and now that she is recovering, the spell she placed on the jewel is doing what it is meant to do."

"So what happened tonight then?"

"I can only guess that the spell is keeping those that have implanted themselves with the jewel shards weakened somehow. Fearful. But I am here, and I will keep her out of your dreams. Think, why did I wake you up when I did? After I pushed her out of your dream, I-"

"That was  _actually_ you in my dream?"

He paused before answering. "Yes. I am sorry I did not get to you sooner. I was… distracted."

"Distracted by what?"

He tried to hide the quirk of his mouth and failed. "It doesn't matter."

She huffed. "Fine. How did you even know she was in my head? Why didn't you just assume I was having a regular nightmare?"

"I have my own protections in place. Whether you believe it or not, I'm not out to make your life more miserable. I would like to leave you in one piece once I have attained my freedom and Kikyou is laid to rest. I am here to protect you."

She took a step back. "I don't want your protection."

"And yet you have it. I have forced the jewel shard upon you, and I will make sure you survive in spite of it."

Sango's breath quickened. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest. Was she afraid? Angry? She couldn't tell. It was too much. It was always too much. There was never a rest, never a pause, it was always one thing after another, constantly slamming into her.

She couldn't escape it.

"So am I going to have these nightmares every night?"

"There will be nightly attempts, most likely. They might grow stronger as time passes and Kikyou regains her strength. It is good that you and your friend are rushing to find Inuyasha and the doppelganger. The faster the jewel is collected and used to rid us of Kikyou, the safer you will be."

"Great, so sleeping will be super fun from now on."

He stepped forward and leaned down so their gaze was at an equal level. "I will not become distracted again. You can be sure that your dreams will be safe." He reached his hand out, as if to sweep her bangs from her forehead.

Sango's breath caught in her throat.

The monk's eyes widened, mimicking her own, as if he'd just realized what he was doing. His hand stayed in midair, hovering only for a moment before he withdrew it. "You can be sure of it," he continued, straightening out and stepping back. "Sleep well knowing so."

Heat spread across her face. "I-" she said, her heart thumping in her chest, "I don't trust you."

"Ah," he said, his eyes sad again, "your trust is to be earned, and I have no doubt you will make me work for it." He leaned back, resting against a tree, his hand with the flame lowering a bit so it was set better between them. "I am sorry to have pulled you away from your campsite."

"I'm fine," she said without hesitation.

"You're shivering. You're soaked."

She opened up the blanket and glanced down at her sleepwear. She  _was_  freezing, and he hadn't noticed it at all. All that sweat from her nightmare had turned into an ice bath in the crisp, fall air. She'd been too angry and then too…  _flustered_ to realize, but her whole body was shivering.

"Dammit," she said. She was going to tell him to mind his own business, that it didn't matter, but when her eyes darted up to his he flinched and looked away.

She stared as his cheeks burned a deep red. "Were you…" her voice trailed off, shocked at how blatant he'd been about it. "Were you just  _ogling_  me?" she asked, voiced filled with indignation.

"I do not know what you speak of, Slayer," he said, pointedly looking at the dark sky, rather than at her.

"You were just fucking  _ogling_  me, you  _pervert_."

"I was not  _ogling_ , I was…  _appreciating_."

"Appreciate  _this_ ," she snapped, lifting her middle finger up in the air and pushing it out towards him so he  _really_  got the message.

He blinked down at her offending appendage. "What are you doing?"

She felt the blood drain from her face. "What do you mean? This!" she cried, pushing her finger closer to his face, "This! Fuck you!"

"I've never seen that expression formed in this way."

Livid that he couldn't quite grasp the gravity of her insult, she pulled her hand back and wrapped the blanket tighter around her. "Well, that's what it means. A big 'fuck you!' What do you think is going to happen here?"

The quirk returned her his lips. "Just appreciating art where I find it."

" _Art_ ," she snorted, "you pig."

"You may insult me all you want, Slayer, but let us get you to bed, you have a long day tomorrow."

"Don't bother, I'll go back  _myself_ , thank you very much!" And with that, she turned and stormed away, through the darkness and in the general direction they'd come from.

She found her way, alright, although it took longer than it should have.  _Next time, bring a damn flashlight,_  she chided herself as her head lay on the blanket. The fire was now crisp embers, Hojou still sleeping soundly where she'd left him. She closed her eyes to let sleep come to her as well, but of course it didn't. Of  _course_  it didn't.

.

.

"Sleep okay?" Hojou asked as he sprung out of his sleeping bag like he did every single morning, as if he were some hyperactive twelve-year-old. Where did he get his invisible insta-coffee? She wanted some of that.

She sighed inwardly before sitting up. "Slept fine," she lied, rubbing at her eyes and hoping he took it for sleepiness.

"Let's pack everything and go," he said, moving around the campsite with ease.

Groaning as quietly as possible, Sango followed his lead, pinching herself to try and keep her eyes open.  _No problem, you've got this_ , she repeated in her head, determined to stay awake.

The grueling pace was set again, and Sango kept her mind on her goal as best she could, along with the memory of the monk's eyes on her body which allowed renewed anger to sweep through her. It kept her feet moving.

As night fell they set up camp again, another small clearing, another small fire, more gathering of clean water from a nearby stream, more dehydrated food… Even though it terrified her, Sango went through the motions and laid down in bed. She tried to keep her eyes open… She  _tried..._

She jerked awake.

 _...Oh, thank god._  Hojou was still sleeping soundly, his back turned towards the fire, his shoulders moving up and down with each even, predictable breath. She felt her own breath spill from her lungs, relieved that everything seemed to be in order.

Except… the forest was quiet.

Not the deafening quiet of the night, where creatures come out of day-hibernation and call out to each other. Not the waterfall backdrop of crickets and owls and night critters…

This was blanket silence. Nothing spoke. Hojou's breath, while she could  _see_  it pushing in and out of him, stayed mute.

And then  _her back hardened. It started at the base of her spine; Slow, creeping centimeters freezing each vertebrae one at a time. When she reached around to feel it, it wasn't skin that her fingertips touched, it was unyielding_ crystal  _\- no - unyielding_ jewel _. The shard inside of her had begun to consume her, and it was taking her, bit-by-bit, her body nothing but fodder for its curse._

_Between the trees, the priestess materialized out of the darkness. Her pale face was covered in burns. Burns in the shape of two hands that dashed across her lids and cheeks and lips._

_Sango tried to rear back, her mouth opening wide to scream, but she couldn't move. Her legs were solid. Her lower back was solid. It crept further up her spine, until she couldn't turn her head. She couldn't look away._

_She couldn't look away as the priestess's eyes opened, her lashes long and dark against her paint-white skin. But as she neared, Sango saw that her pupils were seared. Scared over, just like her face. Her chin was tilted up and she moved it slowly around the clearing, her chest expanding with his inhale, as if she were sniffing someone out…_

She's sniffing me out!  _Sango screamed, the sound failing to escape from her lips._

_Kikyou's arms reached out, her fingers stretched as they felt the air around her. Searching. Searching. Closer and closer._

_But then movement behind the priestess, through the trees where she had come from. Sango recognized the purple cloth and deep violet eyes of the monk. He was sneaking up behind her, and in his hand he held a sliver of a rock, its sharp, pointed edge glistening in the firelight._

_Wide-eyed and terrified, her breath slowly freezing in her lungs, Sango watched as he whipped his arms around the priestess's head, one hand gripping her chin and the other slashing deftly across her throat._

_Blood splattered across Sango's face, drenching her with it. It sizzled and burned, as if it were on fire, soaking into her. But she couldn't scream, she couldn't breathe, even as the monk lunged for her, his arms outstretched-_

" _Wake up!_ " he hissed, his hands gripping at her shirt as he shook her gently.

Each inhale was a gift. Sango sucked the air in, her sobs drowning out her desperate gasps. The monk was leaning over her. His face filled up the night sky.

"Shhh, Sango. Quiet. I got you out." He repeated his words as she sobbed.

She tried to stop. She did. But it was uncontrollable, the fear. It gnawed at her insides, even as she became aware that her body could still move. "N-no," she sobbed. "No!"

"Sorry," he said. "I'm sorry." He wrapped his arms around her as she buried her face into his robes, the fabric muffling her cries.

"She's coming for me."

"No. She's not," he insisted, voice calm and comforting. "It was not her in your dream, Sango."

"You said I could sleep safely, but I can't. She's there every time I close my eyes." Her hands went around his waist, hugging him closer, relishing in the very real feel of his human body against her own. It grounded her, even though her head was a mess.

"I'm sorry," he apologized again, a remorseful strain to his voice. "Kikyou is powerful and so is the jewel spell. It took me a long time to find my way in."

"I was paralyzed again. The jewel was consuming me." She drew back to look into his eyes, begging with her own to tell her the truth. "Will that eventually happen to me? Will the jewel freeze me into place again? Will it paralyze me?"

His hand came up to push her sweat-matted hair away from her face, his fingertips soft and warm against her forehead. "No," he whispered. "I gave you the jewel so you would have the freedom of your legs again. It's only in your mind."

She shook her head, fresh tears springing up and falling from her lashes. "I can't lose my legs again, I  _can't_ -"

"Sango, look at me," he said, his hands moving to cup her cheeks and force her eyes to meet his. "I will  _not allow_  anything to happen to you. If there was someone else… if there was  _anyone_  else I could have to suffer in your place instead, I would do so in an instant, but it must be you. I have given you your legs back, and while you may not believe it yet, I fully intend on you walking away from this unpleasantness with them in full use."

She gripped his robes tightly in her fists, her body quivering. "I don't… want to have a nightmare again," she admitted.

The monk nodded. "Of course. The closer I am in proximity to you, the more likely it is that I am able to keep the spell away from your consciousness. I will stay here. You may sleep again."

She breathed in deep, realizing for the first time that he smelled of warm spice and amber. It stilled her scattered, terrified thoughts. It calmed her rattled, trying brain. She allowed his scent to wash over her, allowed his open palm, which moved across her back in lazy, comforting circles, to still the throbbing in her head.

A few hours passed before her tears died, and the monk stayed where he was. Sango's eyes began to close. She drifted, her thoughts pleasantly fuzzy and mild.  _Is he doing this?_  she wondered.  _Is he keeping my thoughts calm?_

His hand moved lower and gave a gentle squeeze.

Sango reared up, completely awake, and slapped him clean across his face. "Dammit!" she hissed, pushing at his chest to move him away. "What the hell is wrong with you,  _pervert_?"

He leaned back, his hands up and out of the way. "Sorry!" he said sheepishly. "They have a mind of their own!"

"Well keep them away from  _me_ ," she snapped, before flipping over and tugging her sleeping bag up over her shoulder. The fuck was wrong with him? No… what the fuck was wrong with  _her_? She'd allowed him to lull her into a false sense of security, with his nice smell and the fuzzy way he calmed her conscious.

She heard the rustling of his robes as he moved to stand and her breath hitched in her throat. She turned her chin over her shoulder, panic beginning to set in. "But don't go too far!" she pleaded, well aware what his distance meant for her sleep.

His amused smile contrasted sharply against the red hand-mark on his cheek. "I'll be right here," he said, sitting down against the base of a tree a foot or so from her head.

She snuggled deeper into her sleeping bag, curling up in herself, waiting for her thoughts to return to the jumbled mess they'd been before.

But they were surprisingly pleasant, and since Sango hadn't gotten much sleep in the last forty-eight hours, she wasn't going to pass up the opportunity now.

She closed her eyes, her mind drifting once more.

She dreamed she was walking in the deep woods, light filtering through the treetops and amber droplets falling from the sky.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, comments and critiques are welcome.
> 
> I'm excited about this one. Hope you've enjoyed! See you soon for the next chapter.
> 
> ~SugarRos


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